All language subtitles for Squidbillies.S03E13.Armageddon.it.On.1080p.HMAX.WEBRip.DD.2.0.x265-edge2020_track3_[eng]
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Ewe
Faroese
Filipino
Finnish
French
Frisian
Ga
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hindi
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Igbo
Indonesian
Interlingua
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kannada
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kurdish (Soranî)
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lingala
Lithuanian
Lozi
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Malayalam
Maltese
Maori
Marathi
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Nigerian Pidgin
Northern Sotho
Norwegian
Norwegian (Nynorsk)
Occitan
Oriya
Oromo
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Punjabi
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Runyakitara
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Serbo-Croatian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Spanish (Latin American)
Sundanese
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Tatar
Telugu
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Tshiluba
Tumbuka
Turkish
Turkmen
Twi
Uighur
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof
Xhosa
Yiddish
Yoruba
Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,013 --> 00:00:03,014
[ static ]
2
00:00:03,016 --> 00:00:05,009
[ country music plays ]
3
00:00:05,011 --> 00:00:07,023
>> ♪ I gave all my best years
4
00:00:07,025 --> 00:00:10,029
To that woman ♪
5
00:00:11,001 --> 00:00:13,019
♪ and all she gave me was mouths
6
00:00:13,021 --> 00:00:15,029
To feed ♪
7
00:00:16,001 --> 00:00:18,016
♪ a miracle straight from the
8
00:00:18,018 --> 00:00:21,016
Loins of jesus ♪
9
00:00:21,018 --> 00:00:23,005
♪ since charlie blew off
10
00:00:23,007 --> 00:00:25,018
Both my testes ♪
11
00:00:25,020 --> 00:00:27,028
♪ 1969 came around the bend ♪
12
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:28,021
>> rusty: my turn.
13
00:00:28,023 --> 00:00:29,015
>> early: hell no.
14
00:00:29,017 --> 00:00:30,017
>> rusty: let me drive that
15
00:00:30,019 --> 00:00:30,028
Thing!
16
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:33,002
>> early: do not touch the trim!
17
00:00:36,017 --> 00:00:38,021
>> granny: [ snorts ]
18
00:00:38,023 --> 00:00:39,029
[ grunts ]
19
00:00:40,001 --> 00:00:42,020
Oh. Oh.
20
00:00:42,022 --> 00:00:44,002
Oh, lord.
21
00:00:44,004 --> 00:00:44,022
[ slurps ]
22
00:00:44,024 --> 00:00:45,014
Mmm!
23
00:00:45,016 --> 00:00:46,002
Chiggers!
24
00:00:46,004 --> 00:00:47,009
>> rusty: whoo! Yeah!
25
00:00:47,011 --> 00:00:48,005
Family-style!
26
00:00:48,007 --> 00:00:50,021
>> granny: mmm. Juicy ones, too.
27
00:00:50,023 --> 00:00:53,003
Rusty, fetch the freezer jars.
28
00:00:53,005 --> 00:00:54,000
[ thunder crashes ]
29
00:00:54,002 --> 00:00:55,009
>> rusty: look, daddy -- up in
30
00:00:55,011 --> 00:00:55,024
The sky!
31
00:00:55,026 --> 00:00:56,022
>> early: hell yeah!
32
00:00:56,024 --> 00:00:57,029
The base is puttin' on a air
33
00:00:58,001 --> 00:00:58,010
Show!
34
00:00:58,012 --> 00:00:59,004
[ horse neighs ]
35
00:00:59,006 --> 00:01:01,027
>> to all that I survey,
36
00:01:01,029 --> 00:01:04,002
Judgment day is coming.
37
00:01:04,004 --> 00:01:05,017
>> early: hell yes, it is!
38
00:01:05,019 --> 00:01:07,008
Damn 'em all to kingdom come!
39
00:01:07,010 --> 00:01:08,015
Whoo! Bag 'em and tag 'em!
40
00:01:08,017 --> 00:01:09,018
Stack 'em and rack 'em!
41
00:01:09,020 --> 00:01:10,029
>> heed the words that I say.
42
00:01:11,001 --> 00:01:12,012
>> early: let god sort 'em out!
43
00:01:12,014 --> 00:01:13,006
>> settle down!
44
00:01:13,008 --> 00:01:14,020
>> early: america is number one!
45
00:01:14,022 --> 00:01:15,024
>> all right, all right!
46
00:01:15,026 --> 00:01:18,008
Please, please -- shut up!
