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00:00:03,753 --> 00:00:11,052
[ Static ]
[ Static ]
[ Static ]
2
00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:15,515
♪ My dreams are all dead
and buried ♪
♪ My dreams are all dead
and buried ♪
3
00:00:15,598 --> 00:00:19,894
♪ Sometimes I wish the sun
would just explode ♪
♪ Sometimes I wish the sun
would just explode ♪
4
00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:24,107
♪ When God comes
and calls me to His kingdom ♪
♪ When God comes
and calls me to His kingdom ♪
♪ When God comes
and calls me to His kingdom ♪
5
00:00:24,190 --> 00:00:28,486
♪ I'll take all
you sons of bitches when I go ♪
♪ I'll take all
you sons of bitches when I go ♪
6
00:00:28,570 --> 00:00:29,738
♪ Oh, let her blow ♪
My turn.
7
00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:31,072
Hell no.
Hey, man, let me drive
8
00:00:31,156 --> 00:00:35,452
that thing, come on!
Do not touch the trim!
that thing, come on!
Do not touch the trim!
9
00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:38,204
♪♪
♪♪
10
00:00:38,288 --> 00:00:40,123
Homemade surf 'n' slosh.
Homemade surf 'n' slosh.
11
00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:43,501
Just as good as store-bought,
at a fraction of the price.
12
00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:45,044
I life-hacked this bitch!
I life-hacked this bitch!
13
00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:47,005
All you did was take
the tarp off the roof.
14
00:00:47,088 --> 00:00:48,256
And is that
our shower curtain?
And is that
our shower curtain?
15
00:00:48,339 --> 00:00:49,340
Listen to him bellyache
16
00:00:49,424 --> 00:00:50,467
about a shower curtain,
17
00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:52,343
and we ain't even
got a shower.
and we ain't even
got a shower.
18
00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:54,596
Now hold my beer.
19
00:00:54,679 --> 00:00:56,639
Oh!
This is paint thinner.
Oh!
This is paint thinner.
20
00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:58,224
"Hold my beer"
is a fun thing to say
21
00:00:58,308 --> 00:01:00,977
before you do something
exciting and badass,
before you do something
exciting and badass,
22
00:01:01,060 --> 00:01:02,187
but also very safe
23
00:01:02,270 --> 00:01:04,731
and definitely won't end
in tragedy.
and definitely won't end
in tragedy.
24
00:01:04,814 --> 00:01:07,066
Hell yeah, baby!
25
00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:07,942
Oof!
26
00:01:08,026 --> 00:01:09,027
Oh! Oh, God!
27
00:01:09,110 --> 00:01:09,986
The rocks! Aah!
28
00:01:10,069 --> 00:01:11,863
There are so much!
Oh, God!
29
00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:13,156
I should've picked them out!
I should've picked them out!
30
00:01:13,239 --> 00:01:14,824
Oof!
But I'm too lazy!
31
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:15,909
Oh, God!
32
00:01:15,992 --> 00:01:16,743
No!
No!
33
00:01:16,826 --> 00:01:17,869
Oh, God! Oh!
34
00:01:17,952 --> 00:01:18,912
Oh, it burns!
35
00:01:18,995 --> 00:01:21,498
Oh.
Oh.
36
00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,500
Whoo-hoo-hoo-wee!
37
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:25,168
Hell yeah!
It worked!
Hell yeah!
It worked!
38
00:01:25,251 --> 00:01:26,836
Go on, do it, Granny!
39
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:27,796
Oh, well,
40
00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:29,589
I was gonna decline...
I was gonna decline...
41
00:01:29,672 --> 00:01:31,591
Tell them to hold your beer
and do it!
42
00:01:31,674 --> 00:01:32,675
Okay.
Okay.
43
00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:34,219
Hold my beer.
44
00:01:34,302 --> 00:01:35,845
I don't have a beer,
but would you
45
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:37,514
hold my teeth, dear?
hold my teeth, dear?
46
00:01:37,597 --> 00:01:38,848
I don't wanna
lose them.
47
00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:42,185
Ah, suck on this,
you pussy-y-y-y-y!
Ah, suck on this,
you pussy-y-y-y-y!
48
00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:44,062
[ Screeching ]
Oh, my God!
[ Screeching ]
Oh, my God!
49
00:01:44,145 --> 00:01:45,897
-Giant owl!
-Aaaaaaah!
50
00:01:45,980 --> 00:01:47,816
It's got Granny!
Shoot it down!
51
00:01:47,899 --> 00:01:50,193
You shoot it!
I've got to hide!
You shoot it!
I've got to hide!
52
00:01:50,276 --> 00:01:51,402
-Aah!
-Aah!
53
00:01:51,486 --> 00:01:52,695
[ Gunshots ]
Granny!
[ Gunshots ]
Granny!
54
00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:54,906
[ Gunshots ]
Aah!
55
00:01:54,989 --> 00:01:56,324
♪♪
♪♪
56
00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:58,201
[ Organ plays ]
Granny and I,
57
00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:00,370
we had our differences
we had our differences
58
00:02:00,453 --> 00:02:02,080
and I may have fantasized
59
00:02:02,163 --> 00:02:05,375
about her getting snatched up
by a giant owl,
about her getting snatched up
by a giant owl,
60
00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:08,127
but I never really
wanted that to happen.
but I never really
wanted that to happen.
61
00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:10,421
Eugh!
Green been casserole.
62
00:02:10,505 --> 00:02:12,340
Don't you work
at the hot wing place?
Don't you work
at the hot wing place?
63
00:02:12,423 --> 00:02:14,759
That's the only reason why
I invited your ass.
64
00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:16,135
Just give it back to me.
Just give it back to me.
65
00:02:16,219 --> 00:02:18,179
That owl took
the wrong squid.
66
00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:19,597
Oh, don't be like that!
67
00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:21,558
Just set it over
on the "Maybe" table,
Just set it over
on the "Maybe" table,
68
00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:24,102
as in, maybe I'll
get a dog someday.
as in, maybe I'll
get a dog someday.
69
00:02:24,185 --> 00:02:25,770
An owl attack
70
00:02:25,854 --> 00:02:27,564
in the middle
of the daytime, huh?
71
00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:29,607
I know.
It's terrifying.
I know.
It's terrifying.
72
00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:32,235
Day owls. I never heard
of anything like it.
Day owls. I never heard
of anything like it.
73
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:33,570
'Cause it didn't happen.
74
00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,530
I'll bet he chopped her
into little pieces
75
00:02:35,613 --> 00:02:37,240
and scattered her all
over the back 40.
and scattered her all
over the back 40.
76
00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:39,242
Denny!
Now's not the time.
77
00:02:39,325 --> 00:02:40,785
Rusty saw it happen.
Rusty saw it happen.
78
00:02:40,869 --> 00:02:42,579
Their stories
all match up.
79
00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:45,081
Then I said, "Take me,
you winged devil!"
Then I said, "Take me,
you winged devil!"
80
00:02:45,164 --> 00:02:46,457
For the most part.
81
00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:48,001
And I jumped up
and put the beast
And I jumped up
and put the beast
82
00:02:48,084 --> 00:02:49,878
in a airborne
figure-4 headlock,
83
00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:51,838
but she shook me off,
'cause they got them
84
00:02:51,921 --> 00:02:53,756
twisty necks,
like a Lazy Susan.
twisty necks,
like a Lazy Susan.
85
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:54,924
Well, yeah, you know.
86
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:56,050
I know you did
what you could.
I know you did
what you could.
87
00:02:56,134 --> 00:02:56,926
-[ Coughing ]
-I got to --
88
00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:58,011
I got to get, now.
