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1
00:00:00,800 --> 00:00:02,334
Previously on Mom...
2
00:00:02,336 --> 00:00:04,370
So, Regina,
tell us about you.
3
00:00:04,372 --> 00:00:06,105
I'm a money manager.
4
00:00:06,107 --> 00:00:08,374
People trust me
with millions of dollars.
5
00:00:08,376 --> 00:00:09,842
So, yeah,
6
00:00:09,844 --> 00:00:13,212
maybe I like to take the edge
off at the end of the day
7
00:00:13,214 --> 00:00:15,881
with a couple bottles of wine.
8
00:00:15,883 --> 00:00:18,384
Few shots of tequila.
9
00:00:18,386 --> 00:00:20,219
Fistful of muscle relaxers.
10
00:00:21,654 --> 00:00:24,823
I'm dating this sweet, smart,
11
00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:29,194
smokin' hot guy
who's just a train wreck.
12
00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,364
Can I ask you something?
13
00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:33,799
Sure.
14
00:00:33,801 --> 00:00:36,235
Are sober people
allowed to do coke?
15
00:00:38,338 --> 00:00:40,906
You know how I told you people
trust me with their money?
16
00:00:40,908 --> 00:00:41,907
Yeah.
17
00:00:41,909 --> 00:00:43,542
They shouldn't.
18
00:00:44,577 --> 00:00:47,346
I embezzled from my clients.
19
00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:49,081
Why?
20
00:00:49,083 --> 00:00:50,849
What kind of
question is that?
21
00:00:50,851 --> 00:00:52,084
What's a better question?
22
00:00:52,086 --> 00:00:54,353
How?
23
00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:56,155
Anyway...
24
00:00:56,157 --> 00:00:59,992
The real reason I came here
tonight was...
25
00:00:59,994 --> 00:01:03,295
I think the police might be
waiting for me at my house.
26
00:01:04,864 --> 00:01:07,666
I can't believe
they found you guilty.
27
00:01:07,668 --> 00:01:10,502
I can. I stole $3 million.
28
00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:14,073
Kind of gives you faith
in the legal system.
29
00:01:14,075 --> 00:01:15,441
(laughs)
30
00:01:15,443 --> 00:01:16,675
Shut up.
31
00:01:18,378 --> 00:01:20,079
So what
happens next?
32
00:01:20,081 --> 00:01:21,513
There's a sentencing hearing.
33
00:01:21,515 --> 00:01:23,515
I'm hoping the judge
will go easy on me
34
00:01:23,517 --> 00:01:25,217
'cause I've been
turning my life around.
35
00:01:25,219 --> 00:01:27,653
Have you?
Don't push me, Chopstick.
36
00:01:29,789 --> 00:01:31,590
Maybe they'll send you
to one of those
37
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:33,559
swanky
country club jails.
38
00:01:33,561 --> 00:01:35,227
Get real. I'm a black woman
39
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:37,029
who embezzled money
from white people.
40
00:01:37,031 --> 00:01:39,364
I'm going to jail jail.
41
00:01:39,366 --> 00:01:42,434
Someone's gonna buy my ass
for a Kit Kat bar.
42
00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:43,936
Well, it's only fair.
43
00:01:43,938 --> 00:01:45,771
Kit Kat bars helped
build that thing.
44
00:01:47,307 --> 00:01:50,442
My lawyer said it might help if
I had some character witnesses.
45
00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:52,744
Oh, so you need people
who can testify to how you've
46
00:01:52,746 --> 00:01:54,913
turned into a productive
member of society.
47
00:01:54,915 --> 00:01:57,816
Yeah.
Yikes.
48
00:01:57,818 --> 00:02:01,753
Well, it wouldn't be the first
time I've lied under oath.
49
00:02:01,755 --> 00:02:04,623
Thanks, but I was kind of hoping
for someone a little less...
50
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:05,991
sketchy.
51
00:02:05,993 --> 00:02:09,495
That's funny.
Sketchy was my street name.
52
00:02:09,497 --> 00:02:11,130
What about you, Christy?
53
00:02:11,132 --> 00:02:13,999
Oh, I'm not
squeaky clean, either.
