All language subtitles for Very Important People s02e14 Greg and Charlotte Excitement.eng

- Hi, I'm Isabella Roland.

- And I'm Brennan Lee Mulligan.

- Welcome to our key party.

- Leave your key in the bowl
by the door and get some water.

It's gonna be a long night.

(upbeat exciting music)

- [Vic] Today we are
giving these comedians

a total transformation.

(Brennan laughing)

They have no idea who or
what they're about to become.

- Shut the fuck up.
- I love it.

- [Vic] Once they see
themselves in the mirror,

they'll have to make up
a character on the spot

and then sit down with me
for an improvised interview.

This is "Very Important People."

(bright music)

3, 2, 1, open!

(exciting funky music)

- Well, well now.
- Well, I cannot.

No.
- I-

(both laughing)

Our true selves at last.

My God, you actually just look stunning.

- And you are beautiful.

- Well, let's relax, but...

- Different strokes

for different folks.
- For different folks.

- Are we superheroes?

Sunfire, use your radiance
blast and after that,

I'll use twirl attack.

Pow!
- Pow.

- Drink milk every day!

The American Dairy
Farmers Association says,

"Fuck terrorism!"

(upbeat funky music continues)

Too dark?

- They made me look too good,
(Brennan laughing)

and I think it's a little too distracting.

Get to a point and it's
like, can't be funny.

(all laughing)

- After WrestleMania, we
decided to amicably part ways.

I haven't taken my ring off.

- And I've moved on.

(exciting theme music)

(exciting theme music continues)

- I could go to couples therapy by myself,

'cause then it's not couples therapy,

it's just solo therapy.

And I do that twice a
week by myself already.

Okay, well I love you and, okay, so,

and you're, it's gone, so.

We all have a story to tell,

and sometimes those stories need

to be shared with the world.

Good evening, I'm Vic Michaelis,

back with another edition
of "Very Important People."

- Do you consent?
- Do you consent

to being physically lifted

in the air?
- Do you consent?

Do you consent?
- Do you consent to be

physically lifted?
- Yes, I am, I am.

Okay, okay, ah!
- Here we go,

here we go.
- Ah, okay!

- And this is the power of wrestling.

- Wow.
- This is the power

of wrestling.
- And it's the power

of wrestling, okay.
- This is the power

of wrestling.
- Here we go.

- Wow.
- Here we go.

- There we go.
- Hello, and we're here.

Wow. I don't like.
- Here we go, here we go.

- [Both] Go, every time.

We don't stop. Here we go.

Here we go.

- Here we go.
- Here we go!

Okay wonderful.

- Here we go, yes.
- Wow.

- This is the power

of wrestling.
- Please sit, sit down.

- This is the power.
- This is the power

of wrestling.
- This is the power

of wrestling.
- Wrestling.

- Wow.
- This is the power-

- Of wrestling, wow, okay.
- This is the power

of wrestling.

- And thank you.

Wow.
- What's up?

It's Greg Excitement

and Charlotte Excitement.
- Excitement.

- Telling you to shut the fuck up

and enjoy what we do.

(intense music)
(electronics beeping)

- Wow. Come on.
- Spot me. Spot me.

- Come on folks.
- Spot spot.

- And look at this. Spot.
- Spot me.

- Back away.
- Spot me.

- And I'm here.
- Spot me.

- And my hands are up.
- Spot.

- And I'm not touching.
- Back away.

- Wow. Okay. (laughing)

- [Brennan] This is, everything's good.

- Please take your seat.
- What's up?

- You can go ahead and take your seats.

- What's up?

- You can go ahead

and take your seats.
- Take your seats.

Okay. So excited to be here.

- Wagon Wheel Watusi.

- [Both] Wagon Wheel Watusi.

- I love this one, actually.
- Here we go, here we go.

- I know this one.
- Here we go,

into the chair.

Okay. I need you to lift.