89
00:02:58,094 --> 00:02:59,721
Then, the bird
carried her off.
90
00:02:59,804 --> 00:03:01,389
[ Crying ]
I'll never forget
[ Crying ]
I'll never forget
91
00:03:01,472 --> 00:03:02,932
her final words --
92
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:05,476
"Make sure you have
a fix-your-own-fajita bar
"Make sure you have
a fix-your-own-fajita bar
93
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:07,186
at my serviiiice!"
94
00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:09,439
Right, so we'll --
we'll see you in church?
Right, so we'll --
we'll see you in church?
95
00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:11,482
Well, Granny made us go
to that, you know?
96
00:03:11,566 --> 00:03:13,902
So, don't freak out if our
attendance drops off a bit.
So, don't freak out if our
attendance drops off a bit.
97
00:03:13,985 --> 00:03:15,528
-Of course.
-But maybe next week,
98
00:03:15,612 --> 00:03:17,363
bring some more
of that seven-layer dip.
bring some more
of that seven-layer dip.
99
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:19,198
That stuff was a hit with me.
100
00:03:19,282 --> 00:03:21,576
Well, this isn't really
a weekly thing, Early.
Well, this isn't really
a weekly thing, Early.
101
00:03:21,659 --> 00:03:23,119
It's kind of
a one-shot deal.
102
00:03:23,202 --> 00:03:25,496
[ Crying ] So, you think grief
just goes away, huh?
[ Crying ] So, you think grief
just goes away, huh?
103
00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:26,915
[ Sniffle ]
Like my granny there,
104
00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:29,000
when she was snatched up
by a giant owl.
when she was snatched up
by a giant owl.
105
00:03:29,083 --> 00:03:31,794
I guess I need
some sort of grief owl
106
00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:34,547
to swoop down
and steal my sadness away.
to swoop down
and steal my sadness away.
107
00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:36,507
[ Sobs ]
Now get out of here!
[ Sobs ]
Now get out of here!
108
00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:37,926
I need to be alone!
109
00:03:38,009 --> 00:03:39,928
[ Sobbing ]
110
00:03:40,011 --> 00:03:41,262
This poor baby.
111
00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:42,722
Look at him, shivering.
112
00:03:42,805 --> 00:03:44,974
He's scared to death he's
gon' get snatched up.
He's scared to death he's
gon' get snatched up.
113
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:46,684
Oh, now, boy.
You know your daddy
114
00:03:46,768 --> 00:03:48,394
ain't gonna let
no big-ass owl get you.
ain't gonna let
no big-ass owl get you.
115
00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:50,772
You see me work a Tae Bo
stick, ain't you?
116
00:03:50,855 --> 00:03:51,814
Waa-hoo! Ha!
117
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,816
-[ Gasp ]
-Oh, sorry, buddy.
-[ Gasp ]
-Oh, sorry, buddy.
118
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,485
But, in a way,
you're very lucky,
119
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,153
'cause if this was a real
Tae Bo stick,
'cause if this was a real
Tae Bo stick,
120
00:03:57,236 --> 00:03:58,613
you'd be dead right now.
121
00:03:58,696 --> 00:04:00,531
[ Echoing ]
Well, looky here.
[ Echoing ]
Well, looky here.
122
00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:01,783
Seems the giant owl
123
00:04:01,866 --> 00:04:04,118
left Granny's skull
in this burn barrel.
left Granny's skull
in this burn barrel.
124
00:04:04,202 --> 00:04:05,870
-Denny!
-This is a crime scene.
125
00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:06,871
Tape it off.
-No, no, no.
126
00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:08,164
That's a raccoon skull.
That's a raccoon skull.
127
00:04:08,247 --> 00:04:09,958
I'mma make that
into a gearshifter.
128
00:04:10,041 --> 00:04:12,794
Well, we'll see if the boys
at the GBI agree with you,
Well, we'll see if the boys
at the GBI agree with you,
129
00:04:12,877 --> 00:04:15,171
'cause I think your owl
story's a bunch of hooey.
130
00:04:15,254 --> 00:04:17,340
[ Chuckle ]
I hear that.
[ Chuckle ]
I hear that.
131
00:04:17,423 --> 00:04:19,008
Glenn, are you
out of your mind?
132
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,718
There's a giant owl
on the loose.
There's a giant owl
on the loose.
133
00:04:20,802 --> 00:04:22,512
Yeah, I'm not living
in fear.
134
00:04:22,595 --> 00:04:23,680
Good luck, sheeple.
135
00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:25,515
If there is
a giant owl up there,
If there is
a giant owl up there,
136
00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:27,350
he don't want a taste
of the G-Dog,
137
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:28,393
[ Wings flapping ]
I promise you.
[ Wings flapping ]
I promise you.
138
00:04:28,476 --> 00:04:29,852
[ Suspenseful music plays ]
139
00:04:29,936 --> 00:04:30,853
[ Owl screeching ]
Oh, my God!
140
00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,313
Aah!
[ Gasping ]
Aah!
[ Gasping ]
141
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:33,523
Mommy!
142
00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:34,899
[ Coos ]
143
00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:36,359
Shush. Shh!
Shush. Shh!
144
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:38,736
[ Gasp ]
145
00:04:38,820 --> 00:04:40,238
[ Coos ]
[ Coos ]
146
00:04:40,321 --> 00:04:41,364
Oh!
147
00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:42,365
[ Coos ]
148
00:04:42,448 --> 00:04:44,534
Oh, oh,
he's looking at me!
Oh, oh,
he's looking at me!
149
00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:48,329
Denny, don't...move.
Denny, don't...move.
150
00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:49,372
[ Hyperventilating ]
151
00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:51,207
Me not stay here!
Aah!
152
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:52,917
Denny, no!
You can't outrun him!
Denny, no!
You can't outrun him!
153
00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:55,837
-[ Screeching ]
-Aah! Aah!
154
00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:56,838
Aaaaah!
Aaaaah!
155
00:04:56,921 --> 00:04:59,215
Ahhh-ooohh-woo!
156
00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:01,092
[ Gong crashes ]
[ Gong crashes ]
157
00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:02,760
♪♪
158
00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:04,220
Oh, my God, he's got me!
Oh, my God, he's got me!
159
00:05:04,303 --> 00:05:05,888
He's got my head!
-Rusty!
160
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:07,140
No!
Hell no!
161
00:05:07,223 --> 00:05:09,183
Daddy! Daddy!
Daddy! Daddy!
162
00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:11,060
Put him down,
you dumb jerk!
163
00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:12,603
[ Grunting ]
[ Grunting ]
164
00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:18,026
[ Gunshots ]
[ Gunshots ]
165
00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:19,068
[ Gasping ]
166
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,737
Did I -- Did I get him?
Did I -- Did I get him?
167
00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:21,988
[ Air hissing ]
168
00:05:22,071 --> 00:05:25,408
[ Crying ] Oh, no!
My boy!
[ Crying ] Oh, no!
My boy!
169
00:05:25,491 --> 00:05:27,952
Looks like we have
to do this again next week.
170
00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:31,247
No veggies, this time.
171
00:05:31,330 --> 00:05:33,666
Unless you count mac & cheese.
Unless you count mac & cheese.
172
00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:36,544
The real cheese,
not the powdered!
The real cheese,
not the powdered!
173
00:05:36,627 --> 00:05:37,545
♪♪
♪♪
174
00:05:37,628 --> 00:05:38,921
Mr. Halen,
we're gonna need
175
00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:42,008
trackers, sharpshooters,
and wildlife experts.
trackers, sharpshooters,
and wildlife experts.
176
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:43,676
I know you don't like
the feds coming
177
00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,261
down here, but,
that might be
down here, but,
that might be
178
00:05:45,344 --> 00:05:47,388
the only way you --
-Hold on. Stop, stop.