54
00:02:14,001 --> 00:02:15,634
Especially not in Nevada.
55
00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:18,237
And parts of Utah.
56
00:02:18,239 --> 00:02:20,639
I'm not allowed
to travel abroad.
57
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:23,075
It's not
a competition, Mom.
58
00:02:23,077 --> 00:02:24,643
You'll
be great.
59
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:27,679
Just look at the judge like one
of those big-eyed kid paintings.
60
00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:28,847
He'll eat it up.
61
00:02:28,849 --> 00:02:31,650
You think?
Oh. Show me.
62
00:02:33,486 --> 00:02:36,021
Open your mouth a little, so you
look like you're about to cry.
63
00:02:38,458 --> 00:02:41,894
Tell me that doesn't look
like house arrest to you.
64
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:45,664
Come on, I can do that.
65
00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:53,872
You look like someone
who just huffed some paint.
66
00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:55,207
Okay, for that,
you're buying.
67
00:02:55,209 --> 00:02:56,642
Mom. She's
going to prison.
68
00:02:56,644 --> 00:02:58,477
Where she will eat for free.
69
00:02:58,479 --> 00:03:01,480
Come on, we're gonna
be late for the meeting.
70
00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:03,515
Oh, actually,
I can't make it.
71
00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,050
I've got to help
a friend move.
72
00:03:05,052 --> 00:03:06,051
Who's the friend?
73
00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:07,219
Do you know Denise?
74
00:03:07,221 --> 00:03:08,320
No.
75
00:03:08,322 --> 00:03:11,023
It's Denise.
76
00:03:11,025 --> 00:03:12,524
Catch you later.
77
00:03:14,961 --> 00:03:16,395
Your daughter's
an amazing woman.
78
00:03:16,397 --> 00:03:18,697
She's a lying whore.
79
00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:20,966
What?
There's no Denise.
She's going to see
80
00:03:20,968 --> 00:03:22,534
her pothead boyfriend.
81
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,002
Wow.
82
00:03:24,004 --> 00:03:25,737
All I saw was the big eyes.
83
00:03:25,739 --> 00:03:27,439
She's gonna be great
on the stand.
84
00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:29,741
You ready to go?
85
00:03:29,743 --> 00:03:32,711
Let me just use
the ladies' room.
86
00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,146
Why don't you just take a leak
87
00:03:34,148 --> 00:03:35,514
right here
in front of everybody?
88
00:03:35,516 --> 00:03:37,316
What?
89
00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:39,618
You're going to prison, you
might as well get used to it.
90
00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:00,906
You asleep?
91
00:04:00,908 --> 00:04:02,407
No.
92
00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:05,877
Just enjoying the moment.
93
00:04:05,879 --> 00:04:08,280
Me, too.
94
00:04:08,282 --> 00:04:09,548
If I tell you something,
95
00:04:09,550 --> 00:04:11,049
you promise you
won't freak out?
96
00:04:11,051 --> 00:04:14,987
I'll try. Am I gonna
need antibiotics?
97
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:19,758
No.
98
00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:23,195
I think I'm falling
in love with you.
99
00:04:23,197 --> 00:04:25,764
Oh.
100
00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:28,867
You freaked out?
101
00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:30,235
That depends.
102
00:04:30,237 --> 00:04:32,437
How high are you right now?
103
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:35,507
On a scale of Woody Harrelson
to Willie Nelson.
104
00:04:36,743 --> 00:04:38,477
Snoop Dogg.
105
00:04:39,646 --> 00:04:41,747
So you might not
remember this.
106
00:04:41,749 --> 00:04:43,348
I'll remember.
107
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:47,419
Traditionally,
this is where you say
108
00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:49,488
you're falling
in love with me.
109
00:04:50,657 --> 00:04:53,725
Oh, God.
110
00:04:53,727 --> 00:04:55,661
I might be.
111
00:04:55,663 --> 00:04:56,628
Good.
112
00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:59,164
(soft laugh)
113
00:05:01,234 --> 00:05:02,567
Mmm.
Mmm.
114
00:05:02,569 --> 00:05:04,069
You ready for round two?
115
00:05:04,071 --> 00:05:05,470
Mm. I am.
