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1
00:00:10,886 --> 00:00:12,721
Tickets, please.
2
00:00:18,060 --> 00:00:20,103
Barkeep. A drink
for my colleague.
3
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:21,438
Do I know you?
4
00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:23,163
I know the only reason
to travel by train
5
00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:24,525
is to travel with weapons.
6
00:00:24,650 --> 00:00:26,735
And we all know that
at the end of this line,
7
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,987
there's only one creature
worth killing.
8
00:00:29,112 --> 00:00:31,949
The man in the white coat.
9
00:00:32,074 --> 00:00:34,576
May as well take turns
exchanging stories.
10
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:38,205
Mine begins on planet ramamama.
11
00:00:38,330 --> 00:00:40,666
Lower him into acid.
12
00:00:40,791 --> 00:00:44,628
Once he's dissolved,
lower someone else into acid.
13
00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:46,630
Is he dissolved?
14
00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:49,591
At least use the downtime
to reset the acid iowerer.
15
00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:51,552
I really don't like
the attitude around here.
16
00:00:51,677 --> 00:00:54,221
It's a very "lower me into acid"
attitude.
17
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:57,557
Who are you?
18
00:00:58,809 --> 00:00:59,977
How did you reach my sanctum?
19
00:01:01,353 --> 00:01:02,622
All right,
this is going in circles.
20
00:01:02,646 --> 00:01:04,314
Seize him!
21
00:01:04,439 --> 00:01:06,233
- Aah!
- Aah!
22
00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:16,118
- Aah!
- Aah!
23
00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:22,374
Very well.
24
00:01:22,499 --> 00:01:24,793
Now I will fight you.
25
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:27,605
Anyway, he tells a different
version of the story
26
00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:29,464
where I start crying
or something.
27
00:01:29,590 --> 00:01:31,633
That's why he has to die.
28
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:33,051
'Cause he's a liar.
29
00:01:34,428 --> 00:01:36,263
Why are you going to kill
Rick Sanchez?
30
00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:37,628
Okay, I don't know who that is.
31
00:01:37,723 --> 00:01:39,349
I don't accept your weird
leap in logic
32
00:01:39,474 --> 00:01:41,474
that has everyone on a train
going to kill one guy.
33
00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:43,645
And even if I did,
why would we take turns
34
00:01:43,770 --> 00:01:44,872
telling stories about it like
35
00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:46,023
little girls at a sleepover?
36
00:01:46,148 --> 00:01:47,691
If you're trying to be hurtful,
37
00:01:47,816 --> 00:01:48,942
you're doing a good job.
38
00:01:49,067 --> 00:01:50,319
I'll take his turn.
39
00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:52,154
Here's why I'm going
to kill Rick Sanchez.
40
00:01:52,279 --> 00:01:53,530
You guys have fun with this.
41
00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,198
Dissolve to a clam-shaped sun
42
00:01:55,324 --> 00:01:57,117
rising over a giant beach.
43
00:01:57,242 --> 00:01:58,660
Whew.
44
00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,287
By then, of course,
he had left toys
45
00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:03,540
and flesh drops for every
one of us in the spore-hive.
46
00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:04,916
Ah, a newcomer!
47
00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:06,561
I suppose you think you have
a better story
48
00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:09,421
about how Rick Sanchez
saved space Christmas.
49
00:02:09,546 --> 00:02:11,882
What is with
the Rick Sanchez obsession?
50
00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:14,968
I think the best way
to answer that
51
00:02:15,093 --> 00:02:17,346
is with my Christmas Rick tale.
52
00:02:19,056 --> 00:02:20,057
Whoo!
53
00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:21,808
Could've used Rudolph tonight!
54
00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:23,560
Oh, thank god. I'm not too late.
55
00:02:23,685 --> 00:02:24,912
I don't know how to
thank you, goomby.
56
00:02:24,936 --> 00:02:26,104
No need.
57
00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:27,582
You just go in there
and have a nice time.
58
00:02:27,606 --> 00:02:29,191
I will. Thanks.
59
00:02:32,611 --> 00:02:33,820
Rick: Hey.
60
00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:35,322
Merry Christmas, goomby.
61
00:02:35,447 --> 00:02:37,240
Merry Christmas, Rick.
62
00:02:37,366 --> 00:02:38,492
Oh. Uh...
63
00:02:38,617 --> 00:02:39,868
Oh, it's okay.
64
00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,346
I-I don't have to.
Sorry if that was...
65
00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:42,621
No. Um, um, I can ask.
66
00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:44,015
No, no, no,
I don't wanna be a burden.
67
00:02:44,039 --> 00:02:45,540
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, there's just...
68
00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:46,893
There's a lot of people.
Family. You know?
69
00:02:46,917 --> 00:02:47,917
I get it.
70
00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:49,239
- You're not mad?
- Totally fine.
71
00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:58,595
That...
Okay, none of my business
72
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:00,156
but he didn't even save
Christmas in that story.
73
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,223
Oh, how dare you!
74
00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:02,588
That doesn't mean I'm invested.
75
00:03:02,641 --> 00:03:03,892
Tell your Christmas Rick story!
