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1
00:00:01,230 --> 00:00:04,940
[Quill]
Okay. The good news is, we saved
the shrunken Kree home world,
2
00:00:04,940 --> 00:00:07,640
which is expanding back
to its normal size.
3
00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:09,140
[alarm blaring]
4
00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:09,140
The bad news--
5
00:00:09,140 --> 00:00:11,850
[computer]
Self-destruct in two minutes.
6
00:00:11,850 --> 00:00:13,440
...is fairly self-explanatory.
7
00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:15,900
This is it, everyone.
8
00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:15,900
[clicks]
9
00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:19,140
Peter, wait.
Did you see that mirror
10
00:00:19,140 --> 00:00:21,060
in the weapons vault?
11
00:00:19,140 --> 00:00:21,060
You mind, Gamora?
12
00:00:21,060 --> 00:00:23,270
I'm trying to spend
my final moments
in this galaxy
13
00:00:23,270 --> 00:00:25,310
with some mid-'70s
one-hit wonders.
14
00:00:25,310 --> 00:00:27,940
They might not have to be
your final moments.
15
00:00:27,940 --> 00:00:29,640
That mirror
is called the Black Vortex.
16
00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:32,020
Thanos said it was
an indestructible prison.
17
00:00:32,020 --> 00:00:34,140
Drax approves
of indestructible.
18
00:00:34,140 --> 00:00:37,020
Yeah, well, Rocket
don't approve of no prison.
19
00:00:37,020 --> 00:00:38,310
I am Groot.
20
00:00:38,310 --> 00:00:39,940
Good point, bud.
21
00:00:39,940 --> 00:00:42,060
Ain't a prison in the galaxy
I can't escape.
22
00:00:42,060 --> 00:00:46,140
The thing is, this prison
isn't exactly in the galaxy.
23
00:00:52,140 --> 00:00:54,440
[alarm continues blaring]
24
00:00:52,140 --> 00:00:54,440
[Quill]
I don't know, Gamora.
25
00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:57,060
This thing looks,
like, super evil.
26
00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:08,770
Self-destruct in 15 seconds.
27
00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:08,770
Who am I to judge?
28
00:01:08,770 --> 00:01:11,100
Everyone hold hands
so we don't get separated.
29
00:01:13,730 --> 00:01:15,140
I am Groot!
30
00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:29,640
[yelling]
31
00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:35,190
[yelling]
32
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:05,730
[birds twittering]
33
00:02:12,060 --> 00:02:15,190
[twittering]
34
00:02:12,060 --> 00:02:15,190
[yawns]
35
00:02:15,190 --> 00:02:17,230
Wha-- Where am I?
36
00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:23,270
[bird twittering]
37
00:02:25,190 --> 00:02:27,190
[animals chittering softly]
38
00:02:27,190 --> 00:02:28,940
[twittering]
39
00:02:37,140 --> 00:02:39,100
Good morning, Princess Gamora.
40
00:02:39,100 --> 00:02:40,850
[screams]
41
00:02:40,850 --> 00:02:43,020
[animals clamoring]
42
00:02:43,020 --> 00:02:46,230
Aah!
43
00:02:43,020 --> 00:02:46,230
Oh, the horror!
44
00:02:46,230 --> 00:02:47,600
[sighs]
45
00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:00,900
[birds twittering]
46
00:03:10,350 --> 00:03:11,940
[yells]
47
00:03:11,940 --> 00:03:14,690
Don't be scared,
Princess Gamora.
48
00:03:14,690 --> 00:03:18,350
It's just us friendly
woodland critters.
49
00:03:18,350 --> 00:03:20,730
You can talk?
50
00:03:20,730 --> 00:03:23,730
[laughing]
Of course I can.
51
00:03:23,730 --> 00:03:25,980
Every-birdie here
can talk.
52
00:03:27,020 --> 00:03:29,140
[birds twittering]
53
00:03:30,060 --> 00:03:31,400
Huh?
54
00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:33,520
Ugh!
55
00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:37,600
Groot. Quill!
56
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:40,100
A quill,
like a feather?
57
00:03:40,100 --> 00:03:42,520
[gasps]
If you need a feather, Princess,
58
00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:44,600
you can have one of mine!
59
00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:47,730
But what's a "Gwoot"?
[giggles]
60
00:03:47,730 --> 00:03:49,900
Groot and Quill
are two of my friends.
61
00:03:49,900 --> 00:03:51,900
They were with me
just a minute ago.