47
00:01:18,010 --> 00:01:20,025
I am
48
00:01:20,027 --> 00:01:22,005
>> early: oh. I get it.
49
00:01:22,007 --> 00:01:22,026
Air
50
00:01:22,028 --> 00:01:23,017
Black ops.
51
00:01:23,019 --> 00:01:24,023
Confound the primitive arab
52
00:01:24,025 --> 00:01:25,005
Mind!
53
00:01:25,007 --> 00:01:26,014
>> rusty: daddy, look -- blood
54
00:01:26,016 --> 00:01:27,023
Sludge comin' out the spigot.
55
00:01:27,025 --> 00:01:29,004
>> early: either this is spring
56
00:01:29,006 --> 00:01:30,020
Break at p.C. Beach or we in
57
00:01:30,022 --> 00:01:31,029
Some damn jamie kennedy
58
00:01:32,001 --> 00:01:32,021
Experiment.
59
00:01:32,023 --> 00:01:35,014
>> that is blood...
60
00:01:35,016 --> 00:01:39,020
A
61
00:01:39,022 --> 00:01:41,000
>> rusty: don't get no better
62
00:01:41,002 --> 00:01:43,017
Than this.
63
00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:44,025
>> okay, they're drinking the
64
00:01:44,027 --> 00:01:46,010
Blood.
65
00:01:46,012 --> 00:01:48,005
>> granny: mmm.
66
00:01:48,007 --> 00:01:49,002
>> what the hell.
67
00:01:49,004 --> 00:01:50,010
What the hell with the --
68
00:01:50,012 --> 00:01:51,016
You know, you're just --
69
00:01:51,018 --> 00:01:54,001
You're disgusting me, here.
70
00:01:56,009 --> 00:01:57,016
[ clears throat ]
71
00:01:57,018 --> 00:02:00,022
I am one of the four horsemen of
72
00:02:00,024 --> 00:02:02,014
The apocalypse.
73
00:02:02,016 --> 00:02:03,023
[ thunder crashes ]
74
00:02:03,025 --> 00:02:05,004
>> early: which un?
75
00:02:05,006 --> 00:02:05,026
>> pestilence.
76
00:02:05,028 --> 00:02:07,004
>> rusty: what is that -- like,
77
00:02:07,006 --> 00:02:07,025
Grasshoppers?
78
00:02:07,027 --> 00:02:11,010
>> these are locusts with human
79
00:02:11,012 --> 00:02:14,000
Faces and the tails of
80
00:02:14,002 --> 00:02:14,021
Scorpions.
81
00:02:14,023 --> 00:02:15,015
>> yeah, son.
82
00:02:15,017 --> 00:02:17,000
We swarm all around your fat
83
00:02:17,002 --> 00:02:17,017
Face --
84
00:02:17,019 --> 00:02:18,014
>> granny: he's
85
00:02:18,016 --> 00:02:20,006
Overcompensating.
86
00:02:20,008 --> 00:02:21,004
>> hey.
87
00:02:21,006 --> 00:02:24,009
One word -- apocalyptic
88
00:02:24,011 --> 00:02:25,020
Horseman, fool!
89
00:02:25,022 --> 00:02:28,000
>> early: war, famine, death...
90
00:02:28,002 --> 00:02:29,015
And grasshoppers.
91
00:02:29,017 --> 00:02:31,018
Well, now, one don't quite
92
00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:32,010
Belong, does it?
93
00:02:32,012 --> 00:02:33,005
[ thunder crashes ]
94
00:02:33,007 --> 00:02:35,005
>> prepare for the end of days.
95
00:02:35,007 --> 00:02:36,027
Consider yourself warned.
96
00:02:36,029 --> 00:02:38,026
Let's get the hell out of here!
97
00:02:38,028 --> 00:02:40,018
Ya!
98
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:46,023
>> granny: big man.
99
00:02:48,019 --> 00:02:49,013
>> rusty: [ grunts ]
100
00:02:49,015 --> 00:02:50,020
>> early: just one more, now.
101
00:02:50,022 --> 00:02:51,016
>> rusty: daddy, no!
102
00:02:51,018 --> 00:02:52,017
>> early: one...More.
103
00:02:52,019 --> 00:02:53,013
>> rusty: no. No.
104
00:02:53,015 --> 00:02:54,006
I can't, daddy.
105
00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:55,010
>> early: now a twofer.
106
00:02:55,012 --> 00:02:56,023
>> granny: early, you can't take
107
00:02:56,025 --> 00:02:57,014
It with you.
