All language subtitles for The Avengers S03E25 1080p WEB DL H264 BTN_track3_[eng]

- Sergeant.
- One step forward, march.

What's this?

- Dandruff, sir.
- On report.

One step backward, march.

Squad, present arms!

Slope arms!

All present and correct, sir.

Carry on, Captain Trench.

TRENCH: Squad...

Load.

RIFLES COCKING

Aim.

Fire!

GUNSHOTS RING

Unload!

GUNS CLACKING

Slope arms!

About turn!

SOLDIER PLAYING BAGPIPES
Prepare...

Step left!

Left, left, left, right, left.

Left, left...

Number five's free now.

Excuse me.

Number five is free now.
- Ah. Thank you very much.

Excuse me.
OPENS DOOR

There you are.
You put them in there.

I thought these machines were
supposed to be wholly automatic.

Yeah, the housewife like to feel

she's taking
some part in the process.

- Oh.
- There you are.

What are those for?

When the red light
comes on for the first time,

you put the first load of soap in.

When it comes on
for the second time,

you put the second soap in there.

That's quite an adventure.

Why don't you get
your batman to do it for you?

He's down with a chill.

There's Captain Trench's batman.

You look after him,
he'll look after you.

Private Jessop, sir. I'm doing
some of Captain Trench's things.

I suppose I could look
after you, sir, no?

That's extremely good of you.

Oh, hold on a sec.

There we are.

Oh, that's very nice of you, sir.

You come here often?

A lot of the lads
use this place, sir.

It's better than
the regimental laundry.

They make a terrible
mess of your things.

That's worth knowing.

You're new here, aren't you, sir?

- That's right.
- Aye.

Although it is
a civvy establishment,

we like to give Angela
a bit of support.

- Angela?
- Mrs Craig.

She's a widow of
one of the corporals here.

Widow? Oh, what happened
to the corporal?

He had an accident
cleaning his rifle.

Didn't you hear about it?

Oh, yes, I recall
something about that.

It was very hard luck,
right through the heart.

She was pretty cut up
about it at the time,

but she's back on her feet
now she's got this place.

Oh, she owns it, eh?

Yeah, the lads had a whip round
and bought it for her, sir.

Well, that's some whip round.

The officers did
most of the whipping.

BOTH CHUCKLE

Oh, they're a grand bunch here, sir.

There's a fine esprit de corps,
if you get my meaning.

- There she goes.
- Oh, oh, allow me.

There. That didn't hurt, did it?
HE CHUCKLES

Ah, you needn't get up, Trench.

After all, I'm no longer
a serving officer.

No, sir, not at the moment.
- And what are you doing?

- I'm working on a field manoeuvre.
- Has it been approved?

HQ agree with the overall plan.

The fine details
have been left to me.

I take it I have you
to thank for that, sir.

I did have a quiet word
with Brigadier Gatling.

He agreed that the main purpose
of the exercise

is to allow the maximum
amount of initiative

to the younger officers.

Of course, I had to promise
to keep an eye on you.

Your artillery units are rather
poorly clustered, aren't they?

TRENCH: It's the problem
of sighting.

There are field positions
from the Southland that approach it.

Blackheath, Richmond Park.

Not very much
from the north and west?

It's very little open country.

What about Hampstead Heath,
Parliament Hill.

There's a perfect position,

direct line of fire
right across the city.

If we can penetrate that far.

What the devil's
your light armour doing?

They could be down the A1
and into hiding in three hours.

There'll be heavy civilian traffic.

Well, get it off the road.

If you're gonna worry about
civilian traffic, Trench,

you're beaten before you begin.

But this is only an exercise, sir.

Simulated battle conditions, Trench.

Take the word of an old hand,
"Clear the roads

"and occupy the high ground."
- Yes, sir.

Now what about the Air Force?

The number 4 parachute detachment
is standing by to take Heathrow.

If you get a strong wind, they'll be
scattered all over the city.

- If the transports come in low...
- Infantry, Trench, infantry.

The only man
you can depend on in battle

is the man with two feet
on the ground.

Bayonet in his hands.
KNOCK ON DOOR

Come in.

Ah, this will be the early surveys.
Thank you.

Oh, and when did you
have them taken?

Yesterday afternoon, sir.

Good thinking, Trench,
good thinking.

Key objective's
in central London, sir.

STUART-BOLLINGER: Oh, yes.
What's this one?

Buckingham Palace, sir.

Oh, so it is. Yes, so it is.

I suppose it never occurred to you

that you don't put leather
in a washing machine?

Oh, really, why not?

Cows must get wet sometimes.
They don't run.

They're not dyed.

Tell you what I'll do,

take 'em straight back
and give 'em a thorough bleaching.

Don't worry, just swipe
somebody else's next time.

"In the First World War,
the Highland Guard

"took part in the assault
on Vimy Ridge

"and was reduced to three officers,
12 men and two horses,

"thus achieving undying fame."

