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Mornings are tough. There's not enough time
and if anything goes wrong, you're late.
Who schedules a meeting before school?
That is too early for this sh... stuff.
Stuff, I said stuff.
It's not before school anymore. Let's go, Felix.
I'll get him to class. You start without me.
Okay. Okay, okay, let's go. Oh, hi! We're here, hello.
Hi, Mrs. Berney, I have to go teach now.
If you wanna discuss Viv's IEP we could try tomorrow?
Yes, I know, I'm-I'm so sorry, we
were stuck behind a garbage truck.
Sometimes you're late for reasons out of your control.
No, we forgot my lunch.
And sometimes they're totally in your control
but you lost control of being in control.
We did have to go back because Viv forgot her lunch
and then I forgot my bag.
- I get it.
ADHD can be very challenging when you're a parent.
Oh, no, no, no, I don't have ADHD.
Right. Sorry,
I-I just assumed, because it's 91% hereditary.
We could try any morning before school.
- I'm trying now. - Tomorrow is great.
We will be on time.
Come on, Viv, let's get you to class
so I'm not late for work.
Viv, what are you doing?
Hey. Sorry I'm late.
What do I care? I got here two minutes ago.
Look, the inside of my tie has snails on it.
- Hmm. - Your days are numbered, James!
- He's late every day! - Hey, snitch!
- Uh-- - James stole a grocery cart
in college. - Okay, this office
is a living body. Ennis is the appendix.
I mean, no one knows what he does but if we disturb him,
we'll all be poisoned. - That is a huge compliment,
I bet. - You're the heart, James.
And when the heart decides not to work...
...it gets replaced.
They write songs about hearts.
They throw appendixes in the trash.
- Oh! - Okay, shh, shh, come here.
Fintekoäly claims to be implementing
their sales technology but really,
they are here to replace us with AI.
Oh, no, Marla, you're being very paranoid-er than usual.
They are working with Mr. Gero,
watching our asses, determining who is expendable
and then...
...trimming the fat.
These people are kinda nice in a weird,
Scandinavian way. This rep right here,
he brought donuts today. - Take one.
Okay, thank you. Don't mind if I do.
Okay, they are totally hitting it off.
Okay, come here.
- We're right here. - Shh, shh, James.
Now, you two need to be working
like your lives depend on it.
When those Fintekoäly reps report back
what a well-oiled machine I'm running,
they won't dare touch us. I have a hunch
that heads are gonna roll in the east wing.
And when they do, we are gonna take over their offices.
Ooh, that would be sweet. There is a ping-pong table over there.
- Send me east. - It's like Canadian Google
in that east wing. - Okay, get to work!
Am I supposed to actually be worried about this?
About this? Let me tell you something.
I worry about a lot of things. My kids on the internet,
there's like 20 super volcanoes right now that are overdue
to erupt. What I'm not worried about
is Hans Cruller Andersen over here.
- You are out of control.
Are you seeing this?
- Yeah, he's doing goggles. - We love this guy!
Do nose!
Okay. Ooh!
Sorry I'm late, but I can change.
What are you, sleeping here now?
These aren't PJs. They're vegan silk pants.
Hey, should I be apologizing every time I'm late?
- Why start now? - I think it's important
to forgive ourselves when we're late
or we don't show up. - Mm-hmm.
Or when we steal something small.
Oh, hard agree. Everybody's too fast
with labels, late, on time, bad credit, handsome.
Tell me about it. Someone just tried to label me ADHD.
Can you believe it? Me. Astrid.
Reliable Astrid.
I mean, my kid has it, but not everybody has it.
Oh, we have it.
- You both have it? - Yes.
My doctor diagnosed me.
I had to answer 15 questions, Astrid.
I did an online quiz. Pretty compelling results.
That's not how you diagnose ADHD,
that's how you diagnose which Seinfeld character you are.
Elaine.
Get out!
Wait, do you know for sure that you don't have it?
Uh, yeah. 99% sure.
- Oh. - Why am I standing here?
Look at us, getting a jump on tomorrow.
You setting an alarm? - Signs of ADHD in women,
disorganization, forgetfulness,
problems listening. Do any of these sound like me?
Well, I mean, you didn't listen to me just a second ago.
You can't be objective. You're in love with me.
You're head over heels. Who could blame you?
Right, exactly. Oh, yeah.
How am I supposed to know what I'm like?
I'm too busy doing things. - What's all this about?