- Spot me.
- Fuck.

- Okay.
- Fuck. I need you-

- Take a seat.
- Ow, ow.

- I'm coming down.
- Charlie horse.

- Charlie Horse. Okay.
- Charlie Horse.

- Seeing double Charlie.
- I have to say,

seeing this in person really is a marvel.

I was a huge fan as a kid

of the Excitements.
- Greg!

- Charlotte!
- Greg!

- Vic!

- Okay, here we go.

1, 2, 3.

- Wow.

And so I'm gonna go ahead and help.

Right?
- Here we go.

- And then I'm here too.

And it's the three of us.

How fun.
- I'm gassed.

- What an entrance. Ah!

I can't believe we're here.

We were trying to book you last season

and your agent said uh-uh,
don't even think about it.

Don't know what you are,

don't know what you do.

And now you're here.

- Last year was tough, booking-wise.

- Of course, us too.

You two are famously-
- That's good.

What do you guys use?

- Is that real coffee?
- Folgers?

- Folgers?
- Is this instant?

- I don't know.
- Is this instant?

- Individual package.
- You showed up for instant.

- I think probably it was just

sort of normal.
- Drink as much as you can.

- Coffee. Okay, wow.

How about this?
(both slurping)

We'll send you home with
some coffee. How about that?

Okay. You all right?

- I guess.

- I was a huge fan of you as a duo.

I've followed your career.

You two and your love
for each other really,

I think has helped me and my marriage.

And watching you two always
working things out really

has meant so much to me.

- You read our book.

- I did read your book.

- Love Lasts Forever.
- I did.

- Except when it doesn't,

- Which is the sequel. We are divorced.

- I'm sorry?

- Amicably.

Proudly, happily.

- Legally.
- Legally,

we are no longer a married couple.

- What?

- But we are still domestic partners.

- Yeah.
- So you're together still?

- No.

- We no longer share rings,

but we are-

- [Both] In the ring!

- This Thursday night,
(explosive music)

parking lot of the MGM Grand.

Please come. Please bring $20.

Cash.
- There's a parking lot

at the MGM Grand?
- Caesar's.

- Caesar's, fuck!

- Yeah, I know.

I don't look like it, I'm a big wrestling

aficionado myself.

I like to fancy myself-
- Can you pass

the whole bowl?
- Again, we can send you

home with a bag of these.

You don't have to take 'em right now.

- Vic, I would be delighted
to get a bag of this.

And you just have to understand
that we've been lied to

by a lot of daytime talk show hosts.

- [Vic] I'm sorry to hear that.

- [Izzy] And they say we'll give you a bag

and then they don't give you a bag.

- And you're gonna go
ahead and keep those now.

- I don't have pockets, Vic.
- Yeah, I'm sorry.

We need to go back.

19 years old, 19 years old.

And you meet in college,

you get in a fight in the
parking lot, you start rumbling,

all of a sudden you kiss
and you fall in love.

That starts the Excitement Dynasty,

partners in both the
house and in the ring.

Everybody loves you. You
got this great duo going on.

You release a book.
Everyone's very excited.

What happened?

- Wow. Is it cliche to say life happened?

- Yes. (laughing)

- I cheated, a lot.
- You know, I-

A lot.
- Okay.

- Some people aren't meant for monogamy.

- No, Charlotte's not.

And I extremely am, so I
was devastated every time.

- Oh, right.
- And I said,

you got 10 chances.

- And he gave me 15.
- And we blew through

that 15th in short fucking order.

- But what is so beautiful
about fighting, physically,

making a relationship,
building that trust together,

breaking it apart.

- Here's my trust. You're
sort of lifting it up.

And then this, my knee is
16 cases of infidelity.

Bam! Trust shattered.
- Shattered.

- If you're giving 15, 16 chances,

why not just continue to give chances?

- Yeah, so someone who's
been in two car crashes,

why don't they keep crashing
their car every day?