- An unfortunate choice of words.
- "They re-formed and fought

"with distinguished gallantry
throughout the Second World War,

"and are now stationed at
Maroon Barracks, South Kensington."

- That's handy.
- Aren't you interested?

Should I be? Or more to the point,

you can tell me something
about Captain Trench.

Well, he's the adjutant
of the regiment.

He made out the report
on Corporal Craig's death.

Now, Corporal Craig,
according to the report,

was cleaning an automatic rifle,

the thing went off,

and fired three shots
into his chest.

Three, that's careless.

Army Intelligence thought so, too.

They took the precaution of exhuming
his body a very short time ago

and they found
that the three bullets

had been fired by different rifles.

Why can't Army Intelligence
handle it themselves?

Well, it has rather
wider implications.

Now what I want you to do

is to get in touch
with Captain Trench

and kind of, well,
infiltrate the regiment.

Won't I be noticed?

Ah, hah!

He runs all sorts of extra
activities, you know,

Civil Defence, for instance.

Meals on Wheels, that sort of thing?

And do you know that his team
run a very good form of instruction.

They even have unarmed combat.

How very fortuitous.
HE CHUCKLES

All right, lads.
Now as far as a rear attack goes...

All right, Collins.

You wouldn't last long
with that approach.

Use your other arm.
Left arm for the stranglehold,

right hand free to get the rifle.
Now, try it again.

MAN COUGHS
Let me show you.

All right, Sergeant.

SERGEANT: Sir. Try this one again.

- Can I help you?
- I hope so.

This is the Civil Defence
Centre, isn't it?

- Yes, it is, yes.
- Oh, good.

I've just enrolled at the Town Hall.

They told me to come straight here.
- They've made a mistake.

Oh, why?

Well, ladies' classes
are held in the evenings,

after-bond care, field kitchens,
that sort of thing.

Tuesdays and Thursdays,
I think it is.

Oh, but I've enrolled for
the unarmed combat course.

Oh.

Oh, well, then you have
come to the right place.

My name is Trench. And yours?

Gale, Mrs Catherine Gale.

Right, Mrs Gale.

Do you know anything at all
about unarmed combat?

A little.

Well, I suppose we could try you
on a few simple holds.

Sergeant Marsh.
- Sir?

Have a breather, boys.

This is Mrs Gale.
She'll be joining the course.

How do you do?

Now, Mrs Gale,
supposing, for example,

you were faced with a knife attack.

Now, how would you deal with that?

- Frontal or rear?
- Let's say frontal.

Assume the sergeant here
has a knife.

- Kind of heavy, sir.
- So sorry.

Are you all right?
- Very good.

Now, let's try a surprise
attack from the rear.

TRAINEES LAUGH

Excellent. That will be all for now.

- Thank you.
- Pleasure, Mrs Gale.

That'll be all, Sergeant.

MARSH: All right, boys.

May I asked where
you learned, Mrs Gale?

In Edinburgh.
An uncle of mine taught me.

He seems to have made
a good job of it.

Did he teach you anything else?

Yes, a little swordwork,
backsword mainly.

Really?

Yes, I was trained with a claymore.

That's unusual.

Really, it's a family heirloom.

One of my ancestors fought

with Charles Edward Stuart
at Prestonpans.

That's interesting. Which clan?

Clanranald of Moidart.

Hmm. Mrs Gale,
you should meet my, er,

my colonel, the honorary colonel
of my regiment.

He's, er,
his ancestors were Stuarts.

- Really? Yes, I'd like to.
- Would this evening be too soon?

This evening?

Yes, we're having a regimental
cocktail party

in the mess hall.
Perhaps you'd care to be my guest.

Yes, I'd like to.

BAGPIPES MUSIC PLAYING

PEOPLE CHATTING INDISTINCTLY

Ah, yes, indeed that was in '18
just before the Armistice.

No, it couldn't have been, my dear,

because you remember
Kim was wounded in the July.

Well, anyway he could
come down the line

to inspect our forward positions,
you see,

and Kim had rigged up
some kind of rudimentary shower bath

in one of the trenches,
and there he was

standing naked
as on the day he was born.

Would you like
another whiskey, dear?

Yes, of course. Ah, yes.

All of a sudden,

this staff lieutenant
comes marching in, you see.

"Excuse me, sir," he says,

"but Field Marshal Haig
would like a word with you."

"Send him in," Kim said.

And there you are standing
without a stitch of clothing on,

and in marches Haig.

Eh, red as a beetroot, of course.

- Captain Trench.
- Lady Bollinger.

I'm sorry I'm late, Colonel.

Oh, yes, trust you to butt in
and spoil a good story, eh?

- I'm sorry, sir.
- Well, now, don't go away

before you've introduced us
to your lady friend.

Mrs Catherine Gale, Lady Bollinger.

- How do you do?
- Brigadier General.

Sir Ian Stuart-Bollinger,
honorary colonel of the regiment.