116
00:05:05,472 --> 00:05:06,972
But I have to go to work.
117
00:05:06,974 --> 00:05:09,608
No, don't go, stay.
118
00:05:09,610 --> 00:05:12,944
I'll make us waffles, I'll
read you some of my poetry.
119
00:05:12,946 --> 00:05:14,780
Seriously?
120
00:05:14,782 --> 00:05:17,249
I've got a fireman
who writes poetry?
121
00:05:17,251 --> 00:05:21,687
I prefer to think of myself
as a poet who puts out fires.
122
00:05:21,689 --> 00:05:22,754
Damn you.
123
00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:24,656
What are you doing?
124
00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:26,725
Calling in sick.
125
00:05:29,762 --> 00:05:30,862
(husky voice):
Gabriel.
126
00:05:30,864 --> 00:05:33,432
It's Christy.
127
00:05:33,434 --> 00:05:36,702
I-I think I got that thing
that's going around.
128
00:05:36,704 --> 00:05:39,338
So I won't be in today,
maybe tomorrow. Bye.
129
00:05:40,306 --> 00:05:42,140
(laughs, sighs)
130
00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:44,509
All right, I'm all yours.
131
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:47,379
Do that sick voice again.
I think it's kind of sexy.
132
00:05:47,381 --> 00:05:49,548
(husky): Kiss me.
Nope, I was wrong.
133
00:06:06,132 --> 00:06:07,366
Hey.
134
00:06:07,368 --> 00:06:09,401
Hey, where you been?
135
00:06:09,403 --> 00:06:11,370
What do you mean,
where have I been?
136
00:06:11,372 --> 00:06:13,038
Work.
137
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,407
(sighs)
What are you doing?
138
00:06:15,409 --> 00:06:16,675
Frosting cupcakes.
139
00:06:16,677 --> 00:06:18,143
What's the occasion?
140
00:06:18,145 --> 00:06:21,346
It's You Signed Up
to be Snack Mom and Forgot Day.
141
00:06:21,348 --> 00:06:23,749
Oh.
142
00:06:23,751 --> 00:06:26,952
Nope, forgetful mothers
do not get snacks.
143
00:06:28,654 --> 00:06:29,855
You know...
144
00:06:29,857 --> 00:06:31,923
cupcakes aren't a
very healthy choice.
145
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:34,826
Neither is criticizing me
for doing your freakin' job.
146
00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:39,097
Why don't I just finish
that up for you?
147
00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:41,166
Fine.
148
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:45,737
So, a long night, huh?
149
00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:47,839
Ugh, brutal.
150
00:06:47,841 --> 00:06:50,409
I'm really thinking
about going back to school.
151
00:06:50,411 --> 00:06:52,611
I cannot wait tables
my entire life.
152
00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:54,846
Good for you.
Yeah,
153
00:06:54,848 --> 00:06:57,382
I'm tired of spending
ten hours a day on my feet.
154
00:06:57,384 --> 00:07:00,786
You sure you don't
mean on your back?
155
00:07:02,455 --> 00:07:03,922
What?
156
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:06,558
Gabriel called to say
he's sorry you missed work
157
00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:08,660
and hopes you're feeling better.
158
00:07:13,966 --> 00:07:17,369
So what are you thinking
about studying in school?
159
00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:20,906
(sighs)
160
00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:22,207
All right, fine.
161
00:07:22,209 --> 00:07:24,309
I blew off work
and spent the night with David.
162
00:07:24,311 --> 00:07:25,977
But why lie about it?
163
00:07:26,946 --> 00:07:28,380
'Cause I'm kind of a liar.
164
00:07:31,717 --> 00:07:33,385
Is that where you were
when you missed
165
00:07:33,387 --> 00:07:35,954
your daughter's Lamaze
class yesterday?
166
00:07:35,956 --> 00:07:38,290
Oh, no, was that yesterday?
Don't worry,
167
00:07:38,292 --> 00:07:39,458
I covered for you.
168
00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:41,827
20 women going...
(quick, short breaths)
169
00:07:41,829 --> 00:07:43,261
...for a freakin' hour.
