Original subtitles

[music]

-Okay, and this is a... -A bishop.

-That's a bishop. -Oh, right, right, right.

-How much is a bishop? -A bishop is three.

Three, okay. And a queen is nine?

-[Reginald] Yes, sir. -Okay.

-And how much is a king? -Well, a king is infinite.

Infinite?

Then how are we supposed to add that up at the end of the game?

Well, you don't really add them up.

[Lindor] Then what are the points for?

Well, the points are just to give you an idea of the value

of the piece to help you inform you of a strategy,

when to exchange,

when to capture, that kind of thing.

[doorbell rings]

Whew. Hey.

-Hey, guys, how y'all doing? -[Reginald] Hey, Ms. Cora.

[Lindor] Hey.

Who the hell's in the bathroom?

I gotta go.

Oh, I don't know.

I tried to get in there earlier.

Well, they need to hurry up.

I got to go bad.

Why is it you can't go to your own restroom in your room?

I'm not gonna blow up my own restroom.

-Really? -Well, why not?

Oh, so you're gonna blow up the bathroom in the hallway

-and punish all of us? -Damn right.

Oh, Vinny.

Oh, I swear you're a Neanderthal.

Yes, you can go...

Go use your own restroom, Vinny!

I tell you what, I'm gonna use the restroom in the east wing.

That's where I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go to that one.

Oh, no, you won't.

That is by my room, you elephant.

Did he just call me elephant?

[Cora laughs] He did.

[chuckling] Who the hell calls somebody elephant?

I could've called you much worse.

Is that how y'all do name calling in Africa?

Okay, you wanna do animals? You wanna do animals?

-All right, you pigeon neck! -Oh, you hippopotamus!

[Vinny] Oh, you is chicken butt!

You have a mouth like an alligator.

You moose, moose behind.

[Efe] That--

-[Vinny] Dog head! -Okay.

Okay, guys.

Not you, Ms. Cora.

-I wouldn't call you a frog. -Okay, okay.

I'm talking about him.

[Cora] Well, Efe, I'm s--

Oh, Efe, I don't know what we gonna do with him.

-Oh, here's your package. -Ooh.

Hey!

This is from my daughter.

[chuckling]

That girl. She's always full of surprises.

Aww, that's so nice.

So you got something special coming up?

No, no, she just...

she always sends me these little care packages

just to, um...

just to let me know she's thinking of me.

Oh, that is so sweet.

That's because you're a good father.

Ah, thank you, Ms. Cora.

-Hey, hey, excuse me. -There's mail?

-Yes, yes. -Anything from my son?

I've written him a few times.

Uh, no, not in this batch.

-Maybe it'll come tomorrow. -Hmm, wishful thinking.

Yeah. [chuckles dryly]

I guess he hasn't given up his hardened grudge against me.

Oh, well, you know how these young people are.

You know, he writes you all the time.

He'll come around.

He's not a young'un anymore, Ms. Cora.

He's a grown man with a career, and a family,

one I've never met, I might add.

Oh, so you have grandchildren.

Yes, a grandson.

And you've never met him?

Yeah, yeah. No, I've never met him.

Uh.

Hence, no family.

Thus, no mail.

[Vinny] Listen up, everybody.

-[Cora] You're all right? -I'm fine.

The restroom in the East Wing is completely out of order.

Vinny!

Permanently.

And you're gonna need a plumber and some air freshener.

-[Cora] Oh, come on. -Candles.

-[Cora] Come on. -[Vinny] Maybe a exorcist.

[Cora] That is terrible. You could use your own restroom.

[music]

[clears throat]

So, um, uh...

? No matter what you do ?

? I love you ?

? No matter where you go ?

? I'm behind you for sure ?

? Always remember ?

? Blood ain't never water ?

? We'll make it if we stay together ?

[upbeat music]

I'm sorry to hear that, Judge Junie.

No, but you do have a family.

You do. Lindor is right.

You have all of us.

That's very kind of you.

Yeah. And you're stuck with us.

Isn't it interesting how one argument can change

the trajectory of two people forever?

Yeah, but time can heal all wounds, Judge Junie.

Maybe not so much for a Scorpio, Ms. Cora.

Oh, your son's a Scorpio?

-He is. -[Lindor] Yeah.

My dad's a Scorpio. They stay mad forever.

