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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:24,586 --> 00:01:27,789 I was 25 when my sister got married. 2 00:01:28,155 --> 00:01:30,324 My parents were thrilled... 3 00:01:31,224 --> 00:01:32,459 because Arundhathi, 4 00:01:32,627 --> 00:01:34,326 after scaring the shit out of them 5 00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:35,327 with a string 6 00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:37,497 of truly atrocious college boyfriends, 7 00:01:38,131 --> 00:01:39,264 had finally agreed 8 00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,869 to let them fix her up with, as my mom puts it, 9 00:01:42,570 --> 00:01:45,303 "A nice Indian boy." 10 00:01:46,139 --> 00:01:49,544 Ah, beautiful Manish Rao... 11 00:01:50,143 --> 00:01:52,780 a future orthopedic surgeon, no less. 12 00:01:53,413 --> 00:01:56,618 I think my dad actually cried when my mom told him that, 13 00:01:56,884 --> 00:01:58,116 which is funnier if you know 14 00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,755 that my dad's face usually looks like this. 15 00:02:02,624 --> 00:02:05,593 This was the best day of my mother's life. 16 00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:08,328 Just look at her face. 17 00:02:12,667 --> 00:02:14,533 And this man is Pandit Kumar, 18 00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:16,902 and he is about to get in my business. 19 00:02:16,904 --> 00:02:19,605 Next one of these, it'll be you out there. 20 00:02:23,611 --> 00:02:24,879 I would hear that 21 00:02:25,345 --> 00:02:27,849 over and over again... 22 00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:33,487 You're next, my friend. 23 00:02:39,426 --> 00:02:41,459 ...an endless chorus of reminders 24 00:02:41,461 --> 00:02:44,164 that one day, I'd have this too-- 25 00:02:44,565 --> 00:02:46,634 the big Indian wedding. 26 00:02:48,870 --> 00:02:50,805 Just one concern. 27 00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:58,678 What will it look like 28 00:02:58,680 --> 00:03:02,948 when I bring home a nice Indian boy? 29 00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:12,190 They obviously know I'm gay. 30 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:15,460 They've just never seen me be gay with another... gay. 31 00:03:15,462 --> 00:03:16,564 Naveen! 32 00:03:17,330 --> 00:03:18,933 What are you doing hiding over here? 33 00:03:19,701 --> 00:03:21,201 Today was leg day. 34 00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:22,535 I lift. Do you lift? 35 00:03:22,537 --> 00:03:23,769 Yeah, all the time. 36 00:03:24,806 --> 00:03:26,539 Come on, I wanna see you on the dance floor, man! 37 00:03:26,541 --> 00:03:27,407 Okay. 38 00:03:28,475 --> 00:03:29,508 Can I ask you something? 39 00:03:29,510 --> 00:03:31,677 Mm-hmm. 40 00:03:31,679 --> 00:03:33,480 You see any girls you like out there? 41 00:03:35,248 --> 00:03:36,316 No. 42 00:03:36,918 --> 00:03:39,419 That's too bad. I'm a sick wingman. 43 00:03:41,689 --> 00:03:42,924 You're next, buddy! 44 00:04:10,283 --> 00:04:11,784 Hi, Naveen. Where are you? 45 00:04:11,786 --> 00:04:14,352 Uh, it's 8:00 a.m. I'm at the hospital. 46 00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:16,021 Your Triple-A membership is expired. 47 00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:17,322 You want me to renew it? 48 00:04:17,324 --> 00:04:19,390 Is this really important right now? 49 00:04:19,392 --> 00:04:20,593 I don't know. 50 00:04:20,595 --> 00:04:22,695 Maybe you're driving around recklessly all over town, 51 00:04:22,697 --> 00:04:23,729 and you're, like, "oh... 52 00:04:23,731 --> 00:04:25,664 they will come and tow me, that Triple-A!" 53 00:04:25,666 --> 00:04:27,365 Doesn't your hammer-calling me about this 54 00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:28,501 just make that more likely? 55 00:04:28,503 --> 00:04:30,035 My god! Are you driving right now? 56 00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:31,203 Pull over! 57 00:04:31,205 --> 00:04:32,538 No, I'm not driving. I'm at the hospital. 58 00:04:32,540 --> 00:04:34,673 Okay, I'll renew it for you. Don't tell your father. 59 00:04:34,675 --> 00:04:36,307 Okay, wow, thank you so much. 60 00:04:36,309 --> 00:04:37,777 I really appreciate you. Okay, bye. 61 00:04:37,779 --> 00:04:40,345 Hey! Listen! Did you watch that movie "Milk"? 62 00:04:40,347 --> 00:04:42,480 I saw it last night on OutTV, 63 00:04:42,482 --> 00:04:44,018 you know the channel for out gays? 64 00:04:44,552 --> 00:04:45,518 Yes. I know. 65 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:46,687 You like that movie? 66 00:04:46,854 --> 00:04:48,353 No, Mom. I haven't seen it. 67 00:04:48,355 --> 00:04:50,992 You know, in that movie, this man, Milk, 68 00:04:51,358 --> 00:04:53,661 he moves to Castro with his boyfriend, Smith. 69 00:04:53,828 --> 00:04:55,360 Very handsome couple! 70 00:04:55,362 --> 00:04:57,295 Anyway, Milk enters politics, but-- 71 00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:59,632 -I don't need a recap. -Smith doesn't like it! 72 00:04:59,634 --> 00:05:00,835 So they break up. 73 00:05:01,502 --> 00:05:02,670 Okay! No problem. 74 00:05:02,837 --> 00:05:04,537 Milk ends up getting elected 75 00:05:04,539 --> 00:05:06,906 to the San Francisco Board of Supervisors. 76 00:05:06,908 --> 00:05:07,940 Oh, does he? 77 00:05:07,942 --> 00:05:10,077 And there, he meets this man, Dan White. 78 00:05:10,678 --> 00:05:13,779 Now, this Dan White does not like the gays. 79 00:05:13,781 --> 00:05:14,379 Mm-hmm? 80 00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,714 So Dan White kills Milk! 81 00:05:15,716 --> 00:05:16,551 Oh, no. 82 00:05:16,717 --> 00:05:17,783 He's the Thanos. 83 00:05:17,785 --> 00:05:20,786 Oh! Yeah, no, I'm gonna have to check that out. 84 00:05:20,788 --> 00:05:23,388 I guess this is why Sean Penn got divorced. 85 00:05:23,390 --> 00:05:24,123 Uh... 86 00:05:24,125 --> 00:05:25,825 I think he was just acting. 87 00:05:25,827 --> 00:05:26,792 Hi, Mrs. G! 88 00:05:26,794 --> 00:05:29,028 And how in these movies do gay people know 89 00:05:29,030 --> 00:05:30,731 who the other gay people are? 90 00:05:30,898 --> 00:05:32,531 Like, they just give each other a look, 91 00:05:32,533 --> 00:05:34,066 and like, boom! They're kissing. 92 00:05:34,068 --> 00:05:35,868 What's she talking about, a movie? 93 00:05:35,870 --> 00:05:36,802 Mom, it's just a movie. 94 00:05:36,804 --> 00:05:37,603 What movie? 95 00:05:37,605 --> 00:05:38,706 Is that what you do? 96 00:05:38,873 --> 00:05:40,506 I don't want you to get into trouble! 97 00:05:40,508 --> 00:05:41,740 Ask if she watched "Bros." 98 00:05:41,742 --> 00:05:42,541 Uh, oh? 99 00:05:42,543 --> 00:05:43,374 What is that, nurse? 100 00:05:43,376 --> 00:05:44,712 -There's no nurse. -They're coding? 101 00:05:44,979 --> 00:05:46,444 That's a lot of... blood. 102 00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:48,716 There's a mother? In the ICU? 103 00:05:48,883 --> 00:05:50,585 Uh, yes, I'll be right there. 104 00:05:50,751 --> 00:05:52,383 I must help every mother. 105 00:05:52,385 --> 00:05:55,988 Maybe I should go to the ICU so I can finally see you. 106 00:05:55,990 --> 00:05:56,989 All right, bye, love you. 107 00:05:56,991 --> 00:05:58,593 Wait! Wait! I'm having a heart atta--! 108 00:07:34,922 --> 00:07:35,754 Whatever. 109 00:07:41,829 --> 00:07:43,030 Hey, Ben. 110 00:07:44,131 --> 00:07:46,067 How is it going, question mark. 111 00:07:47,034 --> 00:07:48,970 Haven't heard from you in a while, 112 00:07:49,937 --> 00:07:51,471 exclamation mark. 113 00:07:52,506 --> 00:07:56,510 Guess you've been eating an apple a day, 114 00:07:57,477 --> 00:08:01,481 because you've kept this doctor away. 115 00:08:01,649 --> 00:08:02,817 Hi, Jeremy. 116 00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:05,184 Um, I was talking to my mom today, 117 00:08:05,186 --> 00:08:06,988 and I remembered you have a mom, 118 00:08:07,188 --> 00:08:08,923 so how... how are you, man... 119 00:08:09,123 --> 00:08:10,024 question mark. 120 00:08:10,658 --> 00:08:11,525 Delete. 121 00:08:11,759 --> 00:08:12,858 Thanks, Charlotte. 122 00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:15,260 I actually don't need a plus-one to the wedding, 123 00:08:15,262 --> 00:08:16,931 because I'm happy with myself, 124 00:08:17,832 --> 00:08:19,497 and I'm really not lonely. 125 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,735 Hey, Edmund. 126 00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:23,504 Um, I saw that you're engaged, 127 00:08:23,771 --> 00:08:25,573 but in case it doesn't work out, 128 00:08:25,906 --> 00:08:27,641 um, wanna go out, question mark. 129 00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:28,943 Delete. Delete. 130 00:08:29,643 --> 00:08:30,244 Sent. 131 00:08:30,745 --> 00:08:31,779 Hey, Rahul. 132 00:08:33,114 --> 00:08:34,613 Um... was drinking water today 133 00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:35,814 and thought of you 134 00:08:35,816 --> 00:08:36,849 Ha... 135 00:08:36,851 --> 00:08:38,552 because you said you need to drink more water. 136 00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:42,256 ha... ha...ha... 137 00:08:43,591 --> 00:08:44,892 Oh, god, this sucks. 138 00:08:45,126 --> 00:08:46,792 I sound like Jeffrey Dahmer. 139 00:08:46,794 --> 00:08:49,128 ...diamonds. 140 00:08:49,130 --> 00:08:51,563 We only have about 25 of that ring. 141 00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:53,132 It's already starting to sell. 142 00:08:53,134 --> 00:08:56,270 Okay, and is the cough dry or productive? 143 00:08:56,637 --> 00:08:58,606 Gloria! My favourite patient. 144 00:08:59,140 --> 00:09:00,105 How's the ulcer? 145 00:09:00,107 --> 00:09:03,809 On a scale of one to ten, how much phlegm? 146 00:09:03,811 --> 00:09:04,943 Oh, we do have your X-rays... 147 00:09:04,945 --> 00:09:08,849 No. I know it's 11, but the scale is from one to-- 148 00:09:09,016 --> 00:09:10,015 It's not looking good. 149 00:09:10,017 --> 00:09:12,151 Okay, and then how many drinks, uh, per day, 150 00:09:12,153 --> 00:09:13,285 would you say you're having? 151 00:09:13,287 --> 00:09:15,921 I-I don't want to get too graphic, but, one time-- 152 00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:17,256 Yes, beer counts as alcohol. 153 00:09:17,258 --> 00:09:18,690 I was hooking up with a guy... 154 00:09:18,692 --> 00:09:19,658 That's not good. 155 00:09:19,660 --> 00:09:20,793 ...bent his dick backwards... 156 00:09:20,795 --> 00:09:22,995 You. Get your picture taken. 157 00:09:22,997 --> 00:09:24,698 They need you with Sepsis Guy in 10. 158 00:09:25,266 --> 00:09:26,899 -Huh? -It's portrait day! 159 00:09:26,901 --> 00:09:28,200 Ooh! 160 00:09:28,202 --> 00:09:31,203 I heard from Sam in Radiology that the photographer is hot! 161 00:09:31,205 --> 00:09:32,337 Oh, fun! 162 00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:34,106 Oh, don't worry, they'll fix your hair in PhotoShop. 163 00:09:34,108 --> 00:09:35,107 What's wrong with my hair? 164 00:09:35,109 --> 00:09:36,977 Yes, let's focus on your personal grooming, 165 00:09:37,278 --> 00:09:39,580 not all the sick people who need your care. 166 00:09:40,815 --> 00:09:41,847 What's wrong with it? 167 00:09:41,849 --> 00:09:43,715 On this side, I feel like maybe you could-- 168 00:09:50,925 --> 00:09:53,194 Ahem. 169 00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:56,197 Really nice. Thank you. 170 00:09:58,599 --> 00:09:59,233 Have a good one. 171 00:10:10,678 --> 00:10:12,644 Okay, so you can just have a seat right there 172 00:10:12,646 --> 00:10:13,881 on that little stool. 173 00:10:17,351 --> 00:10:18,283 Ganesh, right? 174 00:10:18,285 --> 00:10:20,252 Hmm? 175 00:10:20,254 --> 00:10:22,056 Uh, no, it's Gavaskar. 176 00:10:23,023 --> 00:10:24,125 No, sorry. 177 00:10:24,892 --> 00:10:26,827 I saw you at the temple last night, 178 00:10:26,994 --> 00:10:28,696 in front of the Ganesh altar. 179 00:10:28,996 --> 00:10:32,066 Oh! Oh, yeah. 180 00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:35,634 That was, uh... th-that-- yeah. 181 00:10:35,636 --> 00:10:36,869 You know Ganesh? 