170
00:07:43,263 --> 00:07:45,997
It sounded like Japanese porn.
171
00:07:49,502 --> 00:07:51,603
You are the best grandmother.
172
00:07:51,605 --> 00:07:54,539
Yeah, only because
you're the worst mother.
173
00:07:55,908 --> 00:07:58,009
Look, I am not gonna tell you
how to live your life,
174
00:07:58,011 --> 00:08:00,011
but you're screwing up.
You are in over your head
175
00:08:00,013 --> 00:08:02,147
with this guy,
you need to snap out of it.
176
00:08:02,149 --> 00:08:04,950
I thought you weren't gonna
tell me how to live my life?
177
00:08:04,952 --> 00:08:07,385
You're not the only liar
in this room.
178
00:08:09,255 --> 00:08:11,156
It just so happens that
179
00:08:11,158 --> 00:08:13,358
that guy told me
he loves me tonight.
180
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:16,928
Oh, well, love.
181
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,898
That changes everything.
182
00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:23,068
You deserve a cupcake.
183
00:08:29,275 --> 00:08:31,343
(exhales)
184
00:08:36,315 --> 00:08:38,383
Not bad.
185
00:08:42,154 --> 00:08:44,956
Oh, I can't
promise anything,
186
00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:47,192
but I'll try.
187
00:08:47,194 --> 00:08:50,729
Yeah, I miss you, too.
188
00:08:51,697 --> 00:08:53,098
Hey, you sound
a lot better.
189
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:56,368
(husky):
It comes and goes.
190
00:08:57,336 --> 00:08:58,570
Well, I'm glad you're back.
191
00:08:58,572 --> 00:08:59,838
Please wash your hands.
192
00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,139
A lot.
193
00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:08,146
Hey, Paul, is Rudy still
selling weed on the side?
194
00:09:08,148 --> 00:09:10,148
RUDY:
Oh, uh, yes.
195
00:09:10,150 --> 00:09:13,485
Oh, hey, didn't see you there.
196
00:09:13,487 --> 00:09:14,986
Step into my office.
197
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:16,388
You do it in the freezer?
198
00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:18,456
Cold people don't haggle.
199
00:09:21,861 --> 00:09:24,529
So, would you like
to hear the specials?
200
00:09:24,531 --> 00:09:26,665
Okay.
201
00:09:26,667 --> 00:09:29,234
Tonight we have
a locally produced Sonoma Kush
202
00:09:29,236 --> 00:09:34,005
which pairs very well
with a lovely 1978 Quaalude.
203
00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:37,042
No, just the Kush.
204
00:09:37,044 --> 00:09:40,011
Good choice. So what are we
thinking, half a kilo?
205
00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:43,615
No, just a couple of joints.
206
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:46,017
Are you kidding me?
207
00:09:46,019 --> 00:09:49,854
I'm freezing my balls off
for a couple of joints? Look,
208
00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:52,857
Paul handles the
nickel-and-dime crap.
W-Wait, wait, uh,
209
00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:55,360
this stays just between
you and me, right?
210
00:09:55,362 --> 00:09:57,696
Absolutely. I will
protect your reputation.
211
00:09:57,698 --> 00:09:59,864
Oh, what are
you looking at?
212
00:09:59,866 --> 00:10:01,933
Yes, I'm banging
the little blonde.
213
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:07,205
(sighs)
214
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:08,974
What the hell am I doing?
215
00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:09,975
Christy.
216
00:10:09,977 --> 00:10:12,210
Yeah?! Hi! Who?!
217
00:10:12,212 --> 00:10:13,878
Oh, Regina.
218
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:15,447
You scared the crap out of me.
219
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:18,049
I need a favor and I
didn't want to bother
you in the restaurant.
220
00:10:18,051 --> 00:10:21,119
Oh, so you decided to give me a
heart attack in the parking lot?
221
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:23,588
Here, take this.
222
00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:25,890
While I'm in prison, I want
you to hold it for me.
223
00:10:25,892 --> 00:10:27,726
What's in it?
224
00:10:27,728 --> 00:10:31,296
I don't think that concerns you.
225
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:33,164
Oh, my God, is this some
of the money you stole?