179
00:05:47,472 --> 00:05:51,225
Has the owl attacked any
humans that we know of?
Has the owl attacked any
humans that we know of?
180
00:05:51,309 --> 00:05:52,435
Well, no.
181
00:05:52,518 --> 00:05:53,936
Just Granny and Rusty,
so far,
Just Granny and Rusty,
so far,
182
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:56,522
but, you know --
-So, squids, exclusively.
183
00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:58,399
Seems to me this owl craves
Seems to me this owl craves
184
00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:00,568
a chewy treat
with a gushy middle,
185
00:06:00,651 --> 00:06:03,196
and the Cuyler clan seems
to fit that bill.
and the Cuyler clan seems
to fit that bill.
186
00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:05,531
Frankly, I-I don't see
the downside.
Frankly, I-I don't see
the downside.
187
00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:08,409
But -- But when the squids
are gone, you know,
188
00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:09,952
they might come
after the humans.
they might come
after the humans.
189
00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:13,372
No. Apple-picking season
will proceed as planned.
No. Apple-picking season
will proceed as planned.
190
00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:16,626
And can we stop reporting
the owl attacks, please?
191
00:06:16,709 --> 00:06:20,963
If we don't count them,
there won't be any.
If we don't count them,
there won't be any.
If we don't count them,
there won't be any.
192
00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:22,799
[ Radio chatter ]
[ Engine idling ]
193
00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:24,258
[ Keys jingling ]
Here we are, Denny.
194
00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:26,010
You stay frosty out there.
You stay frosty out there.
195
00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:27,512
Keep your head
on a swivel, son.
196
00:06:27,595 --> 00:06:29,305
The swivel only goes
side-to-side.
The swivel only goes
side-to-side.
197
00:06:29,388 --> 00:06:30,473
I mean, the owl,
198
00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:31,766
she's right above us.
-Goddamn it!
199
00:06:31,849 --> 00:06:32,767
You know what I mean.
You know what I mean.
200
00:06:32,850 --> 00:06:34,060
It's weapons hot out there
201
00:06:34,143 --> 00:06:35,686
and, if you wait
'til that owl swoops,
202
00:06:35,770 --> 00:06:37,271
it'll be too damn late.
it'll be too damn late.
203
00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:40,983
So just fire it
up in the air everywhere?
So just fire it
up in the air everywhere?
204
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:41,943
That's right.
205
00:06:42,026 --> 00:06:42,985
Remember your training --
206
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:44,779
officers always shoot first
officers always shoot first
207
00:06:44,862 --> 00:06:46,280
and empty your clip.
208
00:06:46,364 --> 00:06:49,867
We can always plant a gun
in the owl's beak later.
We can always plant a gun
in the owl's beak later.
209
00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:51,160
Now, Denny,
210
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,453
hold my beer, buddy.
211
00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:54,163
[ Tearfully ]
You hold my beer.
[ Tearfully ]
You hold my beer.
212
00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:56,791
Alright, now,
on the count of three --
Alright, now,
on the count of three --
213
00:06:56,874 --> 00:06:58,167
1, 2 --
214
00:06:58,251 --> 00:06:59,335
[ Gunshots ]
-Aah!
-Denny, wait!
215
00:06:59,418 --> 00:07:00,837
[ Gunfire ]
Both: Aah!
[ Gunfire ]
Both: Aah!
216
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,171
Aaaaaaah!
217
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:03,297
-Aaaaah!
-Out of ammo!
218
00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:04,590
Got to reload!
-Aaah!
219
00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:06,801
-Reload! Reload! Reload!
-Aaaaah!
-Reload! Reload! Reload!
-Aaaaah!
220
00:07:06,884 --> 00:07:08,636
[ Gunfire ]
Both: Aaaah!
221
00:07:08,719 --> 00:07:09,512
Aaaaah!
Aaaaah!
222
00:07:09,595 --> 00:07:11,556
Aaaaah!
223
00:07:11,639 --> 00:07:13,391
-Hey, you left early.
-You said on three!
-Hey, you left early.
-You said on three!
224
00:07:13,474 --> 00:07:15,476
-It's "1, 2, 3, go."
-You said
225
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:17,562
on three!
-There's a "go" aspect to it.
on three!
-There's a "go" aspect to it.
226
00:07:17,645 --> 00:07:19,438
[ Slurp ]
227
00:07:19,522 --> 00:07:20,398
May I help you?
228
00:07:20,481 --> 00:07:22,441
No, but I can help you.
No, but I can help you.
229
00:07:22,525 --> 00:07:24,694
I hear you're having
a little owl problem.
230
00:07:24,777 --> 00:07:26,696
Yes, ma'am,
but it ain't little.
231
00:07:26,779 --> 00:07:30,533
More like a flying minivan that
eats people and never sleeps.
More like a flying minivan that
eats people and never sleeps.
232
00:07:30,616 --> 00:07:32,076
Not people, just squid.
233
00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:34,453
People are safe,
from what I understand.
People are safe,
from what I understand.
234
00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,372
Sounds like Ol' Hootie.
235
00:07:36,455 --> 00:07:38,291
I've been tracking her
for years.
I've been tracking her
for years.
236
00:07:38,374 --> 00:07:39,876
Dr. Anastasia Evertree.
237
00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:41,419
Yeah, thank you, doctor,
but the men
Yeah, thank you, doctor,
but the men
238
00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:42,879
can take it from here, okay?
239
00:07:42,962 --> 00:07:45,590
"The men"? Ha!
Aren't you cute.
"The men"? Ha!
Aren't you cute.
240
00:07:45,673 --> 00:07:48,551
Bet you look like a popcorn
shrimp to Ol' Hootie.
241
00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:49,927
Unh-unh!
I will not have you
Unh-unh!
I will not have you
242
00:07:50,011 --> 00:07:51,554
talk to me that way
in this office!
243
00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:53,890
Well, then, I'll talk to you
that way on the hunting ground.
Well, then, I'll talk to you
that way on the hunting ground.
244
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,099
Take me there.
245
00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:57,185
And try not to look
so scrumptious,
And try not to look
so scrumptious,
246
00:07:57,268 --> 00:07:58,227
Popcorn.
247
00:07:58,311 --> 00:07:59,437
Pop, pop, pop!
-Aah!
248
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:00,521
[ Laughs ]
249
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:01,606
I'm taking the tank.
I'm taking the tank.
250
00:08:01,689 --> 00:08:03,274
She's just being sassy.
251
00:08:03,357 --> 00:08:05,568
Shaking up this boy's club.
Shaking up this boy's club.
252
00:08:05,651 --> 00:08:06,903
What are you doing, mister?
253
00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:08,905
I'm taking the tank!
I'm taking the tank!
254
00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:11,908
♪♪
255
00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:13,242
[ Blast,
missiles whistling ]
[ Blast,
missiles whistling ]
256
00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:15,077
Aah! Whah!
257
00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,580
Aah!
Aah!
258
00:08:17,663 --> 00:08:18,581
Phew!
259
00:08:18,664 --> 00:08:19,415
[ Pounding on door ]
260
00:08:19,498 --> 00:08:21,083
Early, are you in there?
Early, are you in there?
261
00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:24,253
Go away! You'll lead that
damn bird right to me.
262
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:25,630
I've got good news.
I've got good news.
263
00:08:25,713 --> 00:08:27,840
I'm here
with a ornithologist.
264
00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:31,510
That means it's a bird
expert, from UGA.
That means it's a bird
expert, from UGA.
265
00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:32,678
UGA?