Oh, how do you do?
And this is Major Steed.

He used to be in the tank corps
before he was bowler-hatted.

- How do you do? Nice to meet you.
- Pleasure's mine.

Yes, Major Steed
is writing a history

of the Highland regiments.

I'm just giving him
a little bit of background.

Would you like a drink, Mrs Gale?

- Yes, thank you.
- Excuse me,

the band would like to know
if there's any special tune

you'd like them to play?

Well, let's have the old
Jacobite battle hymn,

'The White Cockade,' unless any of
you has any objections, of course?

I'm sure Mrs Gale hasn't.

One of her antecedents
fought with Charles Edward.

- Oh, ho.
- Lord Cameron of Loch Eil.

Oh, then you're more
than welcome here, eh?

'The Braes of Mar', yes.

Trench, let's have
'The White Cockade.'

My dear, we really ought to go
and talk to the Fergusons.

They've been trying to
get your attention all evening.

Oh, yes, of course. Well, Steed,

I shall have to ask you
to excuse us.

Now, you look after Mrs Gale.

I haven't finished that story.
I'm coming back.

I'm coming back.
- It'll be a pleasure.

- Now, perhaps, you'll explain.
- Explain what?

I spent the whole afternoon
with that crashing bore Trench

because you wanted me to
infiltrate the regiment.

Now I find it was
a sheer waste of a time.

Why?
BAGPIPES PLAYING

You seem to have got wrapped in
before I even arrived.

That's army tactics.
It's a pincer movement.

You take care of Trench,
I get pally with the general.

Given a choice,
I think I prefer the general.

Well, you've caught his eye anyway,
for the evening, a good thing.

What do you think
he's got to do with Corporal Craig?

He's been retired
from the regiment for five years.

With his record. He has
a good deal of influence here,

particularly on this army exercise.

If you'd glean a few details for me
if you get the opportunity.

You were saying, Major Steed,
about the attack on Bizerte?

Yes, we were going
along the coast road,

and Rommel opened fire with his
.75 millimetres on our right flank.

- From the sea, Major?
- I beg your pardon?

If you were bouncing along
the coast road to Bizerte,

your right flank
would've been the Mediterranean.

- JOHN: We went round in circles.
- TRENCH: I don't recall that.

Were you there, young man?

No. I've learned
about the Desert Campaign.

Don't believe all you read.

The complexities of the campaign
will be revealed in my next volume.

I'll send you an advance copy.
Excuse me, Mrs Gale.

Everybody seems to have
a different version.

Yes, I suppose everybody
sees a battle differently.

Ah, Trench, go and rescue
my poor wife, will you?

That blasted Ferguson woman's
got her trapped there in a corner.

- Yes, sir.
- Where's Steed?

I was telling him
some of the exploits

of my wilder colleagues
in the Highland brigade

in the Great War,
but I don't suppose

you're interested in that, Mrs Gale.

Well, as a matter of fact, I am.

I've just finished reading
Bentall's 'History of World War I.'

- I found it fascinating.
- Oh, how interesting.

Who is she?

- Who?
- You know who. That blonde.

Oh, Mrs Gale. Just a friend.

Well, be careful.

You're beginning to behave
like an officer.

Be a pity if I had to
return you to the ranks.

Who goes there?

Goodness me, I'm terribly sorry.

I'm a friend. Er, I've lost my way.

I only want to find
my way back to the mess.

Sorry, I was having
a little breather here

and couldn't find my way back.

Right down there, left at the end.

That's very good of you, thank you.

- Good night.
- ASQUITH: Night, sir.

Cigarette, Henry?

What's come over you?

Ah, well, make the most of it.

What did that
toffee-nosed bloke want?

He was looking for the mess.

Said he'd lost his way.

Well, he would, wouldn't he?

Well, as far as I can
make out from the general,

the major objectives
of the exercise are these.

Highly desirable.

The central telegraph office,
St. Martin's Le Grand,

the Air Ministry, the Admiralty,
the War Office,

the Ministry of Defence
and New Scotland Yard.

- And that tallies.
- Tallies with what?

With the military requirements
they submitted

to the War Office for approval.

- How do you know?
- I just been looking at 'em.

If you already know, there's not
much point in my going on, is there?

Well, we'll just compare
notes, see if they check.

Suppose you tell me what you know?

It's called Operation Claymore.

Now, surprise me.

It's to start two hours
before dawn next Wednesday.

Its prime reason
is the mock defence of London

against imaginary enemy attack.

What's the ultimate
purpose of the show?

Huh. Keep the troops on their toes,
I should think.

War Office are very keen on
these peacetime manoeuvres.

They go to a lot of trouble.

What's all this got to do
with Corporal Craig?

Very little as far as I can see,

and this evening
produced nothing positive.

- What are you gonna do now?
- Return to barracks.

I thought you'd have had enough.
I certainly have.

When the bugle sounds,
duty calls, and there I am.