You think you passed it on? What if I have ADHD
or rejection sensitivity dysphoria
or an unruptured brain aneurysm? - James, you don't have ADHD,
you have hypochondria. - What? No, I don't.
Do I? I do.
Oh, what if that is a symptom
of an underlying problem that's even bigger?
Hello, we're on me right now, okay? We're doing me?
Okay, look, what if neither of us gave it to 'em?
I mean, they didn't inherit everything from us.
Where did Felix get his poor grasp of sarcasm
or his fussiness over textures?
Oh, my God. Dawn!
Oh, we're raising a mini Dawn.
Let's not spiral about that now.
Let's-let's focus on this time thing.
Okay, so I think if we can adjust our mindset
to make early on time,
then we shouldn't have a problem being late.
Right. Yeah, no, no, that's it.
Now all we have to do is explain the concept of time
to our children.
Thank you for coming. We have to get Viv
to school on time for her check-ins.
That means that we have to leave this house by 7:45 AM.
Why is this table so smooth?
Well, 'cause I took all the stuff off it
so we wouldn't be distracted. Okay.
I've never seen the whole table in my life.
I thought it was a different colour.
Felix, stop pretending not to recognize the table.
What's this thing?
What?
Oh, my God.
- Hmm. - Is this table expandable?
I don't know. Oh.
Oh, my God!
That is so fun!
That's why the lady at the garage sale sold me
that extra piece of wood! It's just sitting in the shed.
Now there's enough room for a puzzle and to have snacks.
Kids have a lot of questions.
So much curiosity and tiny attention spans.
They get distracted, which means you get distracted.
And the more you get distracted,
the less time you have for stuff you hope to do.
Or want to do. Or need to do.
Yeah, found the horn.
- It's called the corn. - That's wrong.
Guys, focus on the puzzle, please.
- Mm-mm. - Wait, no, we got distracted
by the big table. We're supposed to be coming up with a plan
to get to school on time. - Yes, um...
- James? - We pack our lunches
and we plan our outfits and our meltdowns ahead of time,
Viv, not looking at you, also looking at you.
I know, we can get a dog
so he can bark us awake in the morning.
Or you guys could go to sleep on time so you don't sleep in.
I could eat breakfast super fast.
Yeah, but not like so fast,
right, because we don't want you to choke.
- I know what I'm doing. - Guys, we all need to work
together so we can get to school for 8:00 AM.
We're doing this for Viv, right? - That means no doing
our homework the day of. We get outta bed
and we move out. Understood?
- Understood?
Understood.
♪ Where's your head at ♪
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Oh, come on, I got syrup on me.
It's okay, that's okay, we've made time for this.
Nobody panic. - Just go upstairs,
get changed lickety-split. I'm gonna grab Morris.
You get the car keys? - Wait, no, I thought,
I thought you had the car keys? - No, I gave you the car keys.
You have the car keys. - Okay, now I'm panicking.
Okay, Felix, help us look for the car keys, please. Okay?
Okay, uh, what do they look like?
- They look like keys. - Got it.
You come in the door. You come in the door.
- Viv, hurry up! - You remember what jacket you were wearing?
- Uh, the green one? - No, okay.
Focus. Focus on finding the keys.
Let me just think. Come in the door.
Yeah, found 'em!
Back on track, people. No, Viv,
you can't wear a costume to school.
Come on. Come on, hurry up.
You left them in the door. Remember what they were saying
about forgetfulness and ADHD?
- Oh, gosh.
Okay. No, no, listen, ten deep breaths, ready?
We do not have time right now for a tantrum.
You know this. We do not-- - You're not the boss of me!
♪ Where's your head at ♪
Ah! Ow! Ah, oh!
- Hey, what's going on? - I got gel in my eyes.
Okay, just flush it out. Stop rubbing.
Ah! I'm blind!
No, no, no, stop. Hey, hold still, hold still.
What's going on with you?
I slept with my ponytail in to save time.
Now my neck is broken.
Uh, Felix, open your eyes and let me help you flush it.
- Are we gonna be late again? - Oh, absolutely.
Good morning.
What time is it? Oh, my God.
Oh, we're late. The alarm didn't go off.
- Why didn't you wake us up? - You just looked so peaceful.
Whew, hey. You ready?
I'm the problem. I'm the reason why we're not
getting out on time. - No, no,
we're all failing together, honey.
No, I set the radio alarm and it didn't go off.
- Well, that happens. - My phone alarm also
didn't go off because I didn't charge it and it died.
