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1
00:00:01,120 --> 00:00:03,419
Previously on "Station 19"...
2
00:00:03,420 --> 00:00:05,619
I'm humiliated.
You've humiliated me.
3
00:00:05,620 --> 00:00:07,879
I'm so sorry.
It's not good enough.
4
00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:09,209
How long has that been going on?
5
00:00:09,210 --> 00:00:10,669
See, I don't open up
to many people.
6
00:00:10,670 --> 00:00:11,749
With you...
7
00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:14,459
- it's easy.
- Somebody call 911!
8
00:00:14,460 --> 00:00:16,879
If you're looking for family
to update, I'm his sister.
9
00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:19,619
Updates are technically
just for family members.
10
00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:22,289
I was really ready to spend
the rest of my life with you.
11
00:00:22,290 --> 00:00:25,250
I get to spend
the rest of mine with you.
12
00:00:30,040 --> 00:00:34,289
Have you ever experienced
pain or worry or loss?
13
00:00:34,290 --> 00:00:36,379
Are we sure
Vic's gonna want breakfast?
14
00:00:36,380 --> 00:00:38,289
Well, she's come out
of that room exactly once
15
00:00:38,290 --> 00:00:39,210
since she's been crashing here.
16
00:00:39,210 --> 00:00:40,210
She needs to eat.
17
00:00:40,211 --> 00:00:41,829
What do we say
when we go in there?
18
00:00:41,830 --> 00:00:43,539
Let's just follow her lead.
19
00:00:43,540 --> 00:00:46,170
And, at the very least,
shove some toast in her mouth.
20
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:54,074
21
00:00:55,620 --> 00:00:56,829
Hey, Vic?
22
00:00:56,830 --> 00:00:58,119
We just wanted to check in.
23
00:00:58,120 --> 00:00:59,169
We... We have food.
24
00:00:59,170 --> 00:01:01,000
Vic, we're coming in, okay?
25
00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:05,120
Vic?
26
00:01:05,121 --> 00:01:07,749
Uh, she's gone.
27
00:01:07,750 --> 00:01:09,499
Should we be worried?
28
00:01:09,500 --> 00:01:11,169
I-I'm sure she wanted space.
29
00:01:11,170 --> 00:01:13,289
Here. Um, maybe I should call her.
You want me to call?
30
00:01:13,290 --> 00:01:14,669
Uh... Or we can do it together.
31
00:01:14,670 --> 00:01:16,119
Uh, no, y-yeah, whatever you want.
Great.
32
00:01:16,120 --> 00:01:17,539
You're right. She probably
just needed some air.
33
00:01:17,540 --> 00:01:19,249
How about I just text her?
34
00:01:19,250 --> 00:01:20,829
She may not want to talk.
35
00:01:20,830 --> 00:01:24,459
At some point...
36
00:01:24,460 --> 00:01:26,879
not now, obviously,
but sometime,
37
00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:29,880
do you think...
you and I should talk?
38
00:01:31,710 --> 00:01:35,379
Let's just focus
on Vic right now, okay?
39
00:01:35,380 --> 00:01:38,249
Have you ever
experienced trauma?
40
00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:42,460
Have you ever experienced doubt?
41
00:01:46,080 --> 00:01:47,709
Of course you have.
42
00:01:47,710 --> 00:01:48,959
Everyone has.
43
00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:50,080
Couldn't sleep?
44
00:02:05,580 --> 00:02:09,209
He walked in that building
and came out a dead man.
45
00:02:09,210 --> 00:02:11,539
That could've been
any one of us.
46
00:02:11,540 --> 00:02:14,210
On any day, any call.
47
00:02:15,420 --> 00:02:16,709
I know.
48
00:02:18,580 --> 00:02:20,579
I know.
49
00:02:20,580 --> 00:02:23,039
We all live through
things that test us.
50
00:02:27,250 --> 00:02:30,459
It's how we each cope...
51
00:02:33,210 --> 00:02:36,249
How we process,
that says the most.
52
00:02:41,500 --> 00:02:44,999
Do we face our pain and own it?
53
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:47,379
Or are we more comfortable...
54
00:02:47,380 --> 00:02:48,669
Good morning.
55
00:02:48,670 --> 00:02:50,329
Um, your usual.
56
00:02:50,330 --> 00:02:51,579
Yeah, I'll just have
the one today.
57
00:02:51,580 --> 00:02:53,829
Oh. Okay, my mistake.
58
00:02:53,830 --> 00:02:55,000
What's your hubby up to?
59
00:02:56,170 --> 00:02:58,209
He's at work. Hm.
60
00:02:58,210 --> 00:03:00,579
Living in denial?
61
00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:09,080
It's almost time for shift.
62
00:03:10,250 --> 00:03:12,749
I-I lost track of time.
63
00:03:12,750 --> 00:03:15,039
Haven't heard from you since
the hospital. I'm sorry.
64
00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:16,499
I've been helping Jennifer
with the arrangements.
65
00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:17,919
Mm.
66
00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:21,169
The department sent over
a checklist a mile long.
67
00:03:21,170 --> 00:03:23,999
And she, uh...
68
00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:25,829
She asked me to give the eulogy.
69
00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:27,209
Mm.
70
00:03:27,210 --> 00:03:28,999
Any advice?
71
00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:32,289
Mm. Wrong person to ask.
72
00:03:32,290 --> 00:03:34,499
Speeches are not my thing.
73
00:03:34,500 --> 00:03:35,749
Funerals aren't either.
74
00:03:38,290 --> 00:03:40,539
Everything okay?
75
00:03:40,540 --> 00:03:42,329
The wildfire that hit I.A.
earlier this week
76
00:03:42,330 --> 00:03:43,499
has progressed.
77
00:03:43,500 --> 00:03:45,169
Crews are requesting
backup supplies.
78
00:03:45,170 --> 00:03:46,919
Seattle stations
are organizing a caravan.
79
00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:49,459
Well, I'll handle it...
And whatever else.
80
00:03:49,460 --> 00:03:52,079
I mean, you... you have
a lot going on right now.
81
00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:53,959
And the work will be good
for me... for everyone.
82
00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:55,879
Take our mind off things.
83
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:57,619
I appreciate it.
84
00:03:57,620 --> 00:04:00,119
Hey, uh, you mind taking a crack
at this eulogy for me, too?
85
00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:03,210
Like I said,
wrong person to ask.
86
00:04:11,670 --> 00:04:12,749
Are you crying?
87
00:04:12,750 --> 00:04:13,959
No.
88
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:16,379
Then what's in your eyes?
89
00:04:16,380 --> 00:04:19,209
I said I wasn't crying,
and I meant it.
90
00:04:19,210 --> 00:04:21,419
You don't need to feel
embarrassed about this.
91
00:04:21,420 --> 00:04:23,749
We're all a little
messed up over Ripley.
92
00:04:23,750 --> 00:04:25,830
My head's kind of
all over the place, too.
93
00:04:27,670 --> 00:04:29,289
You want me to grab you a tissue?
Nope.
94
00:04:29,290 --> 00:04:30,879
You gonna grab one yourself?
95
00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:33,079
Negative, 'cause I don't need one.
I think you do.
96
00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:34,709
No, I don't,
because I'm not crying.
97
00:04:34,710 --> 00:04:36,419
Do we need to talk about this?
Absolutely not.
98
00:04:36,420 --> 00:04:37,959
But you always want to talk.
99
00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:39,079
Yeah. Alright, Mom.
100
00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:40,499
Love you. Bye.
101
00:04:40,500 --> 00:04:42,300
You talking with your mom?
With "I-love-yous"?
102
00:04:43,210 --> 00:04:44,829
Chief Ripley kind of reminded me
103
00:04:44,830 --> 00:04:46,499
to appreciate
the people I've got
104
00:04:46,500 --> 00:04:48,039
while I've still got them.
105
00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:50,579
Also, now that things
with Nikki are progressing,
106
00:04:50,580 --> 00:04:51,789
my mom has been saying
"I love you"
107
00:04:51,790 --> 00:04:53,289
at the end of every call.
108
00:04:53,290 --> 00:04:55,079
Kind of feels rude
not to say it back.
109
00:04:57,710 --> 00:04:59,669
Bishop, you okay?
Don't forget this.
110
00:04:59,670 --> 00:05:02,169
Okay.
111
00:05:07,500 --> 00:05:08,879
Look at that.
Not even 10% contained.
112
00:05:08,880 --> 00:05:10,499
I hope the winds don't shift.