Oh, well, if you feel that way,
you might as well reenlist.

I'm waiting for
a national emergency for that.

For the moment,
I'm doing a little recce.

Anything you want
to draw from stores?

Yes, but I doubt if you'd issue it.

SHE LAUGHS

Who goes there?

Captain Trench.

Everything all quiet, Asquith?
- Aye, sir, all quiet, sir.

Carry on.

STONE CLATTERS

ASQUITH YELLS

HE SIGHS

You hungry, Major Steed?

How much ammunition was there
in the cookhouse?

JOHN: Enough to fight
an entire campaign.

I presume there is an official
ammunition store at Maroon Barracks.

Well, of course, there is.

There's a little private enterprise
within the regiment.

Private Jessop?

JOHN: It's hardly likely,
I wouldn't think.

Well, he was the one
who took the bribe.

Precisely. He had me
at the point of a gun.

If the stuff had been his,
I doubt if I'd be here now.

Can you imagine a private
nicking the contents of an arsenal,

taking over a cookhouse, ha,

and mounting a guard over it?

It would certainly earn him
the Outward Bound prize

for individual initiative.

It just earned him 50 quid from me.

Surely only an officer can authorise
the mounting of a guard.

- JOHN: Trench.
- Oh, Steed!

There are about 30 other officers
in the regiment. Why pick on him?

A, cos he's the adjutant.
He must know about the guard.

B, I saw him checking the sentry,
and C, cos it could explain.

Corporal Craig's death.
- What could?

Well, Corporal Craig
could have stumbled on the cookhouse

the same way as I did
and not been lucky enough

to find anyone as
conveniently corrupt as Jessop.

And was shot there and then.

With three different rifles?

Have you found out yet who he is?

Oh, he's definitely an ex-officer.

Are you sure?

Of course I'm sure.
You can always tell.

Major Steed's a gentleman.

But what's he always
hanging around for?

Well, you know, they tell
he's writing a book.

What on, laundry?

JOHN: Ow! Oh!

Are you all right, sir?

I don't know whether you can do
any better with it.

I'll give you a hand, sir.
It's quite simple.

There you are.

Must have got badly stuck.

There she goes.
- There you are.

Ah, you're a clever girl,
aren't you?

Wonderful.

We'll win the campaign here
at this rate.

That's beautiful.
- There we are.

Anyway, I'll have a good
night's sleep, won't I?

Thank you very much,
my dear. Extremely.

Oh, no, I've gone and ruined
the entire thing.

You'll never do it that way, sir.
Look, just lift one end up.

Oh, really, I'm sorry.

There you are.

Now, just bring your end to me.

Ah, simple when you know how.

Just...

Do you happen to know
that your husband was murdered?

I beg your pardon?

Or was it because he was frightened
of your boyfriend?

I don't know what
you're talking about.

You and Captain Trench
used to go together

when he was a corporal in Aldershot.

Then Corporal Craig came along,

you married him instead,
and Trench never forgave him.

Who told you all this?

You tried to still go with Trench,

hoping that your husband
wouldn't find out,

but he did and he thumped Trench
all around the barracks.

Let go of me.

Complicit in a murder that could
put you away for a long time.

Murder? My husband was executed.

He was a traitor.

Unarmed combat
is to prevent your antagonist

from crying out
and giving the alarm.

Now, where would you say was
the most important part of the body

to concentrate on
in order to achieve that?

The throat, I imagine.

Almost correct,
the larynx to be exact.

Let me give you an example.

I'll just use a very slight pressure
and you'll see what I mean.

Am I hurting?

Mrs Gale.

Oh, that's what I call
the true Highland spirit, lass.

You mustn't stand any
nonsense from Trench, you know.

He is a good soldier,
but he was born

on the wrong side of the tropic.

I'll, er, go and get changed.

Er, It's you I really
wanted to see, Mrs Gale.

Oh, what about?

I wonder...

I wonder if you would
meet me in the mess after lunch?

All right.

I don't know my husband insists

on having all these
trophies on display

every time he throws
a regimental party.

It only means I've got
to take them all home again.

I'm sure he's proud of them.
Oh, isn't that a Jacobean goblet?

- Yes, it is.
- May I see it?

I'm afraid I can't be
very much help to you, Major Steed.

I'm sure you can be a great help,
Lady Bollinger.

It's not just factual research
I'm after.

It's personal experiences. I want my
book to come alive. You know?

- Oh, yes.
- I'm interested in your husband.

I'm gonna devote
an entire chapter to him.

Shouldn't you be directing your
questions to him rather than me?

Oh, he's so, what's the word,

deferential about his achievements.

SHE LAUGHS
Oh, do you really think so?

Well, I suppose he has done
a very good deal for his country.

And still is, despite the fact
that he's retired.

I'm afraid you touched
on rather a sore point there, Major.

You would've liked him
to retire completely?

The extraordinary thing is
he did to begin with.

