Original subtitles

this is the official two minute warning

a nuclear strike is imminent on Melbourne

you have two minutes

so that was the end of the world

was it now what do I do

what are you looking at dead shit

where's your fucking food mate

fuckin'rip off yeah

suck lead you mother's

oh shit city down here mate

all we've got

it's a can of lychees

and some tomato soup not bloody lychees

yeah but tomato soup mate

that's tomato soup

what about a fucking can opener

huh Hughie

yeah we'll find one alright

ha ha

woo hoo

nothing

nothing

piles of shit

nothing but great steam and sloppy piles wait a minute

right I've got a bomb shelter at 2:00 now

how about some backup this time Louie

alright Jesus

we could have that punter bugger boy of balls yesterday

if you had to get your shit together

Christ now

just stop playing with it

alright and get ready

now get ready

here it comes

and

and now powabunga

we're coming to get you

Wuhu

alright you bastards

open up this hatch or I'll blow it off its hinges

ugh

we're not joking George open up this hatch

alright dead shit

you got five seconds and I'll blow this thing up

foot square five four three

I said three turkeys

three two one

alright that's it

hey guys

I thought I heard something

how you going come on in

come on there's plenty of room for everyone

yeah it's just an informal gathering we've got here

few close friends few drinks

that sort of thing

some of the boys have got a little combo together

little light dance music nothing too raucous

or maybe you just want to take it easy

put your feet up here shake the shit out of your coats

and hang them over here

this is a casual affair sort of come as you are

smoke'em if you got'em you know the story

oh by the way

no one's got AIDS have they

it's just a precaution

whoa you boys are really hot stuff

fact your

pardon the expression you're a bit cooked

perhaps we should move into the main room straight away

it's a lot more convivial

oh

here here's your complimentary Polaroid

it's a little fog but that's full out for you

shall we

wow because I'm so

well here we are

I think you'll enjoy our live entertainment

well stocked bars to your left

and if it's food that you're after

we have whoo

gangway hahaha

now I think you'd be more interested in some first aid

why don't you come see Jenny over here

5 minutes with her you'll feel no pain

John John

John somebody has ripped down all my decorations

from the back wall

you have to tell people they cannot touch it

look at this where are the streamers

I found this was on the floor what is going on

I

just want

to thank you

all for getting me to 500

I was running high but now I'm running low

my brain's telling me to

slow down

I'm so down yeah

I'm so down but I'm not out

okay thank you

thank you thank you very much

now we can't play give me your shoulder again

we've done that a couple of times

um okay

we've had news of a couple of new arrivals up the back

I would like to have a big round of applause

for the new arrivals thank you

yeah yeah yeah

okay

alright the next song's for real

atomic toe tapers so you know

get off your drunken bums and dance come on

hey mate

hey what's the poop on this party here mate

hey what party

nah fair dinkum

the party what's the story with the party here

oh there's no party here mate

I think you must be in a state of shock

no one would throw a party

in the middle of a nuclear war

doesn't make any sense

must be some kind of hallucination

to protect your brain from reality or something

look smart ass

just don't dick me around alright

just tell me what the fuck is going on

oh shit

I know we're just having a good time

yeah but why

come on who's behind it all

what's the catch look

I'm a bit stoned mate

why don't you ask someone else

and what have we here the ablutions block all right

and inside a whole world of equipment

all right

excuse me Mister Baxter

Johnny Boy my main man

what's happening alright

hey try this on for size

hey just what I need

rubber lingerie

alright

hey did you uh

sort out those bastards who smashed our Periscope

yeah well

sort of I invited them in

you invited them in what happened to no gate crashes

invitation only no

come on mate I couldn't leave them outside

the ring leader's a bit of a dick

but they're harmless enough

fuck John

there's no more room

I'm starting to run out of piss already

come on 3 more won't make any difference

look

the poor bastards are cooked to the shit house anyway

they'll probably only last a couple more hours

a person can consume a lot of alcohol

in a couple of hours John

I should know

say die

how you going there

oh nothing a good telephone wouldn't fix

you like lychee do you Louie

hmm no

no it's just no one else does

what's your favourite fruit then

bananas I think a days are numbered Louie

every lychee you eat is one banana

you'll never have time for

alright

see that the rice too

oh God that's good you can have it

asses blues yellows morphine

methadone barbiturates marijuana

t p c p miscaline valium or serapax