182 00:10:40,207 --> 00:10:42,674 I'm Jay. I promise I'm not following you. 183 00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:44,178 I'm just in this neighbourhood this week. 184 00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,347 Oh. Okay. 185 00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:50,983 You ready? 186 00:10:50,985 --> 00:10:52,017 Mm-hmm. 187 00:10:52,019 --> 00:10:54,388 Okay. So look over here. 188 00:10:54,989 --> 00:10:56,855 Yep. There you go. 189 00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:58,325 And, uh, keep your head just like that. 190 00:10:59,293 --> 00:11:00,194 Nice. 191 00:11:00,361 --> 00:11:03,330 And bring your eyes... here. 192 00:11:04,865 --> 00:11:07,833 Okay, now smile. Be yourself. 193 00:11:07,835 --> 00:11:08,435 Oh. 194 00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:11,136 Not so contained. 195 00:11:11,138 --> 00:11:13,138 Oh... okay. 196 00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:15,376 You don't have to bunch up. 197 00:11:17,945 --> 00:11:19,246 There we go. 198 00:11:21,048 --> 00:11:22,283 That's really nice. 199 00:11:24,919 --> 00:11:25,719 You ready? 200 00:11:34,295 --> 00:11:36,030 Are you two going to be a while? 201 00:11:36,330 --> 00:11:39,133 It was great to see you again. 202 00:11:39,967 --> 00:11:41,300 -Actually-- -Jesus H. Christ. 203 00:11:41,302 --> 00:11:42,602 Sorry. 204 00:11:42,604 --> 00:11:45,837 Listen. I've got an extra ticket to a film screening on Sunday, 205 00:11:45,839 --> 00:11:49,241 it's my dad's favourite movie, if you want to join me? 206 00:11:49,243 --> 00:11:51,176 Uh, I'll-I'll check my-- I'll check my calendar, 207 00:11:51,178 --> 00:11:53,847 but yes, yes, I think my-- I think I'll be-- 208 00:11:54,014 --> 00:11:55,714 which is, uh, which movie? 209 00:12:25,145 --> 00:12:26,080 Do you, um... 210 00:12:27,147 --> 00:12:29,483 watch a lot of foreign films? 211 00:12:30,818 --> 00:12:32,820 No. Yes. I'm sorry. 212 00:12:33,153 --> 00:12:34,321 I'm adopted. 213 00:12:34,488 --> 00:12:35,487 Oh! 214 00:12:35,489 --> 00:12:37,157 I was raised by Indian parents. 215 00:12:37,324 --> 00:12:38,390 I grew up on that movie. 216 00:12:38,392 --> 00:12:40,027 It always reminds me of them. 217 00:12:40,327 --> 00:12:42,263 They, uh, they passed away. 218 00:12:42,530 --> 00:12:44,997 Oh, gosh. I-I'm so sorry. 219 00:12:44,999 --> 00:12:46,767 They were older when they adopted me, so... 220 00:12:52,806 --> 00:12:53,907 It is weird, isn't it? 221 00:12:54,808 --> 00:12:56,076 What? 222 00:12:56,243 --> 00:12:58,879 I took you to that movie. We met at a temple. 223 00:12:59,847 --> 00:13:01,315 My last name is Kurundkar. 224 00:13:02,016 --> 00:13:02,848 It's not we-- 225 00:13:02,850 --> 00:13:04,783 It was very weird. 226 00:13:04,785 --> 00:13:07,052 I don't know, people get adopted. 227 00:13:07,054 --> 00:13:07,953 My parents are white. 228 00:13:07,955 --> 00:13:08,920 Sure, but that's not-- 229 00:13:08,922 --> 00:13:11,223 So now I love boat shoes and Diane Keaton. 230 00:13:11,225 --> 00:13:13,227 Okay, we're getting a little sidetracked. 231 00:13:13,394 --> 00:13:15,796 That movie was darker than I remembered. 232 00:13:16,297 --> 00:13:17,398 Dark? 233 00:13:17,565 --> 00:13:19,400 Her dad was obviously a psychopath. 234 00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:22,834 Eh, he was passionate. 235 00:13:22,836 --> 00:13:24,504 And if SRK hadn't shown up, 236 00:13:24,506 --> 00:13:26,405 she would've just married the other psychopath. 237 00:13:26,407 --> 00:13:27,408 But he did show up! 238 00:13:28,876 --> 00:13:30,377 That's what makes it romantic. 239 00:13:31,879 --> 00:13:33,045 He showed up, 240 00:13:33,047 --> 00:13:35,082 even though their love seemed completely impossible. 241 00:13:36,383 --> 00:13:38,317 So corny, right? 242 00:13:38,319 --> 00:13:39,951 I mean, who talks like that? 243 00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:41,554 It's like he's in the movie. 244 00:13:41,556 --> 00:13:43,021 Mm-hmm. 245 00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:45,025 I think you're missing the heart of this movie. 246 00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:46,858 I am? 247 00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:48,596 Yeah, that scene before the end of intermission, 248 00:13:49,363 --> 00:13:51,263 when Kajol is resigned to her fate, 249 00:13:51,265 --> 00:13:52,964 that she's gonna be forever separated 250 00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:54,168 from the man she loves, 251 00:13:54,335 --> 00:13:55,400 she is at her lowest moment, 252 00:13:55,402 --> 00:13:57,369 and she hears the cowbell-- 253 00:13:57,371 --> 00:13:58,506 and then there he is... 254 00:13:58,906 --> 00:14:00,105 and then he stands there 255 00:14:00,107 --> 00:14:01,006 in the middle of 256 00:14:01,008 --> 00:14:02,843 all these yellow flowers, 257 00:14:04,078 --> 00:14:04,878 and he sings. 258 00:14:09,149 --> 00:14:09,551 Oh. 259 00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:10,451 Yeah. 260 00:14:11,285 --> 00:14:12,184 -Oh... -Yeah! 261 00:14:12,186 --> 00:14:12,984 Fuck. 262 00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:13,954 Mm. 263 00:14:20,094 --> 00:14:21,128 Read the room. 264 00:14:21,529 --> 00:14:22,996 Or be in a room! 265 00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:27,968 And then it's 266 00:14:29,537 --> 00:14:32,206 Ahem. 267 00:14:37,044 --> 00:14:38,243 Wow. 268 00:14:44,519 --> 00:14:47,018 Thank you. 269 00:14:47,020 --> 00:14:48,353 That was a little over the top. 270 00:14:48,355 --> 00:14:49,454 Sorry. That happens. 271 00:14:49,456 --> 00:14:50,290 No, it's okay. 272 00:14:54,928 --> 00:14:57,297 I think a lot of people find Bollywood a bit much. 273 00:14:58,098 --> 00:14:59,466 Yeah? 274 00:15:00,502 --> 00:15:03,303 But I think it's because we're all a little embarrassed. 275 00:15:03,605 --> 00:15:04,438 Embarrassed...? 276 00:15:05,139 --> 00:15:08,108 By the bigness of love. 277 00:15:09,476 --> 00:15:13,378 I don't want to hear, like, sweeping notions of love. 278 00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:15,015 Oh, yeah, that sounds horrible. 279 00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:16,415 It's 2024. The world is burning. 280 00:15:16,417 --> 00:15:17,317 So you went home? 281 00:15:30,097 --> 00:15:31,163 Oh, wow. 282 00:15:31,165 --> 00:15:32,598 Uhh. 283 00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:37,169 Um, yeah, what's really interesting 284 00:15:37,171 --> 00:15:40,540 is that we have a Panera Bread inside the hospital. 285 00:15:40,542 --> 00:15:42,542 Oh, my god. Not the hospital stories. 286 00:15:42,544 --> 00:15:44,376 Are you kidding? -They are interesting. 287 00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:46,445 -They are not, they're very-- -They are interesting. 288 00:15:46,447 --> 00:15:47,345 It's really interesting, 289 00:15:47,347 --> 00:15:49,214 because, like, the parking structure 290 00:15:49,216 --> 00:15:50,683 is divided by numbers, 291 00:15:50,685 --> 00:15:52,384 so it's, like, one through seven, 292 00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,319 but then there's, like, letters, too, 293 00:15:54,321 --> 00:15:57,222 so it's like you can park in 1-A, 1-B, 1-C... 294 00:15:57,224 --> 00:15:59,057 Do you know how many medical shows are on TV? 295 00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:00,626 Do you think no one's watching those? 296 00:16:00,628 --> 00:16:01,661 On a date? 297 00:16:01,663 --> 00:16:03,596 No one's trying to fuck after E.R. 298 00:16:03,598 --> 00:16:04,496 What's really crazy 299 00:16:04,498 --> 00:16:06,566 is that Grey's Anatomy is still good. 300 00:16:06,568 --> 00:16:09,537 I would say season 16 onwards, 301 00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:12,306 it's better than most things on TV. 302 00:16:12,473 --> 00:16:14,609 So you were enjoying yourself? 303 00:16:14,975 --> 00:16:15,974 Also, he vapes. 304 00:16:16,811 --> 00:16:18,145 -Do you want some of this? -Oh, no. 305 00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:20,314 Uh, uh, no. I mean, uh, 306 00:16:20,481 --> 00:16:23,048 I-I'm totally cool with it. My parents aren't, but I am. 307 00:16:23,050 --> 00:16:24,218 I just do it when I'm nervous. 308 00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:29,223 You're nervous? 309 00:16:32,292 --> 00:16:33,393 A little bit, yeah. 310 00:16:38,065 --> 00:16:39,665 Ohh! 311 00:16:39,667 --> 00:16:42,367 Anxious people are the best in bed, 312 00:16:42,369 --> 00:16:43,068 because you know why? 313 00:16:43,070 --> 00:16:44,770 -Why? -They try harder. 314 00:16:44,772 --> 00:16:46,639 Anyways, um... 315 00:16:46,641 --> 00:16:48,173 then he told me all these stories 316 00:16:48,175 --> 00:16:49,644 about his childhood. 317 00:16:50,377 --> 00:16:53,746 Um, like how he went through 12 different foster homes, 318 00:16:53,748 --> 00:16:55,783 just kept moving and moving. 319 00:16:56,216 --> 00:16:57,783 He didn't even have a suitcase. 320 00:16:57,785 --> 00:17:00,555 He just carried all of his stuff in plastic bags... 321 00:17:01,656 --> 00:17:05,058 ...until one day, he became a Kurundkar. 322 00:17:06,360 --> 00:17:08,628 Theirs was the first home where I felt like belonged, 323 00:17:08,630 --> 00:17:09,463 they were my family. 324 00:17:11,666 --> 00:17:13,033 Hmm. Of course. 325 00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:18,506 I guess I'd never really, like, felt love 326 00:17:19,306 --> 00:17:20,773 before my parents, 327 00:17:20,775 --> 00:17:24,077 and it's like they instilled in me this... 328 00:17:26,079 --> 00:17:27,813 feeling... it's like a feeling of home. 329 00:17:27,815 --> 00:17:30,248 It's not even like a literal house or a location. 330 00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,617 It can kind of go anywhere. 331 00:17:34,656 --> 00:17:36,691 I would have liked to have them see me grow up... 332 00:17:38,358 --> 00:17:39,594 ...be with someone. 333 00:17:41,194 --> 00:17:43,130 You know, that's what I love about DDLJ. 334 00:17:43,565 --> 00:17:45,831 it doesn't end with the couple getting together in the end, 335 00:17:45,833 --> 00:17:47,535 like in an American movie... 336 00:17:47,769 --> 00:17:50,503 because it's not about two people going at it alone, 337 00:17:50,505 --> 00:17:52,370 clinging to each other like life rafts. 338 00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:53,641 It's about everybody, together. 339 00:17:55,743 --> 00:17:57,444 The family, the wedding... 340 00:17:59,446 --> 00:18:00,782 Do you ever think about that? 341 00:18:02,482 --> 00:18:05,118 Uh, about what, sorry? 342 00:18:05,319 --> 00:18:06,484 Like, your dream wedding. 343 00:18:06,486 --> 00:18:08,453 Um... 344 00:18:08,455 --> 00:18:09,655 Like, when you close your eyes, 345 00:18:09,657 --> 00:18:12,692 and you imagine a wedding, 346 00:18:12,694 --> 00:18:13,595 what do you see? 347 00:18:15,429 --> 00:18:16,831 I don't really do that. 348 00:18:17,599 --> 00:18:18,465 Why not? 349 00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:22,837 Uh... this is, a pretty... 350 00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:26,572 intense conversation for a first date. 351 00:18:26,574 --> 00:18:27,809 Right. 352 00:18:28,710 --> 00:18:30,710 No. You're right. I've had too much tequila. 353 00:18:30,712 --> 00:18:31,813 I'm sorry. 354 00:18:34,882 --> 00:18:37,250 Uh... uh, what do you-- what do you see? 355 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,486 The entire thing. 356 00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:43,522 I see a... 357 00:18:43,524 --> 00:18:48,261 I see a big, solemn ceremony, where everybody's crying, 358 00:18:48,428 --> 00:18:50,364 and an even bigger party. 359 00:18:50,832 --> 00:18:52,232 I see... 360 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:56,504 choreographed dances with the entire family. 