62
00:03:51,900 --> 00:03:54,600
There's no-bunny here but us.
[giggling]
63
00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:58,810
[gasps]
My comm link! And my blade!
Where are they?
64
00:03:58,810 --> 00:04:02,690
Golly, I haven't seen
anything like that around here.
65
00:04:02,690 --> 00:04:05,060
Have you, Lopsy?
66
00:04:02,690 --> 00:04:05,060
Uh-uh.
67
00:04:05,060 --> 00:04:07,480
I need my gear
to find my friends,
so whatever game
68
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:10,060
you weird creatures
are playing,
I don't have time for it.
69
00:04:10,060 --> 00:04:11,350
Go on! Shoo!
70
00:04:11,350 --> 00:04:13,400
[animals clamoring]
71
00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:17,560
[whimpering]
72
00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:20,190
[sighs]
73
00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:20,190
We're sorry, Princess.
74
00:04:20,190 --> 00:04:22,810
Don't be upset.
75
00:04:22,810 --> 00:04:27,230
Yeah. Bad things happen
when you're not happy, Princess.
76
00:04:27,230 --> 00:04:30,810
You wouldn't like me
when I'm sad.
77
00:04:30,810 --> 00:04:32,810
I know what will perk you up.
78
00:04:32,810 --> 00:04:35,600
Every-birdie knows
you can't go wrong
79
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:39,230
when you start
your day out with a song!
80
00:04:39,230 --> 00:04:41,690
[animals]
♪ Oh, it's time to sing the-- ♪
81
00:04:41,690 --> 00:04:43,020
No singing, please!
82
00:04:44,020 --> 00:04:46,100
[animals groan]
83
00:04:46,100 --> 00:04:48,140
Look, I'm not whoever
you think I am.
84
00:04:48,140 --> 00:04:51,270
I'm not a princess,
and I definitely do not sing.
85
00:04:51,270 --> 00:04:54,350
Well, of course
you're a princess, silly.
86
00:04:54,350 --> 00:04:57,810
Your father Thanos
ruled a whole planet!
87
00:04:57,810 --> 00:05:00,690
Plus you've got
a wicked stepsister.
88
00:05:00,690 --> 00:05:04,060
And such beautiful
flowing hair.
89
00:05:04,060 --> 00:05:05,520
Really?
90
00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:07,310
No! I don't have time for this.
91
00:05:07,310 --> 00:05:08,940
[animals groan]
92
00:05:08,940 --> 00:05:10,640
You're trying
to distract me.
93
00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:13,140
I have to find my gear
so I can look for my friends.
94
00:05:13,140 --> 00:05:15,230
Maybe if you
cleaned the place up,
95
00:05:15,230 --> 00:05:17,730
you'll find what
you're looking for, Princess.
96
00:05:17,730 --> 00:05:19,690
I don't clean up
after people.
97
00:05:19,690 --> 00:05:22,480
I save the galaxy,
and people clean up after me!
98
00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:26,900
Oh, you'll never
find your things
with that attitude.
99
00:05:26,900 --> 00:05:28,230
Come on, Princess!
100
00:05:28,230 --> 00:05:30,770
Ugh! Fine.
101
00:05:31,900 --> 00:05:34,140
♪♪ [animals whistling]
102
00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:41,480
[groans]
103
00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:44,560
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
104
00:05:44,560 --> 00:05:47,140
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
105
00:05:47,140 --> 00:05:49,940
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
106
00:05:47,140 --> 00:05:49,940
[groans]
107
00:05:49,940 --> 00:05:52,020
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
108
00:05:52,020 --> 00:05:53,020
[Gamora approaching]
109
00:05:59,100 --> 00:06:01,730
[animals]
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
110
00:06:01,730 --> 00:06:04,190
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
111
00:06:04,190 --> 00:06:06,940
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
112
00:06:06,940 --> 00:06:08,850
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
113
00:06:08,850 --> 00:06:11,730
Why is there so much
talk of whistling
in a song that's all sung?
114
00:06:11,730 --> 00:06:14,190
Don't question it.
Just sing.
115
00:06:14,190 --> 00:06:17,350
You sing to pass the time
while you're working.
116
00:06:17,350 --> 00:06:19,560
And you work
to give you something to do
117
00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:21,640
while you're singing!