108
00:02:57,016 --> 00:02:58,018
>> early: hell,
109
00:02:58,020 --> 00:02:59,016
The liquor mule is.
110
00:02:59,018 --> 00:03:00,028
Jesus is gonna be so busy with
111
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,006
The rapture, he ain't never
112
00:03:02,008 --> 00:03:03,015
Gonna look up my boy's butt.
113
00:03:03,017 --> 00:03:04,023
>> rusty: what's a rupture?
114
00:03:04,025 --> 00:03:06,004
>> granny: that's when all the
115
00:03:06,006 --> 00:03:08,000
Good people fly out of their
116
00:03:08,002 --> 00:03:10,011
Clothes straight up into heaven.
117
00:03:10,013 --> 00:03:12,007
>> rusty: like superman?
118
00:03:12,009 --> 00:03:14,015
>> granny: yes, but completely
119
00:03:14,017 --> 00:03:14,027
Nude.
120
00:03:14,029 --> 00:03:16,011
>> early: whew. Gonna be one hot
121
00:03:16,013 --> 00:03:17,017
Tangle of bodies up there.
122
00:03:17,019 --> 00:03:19,001
>> granny: I know you don't need
123
00:03:19,003 --> 00:03:20,009
To eat or drink, 'cause I'm
124
00:03:20,011 --> 00:03:22,027
Gonna be bangin' all day.
125
00:03:22,029 --> 00:03:23,017
>> chosen.
126
00:03:23,019 --> 00:03:24,016
>> rusty: granny?
127
00:03:24,018 --> 00:03:25,002
Granny?!
128
00:03:25,004 --> 00:03:26,017
>> granny: hallelujah!
129
00:03:26,019 --> 00:03:27,024
I'm coming, lord.
130
00:03:27,026 --> 00:03:29,020
>> rusty: look, daddy! Look!
131
00:03:29,022 --> 00:03:30,022
>> granny: oh!
132
00:03:30,024 --> 00:03:31,019
Put your hands out!
133
00:03:31,021 --> 00:03:32,015
[ glass smashes ]
134
00:03:32,017 --> 00:03:33,013
>> early: damn it!
135
00:03:33,015 --> 00:03:34,022
Mind the beverages, russell!
136
00:03:34,024 --> 00:03:36,006
Clench them cheeks!
137
00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:38,000
>> granny: I'm afraid of
138
00:03:38,002 --> 00:03:39,006
Heights, lord.
139
00:03:39,008 --> 00:03:40,026
>> dan halen: damn it.
140
00:03:40,028 --> 00:03:41,028
The rapture.
141
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,008
Science -- you fool!
142
00:03:44,010 --> 00:03:46,010
[ alarm blaring ]
143
00:03:48,012 --> 00:03:49,025
...And the father and the son
144
00:03:49,027 --> 00:03:51,015
And the holy ghost. Amen.
145
00:03:51,017 --> 00:03:53,010
"Apply liberally to agnostic
146
00:03:53,012 --> 00:03:55,004
Areas and put your faith in
147
00:03:55,006 --> 00:03:55,021
Him."
148
00:03:55,023 --> 00:03:59,023
[ rattling ]
149
00:03:59,025 --> 00:04:01,008
Praise jesus.
150
00:04:01,010 --> 00:04:02,006
Praise him!
151
00:04:02,008 --> 00:04:03,024
[ whoosh ]
152
00:04:03,026 --> 00:04:05,011
>> are you gonna meet the lord
153
00:04:05,013 --> 00:04:06,017
With that tiny [bleep]
154
00:04:06,019 --> 00:04:08,004
>> sheriff: it'll look a whole
155
00:04:08,006 --> 00:04:09,014
Lot bigger when we get to
156
00:04:09,016 --> 00:04:10,000
Heaven.
157
00:04:10,002 --> 00:04:11,005
>> dan halen: I have to say it
158
00:04:11,007 --> 00:04:11,027
Was all worth it!
159
00:04:11,029 --> 00:04:15,021
Screw every last one of you!
160
00:04:15,023 --> 00:04:17,004
>> am I lookin' at the right
161
00:04:17,006 --> 00:04:17,029
Thing?
162
00:04:18,001 --> 00:04:20,006
[ "Jingle bells" plays ]
163
00:04:20,008 --> 00:04:21,025
>> judgment day?
164
00:04:21,027 --> 00:04:22,016
Damn.
165
00:04:22,018 --> 00:04:25,000
I guess there
166
00:04:25,002 --> 00:04:26,019
The season.