226
00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:34,466
No, that's money I earned.
227
00:10:34,468 --> 00:10:37,002
But the Feds will take it
if they know I have it.
228
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:38,403
How'd you earn it?
229
00:10:38,405 --> 00:10:40,138
Selling Mary Kay cosmetics.
230
00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:43,008
Now... are you still good
for being my character witness
231
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:44,275
in court tomorrow?
232
00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:46,511
Yeah, yeah, sure.
233
00:10:47,413 --> 00:10:48,813
Should I bring the box
234
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,415
of stolen money with me?
235
00:10:50,417 --> 00:10:53,184
No. You can leave it
and the sarcasm at home.
236
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:54,786
Just...
237
00:10:54,788 --> 00:10:57,122
tell the judge how
I've turned my life around
238
00:10:57,124 --> 00:10:59,090
and that I'm a fine,
upstanding citizen.
239
00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:00,525
Got it.
240
00:11:00,527 --> 00:11:02,093
Thank you.
241
00:11:02,095 --> 00:11:03,161
You're a good friend.
242
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:04,529
See you tomorrow.
243
00:11:04,531 --> 00:11:06,097
Regina, wait.
244
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:07,332
(sighs)
245
00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:09,334
If I had a real emergency,
246
00:11:09,336 --> 00:11:11,336
do you think I could...
247
00:11:11,338 --> 00:11:13,872
you know... dip into it?
248
00:11:13,874 --> 00:11:15,740
Define "real emergency."
249
00:11:17,043 --> 00:11:20,111
I don't know,
my kid needs an operation...
250
00:11:20,113 --> 00:11:23,715
'cause his mom doesn't have...
251
00:11:23,717 --> 00:11:25,383
satellite TV.
252
00:11:27,787 --> 00:11:30,188
Just give me
the big eyes tomorrow,
253
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:37,996
I'll get you HBO.
254
00:11:37,998 --> 00:11:40,065
¶
255
00:11:40,466 --> 00:11:43,201
Hello, Christy.
256
00:11:45,071 --> 00:11:47,405
Oh, no. No, no, no. No, no.
No, no, no, no,
257
00:11:47,407 --> 00:11:49,541
no, no...
Get back here!
258
00:11:49,543 --> 00:11:51,810
CHRISTY:
I don't have time
for an intervention!
259
00:11:51,812 --> 00:11:53,378
Get!
260
00:11:56,415 --> 00:11:59,284
I'm only coming back
'cause it's my house.
261
00:12:00,019 --> 00:12:01,319
Sit.
262
00:12:03,255 --> 00:12:04,923
What are you doing here?
263
00:12:04,925 --> 00:12:06,591
I'm concerned about you.
264
00:12:06,593 --> 00:12:08,293
(mocking):
I'm concerned about you.
265
00:12:11,063 --> 00:12:12,764
Before we begin...
266
00:12:12,766 --> 00:12:15,200
it's important you
know we love you
and we just want
267
00:12:15,202 --> 00:12:18,169
to talk to
you about...
I am so pissed at you!
268
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:21,206
Apparently, Violet
is going first.
269
00:12:21,208 --> 00:12:23,241
I spent too many years
making sure you ate,
270
00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:25,877
putting you to bed,
and cleaning vomit off of you.
271
00:12:25,879 --> 00:12:28,246
I am not going
through it again.
272
00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:32,617
You do realize
you're having a baby, right?
273
00:12:32,619 --> 00:12:35,920
Christy, you're lying
about where you are,
274
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,055
you're calling in
sick to work,
275
00:12:37,057 --> 00:12:39,891
and now Gabriel says
you're buying pot?
276
00:12:39,893 --> 00:12:42,060
I saw you go in the walk-in
with Rudy.
277
00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:43,928
You ratted me out to my mother?
278
00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:46,131
What is this, fourth grade?
I am fine!
279
00:12:46,133 --> 00:12:47,132
You're buying drugs.
280
00:12:47,134 --> 00:12:48,366
For my boyfriend!
281
00:12:48,368 --> 00:12:50,702
Okay, so it's
eighth grade.
282
00:12:50,704 --> 00:12:53,138
How long before you start
buying them for yourself?
