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1
00:00:04,771 --> 00:00:07,006
Hey guys, can I share
something with you?
2
00:00:07,008 --> 00:00:08,340
Sure.
Yeah. Go ahead.
3
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:11,944
Well, you know how I don't ever
brag about my sexual exploits.
4
00:00:11,946 --> 00:00:13,679
That would be an
accurate statement, yes.
5
00:00:13,681 --> 00:00:17,116
Well, last night,
Bonnie and I got really kinky.
6
00:00:17,118 --> 00:00:18,283
She painted my toenails.
7
00:00:19,153 --> 00:00:21,120
Wha...?
You serious?
8
00:00:21,122 --> 00:00:23,022
Check it out.
9
00:00:24,791 --> 00:00:26,291
What the hell is that?!
10
00:00:26,293 --> 00:00:27,359
Nail polish.
11
00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:28,460
No. The foot.
12
00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:31,130
It's a child's foot, Joe.
13
00:00:31,132 --> 00:00:33,298
Wha... I-I don't... you-you were
crippled when you were an adult.
14
00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:34,366
How the hell did...?
Yeah.
15
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,135
A few months back,
I got really drunk
16
00:00:36,137 --> 00:00:38,303
and was playing around
with an elastic band.
17
00:00:38,305 --> 00:00:41,140
I wrapped it around my thigh
and forgot about it
18
00:00:41,142 --> 00:00:44,009
for a week or two and uh, yeah,
so, that's my left foot now.
19
00:00:45,146 --> 00:00:46,645
I mean,
it still works the same.
20
00:00:46,647 --> 00:00:47,813
Oh, yeah, sure.
21
00:00:47,815 --> 00:00:49,348
Still a foot, I guess.
22
00:00:49,350 --> 00:00:50,682
Whassup?
23
00:00:51,986 --> 00:00:53,352
Oh, hey, Cleveland.
Hi.
24
00:00:53,354 --> 00:00:54,887
Wait, don't you have
a show to do?
25
00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:56,822
Oh... That's right.
26
00:00:56,824 --> 00:00:58,991
All right.
I knew this was coming.
27
00:00:58,993 --> 00:01:00,659
Everybody give me
your best shot.
28
00:01:00,661 --> 00:01:02,194
Oh, my God.
Where do I even begin?
29
00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:03,996
You know,
it's not a good sign
30
00:01:03,998 --> 00:01:04,897
that this is
the first time
31
00:01:04,899 --> 00:01:05,998
a lot of people
are realizing
32
00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:06,999
you had a show.
33
00:01:07,001 --> 00:01:08,333
Your logo was stupid.
34
00:01:08,335 --> 00:01:09,835
It looked like
a big, purple penis
35
00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:10,869
and your ratings blew.
36
00:01:10,871 --> 00:01:13,705
We did about the same
as Bob's Burgers.
37
00:01:13,707 --> 00:01:14,840
That's your bar!?
38
00:01:14,842 --> 00:01:16,041
Oh, shame on you!
39
00:01:16,043 --> 00:01:18,077
This is good.
This is constructive.
40
00:01:18,079 --> 00:01:19,912
The talking bear
was so bad,
41
00:01:19,914 --> 00:01:22,381
Seth MacFarlane quit voicing him
after season two.
42
00:01:22,383 --> 00:01:24,683
It's hard to make
a talking bear funny.
43
00:01:24,685 --> 00:01:27,519
It worked out
okay in movie form.
44
00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:29,555
What was supposed to be
the show's audience?
45
00:01:29,557 --> 00:01:30,556
Who did you make it for?
46
00:01:30,558 --> 00:01:31,690
Like, some black guy
47
00:01:31,692 --> 00:01:33,225
who's never met
another black guy?
48
00:01:33,227 --> 00:01:35,027
Anything else?
Yeah.
49
00:01:35,029 --> 00:01:38,030
Here's four seasons worth of
DVDs of what we've been up to.
50
00:01:38,032 --> 00:01:39,765
You know, just so you're
back up the speed.
51
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:43,235
And I'll warn you ahead of time:
these have jokes in them.
52
00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:45,070
I...
53
00:01:45,072 --> 00:01:47,539
I don't have
a DVD player.
54
00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:51,543
It seems today
that all you see
55
00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:54,713
Is violence in movies
and sex on TV
56
00:01:54,715 --> 00:01:58,050
But where are those
good old-fashioned values
57
00:01:58,052 --> 00:02:00,953
On which we used to rely?
58
00:02:00,955 --> 00:02:05,057
Lucky there's a family guy
59
00:02:05,059 --> 00:02:08,060
Lucky there's a man
who positively can do
60
00:02:08,062 --> 00:02:09,895
All the things
that make us...
61
00:02:09,897 --> 00:02:12,965
Excuse me.
Excuse me. Sorry.
