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DOWNLOADED FROM WWW.AWAFIM.TV
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[ominous classical music plays]
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00:00:12,396 --> 00:00:13,437
[grunts]
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00:00:13,521 --> 00:00:15,646
In your face, Captain Armorica!
5
00:00:15,729 --> 00:00:16,604
[grunts]
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00:00:16,687 --> 00:00:18,562
[laughs]
7
00:00:18,646 --> 00:00:22,062
Metadata, we've been walking
all night and I'm pooped!
8
00:00:22,146 --> 00:00:24,854
Come on, Potus.
One more attraction to check.
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00:00:24,937 --> 00:00:26,687
Oh, I can't do roller coasters.
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00:00:26,771 --> 00:00:29,437
The wind in my face dries out my sinuses.
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00:00:29,521 --> 00:00:30,854
Not my cuppa tea at all.
12
00:00:30,937 --> 00:00:34,312
-I like hook-a-duck or splat the rat.
-Oh, who cares? Come on, Potus!
13
00:00:34,396 --> 00:00:37,521
Oh, no, water! We'll end up soaking wet.
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[charming folkloric music plays]
15
00:00:39,354 --> 00:00:40,437
[sighs]
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00:00:41,896 --> 00:00:45,687
♪ It's a Roman world
No, Gallic it is not ♪
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00:00:45,771 --> 00:00:49,729
♪ Clap your hands, you must
Respect all of our laws ♪
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00:00:49,812 --> 00:00:53,979
♪ It's a Roman world
Not an Egyptian world ♪
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00:00:54,062 --> 00:00:57,771
♪ Nor Greek or African
It's just a world that's pure Roman ♪
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00:00:57,854 --> 00:01:01,896
♪ In this Roman world
Oh, wow, it is so nice ♪
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00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:05,771
♪ A wonderful world
No nothing can compare ♪
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00:01:05,854 --> 00:01:10,146
♪ If you don't like this
Then we will impose it ♪
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00:01:10,229 --> 00:01:13,937
♪ We'll throw you to the lions
If you cause rebellion ♪
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00:01:14,021 --> 00:01:17,937
♪ Bread and circuses
Yes, that is our motto ♪
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00:01:18,021 --> 00:01:21,979
♪ What the crowds all want
Is to have a good seat ♪
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00:01:22,062 --> 00:01:25,062
♪ It's a Roman world
Wherever… ♪
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This tune'll be stuck in my head all day.
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♪ There is nothing bad here
In this Roman world ♪
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ASTÉRIX & OBÉLIX: THE BIG FIGHT
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Hello, I am Hannabarbera.
31
00:01:34,687 --> 00:01:36,729
Hello, and I'm Blackangus.
32
00:01:36,812 --> 00:01:38,896
Welcome to the Big Fight, everyone!
33
00:01:38,979 --> 00:01:42,104
So, Blackangus,
who are the two fighters competing today?
34
00:01:42,187 --> 00:01:45,979
Well, Hannabarbera,
first we've the Gaul, Vitalstatistix.
35
00:01:46,062 --> 00:01:48,187
His strength is matched by his courage.
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He's the chief of the indomitables,
37
00:01:50,396 --> 00:01:54,396
and he intends to remain so
until the sky falls down on his head.
38
00:01:54,479 --> 00:01:55,312
[clangs]
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00:01:55,396 --> 00:01:57,812
And the sky might well be his challenger!
40
00:01:57,896 --> 00:02:01,562
Aye! He will face Cassius Ceramix,
the Gallo-Roman.
41
00:02:01,646 --> 00:02:06,187
And by that, I mean a Gaul
who recognizes the greatness of Rome.
42
00:02:06,271 --> 00:02:10,354
And whether it be in speed,
in impact, in strength,
43
00:02:10,437 --> 00:02:14,437
and, of course, in fealty to Rome,
he is our champion!
44
00:02:14,521 --> 00:02:17,312
It'll be a clash packed with action.
Won't it, Blackangus?
45
00:02:17,396 --> 00:02:19,229
Aye, Hannabarbera, it will.
46
00:02:19,312 --> 00:02:21,312
We expect to see violence,
47
00:02:21,396 --> 00:02:23,729
and savagery, and cruelty,
48
00:02:23,812 --> 00:02:26,812
as a lot of the public
have come here with their families!
49
00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:30,687
[woman on Tannoy] Little Romulus's waiting
for his parents near the wolves pen.
50
00:02:30,771 --> 00:02:32,687
Little Romulus, thank you.
51
00:02:35,646 --> 00:02:39,146
"So, at the end of the fight,
the chief who's vanquished
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00:02:39,229 --> 00:02:41,771
will submit control of his tribe
to the winner."
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00:02:41,854 --> 00:02:42,937
[all chatter nervously]
54
00:02:43,021 --> 00:02:45,979
No! I'll never submit to a Gallo-Roman.
55
00:02:46,062 --> 00:02:47,896
I know, but we're not there yet, are we?
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00:02:47,979 --> 00:02:49,312
We're not far from it.
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00:02:49,396 --> 00:02:51,646
Our druid's still lost
all sense of reason.
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00:02:51,729 --> 00:02:54,437
["You Never Can Tell"
by Chuck Berry plays]
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00:02:57,687 --> 00:03:01,062
And without magic potion,
you won't beat Cassius Ceramix.
60
00:03:01,146 --> 00:03:03,687
With a little bit of training
I don't see why I couldn't…
61
00:03:03,771 --> 00:03:06,729
You don't stand a chance at all!
Even I'd be a better option.
62
00:03:06,812 --> 00:03:09,104
-[scoffs]
-You may just have a point.
63
00:03:09,187 --> 00:03:11,104
Oh, come on, Pidiped,
you can't be serious.
64
00:03:11,187 --> 00:03:13,896
-With no stick, he'll fall down.
-You'll see if I fall down!
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00:03:13,979 --> 00:03:16,021
-Ow!
-No, no, he's got me thinking.
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00:03:16,104 --> 00:03:18,062
We should change our chief.
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00:03:18,146 --> 00:03:20,187
Huh? Change our chief?
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00:03:20,271 --> 00:03:24,854
Yes, 'cause to win the Big Fight
we need our strongest Gaul, Obelix.
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00:03:24,937 --> 00:03:27,229
[brash musical flourish plays]
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00:03:28,771 --> 00:03:30,937
But… are we allowed to do that?