118
00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:21,640
[groans]
119
00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:24,600
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
120
00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:27,190
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
121
00:06:27,190 --> 00:06:29,940
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
122
00:06:29,940 --> 00:06:32,060
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
123
00:06:32,060 --> 00:06:33,980
I just cleaned that.
124
00:06:33,980 --> 00:06:37,690
And now you get
to clean it again.
Hooray!
125
00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,440
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
126
00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:44,140
[groans, huffs]
127
00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:44,140
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
128
00:06:44,140 --> 00:06:47,140
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
129
00:06:44,140 --> 00:06:47,140
[gasps]
130
00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:50,140
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
131
00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:50,140
[evil chuckle]
132
00:06:55,730 --> 00:06:57,980
[radio static]
133
00:06:55,730 --> 00:06:57,980
Hmm?
134
00:06:57,980 --> 00:06:59,310
Huh?
135
00:06:59,310 --> 00:07:00,600
[gasps]
136
00:06:59,310 --> 00:07:00,600
Mmm!
137
00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:03,230
Ooh, look what I found.
138
00:07:03,230 --> 00:07:05,190
You vermin
stole my comm link!
139
00:07:03,230 --> 00:07:05,190
[shatters]
140
00:07:05,190 --> 00:07:07,850
[comm link chirps]
141
00:07:05,190 --> 00:07:07,850
Quill! Rocket!
142
00:07:07,850 --> 00:07:10,060
Can anyone read me?
143
00:07:10,060 --> 00:07:13,440
[static over comm link]
144
00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:16,060
Where's my blade?
145
00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:16,060
[whimpering]
146
00:07:16,060 --> 00:07:18,640
Uh, I don't know.
[chuckles]
147
00:07:18,640 --> 00:07:21,140
Maybe if we finish
dusting the armoire--
[squeaks]
148
00:07:21,140 --> 00:07:22,730
I've done enough cleaning.
149
00:07:22,730 --> 00:07:24,730
Blade or no blade,
I'm getting out of here.
150
00:07:26,230 --> 00:07:29,020
A princess can't go out
dressed like that.
151
00:07:31,190 --> 00:07:32,900
[groans]
152
00:07:32,900 --> 00:07:35,600
A princess can dress any way
she krutacking pleases.
153
00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:37,600
But I'm not
that kind of princess!
154
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:40,690
Come on, Princess!
155
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:40,690
[chatter, laughter]
156
00:07:43,020 --> 00:07:44,900
[Gamora grunts]
157
00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:46,100
I said no!
158
00:07:46,100 --> 00:07:48,310
[animals gasp]
159
00:07:48,310 --> 00:07:52,940
But-- But we worked
all night on that dress.
160
00:07:52,940 --> 00:07:54,230
[crying]
161
00:07:54,230 --> 00:07:56,690
Stop that. Stop crying.
162
00:07:56,690 --> 00:07:59,640
[crying]
163
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:04,100
I told ya
you wouldn't like me
when I'm sad.
164
00:08:04,100 --> 00:08:05,770
[crying]
165
00:08:04,100 --> 00:08:05,770
[electricity crackling]
166
00:08:08,350 --> 00:08:10,770
[yelling]
167
00:08:12,140 --> 00:08:15,230
[growling]
168
00:08:18,900 --> 00:08:21,690
[grunts]
Aw, flarg.
169
00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:25,230
[roaring]
170
00:08:25,230 --> 00:08:27,770
[animals roaring]
171
00:08:31,100 --> 00:08:33,520
Look, I don't want to hurt you.
172
00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:40,480
They're not real.
173
00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:42,900
They're not real!
[yells]
174
00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:42,900
[screeching]
175
00:08:42,900 --> 00:08:45,600
[grunting]
176
00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:48,230
[screeching]
177
00:08:48,230 --> 00:08:49,810
[grunts]
178
00:08:49,810 --> 00:08:52,190
[growling]
179
00:08:52,190 --> 00:08:54,190
How many of those things
are there?
180
00:08:57,560 --> 00:08:59,400
[evil bleating]
181
00:09:01,690 --> 00:09:03,900
[hisses]
182
00:09:05,810 --> 00:09:08,270
[hissing]
183
00:09:05,810 --> 00:09:08,270
[screeching]
184
00:09:10,230 --> 00:09:11,400
[yells]
185
00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:13,400
[yelling]
186
00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:18,900
[angry chittering]
187
00:09:19,980 --> 00:09:22,850
[snarling]
188
00:09:22,850 --> 00:09:24,100
Yes!