62
00:02:12,967 --> 00:02:15,067
Sorry, Mort.
I-I hate to do this.
63
00:02:15,069 --> 00:02:16,902
What... What's happening?
64
00:02:16,904 --> 00:02:18,103
They want me in the line.
65
00:02:18,105 --> 00:02:19,571
Well, where do I go?
66
00:02:19,573 --> 00:02:20,806
Home?
67
00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:22,908
Okay, but I still
get paid for today, right?
68
00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:24,576
I... I wouldn't know.
69
00:02:24,578 --> 00:02:26,311
You need to talk to Marla.
70
00:02:28,948 --> 00:02:30,482
Sorry.
71
00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:31,416
You okay?
72
00:02:31,418 --> 00:02:32,818
What do you care?
73
00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:37,089
All the things that make us
74
00:02:37,091 --> 00:02:38,924
Laugh and cry
75
00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:44,062
He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy!
76
00:02:50,937 --> 00:02:52,437
It'll be nice
having Cleveland
77
00:02:52,439 --> 00:02:53,639
back across
the street.
78
00:02:53,641 --> 00:02:54,940
Why?
79
00:02:54,942 --> 00:02:56,975
I think a lot of times
you only say things
80
00:02:56,977 --> 00:02:58,277
because they make
you sound good.
81
00:02:58,279 --> 00:02:59,945
You know, Cleveland,
it must be weird
82
00:02:59,947 --> 00:03:02,514
for you guys to move and
not 'cause of a hurricane.
83
00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,950
Oh, Lois, I'm so
glad to see
84
00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:07,119
Peter and Cleveland
back together again.
85
00:03:07,121 --> 00:03:08,353
Yeah, me too.
86
00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:09,955
Now Peter will have
something to do
87
00:03:09,957 --> 00:03:10,956
besides flushing
the toilet
88
00:03:10,958 --> 00:03:12,658
to Foghat's
"Slow Ride."
89
00:03:12,660 --> 00:03:14,860
Peter, what are you
doing in there?
90
00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:16,028
Nothin'.
91
00:03:16,030 --> 00:03:17,329
Slow ride
92
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,633
Take it easy
93
00:03:23,871 --> 00:03:25,370
Slow ride
94
00:03:27,141 --> 00:03:29,341
Peter, you're wasting
tons of water!
95
00:03:29,343 --> 00:03:30,509
It's not a waste!
96
00:03:30,511 --> 00:03:32,311
And we need a faster toilet.
97
00:03:32,313 --> 00:03:33,712
'Sup, man?
98
00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:34,880
Yeah, yeah, "sup."
99
00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:36,949
Keep walkin', you
Boondocks rip-off.
100
00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:40,219
Home, sweet...
101
00:03:40,221 --> 00:03:41,386
Huh?!
102
00:03:43,990 --> 00:03:46,325
This house is a
disastrous area!
103
00:03:46,327 --> 00:03:48,227
I can't move my
family in here.
104
00:03:48,229 --> 00:03:49,361
You're right.
105
00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:50,996
Well, we'll all have
to do our part.
106
00:03:50,998 --> 00:03:52,731
I'll take little
cocoa butter here.
107
00:03:54,001 --> 00:03:55,334
What the hell
happened?
108
00:03:55,336 --> 00:03:57,002
Well, a lot of people
rented your house.
109
00:03:57,004 --> 00:03:58,570
Uh, Ryan Reynolds,
110
00:03:58,572 --> 00:04:00,005
Chevy Chase
and Dan Aykroyd...
111
00:04:00,007 --> 00:04:01,673
For a while, it
was an orphanage
112
00:04:01,675 --> 00:04:04,042
where the children
sang desolate songs.
113
00:04:04,044 --> 00:04:08,714
We're too old
to ever be adopted
114
00:04:08,716 --> 00:04:14,419
No one wants
a nine-year-old.
115
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:17,089
Shut up,
you bastards!
116
00:04:20,193 --> 00:04:22,561
I really appreciate y'all
117
00:04:22,563 --> 00:04:24,196
helpin' me fix up my house.
118
00:04:24,198 --> 00:04:25,197
Yeah, no problem,
Cleveland.
119
00:04:25,199 --> 00:04:26,398
Hey, where do you
want me to put
120
00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:27,866
all these giraffe
figurines?
121
00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:28,867
Just spread 'em out.
122
00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:31,203
Don't make any one
room too giraffey.
123
00:04:31,205 --> 00:04:33,038
Cleveland, where should
I hang the mirror?
124
00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:34,106
Right about here?
125
00:04:34,108 --> 00:04:35,607
Maybe a
little higher.
126
00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:37,042
Oh, like, uh,
up here?
127
00:04:37,044 --> 00:04:38,710
I think
maybe higher.
128
00:04:38,712 --> 00:04:40,379
You don't want
it too high, now.