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00:03:31,021 --> 00:03:33,187
-Where does it say? Hmm.
-There.
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00:03:34,146 --> 00:03:36,229
[Geriatrix] Oh, it's engraved
in small print.
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00:03:36,312 --> 00:03:38,854
"If need be,
the village chief can be replaced
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00:03:38,937 --> 00:03:41,729
by any member of the tribe
who is picked for the occasion."
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00:03:41,812 --> 00:03:45,771
-[all chatter approvingly]
-There you are! We can make Obelix chief.
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00:03:46,437 --> 00:03:48,021
What about me?
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00:03:48,104 --> 00:03:49,479
But what about you what?
78
00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:51,437
I don't see why you don't pick me.
79
00:03:51,521 --> 00:03:53,479
Because Obelix is the only one
who can win.
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00:03:53,562 --> 00:03:55,146
How many times we gotta say it?
81
00:03:55,229 --> 00:03:58,312
Do you honestly think
he's stronger than this, eh?
82
00:03:58,396 --> 00:04:01,312
-I do.
-We should let the people decide.
83
00:04:01,396 --> 00:04:04,687
My friends, name your blacksmith
chief of this village,
84
00:04:04,771 --> 00:04:07,437
and we'll regain
our strength and serenity.
85
00:04:07,521 --> 00:04:10,521
With me, Fulliautomatix, the quiet forge.
86
00:04:10,604 --> 00:04:12,062
No, no, that won't work!
87
00:04:12,146 --> 00:04:13,312
There you are, thank you.
88
00:04:13,396 --> 00:04:16,354
What this village needs
is someone who has experience.
89
00:04:16,437 --> 00:04:18,646
-Not at all!
-As the former chief of the village…
90
00:04:18,729 --> 00:04:22,354
Here we go! Same old wine
in a new bottle? No.
91
00:04:22,437 --> 00:04:26,187
Not on your nelly.
The Gauls want to see new faces.
92
00:04:26,271 --> 00:04:29,104
In that case, we might as well try
a brand-new face.
93
00:04:29,187 --> 00:04:31,521
-Like me, for example.
-I'm with you, sister.
94
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:34,312
No… Yes, I do agree.
But not now, dear, all right?
95
00:04:34,396 --> 00:04:35,979
Wait, wait, wait.
96
00:04:36,062 --> 00:04:39,812
Being the chief demands
a good relationship with the clientele.
97
00:04:39,896 --> 00:04:42,271
-Oh, no, because…
-And as a fishmonger…
98
00:04:42,354 --> 00:04:43,812
You're a poisoner, huh!
99
00:04:43,896 --> 00:04:47,104
Pick me, and I'll move his shop
to the neighbouring village!
100
00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:50,021
-Oh, yeah?
-Further from the sea. Will that do?
101
00:04:50,562 --> 00:04:51,646
[villagers] Ooh!
102
00:04:51,729 --> 00:04:53,479
-Wait, hold on! No!
-[grunting]
103
00:04:54,062 --> 00:04:55,896
-No, no, no!
-[Vitalstatistix] Gauls!
104
00:04:55,979 --> 00:04:57,479
-[all clamouring]
-[sighs]
105
00:05:00,812 --> 00:05:02,979
[Hannabarbera] So here we are, Blackangus!
106
00:05:03,062 --> 00:05:04,312
Oh, yes, absolutely.
107
00:05:04,396 --> 00:05:07,937
This battle will be ugly,
and the public expect it that way.
108
00:05:08,021 --> 00:05:09,687
You're not wrong, Blackangus.
109
00:05:09,771 --> 00:05:12,729
-Is it true you've had over 90 fights?
-I have indeed.
110
00:05:12,812 --> 00:05:16,562
Five wins of the Raeburn shield,
12 executions, so I'm an old hand.
111
00:05:16,646 --> 00:05:18,562
That's very rare for a gladiator, no?
112
00:05:18,646 --> 00:05:21,271
Ah, well!
That's what I always say to the kids.
113
00:05:21,354 --> 00:05:23,104
The hardest part is to carry on.
114
00:05:23,187 --> 00:05:25,021
-I have a little question for you.
-Aye?
115
00:05:25,104 --> 00:05:27,354
How does one feel before such a fight?
116
00:05:27,437 --> 00:05:31,104
Well, you gotta stay focused,
you gotta clear your head,
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00:05:31,187 --> 00:05:33,479
and above all, you keep calm.
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00:05:33,562 --> 00:05:35,312
[all clamouring]
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[grunting]
120
00:05:38,229 --> 00:05:39,312
-[clanging]
-[yelps]
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[chicken squawks angrily]
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00:05:40,937 --> 00:05:42,021
Excuse me?
123
00:05:44,229 --> 00:05:45,396
Excuse me!
124
00:05:45,479 --> 00:05:47,271
[all yelling]
125
00:05:48,396 --> 00:05:50,562
Er, sorry to bother you!
126
00:05:53,271 --> 00:05:54,896
I'm looking for your chief.
127
00:05:55,479 --> 00:05:57,854
-Our chief?
-For the Big Fight.
128
00:05:58,854 --> 00:06:00,646
Oh, yeah, the Big Fight, sure.
129
00:06:01,146 --> 00:06:01,979
One minute.
130
00:06:02,062 --> 00:06:05,479
No rush, take your time,
I'll wait by the chariot outside.
131
00:06:05,562 --> 00:06:06,729
Cheers, thanks a lot.
132
00:06:06,812 --> 00:06:09,771
-Just outside the village.
-[Vitalstatistix] Yeah.
133
00:06:11,146 --> 00:06:12,896
Children, my wife is right.
134
00:06:12,979 --> 00:06:15,562
So you know
the fishmonger's, the blacksmith's…
135
00:06:15,646 --> 00:06:18,729
-[Vitalstatistix] We know where you are.
-I'll wait just there.
136
00:06:18,812 --> 00:06:21,187
So, I was saying, Impedimenta's right.
137
00:06:21,271 --> 00:06:23,021
The future of the village is at stake.
138
00:06:23,104 --> 00:06:26,604
I agree to hand over the role
of chief to Obelix.
139
00:06:27,854 --> 00:06:29,937
Has anyone actually seen Obelix?
140
00:06:30,021 --> 00:06:32,479
-[Obelix] No.