361 00:18:56,704 --> 00:18:58,370 Everybody that we love is there, 362 00:18:58,372 --> 00:18:59,839 and my husband and I look at each other, 363 00:18:59,841 --> 00:19:01,208 and we think... 364 00:19:05,813 --> 00:19:06,848 ...we want for nothing. 365 00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:21,761 I have made it weird again, haven't I? 366 00:19:21,763 --> 00:19:23,763 -No! -First time, singing at you, 367 00:19:23,765 --> 00:19:25,432 and now I'm telling you about... 368 00:19:25,867 --> 00:19:27,802 -No, you're fine. -...my wedding dreams. 369 00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:29,502 I've made it weird. 370 00:19:29,504 --> 00:19:32,170 No. No, no, no. You're-- you're good. 371 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:35,475 You're, uh... you are-- 372 00:19:35,643 --> 00:19:36,376 you're great. 373 00:19:46,888 --> 00:19:47,655 I should go. 374 00:19:48,321 --> 00:19:49,924 I should, uh... go, 375 00:19:50,490 --> 00:19:52,459 uh, because I have a, um, uh... -Yeah. 376 00:19:52,927 --> 00:19:54,294 ...an early call tomorrow. 377 00:19:55,395 --> 00:19:56,294 Okay. 378 00:19:56,296 --> 00:19:58,432 Yeah, I just-- I have patients, uh... 379 00:19:59,299 --> 00:20:00,966 to save, notes to write. 380 00:20:00,968 --> 00:20:01,867 I need to sleep. 381 00:20:01,869 --> 00:20:02,835 Okay. Right. 382 00:20:02,837 --> 00:20:04,770 Um, sorry. That was abrupt. 383 00:20:04,772 --> 00:20:06,471 That's okay. No, no, no. I get it. 384 00:20:06,473 --> 00:20:08,574 I just... um, lives are at stake. 385 00:20:08,576 --> 00:20:10,275 Uh... 386 00:20:10,277 --> 00:20:11,546 Yeah, could we just get the check? 387 00:20:26,761 --> 00:20:28,493 I had to get here early. 388 00:20:28,495 --> 00:20:29,964 You know how early I have to get here. 389 00:22:04,091 --> 00:22:05,524 So what did you think? 390 00:22:05,526 --> 00:22:06,627 You can be brutal. 391 00:22:08,062 --> 00:22:09,329 It was great. 392 00:22:11,032 --> 00:22:12,066 That's it? 393 00:22:12,432 --> 00:22:14,035 I don't know anything about art. 394 00:22:14,702 --> 00:22:16,836 Everybody has an equal right to art. 395 00:22:16,838 --> 00:22:19,337 Okay. Um... 396 00:22:19,339 --> 00:22:20,340 Tell me what you thought. 397 00:22:21,642 --> 00:22:22,641 That one is my favourite. 398 00:22:22,643 --> 00:22:24,545 Oh, God. 399 00:22:25,046 --> 00:22:26,379 What? 400 00:22:27,548 --> 00:22:29,617 I was really scared to show that one. 401 00:22:31,052 --> 00:22:33,386 It must have been awful, losing them. 402 00:22:38,860 --> 00:22:40,728 You're still not so sure about me. 403 00:22:42,462 --> 00:22:43,698 W-what makes you say that? 404 00:22:48,002 --> 00:22:50,771 The reason I love that photo so much-- 405 00:22:52,372 --> 00:22:53,975 it tells me who you are. 406 00:22:55,910 --> 00:22:58,546 I mean, I could never put myself out there like this. 407 00:23:00,615 --> 00:23:01,983 Is that a tattoo? 408 00:23:02,683 --> 00:23:05,653 Yeah. That's my Ganesh. 409 00:23:06,554 --> 00:23:07,722 You have a scar. 410 00:23:09,422 --> 00:23:10,625 It's kind of a long story. 411 00:24:19,860 --> 00:24:21,727 I signed a new client this week. 412 00:24:21,729 --> 00:24:22,328 Mm. 413 00:24:22,330 --> 00:24:23,798 My fourth this month. 414 00:24:23,965 --> 00:24:25,232 Killing it, babe. 415 00:24:25,933 --> 00:24:28,569 Are you sure you should be taking on more work? 416 00:24:28,769 --> 00:24:29,868 Why wouldn't I? 417 00:24:29,870 --> 00:24:32,173 I don't know, maybe you want to take a vacation. 418 00:24:32,540 --> 00:24:33,741 Vacation? 419 00:24:33,908 --> 00:24:36,041 10 weeks, 12 weeks-- it will help you relax. 420 00:24:36,043 --> 00:24:37,211 More, if you find you like it. 421 00:24:38,546 --> 00:24:39,945 Still not pregnant, Mom. 422 00:24:39,947 --> 00:24:41,747 I don't like your tone, Arundhathi. 423 00:24:41,749 --> 00:24:44,583 How come no one asks Naveen invasive personal questions? 424 00:24:44,585 --> 00:24:45,184 Wha-- 425 00:24:45,186 --> 00:24:46,554 We do! 426 00:24:46,921 --> 00:24:48,587 Great! What's new, Naveen? 427 00:24:48,589 --> 00:24:49,623 Got a boyfriend? 428 00:24:51,225 --> 00:24:52,893 Leave your brother alone. 429 00:24:53,995 --> 00:24:55,863 You are making him uncomfortable. 430 00:25:00,001 --> 00:25:01,934 Sorry. But it's fine 431 00:25:01,936 --> 00:25:04,837 when Mom plays Inspector Gadget in my uterus? 432 00:25:04,839 --> 00:25:06,205 You know what? Just leave it. 433 00:25:10,711 --> 00:25:11,979 How was your visit home? 434 00:25:12,513 --> 00:25:13,114 Good. 435 00:25:14,715 --> 00:25:16,517 Your family seemed well? 436 00:25:16,684 --> 00:25:17,952 Yeah. Good. 437 00:25:19,153 --> 00:25:22,056 Yeah. Um, so, uh, what are your friends like? 438 00:25:22,289 --> 00:25:23,991 Uh, anything I should know? 439 00:25:26,293 --> 00:25:27,393 Oh, no, thank you. 440 00:25:27,395 --> 00:25:29,094 Come on, it's got herbs and spices in it. 441 00:25:29,096 --> 00:25:31,096 Oh. Uh... 442 00:25:31,098 --> 00:25:32,698 Actually, if you can hold this, 443 00:25:32,700 --> 00:25:34,969 that would be so great. Thank you so much. 444 00:25:35,136 --> 00:25:35,936 Oh. 445 00:25:41,208 --> 00:25:41,809 Hi. 446 00:25:41,976 --> 00:25:42,610 Hi! 447 00:25:43,711 --> 00:25:44,745 I'm Billie. 448 00:25:44,945 --> 00:25:47,112 Uh, I remember. We-- we just met. 449 00:25:47,114 --> 00:25:48,981 -Yeah. That's my roommate, Neel. -Hey, babes! 450 00:25:48,983 --> 00:25:50,916 He was supposed to help me set up for the party, 451 00:25:50,918 --> 00:25:54,055 but I did it all myself, because... the patriarchy! 452 00:25:54,255 --> 00:25:55,287 I'm so sorry. 453 00:25:55,289 --> 00:25:56,889 No. It's fine. 454 00:25:56,891 --> 00:25:57,623 Yep. 455 00:25:57,625 --> 00:25:58,859 Jay tells me you're a healer. 456 00:26:00,127 --> 00:26:03,162 Uh... oh, you-- uh, I'm a doctor. 457 00:26:03,164 --> 00:26:04,163 And how-- and you are? 458 00:26:04,165 --> 00:26:05,199 A projectionist. 459 00:26:05,900 --> 00:26:06,700 Okay. 460 00:26:07,668 --> 00:26:08,936 I work at AMC. 461 00:26:09,703 --> 00:26:10,805 I've heard of it. 462 00:26:10,971 --> 00:26:12,171 You're not dancing. 463 00:26:12,173 --> 00:26:15,207 Oh... 464 00:26:15,209 --> 00:26:16,243 Um, I-I'm not a dancer. 465 00:26:16,877 --> 00:26:17,678 We're all dancers. 466 00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:20,279 We are? 467 00:26:20,281 --> 00:26:21,082 Yeah. 468 00:26:21,749 --> 00:26:22,349 Okay. 469 00:26:22,850 --> 00:26:24,085 I think you're perfect. 470 00:26:24,785 --> 00:26:25,953 Uh, thank you. 471 00:26:27,354 --> 00:26:28,923 Just don't break him. 472 00:26:30,791 --> 00:26:32,660 He's more fragile than he seems. 473 00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:33,892 Right. 474 00:26:33,894 --> 00:26:36,764 Okay, I'm not loving the looks of this. 475 00:26:38,365 --> 00:26:39,331 Shall we go dance? 476 00:26:39,333 --> 00:26:41,600 Uh... 477 00:26:41,602 --> 00:26:43,337 Did y-- uh, did you want some... 478 00:26:43,804 --> 00:26:44,772 some carbs? 479 00:26:54,148 --> 00:26:55,349 Oh, my god, I love bread. 480 00:26:55,716 --> 00:26:56,951 Oh, that's so good. 481 00:27:05,826 --> 00:27:07,695 The weed was in the focaccia? 482 00:27:07,862 --> 00:27:09,761 Neel bakes his own pot focaccia. 483 00:27:09,763 --> 00:27:10,798 He should have told you. 484 00:27:10,965 --> 00:27:12,166 I had four of them. 485 00:27:13,367 --> 00:27:15,236 I'm starting to feel it too. 486 00:27:16,403 --> 00:27:18,672 Ohh... 487 00:27:19,874 --> 00:27:23,144 Whaa... I... wh... 488 00:27:24,278 --> 00:27:25,112 What? 489 00:27:25,279 --> 00:27:26,011 I... I... 490 00:27:26,013 --> 00:27:28,981 Yeah, uh... 491 00:27:35,089 --> 00:27:36,989 - I... - Yeah? 492 00:27:36,991 --> 00:27:38,392 Feel... 493 00:27:39,793 --> 00:27:40,794 I know. 494 00:27:42,363 --> 00:27:43,130 Good. 495 00:28:16,864 --> 00:28:17,462 Take it away. 496 00:28:17,464 --> 00:28:18,598 Mom? Dad? 497 00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:21,099 Actually, you guys, so funny you ask, 498 00:28:21,101 --> 00:28:23,037 because I am seeing someone. 499 00:28:24,271 --> 00:28:26,271 You know how things always get super weird 500 00:28:26,273 --> 00:28:28,707 whenever anything gay comes up? 501 00:28:28,709 --> 00:28:30,342 Well, I just thought I'd put everyone at ease 502 00:28:30,344 --> 00:28:33,045 by mentioning my white, Hindu, orphan, artist boyfriend. 503 00:28:35,816 --> 00:28:36,982 Mom? Dad? 504 00:28:36,984 --> 00:28:39,284 Do you want another son... who's white? 505 00:28:39,286 --> 00:28:42,823 You know, someone with an unflinching gaze 506 00:28:42,990 --> 00:28:45,159 who sees all of me? 507 00:28:45,392 --> 00:28:46,593 Mom! 508 00:28:46,595 --> 00:28:47,926 Do you remember those condoms you bought me? 509 00:28:47,928 --> 00:28:50,495 I'm gonna use them now, because I'm seeing someone. 510 00:28:59,306 --> 00:29:01,240 Mom, you know how you were saying 511 00:29:01,242 --> 00:29:03,375 that there was a lot of hair in my bathroom? 512 00:29:03,377 --> 00:29:06,146 It's because there's another man living with me now. 513 00:29:09,383 --> 00:29:10,849 Oh... 514 00:29:10,851 --> 00:29:12,017 You guys, 515 00:29:12,019 --> 00:29:13,919 you know how much you love getting your photo taken? 516 00:29:13,921 --> 00:29:16,188 Well, I'm dating a white photographer now. 517 00:29:16,190 --> 00:29:17,024 "Cheese." 518 00:29:17,992 --> 00:29:19,358 Get out your Beyonce. 519 00:29:19,360 --> 00:29:20,526 I need the wind machine. 520 00:29:22,196 --> 00:29:24,029 Don't let them talk over you. 521 00:29:24,031 --> 00:29:25,998 When are you going to appreciate Manish? 522 00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:27,299 Such a good guy! 523 00:29:27,301 --> 00:29:28,967 -I do appreciate Manish. -He is not-- 524 00:29:28,969 --> 00:29:30,769 The power of love inside you... 525 00:29:30,771 --> 00:29:31,837 let it out. 526 00:29:31,839 --> 00:29:33,972 All your eggs are going to get dried up. 527 00:29:33,974 --> 00:29:35,007 So be it. 528 00:29:35,009 --> 00:29:39,011 You've got this. You've got this. 529 00:29:40,314 --> 00:29:41,413 You got this. 530 00:29:57,031 --> 00:29:59,033 Mom, Dad... 531 00:29:59,366 --> 00:30:01,033 do you ever feel 532 00:30:01,035 --> 00:30:03,237 like Kajol in a field of yellow flowers 533 00:30:03,804 --> 00:30:07,908 hearing a cowbell and just knowing... 534 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:13,515 Naveen! 535 00:30:15,349 --> 00:30:16,350 Uh, Manish! 536 00:30:17,384 --> 00:30:18,952 Um... 537 00:30:20,220 --> 00:30:24,191 Sorry, we're running late for-- for, uh, for, um... 538 00:30:24,425 --> 00:30:25,257 this thing. 539 00:30:25,259 --> 00:30:26,960 Uh, where's Arundhathi? 540 00:30:27,127 --> 00:30:29,863 Um... I don't know. 541 00:30:31,165 --> 00:30:31,965 I-I'm sorry. 542 00:30:32,132 --> 00:30:33,834 Oh! Um... 543 00:30:34,501 --> 00:30:36,437 This is, uh... uh... 544 00:30:37,171 --> 00:30:37,971 Jay. 545 00:30:38,138 --> 00:30:39,273 Jay. Wow. 546 00:30:39,873 --> 00:30:40,974 Hey, that's... 547 00:30:43,110 --> 00:30:44,011 Good for you, Naveen. 548 00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:48,449 Just, um, be well, okay? 549 00:30:50,384 --> 00:30:51,551 It was nice to meet you, Jay. 550 00:30:51,553 --> 00:30:52,353 Bye. 551 00:31:10,137 --> 00:31:12,572 It's not about you. I-I just-- 552 00:31:12,574 --> 00:31:14,906 I just like to keep my family out of my personal life. 553 00:31:17,512 --> 00:31:19,978 I know it's-- it's crazy, 554 00:31:19,980 --> 00:31:22,950 but I've never introduced them to a boyfriend before, 555 00:31:23,450 --> 00:31:26,485 and, honestly, if you met them, you'd understand. 556 00:31:26,487 --> 00:31:28,021 "If"? 557 00:31:30,658 --> 00:31:33,291 Um, so, after dinner, he walks me to my door, 558 00:31:33,293 --> 00:31:35,193 and it's, like, moonlight, 559 00:31:35,195 --> 00:31:36,997 it's all really romantic, 560 00:31:37,164 --> 00:31:39,231 and then he, like, presses me up against the door, 561 00:31:39,233 --> 00:31:40,399 and he leans in, 562 00:31:40,401 --> 00:31:43,170 and I'm like, "Okay, first kiss--" 563 00:31:43,337 --> 00:31:44,672 so I'm like puckering up... 564 00:31:46,006 --> 00:31:47,341 then he robbed me. 565 00:31:48,976 --> 00:31:51,076 And then he pulled out his gun and showed it to me, 566 00:31:51,078 --> 00:31:52,978 and it was like, "Whoa!" 567 00:31:52,980 --> 00:31:54,246 -Whoa. -"I gotta get out of here." 568 00:31:54,248 --> 00:31:55,681 -Yeah. -Anyways... 