- My phone didn't go off either. - I turned off your phone alarm
'cause I don't like the sound of your alarm.
What's the matter with my alarm sound?
- It's loud and annoying. - It's an alarm.
Yeah, to wake up, James, not for a Kaiju!
Is there a Kaiju coming? Kaiju!
I can't believe you know the word Kaiju.
We're gonna be late.
We already missed the meeting, right?
Well, we still have to get to school.
And work. Yep, he's right. Let's go, we're late.
Well, I did it again. She strikes again!
She done done it.
Hey, Marla. Uh, just, I'm sorry I'm late. The 427--
- I just visited the east wing. - Yeah.
And those losers got a catered breakfast
compliments of Fintekoäly. - Uh...
Those reps were out there smiling
and passing out paper plates. - Uh-huh.
With tiny muffins and croissants.
And melon. But not that trash honeydew.
Fresh cantaloupe.
Hey, everybody, there's a fancy breakfast in the east wing.
Ay...
- Hey, geez. - Marla, you gotta take it easy,
these are day-olds. - Look at these snacks.
Generic crap. Baggie's Buys Chips.
Oh, Baggie's Buys Granola Bars!
Baggie's Buys Fruit Snacks.
We um... are the Baggie's Buys division.
I built Baggie's Buys. Where are my tiny muffins?
Well, they're actually right next to the smoked salmon.
I could go rustle you up a plate if you'd like.
Fintekoäly needs to know what we mean to Gero's Grocery.
I-I-If this is King's Landing,
we are the maester's of the small council.
- I don't know what that means. - I don't get that reference.
If Gero's Grocery is Destiny's Child,
we are Beyoncé.
- That one I get, yeah. - Okay, that one makes sense to me.
Yeah, yeah. You want us to make them say our name.
Or we won't be a survivor. No, no, no, no, no.
Get to work and be on time, time, time.
I'm just gonna have one of these donuts real quick.
Anyone want some fresh cantaloupe?
Okay. I guess I still haven't tried cantaloupe.
There we go. Hey, dear!
- Thanks, Mom. - Hi, Mom. Dawn.
You've turned into a purse. - It's a sauna, smarty-pants.
I am increasing circulation and releasing toxins.
You could borrow it if your house
wasn't so cluttered and cramped.
You look like a big, dumb hermit crab.
Speaking of my cluttered house,
Mom, did I show any signs of ADHD when I was a kid?
Oh, please, everyone has a problem these days.
You didn't have ADHD. Sure, you were a daydreamer,
and a dawdler, and a fussy pants, but so what?
Those all sound like ADHD behaviours
that I've apparently passed on to Viv.
Pfft.
It's not that parents today have more things
to worry about than our own parents did
or that those worries are more important.
Actually, never mind,
our own parents were asleep at the wheel.
Think of all the wonderful things you've passed down
on to your kids, like the joie de vivre you got from me.
And Corey got his intelligence and singing voice
from me, and his skin sensitivity from Bo.
He's the perfect blend.
Hmm, yeah, well I understand how genetics work, I just...
I don't know, I feel guilty.
Don't. Feel lucky because here's something else
I'm passing down on to you.
No one wants your rollers, Mom.
Mom, stop giving us your garbage and pretending
it's a present. - Oh, fine.
Do you mind if I put my pants in there for 15 minutes?
They're all wrinkly-dinkly from sitting.
- Oh, um. - Okay.
- Oh, my God. - How fun.
Just us girls, right? - Uh-huh.
Hello.
Is Daddy kicking you out of the house? Fleas again?
Go on, tell her.
I'm going to sleep on the porch tonight.
- No, you're not. - Oh.
Hate to say I told you so, but uh, in your face, kiddo.
- No, no, no, no.
Felix's broken scooter was stolen off the front porch.
There's no way they're not stealing a mint condition child.
Every day we lose at being on time and I wanna win.
That's called determination. Get that from your mom.
You're also a sore loser. You get that from your mom, too.
That's why we don't play board games in this house.
Yes, it's true, I'm afraid, you and I are alike.
We don't go down without a fight.
And you know what? That's why we're gonna be
so on time tomorrow,
we're gonna beat that counsellor to her office.
Unless she sleeps over at school.
Oh, creating unlikely scenarios to worry about.
That you get from me.
Hey, you know what?
Sometimes when Mommy gets really mad,
that actually helps me try harder.
What do you think about getting really mad at being late?
Let's do this!
Nothing can stop us now.
Oh, it's the smoke detector, it's doing that thing.