nah I want something with a bit of kick

haven't you got any crack or some speed

you for 2 days this party's

been going

would we be smoking bong if there was any coke left huh

yeah right

there is some smack though

oh no

that's just for dickheads

I wanna get wired not hooked

yes you could easily be addicted for life

well obviously

you're ready for the big time Hugh

so I suggest that you try our Bong and Bang cocktail

do you agree

yeah I'll try anything once

hey hey

hey hey

hey hey

hey hey

oh oh

Jake from Jake from oh

Jake from Jake from

huh

huh huh

huh huh

huh huh

huh huh

huh huh

here you're pretty good at this

do you want to try out on slow roast

I have just a few things to say

I will not be long I have been waiting for a while

to see if things would get better

but no but no

it was not an accident it was deliberate

people have been tearing down my decorations

from the back wall what

what do you think this is

this is meant to be a set of lashes

but you're running around like animals

if any of you have been to my

to my reconnaissance exhibition gallery

you would not what

stop that noise I'm done

I know you tape up ribs

but don't we need a cast or something for this

yes well normally

well haven't you got any plaster

no there's plenty

well

look Chloe

you've been upstairs all this time right

and I don't really know how to tell you this

but you probably only got a few hours left before

anyway a jawbone takes about 3 weeks to knit properly

and a plaster cast would take half an hour to set

so what would you rather do for half an hour

have a drink

dance

eat some bananas

sit around and wait for a cast to dry

that old black magic oh no

no no

don't open the door wait

wait wait a moment please

okay what is it

no me

Umbrella Ballet not again

can't you see I am busy

you were wondering if you listen

no I'm filming a tank

I am still developing

why can't you go to the other room

what is this it's taken

oh come on

Pasquale

who gave you all that plaster of Paris for modelling eh

now Fair's fair

if I let you do this

you will have to rinse out my film in 10 minutes okay

yes yes okay

otherwise it will go crazy

yeah we'll take care of it now hurry up

oh

left foot yellow

right hand red

you've really fucked this up Crawley

it's just too many people here

it's turning to shit right before our eyes

left foot yellow yeah OK

OK piss off

will you Mick

I'm busy you've taken a good idea

and you've made a complete abortion out of it

what if there was a fire left hand red yeah OK

OK I'll have a think about it

alright now leave me alone

it's not just the ringings

you invited too many people here in the first place

it's fucking madness we've gotta thin it down a bit

look man I love you like a brother

but if you don't behave yourself

I'm gonna tie you to the dunny until you sober up

alright

yeah you just fucking try it pal

especially if you're a dancer for pleasure

uh

okay we're gonna have a uh

just a short pause uh

Liz is gonna change the string

and then we'll get on with the next song

I've just heard um

sorry Lizzie hasn't got any more strings

but we're gonna keep playing anyway

fill her up Alexi

what do you want Mac

the usual good shot

I'll survive yeah

it's a pretty lively night

what do you think yourself

oh yes these things are sent to test us

I got a one of the size

tell me this one about 2 + 1

about 2 black eyes see if I need a water

if I gonna slap your face baby

let me tell you that there is no price

are you on the pill

that's a bit of a poorly thought out question Louie

old family recipe

here you go mate

oh it's a bleeding your pencil

I don't believe we've met

you wouldn't be one of those nasty

unwelcome gate crashers would you

I'll take it you have your invitation with you

have you not

ah ah ah

I mean

that is the problem with Moderna New Expressionism

photo photorealism what does it all mean

nothing

wankers that don't know what they're talking about

themselves

you think they know what they're talking about

of course they do not know they don't give a stuff

I mean

the the airbrushes are just sterile weapons I mean

look at this

it's totally organic it gives me a gut reaction I mean

it just hits me in the right spot and it stirs inside

inside my stomach it evokes some sort of emotion

it kind of it moves me it unfolds so much

it just it just reaches me and like a river

it keeps on moving

and it just spills out all over the canvas

it's real it

it tells me something about yourself about your life

I really like what you're doing

mission where is it

ladies and gentlemen

ladies and gentlemen

this is your captain speaking

I have just examined our guide account and as of now

we are all officially cooked

so this is it folks I can't afford to slack off now

we got a year's worth of food in this shelter

and we got about a day or so to get through it all in

so what are we gonna do

take it easy and conserve our strength

or are we gonna run ourselves ragged

alright then let's downhill all the way now

let's get the ball rolling do you hear me

alright this is it yeah