569 00:31:55,683 --> 00:31:57,418 enough about me, sorry. 570 00:31:58,385 --> 00:31:59,654 So, what about you two? 571 00:32:00,254 --> 00:32:02,256 Uh, sorry. What about us? 572 00:32:02,624 --> 00:32:04,124 How did you two meet? 573 00:32:04,324 --> 00:32:05,660 I love a love story. 574 00:32:06,193 --> 00:32:08,495 Uh, he took my picture in the hospital. 575 00:32:16,437 --> 00:32:19,004 So... um... 576 00:32:19,006 --> 00:32:21,339 do you doctors get annoyed when, 577 00:32:21,341 --> 00:32:24,109 you know, people ask you for free medical advice? 578 00:32:24,111 --> 00:32:25,010 Yes. 579 00:32:25,012 --> 00:32:26,346 You don't have to change the subject. 580 00:32:28,550 --> 00:32:29,414 I took his picture, 581 00:32:29,416 --> 00:32:31,385 then we started dating seriously... 582 00:32:31,619 --> 00:32:33,922 ...and then... 583 00:32:34,522 --> 00:32:36,221 he didn't tell his family about me, 584 00:32:36,223 --> 00:32:37,692 so it's kind of like I don't exist. 585 00:32:39,393 --> 00:32:40,360 Jay, is this... 586 00:32:41,295 --> 00:32:42,294 Are they fighting? 587 00:32:42,296 --> 00:32:44,697 We're-- we're not, uh-- We're not fighting. 588 00:32:44,699 --> 00:32:46,701 Because you never say what you feel. 589 00:32:47,334 --> 00:32:48,133 Jay. 590 00:32:48,135 --> 00:32:48,967 But I do, 591 00:32:48,969 --> 00:32:51,102 and I get that families are tough. 592 00:32:51,104 --> 00:32:52,507 I mean, I get that, but... 593 00:32:54,408 --> 00:32:56,276 I kind of thought that this was... 594 00:32:57,344 --> 00:32:58,445 Sorry. I don't know. 595 00:33:00,180 --> 00:33:01,046 I know-- 596 00:33:01,048 --> 00:33:03,014 I made you a part of my family. 597 00:33:03,016 --> 00:33:05,986 I always hoped that, one day, you'd make me a part of yours. 598 00:33:06,186 --> 00:33:08,119 I want that. You know that. 599 00:33:08,121 --> 00:33:09,354 Well, you've never said it. 600 00:33:09,356 --> 00:33:11,091 -Said what? -Said what you want! 601 00:33:17,130 --> 00:33:18,733 -Really, we could give y-- -No, it's fine. 602 00:33:24,171 --> 00:33:26,240 I... 603 00:33:27,542 --> 00:33:29,109 the big wedding... 604 00:33:31,411 --> 00:33:33,347 I want that too. 605 00:33:36,116 --> 00:33:37,617 The baraat, 606 00:33:37,619 --> 00:33:39,419 the fire, 607 00:33:39,587 --> 00:33:41,253 the... pandit, 608 00:33:41,255 --> 00:33:43,421 the seven circles, 609 00:33:43,423 --> 00:33:46,260 a party with all of the people we love. 610 00:33:49,129 --> 00:33:50,464 "We want for nothing." 611 00:33:53,033 --> 00:33:54,268 I want that. 612 00:33:56,203 --> 00:33:57,170 I do. 613 00:33:59,239 --> 00:34:00,708 Of course I do. 614 00:34:06,146 --> 00:34:08,115 I want the same thing. 615 00:34:11,184 --> 00:34:15,023 The same thing... with you. 616 00:34:26,066 --> 00:34:27,134 Does that mean-- 617 00:34:29,136 --> 00:34:29,737 What? 618 00:34:31,271 --> 00:34:32,540 I mean... 619 00:34:33,273 --> 00:34:35,475 it feels like you're saying that you want to-- 620 00:34:44,752 --> 00:34:45,551 Yes. 621 00:34:45,553 --> 00:34:47,352 Yes. 622 00:34:47,354 --> 00:34:47,954 A betrothal. 623 00:34:47,956 --> 00:34:49,287 Okay, no more arguments, 624 00:34:49,289 --> 00:34:50,825 or Naveen's gonna end up pregnant. 625 00:34:55,563 --> 00:34:56,494 Love wins! 626 00:35:18,620 --> 00:35:19,654 Hi, Beta! 627 00:35:19,821 --> 00:35:21,089 Hey! 628 00:35:21,421 --> 00:35:24,824 Hey, uh, ahem, hey, uh, is-is Mom there? 629 00:35:24,826 --> 00:35:26,426 She's taking a nap. 630 00:35:26,828 --> 00:35:29,864 Oh. Cool. Um... 631 00:35:31,666 --> 00:35:32,031 I-- I was wondering if I could bring someone along tomorrow. 632 00:35:32,033 --> 00:35:32,366 What? 633 00:35:34,736 --> 00:35:36,504 Hello? Hello! 634 00:35:36,671 --> 00:35:37,302 Hi. Hi. 635 00:35:37,304 --> 00:35:38,804 I can't hear you, Beta! 636 00:35:38,806 --> 00:35:39,872 -I was-- I was j-- -Hello? 637 00:35:39,874 --> 00:35:41,306 I'm saying that I'm gonna brin-- 638 00:35:41,308 --> 00:35:42,273 The connection dropped! 639 00:35:42,275 --> 00:35:43,441 Okay, yeah, no, I'm saying 640 00:35:43,443 --> 00:35:45,312 I'm gonna bring someone along tomorrow. 641 00:35:45,479 --> 00:35:46,346 Who is it? 642 00:35:47,749 --> 00:35:50,250 It's a guy... I'm seeing. 643 00:35:51,886 --> 00:35:52,687 Uh... 644 00:35:55,322 --> 00:35:56,691 Is he a doctor too? 645 00:35:56,858 --> 00:35:58,626 No. Uh, no. 646 00:35:58,893 --> 00:36:01,159 Uh, actually, we met at the... temple. 647 00:36:01,161 --> 00:36:03,196 Ah! Ha! That's nice. 648 00:36:03,731 --> 00:36:05,198 Yeah. Uh, I should say-- 649 00:36:05,365 --> 00:36:06,565 Okay, then! Speak soon. 650 00:36:06,567 --> 00:36:10,235 No, um, I-I was just gonna... um, okay. 651 00:36:10,237 --> 00:36:12,372 Oh, no, no, no, no. We'll just see you tomorrow. 652 00:36:12,674 --> 00:36:13,841 Okay. I'll-I'll-I'll-- 653 00:36:14,207 --> 00:36:15,041 Okay, bye! 654 00:36:15,043 --> 00:36:16,678 I'll t-talk to you then. Okay. Bye. 655 00:36:23,951 --> 00:36:25,620 That was not the plan. 656 00:36:28,455 --> 00:36:29,222 You nervous? 657 00:36:29,423 --> 00:36:30,223 Hmm? 658 00:36:30,424 --> 00:36:31,224 Are you nervous? 659 00:36:31,425 --> 00:36:32,225 No. You? 660 00:36:33,393 --> 00:36:34,192 No. 661 00:36:38,198 --> 00:36:38,800 Hey! Relax. 662 00:36:39,266 --> 00:36:40,400 I am relaxed. 663 00:36:40,768 --> 00:36:42,400 Do you think I should touch their feet? 664 00:36:42,402 --> 00:36:43,836 I've never been to their house before. 665 00:36:43,838 --> 00:36:44,804 I think it would be weird. 666 00:36:44,806 --> 00:36:47,508 Should we watch some OutTV while we wait? 667 00:36:47,675 --> 00:36:50,210 Watching OutTV is not going to help us, Jaan. 668 00:36:50,410 --> 00:36:51,342 It's just that I don't know 669 00:36:51,344 --> 00:36:53,748 what the protocol is in this situation. 670 00:36:53,915 --> 00:36:56,949 My parents are super liberal for Indians. 671 00:36:56,951 --> 00:36:58,984 Just, um, don't bring up drinking, 672 00:36:58,986 --> 00:37:01,856 or meat, or sex, or drugs. 673 00:37:02,255 --> 00:37:04,890 And obviously, no displays of physical affection 674 00:37:04,892 --> 00:37:06,961 or open declarations of love. 675 00:37:08,629 --> 00:37:10,263 What do you want me to say? 676 00:37:10,430 --> 00:37:12,565 Just be nice! Can you be nice? 677 00:37:12,567 --> 00:37:13,666 Why you getting angry? 678 00:37:13,668 --> 00:37:14,834 I'm not getting angry! 679 00:37:14,836 --> 00:37:16,569 Do I look angry? -Yes. 680 00:37:16,571 --> 00:37:19,672 A-and just be yourself, but, you know, like... 681 00:37:19,674 --> 00:37:21,008 a little bit more formal. 682 00:37:21,374 --> 00:37:24,375 Like you're interviewing for, like, the presidency. 683 00:37:24,377 --> 00:37:26,413 Um... 684 00:37:28,482 --> 00:37:29,915 At least this boy is Indian. 685 00:37:39,694 --> 00:37:41,259 Uh, Mom, uh, Dad, 686 00:37:41,261 --> 00:37:42,528 this is-- 687 00:37:42,530 --> 00:37:43,562 Jay Kurundkar. 688 00:37:43,564 --> 00:37:44,866 It's really nice to meet you. 689 00:37:49,302 --> 00:37:50,037 Oh, God. 690 00:37:51,973 --> 00:37:53,606 Oh! No, no! It's okay. 691 00:37:53,608 --> 00:37:55,676 It's okay, it's okay. Bless you. 692 00:37:58,345 --> 00:37:59,647 Did he just touch your feet? 693 00:38:02,784 --> 00:38:04,351 A bitch need some warmth at night, 694 00:38:04,519 --> 00:38:07,553 and it's nothin' but a nice, sexy dick, Daddy, 695 00:38:07,555 --> 00:38:08,923 to keep a bitch warm. 696 00:38:09,456 --> 00:38:12,660 Um, I'm sorry, the things I said earlier-- 697 00:38:13,460 --> 00:38:15,763 We played this gay TV for you. 698 00:38:16,429 --> 00:38:20,733 My parents really like watching gay channels 699 00:38:20,735 --> 00:38:23,671 so that they can try to understand me better. 700 00:38:25,338 --> 00:38:27,775 Sometimes you don't have to be a fairytale prince. 701 00:38:28,441 --> 00:38:30,077 Sometimes you can just be 702 00:38:30,443 --> 00:38:31,979 that 5'5" Italian guy from New Jersey. 703 00:38:32,345 --> 00:38:35,516 It's crazy, but that twink came into the hospital. 704 00:38:36,017 --> 00:38:37,618 I was so starstruck. 705 00:38:38,519 --> 00:38:39,319 Wow. 706 00:38:39,554 --> 00:38:40,152 Yeah. 707 00:38:40,154 --> 00:38:42,523 He-- he didn't make it. 708 00:38:45,425 --> 00:38:47,358 Why are you having a heart attack? 709 00:38:47,360 --> 00:38:49,028 You would've had a heart attack if I did this. 710 00:38:49,030 --> 00:38:50,095 No. No such thing. 711 00:38:50,097 --> 00:38:52,499 We are the most open-minded parents. 712 00:38:52,667 --> 00:38:53,766 That is insane. 713 00:38:53,768 --> 00:38:55,501 You would've never let me do this. 714 00:38:55,503 --> 00:38:56,769 You know, your attitude... 715 00:38:56,771 --> 00:38:58,671 Your brother is happy. -Such a double standard. 716 00:38:58,673 --> 00:38:59,605 Naveen! Naveen? 717 00:38:59,607 --> 00:39:00,639 Uh, yeah, coming. I'll be right back. 718 00:39:00,641 --> 00:39:02,107 Uh, yeah, coming, coming, coming. 719 00:39:02,109 --> 00:39:03,711 Uh, yes? 720 00:39:03,978 --> 00:39:07,012 Do you know if your friend will take sugar in the chai? 721 00:39:07,014 --> 00:39:08,479 -Uh, yeah, I think so. -Okay. 722 00:39:08,481 --> 00:39:09,447 Make sure to ask 723 00:39:09,449 --> 00:39:11,449 if he wants white sugar or brown sugar. 724 00:39:11,451 --> 00:39:12,518 He seems a little confused. 725 00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:13,586 Oh, that's very clever. 726 00:39:13,588 --> 00:39:15,321 Oh, my god, I'm just saying, that's a surprise. 727 00:39:15,323 --> 00:39:17,022 What, that he's white? Didn't Manish tell you? 728 00:39:17,024 --> 00:39:18,090 How would Manish know? 729 00:39:18,092 --> 00:39:19,959 We ran into him. Wait, he didn't say? 730 00:39:19,961 --> 00:39:20,693 No. 731 00:39:20,695 --> 00:39:21,929 Then why were you calling me? 732 00:39:22,362 --> 00:39:23,496 Doesn't matter. 733 00:39:33,574 --> 00:39:34,374 I... 734 00:39:35,977 --> 00:39:36,811 love the photo. 735 00:39:37,377 --> 00:39:38,409 Thank you. 736 00:39:38,411 --> 00:39:40,147 Yeah. All the Indians do it. 737 00:39:40,581 --> 00:39:43,115 It's so great-- creating a family of your own. 738 00:39:43,117 --> 00:39:47,088 Well, isn't that just why we're all alive? 739 00:39:47,622 --> 00:39:49,090 So, Jay, where are you from? 740 00:39:49,456 --> 00:39:51,125 Long story-- kind of all over. 741 00:39:51,491 --> 00:39:53,458 It took me a while to figure out where I belonged. 742 00:39:53,460 --> 00:39:54,627 It turns out, it was here. 743 00:39:55,696 --> 00:39:56,998 My parents' house? 744 00:39:57,497 --> 00:39:58,097 -Tsk! -No. 745 00:39:58,099 --> 00:39:59,634 Well, I meant the city, 746 00:39:59,834 --> 00:40:02,034 but this-this, uh, this house is great too. 747 00:40:02,036 --> 00:40:04,605 So, sorry, where's your family? 748 00:40:04,772 --> 00:40:06,505 -Arundhathi... -What? I'm taking an interest. 749 00:40:06,507 --> 00:40:07,106 It's okay. 750 00:40:09,610 --> 00:40:12,680 My parents both passed away a few years ago. 751 00:40:13,413 --> 00:40:14,813 I'm-- I'm so sorry. 752 00:40:14,815 --> 00:40:15,848 That's awful. 753 00:40:15,850 --> 00:40:18,886 No! I mean, it was awful that they died, but... 754 00:40:20,054 --> 00:40:22,187 they were older when they adopted me, 755 00:40:22,189 --> 00:40:23,791 so it was not a, you know... 756 00:40:24,191 --> 00:40:27,028 That makes so much sense... 757 00:40:28,129 --> 00:40:29,795 and is one of the many things 758 00:40:29,797 --> 00:40:32,097 that would have been nice to know about you 759 00:40:32,099 --> 00:40:33,601 before I made an ass of myself. 760 00:40:33,768 --> 00:40:35,935 -Sorry? -Nothing. 761 00:40:35,937 --> 00:40:38,471 Naveen didn't tell us that you were white. 762 00:40:38,639 --> 00:40:39,271 Archit! 763 00:40:39,273 --> 00:40:40,839 -Really? -Dad, do you... 764 00:40:40,841 --> 00:40:43,642 um, do you really think that-that's important? 765 00:40:43,644 --> 00:40:45,744 We think it's wonderful that you're white. 