-[Vitalstatistix] What do you mean, no?
141
00:06:32,562 --> 00:06:35,187
No, no, no. Asterix is right.
142
00:06:35,271 --> 00:06:38,729
I've done enough stupid things.
You deserve a better chief.
143
00:06:38,812 --> 00:06:41,771
No, Obelix.
It would be for the fight and no longer.
144
00:06:41,854 --> 00:06:43,187
No, no, no, no.
145
00:06:43,271 --> 00:06:45,187
I'm good for delivering menhirs.
146
00:06:45,271 --> 00:06:48,229
And that's all.
Huh. And I'm hopeless at that.
147
00:06:48,312 --> 00:06:50,812
[scoffs] Look, our chief isn't asking you,
148
00:06:50,896 --> 00:06:53,396
he's chosen you. So, you're our chief.
149
00:06:53,479 --> 00:06:54,437
Hmm?
150
00:06:55,396 --> 00:06:56,229
All right.
151
00:06:57,771 --> 00:06:58,646
Okay.
152
00:06:59,396 --> 00:07:00,479
All right, I accept.
153
00:07:00,562 --> 00:07:02,562
Ah! Thank you, Obelix.
154
00:07:02,646 --> 00:07:04,437
And as your chief,
155
00:07:04,521 --> 00:07:06,521
I name Asterix as our chief. There.
156
00:07:06,604 --> 00:07:07,812
Huh? Er, what?
157
00:07:07,896 --> 00:07:11,062
I'm your chief, I name you chief.
So you're chief, that's it.
158
00:07:11,146 --> 00:07:14,354
Oh, okay, I see.
Well, considering I'm your chief,
159
00:07:14,437 --> 00:07:15,937
I make you our chief. There.
160
00:07:16,021 --> 00:07:17,812
Hmm? And I'm reappointing you chief.
161
00:07:17,896 --> 00:07:20,062
-I re-reappoint you chief.
-No, you chief.
162
00:07:20,146 --> 00:07:21,521
-You chief! You!
-You chief.
163
00:07:21,604 --> 00:07:23,896
-Not allowed to reappoint.
-I'm one chief ahead.
164
00:07:23,979 --> 00:07:25,062
-You chief.
-You chief!
165
00:07:25,146 --> 00:07:27,646
-Chief! Chief! Chief!
-Chief! Chief! Chief!
166
00:07:27,729 --> 00:07:29,979
[both continue rapidly]
167
00:07:30,062 --> 00:07:32,604
Enough now! Stop acting like children.
168
00:07:32,687 --> 00:07:34,604
-He started it.
-He's such a liar.
169
00:07:34,687 --> 00:07:37,896
Obelix, our only hope is you.
170
00:07:37,979 --> 00:07:40,312
-You must agree to be chief.
-[exhales]
171
00:07:41,187 --> 00:07:45,521
Erm, can I open a wild boar shop,
for those people who don't like fish?
172
00:07:45,604 --> 00:07:47,312
Of course, you'd be the chief.
173
00:07:47,396 --> 00:07:49,312
But I won't have to make speeches, will I?
174
00:07:49,396 --> 00:07:51,896
You'll be chief.
You won't have to do anything.
175
00:07:51,979 --> 00:07:55,812
-Yes, but, will Asterix stop always…
-Finishing your sentences? Yes, Obelix.
176
00:07:57,021 --> 00:07:58,104
All right then, sure.
177
00:07:58,187 --> 00:08:01,854
[people chatter excitedly
and congratulate]
178
00:08:01,937 --> 00:08:03,937
[hopeful classical music plays]
179
00:08:06,979 --> 00:08:09,312
[grunts] There. I'm his trainer!
180
00:08:12,271 --> 00:08:15,437
[Obelix] Geriatrix, do you think
a wild boar shop is a good idea,
181
00:08:15,521 --> 00:08:17,187
as a first decision as chief?
182
00:08:17,271 --> 00:08:21,729
[Geriatrix] Eh, will you still do menhirs
and have a wild boar shop?
183
00:08:23,562 --> 00:08:25,771
[Blackangus] Well,
we're a few hourglasses away,
184
00:08:25,854 --> 00:08:29,521
or should I say, a few grains of sand away
from the beginning of the fight.
185
00:08:29,604 --> 00:08:31,896
The cheap seats are filling up
little by little.
186
00:08:31,979 --> 00:08:35,354
It's taking a while but I can feel it
in my bones that this is going to be…
187
00:08:35,437 --> 00:08:38,937
Hold on, Blackangus, I see a VIP
heading towards the red mosaic right now!
188
00:08:39,021 --> 00:08:40,937
["Whatta Man" by Salt-N-Pepa plays]
189
00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:42,479
[Blackangus] Aye, it's him!
190
00:08:42,562 --> 00:08:44,604
-[crowd cheers]
-[woman 1] Caesar!
191
00:08:44,687 --> 00:08:46,771
-[man 1] Caesar!
-[woman 2] I love you, Caesar!
192
00:08:47,729 --> 00:08:49,312
[man 2] I wanna be you!
193
00:08:51,646 --> 00:08:53,854
[Blackangus] Oh, what a handsome man!
194
00:08:58,729 --> 00:09:00,021
-There?
-Caesar!
195
00:09:00,104 --> 00:09:01,896
-Give a smile, Caesar!
-Hey, Mr. Caesar!
196
00:09:01,979 --> 00:09:03,937
-This way, this way!
-Give us a smile!
197
00:09:04,021 --> 00:09:06,312
[clicking rapidly]
198
00:09:06,396 --> 00:09:08,646
-Oh, yeah!
-Very noble.
199
00:09:08,729 --> 00:09:10,937
[paparazzo] One can see
why he's wearing laurels.
200
00:09:11,021 --> 00:09:13,146
-Simply marvellous!
-[man] Lovely!
201
00:09:13,229 --> 00:09:17,562
Not that I want to grovel at all,
but he's still extremely sculpturogenic.
202
00:09:18,896 --> 00:09:20,854
But you are kind of grovelling.
203
00:09:20,937 --> 00:09:23,146
Well, you're not wrong. You're not wrong.
204
00:09:23,771 --> 00:09:24,979
[paparazzo] Over here!
205
00:09:25,062 --> 00:09:27,104
Okay, thank you, but that's enough now.
206
00:09:27,187 --> 00:09:28,396
Julius, just one more!