76
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:05,852
Step the hell back! Bach
77
00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:13,245
You start teeing up
a Rick Sanchez vignette,
78
00:03:13,276 --> 00:03:14,945
and you'll be doing it
through two holes.
79
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,839
I'm just trying to figure out
what's going on with this train.
80
00:03:16,863 --> 00:03:18,073
Do you remember getting on it?
81
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,826
No. First thing I remember is...
82
00:03:20,951 --> 00:03:22,703
Tickets, please.
83
00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:26,915
So, why did you date
Rick Sanchez?
84
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:28,375
What?
85
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,103
Oh, you don't have to pretend
you didn't date him.
86
00:03:30,127 --> 00:03:31,753
We all did. We get it.
87
00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:35,298
Low point in your life,
rebound from an ex, et cetera.
88
00:03:35,424 --> 00:03:36,633
No, really, who?
89
00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:38,760
Oh, exactly.
90
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:42,889
In fact, and get this,
when he met my family...
91
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,853
Leah! Leah, check it out.
92
00:03:47,978 --> 00:03:49,080
Where'd you meet this, um...
93
00:03:49,104 --> 00:03:50,939
Sprite?
94
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,191
He's actually a human.
95
00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:55,777
But he invented portal tech?
96
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,612
I am the concept of time.
97
00:03:57,738 --> 00:03:58,738
Jesus!
98
00:03:58,822 --> 00:03:59,990
I warned you not to do that.
99
00:04:00,115 --> 00:04:01,950
- I wasn't trying.
- You don't have to.
100
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,355
The train is
obviously amplifying
101
00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:04,929
and linking unrelated
narrative fields.
102
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:06,163
Uh-huh...
103
00:04:06,288 --> 00:04:07,914
Morty? I told you if you
found me again,
104
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:09,416
identify yourself.
105
00:04:09,541 --> 00:04:11,209
I didn't know it was you.
106
00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:12,494
How did you not recognize me?
107
00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:13,920
Didn't you create the disguises?
108
00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:15,797
When I create shit,
it works, morty.
109
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:17,007
It's called being talented.
110
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:18,300
Why can't we find the engine?
111
00:04:18,425 --> 00:04:20,427
It's not a real train,
it's a story device.
112
00:04:20,552 --> 00:04:22,721
Literally.
A literal literary device
113
00:04:22,846 --> 00:04:25,098
quite literally
metaphorically containing us.
114
00:04:25,223 --> 00:04:26,099
A simulation.
115
00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:27,601
Worse. An anthology.
116
00:04:27,726 --> 00:04:29,269
Okay, so how...
How do we hijack it?
117
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:30,729
Oh, morty, it's been hijacked
118
00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:32,230
for at least two full minutes.
119
00:04:32,355 --> 00:04:34,357
Are you not hearing
this insane conversation?
120
00:04:34,483 --> 00:04:36,902
Okay, tickets please guy,
stop the anthology.
121
00:04:37,027 --> 00:04:39,088
If we wanted one-offs,
we'd do interdimensional cable,
122
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,072
not some uptight, overwritten...
123
00:04:41,198 --> 00:04:42,616
- Rick?
- God damn!
124
00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:43,867
Tickets, please.
125
00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,219
Dude, I'm sure you've got, like,
126
00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:46,953
so many tickets at this point.
127
00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:49,331
Jesus! The tickets please guy
is cut!
128
00:04:49,456 --> 00:04:51,096
He... he... he's... he's
got those things.
129
00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:53,126
W-What do you call them.
Uhm, cum gutters.
130
00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:54,771
- Morty, gross!
- That's what people call them.
131
00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:56,355
Gross people. I don't
want to have to picture
132
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,507
cum so watery
in such volumes that...
133
00:04:58,632 --> 00:04:59,966
Hey, hey, hey, stay back.
134
00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:01,611
I'll kick you.
I-I'll kick your shin, bro.
135
00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:03,136
- Aaah!
- Hey!
136
00:05:03,261 --> 00:05:05,388
I'll fuckin' cook and eat
your ticket-taking ass.
137
00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:07,641
Hey, I found a ticket.
138
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:11,478
Wow, you are just...
Ladies and gentlemen,
139
00:05:11,603 --> 00:05:13,396
the Jackie chan
of human shielding.
140
00:05:13,522 --> 00:05:14,874
Who takes the time to get
this good at...
141
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:15,982
Fuck this.
142
00:05:16,107 --> 00:05:17,609
-Aaah -structural breach.
143
00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:18,985
Losing continuity.
144
00:05:19,110 --> 00:05:20,487
Morty, hold on to something.
145
00:05:20,612 --> 00:05:21,488
Keep your head inside.
146
00:05:21,613 --> 00:05:22,697
Aaah!
147
00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:28,787
Share with your sister, Josh.
148
00:05:28,912 --> 00:05:30,223
Just because it's your
birthday doesn't mean
149
00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:31,665
you can be an asshole.
150
00:05:31,790 --> 00:05:33,750
- You okay, dad?
- Is this real?
151
00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:35,186
I doubt it, but you get
what you get
152
00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:36,437
when you eat dinner
in an arcade.
153
00:05:36,461 --> 00:05:38,672
I mean are you real,
is life real?