-Really? -[Lindor] Yep.

Yes. Yes, they can.

So is life.

Are you forgetting something, Judge Junie?

What? My car keys?

Your car keys? You drive, Judge Junie?

He, he abs... No, he does not.

No, you're right. I don't.

You're right.

So, what am I forgetting?

You were just teaching me how to play chess, remember?

Oh, you wanna learn to play chess?

Sure. Sure, I'll teach you.

Someday.

What just happened?

Yo, you old people are crazy.

Lindor, you hush, boy.

You gonna get old one day if you lucky.

Touch�.

But you know what? I think it's really nice of you

to spend time with Judge Junie.

Yeah, no, I like Judge Junie.

You know, his mind is kind of slipping a little bit.

Yeah. No, I noticed that recently.

But you playing chess with him and taking time,

that's gonna help his mind and help him.

Yeah.

I just hate that he's always so sad all the time, you know?

He's just lonely, that's all.

Yeah, no, I feel that. I get lonely myself.

Yeah, we all do.

But working around here, one thing I've learned is

there's no pill that can make an older person feel better

than somebody spending time with 'em

and just checking on 'em.

You know, we should do something for him.

You know what? We should.

We should just do...

You know what?

That's a good idea. We should do something tomorrow.

-Tomorrow? -Yes, tomorrow.

I got an idea. I got an idea.

Something just came up. You know what?

But I gotta go get started on it.

-You gonna help me with it? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay, so why you still sitting there?

Oh, all right.

We don't have a lot of time.

[Philip sighing]

Man.

I thought they'd never leave.

Yeah, I wasn't expecting to be stuck

in a bathroom with you.

Look, I'm sorry,

but if my people caught us, they would kill me.

Mm, it's all good.

It was fun.

[Megan giggling]

-It was fun. -[Megan] Yeah.

-[Leah and Jeremy laughing] -[Leah] I know that's right!

-We, we gotta go. -Okay.

Fix your hair. Fix your hair.

Okay, cool, cool.

[Megan] Okay.

Okay, um, bye...

Big Daddy.

Big Daddy.

Philly Phil!

Get it, boy.

Get it, boy. Get it, boy.

-What are you doing? -What?

What?

Why are you forever sneaking up on somebody?

Well, you're forever sneaking around doing something.

Probably something nasty.

What? That doesn't even sound like me.

Why don't you wanna go back away to college

or something or join a cult or something?

No, I prefer being here to supervise you.

-Creepy. -Who was that?

-Who was who? -No, don't even try it.

-I heard someone. -You heard someone?

Oh, it was me. Me, myself, and I.

I was obviously right here. You saw me right here.

You're not hearing voices?

I swear you get weirder by the day.

Is someone still hogging the whole--

Hell if I know, you weirdo.

What a strange question.

-I'm watching you. -Okay, stalker.

[Philip scoffs]

[music]

You lying.

No, she was with it. She was with it.

-Bro, here? -Shh.

-Are you serious? -Anyone see y'all?

Hell no.

[screaming in excitement]

Oh, you wildin'.

No, it was crazy. I won't lie.

See, I'm just happy you got over Chilecia.

Yeah, man, I'm over that.

See, my boy already moved on.

Yeah, but what was that that you needed?

Uh, your computer skills.

So we're surprising Judge Junie tomorrow.

We just need your help on detective work.

All right, bet. Yeah, let's do it.

Jeremy! Jeremy!

What? What's wrong?

Meet me in this hallway bathroom.

Dude, is that the bathroom that you--

Yeah, it is.

[Leah] Oh my God!

Nah, I'm out. Let's go.

Mm-mm. Nope.

[music]

Damn!

Hey, what did they find?

Hell if I know.

Anybody ask you any questions?

No, we were just in there together.

Come on, man.

Well, look, they found something.

-I know. -And it's just a matter

of time before they trace it back to you.

Well, hopefully they don't.

Look, just don't say anything.

-I got you, bro. -[Philip] Cool, bro.

Say anything about what?

[Philip and Lindor gasping]

Damn, mind your own business. Right?

-Lindor... -Mm.

-Tell me. -Tell you what?

Whatever it is my brother's telling you

not to say anything about.

Nothing. No, it's nothing.

It's nothing.

You're a terrible liar.

Hey, why don't you make somebody else miserable, right?