207
00:09:28,479 --> 00:09:30,896
No, no more. You've had quite enough.
Julius, come on.
208
00:09:30,979 --> 00:09:32,646
[all sigh sadly]
209
00:09:32,729 --> 00:09:34,104
It's impossible to work.
210
00:09:34,187 --> 00:09:36,229
Look, look, look.
There! Look, she's coming!
211
00:09:36,312 --> 00:09:39,271
-Is it someone important?
-Of course, it is! Look, it's her.
212
00:09:39,354 --> 00:09:41,479
[woman] Cleopatra, this way please!
213
00:09:41,562 --> 00:09:42,937
Over here, Cleopatra!
214
00:09:43,021 --> 00:09:45,562
-[man 1] Look this way!
-[man 2] Can you face us as well?
215
00:09:46,604 --> 00:09:48,604
[man 3] Not just the profile,
if you please.
216
00:09:49,854 --> 00:09:50,979
This way, please.
217
00:09:51,562 --> 00:09:54,729
The referee, Twinpix, is waiting
for you inside.
218
00:09:54,812 --> 00:09:56,062
For the weigh-in.
219
00:09:57,396 --> 00:10:01,354
Okay then,
now, you can step on the scales.
220
00:10:03,854 --> 00:10:05,021
[Dogmatix whines]
221
00:10:06,229 --> 00:10:08,562
So, you're a heavyweight then.
222
00:10:08,646 --> 00:10:09,562
Really?
223
00:10:09,646 --> 00:10:10,979
And without Dogmatix?
224
00:10:11,062 --> 00:10:12,104
[panting]
225
00:10:12,812 --> 00:10:14,646
[adventurous music plays]
226
00:10:14,729 --> 00:10:17,146
[Blackangus] Oh, look, er… Barbera!
227
00:10:17,229 --> 00:10:19,979
The Gallic tribe is arriving
to see the big feat.
228
00:10:20,062 --> 00:10:22,437
And if I may add, their de-feat.
229
00:10:22,521 --> 00:10:25,021
-[both laugh]
-[Blackangus] That's funny.
230
00:10:30,896 --> 00:10:33,104
[lively classical music plays]
231
00:10:33,729 --> 00:10:36,771
[vendor 1] Kiddywinks!
Who wants a candy-floss moustache?
232
00:10:36,854 --> 00:10:39,354
It's full of sugar.
It's good for children.
233
00:10:42,146 --> 00:10:45,854
[vendor 2] Roll up, roll up,
hop in the bumper chariots!
234
00:10:45,937 --> 00:10:47,854
So if Cassius Ceramix wins today,
235
00:10:47,937 --> 00:10:50,146
it would see the conquest
of all Gaul by Caesar!
236
00:10:50,229 --> 00:10:53,979
Absolutely. So we expect to see
a fight fought with no mercy.
237
00:10:54,062 --> 00:10:55,604
And the sweet smell of triumph.
238
00:10:55,687 --> 00:10:58,396
Oh, well, er… [laughs]
I can't smell nothing.
239
00:10:58,479 --> 00:11:00,937
Not since the day
that I shoved a trident up my nose.
240
00:11:01,021 --> 00:11:04,354
Can't smell a thing.
Anyway, enough about me. [snorts]
241
00:11:05,937 --> 00:11:08,979
[vendor 3] Omen chicken!
Who wants an omen chicken?
242
00:11:09,062 --> 00:11:12,062
Yesterday's chickens tell
the news of tomorrow.
243
00:11:12,146 --> 00:11:13,312
Omen chicken,
244
00:11:13,396 --> 00:11:15,979
with the chick supplement special
on property,
245
00:11:16,062 --> 00:11:17,771
"Should I invest in Pompeii?"
246
00:11:17,854 --> 00:11:19,771
Of course, you should invest in Pompeii.
247
00:11:19,854 --> 00:11:23,687
If I could afford it, I'd get a little hut
right at the foot of the volcano.
248
00:11:23,771 --> 00:11:26,771
You wouldn't see me for dust.
It'd be a sound investment.
249
00:11:26,854 --> 00:11:28,854
I may be wrong, but I doubt it.
250
00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:40,396
Oh, what truly dreadful seats.
They are so uncomfortable.
251
00:11:40,896 --> 00:11:45,104
This is the worst birthday of my life.
Pompey wouldn't do this to his mother.
252
00:11:45,187 --> 00:11:46,146
[Caesar grumbles]
253
00:11:46,229 --> 00:11:47,771
[laughs] Here's another one.
254
00:11:47,854 --> 00:11:51,146
How do you tell the difference
between a Gaul and his wife?
255
00:11:51,229 --> 00:11:53,479
The length of their moustache! [laughs]
256
00:11:55,146 --> 00:11:57,271
And so for the rest of the program,
257
00:11:57,354 --> 00:12:00,062
after the loser hands
the shield to the winner,
258
00:12:00,146 --> 00:12:03,146
we thought we could dine tonight
in the Gaulish village.
259
00:12:03,229 --> 00:12:06,937
Really? My birthday dinner
in a village in Gaul? Charming.
260
00:12:07,021 --> 00:12:10,979
Oh, yeah! And the menu is Gallo-Roman.
Thought we'd go fusion. Yeah?
261
00:12:11,062 --> 00:12:14,104
What's fusion?
Is it good food mixed with bad food?
262
00:12:14,187 --> 00:12:16,271
Let's discuss this later, shall we?
263
00:12:16,354 --> 00:12:19,771
All right, what about this one?
A wild boar in a toga goes into a tavern…
264
00:12:19,854 --> 00:12:21,687
-[Caesar] Fastanfurius, come here.
-Mmm?
265
00:12:21,771 --> 00:12:22,979
I'll tell you later.
266
00:12:23,062 --> 00:12:25,396
[whispers] Do you have everything ready?
267
00:12:25,479 --> 00:12:27,687
Yes, all is ready, Caesar.
268
00:12:27,771 --> 00:12:29,729
[Caesar] Very good. Very good.
269
00:12:30,396 --> 00:12:33,312
[woman on Tannoy] Little Anonymus,
your parents are waiting
270
00:12:33,396 --> 00:12:34,979
at the bumper chariots.
271
00:12:35,062 --> 00:12:37,812
-Little Anonymus…
-[artist] Don't move.