283
00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:54,706
I know what I'm doing.
284
00:12:54,708 --> 00:12:56,407
Says the woman
who slept with her
285
00:12:56,409 --> 00:12:59,210
married boss.
286
00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:03,214
Let's not lose focus.
This is about the weed.
287
00:13:04,216 --> 00:13:05,984
Christy...
288
00:13:05,986 --> 00:13:09,420
this David's just gonna
drag you down with him.
289
00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:11,756
I see what's going on here.
290
00:13:11,758 --> 00:13:15,059
David and I are happy,
and you guys can't handle it.
291
00:13:15,061 --> 00:13:16,127
Don't be
ridiculous.
292
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,263
Why don't you take
all of this "concern"
293
00:13:18,265 --> 00:13:20,231
and fix your own damn lives?!
294
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:21,566
Are you happy?
295
00:13:21,568 --> 00:13:23,101
Are you happy?
296
00:13:23,103 --> 00:13:24,903
I know you're not happy.
297
00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:28,139
I'm happy...
298
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,440
ish.
299
00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:32,243
I'm out of here.
Christy, wait.
300
00:13:32,245 --> 00:13:33,578
Nope.
301
00:13:33,580 --> 00:13:37,649
And just for the record, this is
the crappiest intervention
302
00:13:37,651 --> 00:13:39,651
anyone's ever thrown me!
303
00:13:40,619 --> 00:13:42,887
And I've had a few!
304
00:13:44,190 --> 00:13:46,257
¶
305
00:13:50,095 --> 00:13:52,263
(electronic tone dings)
306
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,367
Oh, you've got to be kidding me!
307
00:13:57,203 --> 00:13:58,670
Whoops.
308
00:13:58,672 --> 00:14:00,305
Who's she?
309
00:14:00,307 --> 00:14:02,106
Um...
310
00:14:02,108 --> 00:14:03,775
Alicia.
Alicia.
311
00:14:04,877 --> 00:14:06,978
Maybe I should... go.
312
00:14:06,980 --> 00:14:08,680
Yeah, maybe you should go.
313
00:14:08,682 --> 00:14:10,815
It was nice
meeting you.
314
00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:11,950
Mm-hmm.
315
00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:13,284
I can't believe you!
316
00:14:13,286 --> 00:14:15,687
Okay, let's stay calm and talk.
317
00:14:15,689 --> 00:14:17,055
What's there to talk about?
318
00:14:17,057 --> 00:14:19,123
You got your tongue
in some slut's mouth!
319
00:14:19,892 --> 00:14:21,759
Just waiting for the elevator.
320
00:14:22,895 --> 00:14:24,596
Let's go inside.
321
00:14:32,238 --> 00:14:34,739
You rat bastard!
322
00:14:34,741 --> 00:14:36,574
You said you loved me.
323
00:14:36,576 --> 00:14:40,211
I said I was fallingin love with you.
324
00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:43,648
And in my defense,
I was very high.
325
00:14:45,651 --> 00:14:49,053
Well, I was falling in love
with you...
326
00:14:49,055 --> 00:14:51,823
and I was stone-cold sober.
327
00:14:52,825 --> 00:14:54,192
You're right.
328
00:14:54,194 --> 00:14:55,426
I'm sorry.
329
00:14:55,428 --> 00:14:58,496
The truth is, Christy,
the reason I kissed that woman
330
00:14:58,498 --> 00:15:00,999
is because...
331
00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:03,067
I love you so much.
332
00:15:05,871 --> 00:15:07,405
Wow.
333
00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:10,842
That's so bad,
it's almost good.
334
00:15:10,844 --> 00:15:13,845
My feelings for you are
so intense that it scares me.
335
00:15:13,847 --> 00:15:14,946
Scares you?
336
00:15:14,948 --> 00:15:18,182
I put you in front
of my family and my job!
337
00:15:18,184 --> 00:15:19,951
I even bought pot for you.
338
00:15:19,953 --> 00:15:21,352
Really? Did you bring it?
339
00:15:23,455 --> 00:15:25,256
Here you go.
340
00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:27,258
Choke on it!