766 00:40:45,746 --> 00:40:46,779 Oh, my god. 767 00:40:46,781 --> 00:40:47,947 -Seriously? -What? 768 00:40:47,949 --> 00:40:49,480 No, I'm just glad our mother 769 00:40:49,482 --> 00:40:52,084 is being so wonderful and liberal, 770 00:40:52,086 --> 00:40:53,619 and an open-minded soul, 771 00:40:53,621 --> 00:40:56,655 welcoming my brother's new lover. 772 00:40:56,657 --> 00:40:58,857 No, we can just say "boyfriend." 773 00:40:58,859 --> 00:40:59,892 We don't have to say... 774 00:40:59,894 --> 00:41:03,095 It's j-- it's j... 775 00:41:03,097 --> 00:41:03,929 It's "boyfriend." 776 00:41:03,931 --> 00:41:05,931 Welcome into our home. 777 00:41:05,933 --> 00:41:07,465 Wow! Oh, my god. 778 00:41:07,467 --> 00:41:09,136 Let's just start planning the wedding now. 779 00:41:12,039 --> 00:41:12,938 I was kidding. 780 00:41:12,940 --> 00:41:14,974 What, are you engaged or something? 781 00:41:14,976 --> 00:41:16,177 No! Uh... 782 00:41:16,811 --> 00:41:18,978 Well, uh, well, uh, I mean, we've just, uh, 783 00:41:18,980 --> 00:41:20,982 we've just talked about it, that's... 784 00:41:21,182 --> 00:41:23,048 -Oh... my. -Wow! 785 00:41:23,050 --> 00:41:25,117 Can you point me to the bathroom? 786 00:41:25,119 --> 00:41:26,921 Yep. Uh, please go straight. 787 00:41:29,523 --> 00:41:30,157 To your right. 788 00:41:54,548 --> 00:41:55,414 For-- for real? 789 00:41:55,416 --> 00:41:58,117 No. I obviously wouldn't get engaged 790 00:41:58,119 --> 00:41:59,620 before a family meeting. 791 00:42:04,125 --> 00:42:06,794 Oh, my god, oh, my god, oh, my god, oh, my god. 792 00:42:07,194 --> 00:42:09,028 We're just trying to catch up. 793 00:42:09,030 --> 00:42:10,729 This is psychotic! 794 00:42:10,731 --> 00:42:12,564 I-If I were to get engaged 795 00:42:12,566 --> 00:42:15,100 to some tatted-up white dude before you even met him, 796 00:42:15,102 --> 00:42:16,835 you would have thrown me out of the house! 797 00:42:16,837 --> 00:42:19,071 -Keep your voice down! -This is so damn unfair! 798 00:42:19,073 --> 00:42:20,639 Where were you guys eight years ago? 799 00:42:20,641 --> 00:42:21,673 What do you mean? 800 00:42:21,675 --> 00:42:22,843 Yeah, what does that mean? 801 00:42:23,878 --> 00:42:26,311 Nothing. Excuse me. 802 00:42:26,313 --> 00:42:28,047 Where are you going? 803 00:42:28,049 --> 00:42:28,849 Hey! 804 00:42:33,154 --> 00:42:36,655 -Oh. -Oh, I'm sorry. 805 00:42:36,657 --> 00:42:38,657 Hey, Naveen, what was that on his arm? 806 00:42:38,659 --> 00:42:39,391 Sorry. 807 00:42:39,393 --> 00:42:40,594 It's a tattoo of, uh, Ganesh. 808 00:42:41,262 --> 00:42:42,628 Our Ganesh Bhagvan? 809 00:42:42,630 --> 00:42:45,064 -Yeah. -Yeah. -He did that for you? 810 00:42:45,066 --> 00:42:46,231 -What? -He did it for us? 811 00:42:46,233 --> 00:42:47,766 Why would you think-- 812 00:42:47,768 --> 00:42:49,268 Oh, Jay! Come, come. Come. 813 00:42:49,270 --> 00:42:51,005 Have a seat. Have a seat. 814 00:42:58,779 --> 00:43:01,148 So, Jay... what do you do? 815 00:43:01,315 --> 00:43:02,616 I'm a freelance photographer. 816 00:43:02,783 --> 00:43:03,717 No! For a living. 817 00:43:09,123 --> 00:43:10,689 Guys... 818 00:43:10,691 --> 00:43:11,926 Dad? 819 00:43:16,730 --> 00:43:17,631 Jay speaks Hindi! 820 00:43:19,934 --> 00:43:20,899 Uh... 821 00:43:20,901 --> 00:43:23,969 so something really, really fun about Jay 822 00:43:23,971 --> 00:43:25,840 is that he can speak Hindi. 823 00:43:26,006 --> 00:43:27,975 I understand better than I speak. 824 00:43:29,143 --> 00:43:30,945 Jay, would you like to stay for dinner? 825 00:43:52,666 --> 00:43:54,135 Weed! 826 00:43:55,269 --> 00:43:56,137 Queer... 827 00:43:57,071 --> 00:43:58,172 art... 828 00:43:58,405 --> 00:44:02,341 -Uh... -...is really my, um, passion. 829 00:44:02,343 --> 00:44:05,043 Normal art is queer art. 830 00:44:05,045 --> 00:44:06,044 Yeah, it's all... 831 00:44:06,046 --> 00:44:07,982 I mean, I guess everything is kind of queer. 832 00:44:08,149 --> 00:44:10,716 Yeah, it's commercial-- commercial, financial. 833 00:44:10,718 --> 00:44:12,186 Yeah. And, uh... 834 00:44:12,720 --> 00:44:13,586 Robert Mapplethorpe, 835 00:44:13,588 --> 00:44:15,320 I don't know if you've heard of him? 836 00:44:15,322 --> 00:44:16,257 He's, um... 837 00:44:16,423 --> 00:44:18,290 Yeah, there's this great book, 838 00:44:18,292 --> 00:44:19,124 it's called-- 839 00:44:19,126 --> 00:44:20,792 Come, come, Chumki, come! 840 00:44:20,794 --> 00:44:22,229 Jay is staying for dinner. 841 00:44:22,930 --> 00:44:23,731 Good. 842 00:44:24,665 --> 00:44:27,201 I'm... sure he's hungry. 843 00:44:30,271 --> 00:44:31,705 What are you doing? 844 00:44:31,872 --> 00:44:32,671 Nothing. 845 00:44:32,673 --> 00:44:35,908 Ooh, Mom... 846 00:44:35,910 --> 00:44:38,345 you might not want to go in the bathroom for a little while. 847 00:44:38,712 --> 00:44:41,180 Why? What? Jay, are you not feeling well? 848 00:44:41,182 --> 00:44:42,950 I think we are out of Imodium. 849 00:44:43,150 --> 00:44:46,051 I'm so sorry. It shouldn't leave an odor. 850 00:44:46,053 --> 00:44:47,419 -Mm. -Well, that's not my experience. 851 00:44:47,421 --> 00:44:50,124 Is this a new thing of yours too? 852 00:44:50,291 --> 00:44:52,291 Do you partake? 853 00:44:52,293 --> 00:44:53,058 Arundhathi! 854 00:44:53,060 --> 00:44:54,293 What are you two talking about? 855 00:44:54,295 --> 00:44:55,093 I'm so sorry. 856 00:44:55,095 --> 00:44:55,761 -Pot, Mom! -What? 857 00:44:55,763 --> 00:44:57,198 Yeah, he was smoking pot. 858 00:44:58,232 --> 00:45:00,267 I found the cartridge in the trash. 859 00:45:01,135 --> 00:45:02,234 -My towels! -Ganja? 860 00:45:02,236 --> 00:45:04,736 I'm sorry, I was trying to say that it's a vape, 861 00:45:04,738 --> 00:45:05,971 so it shouldn't leave a smell. 862 00:45:05,973 --> 00:45:07,308 I can show you-- -Not now! 863 00:45:09,810 --> 00:45:11,376 Um, uh, Jay, uh... doesn't usually do this. 864 00:45:11,378 --> 00:45:14,315 Well... that's not true. 865 00:45:14,715 --> 00:45:16,315 Could you not, for a second? 866 00:45:16,317 --> 00:45:17,983 I'm sorry, I just feel like your policy 867 00:45:17,985 --> 00:45:19,284 of lying to them about everything 868 00:45:19,286 --> 00:45:20,719 isn't really working out. 869 00:45:20,721 --> 00:45:22,087 Mm, he does has a point. 870 00:45:22,089 --> 00:45:23,155 Would you shut the fuck up? 871 00:45:23,157 --> 00:45:24,122 -Naveen! -I should go. 872 00:45:24,124 --> 00:45:25,357 No, not now. 873 00:45:25,359 --> 00:45:26,391 You leaving so soon? 874 00:45:26,393 --> 00:45:27,428 Uncle, Auntie, 875 00:45:28,195 --> 00:45:30,064 thank you for your hospitality. 876 00:45:30,397 --> 00:45:32,731 Jay. Jay! Hang on. 877 00:45:42,876 --> 00:45:43,978 Jay, wait! 878 00:45:45,312 --> 00:45:47,012 Jay, where are you going? 879 00:45:47,014 --> 00:45:48,449 Naveen, you should be with your family. 880 00:45:50,150 --> 00:45:50,951 Jay! 881 00:46:10,137 --> 00:46:12,271 I can't believe you just did that. 882 00:46:12,273 --> 00:46:14,273 Me? You're blaming me? 883 00:46:14,275 --> 00:46:16,208 After that ridiculous show you just put on? 884 00:46:16,210 --> 00:46:18,379 Oh, okay. That's ridiculous. 885 00:46:18,546 --> 00:46:20,212 Fine, you must as well just call me a fag. 886 00:46:20,214 --> 00:46:21,046 It'll be faster. 887 00:46:21,048 --> 00:46:21,813 Screw you. 888 00:46:21,815 --> 00:46:23,982 Hey, your sister is not bigot. 889 00:46:23,984 --> 00:46:25,984 Oh, oh! That's rich. 890 00:46:25,986 --> 00:46:27,119 What's that supposed to mean? 891 00:46:27,121 --> 00:46:28,153 It means, Dad, 892 00:46:28,155 --> 00:46:30,889 that you won't say what actually bothers you 893 00:46:30,891 --> 00:46:32,259 about this whole situation, 894 00:46:32,426 --> 00:46:34,828 because me being gay makes you uncomfortable. 895 00:46:39,199 --> 00:46:40,568 I love him. 896 00:46:43,837 --> 00:46:45,339 He makes me happy. 897 00:46:48,409 --> 00:46:49,910 Isn't that all that matters? 898 00:46:54,348 --> 00:46:57,182 Since when does that matter to anyone in this house? 899 00:46:57,184 --> 00:46:58,385 Excuse me? 900 00:46:58,586 --> 00:47:01,153 Seriously, what is going on with you today? 901 00:47:02,122 --> 00:47:03,290 Is it hormones? 902 00:47:03,457 --> 00:47:05,525 Archit! Get her a support pillow! 903 00:47:05,527 --> 00:47:07,459 We don't have a support pillow. 904 00:47:07,461 --> 00:47:11,198 I can't believe you picked today to drop this. 905 00:47:12,866 --> 00:47:14,499 What is that supposed to mean? 906 00:47:14,501 --> 00:47:17,269 That you hate when it's not all about you, 907 00:47:17,271 --> 00:47:19,574 and your perfect house and your perfect husband-- 908 00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:21,206 My life is not perfect! 909 00:47:21,208 --> 00:47:22,240 Oh, did you ever think 910 00:47:22,242 --> 00:47:24,111 that maybe I just want a family, just like you? 911 00:47:24,278 --> 00:47:25,846 For fuck's sake, I'm not pregnant! 912 00:47:26,013 --> 00:47:26,614 I'm leaving Manish! 913 00:47:27,381 --> 00:47:28,182 What? 914 00:47:32,219 --> 00:47:33,253 I'm getting divorced. 915 00:47:43,931 --> 00:47:44,498 Arundhathi, I... 916 00:47:45,065 --> 00:47:46,066 You know... 917 00:47:47,034 --> 00:47:48,369 you could've answered my call. 918 00:48:02,182 --> 00:48:03,585 What are you doing? 919 00:48:06,887 --> 00:48:08,255 I can't find my saffron. 920 00:48:08,623 --> 00:48:09,990 You're packing? 921 00:48:10,625 --> 00:48:13,091 That seems a bit dramatic, don't you think? 922 00:48:13,093 --> 00:48:14,395 I'm not being dramatic. 923 00:48:14,596 --> 00:48:17,095 Oh, right, because you're typically very grounded. 924 00:48:18,899 --> 00:48:20,401 This was always a bad idea. 925 00:48:21,034 --> 00:48:22,134 What does that mean? 926 00:48:22,136 --> 00:48:23,468 I should have known from the start. 927 00:48:23,470 --> 00:48:25,540 I saw you... 928 00:48:26,006 --> 00:48:28,275 the way that you squirmed when I started singing. 929 00:48:28,976 --> 00:48:29,943 I should've known then. 930 00:48:31,311 --> 00:48:32,346 Known what? 931 00:48:33,947 --> 00:48:35,382 That you're ashamed of me. 932 00:48:36,651 --> 00:48:38,152 Ashamed of yourself, actually. 933 00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:40,387 I'm not ashamed of myself. 934 00:48:41,321 --> 00:48:42,087 Naveen... 935 00:48:42,089 --> 00:48:43,689 you move through public spaces 936 00:48:43,691 --> 00:48:45,959 like your existence is an inconvenience, 937 00:48:46,427 --> 00:48:47,459 and you're very sorry 938 00:48:47,461 --> 00:48:50,130 to have caused anyone to notice you at all. 939 00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:54,435 There it is. 940 00:48:55,235 --> 00:48:57,068 Oh, yeah, wouldn't want to leave that behind. 941 00:48:57,070 --> 00:48:58,506 You know how much saffron costs? 942 00:48:58,972 --> 00:49:00,506 No, Jay. I don't. 943 00:49:02,242 --> 00:49:04,646 You know how I got that scar from my foster dad? 944 00:49:05,547 --> 00:49:07,615 He found me playing with my mom's shoes. 945 00:49:11,985 --> 00:49:13,553 I've been rejected by enough families 946 00:49:13,555 --> 00:49:15,355 to know when it's time to move on. 947 00:49:18,058 --> 00:49:19,527 Jay... 948 00:49:20,494 --> 00:49:23,228 if you think I'm going to make some big speech to stop you, 949 00:49:23,230 --> 00:49:24,031 then you're wrong. 950 00:49:27,434 --> 00:49:28,335 I know. 951 00:49:31,305 --> 00:49:32,473 I'm the dramatic one. 952 00:50:23,423 --> 00:50:25,257 All right, while you were wifed up, 953 00:50:25,259 --> 00:50:27,259 I was out there, playing the game, 954 00:50:27,261 --> 00:50:30,161 and let me tell you, sweetie, the game has changed. 955 00:50:30,163 --> 00:50:31,196 Little soon for that. 956 00:50:31,198 --> 00:50:33,766 We're still off carbs, but dairy's cool again. 957 00:50:33,768 --> 00:50:36,736 "No" to apps, but "yes" to sex parties. 958 00:50:36,738 --> 00:50:38,270 -Yeah. I-- -No running! 959 00:50:38,272 --> 00:50:40,405 Gays don't run, but we're allowed to skip. 960 00:50:40,407 --> 00:50:41,807 You know what's out? Big dicks. 961 00:50:41,809 --> 00:50:43,743 Big dicks were totally '90s. 962 00:50:43,745 --> 00:50:45,176 Paul, we're at the hospital. 