272
00:12:37,896 --> 00:12:41,354
I'm nearly there,
just finishing my caricature.
273
00:12:41,437 --> 00:12:42,479
And there you are.
274
00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:43,729
[both laugh]
275
00:12:43,812 --> 00:12:45,729
-He put a lot into that!
-Oh!
276
00:12:45,812 --> 00:12:48,562
[riders exclaim and laugh]
277
00:12:48,646 --> 00:12:50,937
[both scream]
278
00:12:51,021 --> 00:12:53,021
[jolly carnival music plays]
279
00:12:53,104 --> 00:12:54,604
[both continue screaming]
280
00:12:57,562 --> 00:12:59,396
I'm sorry, Caesar.
281
00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:02,812
Would you mind if you posed
for a quick mosaic?
282
00:13:02,896 --> 00:13:04,729
No, but of course! My pleasure.
283
00:13:06,104 --> 00:13:07,604
[tiles rattle]
284
00:13:12,437 --> 00:13:13,437
[tiles rattle]
285
00:13:14,187 --> 00:13:15,646
-[tiles rattle]
-Ah.
286
00:13:21,521 --> 00:13:22,729
[tiles rattle]
287
00:13:25,187 --> 00:13:26,312
Mmm…
288
00:13:28,687 --> 00:13:29,687
[tiles rattle]
289
00:13:33,354 --> 00:13:34,354
[tiles rattle]
290
00:13:35,771 --> 00:13:38,062
I imagine you do this an awful lot.
Must be a pain.
291
00:13:38,146 --> 00:13:40,021
Well, it is our era. I'm happy to.
292
00:13:41,937 --> 00:13:44,937
This wine is tip-top.
It's fermented in a vineyard nearby.
293
00:13:45,021 --> 00:13:48,187
You'll see, it's very woody,
with fruity notes. Would you care to try?
294
00:13:48,271 --> 00:13:51,021
Excuse me, excuse me.
Metadata, a change of plan.
295
00:13:51,104 --> 00:13:52,062
I wrote it down.
296
00:13:52,146 --> 00:13:55,187
You can taste chestnut
and cherries from the Pyrenees…
297
00:13:55,271 --> 00:13:57,604
It won't be Vitalstatistix any more.
298
00:13:57,687 --> 00:14:00,437
-They have a new chief, a certain Obelix.
-[gasps]
299
00:14:00,937 --> 00:14:02,729
I'll find something less tannic.
300
00:14:02,812 --> 00:14:04,396
Oh, no! Not Obelix!
301
00:14:04,479 --> 00:14:06,729
Or Obel-nine.
302
00:14:06,812 --> 00:14:10,437
I don't know if this is an "X",
or one and ten, and that's nine.
303
00:14:10,521 --> 00:14:11,562
What's the difference?
304
00:14:11,646 --> 00:14:14,146
Huge! Obelix fell
into the magic potion pot
305
00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:15,562
when he was just a kid.
306
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:19,354
The effects on him were permanent! Oh, no.
307
00:14:19,437 --> 00:14:21,021
It's all gone wrong.
308
00:14:21,104 --> 00:14:22,104
Not Obelix.
309
00:14:22,937 --> 00:14:25,979
Or… Or… Obe-59.
310
00:14:26,562 --> 00:14:28,479
'Cause the "L" is 50.
311
00:14:28,562 --> 00:14:29,937
Not sure.
312
00:14:30,021 --> 00:14:30,979
[sighs]
313
00:14:35,771 --> 00:14:38,021
["It's A Roman World" plays distantly]
314
00:14:38,562 --> 00:14:40,146
[both] Mmm.
315
00:14:45,062 --> 00:14:47,062
Ah! Can you watch them for a bit?
316
00:14:47,146 --> 00:14:48,437
Chief.
317
00:14:50,312 --> 00:14:53,521
[Copacetix] Blimey, they'll be brimming
with energy after all that.
318
00:14:53,604 --> 00:14:55,271
[both snore]
319
00:14:55,937 --> 00:14:58,062
Chief, let me help you.
320
00:14:58,729 --> 00:15:00,604
It's a snack for Obelix before the meal.
321
00:15:00,687 --> 00:15:02,312
-I mean, before the fight.
-Mmm.
322
00:15:02,396 --> 00:15:05,896
I can't wait for this to be over
so that we can get back to normal.
323
00:15:05,979 --> 00:15:08,229
Well, I'm starting to enjoy our life now.
324
00:15:08,312 --> 00:15:10,396
Mmm, they're delicious,
these Greek meatballs.
325
00:15:10,479 --> 00:15:11,812
Hmm. What was that?
326
00:15:11,896 --> 00:15:15,104
I think they've got some veggies inside,
but they taste great to me.
327
00:15:15,187 --> 00:15:17,896
No, the bit about enjoying
this life now. What exactly?
328
00:15:17,979 --> 00:15:19,812
I love not being chief any more.
329
00:15:20,312 --> 00:15:23,562
Asterix, being the chief
is a weight on your shoulders.
330
00:15:23,646 --> 00:15:25,521
That's what my bearers often say too.
331
00:15:26,312 --> 00:15:28,146
I don't know, I feel lighter.
332
00:15:28,854 --> 00:15:30,562
I have more time for myself,
333
00:15:30,646 --> 00:15:32,479
-I sleep better at night.
-What nights?
334
00:15:32,562 --> 00:15:35,437
You were still chief this morning.
What are you talking about?
335
00:15:35,521 --> 00:15:38,729
I'm starting to think that Obelix
should be chief of our village
336
00:15:38,812 --> 00:15:39,979
even after the fight.
337
00:15:40,062 --> 00:15:43,354
Huh? No, but… No, no.
You can't… You can't be serious.
338
00:15:43,437 --> 00:15:45,187
Oh, yeah. I'm very serious.
339
00:15:45,271 --> 00:15:48,979
No, but as a fake chief to give smacks,
he's perfect, I agree.
340
00:15:49,062 --> 00:15:52,521
But to be chief of the village?
He just doesn't have any of the skills.
341
00:15:52,604 --> 00:15:55,146
-Don't see why not.
-Well, I do and I'm telling you.
342
00:15:55,229 --> 00:15:58,687
His wild boar shop idea isn't too bad,
so we should think on it.
343
00:15:58,771 --> 00:16:00,521
-See you!
-But it's ridiculous.