341
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:28,760
(door opens)
342
00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:32,630
Oh, for God's sakes,
take the stairs.
343
00:15:33,699 --> 00:15:35,533
¶
344
00:15:40,406 --> 00:15:43,474
Where the hell is my
big-eyed character witness?
345
00:15:44,743 --> 00:15:47,679
My guess? Unspooling
a fireman's hose.
346
00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:50,281
What?
347
00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:52,784
She's banging
a fireman.
348
00:15:52,786 --> 00:15:55,887
I am going away
for a long time.
349
00:15:55,889 --> 00:15:57,288
You know...
350
00:15:57,290 --> 00:16:00,058
it's not too
late to run.
351
00:16:00,060 --> 00:16:01,626
You think?
352
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:02,994
(door opens)
353
00:16:02,996 --> 00:16:05,430
Regina, I can't
delay this anymore.
354
00:16:05,432 --> 00:16:07,565
Now it's too
late to run.
355
00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:09,100
Oh, dear God,
356
00:16:09,102 --> 00:16:11,135
I prayed it wouldn't
come to this.
357
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:12,537
But...
358
00:16:13,272 --> 00:16:15,139
Sketchy...
359
00:16:15,141 --> 00:16:17,508
will you be
my character witness?
360
00:16:19,511 --> 00:16:21,579
I would be honored.
361
00:16:22,448 --> 00:16:25,416
The judge a guy
or a girl?
362
00:16:25,418 --> 00:16:26,417
Guy.
363
00:16:27,419 --> 00:16:28,886
I got this.
364
00:16:32,925 --> 00:16:35,460
Your Honor, I'm not
gonna candy-coat it.
365
00:16:35,462 --> 00:16:39,397
I've done bad things in my life.
366
00:16:43,435 --> 00:16:47,438
I've bought drugs, sold drugs,
a little gun smuggling,
367
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,375
might have dabbled
in some human trafficking.
368
00:16:50,377 --> 00:16:53,611
But that doesn't mean
I'm not a good person today.
369
00:16:53,613 --> 00:16:58,149
(quietly): Doesn't mean she's a
good character witness, either.
370
00:16:58,151 --> 00:16:59,951
I've sat where Regina
Thompkins is sitting.
371
00:16:59,953 --> 00:17:02,220
I know the regret
she's feeling,
372
00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:05,323
the shame, because
she hurt innocent people.
373
00:17:05,325 --> 00:17:06,824
Yes, you did, Regina.
374
00:17:06,826 --> 00:17:10,228
You hurt them.
Don't look away.
375
00:17:12,164 --> 00:17:14,832
But what are we here for,
Your Honor...
376
00:17:14,834 --> 00:17:17,568
punishment or redemption?
377
00:17:19,505 --> 00:17:22,040
Okay, I'll
say it for you.
378
00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:24,509
Redemption.
379
00:17:24,511 --> 00:17:27,812
Which is why I recommend
release with probation,
380
00:17:27,814 --> 00:17:30,314
so Regina can find
honest employment
381
00:17:30,316 --> 00:17:32,850
and pay back
the money she stole.
382
00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:36,421
You do realize we're
talking about $3 million.
383
00:17:36,423 --> 00:17:39,190
Well, they may
not get it tomorrow...
384
00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:41,392
but doesn't she
deserve a chance?
385
00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:43,027
I don't think so.
386
00:17:43,029 --> 00:17:44,429
Wow.
387
00:17:44,431 --> 00:17:47,498
So you're just gonna be
a douche about this.
388
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:49,067
I'm here, I'm here. Sorry.
389
00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:51,436
Oh, thank God!
Get your skinny
ass up there!
390
00:17:52,538 --> 00:17:54,539
Tough crowd.
391
00:17:54,541 --> 00:17:56,674
Hi. Sorry I'm late.
392
00:17:56,676 --> 00:17:58,676
Today has been
a total nightmare.
393
00:17:58,678 --> 00:18:00,711
Do I need to, uh,
touch a Bible
394
00:18:00,713 --> 00:18:02,947
or say the Pledge
of Allegiance or something?
395
00:18:02,949 --> 00:18:04,582
No, no, just
state your name
396
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,584
and tell us about
the defendant.