963 00:50:45,178 --> 00:50:47,582 We're into tiny little modest dicks now. 964 00:50:47,749 --> 00:50:50,284 Um, back on cord phones. 965 00:50:50,450 --> 00:50:52,150 You know? We're back on this thing. 966 00:50:52,152 --> 00:50:54,388 We're twirling the cord, twirling the cord, twirling th-- 967 00:50:56,056 --> 00:50:57,424 What? 968 00:50:58,325 --> 00:51:01,495 Just Jay letting me know he left his keys under the mat. 969 00:51:04,566 --> 00:51:06,666 Okay, we're definitely going out tonight. 970 00:51:06,668 --> 00:51:08,433 Paul, I'm not going out. 971 00:51:08,435 --> 00:51:10,103 Yes, we are! 972 00:51:10,505 --> 00:51:12,237 -Paul, I'm not going out. -I went online 973 00:51:12,239 --> 00:51:14,372 to that website that's now on the Dark Web-- 974 00:51:14,374 --> 00:51:15,841 Man, I love going out! 975 00:51:15,843 --> 00:51:17,409 Yeah, me too, buddy. 976 00:51:17,411 --> 00:51:18,544 I love going out. 977 00:51:18,546 --> 00:51:20,478 Oh, yeah. Good, good. 978 00:51:20,480 --> 00:51:22,715 We're in Sex and the City, bitch! 979 00:51:22,717 --> 00:51:24,416 Hey. 980 00:51:24,418 --> 00:51:25,820 I used the key you gave Mom. 981 00:51:26,219 --> 00:51:28,088 How many secret boyfriends do you have? 982 00:51:28,523 --> 00:51:31,624 -No. -No. Absolutely not. 983 00:51:31,626 --> 00:51:33,693 - No, I know too much. - Woof. No. 984 00:51:33,695 --> 00:51:36,596 All right, my Uber's waiting, 985 00:51:36,598 --> 00:51:38,430 so you're up, sis. 986 00:51:38,432 --> 00:51:39,333 See you later. 987 00:51:39,499 --> 00:51:40,365 Don't leave me. 988 00:51:40,367 --> 00:51:41,435 No, it's okay. 989 00:51:41,703 --> 00:51:42,737 She's so mean. 990 00:51:43,337 --> 00:51:44,739 Figure it out. Bye. 991 00:51:45,138 --> 00:51:45,740 Bye! 992 00:51:47,875 --> 00:51:49,176 Are you drunk? 993 00:51:50,210 --> 00:51:53,380 No. Are you a ghost? 994 00:51:54,849 --> 00:51:56,651 I've been waiting all night. 995 00:51:57,819 --> 00:51:59,687 I thought you were staying at Mom and Dad's. 996 00:52:00,855 --> 00:52:02,222 Yeah, well... 997 00:52:02,590 --> 00:52:03,691 some things were said, 998 00:52:04,291 --> 00:52:06,326 some feelings were hurt. 999 00:52:06,794 --> 00:52:09,363 Felt like we could use some space, so... 1000 00:52:09,530 --> 00:52:10,330 Where's Jay? 1001 00:52:16,303 --> 00:52:17,235 Well, I guess 1002 00:52:17,237 --> 00:52:18,738 if your relationship was that fragile, 1003 00:52:18,740 --> 00:52:20,273 maybe I did you a favour. 1004 00:52:20,908 --> 00:52:23,645 God, I can't imagine why you're getting a divorce. 1005 00:52:25,647 --> 00:52:26,914 Sorry. Too soon? 1006 00:52:35,422 --> 00:52:36,256 I'm... 1007 00:52:37,357 --> 00:52:38,156 sorry. 1008 00:52:59,847 --> 00:53:01,248 Everything hurts. 1009 00:53:02,917 --> 00:53:04,919 How much did you drink last night? 1010 00:53:05,953 --> 00:53:07,522 Four... appletinis. 1011 00:53:09,724 --> 00:53:11,324 Why are you getting a divorce? 1012 00:53:12,727 --> 00:53:13,761 Geez, Naveen. 1013 00:53:14,929 --> 00:53:16,898 Literally everyone wants to know. 1014 00:53:28,609 --> 00:53:31,278 A month ago, um... 1015 00:53:32,747 --> 00:53:34,849 Manish and I were watching Project Runway, 1016 00:53:36,283 --> 00:53:40,487 and Heidi Klum was wearing this black sheath dress. 1017 00:53:42,590 --> 00:53:44,222 Manish was being honoured at some gala, 1018 00:53:44,224 --> 00:53:45,325 and I asked him 1019 00:53:45,593 --> 00:53:48,696 if I should wear the same dress. 1020 00:53:50,798 --> 00:53:52,466 And he said... 1021 00:53:53,467 --> 00:53:55,903 "I don't care what you wear, just as long as you show up." 1022 00:53:59,974 --> 00:54:01,642 How... dare he? 1023 00:54:02,744 --> 00:54:03,609 Naveen, 1024 00:54:03,611 --> 00:54:06,814 he doesn't-- he doesn't look at me. 1025 00:54:08,883 --> 00:54:10,381 And I can't even get mad about it, 1026 00:54:10,383 --> 00:54:12,952 because I don't look at him either. 1027 00:54:12,954 --> 00:54:14,488 Manish and I didn't find each other. 1028 00:54:14,789 --> 00:54:17,022 Our mothers introduced us, 1029 00:54:17,024 --> 00:54:19,359 which is, scientifically, 1030 00:54:19,527 --> 00:54:21,493 the least horny way two people can meet. 1031 00:54:21,495 --> 00:54:23,629 You guys went on a blind date. 1032 00:54:23,631 --> 00:54:25,296 You're acting as if they sold you off, 1033 00:54:25,298 --> 00:54:26,732 like some kind of child bride. 1034 00:54:26,734 --> 00:54:28,401 The expectations were clear. 1035 00:54:29,336 --> 00:54:30,903 Well... so what? 1036 00:54:30,905 --> 00:54:33,471 Mom and Dad met, like, at their wedding, 1037 00:54:33,473 --> 00:54:35,408 and they're basically great. 1038 00:54:36,511 --> 00:54:37,477 You think? 1039 00:54:37,912 --> 00:54:39,279 What? They are. 1040 00:54:40,648 --> 00:54:42,014 Do you know what Mom said to me? 1041 00:54:42,016 --> 00:54:44,449 "There's more to a relationship than passion. 1042 00:54:44,451 --> 00:54:45,686 You just have to adjust." 1043 00:54:46,587 --> 00:54:49,287 Like... I-I'm sorry, 1044 00:54:49,289 --> 00:54:51,557 I'm not gonna keep living in a loveless marriage 1045 00:54:51,559 --> 00:54:53,493 just because that's what she decided to do. 1046 00:55:01,969 --> 00:55:04,639 I'm sorry I torpedoed your relationship. 1047 00:55:08,009 --> 00:55:09,474 You did... 1048 00:55:09,476 --> 00:55:11,411 yeah, mm, you torpedoed it pretty good. 1049 00:55:13,815 --> 00:55:14,880 I have nothing against 1050 00:55:14,882 --> 00:55:17,750 a boy who took you to DDLJ on your first date. 1051 00:55:17,752 --> 00:55:18,586 Mm. 1052 00:55:20,755 --> 00:55:23,656 Have you... not told him 1053 00:55:23,658 --> 00:55:26,058 how you used to watch it over and over again 1054 00:55:26,060 --> 00:55:27,862 until the VHS stopped working? 1055 00:55:28,328 --> 00:55:28,930 No. 1056 00:55:30,565 --> 00:55:31,532 Why not? 1057 00:55:32,567 --> 00:55:34,836 Because it's an absurd movie. 1058 00:55:35,002 --> 00:55:36,969 You cried every time you watched it. 1059 00:55:36,971 --> 00:55:37,837 Yeah, so did you. 1060 00:55:37,839 --> 00:55:39,907 Then I got arranged to a stranger. 1061 00:55:42,677 --> 00:55:45,580 But you kind of have what SRK and Kajol have. 1062 00:55:45,847 --> 00:55:46,814 That thing... 1063 00:55:47,380 --> 00:55:48,747 that DDLJ thing 1064 00:55:48,749 --> 00:55:51,719 where you look at him and you hear music. 1065 00:55:53,921 --> 00:55:55,422 What are you talking about? 1066 00:55:56,958 --> 00:55:58,826 I saw him touch your hair. 1067 00:55:59,426 --> 00:56:01,095 It was the sweetest thing. 1068 00:56:02,630 --> 00:56:05,032 He touched my hair, so we should get married? 1069 00:56:05,666 --> 00:56:06,834 Oh, I never said that! 1070 00:56:09,604 --> 00:56:11,906 I never said anything to you about music. 1071 00:56:13,674 --> 00:56:15,142 Are you telling me I'm wrong? 1072 00:56:23,150 --> 00:56:26,087 What do I know? I've never heard music myself. 1073 00:56:31,893 --> 00:56:33,895 But if I had what you had... 1074 00:56:37,164 --> 00:56:37,965 What? 1075 00:56:40,902 --> 00:56:41,802 Something real. 1076 00:57:07,762 --> 00:57:10,195 So then he just found his saffron 1077 00:57:10,197 --> 00:57:11,766 and... and left. 1078 00:57:13,100 --> 00:57:16,604 So, any thoughts... 1079 00:57:18,673 --> 00:57:21,507 I know I'm probably not supposed to say this, 1080 00:57:21,509 --> 00:57:22,677 but... 1081 00:57:22,843 --> 00:57:24,612 ...you're my favourite one. 1082 00:57:25,746 --> 00:57:30,217 I just think you're great. I'm a really big fan. 1083 00:57:30,851 --> 00:57:34,922 So, really, any kind of advice or... 1084 00:57:37,658 --> 00:57:40,094 ...any sign would work. 1085 00:58:24,171 --> 00:58:26,674 I really don't feel like watching a movie right now. 1086 00:58:26,841 --> 00:58:29,577 Well, art heals. Especially Fellini. 1087 00:58:33,848 --> 00:58:35,216 What's going on? This is DDLJ. 1088 00:58:35,583 --> 00:58:36,617 I can't watch this right now. 1089 00:58:36,784 --> 00:58:38,219 Hey, Jay, can you just not talk? 1090 00:58:38,586 --> 00:58:39,651 Why are you showing this to me? 1091 00:58:39,653 --> 00:58:40,955 I'm not. This is just what came up. 1092 00:58:59,173 --> 00:58:59,974 What? 1093 00:59:34,141 --> 00:59:36,008 Jay Kurundkar... 1094 00:59:36,010 --> 00:59:39,580 I have historically hated making dramatic displays. 1095 00:59:40,281 --> 00:59:41,849 I find them mortifying. 1096 00:59:42,683 --> 00:59:43,949 Isn't this mortifying? 1097 00:59:45,786 --> 00:59:48,053 But this is something I need to say 1098 00:59:48,055 --> 00:59:50,024 as loudly as possible. 1099 00:59:51,358 --> 00:59:52,793 You are beautiful, 1100 00:59:53,627 --> 00:59:55,196 you are wise, 1101 00:59:55,729 --> 00:59:56,997 and you are brave... 1102 00:59:58,299 --> 01:00:00,000 ...and I'm lost without you. 1103 01:00:26,060 --> 01:00:27,126 Go! 1104 01:00:27,128 --> 01:00:28,996 Go. 1105 01:00:38,973 --> 01:00:40,141 What are you doing? 1106 01:00:40,374 --> 01:00:42,009 That depends... 1107 01:00:42,643 --> 01:00:43,310 is it working? 1108 01:00:55,723 --> 01:00:56,423 It might be. 1109 01:00:57,391 --> 01:00:58,259 In that case... 1110 01:01:04,098 --> 01:01:05,966 I'm asking you again, 1111 01:01:06,667 --> 01:01:09,069 in a very dramatic way... 1112 01:01:10,304 --> 01:01:11,438 for a second time... 1113 01:01:16,277 --> 01:01:17,811 ...if you'd marry me. 1114 01:01:18,279 --> 01:01:19,747 What about your family? 1115 01:01:20,080 --> 01:01:21,248 I love you. 1116 01:01:23,417 --> 01:01:25,219 I won't do this without them. 1117 01:01:26,187 --> 01:01:27,221 I know. 1118 01:01:28,989 --> 01:01:29,890 I love you too. 1119 01:01:59,220 --> 01:02:00,120 Archit, say something. 1120 01:02:00,754 --> 01:02:01,922 What? 1121 01:02:02,089 --> 01:02:03,455 Tell them you're happy for them. 1122 01:02:03,457 --> 01:02:04,992 I am happy for them. 1123 01:02:05,859 --> 01:02:07,259 We're so happy for you. 1124 01:02:07,261 --> 01:02:08,229 Thanks, Mom. 1125 01:02:10,231 --> 01:02:12,499 Dad, I was, uh, wondering 1126 01:02:12,866 --> 01:02:16,103 if, uh you would ask Pandit Kumar to officiate. 1127 01:02:16,437 --> 01:02:17,271 "Officiate"? 1128 01:02:18,239 --> 01:02:19,507 The... wedding? 1129 01:02:20,808 --> 01:02:23,210 Uh, you want Pandit Kumar to do your wedding? 1130 01:02:23,477 --> 01:02:24,945 As opposed to...? 1131 01:02:26,413 --> 01:02:29,283 We thought you would want a more gay wedding. 1132 01:02:29,783 --> 01:02:31,785 A gay wedding? 1133 01:02:31,986 --> 01:02:34,822 Yeah, you know, like where you wear matching suits, 1134 01:02:35,022 --> 01:02:37,089 and we are in a fancy barn, 1135 01:02:37,091 --> 01:02:39,460 and one of your friends becomes an Internet priest... 1136 01:02:39,827 --> 01:02:42,429 No, no. We want an Indian wedding. 1137 01:02:42,930 --> 01:02:44,098 Still gay, though. 1138 01:02:44,431 --> 01:02:47,332 So, which one of you is the bride? 1139 01:02:47,334 --> 01:02:49,268 -Oh, Dad-- -Yeah. 1140 01:02:49,270 --> 01:02:50,804 That-that's not how it works. 1141 01:02:51,071 --> 01:02:52,540 Do we have to give you away? 1142 01:02:52,940 --> 01:02:55,274 Or does someone else give him away? 1143 01:02:55,276 --> 01:02:57,342 That tradition is messed up. 1144 01:02:57,344 --> 01:02:59,512 I mean, technically, we gave Arundhathi away 1145 01:02:59,514 --> 01:03:00,479 to Manish's parents? 1146 01:03:00,481 --> 01:03:02,180 We tried. 1147 01:03:02,182 --> 01:03:03,048 Archit! 1148 01:03:03,050 --> 01:03:04,283 Forget about the giving-away thing. 1149 01:03:04,285 --> 01:03:05,286 But what about the dance? 1150 01:03:06,053 --> 01:03:07,853 At Arundhathi's wedding, 1151 01:03:07,855 --> 01:03:11,258 the groom and his family welcomed her with a dance. 1152 01:03:11,425 --> 01:03:12,424 But with two grooms... 1153 01:03:12,426 --> 01:03:14,428 Well, that's easy. My parents aren't here, 1154 01:03:14,795 --> 01:03:17,530 so I'd be more than happy to watch you all dance for me. 1155 01:03:17,532 --> 01:03:19,532 Uh, isn't that a little... 1156 01:03:19,534 --> 01:03:21,068 What, gay? 1157 01:03:21,235 --> 01:03:21,967 Loud. 1158 01:03:21,969 --> 01:03:24,537 Loud? It's an Indian wedding! 1159 01:03:24,539 --> 01:03:26,206 You don't have to shout. 1160 01:03:30,878 --> 01:03:31,278 It's fine. 1161 01:04:00,874 --> 01:04:03,010 So? Are you gonna say something? 