113
00:05:10,500 --> 00:05:11,789
Just got word...
114
00:05:11,790 --> 00:05:13,749
California's requesting supplies.
115
00:05:13,750 --> 00:05:16,329
This one's gonna get worse
before it gets better.
116
00:05:16,330 --> 00:05:17,829
We'll organize shipments
for Seattle departments
117
00:05:17,830 --> 00:05:19,289
to take down to I.A.
118
00:05:19,290 --> 00:05:21,249
It's like bad
on top of bad, you know?
119
00:05:21,250 --> 00:05:22,789
First, Ripley dies,
and now this.
120
00:05:22,790 --> 00:05:24,669
Seems like we all could
have used a little pause.
121
00:05:24,670 --> 00:05:26,289
Hey, how's Vic?
122
00:05:26,290 --> 00:05:28,919
Uh, she split without
saying goodbye this morning.
123
00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,289
How are you doing?
124
00:05:30,290 --> 00:05:32,169
Just my allergies are acting up.
125
00:05:32,170 --> 00:05:33,669
Has anybody
heard from Vic today?
126
00:05:33,670 --> 00:05:34,879
Morning!
127
00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:36,459
You guys seeing these wildfires?
128
00:05:36,460 --> 00:05:38,789
This thing just won't stop.
129
00:05:41,830 --> 00:05:43,789
Yeah. Okay.
130
00:05:43,790 --> 00:05:45,419
Okay, go on.
131
00:05:45,420 --> 00:05:46,619
Get all your staring
out of your system,
132
00:05:46,620 --> 00:05:48,879
and then let's move on. Okay?
133
00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:50,709
Grieving Little Arm Candy's
in the house.
134
00:05:50,710 --> 00:05:52,419
Drinking coffee.
Ready to move forward.
135
00:05:52,420 --> 00:05:53,460
We all good now?
136
00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:57,379
Great. Okay.
137
00:05:57,380 --> 00:05:59,249
Back to your regularly scheduled
programs, please.
138
00:05:59,250 --> 00:06:02,119
Hey. You sure
you want to be here?
139
00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:04,619
I didn't come to work today 'cause
I didn't want to be here, so...
140
00:06:04,620 --> 00:06:05,829
How about I take you back home?
141
00:06:05,830 --> 00:06:07,289
To Maya and Andy's,
142
00:06:07,290 --> 00:06:08,959
or if you want a change
of scenery, come stay with me.
143
00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:10,459
Why? 'Cause I shouldn't
go home home?
144
00:06:10,460 --> 00:06:11,789
Back to the place
I spent so much time with him?
145
00:06:11,790 --> 00:06:12,879
Back to the bed we shared?
146
00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:14,240
You don't want me
sleeping in that?
147
00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:21,119
Sorry.
148
00:06:21,120 --> 00:06:23,169
Sorry. That was...
That was not fair.
149
00:06:23,170 --> 00:06:24,499
I'd love to come
crash after shift,
150
00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:26,119
but right now,
I'm working, so...
151
00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,079
Vic. We'll all cover for you.
152
00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:29,999
If you have other stuff
you need to be focused on...
153
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,709
You know, it's not a big deal.
154
00:06:31,710 --> 00:06:34,079
Jennifer's handling all the funeral
arrangements and everything, so...
155
00:06:34,080 --> 00:06:36,789
You don't want to be
involved in that, or...
156
00:06:36,790 --> 00:06:38,039
Not really.
157
00:06:38,040 --> 00:06:39,329
I mean, what does it matter?
158
00:06:39,330 --> 00:06:40,539
It's not gonna bring him back.
159
00:06:40,540 --> 00:06:41,999
And I'm not going
to the funeral anyway, so...
160
00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:43,249
Miller, you mind
passing me that syrup?
161
00:06:43,250 --> 00:06:44,540
Yeah. Thank you.
162
00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:50,079
Vic, you have...
You have to go to the funeral.
163
00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:52,039
No, I don't. Yes, you do.
164
00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:53,419
You can't just skip it.
165
00:06:53,420 --> 00:06:55,249
Yeah, I can. And I will.
166
00:06:55,250 --> 00:06:57,210
Uh, why hasn't Sullivan
called for lineup yet?
167
00:06:58,420 --> 00:07:00,579
I'm, um, covering for him today.
Sweet.
168
00:07:00,580 --> 00:07:02,619
Okay, so, we should just...
169
00:07:02,620 --> 00:07:04,169
start with chores, then, huh?
170
00:07:21,170 --> 00:07:23,829
Oh, my God.
Travis, I told you I was fine.
171
00:07:23,830 --> 00:07:25,119
I didn't pick that word
just for fun.
172
00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:26,579
I meant it. I'm fine.
173
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:27,959
Yeah, and I want you to know
174
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:30,080
that it's okay
if you're not... fine.
175
00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:34,379
You know, when Michael died,
I was a wreck.
176
00:07:34,380 --> 00:07:35,959
You know what helped me
get through it?
177
00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:37,619
His funeral,
178
00:07:37,620 --> 00:07:39,419
surrounded by other
firefighters,
179
00:07:39,420 --> 00:07:40,999
by my friends.
180
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:42,119
The tradition was actually
really comforting.
181
00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:43,619
And I'm so glad you had that.
182
00:07:43,620 --> 00:07:44,789
I know how meaningful
that was for you.
183
00:07:44,790 --> 00:07:46,249
You were his husband.
184
00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:47,619
But me, I don't factor
into this equation.
185
00:07:47,620 --> 00:07:49,459
Funerals aren't designed
for people like me.
186
00:07:49,460 --> 00:07:51,249
There's no special seat
for the secret...
187
00:07:51,250 --> 00:07:53,669
Vic, you know you were
so much more than that.
188
00:07:53,670 --> 00:07:55,329
It'll be an important day...
for Jennifer.
189
00:07:55,330 --> 00:07:56,879
She was his actual family,
not me.
190
00:07:56,880 --> 00:07:59,499
She can walk front and center
at that procession, not me.
191
00:07:59,500 --> 00:08:01,020
I don't need that.
I'm better off here.
192
00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:03,960
And I'm done talking now.
193
00:08:06,210 --> 00:08:08,289
Right in there, guys.
194
00:08:09,330 --> 00:08:10,379
Hey.
195
00:08:10,380 --> 00:08:11,829
P.D. heard about
the supply caravan
196
00:08:11,830 --> 00:08:13,379
and wanted to pitch in.
197
00:08:13,380 --> 00:08:15,039
I saw the funeral's on Friday.
198
00:08:15,040 --> 00:08:16,709
A bunch of us will be there
to pay our respects.
199
00:08:16,710 --> 00:08:18,919
Appreciate it.
200
00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:21,919
I'm actually, um,
heading to San Diego the next day. Really?
201
00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:23,879
There's this tactical
paramedic training program...
202
00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:25,209
Really intensive.
203
00:08:25,210 --> 00:08:26,080
Couple spots opened up
last minute,
204
00:08:26,081 --> 00:08:27,919
and, uh, they recruited me.
205
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:29,709
Wow. That's... Congratulations.
206
00:08:29,710 --> 00:08:30,710
Thanks.
207
00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:34,329
Does that mean
you're leaving Seattle?
208
00:08:34,330 --> 00:08:35,579
Well, for a couple
of months, yeah.
209
00:08:35,580 --> 00:08:36,669
Could turn into more.
210
00:08:36,670 --> 00:08:37,919
Jenna and I
got the call yesterday.
211
00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:39,879
It's really exclusive.
Kind of a big deal.
212
00:08:39,880 --> 00:08:41,749
You're going with Jenna?
213
00:08:41,750 --> 00:08:43,289
That's... That's...
That's great.
214
00:08:43,290 --> 00:08:44,499
I'm happy for you. Yeah.
215
00:08:44,500 --> 00:08:46,039
I'm happy for you, too.
216
00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:48,499
And you and Sullivan.
That's also great.
217
00:08:48,500 --> 00:08:50,539
Me and... What?
218
00:08:50,540 --> 00:08:51,959
Weren't you two holding hands
at the hospital?
219
00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:53,079
No. That's not...
220
00:08:53,080 --> 00:08:54,579
I mean, yes, we were, but...
221
00:08:54,580 --> 00:08:56,169
No. That's... No.
222
00:08:56,170 --> 00:08:58,079
No! Oh, okay.
223
00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:00,499
I guess maybe I misinterpreted.
My mistake.
224
00:09:00,500 --> 00:09:02,619
Station 19, respond.