- Well, that would be my question.

I'd probably take away their license.

- And so we're taking
away the marriage license.

- [Both] Boom!

- That's what's up.

- I have to say, I've been such
a fan for such a large time,

and it's nice to see a
divorce that is ending

so well, it seems.

- The marriage was obliterated.

Our sexual life has
never been more powerful.

- So you are still seeing
each other intimately?

- No.
- No.

- Okay.
- I have to keep

my eyes closed.

- So my question is, how do we decide

to continue wrestling after such betrayal?

- How can we not?

- Life is a series of rings

and these rings are actually squares.

They're not rings at all.

- Huh?
- And they have

ropes on the side.

- Sure.
- And the ropes

separate the match from not the match,

even though in almost every match,

stuff happens outside the ring.

- I see.
- What that tells me

is you're allowed to go

outside of that ring a couple times.

Maybe it's 16.
- Or 17.

- Okay. Wow, I had a
poster of you in my room.

- I have no say over this.

- Right, I didn't think you did.

- I'm gonna head out.
- Okay. Well, no, hold on.

Wait, okay. And so we do,
and the door's locked.

So he is gonna have to
sort of loop back around.

- What's your deal?

- Can I ask you a question?

What made you decide to leave?

Was it him that ended the relationship

or was it you that said

that it was over?
- He ended it.

- But what made you like
brave enough to sort of like,

follow your passion?

Because I gotta say my
husband doesn't like spending

time with me.

- He'll end it.
- Do you think?

- Yeah.
- Hello.

- Where'd you go, silly?
- You know what?

It's important to keep your blood pumping.

And that's for the kids
out there, at home.

Every day, get your
heart rate up. All right?

- I have a couple of questions
for you individually about

what's happening in your lives right now.

Greg, what is happening in your life?

- I'm living in, there's a
HVAC closet at the Holiday Inn.

- I see.
- That's where

I'm camped at the moment.

Just because our communal
home, our shared home,

we each sort of said to
ourselves as the marriage ends

so too does the home end.

Let us sort of set this off
like a viking long ship,

into the night, let it burn.

Ultimately, neither of
us live there anymore.

- Well, Charlotte, that brings me to you.

What is your private life
looking like these days?

- Well, I stay at the
home pretty exclusively,

but I also-
- So you are doing that?

- Yeah.
- Okay, cool.

- And so this seems like it's news

to you, Greg.
- Finding out now.

But that's okay,

because honestly as business partners,

you can't micromanage each other.

- Yeah.
- Now, I was wondering,

you two have a very
famous wrestling routine

that you've gotten throughout your career

where you hold hands at all times and,

yep, that's...

At all times,

you're holding hands and
it culminates with you two

sort of ferociously
making out on the floor.

So I assume that the
wrestling routine has changed

and we were hoping maybe you
could demonstrate a little bit

of what that looks like today.

(upbeat instrumental music)

- Talk to me about how
bad your husband is.

- Oh, he's not bad. He's not bad.

I think sometimes in a
relationship it's about

what you both wanna get out of it.

And for me it's sort of security

and making sure that I can do the things-

- Is this real glass?

- Yes.
- Great.

- Okay, and so that and
my grandmother, okay.

It's in his pants. Wonderful.

Well ladies and gentlemen,
folks and people,

this is very special debuting

of the Excitement routine.

- Can we actually bring in those seats?

Can we bring those chairs in?

- Okay. Wonderful.

Well I'm gonna take a
seat in the corner here

if that's all right.

Front row seat. I used to
dream about this as a kid.

Actually this is a very
exciting day for me.

You know, my parents got divorced

and so I said maybe I
can have a relationship

like them one day.

- Yeah.
- Absolutely.

Okay, here we go.

What is this, book?
- It's a book.

- Cool.

Fuck, my tassels.
- Greg!

- Sorry!

I'm literally doing
the best that I can do.