154
00:05:38,797 --> 00:05:40,441
Okay, I'm calling the nurse
because you are not
155
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:41,984
- doing this tonight.
- You're god damn right
156
00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:44,128
- I'm not because...
- You are not doing this tonight!
157
00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:45,387
This isn't real life!
158
00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:46,906
- Dad? Oh, my god!
- Honey. Sweetie.
159
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:48,074
- What's happening?
- Give me your tickets.
160
00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:49,391
I... I need tickets.
161
00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:52,727
Everyone give me
tickeeeeeettttttts!
162
00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:54,229
Aaaah!
163
00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:56,857
Aaah!
164
00:05:58,525 --> 00:06:00,694
Female voice:
Emergency continuity deployed.
165
00:06:05,407 --> 00:06:07,093
- This could come in handy.
- Can't we just ride out the...
166
00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:08,451
Fuck you, I'd rather die.
167
00:06:08,577 --> 00:06:10,263
Train cops! Hands in the air!
168
00:06:10,287 --> 00:06:11,607
Tee up a story
about Rick Sanchez!
169
00:06:11,663 --> 00:06:13,039
- He is Rick!
- Jesus Christ!
170
00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:14,499
Is that the tickets please guy?
171
00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:15,876
Well, just the stub.
172
00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:17,210
- Too soon!
- Too soon!
173
00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:18,962
Don't move! Too soon!
174
00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:23,216
So, what did the train cops
do wrong?
175
00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:24,885
Shot... people?
176
00:06:25,010 --> 00:06:26,636
- Shot passengers.
- Wrong.
177
00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:28,865
The passengers tampered
with the anthology's structure.
178
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:30,265
Lethal response was permitted,
179
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,601
but not with him
holding that tank.
180
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,495
Let's take a look at what
they should have done.
181
00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:35,687
Train cops! Hands in the air!
182
00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:37,022
- Drop the tank!
- Drop it!
183
00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:38,607
Drop it! Drop the tank.
184
00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:42,921
Sorry to nitpick, sir,
but if there was
185
00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:45,989
a continuity explosion,
isn't there always one?
186
00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:48,009
And doesn't that mean
those two could be anywhere?
187
00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:49,743
What? No, you idiot,
that... it's...
188
00:06:49,868 --> 00:06:51,971
It's just a training video.
That didn't actually happen.
189
00:06:51,995 --> 00:06:52,995
That's what you think.
190
00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:54,581
Hey. How'd you get here?
191
00:06:54,706 --> 00:06:56,267
Yeah, like we're the ones
that popped up out of nowhere?
192
00:06:56,291 --> 00:06:57,291
Fuck these guys.
193
00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:02,589
Hey, what the hell?
Your leg is healed.
194
00:07:02,714 --> 00:07:04,299
Yeah, it's a real free-for-all.
195
00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:05,842
Here we go.
196
00:07:05,967 --> 00:07:07,486
Of course this thing is
just a fucking circle.
197
00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:09,196
You'd think it was so
god damn complicated...
198
00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:11,640
Okay, here's where
the stupid vignettes were.
199
00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:13,534
God, imagine if that
had been the whole thing.
200
00:07:13,558 --> 00:07:17,312
So now we're here,
and the engine must be here.
201
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:18,998
I'll have to rig us
a couple of space suits
202
00:07:19,022 --> 00:07:21,191
that start failing
around here so we can
203
00:07:21,316 --> 00:07:22,484
Pay a heavy price
204
00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:23,929
for re-entering
at this threshold.
205
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:25,362
We have to leave the train?
206
00:07:25,487 --> 00:07:26,988
We don't have to
do anything, morty.
207
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,573
This is just a structural guide.
208
00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:30,742
We're obviously gonna
impart our own style.
209
00:07:30,867 --> 00:07:32,261
I don't like how meta
this is getting, Rick.
210
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:33,411
Shut up, morty. You're 14.
211
00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:34,976
You watch videos
of people on YouTube
212
00:07:35,038 --> 00:07:36,581
reacting to fucking YouTube.
213
00:07:36,706 --> 00:07:37,934
I'll be the judge of
when we get too meta.
214
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:38,959
Holy shit.
215
00:07:39,084 --> 00:07:40,353
- How is he still breathing?
- Aah!
216
00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:41,962
He's suspended in disbelief,
217
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:43,773
slowly dying while
living out an alternative
218
00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,006
non-diagetic reality.
219
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,008
Geez, what a horrible
way to die.
220
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:48,152
You don't know the half of it.
221
00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:49,719
Oh!
222
00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:51,656
You're on fuego with the
guy-torn-in-half bits, Rick.
223
00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:52,847
That one was organic, though.
224
00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:54,453
That's because
you're naturally funny.
225
00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:55,785
That... that's good
old-fashioned fun
226
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,143
right there, you know?
227
00:07:57,268 --> 00:07:58,663
W-W-We don't need
to over-think shit, okay?
228
00:07:58,687 --> 00:07:59,927
Okay, buddy. Nice and grounded,
229
00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:01,260
fully immersive
from here on out.
230
00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,332
- Right after this.
- W-What's happening?
231
00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:05,568
Going into an act break.