1162 01:04:03,410 --> 01:04:05,277 What is there to say? 1163 01:04:07,414 --> 01:04:09,348 Sometimes, after all these years, 1164 01:04:09,350 --> 01:04:10,552 I just don't know you. 1165 01:04:10,918 --> 01:04:11,985 You know me. 1166 01:04:13,253 --> 01:04:14,920 And you're thinking the same as me. 1167 01:04:14,922 --> 01:04:16,090 Deep down. 1168 01:04:17,191 --> 01:04:19,491 I'm not! I'm not. 1169 01:04:27,067 --> 01:04:29,000 Are you paying attention, Archit? 1170 01:04:29,002 --> 01:04:29,669 Yes. 1171 01:04:29,671 --> 01:04:31,606 First thing-- invitations. 1172 01:04:31,972 --> 01:04:34,241 Naveen, show Jay the one we made for Arundhathi. 1173 01:04:34,408 --> 01:04:36,544 Oh... okay. Um... 1174 01:04:38,879 --> 01:04:39,746 Wow! 1175 01:04:39,748 --> 01:04:42,182 This album makes me so emotional. 1176 01:04:42,550 --> 01:04:45,653 It was $2,300 for the outfit alone. 1177 01:04:46,053 --> 01:04:47,187 Such a waste. 1178 01:04:49,022 --> 01:04:50,558 Anyway, do you like the invite? 1179 01:04:51,125 --> 01:04:54,027 Um, actually, we were planning on sending an email. 1180 01:04:54,194 --> 01:04:55,093 An email? 1181 01:04:55,095 --> 01:04:57,429 We just thought we'd save some trees. 1182 01:04:57,431 --> 01:04:59,333 No trees need to be saved! 1183 01:04:59,500 --> 01:05:02,100 We have to send a proper printed invitation 1184 01:05:02,102 --> 01:05:04,037 that come from your father and me, 1185 01:05:04,271 --> 01:05:05,571 like we did for Arundhathi. 1186 01:05:05,573 --> 01:05:08,041 Because it worked out so well. 1187 01:05:08,543 --> 01:05:09,642 I'm right here. 1188 01:05:09,644 --> 01:05:12,077 And you should be with Manish, adjusting. 1189 01:05:12,079 --> 01:05:13,145 Stop telling me to adjust. 1190 01:05:13,147 --> 01:05:15,046 You can't adjust your way into loving someone. 1191 01:05:15,048 --> 01:05:17,249 Oh! You want true love? 1192 01:05:17,251 --> 01:05:18,483 You want a fairytale, 1193 01:05:18,485 --> 01:05:20,553 you want flowers, you want music. 1194 01:05:20,555 --> 01:05:22,354 In real life, you have to adjust! 1195 01:05:22,356 --> 01:05:23,525 Look how much I'm adjusting! 1196 01:05:24,893 --> 01:05:26,661 I love paper invites. 1197 01:05:27,027 --> 01:05:27,926 Thank you. 1198 01:05:27,928 --> 01:05:29,961 And you should respect the traditions 1199 01:05:29,963 --> 01:05:31,496 you're about to enter into. 1200 01:05:31,498 --> 01:05:32,598 Mom, a day ago, 1201 01:05:32,600 --> 01:05:34,669 you told me to get married by an Internet priest. 1202 01:05:35,035 --> 01:05:37,235 Oh, why you have to be so technical? 1203 01:05:42,476 --> 01:05:43,609 Madam, 1204 01:05:43,611 --> 01:05:46,079 thank you for entrusting me with this homo wedding. 1205 01:05:47,114 --> 01:05:49,049 This is the wedding planner? 1206 01:05:49,517 --> 01:05:51,952 Uh, I thought we said no more barns. 1207 01:05:52,720 --> 01:05:54,986 Oh! Okay. No, no. We're open to it. 1208 01:05:54,988 --> 01:05:56,589 We're open to it. Of course, Master Ji. 1209 01:05:56,591 --> 01:05:58,658 We are so lucky to have you planning it. 1210 01:05:58,660 --> 01:06:00,459 You're always so booked and busy. 1211 01:06:00,461 --> 01:06:01,563 It is all good! 1212 01:06:01,729 --> 01:06:03,228 Love is love. 1213 01:06:03,230 --> 01:06:04,262 And money is money. 1214 01:06:09,203 --> 01:06:11,504 Are we sure about this guy? 1215 01:06:11,506 --> 01:06:13,708 He's perfect. Look at him yell. 1216 01:06:21,081 --> 01:06:22,483 So, which one is the bride? 1217 01:06:25,385 --> 01:06:27,221 The dance floor will be here. 1218 01:06:27,522 --> 01:06:28,754 You ready to shake it? 1219 01:06:28,756 --> 01:06:30,188 I don't really dance. 1220 01:06:30,190 --> 01:06:31,323 What is wrong with you? 1221 01:06:31,325 --> 01:06:33,728 Master Ji, this is perfect. The space is perfect. 1222 01:06:34,127 --> 01:06:34,729 Good. 1223 01:06:35,095 --> 01:06:36,294 Let us talk dates. 1224 01:06:36,296 --> 01:06:39,032 We all know this is the best venue for Indian weddings. 1225 01:06:39,199 --> 01:06:41,166 Lowest divorce rate, highest spirituality 1226 01:06:41,168 --> 01:06:42,267 for the lowest price. 1227 01:06:42,269 --> 01:06:43,636 They have September 11 open. 1228 01:06:43,638 --> 01:06:44,436 Wonderful! 1229 01:06:44,438 --> 01:06:46,471 Oh, Mom, wait-- 1230 01:06:46,473 --> 01:06:48,139 Wait? What is wrong with September 11th? 1231 01:06:48,141 --> 01:06:50,210 Because of something hap-- 1232 01:06:50,377 --> 01:06:52,143 -Oh, the terror attack? -Yes. 1233 01:06:52,145 --> 01:06:53,681 Oh, September 11, is it a discount? 1234 01:06:54,081 --> 01:06:55,347 -Discount? -Yeah. 1235 01:06:55,349 --> 01:06:56,481 There's no discount. 1236 01:06:56,483 --> 01:06:59,484 We don't want that day even if there's a discount. 1237 01:06:59,486 --> 01:07:01,152 We also have September 12... 1238 01:07:01,154 --> 01:07:02,322 -Oh, perfect! -In six years. 1239 01:07:02,690 --> 01:07:04,624 No, that's-- that's way too long. 1240 01:07:04,626 --> 01:07:05,558 Might be good to hold off, 1241 01:07:05,560 --> 01:07:07,529 make sure this man is really the one. 1242 01:07:08,061 --> 01:07:08,728 What? 1243 01:07:08,730 --> 01:07:09,929 What?! 1244 01:07:09,931 --> 01:07:11,564 Do you know what happens in a barn? 1245 01:07:11,566 --> 01:07:12,698 Animals live in a barn! 1246 01:07:12,700 --> 01:07:14,366 You-- my son is getting married! 1247 01:07:14,368 --> 01:07:15,200 Why don't you understand? 1248 01:07:15,202 --> 01:07:16,636 You don't have a proper ballroom 1249 01:07:16,638 --> 01:07:18,436 where I can invite all my friends 1250 01:07:18,438 --> 01:07:19,539 and be happy with them? 1251 01:07:19,541 --> 01:07:21,607 You want a ballroom? People are gonna suffocate! 1252 01:07:21,609 --> 01:07:23,174 -All these flowers-- -Nobody feel bad 1253 01:07:23,176 --> 01:07:25,212 about being in a homo wedding, feeling homophobic. 1254 01:07:25,479 --> 01:07:26,478 -Get over-- -Because of the air. 1255 01:07:26,480 --> 01:07:29,515 Oh, my god! You stop saying "homo" right now! 1256 01:07:29,517 --> 01:07:30,716 Clean, fresh air. 1257 01:07:30,718 --> 01:07:32,484 You think I'm scared of throwing a big wedding? 1258 01:07:32,486 --> 01:07:35,186 You think the Gavaskars cannot have a big wedding? 1259 01:07:35,188 --> 01:07:36,154 -You want big wedding? -Yes. 1260 01:07:36,156 --> 01:07:38,591 We can get the Thunderbirds to fly over 1261 01:07:38,593 --> 01:07:40,158 and spray queer colours. 1262 01:07:40,160 --> 01:07:42,730 Can put the soundtrack... 1263 01:07:43,096 --> 01:07:44,064 She loves you so much. 1264 01:07:45,733 --> 01:07:46,933 I know. 1265 01:07:46,935 --> 01:07:48,534 ...to look at the surroundings anyway. 1266 01:07:48,536 --> 01:07:49,501 Do you realize 1267 01:07:49,503 --> 01:07:51,405 that my only gay son is getting married? 1268 01:07:51,606 --> 01:07:54,172 The kundlis say that this is the best venue-- 1269 01:07:54,174 --> 01:07:56,476 You told Marie about my son's community. 1270 01:08:10,424 --> 01:08:11,524 Why didn't you come in? 1271 01:08:13,160 --> 01:08:14,796 I would have been in the way. 1272 01:08:16,831 --> 01:08:18,198 Are you all done? 1273 01:08:18,533 --> 01:08:20,735 Hmm, is your mother riding with Jay? 1274 01:08:27,542 --> 01:08:29,609 Dad, you know, for a second there, 1275 01:08:29,611 --> 01:08:30,543 I couldn't remember 1276 01:08:30,545 --> 01:08:33,246 why I even wanted any of this anymore, 1277 01:08:34,281 --> 01:08:37,518 but there's a difference between not wanting something 1278 01:08:37,885 --> 01:08:40,153 and being afraid to want it. 1279 01:08:42,155 --> 01:08:43,558 Naveen? 1280 01:08:45,292 --> 01:08:49,160 Dad, what is the worst thing that you think can happen? 1281 01:08:49,162 --> 01:08:50,261 Huh? 1282 01:08:50,263 --> 01:08:52,600 What, a couple of aunties gossip? 1283 01:08:52,767 --> 01:08:55,235 Seriously, Dad, what are you so afraid of? 1284 01:08:59,674 --> 01:09:01,408 Ungrateful children. 1285 01:09:03,343 --> 01:09:04,612 You just... 1286 01:09:07,682 --> 01:09:08,750 ...decide things. 1287 01:09:12,587 --> 01:09:14,454 You and your sister both-- 1288 01:09:14,622 --> 01:09:17,355 you just decide, whatever it is you want. 1289 01:09:17,357 --> 01:09:20,260 You know how much say my father gave me in my wedding? 1290 01:09:22,195 --> 01:09:23,397 None. 1291 01:09:26,466 --> 01:09:27,800 Yeah, well, maybe you're fine 1292 01:09:27,802 --> 01:09:29,300 in some sort of loveless marriage 1293 01:09:29,302 --> 01:09:30,337 for your whole life, but-- 1294 01:09:32,339 --> 01:09:34,207 Is that what you think? 1295 01:09:35,810 --> 01:09:37,745 Of your mother and I? 1296 01:09:40,815 --> 01:09:42,750 I'm gonna ride with Mom and Jay. 1297 01:09:44,519 --> 01:09:48,255 We'll send you an invite, but no obligation to attend. 1298 01:10:20,487 --> 01:10:21,989 Thank you. Thank you. 1299 01:10:23,658 --> 01:10:25,593 Why are you sitting over here? 1300 01:10:25,760 --> 01:10:27,795 You don't need to get in my space, please. 1301 01:10:27,962 --> 01:10:29,161 You go sit in your chair. 1302 01:10:29,163 --> 01:10:30,763 You bought that chair for yourself, right? 1303 01:10:30,765 --> 01:10:32,567 That ridiculous chair. You go there. 1304 01:10:45,913 --> 01:10:47,014 What? Why you looking at me? 1305 01:10:48,883 --> 01:10:50,585 I'm very tired. 1306 01:10:51,418 --> 01:10:53,020 I'm going to head up to bed. 1307 01:11:31,793 --> 01:11:33,391 You found this guy on Craigslist? 1308 01:11:33,393 --> 01:11:34,028 Instagram. 1309 01:11:35,797 --> 01:11:36,662 His ad said 1310 01:11:36,664 --> 01:11:39,734 assembling furniture was his passion. 1311 01:11:40,701 --> 01:11:41,536 - Mom! 1312 01:11:42,703 --> 01:11:43,538 Hey? 1313 01:11:43,738 --> 01:11:45,405 Don't "Hey, Mom" me! 1314 01:11:45,840 --> 01:11:46,605 And you! 1315 01:11:46,607 --> 01:11:47,940 What did you say to your father? 1316 01:11:47,942 --> 01:11:48,541 What? 1317 01:11:48,543 --> 01:11:49,877 He's extremely upset! 1318 01:11:51,512 --> 01:11:52,310 Good. 1319 01:11:52,312 --> 01:11:53,045 "Good"? 1320 01:11:53,047 --> 01:11:54,079 When did you become like this? 1321 01:11:54,081 --> 01:11:54,880 What, brave? 1322 01:11:54,882 --> 01:11:55,716 Disrespectful! 1323 01:11:56,383 --> 01:11:57,216 Sitting like that 1324 01:11:57,218 --> 01:11:58,820 while your mom is still standing! 1325 01:11:59,854 --> 01:12:01,587 I tried, okay? 1326 01:12:01,589 --> 01:12:03,454 I really tried. You know how much. 1327 01:12:03,456 --> 01:12:05,658 See, this is the problem with the two of you. 1328 01:12:05,660 --> 01:12:07,460 You both think we are the enemy. 1329 01:12:07,862 --> 01:12:08,861 Do you know that 1330 01:12:08,863 --> 01:12:11,063 when you even prick your finger, we bleed? 1331 01:12:11,065 --> 01:12:12,131 Excuse me, Ma'am? 1332 01:12:12,133 --> 01:12:14,099 Would you like something to sit on? 1333 01:12:14,101 --> 01:12:15,069 Who are you? 1334 01:12:15,435 --> 01:12:16,535 Where is your shirt? 1335 01:12:16,537 --> 01:12:18,904 -He doesn't work with a shirt. -No, no. Nice boy. 1336 01:12:18,906 --> 01:12:20,773 Nice boy. I'm good. Thank you. No. No. 1337 01:12:20,775 --> 01:12:21,742 She's fine. 1338 01:12:22,043 --> 01:12:23,275 Do you have any idea 1339 01:12:23,277 --> 01:12:25,913 what the last six years have been like for us? 1340 01:12:26,346 --> 01:12:27,980 You just announce that you're gay, 1341 01:12:27,982 --> 01:12:29,116 and you take off. 1342 01:12:29,584 --> 01:12:31,586 You go off to live your own life. 1343 01:12:32,019 --> 01:12:34,820 I don't know anything about you or your relationships, 1344 01:12:34,822 --> 01:12:35,923 nothing, 1345 01:12:36,356 --> 01:12:38,691 and then you come back with this boy 1346 01:12:38,693 --> 01:12:40,427 who we don't know anything about, 1347 01:12:40,761 --> 01:12:43,598 and you just announce that you're engaged? 1348 01:12:43,898 --> 01:12:45,066 Twice? 1349 01:12:45,666 --> 01:12:47,602 How do you expect your father to react? 1350 01:12:50,470 --> 01:12:52,838 And I've been indulging you so much 1351 01:12:52,840 --> 01:12:53,973 out of fear! 1352 01:12:53,975 --> 01:12:57,810 I'm so scared that if I say one wrong word to you, 1353 01:12:57,812 --> 01:13:00,047 you're just gonna cut us off your life forever! 