129
00:04:40,381 --> 00:04:42,447
Let's get you a
different job, Joe.
130
00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:43,749
Are you sure?
131
00:04:43,751 --> 00:04:45,917
'Cause I already hung
all these paintings.
132
00:04:45,919 --> 00:04:48,954
This place is shaping up
real nice.
133
00:04:51,924 --> 00:04:53,759
Hey, Cleveland,
what's that?
134
00:04:53,761 --> 00:04:55,560
Oh, this is
my bead door.
135
00:04:55,562 --> 00:04:56,628
It looks stupid.
136
00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:58,363
Why don't you walk
through it?
137
00:05:01,734 --> 00:05:02,934
How do you feel?
138
00:05:02,936 --> 00:05:04,236
Awesome!
139
00:05:04,238 --> 00:05:06,571
Like a suitcase
comin' out of the airport.
140
00:05:06,573 --> 00:05:08,073
Yeah, or
like a bug
141
00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:10,509
walkin' through
Stevie Wonder's hair.
142
00:05:14,747 --> 00:05:17,916
Turns out this old house is
lacking in storage space,
143
00:05:17,918 --> 00:05:19,918
so I gotta make some
tough decisions.
144
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:21,486
You gonna keep
these neckties?
145
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:22,921
Yeah, throw 'em
in my car.
146
00:05:22,923 --> 00:05:24,423
They're just to keep
my trunk closed
147
00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:26,124
what if I'm ever
haulin' garbage.
148
00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:27,326
I ain't no lawyer.
149
00:05:27,328 --> 00:05:29,261
I use whatever
for my purposes.
150
00:05:29,263 --> 00:05:30,796
Could be a box spring.
151
00:05:30,798 --> 00:05:32,097
Could be a
old radio.
152
00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:33,999
Could be a more
recent radio...
153
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:34,966
Wait, now
I'm confused.
154
00:05:34,968 --> 00:05:37,002
So... so some of this
stuff isn't trash?
155
00:05:37,004 --> 00:05:38,470
Like this
old computer monitor?
156
00:05:38,472 --> 00:05:39,938
Nah, that's a
sittin' chair,
157
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:40,939
what for children.
158
00:05:40,941 --> 00:05:42,507
How about this telephone cord?
159
00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:43,942
That's a pet leash.
160
00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:46,311
If the good Lord decideth
we should have one.
161
00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:47,979
I'm gonna go
ahead and ditch
162
00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:50,115
these promotional McDonald's
cups from the 80's.
163
00:05:50,117 --> 00:05:51,817
Nah, that's all
we drink from.
164
00:05:51,819 --> 00:05:53,285
That's the Riddler
right there.
165
00:05:53,287 --> 00:05:56,288
He would make inquiries
to set your mind a-jumble.
166
00:05:56,290 --> 00:05:58,690
How do you live in a
house with all this junk?
167
00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:00,659
I'd rather stay in a
house with small kids.
168
00:06:00,661 --> 00:06:03,028
So you can sleep
on the couch.
169
00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,996
Uh,
please take the potty seat off the toilet,
170
00:06:04,998 --> 00:06:06,164
don't try to
pee through it.
171
00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:08,033
There's juice boxes
in the fridge
172
00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:10,369
and if you get hungry,
there's plenty of Goldfish in the couch.
173
00:06:10,371 --> 00:06:13,372
Um, feel free to watch
TV with the sound off.
174
00:06:13,374 --> 00:06:14,973
And the kids
will be down here
175
00:06:14,975 --> 00:06:17,676
first thing in the morning
to antagonize the dogs.
176
00:06:17,678 --> 00:06:19,745
Oh, and everyone
here has pinkeye.
177
00:06:24,817 --> 00:06:27,719
"...And that was the moment
I stopped being Dwayne Johnson
178
00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:29,988
and started being The Rock."
179
00:06:29,990 --> 00:06:31,857
That's a good place
to leave off.
180
00:06:31,859 --> 00:06:33,225
Hey, I just realized.
181
00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:34,226
We're The Rock!
182
00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:35,327
What do you mean?
183
00:06:35,329 --> 00:06:36,695
Together, you and I
184
00:06:36,697 --> 00:06:38,997
make one biracial
wrestler.
185
00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:40,866
Do you have any
folding chairs?
186
00:06:40,868 --> 00:06:42,033
No.
187
00:06:42,035 --> 00:06:43,068
That's all right.
I'll use this.
188
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:44,202
Folding chair!
189
00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:45,203
Ow!
190
00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:46,338
What was that?!
191
00:06:47,508 --> 00:06:49,174
That was my
great-grandma's vase!
192
00:06:49,176 --> 00:06:50,876
On the drive up
from Virginia,
193
00:06:50,878 --> 00:06:52,811
she kept that vase
'tween her legs.
194
00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:55,080
W-What are you doing?!