232
00:08:06,403 --> 00:08:08,154
J“ not quite a bird j“
233
00:08:08,279 --> 00:08:10,156
j“ not quite a person j“
234
00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:11,533
j“ maybe what matters j“
235
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:13,994
jlstolove yourself first and j“
236
00:08:14,119 --> 00:08:15,620
j“ soar j“
237
00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:17,455
j“ child of air and land j“
238
00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:19,708
j“ with wings and hands j“
239
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:21,584
j“ yes, you're a bird
and a person j“
240
00:08:21,710 --> 00:08:23,795
j“ I'm a bird and a person j“
241
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:25,672
both: J“ and more j“
242
00:08:25,797 --> 00:08:27,465
sure, that was a great moment,
243
00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:28,651
but it was hardly the best time
244
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:29,777
Rick and morty were musical.
245
00:08:29,801 --> 00:08:31,011
Who can forget the t...
246
00:08:31,136 --> 00:08:32,887
Hey. You guys
think there's something weird
247
00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:34,180
about this train?
248
00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:35,408
We've been here
a really long time
249
00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:36,617
and nobody's taken our tickets.
250
00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:37,767
Aaah!
251
00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:41,438
Aaaah!
252
00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:43,648
The galaxy's greatest scientists
continue to ponder
253
00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:46,443
the horrific figure known
to children as floaty blood man.
254
00:08:46,568 --> 00:08:49,070
But after three months, nobody
is any closer to the truth.
255
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,114
For cutesy name news,
I'm uncle nibbles.
256
00:08:51,239 --> 00:08:53,450
I can't believe
floaty bloody man is real.
257
00:08:53,575 --> 00:08:55,577
He's more than real,
he's my new god.
258
00:08:55,702 --> 00:08:57,579
- Check it.
- Is that brand-new,
259
00:08:57,704 --> 00:08:59,682
- or is the blood just...
- Accurately depicted, yeah.
260
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,750
His followers believe
the entire universe
261
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,668
is floaty bloody man's
nightmare as he dies
262
00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:05,128
in a time-dilated reality.
263
00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:06,588
So we could go at any minute.
264
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:09,049
No. I'm part of
the floaty nogasm brotherhood.
265
00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:10,508
We believe we're
keeping him alive
266
00:09:10,633 --> 00:09:13,011
by redirecting our suppressed
sexual energies.
267
00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:14,471
You're staying a virgin
268
00:09:14,596 --> 00:09:17,057
just to keep
the universe existing?
269
00:09:17,182 --> 00:09:19,434
That's... so attractive.
270
00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:20,643
It is?
271
00:09:20,769 --> 00:09:22,729
Okay, look,
let's just do it once.
272
00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:28,443
Sorry.
273
00:09:29,444 --> 00:09:30,945
Aaah!
274
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:32,447
- Happy now?
- He was suffering.
275
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:33,823
Keep moving.
276
00:09:33,948 --> 00:09:35,428
We have to get
to the return threshold
277
00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:36,927
before the ticking clock
on your suit gets to zero.
278
00:09:36,951 --> 00:09:38,179
Why would you put
ticking clock...
279
00:09:38,203 --> 00:09:39,430
Because if it's too easy
to get there,
280
00:09:39,454 --> 00:09:40,955
we'll never get there.
281
00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:42,892
If you don't want to be meta
stop, deconstructing shit.
282
00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:44,542
That's the thematic seal.
283
00:09:44,667 --> 00:09:46,169
Gotta find a way to disrupt it.
284
00:09:46,294 --> 00:09:49,172
Okay, morty, tell a story
unrelated to us.
285
00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:51,341
- Uh, what do...
- Stop thinking and do it!
286
00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:53,426
Uh, okay, uh, there was this...
287
00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:55,512
My name is Mike Johnson.
That's good coffee.
288
00:09:56,638 --> 00:09:58,306
Better get that door.
289
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,309
I want your cookies.
290
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,714
I'm hungry, I want your cookies.
291
00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:04,145
Scorpions, scorpions.
292
00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:06,272
There's scorpions outside.
Get inside.
293
00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:07,649
What do they want from us?
294
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:09,275
- They want food.
- Me too.
295
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:10,401
Rick: Okay, just stop.
296
00:10:10,527 --> 00:10:12,112
I'm not a writer, okay?
297
00:10:12,237 --> 00:10:14,048
Relax, your story was supposed
to be awful and stupid.
298
00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:15,299
I just failed to
predict how well
299
00:10:15,323 --> 00:10:16,699
that would mesh with the theme.
300
00:10:16,825 --> 00:10:18,034
Think. Think.
301
00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:19,619
What kind of story
would we never...
302
00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:21,704
Morty, do you know
what the bechdel test is?
303
00:10:21,830 --> 00:10:23,230
- The what?
- For god's sake, morty,
304
00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:24,833
the formula for
measuring female agency
305
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,977
in a story proposed by
lesbian cartoonist Allison...
306
00:10:27,001 --> 00:10:28,729
What the hell are they
teaching you in that school?!
307
00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:30,473
- Other stuff!
- Then you've killed us both!
308
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:32,507
Why is lesbian part
of her job title?!
309
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:33,883
Oh, now you're progressive?!
310
00:10:34,008 --> 00:10:35,648
- What is the test?!