225
00:09:02,620 --> 00:09:05,039
Aid Car 19, civilian in distress.
Uh...
226
00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:06,829
You ready, boss? 'Sup, Tanner?
227
00:09:06,830 --> 00:09:08,709
Who does that?
228
00:09:08,710 --> 00:09:10,539
Who just up and takes a job
in a new place
229
00:09:10,540 --> 00:09:12,879
without even telling
the people closest to them?
230
00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:14,829
I did, actually. Twice.
231
00:09:14,830 --> 00:09:17,030
Kind of going on three times,
now that I think about it.
232
00:09:17,830 --> 00:09:18,959
When does Tanner go?
233
00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,749
He said he leaves
right after the funeral.
234
00:09:24,750 --> 00:09:25,710
Hey, what's it like?
235
00:09:25,711 --> 00:09:27,329
What's what like?
236
00:09:27,330 --> 00:09:29,169
I've never been
to a firefighter funeral.
237
00:09:29,170 --> 00:09:31,289
I realize I don't know
where to sit,
238
00:09:31,290 --> 00:09:33,079
when to salute, what to expect.
239
00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:36,579
Expect... something beautiful.
240
00:09:36,580 --> 00:09:39,789
It's sad and hard,
but it's also really...
241
00:09:39,790 --> 00:09:41,499
Well, the Honor Guard will be there.
Right.
242
00:09:41,500 --> 00:09:43,329
They, uh... They're the ones
with the axes.
243
00:09:43,330 --> 00:09:45,249
And Miller keeps talking
about bells.
244
00:09:45,250 --> 00:09:46,829
Near the end of the funeral,
245
00:09:46,830 --> 00:09:49,329
someone will ring twenty
bells... five at a time...
246
00:09:49,330 --> 00:09:52,289
To signify a firefighter's
end of watch.
247
00:09:52,290 --> 00:09:53,749
They ring them in every station,
248
00:09:53,750 --> 00:09:56,539
and it's to announce that...
249
00:09:56,540 --> 00:09:59,829
one of us has come home
for the last time.
250
00:09:59,830 --> 00:10:01,119
That is beautiful.
251
00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:02,960
And sad.
252
00:10:04,210 --> 00:10:06,709
My dad rang the bells.
253
00:10:06,710 --> 00:10:09,039
The night
of my mom's funeral, too.
254
00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:10,789
We came home,
255
00:10:10,790 --> 00:10:13,959
he went up to their room,
closed the door, and...
256
00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:17,329
I heard him ringing a bell.
257
00:10:17,330 --> 00:10:19,459
And I just sat out in the hall
258
00:10:19,460 --> 00:10:24,039
and listened as he rang it
over and over.
259
00:10:33,210 --> 00:10:34,419
Uh, looks like we're here.
260
00:10:43,710 --> 00:10:45,960
Seattle Fire Department!
261
00:10:47,710 --> 00:10:49,169
Dispatch said he
called it in himself.
262
00:10:49,170 --> 00:10:51,120
Maybe he lost consciousness.
263
00:10:55,290 --> 00:10:57,789
Hello? Is anyone in here?
264
00:10:57,790 --> 00:10:58,919
Seattle Fire Department!
265
00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:00,619
Yes, help! In here!
266
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:05,789
Alright. Just give it to me
straight, please.
267
00:11:05,790 --> 00:11:07,619
Is it as bad as it looks?
268
00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:11,619
How bad is it, really?
269
00:11:11,620 --> 00:11:12,749
Nate, I can definitely say
270
00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,169
I've seen worse things
than this.
271
00:11:14,170 --> 00:11:15,499
I should've been more careful.
272
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:16,959
It's just that
I-I like to do things myself,
273
00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:18,289
and I should've called someone.
274
00:11:18,290 --> 00:11:19,499
Ow!
275
00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:21,539
Arm of the chandelier
is penetrating pretty deep.
276
00:11:21,540 --> 00:11:23,209
Looks like it's
plugging the axillary.
277
00:11:23,210 --> 00:11:25,119
I slipped, and, just like that,
it was falling on top of me.
278
00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:27,169
We are gonna
get you out now, Nate.
279
00:11:27,170 --> 00:11:28,619
My life flashed before my eyes.
280
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:30,709
You never see it coming, do you?
281
00:11:30,710 --> 00:11:32,499
I mean, one minute,
you're just doing what you do,
282
00:11:32,500 --> 00:11:35,040
and the next...
it could just be over.
283
00:11:36,580 --> 00:11:38,209
Well, it's not over
for you today, Nate.
284
00:11:38,210 --> 00:11:39,499
Okay? We got you.
285
00:11:39,500 --> 00:11:40,789
This is gonna be
pretty loud, Nate,
286
00:11:40,790 --> 00:11:41,959
so... just hold still.
287
00:11:49,170 --> 00:11:50,209
Ugh.
288
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:51,790
Hold on. Hold on.
289
00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:55,830
Yeah, got it.
290
00:11:59,290 --> 00:12:00,709
Wait, you're not gonna
take the whole thing out?
291
00:12:00,710 --> 00:12:01,879
Well, it's plugging a vessel,
292
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:03,920
so right now,
we want it to stay put.
293
00:12:05,250 --> 00:12:06,250
Go.
294
00:12:09,420 --> 00:12:10,539
Ready?
295
00:12:10,540 --> 00:12:12,169
So, what's gonna happen
at the hospital?
296
00:12:12,170 --> 00:12:13,289
They're gonna take the whole
thing out there, right?
297
00:12:13,290 --> 00:12:14,879
One, two, three.
298
00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:16,499
Nate, can you hear me?
299
00:12:16,500 --> 00:12:19,039
BP's dropping!
He's tachycardic, too.
300
00:12:19,040 --> 00:12:20,289
Didn't even get him
to the gurney.
301
00:12:20,290 --> 00:12:22,539
Start another IV.
Prepping norepinephrine.
302
00:12:22,540 --> 00:12:24,080
Still dropping. Pushing now.
303
00:12:28,540 --> 00:12:30,879
Come on, Nate.
304
00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:32,789
Numbers are coming back up.
Okay.
305
00:12:32,790 --> 00:12:34,249
Ready?
306
00:12:34,250 --> 00:12:35,619
One, two, three.
307
00:12:39,830 --> 00:12:41,669
Am I at the hospital?
308
00:12:41,670 --> 00:12:43,329
Not yet, buddy.
309
00:12:43,330 --> 00:12:45,289
But, uh, we need to get
you there right now.
310
00:12:45,290 --> 00:12:46,709
Why do I feel so weird?
311
00:12:46,710 --> 00:12:47,789
You know, that's normal, Nate.
312
00:12:47,790 --> 00:12:49,169
Your brain was briefly
deprived of oxygen.
313
00:12:49,170 --> 00:12:50,499
But for real, it feels like
314
00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:52,499
there's a brick
on my chest or something.
315
00:12:52,500 --> 00:12:54,169
He's losing consciousness again.
Damn it!
316
00:12:58,080 --> 00:12:59,579
Can I ask you
a personal question?
317
00:12:59,580 --> 00:13:01,079
Uh, it depends on how personal.
318
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:02,459
I'm pretty much an open book,
319
00:13:02,460 --> 00:13:04,249
but there are some things
I like to keep private.
320
00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:06,579
Like my birthmarks,
for instance... Did you write a eulogy?
321
00:13:06,580 --> 00:13:08,000
For your husband?
322
00:13:09,250 --> 00:13:10,379
Look, I'm just asking
323
00:13:10,380 --> 00:13:11,879
because I'm trying
to write one for Ripley.
324
00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:13,209
Sorry. I can't help you.
325
00:13:13,210 --> 00:13:15,749
Of course. No problem.
326
00:13:15,750 --> 00:13:18,709
No, I mean I can't help you
'cause I couldn't help myself.
327
00:13:18,710 --> 00:13:22,209
I couldn't bring myself to say
a word at Michael's service.
328
00:13:22,210 --> 00:13:24,789
You know who did
end up speaking, though?
329
00:13:24,790 --> 00:13:26,249
Ripley.
330
00:13:26,250 --> 00:13:30,209
Yeah, he said some really
wonderful things, actually.
331
00:13:30,210 --> 00:13:32,419
Like what?
I don't even really remember.
332
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:34,329
I just remember
that it meant a lot,
333
00:13:34,330 --> 00:13:36,079
you know, for the Chief
to take the time
334
00:13:36,080 --> 00:13:38,539
to get up there and say words
about my Michael like that.