344
00:16:00,604 --> 00:16:02,146
-See you!
-No, er… Chief.
345
00:16:02,229 --> 00:16:03,146
Think on it.
346
00:16:03,729 --> 00:16:04,604
[sighs]
347
00:16:05,479 --> 00:16:06,354
Think on it.
348
00:16:09,896 --> 00:16:11,646
So I don't have skills then?
349
00:16:12,312 --> 00:16:15,312
Er, I didn't… say it exactly like that.
350
00:16:15,396 --> 00:16:17,729
You did. Exactly like that.
351
00:16:18,312 --> 00:16:20,271
-And that I was a fake chief too.
-Yeah.
352
00:16:20,854 --> 00:16:22,937
-No… Yeah. No, I said…
-Fake chief.
353
00:16:23,687 --> 00:16:26,312
Yes, well, okay.
Okay, I said "fake chief".
354
00:16:26,896 --> 00:16:30,187
Look, Obelix, you can't
seriously think you'd be chief forever?
355
00:16:30,271 --> 00:16:32,104
Not forever, but why not for a while?
356
00:16:32,187 --> 00:16:34,354
-There are dozens of reasons why not.
-Why?
357
00:16:34,937 --> 00:16:37,896
You worried that for once
I'll make the decisions? Is that it?
358
00:16:37,979 --> 00:16:39,854
Yes, when you throw menhirs, I am.
359
00:16:39,937 --> 00:16:42,104
That's just so petty. Ha! Typical.
360
00:16:42,187 --> 00:16:43,146
[gasps softly]
361
00:16:43,229 --> 00:16:45,229
No one else in my tribe is worried though.
362
00:16:45,312 --> 00:16:51,146
"Your tribe"? Oh, but I'm sorry
if I offended you, o great Chief Obelix!
363
00:16:51,229 --> 00:16:55,104
If you don't like it, the doors
to my village are open, so you can go!
364
00:16:55,187 --> 00:16:57,812
Hang on, hang on.
So you want me to go, just like that?
365
00:16:57,896 --> 00:17:00,562
Banishing me from your village,
is that what you're saying?
366
00:17:00,646 --> 00:17:02,979
[Obelix laughs] You know what?
Apothika was right.
367
00:17:03,062 --> 00:17:05,687
Once again, you're talking for me.
368
00:17:05,771 --> 00:17:08,812
Well, okay!
I'll shut up then. Come on, spit it out!
369
00:17:08,896 --> 00:17:10,146
That's it, you're banished!
370
00:17:10,229 --> 00:17:12,479
[melancholic music plays]
371
00:17:13,896 --> 00:17:14,812
Hmph.
372
00:17:18,146 --> 00:17:20,146
Is that your first decision as chief?
373
00:17:26,854 --> 00:17:27,771
[sighs softly]
374
00:17:33,229 --> 00:17:38,812
[horn blares]
375
00:17:38,896 --> 00:17:40,896
[woman on Tannoy]
Please return to the arena.
376
00:17:40,979 --> 00:17:42,937
The Big Fight will begin soon.
377
00:17:43,021 --> 00:17:44,271
Thank you.
378
00:17:44,354 --> 00:17:45,854
[people chatter happily]
379
00:17:45,937 --> 00:17:48,146
♪ Living in Armorica ♪
380
00:17:48,229 --> 00:17:49,437
♪ Do-day, doo-dee ♪
381
00:17:49,979 --> 00:17:51,437
♪ Do-day, doo-da ♪
382
00:17:52,937 --> 00:17:54,271
So Mummy, do you like it?
383
00:17:54,354 --> 00:17:56,646
No. I asked for bread, it isn't here.
384
00:17:56,729 --> 00:17:58,729
My bread, yoo-hoo! Bread?
385
00:17:59,271 --> 00:18:01,271
[riders scream]
386
00:18:04,562 --> 00:18:05,937
-Call me chief.
-No, it's me.
387
00:18:06,021 --> 00:18:07,896
-No, call me chief.
-No, call me chief.
388
00:18:07,979 --> 00:18:11,604
Oh, look over there, children.
A real Gaul. That's a rare sight.
389
00:18:11,687 --> 00:18:13,396
Soon they'll all be gone.
390
00:18:13,479 --> 00:18:14,729
Call me chief!
391
00:18:14,812 --> 00:18:17,812
-Or why don't we call each other chief?
-Oh, yeah!
392
00:18:19,937 --> 00:18:21,729
[laughs] So cool to be your best mate!
393
00:18:21,812 --> 00:18:23,771
-Cooler to be your best mate.
-No, it's not!
394
00:18:23,854 --> 00:18:24,687
Yeah, it is!
395
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:27,479
[young Asterix] That's what friends
are for, right?
396
00:18:27,562 --> 00:18:29,271
-[clucking]
-[gasps]
397
00:18:29,354 --> 00:18:30,771
-[laughs]
-[Apothika clucks]
398
00:18:30,854 --> 00:18:32,187
[horn honks]
399
00:18:32,271 --> 00:18:33,479
[dramatic music plays]
400
00:18:33,562 --> 00:18:35,646
[both laugh]
401
00:18:36,354 --> 00:18:37,854
Ah, ah, ah, ah! [clicks tongue]
402
00:18:38,521 --> 00:18:39,479
[sighs]
403
00:18:40,021 --> 00:18:41,021
[attendant] Okay.
404
00:18:41,104 --> 00:18:43,687
-[Getafix laughs]
-[Apothika quacking]
405
00:18:45,437 --> 00:18:46,312
Getafix!
406
00:18:46,396 --> 00:18:48,479
-[Getafix] Woohoo!
-Apothika!
407
00:18:48,562 --> 00:18:49,812
[suspenseful music plays]
408
00:18:49,896 --> 00:18:50,729
[groans]
409
00:18:50,812 --> 00:18:52,062
[exclaims]
410
00:18:53,479 --> 00:18:54,646
[screams]
411
00:18:54,729 --> 00:18:55,562
[chickens squawk]
412
00:18:55,646 --> 00:18:56,812
[Getafix exclaims]
413
00:18:57,479 --> 00:18:58,687
[gobbles]
414
00:18:58,771 --> 00:19:00,854
[light comic classical music plays]
415
00:19:00,937 --> 00:19:01,896
[groans]
416
00:19:05,062 --> 00:19:06,812
[Getafix laughs] Woohoo!