- You have to tell...
311
00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:41,099
Morty, morty.
312
00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:43,643
Two women.
They both have to have names
313
00:10:43,768 --> 00:10:45,329
and talk to each other
about something...
314
00:10:45,353 --> 00:10:46,688
Rick!
315
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:48,731
- Other than a man...
- Oh, Rick, listen to me.
316
00:10:48,857 --> 00:10:51,401
Once upon a time,
my mom and my sister...
317
00:10:51,526 --> 00:10:53,111
Listen to me!
318
00:10:54,279 --> 00:10:56,197
Mom, can I try yourtea?
319
00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:58,032
Yes, summer.
320
00:10:58,158 --> 00:10:59,659
Yes. Try my tea.
321
00:10:59,784 --> 00:11:02,036
It's so good. It's so warm.
322
00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:04,164
Mom, can I talk to you
323
00:11:04,289 --> 00:11:05,707
about my special time?
324
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:07,917
It's okay. I have one, too.
325
00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:09,127
Mine is heavy today.
326
00:11:09,252 --> 00:11:10,920
Mine is never light.
327
00:11:11,045 --> 00:11:12,797
I love you ever
since you were...
328
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,090
Mailed to me.
329
00:11:14,215 --> 00:11:15,758
By a doctor woman.
330
00:11:15,884 --> 00:11:17,260
Your special time is your power.
331
00:11:17,385 --> 00:11:19,470
It makes you strong like a boob.
332
00:11:19,596 --> 00:11:20,763
Strong against what?
333
00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,849
Scorpions. Female scorpions.
334
00:11:22,974 --> 00:11:24,976
They're attacking
outside. Come on.
335
00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:29,189
Fight them with your
heavy special time.
336
00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:30,565
You do it, too.
337
00:11:37,906 --> 00:11:39,449
- Hello?
- Hello?
338
00:11:39,574 --> 00:11:42,285
I'm that supreme court lady,
and you fucking did it.
339
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:44,537
- We did it!
- We did it!
340
00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:50,877
Great job, morty.
341
00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:52,462
A feminist masterpiece.
342
00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,172
Hey, look.
343
00:11:57,926 --> 00:12:00,136
Guess who's got two penises
and all the agency?
344
00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:02,138
Rick and morty.
345
00:12:02,263 --> 00:12:03,806
Story lord.
346
00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:05,618
I should've known you were
behind this, and I did.
347
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:06,809
- Who is this guy?
- Ugh.
348
00:12:06,935 --> 00:12:08,811
He's like a matrix
space frasier.
349
00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:10,080
Let's get this fight
over with, nerd.
350
00:12:10,104 --> 00:12:11,189
I've got shit to do.
351
00:12:11,314 --> 00:12:12,690
You of all people know, Rick,
352
00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:15,193
there can be no destination
without a journey.
353
00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:17,403
I don't know that at all.
I regularly teleport.
354
00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:20,156
Oh, of course. No rules for you.
355
00:12:20,281 --> 00:12:21,866
Spiraling through
the multiverse,
356
00:12:21,991 --> 00:12:24,744
burping semi-improvised dialogue
about how nothing matters,
357
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:27,330
so we may as well pull out
our dicks and rub them
358
00:12:27,455 --> 00:12:29,999
on fate's glaring teeth
like we're brushing fate's teeth
359
00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:32,210
but we're using your gross,
dirty dick.
360
00:12:32,335 --> 00:12:33,419
Must be nice.
361
00:12:33,544 --> 00:12:34,772
Nobody's stopping you.
362
00:12:34,796 --> 00:12:36,839
True. Not anymore.
363
00:12:38,049 --> 00:12:39,329
- Goddamn!
- We already did this.
364
00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:41,511
Oh, is this a double beat?
Oh, well.
365
00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:43,429
Just how I adventure, dawg.
366
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:44,674
This is more impressive than
367
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:45,950
the tickets please guy, though.
368
00:12:45,974 --> 00:12:47,517
You are like 90% cum gutter.
369
00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:50,728
It's called discipline.
Watch this.
370
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:52,480
- God damn.
- Geez!
371
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:53,606
Do we have to fight him?
372
00:12:53,731 --> 00:12:54,899
I don't want to.
373
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:56,442
We surrender.
We're not fighting.
374
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:00,405
Fucking kick your ass.
375
00:13:01,531 --> 00:13:02,824
Oh!
376
00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:05,034
Hey! Get back in your egg!
377
00:13:06,703 --> 00:13:08,013
- What the...
- Don't worry, morty!
378
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:09,117
Nothing out there is canon!
379
00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:11,976
- We've got a pulse.
- Stay with me, private.
380
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:13,668
Smith, listen to me.
You were exposed
381
00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,712
to a chemical that is
altering your mind.
382
00:13:15,837 --> 00:13:17,106
To beat it,
you have to hold on...
383
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,130
We're losing him.
384
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:19,757
Aliens. Sarge?!
385
00:13:19,882 --> 00:13:22,218
Morty, never forget the highest
truth of all...
386
00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:24,470
You're getting your
ass kicked on a train.
387
00:13:25,596 --> 00:13:26,931
Professor Sanchez?
388
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:28,056
Did it work?