266
00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:34,847
Georgia Bulldogs
between the hedges,
267
00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:38,100
Herschel Walker football,
go dogs, sic 'em?
Herschel Walker football,
go dogs, sic 'em?
268
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:40,269
[ Slurping ]
-Early, you look like hell.
269
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:41,771
I'm so hungry,
I've been eating
I'm so hungry,
I've been eating
270
00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:42,855
from the "Maybe" table.
271
00:08:42,939 --> 00:08:44,607
Mmm, ambrosia.
272
00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:45,608
Uh, you mind if I --
Uh, you mind if I --
273
00:08:45,691 --> 00:08:48,152
No!
I'm still grieving here.
274
00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:51,030
Ol' Hootie ain't as picky
about what she eats.
Ol' Hootie ain't as picky
about what she eats.
275
00:08:51,113 --> 00:08:52,949
Usually just
swallows things whole
Usually just
swallows things whole
276
00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:54,700
and craps out the bones.
277
00:08:54,784 --> 00:08:57,495
How dare you sully the memory
of my son and my granny
How dare you sully the memory
of my son and my granny
278
00:08:57,578 --> 00:09:00,248
by dumping them as poop balls
in my living room!
279
00:09:00,331 --> 00:09:02,625
I don't want to remember
them this way!
I don't want to remember
them this way!
280
00:09:02,708 --> 00:09:03,793
Look closer.
281
00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:05,544
I'm not seeing
any squid remains,
I'm not seeing
any squid remains,
282
00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:08,256
which means your family
could still be alive.
283
00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:11,384
But the only way we'll know
for sure is to track this owl
But the only way we'll know
for sure is to track this owl
284
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:14,095
and, to draw the owl in,
we're gonna need some bait.
and, to draw the owl in,
we're gonna need some bait.
285
00:09:14,178 --> 00:09:16,264
And they don't want humans.
They want squids.
286
00:09:16,347 --> 00:09:17,682
The humans are safe.
The humans are safe.
287
00:09:17,765 --> 00:09:19,934
That-That's what
we've seen, so far.
288
00:09:20,017 --> 00:09:21,894
That's right.
We need a squid.
That's right.
We need a squid.
289
00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:23,354
Can you help us, Early?
290
00:09:23,437 --> 00:09:26,482
[ Sigh ] Alright,
if it's a squid you need,
[ Sigh ] Alright,
if it's a squid you need,
291
00:09:26,565 --> 00:09:28,776
I guess I know
what I have to do.
I guess I know
what I have to do.
292
00:09:28,859 --> 00:09:30,987
Lil!
Hey, girl!
293
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:32,113
It's been so long!
294
00:09:32,196 --> 00:09:33,155
Give us a hug!
Give us a hug!
295
00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:34,657
No!
I moved in with Emmett
296
00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:35,658
to get away from all y'all
297
00:09:35,741 --> 00:09:36,993
and my addiction triggers.
and my addiction triggers.
298
00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:39,537
Hey, I see Emmett's
taking good care of you.
299
00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:41,330
Sobriety suits you well.
Sobriety suits you well.
300
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,332
She's not fucked up.
This gon' be tricky.
301
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:45,584
You know what?
I sure have missed you.
You know what?
I sure have missed you.
302
00:09:45,668 --> 00:09:47,878
Let's reminisce,
with you outside,
303
00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:50,339
exposed to the sky
and chained to this chain.
exposed to the sky
and chained to this chain.
304
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:51,591
I got some of that giggle juice.
305
00:09:51,674 --> 00:09:53,634
Stop grabbing at me!
Stop grabbing at me!
306
00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:54,802
Where's Granny and Rusty?
307
00:09:54,885 --> 00:09:56,137
Snatched up by an owl.
308
00:09:56,220 --> 00:09:57,930
I said don't mention
the killer owl, dumbass!
I said don't mention
the killer owl, dumbass!
309
00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:00,433
Emmett: Lilith,
is everything alright?
310
00:10:00,516 --> 00:10:02,059
Just a salesman, honey.
Just a salesman, honey.
311
00:10:02,143 --> 00:10:03,728
But I ain't buying.
312
00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:04,854
[ Owl screeching ]
[ Owl screeching ]
313
00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:06,564
Uh, ask her
if we can come inside.
314
00:10:06,647 --> 00:10:08,190
Let us in the goddamn house!
315
00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:09,775
Get the bait
and let's go!
Get the bait
and let's go!
316
00:10:09,859 --> 00:10:11,110
Aha!
So I'm bait?
317
00:10:11,193 --> 00:10:12,403
Just let us inside!
318
00:10:12,486 --> 00:10:13,904
-Stop! Stop!
-Open the garage, at least!
-Stop! Stop!
-Open the garage, at least!
319
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:15,406
We're exposed out here!
320
00:10:15,489 --> 00:10:16,741
[ Screeching ]
[ Gunshots ]
321
00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:18,659
Well, maybe if you
suck in real hard,
322
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:20,536
you can squeeze
inside the mailbox.
323
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,289
[ Laughs ]
-You bitch!
I'm gonna come back here
[ Laughs ]
-You bitch!
I'm gonna come back here
324
00:10:23,372 --> 00:10:25,124
and burn your
goddamn house down!
and burn your
goddamn house down!
325
00:10:25,207 --> 00:10:26,959
[ Pounding on door ]
Emmett! That bitch is an addict!
326
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:28,544
She'll take you
for all you've got!
327
00:10:28,627 --> 00:10:29,837
[ Screeching ]
Both: Aah!
[ Screeching ]
Both: Aah!
328
00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:33,924
[ Gunshots ]
[ Gunshots ]
329
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:38,471
[ Wings flapping ]
330
00:10:38,554 --> 00:10:40,097
[ Scoff ]
This is pathetic.
331
00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:42,058
You need to man up, son.
You need to man up, son.
332
00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:43,392
Hoot hoot, little bitch!
333
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:44,268
Aah!
334
00:10:44,352 --> 00:10:45,853
Early, he's right.
Early, he's right.
335
00:10:45,936 --> 00:10:48,939
Look, we've talked to every
squid in my Rolodex.
Look, we've talked to every
squid in my Rolodex.
336
00:10:49,023 --> 00:10:51,359
I guess the only thing
left to do is
337
00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:53,277
let me build a dome
over the county?
let me build a dome
over the county?
338
00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:55,613
Or,we could live
beneath the soil,
339
00:10:55,696 --> 00:10:58,199
as a race of mole people.
as a race of mole people.
340
00:10:58,282 --> 00:10:59,575
[ Crying ]
Why are we doing this?!
341
00:10:59,658 --> 00:11:01,369
-Don't fidget.
-The dome would've brought
-Don't fidget.
-The dome would've brought
342
00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:02,912
good jobs to this region!
343
00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:04,830
So would the mole tunnels!
So would the mole tunnels!
344
00:11:04,914 --> 00:11:06,916
[ Echoing ]
Mole tunnels!Mole tunnels!
345
00:11:06,999 --> 00:11:08,250
[ Screeching ]
346
00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:10,878
♪♪
♪♪
347
00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:14,423
[ Fabric rubbing ]
348
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:19,428
♪♪
♪♪
349
00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:22,098
It is too damn hot
for corduroys!
It is too damn hot
for corduroys!
350
00:11:22,181 --> 00:11:23,432
Anastasia:
Continue to strut.
351
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,559
Keep rubbing
them thighs together.
Keep rubbing
them thighs together.
352
00:11:25,643 --> 00:11:27,269
The noise will attract
the owl.
353
00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,939
And put the mouse necklace
back on.
And put the mouse necklace
back on.
354
00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:31,732
[ Laughs ]
It tickles.
355
00:11:31,816 --> 00:11:32,942
It keeps crawling off!