189
00:09:25,810 --> 00:09:29,980
Every-bunny,
meet the most dangerous
princess in the galaxy.
190
00:09:29,980 --> 00:09:32,060
[screeching, growling]
191
00:09:38,190 --> 00:09:39,600
[growling]
192
00:09:53,690 --> 00:09:55,060
[grunts]
193
00:09:58,600 --> 00:09:59,690
[yells]
194
00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:04,140
Aaahhh!
195
00:10:11,060 --> 00:10:14,060
[angry hissing, chittering]
196
00:10:17,810 --> 00:10:19,810
[animals growling]
197
00:10:17,810 --> 00:10:19,810
[owl screeches]
198
00:10:24,020 --> 00:10:25,810
[clamoring]
199
00:10:30,600 --> 00:10:32,140
[yells]
200
00:10:36,060 --> 00:10:37,140
[squeaks]
201
00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:41,640
[yells]
202
00:10:57,560 --> 00:10:59,690
Well, that was... sparkly.
203
00:10:59,690 --> 00:11:02,100
But I've got friends to find.
204
00:11:02,100 --> 00:11:04,140
♪♪ [whistling
the whistling song tune]
205
00:11:17,730 --> 00:11:19,900
What is this place?
206
00:11:21,310 --> 00:11:24,690
And why am I so uncomfortable?
207
00:11:24,690 --> 00:11:27,900
What sinister horror is this?
Drax does not wear sweaters!
208
00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:32,060
And what has happened
to Groot and the others?
209
00:11:32,060 --> 00:11:34,310
And why do I persist
in talking to myself?
210
00:11:34,310 --> 00:11:36,190
[man]
A hero? Don't make me laugh!
211
00:11:36,190 --> 00:11:39,190
Mark my words,
Drax-Man is up to no good,
212
00:11:39,190 --> 00:11:42,140
or my name's
not J. Jonah J'Son!
213
00:11:42,140 --> 00:11:44,440
Yeah? Well,
same to you... Mom!
214
00:11:44,440 --> 00:11:45,940
[ringer bell on phone dings]
215
00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:50,060
Drax!
Where's my Drax-Man photos?
216
00:11:50,060 --> 00:11:52,060
"Drax-Man"?
217
00:11:52,060 --> 00:11:53,900
Yeah. Drax-Man.
218
00:11:53,900 --> 00:11:56,640
You know, the elusive,
costumed vigilante
219
00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:59,770
who sells my papers
and pays your rent.
220
00:11:59,770 --> 00:12:04,230
I want fresh, new,
incriminating photos
of that bare-chested menace
221
00:12:04,230 --> 00:12:06,730
on my desk by 4:00!
222
00:12:09,100 --> 00:12:11,730
That angry man
resembles Quill's father,
223
00:12:11,730 --> 00:12:17,100
but that is not possible,
for J'Son of Spartax
does not have gray hair.
224
00:12:17,100 --> 00:12:19,560
Also, he is not alive.
225
00:12:19,560 --> 00:12:22,020
Hmm. I suspect that I
226
00:12:22,020 --> 00:12:26,230
am actually the costumed
adventurer Drax-Man.
227
00:12:22,020 --> 00:12:26,230
[narrator] No one suspects
228
00:12:26,230 --> 00:12:28,980
that mild-mannered
photographer Drax is actually
229
00:12:28,980 --> 00:12:32,730
the costumed adventurer
Drax-Man.
230
00:12:28,980 --> 00:12:32,730
Who said that?
231
00:12:32,730 --> 00:12:35,230
The mystery of his
amazing double-identity
232
00:12:35,230 --> 00:12:37,560
was revealed
in issue number 32,
233
00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:40,560
"The Secret Origin
of Drax-Man!"
234
00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:40,560
[squawks]
235
00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,520
I was just in an office.
236
00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:44,940
How did I come to be
in this vehicle?
237
00:12:44,940 --> 00:12:48,140
Real estate agent/saxophone
enthusiast Arthur Douglas
238
00:12:48,140 --> 00:12:50,690
was driving home to Burbank
from a concert in Las Vegas.
239
00:12:50,690 --> 00:12:54,850
I do not recall this.
Nor do I know the meaning
of half of those words.
240
00:12:54,850 --> 00:12:57,310
Suddenly, an alien
spacecraft appeared,
241
00:12:57,310 --> 00:13:00,400
piloted by
the Mad Titan Thanos.