389
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,767
I wouldn't say that, Marcus.
390
00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:32,353
I'd say it fucking worked.
391
00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:35,106
100% time dilation
and total immersion.
392
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:36,566
- Define "total."
- Marcus,
393
00:13:36,691 --> 00:13:38,359
I've been back in reality
for three hours,
394
00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:40,713
and I still have memories
of a completely different life.
395
00:13:40,737 --> 00:13:42,572
I-I-I was a scientist still.
396
00:13:42,697 --> 00:13:44,365
I-I-I was... I-I-I had developed
397
00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:47,452
inter-dimensional travel,
i-i-i-i had a daughter.
398
00:13:47,577 --> 00:13:49,120
I-I didn't have a mustache.
399
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:53,291
H was kinda funny sometimes,
mostly burping.
400
00:13:53,416 --> 00:13:54,751
No more secret testing.
401
00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,169
I can help people now.
402
00:13:56,294 --> 00:13:57,378
You've helped people.
403
00:13:57,503 --> 00:13:58,671
I've hurt more.
404
00:13:58,796 --> 00:14:00,089
Aaah!
405
00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:02,008
P-P-Professor Sanchez.
I-I'm morty Smith
406
00:14:02,133 --> 00:14:03,593
from the... the...
The the 241st.
407
00:14:03,718 --> 00:14:05,195
They... they... put your
pill in our food.
408
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:06,721
- It... it works.
- Call the police!
409
00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:08,514
It's okay. It's okay.
It's not real.
410
00:14:08,639 --> 00:14:10,183
N-n-n-n-nothing's real.
411
00:14:10,308 --> 00:14:11,392
I'm sorry, son.
412
00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:13,227
I-I-It's okay. You aren't real.
413
00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:17,815
God, you're right.
I should do more freeform stuff.
414
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,942
- Story lord: In you go.
- What's happening?
415
00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:21,527
The reason I brought you here.
416
00:14:21,652 --> 00:14:23,613
I'll now fuel
my anthology with your
417
00:14:23,738 --> 00:14:25,365
limitless potential,
propelling it to
418
00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:28,659
its final stop...
Beyond the fifth wall.
419
00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:33,206
You idiot. Our potential
isn't limitless.
420
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:34,516
You'll never break
the fifth wall
421
00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:35,625
before you've burnt us out.
422
00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:38,378
Is that so? Oh, well. Win-win.
423
00:14:38,503 --> 00:14:39,670
Rick, w-what's he doing?
424
00:14:39,796 --> 00:14:41,214
He's trying to tap
into us, morty.
425
00:14:41,339 --> 00:14:43,174
Resist.
426
00:14:43,299 --> 00:14:45,385
I can't believe you're finally
headed off to college.
427
00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:46,870
Yeah, you know,
it really felt like
428
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,304
you were gonna be 17 forever.
429
00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:50,348
For, like, 16 years, at least.
430
00:14:50,473 --> 00:14:52,433
I can't believe
I'm tearing up over this.
431
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,894
Jesus, Rick, you know,
you've really softened up.
432
00:14:55,019 --> 00:14:56,479
It's a human moment, morty.
433
00:14:56,604 --> 00:14:58,189
It's a human moment.
434
00:14:58,314 --> 00:15:00,108
- Aaah!
- Aaah! It hurts!
435
00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,157
Abradolph lincoler?
I thought you were dead.
436
00:15:08,282 --> 00:15:11,202
I'm very much alive,
and I need your help.
437
00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:12,662
Yeah!
438
00:15:12,787 --> 00:15:14,181
Shit. He's taking
the good stuff, morty.
439
00:15:14,205 --> 00:15:15,790
Wait, is...
Is any of this canon?
440
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:16,999
It could have been.
441
00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:18,709
Oh, dear.
442
00:15:18,835 --> 00:15:21,712
Are there things Rick Sanchez
holds sacred after all?
443
00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:29,595
How did you find us?
444
00:15:31,139 --> 00:15:32,390
I trusted you!
445
00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:34,642
Don't blame others
for your bad decisions.
446
00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:38,855
Resist, morty!
Resist before he burns us out!
447
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:40,565
Oh, too late now!
448
00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:41,899
What's wrong, Rick?
449
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:44,193
Don't you want to see
how your story ends?!
450
00:15:57,874 --> 00:15:59,625
Holy shit, Rick. What do we...
451
00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:00,978
There... there...
There's now way out!
452
00:16:01,002 --> 00:16:02,253
You're right, morty.
453
00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:04,064
Sometimes it does seem
like there's no way out.
454
00:16:04,088 --> 00:16:05,423
Like it's hopeless.
455
00:16:05,548 --> 00:16:07,717
But remember, there's always
someone there for us.
456
00:16:07,842 --> 00:16:09,051
Who?
457
00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:10,195
My best friend
and personal savior,
458
00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:11,512
Jesus Christ.
459
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:12,990
What?! You... you don't
believe in god.
460
00:16:13,014 --> 00:16:14,390
But he believes in us, morty.
461
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:16,225
You know, I thought
I was the inventor,
462
00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:17,578
but the greatest
invention of all
463
00:16:17,602 --> 00:16:19,061
is the free gift
of eternal life.