we're in the home stretch

we're on our way now okay are you ready

are you ready

okay then let's go

I'm gonna smile

I'll do everything I can for you

don't worry

you won't be in any pain I don't care about that

why the fuck me

why me

what would it be say

oh Louie

try not to think about it

don't you see

I'm scared

Jumping Black

Jump jump jumping black

we got the Black Widow

hey hey

help

help I'm stuck outside

hey God help help

come on guys

it's Hughie let me in

gonna get my cat

gonna eat my dog

I'm gonna bump and grind

I'm gonna lick my loop

chop and block

chop chop chop and block

chop chop

chop and block well

oh good day Mick

hey can I borrow your camcorder my sink is rooted

let me in guys

come on

let me in

Hewie baby

what are you claustrophobic or something

come in out of the heat

yeah I uh

asked Mick to let you back in but he's a bit tied up

hands

someone's having a bit of trouble over there

can we have someone look after him

you know

hands yeah look

can someone get a doctor over there

OK you guys

let's get this over with

Cameron you grab his legs

oh oh

oh

hey uh

relax this squally can you get the generator ready now

I think there's some candles on it

this squally

can you get the generator ready now

Jennifer

Jennifer

I'm sorry

uh we have a problem

we have blown a fuse

Jennifer

he died

um you better come see Mick I think he's in trouble

no you can't be cooked

you didn't catch anything in the blast

look mate

hang on I'll get Jenny for you

she'll have something that'll help

no it's alright mate

it's just all warm booze catches up with you

you haven't got a brocker on you have you

shut up are you oh my God

can you hear that

oh my God

here's the whole world falling down on our heads

oh you like a song

you like a song you like a song song

you wanna dance too you wanna get up on the table

do you really Freddy come

I don't know what to do oh my God

greetings earth brothers

anyone want to come to a party

let's go you're all mad

you smashed through the wall of a bomb shelter

like it was nothing at all

you ransacked the whole place

you're out of your mind and look at all the waste

for God's sake

we've been trying to survive on a can of baked beans

a day and you're having an orgy

what the bloody hell are you doing

celebrating the end of the world

I'm not gonna argue with you

there's no argument involved son

I'm telling you straight out

I won't have your sick weirdos in my place

and I won't have my boy in here

you can go to hell if you want to

but we're gonna survive wake up mate

take a look at a Geiger counter

why don't you no one's gonna survive

we got so many reds coming through the walls

it's lucky we don't glow in the dark

if you're gonna rebuild humanity from the ashes

then you better fucking get on to it

there's 24 hours from now

it'll all be over get it

listen ass

if anyone's gonna survive

it's gonna be me and my family because we deserve to

and even if we really are gonna die

then I want to have my family all together with me

to die in peace and with dignity

which is something you wouldn't know about dignity

I'll show you fucking dignity you punk ass old bastard

fucking party pooper

oh we shouldn't have done that

Ted's probably gonna get the gun now

oh that sounds exciting

no not really it's only a 45

alright you little bastard

get your stinking mates out of my bomb shelter

or I'll blow your fucking head off your shoulders

do you hear me in 10 minutes

I want my place put back exactly how it was now

tell them to get things going

come on son

I'm not joking

so help me I'll blow your brains across the back wall

if you don't hurry up get them out of my place now

look mate

why don't you put it away

I got nothing to lose

drop the piece and enjoy the party

come on you know you want to

I'm warning you I'm not afraid to use this

now don't be a fool

tell them this really is all a bit silly

you know that don't you

why don't we sit down and discuss this like gentlemen

man to man you've had your warning

I'll give you a count of three

and I'll blow your brains out

look you don't have to do this

I'm offering you pretzels and cold beer

one

2

come on

blow my mind

3

what what the bloody

what do you think you're doing

you miserable you think you're my nigga

get your filthy balls off me

come on man

you stupid prick get your boyfriend

what are you doing what are you doing

John be reasonable John

I'm gonna fucking kill you

my baby went out

wow my baby went out

and I'm sad my baby went out

Nick

Nick

what were you doing

sitting outside watching an Adam Bomb

no look

he can't hear you he's blind

you mean deaf yeah

but he's your drummer yeah

he needs loud fallback you have to yell

listen Nick

you can't do anymore drumming

do you understand

oh that's a little rough

isn't it DOC

Nick radiation kills through physical exhaustion

if you keep drumming you'll be dead in an hour

if you take it easy who knows

you could outlive us all what

this one is titled The Furnace

everything was hot intense burning

isn't it obvious I was rebelling then can't you see