335
00:13:38,540 --> 00:13:42,919
See, I need to figure out
words that'll do that.
336
00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:44,119
Especially for Hughes.
337
00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:46,289
Oh, I thought you'd heard.
338
00:13:46,290 --> 00:13:48,999
Vic isn't planning on going.
339
00:13:54,920 --> 00:13:57,419
Fact. I'm older than you.
340
00:13:57,420 --> 00:13:59,329
Are we playing a game?
341
00:13:59,330 --> 00:14:02,579
Fact. Because I am
older than you,
342
00:14:02,580 --> 00:14:04,539
I, by default, have had
more life experience than you.
343
00:14:04,540 --> 00:14:06,499
Okay.
More experience to learn from.
344
00:14:06,500 --> 00:14:09,119
Experience that lets me
know things
345
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,169
that you've yet to learn
for yourself.
346
00:14:11,170 --> 00:14:12,249
I feel like you're going
somewhere with this,
347
00:14:12,250 --> 00:14:13,419
somewhere I'm probably
not gonna like.
348
00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:14,879
You need bagpipes. Pardon?
349
00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:16,379
To drown out your thoughts.
350
00:14:16,380 --> 00:14:18,379
They play at most
firefighter funerals.
351
00:14:18,380 --> 00:14:20,669
They're loud and a little
startling at first,
352
00:14:20,670 --> 00:14:22,039
but then you start
to feel their hum.
353
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:23,749
You feel it right
inside your chest...
354
00:14:23,750 --> 00:14:25,169
Yeah, I-I, um...
I don't need bagpipes.
355
00:14:25,170 --> 00:14:26,999
Oh, you will change your mind
once you experience...
356
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,320
No, I d... I don't need bagpipes.
357
00:14:29,380 --> 00:14:30,749
No offense, sir,
358
00:14:30,750 --> 00:14:32,329
but I also don't need
your advice.
359
00:14:32,330 --> 00:14:34,880
Not on this. Excuse me.
360
00:14:39,420 --> 00:14:41,789
Our med kit's
almost out of norepi now.
361
00:14:41,790 --> 00:14:43,539
Don't say that
like he'll need more of it.
362
00:14:43,540 --> 00:14:44,999
Are you trying to jinx us?
363
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,289
Just want to make a note.
364
00:14:47,380 --> 00:14:50,580
Aah, no, no.
This can't happen again.
365
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,289
BP is 90 over 50 and dropping.
He's bottoming out.
366
00:14:54,290 --> 00:14:55,619
I'm worried about his airway.
367
00:14:55,620 --> 00:14:57,080
We need to intubate.
368
00:14:58,500 --> 00:15:01,709
At this rate, we'll get him to
the hospital in about a month.
369
00:15:01,710 --> 00:15:04,289
I would rather not try this
at sixty miles an hour.
370
00:15:04,290 --> 00:15:05,419
This has got to be
the last thing
371
00:15:05,420 --> 00:15:06,619
that goes wrong
with this guy, right?
372
00:15:06,620 --> 00:15:08,919
And the tube is... in.
373
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,959
Bag him.
374
00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:12,419
Okay. Let's load him up.
375
00:15:14,790 --> 00:15:16,580
Quick, quick, quick.
376
00:15:18,290 --> 00:15:20,119
I promised you
it wasn't over today, Nate.
377
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,829
But you got to meet us halfway.
378
00:15:21,830 --> 00:15:23,749
We should be good.
Just keep bagging.
379
00:15:25,120 --> 00:15:26,789
Try not to hit any potholes.
380
00:15:31,250 --> 00:15:33,459
Pressure's dropping.
Are fluids on full flow?
381
00:15:33,460 --> 00:15:35,459
Watch the road.
How much longer to the hospital?
382
00:15:35,460 --> 00:15:36,829
Seattle Pres
is about 6 minutes out.
383
00:15:36,830 --> 00:15:38,710
Just make sure to keep an eye
on his heart rate.
384
00:15:39,290 --> 00:15:41,459
I said avoid the potholes!
385
00:15:41,460 --> 00:15:43,459
We may need to use QuikClot.
I got it, Warren.
386
00:15:43,460 --> 00:15:44,749
It couldn't hurt
to hang another bag.
387
00:15:44,750 --> 00:15:46,430
Yeah, it wouldn't hurt you
to drive better.
388
00:15:47,750 --> 00:15:49,829
Are you kidding me, Nate?
389
00:15:49,830 --> 00:15:51,499
V-fib!
390
00:15:51,500 --> 00:15:52,900
Starting...
Start the defibrillator!
391
00:15:55,790 --> 00:15:57,669
Shock delivered.
392
00:15:57,670 --> 00:15:59,459
Still in V-fib. Damn it.
393
00:16:01,790 --> 00:16:03,289
Shock delivered.
394
00:16:04,670 --> 00:16:05,999
Pull over, Warren!
395
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,329
But we have to get him
to the hospital!
396
00:16:07,330 --> 00:16:09,169
I've just started
two-person CPR,
397
00:16:09,170 --> 00:16:10,709
and I only see
one of us back here.
398
00:16:10,710 --> 00:16:12,539
So either you put the Aid Car
on cruise control,
399
00:16:12,540 --> 00:16:13,919
or you pull over now!
400
00:16:22,750 --> 00:16:25,209
Come on, Nate. Come on.
401
00:16:25,210 --> 00:16:26,329
He's asystolic.
402
00:16:26,330 --> 00:16:27,499
Run saline wide open.
403
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:28,669
No, no, no, no, no. Andy, look.
404
00:16:28,670 --> 00:16:30,249
He's bleeding
from the impalement.
405
00:16:30,250 --> 00:16:32,169
Every compression is pushing more
and more blood out of his body.
406
00:16:32,170 --> 00:16:34,169
We can't just stop CPR.
I know. I know.
407
00:16:35,670 --> 00:16:37,289
Well...
408
00:16:37,290 --> 00:16:38,669
CPR isn't gonna bring him back
409
00:16:38,670 --> 00:16:40,579
if there's no blood
left to pump.
410
00:16:40,580 --> 00:16:42,039
We can't work
with this thing in.
411
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:44,499
So we should remove it?
He can bleed out.
412
00:16:44,500 --> 00:16:47,329
I'll pack it right away.
And then hold pressure.
413
00:16:47,330 --> 00:16:48,999
Look, it's safer
than what he's got now.
414
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:52,619
Whatever you do,
do not stop compressions.
415
00:17:02,620 --> 00:17:04,169
Warren. Yeah, I know.
416
00:17:04,170 --> 00:17:05,459
I know. This is a lot of blood.
417
00:17:05,460 --> 00:17:07,460
Just a few more seconds.
418
00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:10,080
Ben!
419
00:17:11,790 --> 00:17:12,919
Got it! He's packed!
420
00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:14,790
Holding pressure.
421
00:17:18,830 --> 00:17:20,709
Normal sinus rhythm.
422
00:17:20,710 --> 00:17:22,919
How far away are we from the hospital?
About 3 minutes.
423
00:17:22,920 --> 00:17:24,499
Can you hold pressure that long?
Hell yeah I can.
424
00:17:24,500 --> 00:17:26,260
Good, 'cause we're not
making any more stops.
425
00:17:27,330 --> 00:17:28,879
Just try not to hit
any potholes.
426
00:17:34,790 --> 00:17:36,999
Hughes?
Brought somebody to see you.
427
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:40,829
I thought we could all maybe,
uh, talk for a minute.
428
00:17:40,830 --> 00:17:42,749
I've got to get these organized
for Station 42,
429
00:17:42,750 --> 00:17:43,789
but be my guest.
430
00:17:43,790 --> 00:17:46,169
Okay, I may not be someone
431
00:17:46,170 --> 00:17:47,829
that you're anxious
to see right now,
432
00:17:47,830 --> 00:17:49,829
but when Robert called
and said that you weren't...
433
00:17:49,830 --> 00:17:51,829
Vic, you have to be there
at the funeral.
434
00:17:51,830 --> 00:17:54,329
You have to go.
I have to get these MREs sorted
435
00:17:54,330 --> 00:17:56,459
before the guys from 42
show to pick them up, so...
436
00:17:56,460 --> 00:17:59,459
Wildfire strike teams
are usually 22 firefighters.
437
00:17:59,460 --> 00:18:02,959
Three MREs a day,
that makes 66...
438
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:04,459
Hey.
439
00:18:04,460 --> 00:18:07,169
Why don't you,
um, stop for a second.
440
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,289
Okay?