464
00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:21,063
Is this...
Are you fucking with me?
465
00:16:21,189 --> 00:16:22,648
Oh, trust me, morty.
466
00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:24,573
I've done plenty of
effed up stuff in my life.
467
00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:26,819
But it's never too late
to accept Christ.
468
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:28,404
Jesus is always
knocking at the door.
469
00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:30,089
All we have to do
is open it and let him
470
00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:31,282
- into our hearts.
- How?
471
00:16:31,407 --> 00:16:32,700
I'm so glad you asked, morty.
472
00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:34,827
Just close your eyes
and go to him in prayer.
473
00:16:34,952 --> 00:16:36,204
Like this.
474
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:37,955
- Heavenly father.
- Heavenly father.
475
00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:39,850
Together: Thank you for sending
your only begotten son.
476
00:16:39,874 --> 00:16:41,751
What a second, no!
What are you doing?!
477
00:16:41,876 --> 00:16:43,836
Together: Jesus, I accept you
into my heart.
478
00:16:43,961 --> 00:16:45,213
No! This sucks.
479
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:47,089
Stop! You guys would
never do this.
480
00:16:47,215 --> 00:16:48,575
Together:
Fill me with your spirit.
481
00:16:48,633 --> 00:16:50,233
Make me a shining city
on a hill for you.
482
00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:51,928
- No! No!
- Together: Make me born again.
483
00:16:52,053 --> 00:16:53,721
- No!
- In Jesus' name, we pray.
484
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:55,139
- Amen.
- Amen.
485
00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:56,724
- Amen!
- You did it!
486
00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,184
- Way to go, morty!
- Crossy.
487
00:16:58,309 --> 00:16:59,435
Bible-saurus. You made it.
488
00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:01,521
We wouldn't miss this
for anything!
489
00:17:01,646 --> 00:17:02,813
You said it, Mr. Celery.
490
00:17:02,939 --> 00:17:04,774
What the fuck is all of this?!
491
00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,609
Greatest story
ever told, story lord.
492
00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:08,486
No, it's not. It's awful!
493
00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:11,656
I beg your pardon?
494
00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:13,449
Ah!
495
00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:15,201
Goddamn.
496
00:17:15,326 --> 00:17:17,119
My lord and my god!
497
00:17:17,245 --> 00:17:18,764
- No! No! It sucks in here.
- Let's get the fuck
498
00:17:18,788 --> 00:17:20,623
outta here. Go, now.
499
00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,124
Ugh. We're safe, morty.
500
00:17:22,250 --> 00:17:23,793
Nobody ever wanted
to see that shit.
501
00:17:23,918 --> 00:17:25,586
Wh-what's gonna happen
to story lord?
502
00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,922
He gets to spend eternity in
every writer's hell...
503
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:29,257
- The Bible.
- I don't know.
504
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:31,133
Some people actually
like that stuff.
505
00:17:31,259 --> 00:17:32,677
Seems kind of cynical.
506
00:17:32,802 --> 00:17:34,404
I just don't like taking
cheap shots, you know?
507
00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:36,097
Cheap shots?
Morty, we were literally
508
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:37,515
saved by Jesus Christ.
509
00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:39,392
Tell me in any way
how that's offensive.
510
00:17:39,517 --> 00:17:41,060
This was a little confusing,
511
00:17:41,185 --> 00:17:43,163
but I guess it brought us
closer together, you know?
512
00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:44,564
Tested our demons.
513
00:17:44,689 --> 00:17:46,250
Made us believe in
ourselves more than ever.
514
00:17:46,274 --> 00:17:47,567
Yeah. You're right, morty.
515
00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,419
We got all that meta-canon
shit outta the way
516
00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:51,070
and now we can
just be ourselves.
517
00:17:51,195 --> 00:17:52,780
Now what do you say we
bring this train
518
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:54,490
into the station.
519
00:18:03,958 --> 00:18:06,419
Oh, shit.
520
00:18:06,544 --> 00:18:08,004
Morty: So what do you think?
521
00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:09,449
Wow. Where did you
get this thing?
522
00:18:09,547 --> 00:18:11,173
The citadel of ricks gift shop.
523
00:18:11,299 --> 00:18:13,759
Do you really like it?
I didn't think you'd even care.
524
00:18:13,884 --> 00:18:15,970
What? Morty. No. I love it.
525
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:17,680
You did the most
important thing.
526
00:18:17,805 --> 00:18:19,056
You... you bought something.
527
00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:20,516
- What?
- You bought something.
528
00:18:20,641 --> 00:18:23,227
With money. God.
I love money so much, morty.
529
00:18:23,352 --> 00:18:25,354
- Are you being sarcastic?
- Merchandise, morty.
530
00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:28,024
Your only purpose in life is to
buy and consume merchandise.
531
00:18:28,149 --> 00:18:29,709
And you did it.
You went into a store...
532
00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:32,445
An actual honest to god store...
And you bought something.
533
00:18:32,570 --> 00:18:34,548
You didn't ask questions
or raise ethical complaints.
534
00:18:34,572 --> 00:18:36,508
You... you just looked straight
into the bleeding jaws
535
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:38,743
of capitalism
and said "yes, daddy, please."
