Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:08,800
Gomorr... Gomorrah'd.
2
00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:12,400
She got Gomorrah'd.
3
00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:33,680
Fucking thing.
4
00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:37,880
Mm... Oh, I needed that.
5
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:39,880
- Who is it today?
- Arachne.
6
00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:41,280
Looks like you're getting on OK.
7
00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:43,400
Yeah, not too bad.
I'm just...
8
00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:45,960
I hate having to do the
crossword on a bloody A4.
9
00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:48,080
It's always wet or bumpy.
10
00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:49,280
Why have you printed it out?
11
00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:50,880
Why aren't you doing it
in the newspaper?
12
00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:52,280
You've got our newspaper.
13
00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:56,240
- Are you serious?
- You know you have.
14
00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:59,520
It's not our newspaper, is it?
It's just a newspaper.
15
00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:01,320
Why don't you buy another one?
16
00:01:01,440 --> 00:01:03,400
You know that they cost
two quid now, don't you?
17
00:01:03,520 --> 00:01:05,040
That'd be four quid a day.
18
00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:07,080
Except it's not four quid a day
because we're separate people.
19
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,040
We don't live together.
Might as well add up
20
00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:11,080
all the money your friends
spend on the Guardian
21
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:13,480
- and say it's 50 quid a day.
- More like six.
22
00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:15,840
Oh, for God's sakes.
You've got hundreds of friends.
23
00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:18,880
Lots of friends.
24
00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:20,400
Now, look, how about this?
25
00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:22,200
If you move back in,
don't buy a second paper.
26
00:01:22,320 --> 00:01:24,760
Oh, my God,
how is this about our marriage?
27
00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:27,640
How come every conversation
ends up at our marriage?
28
00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:30,880
I thought that a stupid printout
of a crossword was safe ground.
29
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:33,920
- You've never heard of subtext?
- Yes,
30
00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:36,520
but I think you're reading
too much into it,
31
00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:39,120
as my mother used to say when
I talked to her about Bob Dylan.
32
00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:42,760
- Was she right or wrong?
- She was wrong. I'm right.
33
00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:44,320
Sometimes a crossword
is just a crossword
34
00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:46,640
and it's hard to do
when the paper gets wet.
35
00:01:46,760 --> 00:01:49,640
This conversation could have
gone an entirely different way.
36
00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:51,920
For instance?
37
00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:53,440
You could have not mentioned
the wet paper.
38
00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:54,640
I wouldn't have, had I known
39
00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:56,480
that complaining
about the wet paper...
40
00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:57,920
I know it's not
a frivolous complaint.
41
00:01:58,040 --> 00:01:59,800
If I had known that complaining
about the wet paper
42
00:01:59,920 --> 00:02:01,800
was gonna turn into the opening
scene of a Bergman film.
43
00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:03,480
Shall we just start this again?
44
00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:40,440
- That's better.
- Now the fucking ink's blotchy.
45
00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:42,560
Oh, Jesus Christ.
46
00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:44,160
- Have I gone wrong already?
- Yes.
47
00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:45,520
How?
48
00:02:45,640 --> 00:02:47,120
I wanted you to ask me
what sort of day I've had.
49
00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:49,080
How was I supposed
to know that?
50
00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:54,040
What sort of day have you had?
51
00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:57,200
- It's too late now.
- Oh.
52
00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:59,080
Have you noticed how
we only seem to be able to talk
53
00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:00,280
about the last few seconds?
54
00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:02,280
That's not true. Is it?
55
00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,840
Yes. We start talking and then
somebody says the wrong thing.
56
00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:06,160
Then we spend
the rest of the time
57
00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:07,680
talking about the wrong thing
somebody said.
58
00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:09,480
Happens in here,
it happens in counseling.
59
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:11,880
We always come out in exactly
the same place we went in.
60
00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:14,360
Or a little further back,
usually.
61
00:03:14,480 --> 00:03:16,600
- Well, how do we stop that?