195
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:57,349
Making sure you
learn your lesson.
196
00:06:57,351 --> 00:06:59,017
Ow! It hurts!
197
00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:00,218
It hurts!
198
00:07:00,220 --> 00:07:02,220
I can't believe Japanese men
199
00:07:02,222 --> 00:07:03,889
pay good money for this.
200
00:07:03,891 --> 00:07:06,892
At work, I am
important businessman.
201
00:07:06,894 --> 00:07:10,462
Here, I am bad boy!
202
00:07:16,035 --> 00:07:17,436
We now return to
203
00:07:17,438 --> 00:07:19,037
The Gay Bachelor.
204
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:20,906
Ew, they're
all gross!
205
00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:22,541
I'm keeping
the roses.
206
00:07:22,543 --> 00:07:25,043
Mom!
Mrs. Brown spanked me!
207
00:07:25,045 --> 00:07:26,211
What?!
208
00:07:26,213 --> 00:07:28,580
And you still haven't
pulled up your pants?
209
00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:29,748
Chris, what
happened?
210
00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:31,917
I was playing with Rallo
and I broke a vase
211
00:07:31,919 --> 00:07:34,052
and then she gave me
a spanking!
212
00:07:34,054 --> 00:07:36,721
Uh, I believe the term
is "whuppin'", Chris.
213
00:07:36,723 --> 00:07:38,390
God, look at the size
of that handprint.
214
00:07:38,392 --> 00:07:40,058
It's like Doctor J.
215
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:41,293
Peter, this
is serious!
216
00:07:41,295 --> 00:07:42,961
A woman hit
our child!
217
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,563
What is wrong
with her?
218
00:07:44,565 --> 00:07:46,932
Whoa, can I get
some white bread
219
00:07:46,934 --> 00:07:48,133
on that judgmental
sandwich?
220
00:07:48,135 --> 00:07:50,068
Brian, why are you
bringing race into this?
221
00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:51,603
Lois, I've
spent my life
222
00:07:51,605 --> 00:07:53,472
trying to keep
race out of things.
223
00:07:53,474 --> 00:07:55,140
That's why whenever
I walk into Lids,
224
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:56,575
every guy
fist-bumps me.
225
00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:58,243
Oh, you're
full of crap, Brian.
226
00:07:58,245 --> 00:08:00,078
I'm just saying,
Lois, some of us
227
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,580
go through life
without seeing color.
228
00:08:01,582 --> 00:08:03,615
That's because you're
color blind, Brian.
229
00:08:03,617 --> 00:08:04,616
You're right.
230
00:08:04,618 --> 00:08:05,917
I am color blind.
231
00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:07,085
Here...
232
00:08:07,087 --> 00:08:08,320
and here.
233
00:08:08,322 --> 00:08:10,422
Hey, remember when you
swallowed that rib-eye bone
234
00:08:10,424 --> 00:08:11,756
and you couldn't
poop it out?
235
00:08:11,758 --> 00:08:12,924
And then you
pushed real hard
236
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:14,960
and the poo came through
the rib eye hole?
237
00:08:14,962 --> 00:08:17,629
Peter,
we gotta go over there and talk to Donna.
238
00:08:17,631 --> 00:08:19,764
All right, but you need
to cool down first, Lois.
239
00:08:19,766 --> 00:08:21,099
Find a way
to channel your anger.
240
00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:23,468
What I do is throw
a shot put into a crowd
241
00:08:23,470 --> 00:08:25,070
and make it look
like an accident.
242
00:08:29,142 --> 00:08:31,510
I forgot to make it
look like an accident.
243
00:08:36,116 --> 00:08:37,816
That woman
is gonna be sorry
244
00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:39,351
she laid her hands
on our son.
245
00:08:39,353 --> 00:08:41,119
Hello.
246
00:08:41,121 --> 00:08:42,120
Hi, j-just
so you know,
247
00:08:42,122 --> 00:08:43,455
this is sort of
Lois's thing.
248
00:08:43,457 --> 00:08:44,990
I-I'm not really
upset about it.
249
00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:45,991
So... go
ahead, dear.
250
00:08:45,993 --> 00:08:47,158
Donna, what gives you
251
00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:48,660
the right to
spank my child?
252
00:08:48,662 --> 00:08:50,862
It always smells like
the same meal over here.
253
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:52,464
I hit him
for a reason.
254
00:08:52,466 --> 00:08:53,965
He broke my vase.
255
00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:56,001
And maybe I wouldn't have
to discipline your child
256
00:08:56,003 --> 00:08:57,702
if you did
it yourself!
257
00:08:57,704 --> 00:08:58,870
Oh, please!
258
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,472
The only thing kids
learn from spanking
259
00:09:00,474 --> 00:09:02,807
is adults don't have the
patience to teach them.
260
00:09:02,809 --> 00:09:03,975
Bull honkey.