It keeps crawling off!
356
00:11:33,025 --> 00:11:35,277
He ain't gonna last
much longer.
357
00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:36,487
We just need to get her
close enough
We just need to get her
close enough
358
00:11:36,570 --> 00:11:38,030
to hit her
with a tracking dart.
359
00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:40,491
And we can follow her
in the chopper after that.
And we can follow her
in the chopper after that.
360
00:11:40,574 --> 00:11:42,576
Are you certified
to fly that thing?
361
00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:43,953
I've watched a video.
362
00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:47,123
I need to take a bio break.
Can I take five?
I need to take a bio break.
Can I take five?
363
00:11:47,206 --> 00:11:48,958
My neck
is killing me, here.
My neck
is killing me, here.
364
00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:51,043
Okay, fine, but make it quick.
365
00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,045
[ Leaves rustling ]
[ Leaves rustling ]
366
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:54,130
[ Pulley zipping ]
367
00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:55,714
[ Belt buckle clinking ]
368
00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:56,924
Can I get your phone
and play
Can I get your phone
and play
369
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,175
that candy gem game --
370
00:11:58,259 --> 00:12:00,094
"Bejazzled"? "Bejimboed"?
371
00:12:00,177 --> 00:12:01,429
Denny, give him your phone.
372
00:12:01,512 --> 00:12:02,471
Why my phone?
373
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:03,639
He's in the bathroom.
374
00:12:03,722 --> 00:12:05,850
'Cause you got
the ad-free version.
'Cause you got
the ad-free version.
375
00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,143
[ Echoing ]
That's right.
I can't go
376
00:12:07,226 --> 00:12:08,227
if I'm playing
"Bejimbo Light."
if I'm playing
"Bejimbo Light."
377
00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:09,437
♪♪
Alright. Don't grab it
378
00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:10,688
with the hand
you wipe with.
379
00:12:10,771 --> 00:12:12,982
I don't have a set
wiping hand, per se.
I don't have a set
wiping hand, per se.
380
00:12:13,065 --> 00:12:14,400
It's more of a rotation.
381
00:12:14,483 --> 00:12:16,735
[ Splash ]
Aah! I dropped it!
[ Splash ]
Aah! I dropped it!
382
00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:19,196
Oh, dang it!
Come on, now!
383
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:20,823
Oh, no!
Denny, look out!
Oh, no!
Denny, look out!
384
00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:21,866
-[ Screeching ]
-Aah!
385
00:12:21,949 --> 00:12:23,159
Dammit!
386
00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:24,243
Denny & Early:
Aah!
Denny & Early:
Aah!
387
00:12:24,326 --> 00:12:25,661
Come on, come on,
come on!
388
00:12:25,744 --> 00:12:27,788
All:
Aaaah!
389
00:12:27,872 --> 00:12:28,914
[ Fires ]
Aah!
[ Fires ]
Aah!
390
00:12:28,998 --> 00:12:30,166
Denny:
Aaaaah!
391
00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:31,959
Aaaaaaah!
392
00:12:32,042 --> 00:12:34,420
Oof!
Get in the chopper!
Oof!
Get in the chopper!
393
00:12:34,503 --> 00:12:36,839
-Aah!
-Get out of the chopper!
-Aah!
-Get out of the chopper!
394
00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,257
[ Explosion ]
395
00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,467
[ Flames crackling ]
396
00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:40,468
To the car!
To the car!
397
00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:42,386
I drive that way better!
398
00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:44,638
[ Siren wailing ]
[ Owl screeching ]
[ Siren wailing ]
[ Owl screeching ]
399
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:47,933
♪♪
400
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:48,893
Both:
[ Gasp ]
Both:
[ Gasp ]
401
00:12:48,976 --> 00:12:50,102
Aah!
402
00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:50,978
Move, move!
403
00:12:51,061 --> 00:12:52,521
Police coming through!
Police coming through!
404
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,774
That's right,
grab an apple.
405
00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:57,860
There's nothing to fear
because the giant owl,
There's nothing to fear
because the giant owl,
406
00:12:57,943 --> 00:12:59,361
[ Screeching ]
that's just a liberal --
407
00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:01,363
Holy shit!
Holy shit!
408
00:13:01,447 --> 00:13:04,033
-Sorry!
-No, not the corn maze!
409
00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:06,535
Now, any rural idiot
can solve it.
Now, any rural idiot
can solve it.
410
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:07,703
[ Siren wailing ]
[ Fires ]
411
00:13:07,786 --> 00:13:10,331
[ Screech ]
Dammit! She's so fast!
[ Screech ]
Dammit! She's so fast!
412
00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:11,916
She's headed
out over the lake.
413
00:13:11,999 --> 00:13:16,545
That fire-eyed, swivel-headed
son of a biscuit eater.
That fire-eyed, swivel-headed
son of a biscuit eater.
That fire-eyed, swivel-headed
son of a biscuit eater.
414
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:19,131
-Whoa!
-Hang on!
415
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:20,090
[ Fires ]
416
00:13:20,174 --> 00:13:21,926
-Aah!
-She's too far!
417
00:13:22,009 --> 00:13:24,595
-[ Screeching ]
-Help! Help me!
-[ Screeching ]
-Help! Help me!
418
00:13:24,678 --> 00:13:26,388
[ Asphyxiating ]
419
00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:28,265
[ Screeching ]
[ Screeching ]
420
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:29,558
Look, she's stuck.
421
00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:30,601
[ Tires screech ]
422
00:13:30,684 --> 00:13:32,978
Take the shot!
Take the shot!
423
00:13:33,062 --> 00:13:33,979
Take the shot!
424
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:36,148
Take the shot!
425
00:13:36,232 --> 00:13:37,525
Ah!
426
00:13:37,608 --> 00:13:41,028
Ow! Aaaaah!
Ow! Aaaaah!
427
00:13:41,111 --> 00:13:42,238
-Help me!
-Son of a bitch!
428
00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:43,113
We lost her!
429
00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:45,032
Maybe not.
Look at this.
Maybe not.
Look at this.
430
00:13:45,115 --> 00:13:46,075
[ Beeping ]
These are all
431
00:13:46,158 --> 00:13:48,077
Early's DUI bracelets.
432
00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:51,580
I track him so I can
bust him for another DUI.
I track him so I can
bust him for another DUI.
433
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:54,458
He's wearing
13 DUI bracelets?
He's wearing
13 DUI bracelets?
434
00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:56,794
Yeah, that's how many
DUIs he's got.
Yeah, that's how many
DUIs he's got.
435
00:13:56,877 --> 00:13:58,170
[ Clears throat ]
And ankles.
436
00:13:58,254 --> 00:13:59,672
Maybe you could've
told me that
437
00:13:59,755 --> 00:14:01,382
before we risked our lives
before we risked our lives
438
00:14:01,465 --> 00:14:03,592
getting a tracking
dart on her!
439
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:06,095
[ Beeping ]
Looks like they've stopped.
[ Beeping ]
Looks like they've stopped.
440
00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:07,513
My God.
441
00:14:07,596 --> 00:14:10,224
They're on the highest point
in Dougal County --
They're on the highest point
in Dougal County --
442
00:14:10,307 --> 00:14:12,268
Mount General Lee.
Mount General Lee.
443
00:14:12,351 --> 00:14:15,271
You know, that famous car
from "The Dukes of Hazzard."
444
00:14:15,354 --> 00:14:17,064
Look!
There she is!
Look!
There she is!
445
00:14:17,147 --> 00:14:19,525
[ Screeching ]
446
00:14:19,608 --> 00:14:21,402
Alright,
let's get up there.
Alright,
let's get up there.