441
00:18:08,290 --> 00:18:10,039
Look, you and Jen
442
00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:11,579
are the most important
people in Luke's life...
443
00:18:11,580 --> 00:18:12,580
You ever had one of these?
444
00:18:12,581 --> 00:18:14,329
It's basically
freeze dried food.
445
00:18:14,330 --> 00:18:15,459
It seems pretty gross,
446
00:18:15,460 --> 00:18:16,789
but once you heat it up,
it's not that bad.
447
00:18:16,790 --> 00:18:19,079
Okay, Vic.
He would've wanted you there.
448
00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:20,749
I want you to be there.
449
00:18:20,750 --> 00:18:22,329
I need you by my side.
450
00:18:22,330 --> 00:18:24,459
You're gonna have an entire
department of people there.
451
00:18:24,460 --> 00:18:26,829
You'll have Captain Sullivan.
You don't need me.
452
00:18:26,830 --> 00:18:28,619
He'd want you there...
Both of you.
453
00:18:28,620 --> 00:18:31,499
Well, I'm not going, so...
454
00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:33,329
Please? No, I can't. I can't.
455
00:18:33,330 --> 00:18:35,079
Okay? I can't. I'm sorry.
456
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:36,749
I can't go stand through
457
00:18:36,750 --> 00:18:38,669
a day of being tall
and polished and perfect
458
00:18:38,670 --> 00:18:41,040
a-and celebrating
his life when...
459
00:18:42,790 --> 00:18:44,749
You know, I need
to get back to work, so...
460
00:18:44,750 --> 00:18:46,379
Okay.
461
00:19:00,710 --> 00:19:02,879
Are you really still crying?
I can't control it.
462
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:05,329
Wouldn't hurt to try.
I am trying, but I can't shut it off.
463
00:19:05,330 --> 00:19:06,539
Debatable.
464
00:19:06,540 --> 00:19:07,669
And I hate that
I can't shut it off
465
00:19:07,670 --> 00:19:09,749
because I am not
a person who cries.
466
00:19:09,750 --> 00:19:12,749
I suck my feelings up, I stuff 'em
down, I embrace the pain,
467
00:19:12,750 --> 00:19:14,709
but today, I just...
I can't make it stop.
468
00:19:14,710 --> 00:19:16,959
So can you just stop
making me feel bad about it?
469
00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:18,879
I'm not trying to make you
feel bad... Well, you are.
470
00:19:18,880 --> 00:19:20,539
It's just a little distracting.
Oh, my God!
471
00:19:20,540 --> 00:19:22,209
Anemones.
472
00:19:22,210 --> 00:19:24,169
- What did he just say?
- What?
473
00:19:24,170 --> 00:19:25,709
You two are sea anemones.
474
00:19:25,710 --> 00:19:27,289
We're not enemies.
475
00:19:27,290 --> 00:19:29,419
I-I know.
476
00:19:29,420 --> 00:19:31,289
I said sea anemones.
477
00:19:31,290 --> 00:19:33,119
Shady, little
underwater invertebrates,
478
00:19:33,120 --> 00:19:35,460
and you got your tentacles
waving all over the place.
479
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:39,499
What is he talking about?
I have no idea.
480
00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:41,579
Squishy, freaky sea predators.
481
00:19:41,580 --> 00:19:43,829
When you strike,
nobody ever sees it coming.
482
00:19:43,830 --> 00:19:45,209
But when you're threatened,
483
00:19:45,210 --> 00:19:47,209
you close yourselves off
into these tiny, little balls
484
00:19:47,210 --> 00:19:48,539
so that nobody can touch you.
485
00:19:48,540 --> 00:19:51,619
And the only time you come out
is to strike each other.
486
00:19:51,620 --> 00:19:54,249
You two got together
in a fishbowl.
487
00:19:54,250 --> 00:19:55,709
And now you're wading
through the open sea.
488
00:19:55,710 --> 00:19:58,499
So no wonder you're
having trouble right now.
489
00:19:58,500 --> 00:19:59,789
No wonder
you can't figure it out.
490
00:19:59,790 --> 00:20:02,669
No wonder
you keep stinging each other.
491
00:20:02,670 --> 00:20:04,579
I hate to say this, but I think
he's starting to make sense.
492
00:20:04,580 --> 00:20:06,749
Maya, do you want to
know why you're crying?
493
00:20:06,750 --> 00:20:08,209
It's because you're sad.
494
00:20:08,210 --> 00:20:10,499
There doesn't have to be
any other reason.
495
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:12,579
You're sad today. We all are.
496
00:20:12,580 --> 00:20:15,169
And you just so happen to be
wearing it all over your face.
497
00:20:15,170 --> 00:20:17,749
And Jack, you're not really
annoyed with her for crying.
498
00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:20,209
You're in a garbage mood
because...
499
00:20:20,210 --> 00:20:23,829
the chief went down,
and it's hard.
500
00:20:23,830 --> 00:20:25,999
It's a tough one.
501
00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:29,039
We all thought he was
invincible, and he wasn't.
502
00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:30,919
And it's probably
stirring up some stuff.
503
00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:32,539
So just take that in.
504
00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:36,879
Let's sway in this current
and not fight it
505
00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:39,161
and appreciate the fact that
you two are still here today.
506
00:20:40,750 --> 00:20:42,959
And you have each other.
507
00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:48,539
I don't know where all that
sea creature stuff came from,
508
00:20:48,540 --> 00:20:53,079
but, uh...
surprisingly helpful, man.
509
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:54,080
Thank you.
510
00:20:54,081 --> 00:20:55,619
You're welcome.
511
00:20:55,620 --> 00:20:58,419
It all came from Nikki.
512
00:20:58,420 --> 00:21:01,169
She's really observant
and communicative,
513
00:21:01,170 --> 00:21:03,879
and somehow,
it is rubbing off on me.
514
00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:05,119
She sounds really amazing.
515
00:21:05,120 --> 00:21:06,579
She is.
516
00:21:06,580 --> 00:21:07,669
Blow your nose.
517
00:21:07,670 --> 00:21:10,079
You finally went
on that first date, huh?
518
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:11,829
Uh, we had plans,
but I kinda canceled
519
00:21:11,830 --> 00:21:13,619
because grief isn't sexy.
520
00:21:15,250 --> 00:21:17,249
Wait, then why are we taking
relationship advice from him?
521
00:21:17,250 --> 00:21:19,209
Because I am right.
522
00:21:19,210 --> 00:21:20,669
Here.
523
00:21:20,670 --> 00:21:22,249
Blow your nose.
524
00:21:22,250 --> 00:21:23,289
Again.
525
00:21:27,830 --> 00:21:30,539
34-year-old male found impaled
in the chest by a chandelier.
526
00:21:30,540 --> 00:21:31,959
He arrested twice en route...
527
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:33,919
V-fib the first time
and asystolic the second.
528
00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:35,329
We initiated CPR
529
00:21:35,330 --> 00:21:37,119
and intubated
with a total of four shocks,
530
00:21:37,120 --> 00:21:38,169
epi, and a norepi drip.
531
00:21:38,170 --> 00:21:39,829
Oh, and we
removed his impalement.
532
00:21:39,830 --> 00:21:40,999
That it?
533
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:42,119
We'll take it from here.
534
00:21:42,120 --> 00:21:43,919
Thank you.
535
00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:45,829
Whew.
536
00:21:45,830 --> 00:21:47,209
You know, I don't think
I have taken a breath
537
00:21:47,210 --> 00:21:49,079
since we kicked down
Nate's door.
538
00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:50,919
What?
539
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:52,999
Nothing. Just...
you have no idea.
540
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:55,289
I... Today was already
one thing after another,
541
00:21:55,290 --> 00:21:58,379
and I thought the call would
take my mind off all the things,
542
00:21:58,380 --> 00:22:00,169
but apparently,
I'm living in a world of whack-a-mole.
543
00:22:00,170 --> 00:22:01,669
Is everything alright?
544
00:22:01,670 --> 00:22:03,749
Ryan's leaving, and I shouldn't
care, but I kinda do.
545
00:22:03,750 --> 00:22:06,329
But I don't, because what's more
important is I'm helping Vic.
546
00:22:06,330 --> 00:22:08,749
Except I'm not because she's
sneaking out of my apartment,
547
00:22:08,750 --> 00:22:10,749
leaving me with Maya, who
I can't even talk to right now.
548
00:22:10,750 --> 00:22:12,709
And... And then I get stuck
with the guy who keeps dying.