261
00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:04,976
What?!
262
00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:05,976
I don't spank,
263
00:09:05,978 --> 00:09:07,812
and my children are
very well-behaved.
264
00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:08,880
Oh, yeah?
265
00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:11,082
Your baby's on
the roof right now.
266
00:09:13,152 --> 00:09:14,051
Stewie!
267
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:15,687
You get down from there
this instant!
268
00:09:15,689 --> 00:09:17,022
Munch me, bitch!
269
00:09:17,024 --> 00:09:19,157
Right now, Stewie,
or you're in time-out!
270
00:09:19,159 --> 00:09:20,825
How many gray pubes
you pluck today,
271
00:09:20,827 --> 00:09:21,826
you old bag?
272
00:09:21,828 --> 00:09:23,495
Your time-outs
are a joke.
273
00:09:23,497 --> 00:09:24,829
You're a
terrible parent.
274
00:09:24,831 --> 00:09:26,364
I'm a terrible
parent?!
275
00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:27,866
You're a child abuser!
276
00:09:27,868 --> 00:09:29,034
You know what?
277
00:09:29,036 --> 00:09:30,835
From now on, I don't
want our families
278
00:09:30,837 --> 00:09:32,504
having anything to do
with each other!
279
00:09:32,506 --> 00:09:34,706
Well, Cleveland, looks like
these two little alley cats
280
00:09:34,708 --> 00:09:36,508
have scrapped it out.
I'll see you tomorrow.
281
00:09:36,510 --> 00:09:37,842
That includes
you, Peter.
282
00:09:37,844 --> 00:09:40,011
I don't want you ever
talking to Cleveland again.
283
00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:41,546
And Cleveland,
I forbid you
284
00:09:41,548 --> 00:09:43,782
from ever talking
to Peter again!
285
00:09:51,023 --> 00:09:52,524
Hey, Lois, look!
286
00:09:52,526 --> 00:09:53,725
I'm smoking!
287
00:09:53,727 --> 00:09:55,193
You can't control dick!
288
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:57,462
I'm a roof baby now!
289
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:03,201
So we're
making plans
290
00:10:03,203 --> 00:10:05,070
for Susie's first
birthday party.
291
00:10:05,072 --> 00:10:06,037
Oh, that's good bar talk.
292
00:10:06,039 --> 00:10:07,205
Hey, y'all..
293
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:09,040
Oh, oh, uh, sorry,
Peter, I'll...
294
00:10:09,042 --> 00:10:10,041
I'll get
outta here.
295
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:11,042
No, no, no, no,
I'll go.
296
00:10:11,044 --> 00:10:12,043
I'll go.
It's okay.
297
00:10:12,045 --> 00:10:13,211
What's goin' on?
298
00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:15,046
You guys touch
pee-pees or something?
299
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:16,047
I wish.
300
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:18,116
No, our wives
got in a big fight
301
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:20,051
and banned us from
seeing each other.
302
00:10:20,053 --> 00:10:21,052
So what if they're in a fight?
303
00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:22,587
What does that have
to do with you?
304
00:10:22,589 --> 00:10:23,922
Well, I gotta
live with Donna.
305
00:10:23,924 --> 00:10:25,857
Uh-oh.
There she is.
306
00:10:27,059 --> 00:10:28,560
Oh, no!
Peter, quick!
307
00:10:28,562 --> 00:10:29,961
Change pigments!
308
00:10:34,066 --> 00:10:35,934
That was close.
309
00:10:35,936 --> 00:10:38,470
Peter, we can't risk
seeing each other.
310
00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:41,606
But, Cleveland, you and I are
pals, and I just got you back.
311
00:10:41,608 --> 00:10:43,441
Well, there might
be one solution.
312
00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:46,578
We just got to hang out where
there's no chance we'll be seen.
313
00:10:46,580 --> 00:10:48,079
You know,
keep it a secret.
314
00:10:48,081 --> 00:10:49,447
Then that's what we'll do.
315
00:10:49,449 --> 00:10:51,116
'Cause I can't
lose you again, Cleveland.
316
00:10:51,118 --> 00:10:54,252
I'm closer to you than
I am to my own right hand.
317
00:10:54,254 --> 00:10:56,955
Oh, my God,
you like scrambled eggs, too?
318
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:59,124
Here, go ahead, have some.
319
00:10:59,126 --> 00:11:01,092
Whoa, that's a big bite there.
320
00:11:01,094 --> 00:11:02,293
Slow down, buddy.
321
00:11:04,097 --> 00:11:06,264
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! He's choking!
322
00:11:06,266 --> 00:11:08,933
Thanks for coming.
323
00:11:08,935 --> 00:11:10,769
Thank you... Thank you...
324
00:11:10,771 --> 00:11:11,836
Thanks for coming.