242
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:01,850
[growls]
243
00:13:01,850 --> 00:13:04,100
Thanos attacked...
244
00:13:05,100 --> 00:13:06,900
destroying the vehicle,
245
00:13:06,900 --> 00:13:10,230
[evil laughter]
246
00:13:06,900 --> 00:13:10,230
laughing evilly the whole time.
247
00:13:10,230 --> 00:13:13,100
[evil laughter]
248
00:13:13,100 --> 00:13:16,310
Although he was thrown clear
of the explosion,
249
00:13:16,310 --> 00:13:19,520
Douglas was badly injured
and barely alive.
250
00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:23,060
This never happened.
251
00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:23,060
Stop breaking the fourth wall.
252
00:13:23,060 --> 00:13:26,640
I see no wall to break here,
let alone four walls.
253
00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:27,900
[groans]
254
00:13:27,900 --> 00:13:30,020
As I was saying,
255
00:13:30,020 --> 00:13:33,400
his astral form was pulled
from his physical body
256
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,270
and instantly transported
across the galaxy.
257
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,480
This story seems extremely
far-fetched and confusing.
258
00:13:46,940 --> 00:13:51,100
The Eternal Being Kronos
gave Douglas
a powerful new body,
259
00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:54,230
transforming him into
the living weapon of vengeance
260
00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:56,640
known as Drax-Man.
261
00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:59,900
[yells, grunts]
262
00:13:59,900 --> 00:14:02,190
How did I get back here?
263
00:14:02,190 --> 00:14:06,140
And why do I feel
a tingling sensation?
Why is the world all blurry?
264
00:14:06,140 --> 00:14:09,520
Without warning,
Drax-Man's Drax-sense
starts tingling,
265
00:14:09,520 --> 00:14:13,060
alerting him
that an innocent life
is in danger somewhere nearby.
266
00:14:13,060 --> 00:14:16,140
Ah, that would explain it.
267
00:14:16,140 --> 00:14:17,980
[gasps]
268
00:14:18,980 --> 00:14:20,400
Drax-Man!
269
00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:23,020
Drax-Man is in the building!
Somebody get a camera!
270
00:14:27,190 --> 00:14:30,520
Don't just stand there, Drax!
Drax-Man is in the building!
271
00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:34,400
Go get me those photos!
Do I have to do
everything myself?
272
00:14:36,190 --> 00:14:39,940
Drax-Man. Great Caesar's ghost,
he appeared out of thin air.
273
00:14:39,940 --> 00:14:43,600
Security! Security!
274
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:46,520
Security!
For crying out loud, Drax!
275
00:14:46,520 --> 00:14:50,020
Drax-Man shows up here twice,
and you don't get
a single picture?
276
00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:52,060
You're fired!
[echoing]
277
00:14:52,060 --> 00:14:55,060
Suddenly remembering that
someone is still in danger,
278
00:14:55,060 --> 00:14:58,310
Drax ducks
into a supply closet.
279
00:14:58,310 --> 00:15:02,230
Uh, Drax ducks
into a supply closet.
280
00:15:02,230 --> 00:15:05,020
For a disembodied voice,
you are very demanding.
281
00:15:06,850 --> 00:15:09,400
Without a moment to spare,
282
00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:11,850
Drax transforms
into the incredible Drax-Man...
283
00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:14,850
[sniffs]
284
00:15:14,850 --> 00:15:17,350
and springs into action.
285
00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:19,640
Too late.
Drax-Man remembers
286
00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:21,640
that he cannot fly.
287
00:15:22,980 --> 00:15:24,440
[clattering]
288
00:15:28,850 --> 00:15:31,270
[groans]
289
00:15:28,850 --> 00:15:31,270
[car alarm blaring]
290
00:15:31,270 --> 00:15:33,270
You could've
mentioned that earlier.
291
00:15:33,270 --> 00:15:35,810
[woman]
Help! Someone, please, help!
292
00:15:35,810 --> 00:15:40,600
Give it up, lady.
This is a robbery,
not a tug o' war.
293
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:42,060
[grunts, groans]
294
00:15:42,060 --> 00:15:45,020
Oh, thank you, Drax-Man!
295
00:15:45,020 --> 00:15:49,020
You're a genuine hero,
no matter what
J. Jonah J'Son says.
296
00:15:49,020 --> 00:15:53,230
Justice served, Drax-Man
basks in the adulation
297
00:15:49,020 --> 00:15:53,230
[fans cheering]
298
00:15:53,230 --> 00:15:56,440
of his grateful
but hastily drawn fans.