549
00:22:12,710 --> 00:22:15,419
Yeah. And someone I really
looked up to did die, and...
550
00:22:15,420 --> 00:22:17,419
You know, through all of it,
551
00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:21,169
all I can hear is
the sound of those damn bells
552
00:22:21,170 --> 00:22:23,209
coming from my dad's room.
553
00:22:23,210 --> 00:22:26,669
I'm 9 years old all over again,
554
00:22:26,670 --> 00:22:30,249
and a-all this stuff is coming
up that I don't know how to...
555
00:22:30,250 --> 00:22:31,289
I don't know how to
clamp it down,
556
00:22:31,290 --> 00:22:32,789
I don't know how to
make it go away.
557
00:22:32,790 --> 00:22:35,459
One bleeder at a time.
558
00:22:35,460 --> 00:22:36,499
What?
559
00:22:36,500 --> 00:22:39,539
One bleeder at a time.
560
00:22:39,540 --> 00:22:40,999
I-It's something I learned
when I was a surgeon.
561
00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:42,169
When you open a patient up
562
00:22:42,170 --> 00:22:43,419
and everywhere you look,
563
00:22:43,420 --> 00:22:44,919
there's something
bleeding or falling apar...
564
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,539
When it's damage control,
565
00:22:47,540 --> 00:22:52,250
all you can do is tackle
one bleeder at a time.
566
00:23:07,210 --> 00:23:09,329
Some call, huh? Ooh.
567
00:23:09,330 --> 00:23:11,669
I don't think you'd believe me
if I told you.
568
00:23:11,670 --> 00:23:13,419
How's the eulogy going?
569
00:23:13,420 --> 00:23:15,669
It's not.
570
00:23:15,670 --> 00:23:17,379
I think I'm just
too close to it.
571
00:23:17,380 --> 00:23:18,669
Nothing sounds right.
572
00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:23,619
Did you speak
at your wife's funeral?
573
00:23:23,620 --> 00:23:25,169
Yes, I did.
574
00:23:25,170 --> 00:23:27,999
Or I t... I tried.
575
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:30,709
Started off okay,
but then I just lost it.
576
00:23:30,710 --> 00:23:32,329
Mm. Barely even remember now.
577
00:23:32,330 --> 00:23:34,709
Um, I think I was...
578
00:23:34,710 --> 00:23:37,879
I was really raw, you know?
579
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:40,669
Did you speak at your mom's?
580
00:23:40,670 --> 00:23:43,289
I was 9, so I didn't speak.
581
00:23:43,290 --> 00:23:45,249
I don't think I spoke
the whole day. Mm.
582
00:23:45,250 --> 00:23:47,419
Barely.
583
00:23:47,420 --> 00:23:50,789
I was raw, too.
584
00:23:50,790 --> 00:23:52,329
Still am.
585
00:23:52,330 --> 00:23:53,579
Yeah.
586
00:23:53,580 --> 00:23:55,830
So, use it.
587
00:23:57,710 --> 00:24:01,709
Be raw if you need to be raw.
588
00:24:01,710 --> 00:24:04,039
Y-You don't have to write a word
589
00:24:04,040 --> 00:24:06,379
or read a word you write.
590
00:24:06,380 --> 00:24:11,459
Just... get up there and talk.
591
00:24:11,460 --> 00:24:13,040
Talk to him.
592
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:16,669
It doesn't matter,
593
00:24:16,670 --> 00:24:18,579
not when it comes
from the heart.
594
00:24:24,460 --> 00:24:26,209
I just hope
Vic will be there to hear it.
595
00:24:44,380 --> 00:24:45,419
Any update on Vic?
596
00:24:47,330 --> 00:24:48,419
Afraid not.
597
00:24:48,420 --> 00:24:49,999
She's really not coming?
598
00:25:06,620 --> 00:25:08,379
There's still time...
599
00:25:08,380 --> 00:25:09,829
if you want change your mind,
get dressed.
600
00:25:09,830 --> 00:25:11,920
Nope, I'm good.
601
00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:17,120
I don't think that's true.
602
00:25:19,620 --> 00:25:21,500
How many different ways
do I have to say it?
603
00:25:23,380 --> 00:25:24,619
How many different times?
604
00:25:24,620 --> 00:25:26,789
I'm fine. I'm good.
605
00:25:26,790 --> 00:25:28,419
I'm coping. I don't want to go.
606
00:25:28,420 --> 00:25:32,619
Nobody wants to go to a funeral.
607
00:25:32,620 --> 00:25:34,119
But it is good to go.
608
00:25:34,120 --> 00:25:36,249
It gives you clarity.
It gives you closure.
609
00:25:36,250 --> 00:25:37,709
Yeah, I don't need any of those things.
I already got 'em.
610
00:25:37,710 --> 00:25:39,209
No, you don't.
611
00:25:39,210 --> 00:25:42,329
I just, um... I need you
to back off of me, please.
612
00:25:42,330 --> 00:25:43,579
You want me to back off? Yeah.
613
00:25:43,580 --> 00:25:45,579
You want me to give you some space?
614
00:25:45,580 --> 00:25:48,619
Okay, you've had
days of space, Vic,
615
00:25:48,620 --> 00:25:50,379
and you're still...
616
00:25:50,380 --> 00:25:52,209
You are in denial.
617
00:25:52,210 --> 00:25:54,289
You are not coping.
618
00:25:54,290 --> 00:25:55,919
Believe me,
I know how hard it is
619
00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:56,830
to accept what's happened. Mm.
620
00:25:56,831 --> 00:25:58,419
You know I do.
621
00:25:58,420 --> 00:25:59,999
But trust me, when you
lose a spouse like that...
622
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:01,680
No, but I didn't...
I didn't lose a spouse!
623
00:26:03,830 --> 00:26:06,749
We never got married, so I...
You know what? I...
624
00:26:06,750 --> 00:26:10,289
I didn't get to lose a spouse.
625
00:26:10,290 --> 00:26:11,829
I didn't get to
experience a marriage.
626
00:26:11,830 --> 00:26:13,079
I was robbed of that.
627
00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:14,540
Instead, I lost someone who...
628
00:26:18,460 --> 00:26:20,829
I lost someone who...
629
00:26:20,830 --> 00:26:25,669
very well may have been
the love of my life.
630
00:26:25,670 --> 00:26:27,580
But he wasn't my husband.
631
00:26:30,830 --> 00:26:33,119
I'm nothing to him.
632
00:26:33,120 --> 00:26:34,879
Officially, on paper,
I am nothing.
633
00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:38,829
So... yeah, maybe I don't...
634
00:26:38,830 --> 00:26:41,499
Maybe I don't want to accept
that particular truth right now.
635
00:26:41,500 --> 00:26:44,169
But you don't get to pretend
like you know what that's like.
636
00:26:44,170 --> 00:26:46,039
You don't.
637
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:47,079
You don't know
what this is like,
638
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:48,329
so stop parading around here
639
00:26:48,330 --> 00:26:50,539
talking about me
behind my back to...
640
00:26:50,540 --> 00:26:51,919
To anyone else in the station
641
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:54,579
because I'm not acting
like you want me to act.
642
00:26:54,580 --> 00:26:56,789
I am not you!
643
00:26:56,790 --> 00:26:58,829
Lucas is not Michael!
644
00:26:58,830 --> 00:27:01,249
Okay, your husband
died two years ago!
645
00:27:01,250 --> 00:27:02,829
If anybody is
in denial right now...
646
00:27:02,830 --> 00:27:03,919
Say it. Do it.
647
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:04,920
Just... Don't. It's okay.
648
00:27:04,921 --> 00:27:06,329
Say whatever you want to say.
649
00:27:06,330 --> 00:27:07,879
You want to scream at me,
wail on me? I don't care.
650
00:27:07,880 --> 00:27:10,419
Just get all that anger
out right now.
651
00:27:10,420 --> 00:27:12,169
Because if you don't,
it will keep bubbling up
652
00:27:12,170 --> 00:27:14,169
and it will come out worse
653
00:27:14,170 --> 00:27:16,419
in some other way, onto someone else.
Oh, my God.
654
00:27:16,420 --> 00:27:18,249
You can't see it right now, Vic...
Okay.
655
00:27:18,250 --> 00:27:19,829
But even getting mad...
Just shut u... Shut up!
656
00:27:19,830 --> 00:27:23,380
It's a healthy first step!
Just shut... shut up!
657
00:27:24,670 --> 00:27:26,959
Just stop talking to me.
658
00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:29,379
And go to the funeral.