447
00:14:21,485 --> 00:14:22,820
Shouldn't we get
your deputy, first?
448
00:14:22,903 --> 00:14:24,572
[ Splashing ]
Denny: I can't swim!
[ Splashing ]
Denny: I can't swim!
449
00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:25,573
Come get me!
450
00:14:25,656 --> 00:14:27,783
I can't swim!
Aah!
451
00:14:29,910 --> 00:14:31,370
Aw, he'll be fine.
452
00:14:31,453 --> 00:14:33,706
That's how my daddy
taught me how to swim.
That's how my daddy
taught me how to swim.
453
00:14:33,789 --> 00:14:35,416
So, your dad shot you
with a tracking dart
454
00:14:35,499 --> 00:14:38,210
and dropped you 100 feet
into a reservoir?
and dropped you 100 feet
into a reservoir?
455
00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:40,212
Well, it was a different
time, you know.
Well, it was a different
time, you know.
456
00:14:40,296 --> 00:14:42,631
Stop talking!
I'm drowning down here!
457
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:43,882
Help!
458
00:14:43,966 --> 00:14:45,384
[ Sigh ]
Alright.
[ Sigh ]
Alright.
459
00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:47,970
Hup.
460
00:14:48,053 --> 00:14:49,722
[ Splash ]
[ Splash ]
461
00:14:49,805 --> 00:14:50,973
[ Wind whipping ]
462
00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:54,310
[ Screeching in distance ]
[ Screeching in distance ]
463
00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:58,772
Hey! Ain't that
our shithouse?
Hey! Ain't that
our shithouse?
464
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,025
[ Creaking ]
[ Creaking ]
465
00:15:01,108 --> 00:15:02,735
Daddy?
You came to save us!
466
00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:03,986
-Thank goodness!
-We're saved!
467
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:04,820
[ Lock clicks ]
[ Lock clicks ]
468
00:15:04,903 --> 00:15:05,821
Daddy, let us in.
469
00:15:05,904 --> 00:15:06,905
Occupied!
470
00:15:06,989 --> 00:15:09,491
Oh, you want
to play games, huh?
Oh, you want
to play games, huh?
471
00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:10,326
Flip it.
472
00:15:10,409 --> 00:15:11,910
-[ Grunting ]
-No!
473
00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:12,745
No, okay!
No, okay!
474
00:15:12,828 --> 00:15:14,288
Fine, stop, okay?
475
00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:16,332
I'll let you in!
I'll let you in!
476
00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:17,666
Anastasia:
The nest is up there.
477
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:20,127
Now, we just gotta
climb the tower.
478
00:15:20,210 --> 00:15:21,211
Hold on, guys.
479
00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:23,255
I'm gonna slide
across the hood.
480
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:26,008
[ Laughs ] Just like them
dang-blasted Duke boys.
[ Laughs ] Just like them
dang-blasted Duke boys.
481
00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:27,468
-No, no, no, don't --
-Yeehoo!
482
00:15:27,551 --> 00:15:28,552
Ha! Oh, no!
Ha! Oh, no!
483
00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:29,720
Ah ah ah!
484
00:15:29,803 --> 00:15:30,804
Somebody grab me!
485
00:15:30,888 --> 00:15:32,014
Aaaaaaah!
486
00:15:32,097 --> 00:15:34,224
[ Bones crack ]
Oh!
[ Bones crack ]
Oh!
487
00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:35,559
♪♪
488
00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:38,437
Alright, I'm just gonna walk
down, this time.
Alright, I'm just gonna walk
down, this time.
489
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,314
H-Hold my hand,
will you, Denny?
H-Hold my hand,
will you, Denny?
490
00:15:40,397 --> 00:15:41,523
♪♪
491
00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:43,942
Man, this 5G radiation
492
00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:45,527
must be why she's so big.
must be why she's so big.
493
00:15:45,611 --> 00:15:46,820
Will it make me bigger?
494
00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:48,197
Sorry, big guy.
Sorry, big guy.
495
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:49,948
[ Laughs ]
I'm sorry
496
00:15:50,032 --> 00:15:51,533
I even called you
big guy.
497
00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:52,868
Everyone knows you're not.
Everyone knows you're not.
498
00:15:52,951 --> 00:15:55,204
Uh, size
isn't everything,
499
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:57,247
but it is more important
than intelligence.
but it is more important
than intelligence.
500
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:58,999
Stop farting, man.
I'm climbing
501
00:15:59,083 --> 00:15:59,958
right through it!
502
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:01,251
Sorry, Denny.
[ Laughs ]
Sorry, Denny.
[ Laughs ]
503
00:16:01,335 --> 00:16:04,046
I bet farts smell worse
for tiny people.
504
00:16:04,129 --> 00:16:05,214
It's probably
'cause your lungs
It's probably
'cause your lungs
505
00:16:05,297 --> 00:16:06,965
are so small,
they can't --
506
00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:07,841
What are you doing?
507
00:16:07,925 --> 00:16:09,802
If this bird likes 5G,
If this bird likes 5G,
508
00:16:09,885 --> 00:16:11,220
maybe she'll like 4C,
509
00:16:11,303 --> 00:16:12,930
as in C-4,
as in C-4,
510
00:16:13,013 --> 00:16:15,140
military-grade explosives.
[ Beeping ]
511
00:16:15,224 --> 00:16:16,809
Denny, no! [ Click ]
You're just gonna
Denny, no! [ Click ]
You're just gonna
512
00:16:16,892 --> 00:16:18,394
blow the tower up,
with us on it?
513
00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:20,145
I guess the brains
are smaller
514
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:21,355
on tiny people, too.
515
00:16:21,438 --> 00:16:23,774
I do not negotiate
with owls.
516
00:16:23,857 --> 00:16:25,734
Keep your powder dry,
little man.
Keep your powder dry,
little man.
517
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:27,444
I've got a couple
of surprises
518
00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:29,196
for Mr. Owl up there.
for Mr. Owl up there.
519
00:16:29,279 --> 00:16:30,572
That's Miss Owl.
520
00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:33,575
[ Laughs ] I ain't
about to miss no owl,
[ Laughs ] I ain't
about to miss no owl,
521
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,035
when I get him
in my crosshairs.
522
00:16:35,119 --> 00:16:37,746
It's a female!
It's a female!
523
00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:39,331
I guess, now,
we have to have
524
00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:40,582
pronouns for birds.
pronouns for birds.
525
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:42,084
That's not really
a pronoun.
526
00:16:42,167 --> 00:16:43,752
It's more of an adjective --
You shut your tiny,
527
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,003
little mouth, Denny!
little mouth, Denny!
528
00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:47,589
[ Creaks ]
529
00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:50,092
[ Hooting ]
[ Hooting ]
530
00:16:50,175 --> 00:16:51,510
Come on, now!
Stop pushing!
531
00:16:51,593 --> 00:16:52,761
Daddy, what --
what are you doing?
Daddy, what --
what are you doing?
532
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:53,971
Ow!
-I'm more comfortable back here,
533
00:16:54,054 --> 00:16:55,431
[ Grunts ]
away from the door.
534
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:56,598
When you come in last,
When you come in last,
535
00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:58,183
you should be closest
to the door.
536
00:16:58,267 --> 00:16:59,601
Daddy, I don't wanna be
closer to the door
537
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:00,686
and get ate by no owl.
and get ate by no owl.
538
00:17:00,769 --> 00:17:02,020
I got a long life
ahead of me.
539
00:17:02,104 --> 00:17:03,480
Well, I'm not gonna
give up my seat
540
00:17:03,564 --> 00:17:05,023
in the back
of the toilet,
in the back
of the toilet,
541
00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:07,192
in honor
of Ms. Rosa Parks.