299
00:15:57,480 --> 00:16:00,640
[cheering, shouting]
300
00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:03,310
This feels pleasant
and very appropriate.
301
00:16:03,310 --> 00:16:05,310
[Gamora on comm link]
Drax, is that you?
302
00:16:05,310 --> 00:16:07,690
Gamora, I can barely hear you.
303
00:16:07,690 --> 00:16:10,230
I can't reach the others.
Something is blocking
our comms.
304
00:16:10,230 --> 00:16:11,900
[narrator]
Unknown to Drax-Man,
305
00:16:11,900 --> 00:16:14,560
Gamora is secretly
his arch-nemesis.
306
00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:17,440
Every word she said to him
was a lie.
307
00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:20,060
[handcuffs clink]
308
00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:20,060
Not true.
Gamora is my friend.
309
00:16:20,060 --> 00:16:22,690
Drax only believes Gamora
is his friend
310
00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:26,190
because his memory was erased
back in issue number 219.
311
00:16:26,190 --> 00:16:28,190
I do not remember that!
312
00:16:28,190 --> 00:16:29,730
What did I just say?
313
00:16:29,730 --> 00:16:31,520
[Gamora]
Drax, listen. You're in danger.
314
00:16:31,520 --> 00:16:34,100
Wherever you are,
get out of there!
315
00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:37,060
[narrator]
Is exactly the sort of thing
a lying arch-nemesis
316
00:16:37,060 --> 00:16:39,190
would tell our noble hero.
317
00:16:39,190 --> 00:16:41,310
Gamora, I do not understand.
318
00:16:41,310 --> 00:16:42,940
[Gamora]
Run!
319
00:16:42,940 --> 00:16:44,640
That I understand.
320
00:16:50,940 --> 00:16:51,980
[thud]
321
00:17:01,100 --> 00:17:04,020
Ah, this must be
the fourth wall
you mentioned earlier,
322
00:17:04,020 --> 00:17:05,850
and yet Drax
did not break it.
323
00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:09,850
[narrator]
Tricked by his sinister
arch-nemesis Gamora,
324
00:17:09,850 --> 00:17:13,980
Drax-Man is trapped
and faces certain doom.
325
00:17:13,980 --> 00:17:17,310
It appears this fourth wall
is about to break Drax!
326
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:25,190
Drax will break the fourth wall
before the fourth wall
breaks Drax!
327
00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:30,600
[narrator]
Desperate to escape his fate,
328
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:34,140
Drax-Man lands himself
in even deeper jeopardy.
329
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:36,020
He's part of
a balanced breakfast.
330
00:17:36,020 --> 00:17:39,310
But can Drax-Man stay crunchy?
331
00:17:39,310 --> 00:17:41,770
But Drax does not wish
to stay crunchy.
332
00:17:41,770 --> 00:17:43,940
This does not even make sense.
333
00:17:46,310 --> 00:17:48,190
[roars]
334
00:17:48,190 --> 00:17:50,400
[Gamora on comm link]
Drax, where are you?
335
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:52,520
I am facing down
a very flimsy monster...
336
00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:53,810
[roars]
337
00:17:56,140 --> 00:17:58,140
a child with poor eyesight...
338
00:18:02,810 --> 00:18:05,100
and a puny bookseller.
339
00:18:05,100 --> 00:18:06,850
[machinery whirring]
340
00:18:06,850 --> 00:18:10,440
This place is becoming
very irritating.
341
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,190
[Gamora]
Easy, Drax.
342
00:18:12,190 --> 00:18:15,520
We have to find a way
out of... wherever you are.
343
00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:17,810
Tell me what you see.
344
00:18:19,310 --> 00:18:21,940
The machine is printing up
copies of a common thief
345
00:18:21,940 --> 00:18:23,560
I defeated earlier.
346
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,270
[narrator]
That's no common thief.
347
00:18:25,270 --> 00:18:27,100
It's the duplicate desperado
348
00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:29,640
known as Print-Press Paul.
349
00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:31,230
That is a terrible name.
350
00:18:31,230 --> 00:18:35,810
Oh, like "Drax-Man"
is so great?
351
00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:37,850
[yelling]
352
00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:37,850
[sneers]
353
00:18:42,230 --> 00:18:43,270
Get him, boys!