- I don't know.
62
00:03:17,640 --> 00:03:19,080
What happened last week?
63
00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,840
I can't remember.
I remember...
64
00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:26,360
we were having a conversation
about our future spouses,
65
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,160
which we both rather enjoyed.
66
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:30,160
Then what? Oh, she asked us
how the week had been.
67
00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:31,560
Yeah, she always does that.
68
00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:33,120
Yes, and then...
69
00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:34,640
Did we have the argument
70
00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:37,280
about the cost
of the cat's anti-depressants?
71
00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:38,640
Or was that the week before?
72
00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:40,360
Oh, my God,
it was Call the Midwife.
73
00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:41,880
Oh, yes.
74
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,760
- That didn't get us very far.
- I thought it was useful.
75
00:03:44,880 --> 00:03:45,960
In what way?
76
00:03:46,080 --> 00:03:47,800
Well, she interrupted you
a couple of times
77
00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:49,720
to let me finish.
You never let me finish.
78
00:03:49,840 --> 00:03:52,960
So it taught me the value
of counseling in safe spaces.
79
00:03:53,080 --> 00:03:55,080
I only interrupt when you talk
about Call the Midwife
80
00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:57,000
because there's no end
to your loathing.
81
00:03:57,120 --> 00:04:00,360
You know, I quite enjoy it.
I find it rather relaxing.
82
00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:02,440
- Well, you shouldn't.
- I shouldn't?
83
00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:07,880
Why can't you find the films
of Preston Sturges relaxing?
84
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,560
- Can I make a confession?
- Within reason.
85
00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:12,840
I don't really like
black and white movies.
86
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:15,320
I mean, I can see
that they're good, some of them.
87
00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:18,200
But I just...
There's something about them
88
00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:20,400
that feels a bit like
eating your greens.
89
00:04:23,280 --> 00:04:24,840
- The Palm Beach Story?
- Yes.
90
00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:29,440
- Maltese Falcon?
- Yes.
91
00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:34,840
- Jules et Jim?
- Yes.
92
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:36,560
I feel... I'm worried.
I'm worried here
93
00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:38,960
that you're gonna name every
black and white film ever made
94
00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:40,640
and I'm gonna say yes
to all of them.
95
00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:42,520
Oh, my God, I just...
I had no idea.
96
00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:45,360
I'm just not a critic.
You know? I like what I like.
97
00:04:45,480 --> 00:04:48,120
You like what you like?
98
00:04:48,240 --> 00:04:49,760
Oh, man.
99
00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:51,520
I just never thought
I'd end up with someone
100
00:04:51,640 --> 00:04:53,880
who would say that
and mean it.
101
00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:55,520
I mean, what does that make me?
102
00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:57,920
I don't know. Maybe
you're reading too much into it.
103
00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:00,440
But this is the trouble.
Marriage is like a computer.
104
00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:02,520
You open it up
to see what's inside
105
00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,520
and then you're left
with a million little bits.
106
00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:06,760
Yeah, but how about this?
We shove the big parts back in,
107
00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:07,960
chuck all the small ones away,
108
00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:09,240
close it up
and get on with things.
109
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:10,560
- But it won't work.
- It won't work
110
00:05:10,680 --> 00:05:12,000
but it will look
like a computer.
111
00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:13,640
You're after marriage
that looks like a marriage
112
00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:14,840
but won't function?
113
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,280
It might be better
than the one I've got.
114
00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:17,680
At the moment I have a husband
who won't sleep with me
115
00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,160
and lives somewhere else.
116
00:05:19,280 --> 00:05:20,720
I might as well tell everyone
I'm married to Brad Pitt.
117
00:05:20,840 --> 00:05:22,160
OK, well, good luck getting him
118
00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:23,720
to watch
Call the bloody Midwife.
119
00:05:23,840 --> 00:05:25,200
He doesn't have to watch it.