- I know, I know you are.

- I love you.
- I used to love you.

- I'm getting there.

Business partner. Okay.

- Okay.

- The way this move begins is this.

You come, you cross your wrists. Okay?

And that is the unbroken knot
of love. This can't break.

It can only break if someone lets go

and we're never gonna let go.

Okay? Oh, well.

And then down, leg up, other leg.

- Wow.
- Up vertical. Okay?

And now what's gonna happen is
Charlotte is gonna come down

and she's gonna donkey kick
me right in the head or chest.

- Okay. I'm gonna-
- Okay?

- Let's pause, let's pause that there.

Well, it's a little bit
of wish fulfillment.

I was wondering if maybe I could play

sort of the heel in this situation.

- Yeah. Okay, you can play the heel.

- Okay.
- Charlotte's gonna come in,

Charlotte's gonna get you every time.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- So I'm newer to wrestling.

I might need a little
bit of guidance here.

- We're gonna cuck him.
- Okay.

- One, two, alright.
- Because that's what love is.

- 1, 2, 3.

We're gonna cuck him!
- We're gonna cuck him!

- Oh shit!
(chair slams)

- Okay, okay.
- Now, hop up.

You sit down.
- Okay.

They're professionals, folks,

so let's all calm down.
- Martha. Martha.

- Yep, I'm not Martha, my name is Vic.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- Then you come down.
- Okay.

- And you go with the flow.

- Okay, so I'm just-
- Yeah. Great.

- And then as the heel,

I can sort of then, okay,

and then I just, okay, wow.

- There's the heel, great.
- And then you pretend

nobody's here.

- Pretend nobody's here? What do you mean?

- Not even Greg.
- Okay.

- Not even-
- Just do this one,

and this one down,

'cause it's better for camera.

- That's good.
- Okay.

And then so I just sort of lean.

- Yeah.
- And I go.

- Then you embrace.
- Oh, wow.

- God just,
(sticks break)

it just feels really
good to watch wrestling.

- Your heart is beating so fast.

- So fast.
- And now-

- I have hypertension.

- As the heel does this,
here's another move you can do.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- What's gonna happen is I'm going

to climb on this table

and physically, for real
in real life, jump as hard

as I can and land on them.

- Okay, so we're gonna
sort of pause there.

I think we got the demonstration.

- Okay, I'm physically take
my real 200 plus pound body

and slam into everybody in the room.

- And I'm seeing a lot of faces here

go we don't wanna see that.

That'd be bad TV, I think.
- Cast and crew.

- Wagon wheel.
- Okay.

- Right right, here we go.

- Wagon wheel.
- Wagon wheel.

- Well that was just amazing, folks, huh?

I mean, come on.

Real life wrestling.
(board thuds)

- It didn't work.
- Didn't break.

So, ha. Amazing.
- Can we do a number two

on that?
(board thuds)

Okay.
- How about I try?

- No no, no.
- Greg, Greg.

- Charlotte needs to see me get this.

- Okay.
- I can't see.

- Charlotte, please look up.

- I can't.
- Look up.

- You know, that's all the time we got.

This sad thing could go on forever.

- Greg, I can't put my head up.

Your dance belt is too filled with donuts

and Werther's.
- God damn it.

Hey, alright, let's get
that chair back in there.

- Okay, Greg.

You go ahead and bring the
furniture back in, PA's.

Wow. Do you need help, hand?

- Yeah.
- Okay.

That was amazing.
- Yeah.

- Thank you for that.
- You're welcome.

- I loved that.

- My apartment is just outside of Vegas,

- What is that? Balsa?
- God.

- That balsa?
- Okay, so-

- How are you?
- This is nice.

- I'm good. I'm whole.

And I feel like we taught wrestling,

which is what matters to me.

- Exhilarating stuff.

I feel like I've learned
so much about wrestling,

and the culture and myself.