354
00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:51,270
[grunts]
355
00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:55,440
Yes!
[charging yell]
356
00:18:55,440 --> 00:18:59,480
Drax shall fold, spindle,
and staple all who oppose him!
357
00:19:01,940 --> 00:19:04,940
But no matter how many
Drax-Man defeats,
358
00:19:04,940 --> 00:19:07,140
the printing press
keeps printing more.
359
00:19:07,140 --> 00:19:08,940
That does not seem fair.
360
00:19:10,940 --> 00:19:14,230
Your villainous machine
cannot print without ink.
361
00:19:14,230 --> 00:19:15,270
[grunts]
Aah!
362
00:19:17,190 --> 00:19:19,900
[all whimpering]
363
00:19:19,900 --> 00:19:22,480
I'm melting!
364
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:25,350
[all yelling]
365
00:19:25,350 --> 00:19:27,190
What a world!
366
00:19:27,190 --> 00:19:29,100
Ha! I have beaten you
367
00:19:29,100 --> 00:19:31,770
at your own game,
colorful miscreants.
368
00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:37,600
It is possible I did not
think this through carefully.
369
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:40,520
[all yell]
370
00:19:42,690 --> 00:19:45,270
The branch!
371
00:19:42,690 --> 00:19:45,270
[whimpering]
372
00:19:45,270 --> 00:19:48,140
[Gamora] Drax? Drax,
what's happening now?
373
00:19:45,270 --> 00:19:48,140
[grunts]
374
00:19:48,140 --> 00:19:51,600
Drax is defeating his foes...
with the power of art!
375
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,400
[narrator]
As the ink level rises,
376
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:58,060
the all-consuming deluge
splashes onto Drax-Man.
377
00:19:58,060 --> 00:20:00,810
Your clever words
cannot defeat Drax the Inker,
378
00:20:00,810 --> 00:20:04,190
for the pen is mightier
than the sword!
379
00:20:04,190 --> 00:20:07,400
[laughing]
380
00:20:04,190 --> 00:20:07,400
[Gamora] Wait, Drax.
Was that a metaphor?
381
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:09,690
[narrator]
Drax is safe for the moment,
382
00:20:09,690 --> 00:20:12,100
but the rising ink
carries him ever closer
383
00:20:12,100 --> 00:20:14,900
to the razor-sharp high-speed
fans in the ceiling.
384
00:20:14,900 --> 00:20:18,810
Uh, what's that
supposed to be?
385
00:20:14,900 --> 00:20:18,810
It is a blaster.
386
00:20:20,350 --> 00:20:23,190
Hey, Picasso,
don't quit your day job.
387
00:20:23,190 --> 00:20:25,350
You will not defeat me,
disembodied voice.
388
00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:27,310
I will use this magical branch
389
00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:30,060
to paint something
that will silence you for good.
390
00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:32,190
[Gamora]
Drax, did you say you have
a magical branch
391
00:20:32,190 --> 00:20:34,230
that can paint
anything you want?
392
00:20:34,230 --> 00:20:37,140
Yes. But I cannot seem to paint
a serviceable weapon.
393
00:20:37,140 --> 00:20:40,730
Then don't paint a weapon.
Paint a door
and get out of there!
394
00:20:40,730 --> 00:20:42,730
I would've thought of that,
eventually.
395
00:20:42,730 --> 00:20:46,140
[narrator]
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Drax. Drax. Drax-Man. Buddy.
396
00:20:46,140 --> 00:20:47,940
Doesn't have to end like this.
397
00:20:47,940 --> 00:20:51,400
If you stay here, this world
could be your plaything.
398
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:55,140
Think about it.
Why would you leave a world
399
00:20:55,140 --> 00:20:59,020
where you can paint anything
your heart desires?
400
00:20:59,020 --> 00:21:01,770
What my heart desires
is my friends,
401
00:21:01,770 --> 00:21:04,060
and a way out
of this unpleasant place.
402
00:21:04,060 --> 00:21:07,770
So I will be leaving now,
and doing my own narration.
403
00:21:07,770 --> 00:21:10,810
[paint squelching]
404
00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:18,020
[yells]
405
00:21:20,690 --> 00:21:24,600
[Drax narrating]
And so, Drax the Inker defeats
the annoying disembodied voice,
406
00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:29,270
takes control of his destiny,
and sets off
for new adventures.
407
00:21:29,270 --> 00:21:31,140
To be continued.
29185
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