1354 01:13:02,016 --> 01:13:03,117 Mom, I would never-- 1355 01:13:04,652 --> 01:13:05,887 I have to go. 1356 01:13:06,821 --> 01:13:07,953 And you! 1357 01:13:07,955 --> 01:13:10,723 You're wasting your time in this room with one chair. 1358 01:13:15,529 --> 01:13:16,862 All we have is each other! 1359 01:14:24,464 --> 01:14:25,498 Hey, Uncle. 1360 01:14:26,734 --> 01:14:27,833 -Ah. -Megha sent me in. 1361 01:14:27,835 --> 01:14:29,003 Come in. 1362 01:14:29,537 --> 01:14:31,706 Is everything okay? I got your message. 1363 01:14:31,872 --> 01:14:34,742 I thought we can have a little chat. 1364 01:14:39,146 --> 01:14:40,546 Are you making korma? 1365 01:14:40,548 --> 01:14:41,146 Ah. 1366 01:14:41,148 --> 01:14:43,718 Can I help? 1367 01:14:44,085 --> 01:14:47,154 No, no, no. No. I'm okay. 1368 01:14:50,224 --> 01:14:52,691 Do you ever try making this with dates, Uncle? 1369 01:14:52,693 --> 01:14:53,961 Why would I do that? 1370 01:14:54,996 --> 01:14:56,063 That is just odd. 1371 01:14:56,230 --> 01:14:58,199 It's actually a wonderful flavour. 1372 01:14:58,599 --> 01:15:00,032 Then you should make something 1373 01:15:00,034 --> 01:15:02,203 which is supposed to have dates in it. 1374 01:15:05,106 --> 01:15:07,108 Naveen says you've always done the cooking. 1375 01:15:08,275 --> 01:15:09,441 When I was a boy, 1376 01:15:09,443 --> 01:15:11,879 I wanted to cater weddings for a living... 1377 01:15:13,114 --> 01:15:14,215 to be a cook. 1378 01:15:14,682 --> 01:15:15,783 Why didn't you? 1379 01:15:17,184 --> 01:15:20,688 When I told my father, he gave me this. 1380 01:15:23,257 --> 01:15:24,892 That was a different time. 1381 01:15:27,862 --> 01:15:29,096 Not that different. 1382 01:15:30,231 --> 01:15:31,866 Naveen never told me that story. 1383 01:15:32,233 --> 01:15:33,667 He doesn't know. 1384 01:15:35,536 --> 01:15:36,704 I think you should tell him. 1385 01:15:41,609 --> 01:15:43,677 Do you know Naveen used to paint? 1386 01:15:46,013 --> 01:15:46,845 See that? 1387 01:15:46,847 --> 01:15:48,247 Ah. 1388 01:15:48,249 --> 01:15:50,317 He drew that. 1389 01:15:53,587 --> 01:15:54,221 Wow. 1390 01:16:01,328 --> 01:16:03,330 Always surprising me... 1391 01:16:04,832 --> 01:16:05,800 my only son. 1392 01:16:07,568 --> 01:16:09,637 So much inside him. 1393 01:16:11,038 --> 01:16:14,341 Beautiful things... like that. 1394 01:16:16,677 --> 01:16:17,645 He has... 1395 01:16:18,345 --> 01:16:19,947 he has good taste. 1396 01:16:21,215 --> 01:16:22,750 Good instincts. 1397 01:17:04,191 --> 01:17:05,357 Are there dates in this? 1398 01:17:28,149 --> 01:17:29,416 You do all this, 1399 01:17:29,783 --> 01:17:32,119 and you hope it lasts forever... 1400 01:17:33,154 --> 01:17:35,956 ...and if it doesn't, 1401 01:17:36,991 --> 01:17:38,657 you come together and do it all again 1402 01:17:38,659 --> 01:17:39,827 for someone else anyways. 1403 01:17:44,131 --> 01:17:45,299 Because... 1404 01:17:47,101 --> 01:17:48,867 and-and I'm sorry to be sentimental, 1405 01:17:48,869 --> 01:17:50,738 it's not in my nature, but... 1406 01:17:52,806 --> 01:17:55,176 the easiest thing to believe in 1407 01:17:55,910 --> 01:17:56,710 is love. 1408 01:18:04,985 --> 01:18:06,218 Here, stand still. 1409 01:18:06,220 --> 01:18:07,388 Mom, it's fine. 1410 01:18:07,955 --> 01:18:09,356 It's not fine. 1411 01:18:12,426 --> 01:18:14,760 And you, you should be rehearsing! 1412 01:18:14,762 --> 01:18:15,996 I'm all set. 1413 01:18:19,066 --> 01:18:20,034 He looks good, Ma. 1414 01:18:33,113 --> 01:18:33,914 Now... 1415 01:18:34,415 --> 01:18:35,449 the varmala. 1416 01:18:37,184 --> 01:18:38,485 Both our grooms 1417 01:18:38,852 --> 01:18:40,854 will exchange garlands 1418 01:18:42,223 --> 01:18:43,891 just to specify 1419 01:18:44,058 --> 01:18:49,230 their acceptance of each other as spouses. 1420 01:18:51,832 --> 01:18:52,433 Okay. 1421 01:18:53,267 --> 01:18:54,466 Ooh... 1422 01:18:54,468 --> 01:18:55,467 Come... come on. Come on. 1423 01:18:55,469 --> 01:18:58,136 Aren't you the wily coyote? 1424 01:19:17,491 --> 01:19:21,862 Mangalam Bhagwan Vishnuh, Mangalam Garunadhwajah. 1425 01:19:24,532 --> 01:19:30,938 Mangalam Bhagwan Vishnuh, Mangalam Garunadhwajah. 1426 01:19:33,508 --> 01:19:35,207 You know, I say that all the time. 1427 01:19:35,209 --> 01:19:37,478 Shh! 1428 01:19:42,550 --> 01:19:44,049 The couple vows 1429 01:19:44,051 --> 01:19:47,421 to remain loyal as long as they live. 1430 01:19:50,491 --> 01:19:54,295 The couple vows to live in harmony with nature. 1431 01:19:58,966 --> 01:20:01,035 The couple vows to take care 1432 01:20:01,835 --> 01:20:03,270 of each other's families as their own, 1433 01:20:03,504 --> 01:20:05,103 to respect their elders. 1434 01:20:12,279 --> 01:20:14,081 The couple vows support... 1435 01:20:14,481 --> 01:20:17,451 to take equal care of the relationship. 1436 01:20:20,354 --> 01:20:23,525 The couple vows friendship to each other... 1437 01:20:24,559 --> 01:20:25,926 for this life, 1438 01:20:26,427 --> 01:20:27,529 and for all the lives. 1439 01:20:29,296 --> 01:20:30,831 You are now 1440 01:20:31,533 --> 01:20:32,900 one soul. 1441 01:20:33,267 --> 01:20:34,401 They're married. 1442 01:20:35,102 --> 01:20:36,403 Happy marry. 1443 01:20:37,071 --> 01:20:38,005 Oh... 1444 01:21:00,094 --> 01:21:01,159 They say 1445 01:21:01,161 --> 01:21:03,130 when you throw the rice over your shoulder, 1446 01:21:03,430 --> 01:21:06,164 you're finally leaving your parents behind forever. 1447 01:21:10,638 --> 01:21:11,639 But how could you, really? 1448 01:21:49,009 --> 01:21:50,110 Where did Mom go? 1449 01:21:55,182 --> 01:21:55,914 Hello. 1450 01:22:03,591 --> 01:22:04,992 I'm Megha... 1451 01:22:05,392 --> 01:22:06,493 Naveen's mother. 1452 01:22:06,661 --> 01:22:08,160 I didn't know your mom was speaking. 1453 01:22:08,162 --> 01:22:09,327 Uh... 1454 01:22:09,329 --> 01:22:12,634 Naveen's father and I have been married for 35 years, 1455 01:22:13,668 --> 01:22:16,203 so I'm here to offer some advice. 1456 01:22:16,370 --> 01:22:18,203 How much has she had to drink? 1457 01:22:18,205 --> 01:22:19,674 Your mother doesn't drink. 1458 01:22:20,140 --> 01:22:22,007 I didn't meet Naveen's father 1459 01:22:22,009 --> 01:22:23,444 until our engagement, 1460 01:22:24,077 --> 01:22:27,212 so there were many things we didn't know about each other 1461 01:22:27,214 --> 01:22:29,116 until after our wedding day. 1462 01:22:30,083 --> 01:22:32,986 I had to figure out what this new person liked, 1463 01:22:33,153 --> 01:22:34,188 didn't like, 1464 01:22:34,589 --> 01:22:37,088 what he preferred, didn't prefer... 1465 01:22:37,090 --> 01:22:38,192 Maybe she is drunk. 1466 01:22:38,959 --> 01:22:40,562 ...what he really liked, 1467 01:22:41,228 --> 01:22:42,564 really didn't like, 1468 01:22:42,963 --> 01:22:43,731 how much, 1469 01:22:44,264 --> 01:22:45,399 how many times... 1470 01:22:46,133 --> 01:22:47,299 that's right, people. 1471 01:22:47,301 --> 01:22:48,333 I'm talking about 1472 01:22:48,335 --> 01:22:50,370 the most important thing in any relationship... 1473 01:22:51,171 --> 01:22:52,003 food. 1474 01:22:52,005 --> 01:22:54,306 Oh! 1475 01:22:54,308 --> 01:22:56,241 Oh, my god! She got me. 1476 01:22:57,344 --> 01:22:58,646 I was so nervous. 1477 01:22:59,213 --> 01:23:01,281 I had never done it before marriage... 1478 01:23:01,616 --> 01:23:02,515 Oh, my god. 1479 01:23:02,517 --> 01:23:03,585 ...the cooking. 1480 01:23:04,117 --> 01:23:06,586 -Oh, my god. -No. I can't do this. 1481 01:23:06,588 --> 01:23:08,320 This is worse than coming out. 1482 01:23:08,322 --> 01:23:11,693 I tried making him idlis for our first breakfast. 1483 01:23:12,326 --> 01:23:15,293 It came out like idli pudding. 1484 01:23:15,897 --> 01:23:17,565 The dosas kept breaking. 1485 01:23:18,065 --> 01:23:19,431 Potatoes so tough, 1486 01:23:19,433 --> 01:23:20,733 you could break your teeth on them. 1487 01:23:21,769 --> 01:23:23,703 It went on like this for a week, 1488 01:23:23,705 --> 01:23:25,270 and then, one night, 1489 01:23:25,272 --> 01:23:27,775 I woke up to this amazing aroma. 1490 01:23:28,175 --> 01:23:30,143 My husband was in the kitchen, 1491 01:23:30,310 --> 01:23:32,145 cooking an enormous feast. 1492 01:23:33,180 --> 01:23:35,550 Aloo paratha, daal makhani, 1493 01:23:35,717 --> 01:23:37,519 navratan korma, bhindi curry... 1494 01:23:38,418 --> 01:23:40,686 The poor man just couldn't take it anymore! 1495 01:23:40,688 --> 01:23:42,053 He was starving. 1496 01:23:43,791 --> 01:23:46,694 He was so apologetic, but I was so thrilled. 1497 01:23:47,662 --> 01:23:49,797 Afterwards, we conceived our first child-- 1498 01:23:50,397 --> 01:23:51,265 Arundhathi. 1499 01:23:51,431 --> 01:23:52,732 -Oh, shit! -Oh, my god. 1500 01:23:52,734 --> 01:23:54,232 Okay. We're going there. 1501 01:23:54,234 --> 01:23:56,034 Arundhathi, 1502 01:23:56,036 --> 01:23:57,705 who gave us so much joy, 1503 01:23:58,071 --> 01:23:59,406 and who we love so much. 1504 01:24:01,475 --> 01:24:03,745 And Naveen wasn't too far behind. 1505 01:24:04,712 --> 01:24:05,878 Naveen, 1506 01:24:05,880 --> 01:24:08,716 you were such a shy, delicate little boy, 1507 01:24:09,416 --> 01:24:11,617 and I wouldn't say I was so surprised 1508 01:24:11,619 --> 01:24:13,220 when you came out to be a gay... 1509 01:24:14,421 --> 01:24:15,289 Wow. 1510 01:24:15,455 --> 01:24:16,354 -There she is. -Okay. 1511 01:24:16,356 --> 01:24:18,258 ...but I was scared. 1512 01:24:19,159 --> 01:24:20,292 I was worried 1513 01:24:20,294 --> 01:24:22,429 that life would be harder for you. 1514 01:24:23,665 --> 01:24:25,533 I was worried you would be lonely. 1515 01:24:27,301 --> 01:24:28,268 Jay... 1516 01:24:28,435 --> 01:24:30,203 thank you for loving my son. 1517 01:24:30,370 --> 01:24:33,273 You have put my heart at ease. 1518 01:24:34,308 --> 01:24:35,473 Naveen and Jay, 1519 01:24:35,475 --> 01:24:38,378 you two have a major head start on your father and me. 1520 01:24:38,780 --> 01:24:41,481 Yours might seem like a different kind of marriage, 1521 01:24:42,517 --> 01:24:44,151 but if you are lucky, 1522 01:24:44,451 --> 01:24:45,653 in time, 1523 01:24:45,820 --> 01:24:48,590 the love that you have today will seem small, 1524 01:24:48,856 --> 01:24:50,525 because you will see 1525 01:24:50,692 --> 01:24:52,392 as life goes on, 1526 01:24:52,560 --> 01:24:55,493 that your love will grow and grow 1527 01:24:55,495 --> 01:24:56,396 and grow... 1528 01:24:58,098 --> 01:25:00,167 until one day you realize... 1529 01:25:01,536 --> 01:25:03,136 that it will never stop growing. 1530 01:25:35,837 --> 01:25:36,671 Nice speech. 1531 01:25:38,840 --> 01:25:39,741 Thank you. 1532 01:25:43,678 --> 01:25:45,410 You know, your father and I 1533 01:25:45,412 --> 01:25:47,214 were luckier than I realized. 1534 01:25:48,650 --> 01:25:52,152 I think everyone deserves to feel so lucky one day. 1535 01:26:04,164 --> 01:26:05,463 You're next, Chumki. 1536 01:26:09,336 --> 01:26:10,301 Okay. 1537 01:26:10,303 --> 01:26:11,606 So, are you ready? 1538 01:26:12,707 --> 01:26:13,471 -Yeah. -Yeah? 1539 01:26:13,473 --> 01:26:15,407 -Let's do this. -Let's do this. 1540 01:26:15,409 --> 01:26:17,610 - Go! 1541 01:26:17,612 --> 01:26:18,579 The mic, yeah? 1542 01:26:22,482 --> 01:26:24,418 And now, everyone, be quiet! 1543 01:26:25,185 --> 01:26:27,254 I mean it! Be quiet! 1544 01:26:27,454 --> 01:26:28,556 Put it together... 1545 01:26:29,456 --> 01:26:31,659 because the groom's family 1546 01:26:31,893 --> 01:26:34,696 have arranged for a special surprise for the... 1547 01:26:35,530 --> 01:26:36,261 groom! 1548 01:26:38,766 --> 01:26:39,364 What? 1549 01:26:41,803 --> 01:26:42,768 What's happening? 1550 01:26:42,770 --> 01:26:43,803 You know... 1551 01:26:43,805 --> 01:26:46,574 there's nothing gayer than Bollywood... 1552 01:26:46,841 --> 01:26:47,740 Oh, my god. 1553 01:26:47,742 --> 01:26:49,542 ...the bigness of love. 1554 01:27:20,975 --> 01:27:22,608 Okay! 1555 01:27:34,822 --> 01:27:36,321 - What is going on? 1556 01:28:03,785 --> 01:28:04,886 Slay, mama. 1557 01:28:07,522 --> 01:28:08,419 Oh! 1558 01:28:14,762 --> 01:28:15,795 Oh, the dad's involved. 1559 01:28:26,007 --> 01:28:27,305 Oh, my god, he's vogueing! 105221