542
00:17:07,276 --> 00:17:08,944
Aw, man,
don't pull the race card here.
Aw, man,
don't pull the race card here.
543
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,612
Don't you wanna be
closest to the exit,
544
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,448
if the owl attacks?
if the owl attacks?
545
00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:13,782
Daddy, get
out of the toilet.
546
00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:15,159
Yeah, get
out of the toilet.
547
00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:16,618
We want in the toilet.
We want in the toilet.
548
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:18,162
[ Echoing ]
Oh, I see.
549
00:17:18,245 --> 00:17:20,122
Women and children first,
until we're lining up
550
00:17:20,205 --> 00:17:22,166
to get eaten by that big-ass,
giant-ass owl,
551
00:17:22,249 --> 00:17:23,417
then, you got no problem
[ Splash ]
552
00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:24,793
with the patriarchy, huh?
♪♪
with the patriarchy, huh?
♪♪
553
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:26,170
Daddy, you playing
"Bejimbo" down there?
554
00:17:26,253 --> 00:17:27,588
I'm on the phone!
555
00:17:27,671 --> 00:17:29,548
Oh, thank God
they're alive.
Oh, thank God
they're alive.
556
00:17:29,631 --> 00:17:30,966
[ Knocking ]
Early?
557
00:17:31,049 --> 00:17:32,760
I said I'm on the phone!
I said I'm on the phone!
558
00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:34,052
Sheriff, is that you?
559
00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:35,554
Y'all just stay calm.
560
00:17:35,637 --> 00:17:37,473
Law enforcement's on the scene.
Law enforcement's on the scene.
561
00:17:37,556 --> 00:17:39,683
We're gonna create
a tear gas perimeter,
562
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:42,770
taser these eggs,
and torch this whole nest.
taser these eggs,
and torch this whole nest.
563
00:17:42,853 --> 00:17:44,772
No! We have
to take her alive.
No! We have
to take her alive.
564
00:17:44,855 --> 00:17:46,231
But we got all this stuff.
565
00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:47,357
Why can't we just use it?
566
00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:49,818
We do not negotiate
with owls!
We do not negotiate
with owls!
567
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:51,653
Now, put these on.
It'll allow you
568
00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:53,781
to get close
without scaring her.
to get close
without scaring her.
569
00:17:53,864 --> 00:17:56,950
S-S-So,
I'm a big-ass garden gnome?
S-S-So,
I'm a big-ass garden gnome?
570
00:17:57,034 --> 00:17:58,494
Shh!
That's right.
571
00:17:58,577 --> 00:18:01,663
Now, get in there
and approach the bird.
Now, get in there
and approach the bird.
572
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:03,707
Inch closer.
573
00:18:03,791 --> 00:18:05,751
Ever so closer.
Ever so closer.
574
00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:08,003
Maintaining your smile.
575
00:18:08,086 --> 00:18:09,421
You're building
trust here.
You're building
trust here.
576
00:18:09,505 --> 00:18:11,507
Uh, what now?
577
00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:14,510
She's looking at me
real hard.
She's looking at me
real hard.
578
00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:15,844
Just relax.
579
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:17,346
Gaze into her eyes.
Gaze into her eyes.
580
00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:19,848
[ Tranquil tune plays ]
Make the connection.
581
00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:22,893
[ Page turns ]
"The gnome approacheth
owly crest,
[ Page turns ]
"The gnome approacheth
owly crest,
582
00:18:22,976 --> 00:18:25,979
where upon thy beak,
gnome's lips be pressed.
where upon thy beak,
gnome's lips be pressed.
583
00:18:26,063 --> 00:18:28,941
Gnome's hands caress
thy owly chest
Gnome's hands caress
thy owly chest
584
00:18:29,024 --> 00:18:31,568
and bring this brutal
beast to rest."
585
00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:32,528
Wait, you want me
[ Music stops ]
Wait, you want me
[ Music stops ]
586
00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:33,862
to kiss this owl
587
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:35,072
and feel it up,
588
00:18:35,155 --> 00:18:36,490
without consent?
without consent?
589
00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:38,700
You heard the poem.
The words have been spoken.
590
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:40,577
I don't think I'm comfortable
with that.
I don't think I'm comfortable
with that.
591
00:18:40,661 --> 00:18:43,789
♪♪
"The portly gnome replied,
'You jest.
592
00:18:43,872 --> 00:18:46,083
I shall not wear
this dumb gnome dress
I shall not wear
this dumb gnome dress
593
00:18:46,166 --> 00:18:48,627
or press my lips
to owl crest.
or press my lips
to owl crest.
594
00:18:48,710 --> 00:18:50,379
You've sent me
on a foolish quest.'"
595
00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:51,588
Wait, so you knew
596
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,423
I wouldn't kiss the owl.
[ Music stops ]
I wouldn't kiss the owl.
[ Music stops ]
597
00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:55,008
Ain't no woman gonna tell me
598
00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:56,844
what I wasn't about to do.
what I wasn't about to do.
599
00:18:56,927 --> 00:18:58,554
Mwah!
600
00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:00,180
[ Laughs ]
That ain't so bad.
[ Laughs ]
That ain't so bad.
601
00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:01,431
-[ Screeching ]
-Uh!
602
00:19:01,515 --> 00:19:02,850
Okay, it didn't work.
603
00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:04,768
Uh, I don't think you
kissed her deep enough.
Uh, I don't think you
kissed her deep enough.
604
00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:05,978
Try kissing her again.
605
00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:07,729
Ain't you supposed to be
a bird expert?
606
00:19:07,813 --> 00:19:10,440
Yeah, University of Georgia,
with the Herschel Walker?
Yeah, University of Georgia,
with the Herschel Walker?
607
00:19:10,524 --> 00:19:11,733
I never said that!
608
00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,485
I'm in the creative
writing department.
I'm in the creative
writing department.
609
00:19:13,569 --> 00:19:14,695
Well, what's that book, then?
610
00:19:14,778 --> 00:19:16,029
Oh, this is
my self-published
611
00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:17,364
YA fantasy novel.
YA fantasy novel.
612
00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:18,824
Shit! Denny, shoot the owl!
613
00:19:18,907 --> 00:19:20,325
[ Static crackles ]
Sorry, big guy.
[ Static crackles ]
Sorry, big guy.
614
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:21,243
-[ Screech ]
-Owww!
615
00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:22,411
I bailed as soon as she
616
00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:24,204
had you dress up
like a gnome.
had you dress up
like a gnome.
617
00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:25,372
[ Suspenseful music plays ]
Y'all gonna die.
618
00:19:25,455 --> 00:19:26,415
Aah!
619
00:19:26,498 --> 00:19:28,166
Then who's that Denny?
620
00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:29,585
He's made of C-4,
621
00:19:29,668 --> 00:19:31,587
and his name is
Officer Boom-Boom.
622
00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:33,297
Let's get the hell outta here.
Get, get, get, get.
Let's get the hell outta here.
Get, get, get, get.
623
00:19:33,380 --> 00:19:35,424
Early, help, please!
624
00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:36,425
♪♪
♪♪
625
00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:37,426
You're about to find out
626
00:19:37,509 --> 00:19:39,177
for hoo-hoo the bell tolls,
627
00:19:39,261 --> 00:19:41,680
[ Beeping ]
you featherheaded bitch!
[ Beeping ]
you featherheaded bitch!
628
00:19:41,763 --> 00:19:42,681
Oh!
629
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:43,640
[ Screeching ]
630
00:19:43,724 --> 00:19:44,975
Uhh. It's "whom."
Uhh. It's "whom."
631
00:19:45,058 --> 00:19:46,351
"Whom," Early.