659
00:27:29,380 --> 00:27:32,669
Just... Just go.
660
00:27:40,120 --> 00:27:42,499
Excuse me.
Are you Victoria Hughes?
661
00:27:42,500 --> 00:27:43,999
What?
662
00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:45,459
I'm sorry, can I...
Can I help you?
663
00:27:45,460 --> 00:27:49,169
It's... It's probably
weird that I, uh...
664
00:27:49,170 --> 00:27:51,289
Dr. Bailey told me
what you look like...
665
00:27:51,290 --> 00:27:53,829
And I'm so sorry for your loss.
666
00:27:53,830 --> 00:27:56,209
I'm s... Who... Who are you?
667
00:27:56,210 --> 00:27:58,379
I'm Levi. I'm a-a doctor
at Grey-Sloan.
668
00:27:58,380 --> 00:28:01,879
I was, uh, with Chief Ripley
when he collapsed.
669
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:03,619
We were both
at the flower shop that day...
670
00:28:03,620 --> 00:28:05,499
The day that he was
going to see you.
671
00:28:05,500 --> 00:28:08,079
And I wanted
to give these to you.
672
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:10,379
They're the same ones
that he picked out.
673
00:28:10,380 --> 00:28:14,170
N-Not the same same,
but, uh... anyway.
674
00:28:16,750 --> 00:28:19,249
He wanted them to say...
675
00:28:19,250 --> 00:28:22,209
he was ready to spend
the rest of his life with you.
676
00:28:22,210 --> 00:28:26,379
So, I guess I...
677
00:28:26,380 --> 00:28:29,040
I thought that
you might like to see them.
678
00:28:36,621 --> 00:28:37,709
Thank you.
679
00:28:37,710 --> 00:28:40,379
Uh, I-I, um...
680
00:28:40,380 --> 00:28:41,709
I really need
to get back to the hospital,
681
00:28:41,710 --> 00:28:43,459
but it was really nice
to meet you.
682
00:28:43,460 --> 00:28:46,170
And I-I'm really sorry.
683
00:29:15,330 --> 00:29:17,959
Hey, hey. Hey.
684
00:29:35,830 --> 00:29:37,619
My badge. Where's my badge?
685
00:29:37,620 --> 00:29:39,210
Hey, hey.
686
00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:42,669
One bleeder at a time.
687
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:56,669
I have to go
meet the procession.
688
00:30:56,670 --> 00:30:58,619
You gonna be okay?
689
00:30:58,620 --> 00:30:59,789
Go.
690
00:30:59,790 --> 00:31:01,579
He hated being late.
691
00:31:03,920 --> 00:31:05,579
I'm fine, Robert.
692
00:31:05,580 --> 00:31:06,959
Really.
693
00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:09,499
Alright. Okay.
694
00:31:17,170 --> 00:31:18,789
May I join you?
695
00:31:18,790 --> 00:31:20,879
God, Vic.
696
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:22,829
I am so glad you're here.
697
00:31:43,710 --> 00:31:45,249
Dean says I'm a sea anemone...
698
00:31:45,250 --> 00:31:46,250
What?
699
00:31:46,251 --> 00:31:47,539
Which I think just means
700
00:31:47,540 --> 00:31:49,579
I keep things in
to protect myself,
701
00:31:49,580 --> 00:31:53,379
even when I don't need to.
702
00:31:53,380 --> 00:31:55,080
I'm so sorry I didn't
tell you about Jack.
703
00:31:56,960 --> 00:31:58,079
You tell me everything.
704
00:31:58,080 --> 00:32:00,209
I should've trusted
you with my...
705
00:32:00,210 --> 00:32:02,039
poisonous anemone tentacles.
706
00:32:05,170 --> 00:32:06,999
I know funerals
are hard for you.
707
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:08,170
How you holding up?
708
00:32:09,620 --> 00:32:11,120
Better now.
709
00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:35,209
You made it.
710
00:32:35,210 --> 00:32:37,079
I did.
711
00:32:52,420 --> 00:32:54,079
Stay.
712
00:33:04,330 --> 00:33:08,829
And if, while on duty,
I must answer death's call,
713
00:33:08,830 --> 00:33:13,670
bless with your protecting hand
my family, one and all.
714
00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:30,170
I have been thinking a lot
about what to say today.
715
00:33:32,750 --> 00:33:36,709
Chief Ripley was a boss
to most of us in this room.
716
00:33:36,710 --> 00:33:39,379
We looked up to him.
We respected him.
717
00:33:39,380 --> 00:33:43,709
As Chief, he gave
everything to this department.
718
00:33:43,710 --> 00:33:49,000
As Lucas, he gave even more
to those he loved outside it.
719
00:34:06,210 --> 00:34:09,249
To me, Lucas was a true friend.
720
00:34:09,250 --> 00:34:10,709
We really saw each other.
721
00:34:10,710 --> 00:34:13,619
We understood each other.
722
00:34:13,620 --> 00:34:15,499
Strengths and flaws.
723
00:34:15,500 --> 00:34:16,879
We fought.
724
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:21,459
We made up...
Thankfully, not too late.
725
00:34:21,460 --> 00:34:23,749
Sometimes you connect
with a person,
726
00:34:23,750 --> 00:34:26,829
and you can't always explain it.
727
00:34:26,830 --> 00:34:31,419
Over distance and time
and impossible obstacles,
728
00:34:31,420 --> 00:34:34,919
you still find a way
to each other.
729
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:41,289
It's so rare to meet someone
who connects with you that way.
730
00:34:41,290 --> 00:34:43,619
Someone who makes you want to
face your fears
731
00:34:43,620 --> 00:34:48,419
head-on, eyes open.
732
00:34:48,420 --> 00:34:52,999
And it's so hard to say goodbye
to them when they go.
733
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,169
My last conversation with Luke,
734
00:34:55,170 --> 00:34:58,169
he told me not to say
goodbye to him.
735
00:34:58,170 --> 00:35:03,789
Instead, I said, "We're good."
736
00:35:03,790 --> 00:35:05,709
I want to reiterate that now.
737
00:35:10,920 --> 00:35:14,379
We miss you, Luke.
738
00:35:14,380 --> 00:35:17,619
We wish you didn't
leave us so soon.
739
00:35:17,620 --> 00:35:21,919
But since you did,
since you had to...
740
00:35:25,120 --> 00:35:26,670
It's all good.
741
00:35:28,670 --> 00:35:30,289
We're all good.
742
00:35:33,710 --> 00:35:35,499
You were so good.
743
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:05,579
When a firefighter dies,
744
00:36:05,580 --> 00:36:09,249
the toll of the bell
represents their last alarm.
745
00:36:09,250 --> 00:36:12,419
The end of their duties.
746
00:36:12,420 --> 00:36:16,669
The bell rings to say
their shift is over.
747
00:36:16,670 --> 00:36:18,750
They are going home.
748
00:36:54,540 --> 00:36:58,329
I first met Ripley on his, uh,
second call as a rookie.
749
00:36:58,330 --> 00:37:00,209
Told him to grab that
"left-handed halligan."
750
00:37:01,580 --> 00:37:03,329
Fire must've been out
for at least 30 minutes
751
00:37:03,330 --> 00:37:04,919
before he realized
that it didn't exist.
752
00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:06,709
Oh.
753
00:37:06,710 --> 00:37:08,539
To Chief Ripley.
754
00:37:08,540 --> 00:37:10,340
To Chief Ripley. To Ripley.
To Ripley. Ripley.
755
00:37:11,170 --> 00:37:12,459
Yes! JACK: No way.
756
00:37:12,460 --> 00:37:14,499
Come on. That's right.
That's right.
757
00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:16,289
College was not a waste.
758
00:37:16,290 --> 00:37:18,039
It's all in the elbow, Dean.
It's all in the elbow.
759
00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:19,169
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
760
00:37:19,170 --> 00:37:20,379
What am I seeing here?
761
00:37:20,380 --> 00:37:22,249
Am I seeing
what I think I'm seeing?
762
00:37:22,250 --> 00:37:24,499
You never go out in public
without that thing on.
763
00:37:24,500 --> 00:37:27,749
And you definitely do not go out
drinking without that thing on!
764
00:37:27,750 --> 00:37:30,579
I do now. I do tonight.
765
00:37:30,580 --> 00:37:31,999
You know, we don't know
what's gonna happen.
766
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,669
I'm alive. I'm here.
767
00:37:33,670 --> 00:37:35,419
World's full of possibilities.