120
00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:27,360
He just has to not bang on
about how much he hates it.
121
00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:28,880
We're drifting off the subject.
122
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:30,960
Shall we do a couple of
crossword clues before we go in
123
00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:33,240
as a kind of
morale-boosting exercise?
124
00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:35,240
Oh, God, that's wet.
That's a bit annoying.
125
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:41,640
Um... "Game of cricket
put strain on marriage".
126
00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:46,680
- Test match.
- That's a pretty easy one.
127
00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:48,560
I usually leave those
till the end.
128
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:51,560
Remember we're team-building,
not point-scoring.
129
00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:58,120
"Party touring Russian capital
to shared bed."
130
00:05:58,240 --> 00:05:59,840
Are you just picking out
the clues about marriage?
131
00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:02,600
No. Shared bed
doesn't mean marriage.
132
00:06:02,720 --> 00:06:06,200
- As we now know.
- OK, let's do another one.
133
00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:08,640
Right, 12 across.
We need that one.
134
00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:12,560
"Rogue caught mate
dividing loot."
135
00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:13,600
Ignore the word "mate".
136
00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:15,560
Oh, no, I can't.
It's a crossword.
137
00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:19,200
Begins with S, ends with G.
138
00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:23,840
OK, well, loot is swag.
139
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:26,440
- So...
- Scallywag.
140
00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:27,640
Scallywag.
141
00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:30,640
Ally...in the swag.
142
00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:35,160
Oh, all right. Good.
Morale boosted, team rebuilt.
143
00:06:35,280 --> 00:06:37,720
Shall we actually make a plan
for this evening's session?
144
00:06:37,840 --> 00:06:39,320
Let's not go in there
and start arguing
145
00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:41,160
about something
completely bloody irrelevant.
146
00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:43,200
Let's go in with an agenda.
147
00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:44,480
What are the big pieces
148
00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:46,960
that we want to shove back
into the computer?
149
00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:48,760
I don't even know
if computers have big pieces.
150
00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:50,240
Well, they must.
They must.
151
00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:53,720
I mean, there's batteries
and valves and, um...
152
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:56,440
Not microchips.
They're small.
153
00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:58,840
You know, I could take apart
that dead computer at the house.
154
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:01,120
I could bring it home after
I've had dinner with the boys.
155
00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:03,040
Would that be
a good use of your time?
156
00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:07,320
I mean, as good
as anything else.
157
00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:09,840
I hate you not having
anything to do.
158
00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:11,800
Oh, thank you.
So do I.
159
00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:13,920
I suppose I meant it
sympathetically, but also I...
160
00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:15,840
I just...
161
00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:18,040
I find it embarrassing.
162
00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:22,040
- Oh.
- Sorry.
163
00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:26,720
You haven't started
that biography yet?
164
00:07:26,840 --> 00:07:29,040
I'm still researching.
165
00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:31,400
I may need to go to Cabo Verde.
166
00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:33,440
Where your guy came from?
What was his name again?
167
00:07:33,560 --> 00:07:35,000
Horace Silver.
168
00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:36,920
Really? I thought you decided
on someone else in the end.
169
00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:38,920
- Turned out to not be the end.
- Right.
170
00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:40,560
So, Horace came
from Cabo Verde?
171
00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:42,360
No, his Dad.
172
00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:45,040
You're going to Cabo Verde
because his Dad was born there?
173
00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:46,640
How many copies
is this book going to sell?
174
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:48,720
Not nearly enough
to cover the cost of the flight.
175
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:50,360
- So...
- Yes, expensive,
176
00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:53,080
and, you know, pointless.
177
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:55,120
I probably won't go.
178
00:07:55,240 --> 00:07:56,720
Probably won't even
write the book.
179
00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:58,360
I don't know
why I say any of this shit.
180
00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:00,160
To give yourself hope.
That's understandable.
181
00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:03,040
Yeah, but I don't think
there is much hope.