167
00:04:32,001 --> 00:04:33,016
>> er...Everything?
168
00:04:33,018 --> 00:04:34,022
>> uh...
169
00:04:34,024 --> 00:04:36,008
I could maybe fold the
170
00:04:36,010 --> 00:04:38,004
Anal-beads team into yo-yos,
171
00:04:38,006 --> 00:04:39,023
But -- but no vibrators.
172
00:04:39,025 --> 00:04:41,025
>> can't we just call them back
173
00:04:41,027 --> 00:04:42,020
Massagers?
174
00:04:42,022 --> 00:04:43,009
>> no.
175
00:04:43,011 --> 00:04:44,029
[ exhales heavily ]
176
00:04:45,001 --> 00:04:45,014
Yes.
177
00:04:45,016 --> 00:04:47,008
Yes, we can make that work.
178
00:04:47,010 --> 00:04:48,027
I'll call sharper image.
179
00:04:48,029 --> 00:04:50,014
>> what about this, santa?
180
00:04:50,016 --> 00:04:51,013
[ gun cocks ]
181
00:04:51,015 --> 00:04:53,008
>> the kalashnikovs with the
182
00:04:53,010 --> 00:04:55,002
Drum-type rear sight and the
183
00:04:55,004 --> 00:04:56,009
Fixed stock -- oh.
184
00:04:56,011 --> 00:04:58,000
God, that's a nice weapon.
185
00:04:58,002 --> 00:04:59,007
Uh...
186
00:04:59,009 --> 00:05:00,015
Let me hold off on that.
187
00:05:00,017 --> 00:05:01,005
>> chosen.
188
00:05:01,007 --> 00:05:02,027
>> santa, look! It's happening!
189
00:05:02,029 --> 00:05:04,002
>> get back down here!
190
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:05,010
>> it's happening, santa!
191
00:05:05,012 --> 00:05:06,027
>> you told us we have no soul.
192
00:05:06,029 --> 00:05:08,029
>> you're still my slaves!
193
00:05:12,001 --> 00:05:13,010
[ exhales heavily ]
194
00:05:13,012 --> 00:05:15,015
Merry christmas, afghanistan.
195
00:05:15,017 --> 00:05:16,029
>> rusty: goodbye, you dumbasses
196
00:05:17,001 --> 00:05:18,009
That told me to study algebra.
197
00:05:18,011 --> 00:05:19,021
Goodbye, patrick swayze poster.
198
00:05:19,023 --> 00:05:20,027
Goodbye, truck-boat truck.
199
00:05:20,029 --> 00:05:22,004
>> early: don't you worry,
200
00:05:22,006 --> 00:05:22,019
Russell.
201
00:05:22,021 --> 00:05:24,000
The truck-boat truck will meet
202
00:05:24,002 --> 00:05:25,003
Us at the pearly gates.
203
00:05:25,005 --> 00:05:25,029
It's got the gps.
204
00:05:26,001 --> 00:05:27,007
>> granny: you can't bog in
205
00:05:27,009 --> 00:05:27,021
Heaven.
206
00:05:27,023 --> 00:05:28,018
>> early: do what?
207
00:05:28,020 --> 00:05:29,022
>> granny: ain't no mud.
208
00:05:29,024 --> 00:05:30,021
>> early: unh-unh.
209
00:05:30,023 --> 00:05:32,006
Satan, come into me, and I will
210
00:05:32,008 --> 00:05:33,008
Serve you, dark lord!
211
00:05:33,010 --> 00:05:34,007
I am your vessel!
212
00:05:34,009 --> 00:05:35,009
>> granny: early, no!
213
00:05:35,011 --> 00:05:36,022
>> early: I got to go muddin'
214
00:05:36,024 --> 00:05:38,005
One last time!
215
00:05:38,007 --> 00:05:39,008
Hell, I'll repent later.
216
00:05:39,010 --> 00:05:40,003
He knows my heart.
217
00:05:40,005 --> 00:05:41,008
>> rusty: wait, daddy! No!
218
00:05:41,010 --> 00:05:42,011
I want to stay with you!
219
00:05:42,013 --> 00:05:43,020
>> early: then touch your damn
220
00:05:43,022 --> 00:05:46,010
Wiener!
221
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:49,016
>> rusty: aaaaaaaah!
222
00:05:49,018 --> 00:05:50,019
>> oh, my goodness!
223
00:05:50,021 --> 00:05:51,025
The rapture -- at last!
224
00:05:51,027 --> 00:05:53,012
>> well. What's goin' on with
225
00:05:53,014 --> 00:05:55,001
All these people flyin' around?