For two years he had
no contact with the army.

He was immersed in his studies.

- What studies?
- Why, Scottish history.

It became his absorbing passion.

Do you know he even
wanted us to retire

to the Highlands?
HE LAUGHS

Well, I'm afraid
I wouldn't hear of it.

I should miss London dreadfully.
- Of course.

Then he got into lineage
and tracing clan antecedents,

finally down
to our adopted son, James.

I don't quite see
the connection?

Neither did I,
and I can assure you,

neither did
the College of Heralds.

But he simply regards that
as Sassenach antagonism.

- You mean...
- He has decided

he has definite proof
that our son James

is the rightful heir
to the throne of Scotland

and thus the throne
of England as well.

What does your son think about this?

James? Well, I'm afraid
he couldn't care less.

He seems perfectly happy
in his chosen profession.

Which is?

Well, we don't usually
talk about this

outside the family, Major,
but he's a bookmaker in Halifax.

Oh.

We should never
have sent him to Eton.

To return to your husband's
renewed military interests...

Well, the two seem to be connected.
Now, that's what worries me.

But as I said, he is convinced

that the Stuarts were
cheated of the throne.

And that your son, the bookmaker...

Well, precisely.

The military side will
be purely our concern.

When this phase has been
accomplished, however,

we shall naturally count on your
support to consolidate positions.

That might not be as easy.

I can only guarantee
a cruiser spot-and-look,

because it's under my command,

but I can't speak for
the rest of the home fleet.

I understood they were on
manoeuvres off the Azores.

They are, but they're within
range of carrier-based aircraft,

and the Med fleet's closer.

It'll be under steam
in Gibraltar Wednesday morning.

They'll take an order
from the Admiralty.

Precisely, the whole lot will
be back in the Channel by Saturday.

I don't think you fully understand.

By eight o'clock on Wednesday,
the Admiralty will be in our hands.

You don't think the First Sea Lord's

gonna order the fleet to heave to
because you tell him to.

By 8:30 you will be
the First Sea Lord,

just as Bruce here will be
the Air Chief Marshal,

and Duncan over there in charge
of all marine forces.

What about political administration?

There won't be any
political administration.

How the devil
are you going to run the country?

The country will be placed
under the sovereignty

of the Royal House of Stuart
with military and naval advisors.

I'll go along with that, but I'm
doubtful you can pull it off.

You don't have the forces available.

How many men
had Charles Edward Stuart

when he drove the Hanoverians
down from the Highlands to Derby?

A mere handful! I've got a regiment.

Yes, but you're up against
modern atomic weapons.

They're useless, Harry, useless,
the whole damn lot of them,

because nobody dares
to let them off.

By the time my men
are in key positions,

the only way to get them out
will be by hand-to-hand fighting.

By that time it'll be too late
because we shall be in power.

Gentlemen, I give you a toast.

To the Royal House of Stuart.

GLASSES SHATTER
ALARM BELL RINGS

- What is it?
- Fire in the barracks, sir.

- Where's the fire?
- Down the corridor.

Right. See what can be done
about this immediately.

FIRE ALARM CONTINUES RINGING

Major Steed, you're under arrest.

Not again.

Guard.

Oh, I'm terribly sorry to have
kept you waiting, Mrs Gale.

We had a little bit of a fracas
over in the admin block.

Yes, I heard the fire alarm.
Nothing serious, I hope?

No, it's all under control
now, thank you.

Good. What was it you
wanted to see me about?

Well, I think we should
talk in my office.

Oh, I didn't know
you had an office here.

No, officially, since I'm retired,

I haven't got an office
in the barracks,

but you know I like a pied-a-terre,

and the adjutant let me
have this little place.

I've fitted it out myself.

After you, Mrs Gale.
- Thank you.

- Well, now, can I get you a drink?
- Thank you.

- Whiskey?
- That'll be fine.

I've got something
rather special here.

I had it sent all the way down
from Aberdeen.

It's 25 years old
and very finely blended.

There you are.
- Thank you.

- Slainte.
- Slainte.

Now, what do you think
of my collection?

Very fine.

No, it won't always be
like this, Mrs Gale,

hiding my treasures away
in a cupboard.

In order to avoid being made
an object of ridicule.

I intend to retire to Inverness

and start living the sort of life
I've always wanted

with all my clansmen around me

and a thousand acres of moor
under my feet.

I'm tired of being an exile
from my native land

and as soon as this is over...

As soon as what's over, General?

Mrs Gale,

have you ever tried to trace
your family history?

Once, but I gave up
when I got to my great-grandfather.

Well, I've taken the trouble
to go a good bit further than that.

When Trench told me that you were...

you were a Clanranald,

I thought he was putting it
all on for my benefit,

but I'm not quite such an old fool
as he seems to think, you know.

I never thought you were.

No, look at these lineage charts,
Mrs Gale.

How on earth did you
manage to compile these?

I got them from the curator
of the Bruce Museum in Kinross.