No, I think I'm having too much fun

figuring out what trouble you've gotten yourself into.

Hey, Lindor, you ready to go?

Oh, thank God. Yeah. Yep.

-I'm ready. -[Sandra] Oh, Miss Cora?

Hey. How are you, sweetheart? Sorry about that.

Uh, someone left this pouch in the bathroom.

Oh, probably Grandpa Vinny.

Mm, no.

This definitely belongs to a woman.

-Well, that's true. -[Philip] I'll take it.

-It's good. -What? Why did you take it?

I said it belongs to a woman.

No, what I was saying is, like,

I'll find out whose pouch that is.

Now, baby, why would you walk around with a pouch like that?

[stammering] Well, I like pouches. That's cool.

You're so weird.

How about you hold on to it, Sandra?

'Cause I'm sure Miss Anastasia or Karen,

they'll come looking for it in a little bit, okay?

-Sure. -All right, you ready to go?

[Lindor] Yeah, yeah.

You gotta get that pouch from her.

-You think your girl left that? -Yeah, I was rushing her and--

Damn!

-You gotta get that pouch. -[Philip] Yeah.

That'll link you to the crime scene.

And then Sandra's going to freak out on you and me

when she finds out you had a girl over.

Yeah, then she's gonna tell my parents.

-And that can't happen. -Yeah.

Because then they gonna freak out on me.

And if they freak out on you, they're gonna freak out on me,

because it's always my fault too, man.

You always get my ass in trouble.

Hey, Lindor, come on, man.

I've been waiting for you. Come on.

-[Lindor] Okay. -[Cora] We got to go.

-[Lindor] Get the pouch. -Okay!

-Get that pouch. -[Philip] Okay!

[Philip sobbing]

Wait, come back. Don't leave me.

[music]

[music]

In my country, we make a soup called ewedu

for birthday parties.

So I made a big pot.

[laughs]

Oh, Efe, that smells heavenly.

It is.

-It is my mother's recipe. -Oh, wonderful.

Leah and I got some gifts for the judge

from me and the kids.

Oh, wonderful. Thank you.

Where do you want the cake?

-Oh, right here. -And the plates?

Over here. Come on. Bring it right here.

This is fine. Thank you so much.

Hot sliders just off the grill.

Wow, Miss Anastasia. I'm impressed.

You impressed? You ain't even had none yet.

Hush, Jeremy.

Listen to your wife.

Be quiet. My sliders are famous.

Hey, bam!

[everyone cheering]

[Brown] What's up?

-Look at you, Mr. Brown. -[Jeremy] Okay.

Y'all like it? This right here,

this is my going to party outfit.

Oh, baby, you show 'em now.

Yeah, I threw back to the 70s,

because, you know, my era back then.

-I see that. -You like that?

Yeah.

I ain't been to a party in so long,

-I'm nervous. -I'd be nervous, too,

with that ugly-ass suit you got on.

Shut up, Vinny. My nerves.

-Ignant. -[Jeremy] Come on, Grandpa.

Be nice, man.

[Brown] Thank you, he already grumpy.

We're here to be celebrating Reginald's birthday, okay?

And take it easy on that booze in the punch.

You said you wanted the judge to have a nice celebration,

-didn't you? -[Jeremy] Yeah.

But I don't want you to do all that.

Well, take your little narrow butt over there and sit down

and let me do my thing.

Don't put that much in--

It's all right.

Okay, look, everybody, all right, we're here now.

Y'all find a place to hide.

Mr. Brown, you hide them bright clothes.

[Brown] Everybody hide!

[Cora] Mr. Brown, especially those bright close

you got going on.

Here they come, here they come.

[indistinct conversation]

[All] Surprise!

[everyone clapping and cheering]

You people...

Happy birthday, Judge Junie.

You people... I don't know what to say.

You about to cry?

Go ahead and cry.

Let it out. Let them tears out.

If you cry, I'mma cry.

Brown, Brown, I swear if you cry,

I'ma chop you in your damn throat.

Vinny, shut up!

Can we just have a peaceful time

-without you-- -Will y'all stop it please?

Stop.

This is the very first...

I've never even had a birthday party in my life.

Well, guess what y'all?

It's party time!

[everyone clapping and cheering]

[Philip] Okay, so who's the DJ?

Your daddy.