417
00:19:07,812 --> 00:19:09,187
[horns honk]
418
00:19:09,271 --> 00:19:10,562
Ah! [pants]
419
00:19:11,062 --> 00:19:12,437
[exclaims repeatedly]
420
00:19:13,729 --> 00:19:14,854
[groans]
421
00:19:14,937 --> 00:19:16,271
[in wild voice] Hello!
422
00:19:16,812 --> 00:19:17,646
[grunts]
423
00:19:18,312 --> 00:19:20,062
Hello again!
424
00:19:20,729 --> 00:19:23,854
[Asterix exclaims repeatedly]
425
00:19:25,437 --> 00:19:27,729
[Apothika laughs]
426
00:19:28,896 --> 00:19:29,771
Whoa!
427
00:19:29,854 --> 00:19:31,812
Whoa!
428
00:19:31,896 --> 00:19:33,479
[music peaks then stops]
429
00:19:33,562 --> 00:19:35,437
-[bell rings]
-[yells]
430
00:19:35,521 --> 00:19:37,437
Go on, kiddo, try your luck.
431
00:19:37,521 --> 00:19:40,729
You just gotta knock one of 'em down
and you win the figurine.
432
00:19:41,521 --> 00:19:42,979
-[groans]
-[child gasps]
433
00:19:43,062 --> 00:19:44,187
[yells happily]
434
00:19:44,271 --> 00:19:46,271
-[both laugh]
-All right, fair game.
435
00:19:46,979 --> 00:19:48,062
[both laugh]
436
00:19:50,979 --> 00:19:52,979
[both hum melodically]
437
00:19:53,604 --> 00:19:54,604
[groans]
438
00:19:54,687 --> 00:19:56,687
[ominous music plays]
439
00:20:00,896 --> 00:20:05,771
[gasps] Hold on. I've just got an update.
Vitalstatistix won't be fighting.
440
00:20:05,854 --> 00:20:08,312
And a new chief
will be fighting instead, Obelix.
441
00:20:08,396 --> 00:20:09,854
What? Give me that!
442
00:20:10,687 --> 00:20:12,479
Er, oh, yeah. I forgot I can't read.
443
00:20:12,562 --> 00:20:14,979
-[horn blares]
-Huh? The buccina!
444
00:20:15,062 --> 00:20:17,312
So, kids, it's about to start.
445
00:20:17,396 --> 00:20:19,437
Hooray! Enjoy the spectacle!
446
00:20:19,521 --> 00:20:21,521
[grandiose classical music plays]
447
00:20:22,312 --> 00:20:24,271
[crowd cheers]
448
00:20:28,562 --> 00:20:30,062
[crowd cheers wildly]
449
00:20:33,771 --> 00:20:34,979
[music peaks, stops]
450
00:20:35,062 --> 00:20:37,396
Wow! Magnificent!
451
00:20:37,479 --> 00:20:39,562
Ah, it still gets me, you know?
452
00:20:39,646 --> 00:20:41,312
Hey? It gives me goosebumps.
453
00:20:42,812 --> 00:20:45,479
Pompey treated his mother
to the Venice illuminations
454
00:20:45,562 --> 00:20:48,187
so let's not get over-excited
by sparklers.
455
00:20:49,021 --> 00:20:51,021
[crowd cheering]
456
00:20:56,729 --> 00:20:59,562
[enunciating floridly but indistinctly]
457
00:21:04,646 --> 00:21:07,229
Sorry to be rude, we don't understand you.
458
00:21:07,771 --> 00:21:09,229
Oh, my bad. Sure.
459
00:21:09,312 --> 00:21:11,479
[grandly but clearly]
In the left-hand corner,
460
00:21:11,562 --> 00:21:13,687
in green skirt and feathered plume,
461
00:21:13,771 --> 00:21:16,312
the serum's pilum,
462
00:21:16,396 --> 00:21:17,854
stronger than the forum,
463
00:21:17,937 --> 00:21:19,771
more stable than marble,
464
00:21:19,854 --> 00:21:21,896
the most Gallo of Romans,
465
00:21:21,979 --> 00:21:24,437
the most Roman of Gallos…
466
00:21:24,521 --> 00:21:29,021
Cassius Ceramix!
467
00:21:29,104 --> 00:21:32,104
["Turn Down for What"
by DJ Snake and Lil Jon plays]
468
00:21:32,187 --> 00:21:33,396
[crowd cheers]
469
00:21:33,479 --> 00:21:35,854
Oh, yes, that was good.
We understood everything.
470
00:21:37,729 --> 00:21:40,104
[hollering rhythmically]
471
00:21:46,146 --> 00:21:47,271
[music distorts]
472
00:21:48,562 --> 00:21:51,021
-Yeah!
-[Gauls boo]
473
00:21:52,396 --> 00:21:53,312
[Cassius yells]
474
00:21:54,854 --> 00:21:55,771
[grunts]
475
00:21:58,521 --> 00:22:01,396
And in the right-hand corner,
476
00:22:01,479 --> 00:22:04,062
blue and white braccae,
477
00:22:04,146 --> 00:22:05,937
with red braids…
478
00:22:06,021 --> 00:22:08,396
Come on then, it's our turn, champ.
479
00:22:08,479 --> 00:22:10,562
The Celtic firkin,
480
00:22:10,646 --> 00:22:13,562
the menhir of Armorica,
481
00:22:13,646 --> 00:22:18,021
Obelix!
482
00:22:18,104 --> 00:22:19,021
Hmm?
483
00:22:19,104 --> 00:22:20,396
Obelix?!
484
00:22:22,187 --> 00:22:25,729
["Turn Down For What?" continues playing]
485
00:22:25,812 --> 00:22:26,771
Huh?
486
00:22:30,604 --> 00:22:33,187
[Geriatrix] Don't forget, tire him out.
487
00:22:33,271 --> 00:22:35,812
Think of your legwork.
Mind out for his right hook and…
488
00:22:35,896 --> 00:22:38,937
-I'll give him a smack.
-Oh, yeah, that works too.
489
00:22:39,021 --> 00:22:43,687
Hey, hey! Look who it is!
He's hit me loads o' times!
490
00:22:43,771 --> 00:22:46,646
Obelix, yoo-hoo!