He's probably
the most learned Highland historian

in the whole country.

He's a very good friend of mine.

Can you follow that?
- Mm-hm. Just about.

You see, it shows a pure line
right back to Kirsten of Moidart

in the 15th century.

Clanranald, as you see,

became the MacDonalds of Clanranald.

And the MacDonalds of Clanranald
harboured Charles Edward Stuart

when he returned from France
to lead the Jacobites.

Yes, I did know that.

What you probably did not know

was that Charles Stuart had
a bastard son by Agnes MacDonald,

your 18th grandmother.

No, that's news to me.

It's always been a close secret.

General, I don't quite see
what you're getting at.

Look at the chart, Mrs Gale.

Come right up to the present day.

Now, whom do you see there

in direct succession
from that union?

Well, on the one line,
James Stuart-Bollinger.

Yeah, my adopted son.
And failing him?

Yourself.

Oh, so I'm related
to your adopted son?

More than that,

it means that you're second in line
of succession

to the Scottish throne.

Me? Why, that's fantastic.

Nevertheless it's true.

My son has refused it.

I'm not going to press him.
- Refuse what?

The Crown.

In 24 hours' time,

you'll hold yourself ready
to take up the accession.

You'll be known to your subjects
as Queen Anne II.

MILITARY DRUM CADENCE

TRENCH ISSUES MARCHING COMMANDS

Escort, halt!

DRUM CADENCE CONTINUES

Escort and accused, halt!

Stand at ease!

Set up the court-martial.

I thought I was entitled
to an officer to defend me.

This is a drumhead court-martial.

But those are only held
on the battlefield.

Or on the eve of battle

where there's no time
to conduct a full inquiry.

Has the prisoner been
searched for weapons?

- Yes, sir, no weapons.
- Right.

Escort platoon, front!

Peck.

Escort, stand at ease.

Bring the prisoner forward.

TRENCH: Accused,
one pace forward, march.

Now, Trench, read out the charges.

One, that the prisoner,
Major John Steed,

on the afternoon of the 5th of March

did cause malicious damage
to be occasioned to one smoke bomb,

being the property of
our sovereign lady, the Queen.

Have you any answer
to the first charge, Steed?

It was an accident. I was giving
one of your chaps a hand.

And that he did bribe

a private soldier
to assist him in this act.

- Where is the man he bribed?
- He's in the guardhouse, sir.

He's admitted the evidence.
- Come now.

That's not good enough.

I should like him
called as a witness.

Certainly, you're entitled to that.

I'm afraid he's not
able to appear, sir.

He was injured while
resisting arrest,

but he signed a full
statement of confession.

Oh, no, no,
I can't accept that as evidence.

Then may I proceed
with the next charge?

Provided it's better substantiated

than the first one.
- Hear, hear.

That the said Major Steed
by thus setting up an alarm...

Now, hold on a minute.

It hasn't been proved
that I did set up an alarm.

- The charge stands without it, sir.
- Very well. Let's hear it.

He had obtained access
to a secret staff meeting

and examined documents
relating thereto.

- With what intent?
- In my view, sir...

No, no, let Steed answer that.

Would you repeat the question?

What was your intention
in examining those secret documents?

To see if they were secret.

For all I knew they might have
been doodles.

Having discovered
they were indeed secret

what did you propose
to do with them?

To destroy them, of course, sir.

I was just in the process
of chewing them up

when your young captain
here came bumbling in.

Bring forward exhibit A.

Oh, ho, so we have
a second spy amongst us, eh?

I demand the same penalty
as for Corporal Craig, sir.

STUART-BOLLINGER:
Before I pass sentence, Steed,

have you anything
to say for yourself?

No.

TRENCH: Escort, front!

Major Steed, as presiding officer
of this field court-martial,

I hereby sentence you
to be executed by firing squad

in accordance
with military tradition.

- Excuse me, sir.
- Hmm?

If you could delay the execution
a little,

I'd like time
to interrogate him first.

Very well, Captain,
I'll leave that to you.

Confine the prisoner.

It's a pity about that, sir,
as you'd done quite good.

So, never mind. It's dead quick.

Ah, Trench, well, I must say

I consider our plan of attack
for tomorrow morning

to be absolutely foolproof.
- I hope so, sir,

but I'm worried about Steed.
- What?

I couldn't break him down.
He was working for someone

and presumably
passing back information

as he got it.
- What do you mean?

Suppose he was working
for the War Office.

They could know what we've planned

and be sitting there waiting for us.

- What are you suggesting?
- My men are ready now, General.

We could have them on the road
in an hour's time.

The longer we wait,
the more risk of discovery.

Yes, you may be right.

Undue delay is bad
for the troops' morale.

All right, but give me two hours.

I have some preparations
of my own to make.

- Right, sir.
- Well, I'll not say good luck now

because I want you to give me a call

half an hour before
you give the order to attack.

I may have some
final instructions myself.