325
00:11:14,774 --> 00:11:16,441
Why you thought
it was appropriate
326
00:11:16,443 --> 00:11:19,244
to show up here, Cheryl,
I have no idea.
327
00:11:22,782 --> 00:11:24,983
Are you sure this is
the best solution, Peter?
328
00:11:24,985 --> 00:11:27,118
I just figured a plane
is a safe place
329
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,821
where you and I can hang out
and not be seen by our wives.
330
00:11:29,823 --> 00:11:31,489
Oh, that makes sense.
So, what have you been up to?
331
00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:33,458
Yup, sorry, Cleveland, I'm gonna
have to cut you off there.
332
00:11:33,460 --> 00:11:35,026
Whenever I ride on a plane,
333
00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:37,028
I have to put on my
noise-cancelling head phones.
334
00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:39,964
Leaves me alone
with nothing but my thoughts.
335
00:11:39,966 --> 00:11:42,000
But I don't want
to kill all these people!
336
00:11:42,002 --> 00:11:44,469
I don't care about the
alignment of the dark forces!
337
00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:46,938
Leave me alone!
338
00:11:48,140 --> 00:11:50,141
I love my wife Donna.
339
00:11:50,143 --> 00:11:52,977
I wish she and Peter's wife
got along better.
340
00:11:52,979 --> 00:11:55,513
That's why
we're on this airplane.
341
00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:57,749
I'm Cleveland.
342
00:12:01,722 --> 00:12:03,421
Ah, dang it!
343
00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:09,227
Do you have any idea how
fast you were going, sir?
344
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:11,830
Peter?!
Hey, Cleveland, this is just so we can talk
345
00:12:11,832 --> 00:12:13,331
without getting spotted
by Lois and Donna.
346
00:12:13,333 --> 00:12:15,667
I need you to step
out of the car, sir.
347
00:12:15,669 --> 00:12:17,235
Peter, there's got
to be a better way...
348
00:12:17,237 --> 00:12:19,738
He's got a knife!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
349
00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:21,406
Sorry, Cleveland,
it's got to be authentic.
350
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:23,007
Ow! Ow! Stay down!
Stay down!
351
00:12:23,009 --> 00:12:24,676
Cleveland, try
to grab my gun.
352
00:12:24,678 --> 00:12:26,845
Oh, trying to grab
my gun, are you?
353
00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:28,913
Ow! Ow!
354
00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:32,083
Hey, rookie, save some for me.
355
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:35,386
Wow, the whole
gang's back together.
356
00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:36,421
Shut up!
357
00:12:36,423 --> 00:12:38,056
We don't need you
in this town!
358
00:12:38,058 --> 00:12:40,091
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
359
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:42,627
We don't need you in this town.
360
00:12:53,072 --> 00:12:54,873
Oh, oh, oh, hi, Lois.
361
00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:56,441
You were with Cleveland,
weren't you?
362
00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:57,442
No!
363
00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:58,877
Then what were you doing?
364
00:12:58,879 --> 00:13:00,111
I'm, uh...
365
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,746
I'm having an affair.
366
00:13:01,748 --> 00:13:03,047
That's ridiculous.
367
00:13:03,049 --> 00:13:04,082
It's not ridiculous.
368
00:13:04,084 --> 00:13:05,216
It's Cybill Shepherd.
369
00:13:05,218 --> 00:13:07,051
She's attainable
for a guy like me now.
370
00:13:07,053 --> 00:13:08,219
Peter, enough lies.
371
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:10,255
I know you were with Cleveland.
372
00:13:10,257 --> 00:13:13,725
Until further notice,
you can sleep downstairs.
373
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:16,728
Aw, man.
374
00:13:16,730 --> 00:13:18,630
I wonder how it's going
for Cleveland.
375
00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:20,064
Cleveland, Get in here!
376
00:13:20,066 --> 00:13:21,299
And pull your pants down!
377
00:13:23,403 --> 00:13:26,971
At least turn me over
to my back side!
378
00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:34,779
We now return to
379
00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:37,782
"Slightly Too Early Comedy Club
Audience Member."
380
00:13:37,784 --> 00:13:40,084
Not like when Clinton was
in the White House, huh?
381
00:13:40,086 --> 00:13:41,586
When Clinton was
in the White House,
382
00:13:41,588 --> 00:13:43,421
all you needed to vote was
a piece of duct tape and a...
383
00:13:44,758 --> 00:13:46,257
Yes, yes!
384
00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:48,993
But things are different
with the Republican majority.
385
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:51,095
They're totally in the pocket
of the oil companies.
386
00:13:51,097 --> 00:13:53,097
I mean, the President
of the United States
387
00:13:53,099 --> 00:13:54,265
might as well be...
388
00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:56,100
Amen! Why not?
389
00:13:56,102 --> 00:13:57,435
Why not, right?