491
00:22:46,729 --> 00:22:48,687
[stairs creaking]
492
00:22:53,437 --> 00:22:55,229
[metal strains]
493
00:22:56,354 --> 00:22:57,437
[music stops]
494
00:22:58,562 --> 00:23:00,396
[sniffs and grumbles]
495
00:23:00,479 --> 00:23:02,646
[whimpering]
496
00:23:03,229 --> 00:23:05,479
Now, come to the centre of the platform.
497
00:23:05,562 --> 00:23:08,854
[Obelix's steps thud heavily]
498
00:23:08,937 --> 00:23:11,479
Let's go over all of the moves.
499
00:23:11,562 --> 00:23:13,646
Kick, punch, neck, carpus,
500
00:23:13,729 --> 00:23:15,646
metacarpus, humerus, malleolus.
501
00:23:15,729 --> 00:23:18,771
You all right there?
Knee, head, no holds barred!
502
00:23:19,312 --> 00:23:21,729
So, no… no rules?
503
00:23:22,312 --> 00:23:25,854
The combat continues until one
of you is defeated or withdraws.
504
00:23:25,937 --> 00:23:27,812
Ah-ah! Defeat or withdrawal?
505
00:23:27,896 --> 00:23:29,187
I'd like to say "Alas"
506
00:23:29,271 --> 00:23:31,271
because we don't fight
to the death any more.
507
00:23:31,354 --> 00:23:32,979
Blackangus, things change.
508
00:23:33,062 --> 00:23:34,646
I know, I know, Hannabarbera.
509
00:23:34,729 --> 00:23:36,771
Wild beasts can't even fight now,
can they?
510
00:23:36,854 --> 00:23:38,771
A lion against an elephant, forbidden!
511
00:23:38,854 --> 00:23:40,854
Maybe 'cause it's a bit cruel to animals?
512
00:23:40,937 --> 00:23:42,937
They were fed with slaves, Hannabarbera!
513
00:23:43,021 --> 00:23:46,521
Is that cruel? Seriously?
What's the world coming to, eh?
514
00:23:46,604 --> 00:23:48,521
Maybe it makes us more human though.
515
00:23:48,604 --> 00:23:51,604
But aren't we becoming less cruel?
Just a question!
516
00:23:52,354 --> 00:23:53,271
[shell feeds back]
517
00:23:53,354 --> 00:23:55,812
So, er, Ave Caesar.
518
00:23:56,562 --> 00:23:59,229
The one about to die
salutes you, as they say.
519
00:23:59,312 --> 00:24:01,229
So, er, Ave then.
520
00:24:03,146 --> 00:24:04,479
Your turn, Obelix.
521
00:24:05,021 --> 00:24:06,396
Er, what do I do?
522
00:24:06,479 --> 00:24:09,562
Your speech to the crowd.
It's your turn, we're all ears.
523
00:24:09,646 --> 00:24:11,812
-[man in crowd] Speech!
-A speech?
524
00:24:13,354 --> 00:24:15,479
-[Vitalstatistix exclaims excitedly]
-Asterix…
525
00:24:18,146 --> 00:24:19,562
[whines curiously]
526
00:24:19,646 --> 00:24:21,021
[tense music plays]
527
00:24:24,146 --> 00:24:25,021
This menhir…
528
00:24:25,104 --> 00:24:26,479
[panting]
529
00:24:26,562 --> 00:24:28,062
Oh, no, Obelix!
530
00:24:29,521 --> 00:24:31,854
Right, er… [clears throat] Okay.
531
00:24:32,854 --> 00:24:35,771
Gentlemen, have a good fight.
532
00:24:35,854 --> 00:24:40,104
[audio fades] And when you hear
the buccina, you can rumble!
533
00:24:40,687 --> 00:24:42,729
[horn blares distantly]
534
00:24:42,812 --> 00:24:44,604
[heart beating]
535
00:24:50,437 --> 00:24:52,021
[high-pitched ringing]
536
00:24:55,562 --> 00:24:56,604
[audio distorting]
537
00:24:56,687 --> 00:24:58,812
[heart beats rapidly]
538
00:25:03,312 --> 00:25:04,312
[crowd gasps]
539
00:25:05,104 --> 00:25:06,104
[gasps]
540
00:25:10,271 --> 00:25:11,354
One…
541
00:25:11,437 --> 00:25:12,854
[suspenseful music plays]
542
00:25:17,396 --> 00:25:18,271
Two…
543
00:25:22,187 --> 00:25:26,604
He didn't touch him! What is this?
No blows, no bites, nothing!
544
00:25:26,687 --> 00:25:29,104
Come on! I'm 27 and I've never seen that!
545
00:25:29,187 --> 00:25:31,396
-Four!
-[Geriatrix] Come on, get up!
546
00:25:31,979 --> 00:25:33,229
What are you doing?
547
00:25:33,312 --> 00:25:34,229
[Twinpix] Five!
548
00:25:37,104 --> 00:25:38,521
Six!
549
00:25:40,437 --> 00:25:43,437
-Seven!
-It's rubbish! What is going on?
550
00:25:43,521 --> 00:25:45,104
I can't believe my eye!
551
00:25:45,187 --> 00:25:46,146
[Twinpix] Eight!
552
00:25:46,229 --> 00:25:47,187
[whines]
553
00:25:47,271 --> 00:25:49,271
Nine!
554
00:25:49,354 --> 00:25:51,271
Obelix!
555
00:25:52,729 --> 00:25:54,646
-And ten!
-[bell rings]
556
00:25:54,729 --> 00:25:57,479
It's over!
557
00:25:58,521 --> 00:25:59,479
So I won?
558
00:25:59,562 --> 00:26:00,979
[triumphant music plays]
559
00:26:01,062 --> 00:26:03,562
[grunting in joy]
560
00:26:03,646 --> 00:26:04,521
[gasps]
561
00:26:10,396 --> 00:26:12,937
[music peaks, stops]
562
00:26:15,146 --> 00:26:17,562
[lively classical theme music plays]
563
00:26:48,146 --> 00:26:50,562
ASTERIX & OBELIX: THE BIG FIGHT
564
00:27:28,771 --> 00:27:32,021
[musical arrangement turns
sweeping and sentimental]
565
00:29:52,354 --> 00:29:54,354
[upbeat Celtic folk music plays]
566
00:29:54,354 --> 00:29:59,354
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567
00:29:54,354 --> 00:30:04,354
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