- But that won't leave me much...
- Now, now, relax, Trench. Relax.

And that's an order.

Chablanc '58, sir.

That's a lousy year.

Can't you do anything
better than that?

Well, we have a Cordon Verte
but it's a bit on the sharp side.

My last meal on Earth,
and all you can provide is a '58.

What sort of officer's mess is this?

I don't know.
It's very poor on champers.

It's dead poor. Oh, sorry.

When I was in the Pioneer Corps,

you know we had a beautiful cellar.
Beautiful.

I wish you'd stayed
in the Pioneer Corps.

Why? Miss all the perks I get here?

HE CHUCKLES

If you're gonna open that,
you better be quick.

I'm gonna be shot in half an hour.

Right, doesn't give you
much time, does it?

Oh, careful.
Jessop, can't we get divorced

just until I've finished my meal?

Oh, no, sir, it's more
than my job's worth.

Here, gulp that down.

All right?
HE GROANS

It'll ruin the pheasant.
Have some yourself.

No, thank you very much.

- Jessop.
- Sir?

Were you to reach
into my hip pocket,

we can find our wallet here.
HE CHUCKLES

It's not worth it, sir.

- Why not?
- There's nothing in it.

Don't forget, I searched you.

Jessop, let's look on that
as a down payment, OK?

Look, you helped me before.

Oh, I didn't help you, sir.
I just didn't see you.

It's different now, see?
I'm under orders.

You're not going to catch me
up against that wall

like good old Craig.
Oh, that was very unpleasant.

- Were you there?
- I was detailed.

Part of the firing squad?

Orders is orders.

Mind you, I aimed for his left arm.

I could accord you
the same privilege if you like, sir.

Well, that's very thoughtful
of you, Jessop.

Wouldn't do you any good, though.
The rest are red hot.

Would you like the cheese board
to follow, sir?

Thank you.

How about an IOU?
- Oh-ho, not a hope.

Five thousand quid?

Without wishing
to be disrespectful, sir,

your credit's a bit dicey
at the moment, isn't it?

Knife. Come on.

If you're thinking of us
going through that window, sir,

I'm 15 stone. It's electrified, OK?

It's all too ridiculous, Mrs Gale.
You're living in a dream world.

That regiment standing by
in St James's Park

isn't a dream world.

But that's for a ceremonial parade.

They won't be armed.
- Are you sure?

It's quite impossible
to issue an entire regiment

with arms and ammunition

without the War Office
knowing about it.

The three platoons
under Captain Trench

coming in from the suburbs
are armed.

The stuff must have been
pilfered over a long period.

That might be possible
for three platoons,

but how did you know
about this, Mrs Gale?

I've been getting quite friendly
with Captain Trench.

Then I'm sorry for you.

- Are you speaking from experience?
- I'm afraid I am.

I see now that I was
a complete fool.

Of course, he played on my
affections for all he was worth.

He's ruthless and ambitious
and completely untrustworthy.

Does your husband share this view?

I don't know what he thinks of him.

I can't make out
the relationship at all.

I'd hoped you would know
something about that.

I only know that if you
want to prevent your husband

ending up on a treason trial...

Treason trial?
TELEPHONE RINGS

Excuse me.

Hello? Yes, it is.

Oh, yes, she is. Just a moment.

It's your husband.
- Oh.

Hello?

Yes. Yes, I am.

Oh, well, hang on a moment.
I'll ask her.

He wanted to know if you'd like
to come to the mess tonight?

Yes, I'd love to.

She'd love to, dear.

You'll be late, will you?

Why? Where are you?

Oh! Well, is everything all right?

Oh, no, no, no, I just wondered.

Goodbye, dear.

He was phoning from the War Office.

BAGPIPES PLAYING

TRENCH: Squad, halt.

Carry on, Sergeant.
- Sir.

Squad, step right.

Forward, quick march.

BAGPIPES RESUME PLAYING

Left, left, left, right...

Oh, well, they're playing our tune.

SERGEANT ISSUING ORDERS

BAGPIPES STOP PLAYING

Prisoner and escort. Attention!

About wheel, quick march.

Escort will retire
to the firing squad.

Squad, load.

RIFLES COCKING

Aim.

Fire.

Squad, unload!

GUNS CLACKING
BULLETS FALLING

Slope arms!

Private Jessop.

March away, Sergeant.
- Sir.

Squad, right turn.

Quick march.

BAGPIPES PLAYING

I have an urgent appointment
with the general.

I'll leave you to dispose
of the body.

Very good, sir.

Are you sure this tie pin's
worth 750 guineas, sir?

Ask any Bond Street jeweller.

Cos the lads
will be pretty toffed off

if you pulled a fast one on them.

I suppose you realise
if I was really dead

you could've had that anyway.

What, loot your dead body?
Oh, no, no, no.

There's some honour left
in this regiment.

- I'm very glad to hear it, Jessop.
- Besides, if I got caught

I'd get two years
in the glass house.