- This Thursday night,
(exciting thunderous music)

Charlotte and I are gonna
be right in the parking lot

of Caesar's Palace.

And now you can count on one
thing and one thing only.

That's we're gonna put on
a hell of a show. Okay?

- I feel like you're so
in touch with the space,

and your bodies in a way that is just

so exciting to see.

And even though you're not together,

there's something that binds you.

- Can I actually say that?
I take issue with that.

Because we are together.

Are we together as man and wife?

- No. - Married in front of
God and in front of our family.

- You made pretty clear you are not.

- Yeah, no. For sure.
- No, we're not.

- Right.
- Are we still

united by the government?

Yes, we are both part of
an LLC as business partners

for our publishing business.

And we have written over 48 books.

- Well, I mean maybe
we could take a look at

some of the books here.

I'm sure viewers are familiar
with some of the big ones.

- Oh yeah. Matrimony
SmackDown, Suplex to Duplex,

Renovating as a Married Wrestling Couple.

- [Izzy] CTEntertainment,

How You Can Make Brain
Damage Work For You.

- [Brennan] Face Turn,
the Secret to Cunnilingus.

- Is the secret to Cunnilingus

that you weren't doing it very well?

Don't gasp.

- That wasn't the problem.
- Sorry.

It was, you know, I
dunno what came over me.

- The beautiful 11 years
that we shared, I would say

cut that number well in
half if I'm not doing

what I'm doing downtown.

- Well?
- That was not the problem.

If anything,

that was the fucking
thread we were hanging on.

- I'd say six years of that
you were munch munching.

- Call me Pac-Man.

(Pac-man munching noises)

- Okay, fun.

- For a little while I had
to get my jaw wired shut.

I could not speak and I had
to drink through my nose.

- When we do these
appearances, it's important

to talk about the wire

and that we had to wire
his jaw shut from all

of the pussy eating.

And that's because wrestlers
don't get healthcare.

- Which is why you can go

to GregandCharlotteExcitement.
com/books.getbooks.money

.buybooks.com.

- Well, I mean, that's just
devastating. So no healthcare.

- It's a thing that we
like to talk about a lot.

And if we can actually, can
we zoom in on every camera?

- Can we zoom in on every camera?

- Can we zoom in

on every camera?
- Not this one.

Leave me, leave me

- In this country.

- [Vic] Maybe I just go here.

Well I just, I'll make
sure I'm in the shot.

- Come in.
- Okay.

If you insist.
- Come in as close to me

as you can.
- Okay.

Well I don't, oh, okay.

- You getting comfy?
- Oh yes.

Oh, that's kind of nice actually.

- And this is exactly the kind of move-

- Okay.
- That is gonna

make us win this Thursday night.

Bring a $50 money order.

- You said $20, 10 minutes ago.

- We got a email from a
former business manager

who is suing us, but still represents us

legally from prison.

- Oh.
- And he said it's gotta be 50

bucks now for us to clear.

- I see. Well congratulations.

And I know you'll be seeing
me in that parking lot.

- Okay.
- I know I will.

- Okay. Well, I'll tap out.

- Alright. Hey, tap out.
- That's important.

- That is just absolutely wonderful.

- Sorry. Sorry.
- Oh, a little stuck.

- Where?
- Can we...

- Little help?
- Sorry, I got it.

I got it, you don't have to move.

Here we go.
- Okay.

So what we're gonna go ahead

and do is we are going to
play a little game that we-

- How is it stuck this way, Greg?

- So Greg, I'm gonna go ahead and help.

Here we go.

And so it just seems to be simple

and it's barely even stuck.

- Oh.
- Sorry.

- So there we go.

So Greg, we're gonna go ahead and have you

in the chair over here.
- I'm suffocating

my wife again. Ha Ha.

We're not married!
- We're not married.

- So we're gonna play a game

that we like to call
the Newly Divorced Game.