Ohhh.
632
00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:47,686
Whom the hell
do you think you are...
633
00:19:47,769 --> 00:19:50,105
-Wait -- aaaaah!
-questioning my grammar?
-Wait -- aaaaah!
-questioning my grammar?
634
00:19:50,188 --> 00:19:52,357
[ Beeping ]
[ Beeping ]
635
00:19:52,441 --> 00:19:53,942
[ Screeching ]
636
00:19:54,026 --> 00:19:55,068
[ Beeping ]
637
00:19:55,152 --> 00:19:56,194
♪♪
♪♪
638
00:19:56,278 --> 00:19:58,614
[ Explosion ]
639
00:19:58,697 --> 00:20:01,742
[ Flames crackling ]
[ Flames crackling ]
640
00:20:01,825 --> 00:20:03,619
No!
641
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:06,121
♪♪
"Miss Evertree exclaimed.
♪♪
"Miss Evertree exclaimed.
642
00:20:06,204 --> 00:20:08,916
The spineless gnome
was all to blame."
The spineless gnome
was all to blame."
643
00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,292
"Early Cuyler be the name
644
00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:12,961
who blowed up that owl
into red-hot flame."
who blowed up that owl
into red-hot flame."
645
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:15,589
Put that
in your stupid book.
646
00:20:15,672 --> 00:20:16,465
♪♪
♪♪
647
00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:17,466
Hey, y'all.
648
00:20:17,549 --> 00:20:19,551
Anastasia sent us
her new book,
649
00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:23,430
"The Bewitching Owl:
Sorcery of the Cephalopod."
"The Bewitching Owl:
Sorcery of the Cephalopod."
650
00:20:23,513 --> 00:20:24,765
Look, Daddy,
you're in a book!
Look, Daddy,
you're in a book!
651
00:20:24,848 --> 00:20:26,767
I judge this book
by its cover.
652
00:20:26,850 --> 00:20:27,851
It's very good!
653
00:20:27,935 --> 00:20:29,561
A real page-burner.
A real page-burner.
654
00:20:29,645 --> 00:20:31,438
Here, put this
in the burn pile.
655
00:20:31,521 --> 00:20:32,439
Damn straight.
Damn straight.
656
00:20:32,522 --> 00:20:33,398
My daddy wrote the book
657
00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:34,566
on not reading books.
658
00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:36,401
Uh, yeah, well.
Uh, yeah, well.
659
00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:38,445
She also made us
these dreamcatchers.
660
00:20:38,528 --> 00:20:39,821
Now, don't burn these.
661
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:40,989
She spent some time
on them.
She spent some time
on them.
662
00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:42,324
I already caught my dream
663
00:20:42,407 --> 00:20:43,825
and killed it and, now,
664
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:45,744
I've got another feather
in my cap.
I've got another feather
in my cap.
665
00:20:45,827 --> 00:20:49,081
You tell the town they can
resume apple-picking season,
You tell the town they can
resume apple-picking season,
666
00:20:49,164 --> 00:20:50,999
courtesy of Curly Tuyler.
667
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:52,584
Yeah, I'm afraid
the governor
Yeah, I'm afraid
the governor
668
00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:55,754
opened apple-pickin' season
a bit prematurely.
669
00:20:55,837 --> 00:20:58,340
[ Screaming ]
We will remain open!
[ Screaming ]
We will remain open!
670
00:20:58,423 --> 00:21:00,384
The cure cannot be worse
The cure cannot be worse
671
00:21:00,467 --> 00:21:02,010
than the --
Don't pick me up!
672
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,096
[ Hooting ]
Yeah!
673
00:21:04,179 --> 00:21:05,973
We really should've
torched them eggs.
674
00:21:06,056 --> 00:21:08,725
I said tase the eggs.
I said it on the day.
I said tase the eggs.
I said it on the day.
675
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:10,811
I mean, hell, what's the
point of building a dome,
676
00:21:10,894 --> 00:21:13,230
if you're gonna let owl
eggs hatch inside of it?
if you're gonna let owl
eggs hatch inside of it?
677
00:21:13,313 --> 00:21:14,564
Give this to Granny,
will you?
678
00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:16,692
You can come on down
and give it to her yourself.
You can come on down
and give it to her yourself.
679
00:21:16,775 --> 00:21:17,776
Well, where is she?
680
00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:18,819
We drained the baby wipes
681
00:21:18,902 --> 00:21:20,112
out of the septic hole.
682
00:21:20,195 --> 00:21:21,321
We live down here now.
683
00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:22,406
Oh, uh.
684
00:21:22,489 --> 00:21:24,533
Is that, uh,
where your outhouse was?
Is that, uh,
where your outhouse was?
685
00:21:24,616 --> 00:21:26,326
Turned it
into a man cave.
686
00:21:26,410 --> 00:21:28,453
Come on down.
Let me give you the tour.
Come on down.
Let me give you the tour.
687
00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:30,706
Uh, no thank you.
688
00:21:30,789 --> 00:21:32,040
[ Engine starts ]
Y'all stay safe now.
689
00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:34,376
[ Radio chatter ]
[ Radio chatter ]
690
00:21:35,544 --> 00:21:38,213
-They're coming.
Back up, back up, back up!
-I'm in control, Denny.
-They're coming.
Back up, back up, back up!
-I'm in control, Denny.
691
00:21:38,296 --> 00:21:40,966
-[ Hooting, screeching ]
-I know what the hell I'm doing.
-[ Hooting, screeching ]
-I know what the hell I'm doing.
692
00:21:41,049 --> 00:21:44,052
You think we could
keep this thing outside?
693
00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:46,805
I've been having trouble
sleeping lately
I've been having trouble
sleeping lately
694
00:21:46,888 --> 00:21:50,767
and I think maybe it's 'cause
the eyes keep following me.
and I think maybe it's 'cause
the eyes keep following me.
695
00:21:50,851 --> 00:21:53,061
Just chillax.
It's not even alive.
Just chillax.
It's not even alive.
696
00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:55,147
Rusty, take a picture
of me with this owl.
697
00:21:55,230 --> 00:21:57,399
Make it look like I'm
in trouble.
Make it look like I'm
in trouble.
698
00:21:57,482 --> 00:21:58,525
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
Alright.
699
00:21:58,608 --> 00:21:59,776
Now give me
the Tae Bo stick.
700
00:21:59,860 --> 00:22:00,902
Turn the camera sideways,
Turn the camera sideways,
701
00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:02,487
make it look like it's action.
702
00:22:02,571 --> 00:22:03,864
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
Now I'm gonna go
703
00:22:03,947 --> 00:22:04,906
back-to-back with it,
back-to-back with it,
704
00:22:04,990 --> 00:22:06,408
like we in a buddy cop movie.
705
00:22:06,491 --> 00:22:08,076
He's the pencil-pushing
rule follower,
706
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,328
I'm the crazy cop
with one foot out the door.
I'm the crazy cop
with one foot out the door.
707
00:22:10,412 --> 00:22:12,956
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
"I'm supposed
to retire tomorrow!"
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
"I'm supposed
to retire tomorrow!"
708
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:14,833
Now this one,
I'mma jump up and punch it.
709
00:22:14,916 --> 00:22:16,543
Make sure you catch me
in the air.
Make sure you catch me
in the air.
710
00:22:16,626 --> 00:22:18,295
1, 2,
711
00:22:18,378 --> 00:22:19,212
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
3!
712
00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:20,422
Come on, man!
Come on, man!
713
00:22:20,505 --> 00:22:22,340
You messed it up.
You gotta time it right!
714
00:22:22,424 --> 00:22:26,678
♪ Made in Georgia ♪
♪ Made in Georgia ♪
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