397
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:08,786
Oh, okay. Uh...
398
00:18:08,788 --> 00:18:10,788
Christy Plunkett.
399
00:18:10,790 --> 00:18:15,426
I'm... here to speak
on behalf of Regina Thompkins.
400
00:18:16,462 --> 00:18:18,429
Whew! Where to start?
401
00:18:18,431 --> 00:18:20,631
I mean... I love her.
402
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:23,267
She's a wonderful
person.
403
00:18:23,269 --> 00:18:25,570
Sure, she's made some mistakes,
404
00:18:25,572 --> 00:18:28,272
but she's really turned
her life around.
405
00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:30,708
She's been sober
for six months, and...
406
00:18:30,710 --> 00:18:32,877
let me tell you, that
is not an easy thing to do.
407
00:18:32,879 --> 00:18:34,879
Because...
408
00:18:34,881 --> 00:18:36,814
when you get sober, you...
409
00:18:36,816 --> 00:18:39,117
think the fun's over.
410
00:18:40,085 --> 00:18:42,487
Unless you get lucky
and meet a guy
411
00:18:42,489 --> 00:18:44,088
who actually
makes you feel good,
412
00:18:44,090 --> 00:18:46,624
and then you think,
"All right, I'm back!"
413
00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:49,527
But you're not.
414
00:18:51,563 --> 00:18:53,631
(sniffles)
415
00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:55,733
(crying):
Because...
416
00:18:55,735 --> 00:18:58,402
you open your heart up...
417
00:18:58,404 --> 00:19:01,439
to this jerk...
(sniffles)
418
00:19:01,441 --> 00:19:04,942
and he turns out to be a big,
419
00:19:04,944 --> 00:19:08,579
drunken, cheating idiot.
420
00:19:08,581 --> 00:19:11,082
Yeah, the sex was
great, Your Honor.
421
00:19:11,084 --> 00:19:12,617
But how am I supposed
422
00:19:12,619 --> 00:19:14,318
to forgive him?
423
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,787
Once a liar,
always a liar!
424
00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:19,090
A leopard cannot change its spots.
425
00:19:22,461 --> 00:19:24,529
Unless, of course,
426
00:19:24,531 --> 00:19:26,664
the leopard is
Regina Thompkins.
427
00:19:36,542 --> 00:19:40,011
Is it too late to give back
some of that money?
428
00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:45,950
I'm so sorry
about the way I acted.
429
00:19:45,952 --> 00:19:47,552
I just thought...
430
00:19:47,554 --> 00:19:49,554
David and I
really had something.
431
00:19:49,556 --> 00:19:51,522
I know, baby.
432
00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:54,392
I'm so sorry you had
to go through that.
433
00:19:55,360 --> 00:19:56,494
Hello?
434
00:19:56,496 --> 00:19:58,696
Anybody sorry I'm going
to jail for four years?
435
00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:00,731
Aw, with good behavior,
you'll be out in two.
436
00:20:00,733 --> 00:20:02,733
You could do two years
standing on your head.
437
00:20:02,735 --> 00:20:04,869
Or sitting on someone else's.
438
00:20:04,871 --> 00:20:07,505
Here's what you do--
first day in there,
439
00:20:07,507 --> 00:20:09,707
you find the biggest badass
in the yard,
440
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:11,375
hit her with
a sock full of nickels
441
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:14,178
and show everybody there's
a new queen bitch in town.
442
00:20:14,180 --> 00:20:15,980
But doesn't that mean
sooner or later
443
00:20:15,982 --> 00:20:18,149
someone's gonna whack
the crap out of me?
444
00:20:18,151 --> 00:20:21,118
Well, uneasy lies the head
that wears the crown.
445
00:20:22,254 --> 00:20:23,688
(big sigh)
446
00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:25,556
Anybody else feel
like hitting a meeting?
447
00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:27,725
Sounds good to me.
448
00:20:29,761 --> 00:20:31,896
Don't worry, Regina, your box
of money is safe with me.
449
00:20:31,898 --> 00:20:34,966
BONNIE:
There's a box of money?
CHRISTY: No.
35458
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