(mellow music)

Thank you, thank you, thank
you. Thank you so much.

So there you are.
- Thank you so much.

- And there you are.

- And I'm allowed to keep these?

- You may keep them

afterwards if you would like them.

So what's gonna happen is
I'm gonna ask you a question.

You're gonna write down the
answer that you think the other

person would've said as
a newly divorced person.

So we're gonna go ahead with
our first question, which is,

what do we like to do for fun?

Greg Excitement. We just
wrote Greg Excitement.

- Am I autographing these?
- We're not

autographing these.

Though it sounds like
maybe you need the money.

So you can go ahead and sell those.

- You wanna buy one?
- I'll take one.

How about that? I'll take one.

- Great. What'd you do 80 grand?

- For a card with your name on it?

- Would you do 80 grand?
- And this is

your phone number?

You know what, let's gonna,

we're gonna wrap this back up-
- Would your husband

do 80 grand?

- Where is your husband
physically in the studio?

- Oh, my husband is not in the studio.

He is in Taiwan on business.
So he travels a lot.

And I just feel sort of his-

- Can I ask a question?

- Yes.
- How do you

keep the spark alive

with a husband who's rarely in town?

- What is a spark? Right.

- Should we write that on the-
- Nope.

And I have a game and
so I'm taking control.

So go ahead and grab your cards.

- You answer the question

that you had just asked them.

- So, okay.

That is a great idea,

Charlotte.
- Divorce.

- Divorce is how we keep the spark alive.

I see.
- I would say

it really helped our relationship.

- Ah, I'm in charge of the game.

So let's go ahead and

let's answer the questions
that I am asking.

All right?

What is the one piece
of advice you would give

to a newly divorced person?

(mellow game music)

- This is kind of boring.
- And pens down.

Greg, what is advice that you would give

to a newly divorced person?

- Book a wrestling match at
any venue that will have you.

- And I put Greg's favorite color.

- So I feel like we're
not totally understanding

how this game works and that's okay.

- I thought we were gonna do fun ones.

I thought it was gonna be
like, how many hot dogs do you

think you've eaten in your life?

- I thought those
questions were pretty fun.

I thought a lot about those questions.

- Did you think about your
husband when you wrote them?

- Why would I think about my husband?

- How many hot dogs have you had

in your life?
- Guy going on

international business trips,

feels like, you know.

- It's not like he's not not going on

an international business trips.

He wants to be-
- You guys ever

done couples therapy?

- Yes, A lot.

- I think it's a scam.
- Tell me about it.

- You think couples therapy

is a scam?
- There's nothing,

there's no way that couples
therapy can help you.

- Did you get consent?
- What?

- Did you get consent?

- Do I have consent to do what I'm doing?

- Sure.
- Great.

- A little too late.

- Can I ask you a question?

- Yeah. What's up?
- How did you know

it was over?
- Greg?

- It's a great question. I
think I knew it was over.

We talk about infidelity,
we talk about lack

of communication.

But the truth is, is that
those things are often just

symbols of a deeper reality.

Which is that at any
point in time a person

can stop loving you,

and maybe it comes with a dramatic affair,

maybe it comes with them
stealing a bunch of money.

Maybe it comes with lots
of fights or friction.

You are the greatest business partner

and the greatest ex-wife

and the greatest wrestler
there has ever been.

And-
- Fuck.

- There is no place I would rather be

than in the ring with you

or in our shared home, which
I know I'm not allowed in.

- Well that's very exciting.

And we had one last game we'd
like to play with you guys.

It's not a game so much
as I saw you guys came in

with a garbage bag full of items

and we thought maybe we'd
bring them out one by one

and we could sort of decide
how we wanna divvy them up.

- Great. Love that.

- Help out.
(mellow game music)

Well let's go ahead and
bring in the first item.

Thank you so much.

1993 world champion wrestling belt.

You two won this by taking on
the Undertaker's daughters.