BAGPIPES PLAYING

MUSIC STOPS

ALL APPLAUD

BAGPIPE MUSIC RESUMES

Good evening.

Aren't you joining in?

No, I'm not very good at it.

That might be a black mark
against you

in the general's eye.

Have you seen him by any chance?

No, I talked to him on the telephone
about an hour ago. Why?

It's just that I had
an appointment with him

and he's not normally late.

Maybe he's with Major Steed?

What makes you say that?

Well, Major Steed
was invited tonight

but he hasn't turned up, either.
- Really?

MUSIC STOPS
Ladies and gentlemen...

Ladies and gentlemen,

I apologise for interrupting
your enjoyment,

but I have a grave announcement
to make.

Ladies and gentlemen,
fellow officers,

many of you must have wondered

why I've been taking
such an active interest

in my old regiment
now that I'm officially retired.

I know my wife certainly did.

I think she put it down

to the senile sentimentality
of an old soldier.

GUESTS LAUGH
It's given me some distress

that I was unable to explain
my activity to her,

but now I'm in a position
to tell you all.

Ian, you're drunk.

On the contrary, my dear,

I've never been more sober
in my life.

Ladies and gentlemen,
over the past few months

I have been able to discover details
of a treasonable military plot

against Her Majesty's government.

Within the past half hour,

I have submitted these details

to the Chiefs of Staff
in the War Office.

Seize that man!

Put him under close arrest.
Keep him in the guardroom.

Piper, the eightsome reel, please.

Ladies and gentlemen,
on with the dance.

BAGPIPE MUSIC RESUMES

INAUDIBLE CONVERSATION

Excuse me, Sir,
the War Office are on the phone.

They want to speak to you urgently.
- Yes, thank you.

- What do you make of that?
- It doesn't add up, Steed.

If the general were out
to expose the plot,

why would he wait until the troops
are ready to march?

But he needed positive proof
against Trench.

That Jacobite kick of his
was genuine.

He even convinced himself

I was descended from
Bonnie Prince Charlie.

What?

He thinks I'm Queen Anne II.

If you'd been around

you'd have got an invitation
to my coronation.

If I'd known I needn't have gone
in front of a firing squad.

I'd have applied to you
for a royal pardon.

As it is I lost
my best diamond tie pin.

Why would he put you
in front of the firing squad?

If he was trying to keep up an act
in front of Trench,

that's going a bit far.

Just a little?

Down, Rover.

Trench's troops are
already on the march.

One of his clan columns
has just reached Hampton Central.

Fellow officers, gentlemen,
may I have your attention, please?

Within the past 15 minutes,

on a signal from Captain Trench,

insurrectionist troops
have begun to advance on London.

The War Office have requested me
to assume command of this regiment

and organise
the defence of the city.

Gentlemen, you will return
and report immediately

to your unit commanders.

Arms and ammunition
are being issued now.

A very neat tactical manoeuvre.

The whole regiment is under arms

with the full blessing
of the War Office.

Better go and express my loyalty
to the general.

Oh!

Excuse me, Your Majesty.

Eight, nine...

Excuse me, sir. Signal, sir.

C Platoon have reached
Piccadilly underpass.

Excellent.

Are we not going to join them, sir?

We need you at HQ, Captain Trench.

Thank you, Jessop.

Jessop.

Jessop...

Give me that gun.

GUNSHOT RINGS

Didn't have much choice, did I?

Have you not got Trench yet?

No, sir. I've tried all frequencies.

Well, keep on trying.

I hope there's not going
to be bloodshed, General.

No, no, no,
just a little sporadic firing

to make it look convincing

and then I shall order Trench
to surrender.

And between us we'll be in command
of all the key positions.

And when the government
realises what's happening...

It'll be too late. We'll have
the city under martial law.

Excuse me,
I've got Queen Anne on the line.

She wants to see you
in the mess hall immediately.

Oh, I can't possibly leave here now.

She said it's a royal summons, sir.

Oh, very well.

The general's on his way
over now, ma'am.

- They're on their way.
- Fine. You take that end.

Got it?
- Right.

Anywhere you like. Just take it.

- Thank you.
- OK.

JOHN: You may rise, General.

Afraid the operation's
been cancelled.

STUART-BOLLINGER:
It's too late, Steed.

Trench is ordered to carry on
if anything happens to me.

CATHERINE: Trench is dead.

I'm afraid he had
no intention of waiting

till anything happened to you.

He was gonna take over
as soon as the coup succeeded.

I don't believe that.

The coup will succeed,
it must succeed.

I've spent two years planning this.

That's what the War Office
wants to know, General.

JOHN: All right, General.

The CIG would like a word with you.

You could have been
on the throne of England.

The Stuarts might
have been back in power.

Those lineage charts
were fake, General.

I arranged it with the curator.

Thank goodness for that.

So...

Well...

It came with a lass,
it'll go with a lass.

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