768
00:37:35,420 --> 00:37:37,539
I think that calls
for another round.
769
00:37:37,540 --> 00:37:39,379
Uh, guys, how weird would it be
770
00:37:39,380 --> 00:37:41,209
if I accidentally scheduled
my first date with Nikki
771
00:37:41,210 --> 00:37:42,579
for, let's say, right now?
772
00:37:42,580 --> 00:37:44,289
That seems like a terrible idea.
773
00:37:44,290 --> 00:37:45,879
How do you accidentally
schedule a date?
774
00:37:45,880 --> 00:37:47,120
Hey!
775
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:49,499
Hey.
776
00:37:49,500 --> 00:37:51,419
Oh. Hi.
777
00:37:51,420 --> 00:37:53,499
Hello.
778
00:37:53,500 --> 00:37:54,749
Everyone, this is Nikki.
779
00:37:54,750 --> 00:37:55,750
Nice to meet you.
780
00:37:55,751 --> 00:37:57,669
Well, this isn't
intimidating at all.
781
00:37:57,670 --> 00:37:59,619
Oh, there's nothing
to be intimidated by.
782
00:37:59,620 --> 00:38:00,999
Except for my quarters game.
783
00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:02,749
Are you in?
784
00:38:02,750 --> 00:38:04,579
I spent three years at Harvard,
785
00:38:04,580 --> 00:38:07,329
in which I graduated
summa cum laude... Mm-hmm.
786
00:38:07,330 --> 00:38:09,120
Broke the women's
tennis record, and...
787
00:38:11,500 --> 00:38:13,079
became unbeatable at quarters.
788
00:38:14,420 --> 00:38:16,209
Let's get a drink.
789
00:38:16,210 --> 00:38:18,119
Maybe not at a wake.
790
00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:19,749
Let's. Lovely to meet you all.
791
00:38:19,750 --> 00:38:21,749
Nice to meet you.
792
00:38:21,750 --> 00:38:23,000
Yeah, I like her.
793
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:28,039
Your eulogy was really moving.
794
00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:31,459
Really? I felt, uh,
zoned out there.
795
00:38:31,460 --> 00:38:32,709
You spoke from your heart.
796
00:38:32,710 --> 00:38:35,879
It showed.
797
00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:37,249
You're alright.
798
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:42,379
Thanks.
799
00:38:43,750 --> 00:38:46,709
So, um, if Jack wants
to come over tonight...
800
00:38:46,710 --> 00:38:48,499
I'm okay with it,
801
00:38:48,500 --> 00:38:51,000
if he promises to pick up
breakfast in the morning.
802
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:54,579
Thanks. I mean it.
803
00:38:54,580 --> 00:38:55,789
Mm.
804
00:38:55,790 --> 00:38:57,169
But I think Vic should
be the only one staying over
805
00:38:57,170 --> 00:38:58,579
for a while.
806
00:38:58,580 --> 00:39:00,879
Yeah.
807
00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:02,039
I think that's good.
808
00:39:02,040 --> 00:39:03,789
Do you know where she is?
809
00:39:03,790 --> 00:39:05,119
I haven't seen her.
810
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:08,120
She... She said
she wanted to be alone.
811
00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:14,209
Oh, those are beautiful flowers.
812
00:39:14,210 --> 00:39:15,249
Thank you.
813
00:39:15,250 --> 00:39:17,539
Uh, just you again?
814
00:39:17,540 --> 00:39:18,540
Yeah.
815
00:39:20,960 --> 00:39:22,709
When a firefighter dies,
816
00:39:22,710 --> 00:39:25,579
the toll of the bell
represents their last alarm.
817
00:39:25,580 --> 00:39:26,789
So, did I tell you
818
00:39:26,790 --> 00:39:28,209
the crazy thing Ryan said
819
00:39:28,210 --> 00:39:31,329
about me and Sullivan,
of all people?
820
00:39:31,330 --> 00:39:34,669
He said he thought
we were together
821
00:39:34,670 --> 00:39:36,999
because of something he saw at
the hospital or something.
822
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:39,459
Yeah, I saw that, too.
823
00:39:39,460 --> 00:39:41,459
That wasn't anything.
824
00:39:41,460 --> 00:39:44,329
We're not... I mean,
I'm... I'm definitely not...
825
00:39:44,330 --> 00:39:45,789
No?
826
00:39:45,790 --> 00:39:48,039
No. Mm.
827
00:39:49,830 --> 00:39:52,169
You sure about that?
828
00:39:54,540 --> 00:39:55,749
Once the bell rings...
829
00:39:57,880 --> 00:39:59,459
It can't be un-rung.
830
00:39:59,460 --> 00:40:01,789
Just my usual, please. Got it.
831
00:40:01,790 --> 00:40:04,329
Um, just so you know,
I'm about to take off.
832
00:40:04,330 --> 00:40:06,209
Phil will be taking over for me.
833
00:40:06,210 --> 00:40:08,079
So if you need anything else
834
00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:10,329
or your husband's coming later,
835
00:40:10,330 --> 00:40:12,169
I could go ahead and
put an order in now for you.
836
00:40:12,170 --> 00:40:13,669
Just let me know.
Okay, thanks, Cam.
837
00:40:13,670 --> 00:40:14,670
You're welcome.
838
00:40:14,671 --> 00:40:16,459
There's no more denying it.
839
00:40:16,460 --> 00:40:18,919
The end is here.
840
00:40:18,920 --> 00:40:21,289
Okay.
841
00:40:21,290 --> 00:40:23,379
I'm calling it.
Let's get you home.
842
00:40:23,380 --> 00:40:24,789
But it's so early.
Hey. Two more of these.
843
00:40:24,790 --> 00:40:26,419
Hey, no, no, no, no, no, no.
None for me.
844
00:40:26,420 --> 00:40:27,919
I-I got to get home
to Miranda, you know?
845
00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:29,959
I can give you a ride
or call you one.
846
00:40:29,960 --> 00:40:31,499
I don't know.
847
00:40:31,500 --> 00:40:34,039
I've got, uh, some mistakes
to make tonight, Warren.
848
00:40:34,040 --> 00:40:35,539
Yeah. But, uh, I'll get a cab.
849
00:40:35,540 --> 00:40:36,579
Don't worry. Go home.
850
00:40:38,710 --> 00:40:40,119
Alright. Yeah, yeah.
851
00:40:41,750 --> 00:40:43,669
See you later.
852
00:40:43,670 --> 00:40:44,670
I'll take a beer.
853
00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:50,669
How's it going?
854
00:40:50,670 --> 00:40:52,079
I'm Jeremy.
855
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:53,669
I'm Travis.
856
00:40:53,670 --> 00:40:54,919
I know.
857
00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:56,079
You do?
858
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:57,329
Yeah, you're the one
who's friends
859
00:40:57,330 --> 00:40:59,619
with Ripley's
little side hustle...
860
00:40:59,620 --> 00:41:01,169
Hughes, right?
861
00:41:01,170 --> 00:41:04,619
She looked wrecked
at that ceremony.
862
00:41:04,620 --> 00:41:05,709
Come on, man.
863
00:41:05,710 --> 00:41:07,919
Give me the scoop.
864
00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:09,539
You need to stop talking
right now.
865
00:41:09,540 --> 00:41:11,660
Oh, don't tell me you're
getting a piece of that, too.
866
00:41:12,460 --> 00:41:13,789
Whoa, whoa!
867
00:41:13,790 --> 00:41:16,539
The bell rings to say
the shift is over.
868
00:41:18,380 --> 00:41:19,959
Hey, uh, Cam?
869
00:41:19,960 --> 00:41:21,789
Oh. Need something else?
870
00:41:25,620 --> 00:41:28,920
You know the, uh... the guy
I'm always in here with?
871
00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:33,579
He's not my husband.
872
00:41:33,580 --> 00:41:36,619
And I, uh...
873
00:41:36,620 --> 00:41:41,249
I lied to you before
when you asked where he was.
874
00:41:41,250 --> 00:41:42,879
He wasn't at work.
875
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:50,499
He wasn't a-at work...
876
00:41:52,170 --> 00:41:54,579
Because he died.
877
00:42:02,420 --> 00:42:04,459
That's, um...
878
00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:07,669
That... That sucks.
879
00:42:07,670 --> 00:42:09,879
The bell rings to say goodbye.
880
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:14,119
Yeah, it super does.
881
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:15,959
The bell rings to say...
882
00:42:17,540 --> 00:42:20,250
it's time to go home.
882
00:42:21,305 --> 00:42:27,710
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