What are we doing with
this wrestling belt?

- What I would love is for you

and me to squeeze into that little belt

and I eat your hog.

Like I did right after
that '93 championship,

we put those little Undertakers in a coma.

- We took those two daughters
of world famous wrestler,

the Undertaker, barely
qualified on a medical

to be in that ring.

And we buried them.
- And I buried you.

- So it seems like we've
decided eating hog in that one.

So let's go ahead and
let's get our second item.

- Great.

- Ah, the manuscript for
your unpublished book.

- I don't even know what that one is.

- A lot of pictures.

- The only thing more
glorious than finding someone

to take life's smack
downs in stride with you,

to stand with you at the top rope

and to pile drive your obstacles
is a person who will put

your hog in their mouth

after you hospitalize two extremely weak

first time opponents.

- He's making that up.
- I'm not making

it up, Charlotte.
- Okay, well how about-

- God damn it.

- Thick spine.
- I can't get it.

- Do you need some help?

- You wanna try, sweetie?

- Oh, it's very sweet, actually.

Maybe we don't rip a
book up on camera. Okay.

- All three of us?
- I feel like I should

be in on this.
- 1, 2, 3.

Yeah.
- And I was the only one

that ripped it actually.

- It's like a wishbone.

- And we have one more item,

so let's go ahead and bring that in.

And of course
(item thuds)

your boombox, when you got married,

this was the boombox that you used

to play your wedding song.

What are we doing with the
boombox now that you're divorced?

- I am 100% positive
that this is breakaway

and I'm going to in real
life, pick it up and smash it

on my head. - [off-camera
crew] No no don't break that!

- It's a rental.
- I know it's breakaway.

You telling me it's not breakaway,

'cause you don't believe in me.

- No.
- Because you think

a man who's divorced

doesn't have his life together.

And I know this is breakaway.

I straight up know that
this is gonna break.

- Not breakaway.
- And I want my ex-wife

to smash me in the head.
- If people in this industry

don't stop disrespecting divorced men,

I swear to God we're gonna
cancel all of our events.

- Every divorced man is a hero.

Every divorced man is actually a hero.

- Every divorced man is a hero.

- Get in there sweetie.

- Okay.
- Okay.

I have rapid fire questions!

- Do 'em.
- I can't from here.

- Do 'em.
- If you're divorced,

nothing can stop you.

- Nobody is helping me!

You know what?

Honestly, you two don't seem
like you wanna be apart.

You kind of seem like
you wanna be together.

- That's the key to divorce.

(mellow theme music)

- Rapid fire questions. Here we go.

Do you have any allergies?

- Werther's Originals.
- Pussy.

- Alright, what is a place
you would love to visit?

- Croatia.
- Why?

- That's where his parents are from.

(Brennan speaks in Croatian)

- Is the glass half empty or half full?

- Hey, so,

is the glass half empty
or is it half full?

(gentle dramatic music)

You tell me babe. Is the glass half empty?

Is this the end or is it half full?

- Sorry, seeming like maybe
there's a bigger metaphor here.

- It feels pretty full to me.

- Okay, wow. Oh, okay.

- My ex-wife wants you.

- And finally I have one
last question that I have

to ask you that I ask all of my guests

and that is, what is the meaning of life?

- Caesar's Palace, Thursday night.

- Bring a hundred dollars.

- What do we do from here? Where do we go?

- HVAC.
- Closet?

- Yep.
- I'll meet you there.

That's all for that we have today.

My name is Vic Michaelis, and
remember, be true to yourself

unless you'd rather be someone else.

Goodnight. Goodnight.

- I agree. And affirm this.
- Goodnight.

How does this go?
- You come here.

- Okay. And then I'm up.

Okay, well-
- Everybody get out.

- I'm like a bird.
- Everybody get out.

- You heard them, get out!

(exciting theme music)

(exciting theme music continues)

(exciting theme music continues, fades)

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