182
00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:04,400
I mean...
183
00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:07,000
...the world has changed.
184
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:09,280
Nobody wants a music writer.
185
00:08:09,400 --> 00:08:11,480
There's no paid work.
Time has moved on.
186
00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:15,360
I'm like a... I'm like
a coal miner or a blacksmith.
187
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:18,800
What's it like being married
to an unemployed blacksmith?
188
00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:20,600
Look, you couldn't see
the internet coming
189
00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:23,640
just like blacksmiths
couldn't see cars coming.
190
00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:26,120
They should have seen
cars coming. I mean...
191
00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:27,440
It was only a matter of time.
192
00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:29,120
You're saying you're smarter
than a blacksmith?
193
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:30,360
Not as such.
I'm just saying
194
00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:33,240
if my father
had been a blacksmith
195
00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:35,480
and then he had given me
the keys to his shop,
196
00:08:35,600 --> 00:08:38,600
I would have been like,
"Hold on. Hold on, Dad.
197
00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:41,320
"This is in...
This is in the past, isn't it?"
198
00:08:41,440 --> 00:08:43,000
Right, so now if you prove to me
199
00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:44,840
that you are smarter
than a blacksmith,
200
00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:47,440
how far down the road towards
marital harmony will it get us?
201
00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:48,880
I was just defending myself.
202
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,080
You were attacking blacksmiths
for their bad choices.
203
00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,480
I need to take pleasure
where I can get it.
204
00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:56,600
Attacking blacksmiths
is pretty much where I'm at.
205
00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:01,840
Are you thinking
we should give Kenyon up?
206
00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:03,400
Yes.
207
00:09:03,520 --> 00:09:07,160
A thousand times...
Yes, every week.
208
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:10,000
- Why, are you?
- I don't know.
209
00:09:10,120 --> 00:09:12,520
We're going backwards,
like you said.
210
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,480
Oh!
211
00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:18,320
Well, he's not getting
any quicker.
212
00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:22,960
Well, she is a counselor,
not a personal trainer.
213
00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:30,520
How are you getting on?
214
00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:34,040
- What?
- With Kenyon?
215
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:37,600
We couldn't help but notice you
knocking on the door last week.
216
00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:41,840
Er, I mean, I believe
it's a private matter, isn't it?
217
00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:45,760
- We've watched you coming out.
- No.
218
00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,840
Speak for yourself.
I'm sorry about her.
219
00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:51,200
I'm not interested in other
people's personal business.
220
00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:53,880
We think
she's very good.
221
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:56,400
We've been seeing her
on and off for years.
222
00:09:56,520 --> 00:10:00,040
You know, different problems,
different stages of life.
223
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:02,640
At the beginning you have
to get through all the hurt
224
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:06,160
and all the petty niggles.
225
00:10:06,280 --> 00:10:11,400
It takes time, but you're young
and you've got lots of it.
226
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:14,440
Anyway...
227
00:10:16,320 --> 00:10:18,040
Good luck.
228
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,800
That was rather sweet,
didn't you think? Like a film.
229
00:10:26,920 --> 00:10:29,320
An elderly woman gives
a younger couple good advice
230
00:10:29,440 --> 00:10:30,960
- and saves their marriage.
- Yeah.
231
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:32,880
It was like a color film
if ever I saw one.
232
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:36,320
Did you hear what she said?
Years of hurt and niggle?
233
00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:37,720
Well, maybe
we can do it quicker.
234
00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:39,240
Not at the rate we're going.
235
00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:42,240
Not with Call the Midwife
and soggy-crossword-gate.
236
00:10:42,360 --> 00:10:43,760
We'll be going here
for 50 years.
237
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:46,280
All right,
so let's get down to it.
238
00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:47,880
What does that mean?
239
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:49,880
Give it to each other straight.
240
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,080
- No more subtext?
- No, no more subtext.
241
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:55,000
Oh, OK. Bring it on.
18754
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