Oh, this was a wonderful idea, Miss Cora

to have a party for Judge Junie.

[Vinny] All right.

Happy birthday, Reginald!

[everyone clapping and cheering]

-Oh, Cora! -Yes?

Cora, this punch is making me feel tingly.

Whoo, Cora, it just makes me feel like breaking bad, Cora.

Well, go on and break bad then.

I feel it, I feel it, I feel it.

[everyone cheering]

[Cora] Yeah, yeah, get it, get it, get it.

Get it, get it, get it, get it.

All right.

It's all in hips.

All in hips. All in hips.

[everyone laughing]

Oh, so we really going to party, huh?

[All] Yeah! Yeah!

Mr. Reginald, we are celebrating you,

so we about to turn this motha' out.

Oh, well, don't hurt nobody now.

Okay.

Reginald, I hope those shoes are comfortable.

The best they can do.

[everyone laughs]

[Jeremy] All right, y'all.

Y'all know what time it is. Let's go.

It's party time!

Party!

[music playing]

Oh, oh!

Get it, Judge! Get it, Judge!

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Yes, baby girl! Show us how it go!

Hey!

[cheering]

[Man] Cora! Cora!

[All] Cora! Cora! Cora! Cora! Cora! Cora!

[everyone cheering]

I see you, boo!

[All laughing]

[Brown] I told her. I told her.

Oh!

This is so nice!

What?

Thank you, Philip and Sandra!

Oh! Well, this is...

This is very nice! Um...

Yes, it's lovely! Um...

Mm. It's... Thank you!

You don't know what those are, do you?

I don't have a clue.

[everyone laughs]

They're earplugs,

so you can listen to jazz and your podcasts.

Oh, thank you! They're very nice!

Okay, hey, it's time to open up mine!

You're gonna open up mine.

Okay, let me help you with this.

Yeah, you gonna take too long.

Let me help you open it up. Yep, yep, open it right.

Look at that! Bam! Look at that!

Oh, my goodness! Oh, hey, well...

Yeah!

Picked out of my own closet!

It's a suit.

My friend, where do you go shopping?

I shop at the store.

If you wear that,

you gonna look as stupid as Brown.

Look at it. Look at it.

Shut up, Vinny.

-Thank you, Mr. Brown. -Now, if you wear that,

women gonna be flocking all over you.

I agree with that,

but maybe not in the way he's thinking.

[Efe] Wait, my friend, what...

[everyone laughing]

Well, thank you very much, Mr. Brown.

It's a very unique suit.

Thank you.

-Very unique. -Yeah.

Uh, excuse me.

I'ma need to borrow my brother.

Uh, everything okay?

Yeah, Mom, we're fine.

We're fine, Mom.

You're not acting like you're fine.

-Should we? -Mm, nah. They're older.

They can work things out themselves.

Okay, before we were so rudely interrupted,

he was saying my suit is unique. You like it?

It's very unique. Yes, it is. It's very--

He just said that so he wouldn't hurt

your little fragile-ass feelings.

Grandpa!

I wish you'd swallow a fish hook or something.

Bring it right here, Brown.

Brown, stop it with that, please.

Okay, everyone.

Cora and I have a gift.

You got the gift?

Yeah, I was able to with Philip's help.

Uh, another gift?

Yes, just wait.

Maybe a little car or something.

Maybe a little car or something like that.

Wheelchair?

Baby!

[Vinny] Some crutches, who knows.

Hey, Daddy.

[somber music]

-[Jeremy] Whoa. -[Brown] Oh.

[music]

Whoa.

[Vinny] Oh, man.

Wow.

[Brandon sobbing]

[Vinny] Oh, man.

Daddy, this is my wife, Lisa.

It's so nice to meet you.

You're beautiful.

[chuckles]

And this...

-This is your grandson, Troy. -Hi, Granddad.

-[All] Aww. -[voice breaking] Oh, my.

[Reginald laughing]

-Hi. -[Troy laughs]

[music]

Damn! What is your problem?

This does not belong to Miss Anastasia

or Karen or anybody here.

-Whose is it? -I don't know.

-Stop lying! -Okay. Okay.

Look, it belongs to this girl I've been talking to.

Her name is Megan.

Did you know?

Know what?

That she's pregnant, Philip.

[somber music]

[music]

[music]

[music]

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