this one I use the praying mantis as a metaphor

for the relationship I had with my mother

it was a very intense time

on what date did the first episode of Batman go to air

in Australia I don't know dear

why do you call yourselves a spunks

OK folks um

this is gonna have to be the last song for the night

thanks a lot for coming oh man

yeah I think you should all maybe uh

think about getting up and having a dance

cause this is gonna be the last one for the evening

we can't make it to any more stuff

and I know you guys are all pretty stuffed too

but make a bit of a last effort

thanks for coming and we'll see you later

just one more choke on that dope cigarette

one more swig from my bottle of wine

give me one more kiss'cause I'm feeling quite out of it

don't think I hold on

give me one more round

I'll hold Langton and crawl to the fridge

for one last bite

I'll button your blue dress

put the music up loud come closer

but tomorrow ain't gonna come

and to go out with a friend so this kiss is gonna be

come on this is stupid

she's just sitting there all by herself

she won't bite go on make your move

what are you afraid of of course she'll dance with you

why wouldn't she

it's not like she's with someone else or anything

just go over and ask her

well I'm not interested huh

well that's just typical shit

you're not so bloody hot yourself

you bitch what's the matter

it's the end of the world

for God's sake I can't be that bad

well

I don't know maybe I am

this night's gonna last a long

long time come on

be positive what can I say to her

hi wanna dance

oh shit she's not gonna buy that

look time's running out

get your act together yeah

alright okay

I'll just have one more smoke and I'll do it

oh my God I just smoked the last cigarette on Earth

and you ride around and you know that

alright I've got no more excuses

I gotta stand up go over yeah

no I can't

come on you've gotta do it

no she'll laugh at me now

calm down look

you can't put it off any longer

you gotta get up out of your seat right now

take it with you and you can't take it with you

alright this is it

on the count of 3 1

2

3

4 oh for fuck's sake

I don't know what to

do

may I have the pleasure of this dance

you've got to be fucking kidding

I have the pleasure of this dance

come here mate

no me neither

great band aye

I'm not much of a dancer either

oh come on

come on

come on

come on dance dance

come on hey hey

what the fuck are you doing get away from me

get away from me I'll kill the fucking Lydia

stop it

shut up shut up and drop the bloody knife

we can't stay here all night

just drop the knife

come on

come on

come on

all right

this is really fucking up

yeah

listen

I've been thinking about maybe pissing off

what do you reckon

yeah

I'll go and get my tapes

why don't you see if you can find Jenny

I'll meet you next door

well here we are

we're enjoying our lunch

and if it's easy you're off the window

all of the time

thank you very much thank you

I belong to it

it's just the radiation eating the tape mate

it's hotter than hell in here

I think

we should seriously consider getting out of here

this isn't the sort of place I wanna die in

bit of a downer aye

I guess the party's over alright yep

well I'm gonna get out of here anyone coming outside

you go ahead

I'm gonna see if I can do anything for these people

I'll probably come up later

you're beautiful Jenny

thanks

그러냐

hey look at this

good old Elwood

yeah you go away for a few days and you

can hardly recognize the place

well

what a party yep

well

I don't think

I've got too many regrets about the things I've done

nah

I would have liked to have gone to Portugal though

that would have been nice

no need mate

it look the same as this nowadays

yeah I suppose so

do you think Jenny will come up

I think she'll take something

hey

we got company look here check it out

wow it's a mop up strike or something

looks like we got a bit less time than I thought

yeah

about a minute I'd say this is really it

yep

I'm glad I knew you Mick

I can't think of anyone

I'd rather have gone through the apocalypse with mate

good on you man

I love you mate

same here

it's been great really great it sure has

so this is it

the big meltdown yeah

and no hangover tomorrow

yeah come on mate

here it comes

I don't suppose

it's everyone who gets to see something like this aye

yeah any second now

it's gonna be bright like in the films

here she goes yeah here it goes

hey bye Mick

see you later mate

there's a black cat that's strolling across my way

I'm not out I'm in rags

hey I'm dressed in rags

and these ones are from the rack

from some kids in the falls I ain't gonna go to the

everyday everyday I get the

I think of things I think of things to say to you

if I should see you down

every day I get the blues I get the blues

if I should see you down the street

well I'm cursed I'm so cursed

strolling across my way

it looks like my troubles are here to stay

when I'm down

I'm not bothered

but I since discovered that they hate to cry

when I'm down