- Detecting smoke? - No, no, it just needs
new batteries. I'll do it in the morning.
- James.
I'll do it now.
Can't get back to sleep.
- It's 2:00 AM. - Yeah, we went to bed too early.
I took a six-hour nap. - So, what are we gonna do?
Oh, uh. It's 7:20.
We have to be out of here by 7:45!
Okay, we gotta be outta here like in ten minutes.
Hey, ho, there they are. Look at this, fully dressed!
Yeah, you got underwear on?
- Two pairs. - Nice.
I'll skip brushing my teeth today.
Okay, well you can brush them in the car
and you can spit when we get to school.
Viv, stop chewing, just swallow.
Okay, we got seven minutes, we can do it.
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
Alright, purse, car keys, phone.
Let me grab Morris. We are in good shape.
Here we go and...
poo face. - Where's the potty?
♪ Where's your head at ♪
It's on the stairs for some reason!
Somebody get the ABC book.
There's farm animals in it!
Dump it out!
He's ready, he's ready.
Come on, Morris, you can do this.
Go eat, go on. Go on.
Here we go, here we go.
Should we just put him in a diaper?
No, we can't regress now.
Guys, let's sing the song together.
♪ Poop goes in the potty ♪
♪ When it comes out your body ♪
♪ Poop goes in the potty ♪
♪ When it comes out your body ♪
No, no, no!
He's bluffing. Let's go!
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
- Okay, okay. - Pants back on, pants back on,
pants back on. And then we go up. Wee!
Thank you.
- Where is everybody? - Yeah, it's a PA Day.
- Oh. - I knew that.
What? Why didn't you say anything?
Nobody asked me.
Well, you know what?
We made it here by 8:00 AM.
We are on time. We did it!
Nobody's here, but it still counts.
- Yeah!
Hey, uh, by some miracle, did we arrange
childcare for the day? - Oh, hell no.
- Okay. - Ugh, P-U!
Morris was not bluffing.
- Come on, Morris. - Ooh!
Remember when we wanted to go out,
we just left the house?
Hmm, no diaper bags, no car seats,
no screaming, just walking out the door.
Hmm. Now we're in charge of other people's schedules
and they don't care if they're late.
They don't even know where they're going most of the time.
So, yeah, you can go outta your mind
trying to get outta the house, but uh...
Yeah, not really a but on this one.
Hmm, no. Getting everyone organized
to leave on time sucks. It sucks.
Sucks!
You think she noticed
that we're not on time? - Yep.
But I got a good excuse for being late.
See, Viv has ADHD and it takes up a lot of our time.
Plus, I got a secret weapon. - Wait a second, you can use
your kids as an excuse for your own failings?
That's a game-changer! - Late again?
Uh, hey Marla. I, uh, now, technically,
I'm not actually late. I know it seems like it.
I was in Brampton at a sleepover.
It was an unfamiliar commute. - I was on time,
but then I became late when I stopped
to get you mini muffins.
- From both of us, right? - Eh...
It has been a pleasure working with you both.
I'm sorry, but you've been let go.
Okay, Marla, I know, I apologize a lot
and that probably lessens the effectiveness
of the apology, but hear me out.
Viv has ADHD. It's a growing concern
and we've obviously been very worried about it.
- We? I'm sorry. - You don't think I've lost
sleep and subsequently slept in, missed my alarm,
come in late worrying about Viv and little Phoenix?
- Felix. - Felix?
Attention!
As I have been warning for months now,
Fintekoäly has bought Gero's Grocery.
Excuse me?
They are closing the Baggie's Buys division
and we've all been made redundant.
What? Okay...
Marla, I'm so sorry I'm late.
I slipped in the shower right on my head.
I don't know how long I was out for, but I rallied.
Get to work, Beth.
You haven't said much about losing your job.
Huh.
Are you okay?
Are you, are you sad, are you angry?
I don't... I mean, I hated that job,
but a lot of great memories there.
- Part of it. - Great.
- Transaction approved. - That's how we do it.
Alright, alright.
I am taking every-- Scorched Earth!
Try this, James. - Canana Colada.
Boom.
- Mark my words,
do not fail.
See this, at least?
♪ Good life, good life ♪
- Well, this is game. - Are you seeing this?
♪ Like the city is on fire tonight ♪
♪ This could really be a good life ♪
♪ A good, good life... ♪
Okay, have a nice day.
Actually, those memories suck.
I'm not gonna miss that place at all.
Okay then. To the future.
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