390
00:13:57,437 --> 00:13:59,170
But I guess
it could be worse.
391
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,638
The other day,
my wife asked me
392
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:02,340
if her ass looked fat
in her jeans.
393
00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:03,775
And I'm like, "Honey..."
394
00:14:03,777 --> 00:14:06,010
Oh, no!
395
00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:08,613
Wow. Wow!
396
00:14:08,615 --> 00:14:10,949
Dad, what are you
doing down here?
397
00:14:10,951 --> 00:14:12,517
Eh, your mom's making me
sleep on the couch
398
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:14,118
'cause she caught me
hanging out with Cleveland.
399
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:15,286
How about you?
400
00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:17,288
Mom's making me sleep
in the basement.
401
00:14:17,290 --> 00:14:19,958
Sleeping lower in the house is
a big punishment for her.
402
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,492
Well, this isn't working.
403
00:14:21,494 --> 00:14:22,961
I can't keep sneaking around
404
00:14:22,963 --> 00:14:24,128
trying to hang out
with Cleveland.
405
00:14:24,130 --> 00:14:26,030
Maybe you could figure
out a way to get
406
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:27,866
Mom and Mrs. Brown
to be friends.
407
00:14:27,868 --> 00:14:29,834
Yeah, you know,
I bet I can.
408
00:14:29,836 --> 00:14:32,203
I mean, I'm the guy who figured
out how much eye contact
409
00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:34,739
a band should make
during a guitar solo.
410
00:14:38,210 --> 00:14:40,478
Yeah, we're in sync,
and showing others
411
00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:42,547
how much we love the song.
412
00:14:43,983 --> 00:14:47,218
Okay, okay, time
to turn away now, Vince.
413
00:14:49,054 --> 00:14:50,722
Come on, we got
a lot of song left!
414
00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:52,790
Turn away!
Look at something else!
415
00:14:54,393 --> 00:14:57,762
I'm glad you didn't listen.
416
00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:03,668
Chris is right.
417
00:15:03,670 --> 00:15:05,136
I got to do something.
418
00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:02,560
All right, Cleveland, nothing
bonds women together like
419
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:04,762
having to take care of invalid
husbands in the hospital.
420
00:16:04,764 --> 00:16:06,397
What?
Don't die!
421
00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:12,937
Oh, Cleveland,
422
00:16:12,939 --> 00:16:16,808
I'm gonna hate
those Griffins forever.
423
00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:19,477
Only my side had airbags.
424
00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:23,748
Peter, what are we doing here?
425
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:25,917
Well, women will
always band together
426
00:16:25,919 --> 00:16:28,252
to stop an offensive art
exhibit from coming to town.
427
00:16:28,254 --> 00:16:30,955
So I've arranged for all
my photos of baby wieners
428
00:16:30,957 --> 00:16:32,924
to be put on display.
429
00:16:32,926 --> 00:16:35,827
Oh, Peter, I'm gonna have
to call the police on this.
430
00:16:35,829 --> 00:16:37,261
What? Why?
431
00:16:37,263 --> 00:16:38,963
It's to get our wives
back together!
432
00:16:38,965 --> 00:16:40,932
Peter, these are
hundreds of naked babies
433
00:16:40,934 --> 00:16:43,101
in suggestive situations!
434
00:16:43,103 --> 00:16:45,937
And they're time-stamped
as far back as 1998,
435
00:16:45,939 --> 00:16:48,940
which is way before
we had this idea!
436
00:16:48,942 --> 00:16:51,409
I need help!
437
00:16:53,645 --> 00:16:55,947
All right, Cleveland, one thing
that always bonds women
438
00:16:55,949 --> 00:16:57,515
is healing an abused animal.
439
00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,450
So I got us
an injured bald eagle.
440
00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:01,452
Somebody put cigarettes out
all over him.
441
00:17:01,454 --> 00:17:03,121
Peter, that's a symbol
of our country.
442
00:17:03,123 --> 00:17:05,289
This particular eagle
is a dick.
443
00:17:05,291 --> 00:17:07,025
Everything out of its mouth
is a taunt.
444
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:08,493
Peter, you're
being ridiculous.
445
00:17:08,495 --> 00:17:09,994
And you need to release
that eagle out into the...
446
00:17:11,498 --> 00:17:12,663
What'd that eagle say?
447
00:17:14,134 --> 00:17:16,200
Lock the door.
448
00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:23,708
Peter, let's just
give Susie her gift,
449
00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:25,009
eat our cake and leave.
450
00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:28,012
I don't want to be here
with that Brown family.
451
00:17:28,014 --> 00:17:30,381
That sounds even more racist
than it is.
452
00:17:31,817 --> 00:17:33,885
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you...
453
00:17:33,887 --> 00:17:36,154
The Great Quagini!
454
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:38,389
Hey-ey, everybody!
There's the birthday girl!