536
00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:41,162
And I'm... I'm so proud of you.
537
00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:42,639
I only wish you could've
bought more.
538
00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:45,041
I... I love buying things
so much, morty.
539
00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:46,334
Rick, are... are you...
540
00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:47,779
Do you need to go
to the hospital?
541
00:18:47,835 --> 00:18:50,046
I love you, morty.
Give grandpa a kiss.
542
00:18:50,171 --> 00:18:51,931
Give... give... gimme...
Give grandpa a kiss.
543
00:18:52,006 --> 00:18:53,215
Lips if you want.
544
00:18:53,341 --> 00:18:54,651
What... whatever
you're comfortable with.
545
00:18:54,675 --> 00:18:55,843
Some cultures do that.
546
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,720
That was sweet. Thank you.
547
00:18:57,845 --> 00:19:00,181
I... I love you.
You're my little buddy.
548
00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:01,849
Okay.
549
00:19:01,974 --> 00:19:03,534
Let's watch some
interdimensional cable.
550
00:19:08,773 --> 00:19:10,441
So you're saying my father
551
00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:11,942
and his kingdom...
552
00:19:12,068 --> 00:19:14,820
Well, yes...
It's based on the fusion
553
00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:16,364
of a sumerian god named "ya"
554
00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:19,158
and a mesopotamian god
named "way."
555
00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:21,619
And we're in a toy train?
556
00:19:21,744 --> 00:19:23,079
Yes.
557
00:19:23,204 --> 00:19:24,514
It's enough to really
make you question
558
00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:26,415
all of existence, isn't it?
559
00:19:26,540 --> 00:19:28,918
So what do you think you're
gonna do about it?
560
00:19:29,043 --> 00:19:32,129
I'm gonna do
what I've always done.
561
00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:34,173
I'm gonna get the fuck
outta here.
562
00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:38,761
Father of omens!
Give me blood beyond sight!
563
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:42,765
Hey, what the fuck, morty?
564
00:19:42,890 --> 00:19:44,576
The train you got me just
completely derailed itself.
565
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:46,119
There's blood all over
the windows on it.
566
00:19:46,143 --> 00:19:48,063
Oh, man, I'm sorry, Rick.
I guess I'll return it.
567
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:49,480
Return... are you insane?
568
00:19:49,605 --> 00:19:50,725
Did you hear nothing I said?
569
00:19:50,773 --> 00:19:51,899
Buy another one, morty.
570
00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:53,484
Consume, morty.
571
00:19:53,609 --> 00:19:55,587
Nobody's out there shopping
with this fucking virus.
572
00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:57,071
Where's your fucking wallet?!
573
00:20:27,685 --> 00:20:29,285
Rick: Tired of the same
boring adventures
574
00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:30,479
with your dogshit Marty?
575
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:32,314
- Yeah!
- Aw. Geez
576
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:34,608
then get ready for the citadel
of Rick's story train.
577
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:36,193
Deep voice: Story train.
Story train.
578
00:20:36,318 --> 00:20:37,838
Rick: The citadel of Rick's
story train
579
00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:39,822
comes with car after car
of enemies, lovers,
580
00:20:39,947 --> 00:20:41,323
and goomby, all grappling with
581
00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:42,634
the nature of who you truly are.
582
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:44,098
Morty: Rick is a god!
Tickets please.
583
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:45,680
Rick: Whoa! Watch out!
It's story lord!
584
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:46,954
Damn. He's jacked.
585
00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:48,581
Deep voice: Pure cum gutter.
586
00:20:48,706 --> 00:20:50,475
Rick: And of course, what
story would be complete
587
00:20:50,499 --> 00:20:52,185
without the engineer of
the greatest story ever told.
588
00:20:52,209 --> 00:20:53,210
Morty: Oh, Jesus Christ.
589
00:20:53,335 --> 00:20:54,575
Jesus: I have come not to judge
590
00:20:54,628 --> 00:20:56,255
the world, but to save it.
591
00:20:56,380 --> 00:20:58,108
Rick: And the best part is,
the fun never ends.
592
00:20:58,132 --> 00:20:59,568
Thanks to the Rick-patented
anthology generator,
593
00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:00,952
you'll never run out
of new stories
594
00:21:01,051 --> 00:21:02,136
and people to tell them.
595
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:03,655
- Are they alive?
- Rick: Of course.
596
00:21:03,679 --> 00:21:04,959
But not in any ways that matter.
597
00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:06,432
Deep voice:
They. Have. No. Souls.
598
00:21:06,557 --> 00:21:07,767
Puppets. Of. Fate.
599
00:21:07,892 --> 00:21:09,226
Rick: The story train.
600
00:21:09,351 --> 00:21:10,978
Available now in
the citadel of ricks.
601
00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:12,581
Buy it ironically.
Buy it sincerely. Just buy it.
602
00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:13,957
Not buying it is an act
of buying it.
603
00:21:13,981 --> 00:21:15,208
Buy it now. Look it up.
It's real.
604
00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:16,942
Www. Story-train. Com.
605
00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:19,004
On the Internet. It's there.
Buy it. Buy the train.
606
00:21:19,028 --> 00:21:20,279
We want you to buy the train.
41160
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