455
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,525
Oh, oh, what's that
behind your ear?
456
00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:42,326
Oh, it's a condom!
457
00:17:42,328 --> 00:17:45,496
Quagmire, please stop touching
my baby with a condom.
458
00:17:45,498 --> 00:17:46,864
And for my next trick,
I'm gonna split
459
00:17:46,866 --> 00:17:48,533
my beautiful assistant in half.
460
00:17:48,535 --> 00:17:50,568
And not the way you think.
461
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:53,037
Won't be needing this.
462
00:17:53,039 --> 00:17:55,006
Okay, time
for the three-legged race.
463
00:17:55,008 --> 00:17:56,841
Pair up, everyone.
464
00:17:56,843 --> 00:17:58,176
All right, Peter,
let's do it.
465
00:17:58,178 --> 00:18:00,244
You're my three-legged
race partner.
466
00:18:31,877 --> 00:18:33,578
No, Lois, I'm not
gonna be your partner.
467
00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:34,879
What?!
468
00:18:34,881 --> 00:18:36,114
I'm gonna be partners
with Cleveland.
469
00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:37,548
Peter, I told you...
470
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,717
And I'm telling you,
Cleveland and I have won
471
00:18:39,719 --> 00:18:42,053
every three-legged race
in Quahog except that time
472
00:18:42,055 --> 00:18:43,554
those two one-legged guys formed
473
00:18:43,556 --> 00:18:45,623
the perfect running person.
474
00:18:46,725 --> 00:18:48,059
Cleveland, what do you
think you're doing?!
475
00:18:48,061 --> 00:18:49,093
Peter's right.
476
00:18:49,095 --> 00:18:50,962
We're friends and that's that.
477
00:18:50,964 --> 00:18:53,064
This whole fight is ridiculous.
478
00:18:53,066 --> 00:18:57,068
Now, let's go win a
race with no prize.
479
00:19:01,907 --> 00:19:03,074
On your mark...
480
00:19:03,076 --> 00:19:04,575
get set... go!
481
00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:10,948
Did you see that?
My dog had a gun.
482
00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:12,316
How are we doing?!
483
00:19:12,318 --> 00:19:13,651
Are we beating anyone?
484
00:19:13,653 --> 00:19:16,654
I waited too long
to pick a partner.
485
00:19:21,094 --> 00:19:22,960
Oh, my God!
Peter, are you okay?
486
00:19:22,962 --> 00:19:24,595
I'm down!
I'm down, Cleveland!
487
00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:26,931
Go on without me!
Save yourself!
488
00:19:26,933 --> 00:19:29,000
No, I won't leave you.
489
00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:32,770
We started this race together,
we're gonna finish it together.
490
00:19:32,772 --> 00:19:34,972
I'm gonna carry you, Peter!
491
00:19:38,945 --> 00:19:40,278
Oh, my God, Peter.
492
00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:41,679
I-I can't pick you up.
493
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:42,780
How much do you weigh?
494
00:19:42,782 --> 00:19:43,948
I don't know.
495
00:19:43,950 --> 00:19:45,983
My car can't go
up hills, though.
496
00:19:45,985 --> 00:19:48,519
Well, then there's
only one solution.
497
00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:50,221
Hug and roll!
498
00:19:55,694 --> 00:19:58,129
Boy, those fools
sure do love each other.
499
00:19:58,131 --> 00:19:59,964
Yeah, I...
I guess they do.
500
00:19:59,966 --> 00:20:01,499
You know, Donna, they've
known each other
501
00:20:01,501 --> 00:20:03,000
a lot longer than we have.
502
00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:04,135
That's true.
503
00:20:04,137 --> 00:20:05,636
And if we're gonna be neighbors,
504
00:20:05,638 --> 00:20:08,973
we're gonna have to learn to
set aside our differences.
505
00:20:08,975 --> 00:20:10,041
Friends?
506
00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:12,310
Friends.
507
00:20:12,312 --> 00:20:14,178
Mrs. Brown?
508
00:20:14,180 --> 00:20:16,981
I want you
to spank me again.
509
00:20:16,983 --> 00:20:19,016
We're gonna win!
We're gonna win!
510
00:20:19,018 --> 00:20:20,351
Not so fast.
511
00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,796
Damn it!
512
00:20:35,701 --> 00:20:37,201
You know, Cleveland,
I got to say,
513
00:20:37,203 --> 00:20:39,870
it's great having the old gang
back together again.
514
00:20:39,872 --> 00:20:41,505
Well, it's great
being back.
515
00:20:41,507 --> 00:20:44,508
To Cleveland!
516
00:20:44,510 --> 00:20:47,245
To me!
517
00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:48,412
You know,
not a single person
518
00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:51,716
stopped watching
'cause you left.
519
00:20:51,718 --> 00:20:54,785
He doesn't have the guts
to say anything back.36404
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