226
00:05:55,003 --> 00:05:56,021
>> you might want to step aside
227
00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,016
As I fly forth into the heavens,
228
00:05:58,018 --> 00:05:58,029
Hmm?
229
00:05:59,001 --> 00:06:00,016
Jesus will want me quickly.
230
00:06:00,018 --> 00:06:01,011
[ chuckles ]
231
00:06:01,013 --> 00:06:02,024
Might take your arm clean off,
232
00:06:02,026 --> 00:06:03,006
Boy.
233
00:06:03,008 --> 00:06:03,028
>> excuse me.
234
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:06,000
You do what you got to do.
235
00:06:08,006 --> 00:06:09,007
>> [ chuckles ]
236
00:06:09,009 --> 00:06:10,011
Any minute now.
237
00:06:10,013 --> 00:06:11,028
>> I'm prayin' for you,
238
00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:12,021
Reverend.
239
00:06:12,023 --> 00:06:13,013
>> yeah.
240
00:06:13,015 --> 00:06:15,006
A little further back, boy.
241
00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:16,018
>> oh, sorry. Sorry.
242
00:06:16,020 --> 00:06:17,026
>> chosen.
243
00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:18,021
>> ooh!
244
00:06:18,023 --> 00:06:20,002
Whoo! Howdy do dang!
245
00:06:20,004 --> 00:06:21,029
It's just like you said, rev.
246
00:06:22,001 --> 00:06:23,025
>> yeah, well, it's our time,
247
00:06:23,027 --> 00:06:24,012
Boy.
248
00:06:24,014 --> 00:06:25,020
We're coming home.
249
00:06:25,022 --> 00:06:26,025
[ laughs ]
250
00:06:26,027 --> 00:06:29,019
[ groans ]
251
00:06:29,021 --> 00:06:31,003
>> well, this is awkward.
252
00:06:31,005 --> 00:06:32,025
If you wouldn't mind, would you
253
00:06:32,027 --> 00:06:33,028
Lock up the store?
254
00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:34,029
Here's the keys.
255
00:06:35,001 --> 00:06:36,024
>> chosen.
256
00:06:36,026 --> 00:06:40,003
>> oh! Come on!
257
00:06:40,005 --> 00:06:42,013
>> 4,398.
258
00:06:42,015 --> 00:06:43,023
4,399.
259
00:06:43,025 --> 00:06:44,026
>> dan halen: [ chuckles ]
260
00:06:44,028 --> 00:06:46,011
>> 4,400, and that's it.
261
00:06:46,013 --> 00:06:47,015
Peter, we're all full.
262
00:06:47,017 --> 00:06:48,027
>> sheriff: w-wait a minute.
263
00:06:48,029 --> 00:06:49,021
What about me?
264
00:06:49,023 --> 00:06:52,007
>> I'm sorry. 4,400 is the cut.
265
00:06:52,009 --> 00:06:53,012
Why don't you hang outside
266
00:06:53,014 --> 00:06:54,016
Here -- you know, with the
267
00:06:54,018 --> 00:06:55,026
Babies who can't get in because
268
00:06:55,028 --> 00:06:56,026
They weren't baptized?
269
00:06:56,028 --> 00:06:57,028
>> sheriff: but wait --
270
00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:59,009
>> why don't you just wait until
271
00:06:59,011 --> 00:06:59,022
Monday?
272
00:06:59,024 --> 00:07:01,000
Things might open up a little
273
00:07:01,002 --> 00:07:01,010
Bit.
274
00:07:01,012 --> 00:07:02,017
People might reject heavenly
275
00:07:02,019 --> 00:07:03,003
Paradise.
276
00:07:03,005 --> 00:07:04,001
Yeah. You never know.
277
00:07:04,003 --> 00:07:05,011
>> sheriff: but you brought me
278
00:07:05,013 --> 00:07:05,025
Up here.
279
00:07:05,027 --> 00:07:07,017
I mean, you know, it's not like
280
00:07:07,019 --> 00:07:08,019
I hitched a ride.
281
00:07:08,021 --> 00:07:09,015
>> I'm sorry.
282
00:07:09,017 --> 00:07:12,002
It
283
00:07:12,004 --> 00:07:14,008
>> my high-school buddy.
284
00:07:14,010 --> 00:07:16,016
Thank you, jesus.
285
00:07:16,018 --> 00:07:18,000
>> monday, right?
286
00:07:18,002 --> 00:07:19,001
[ door slams, echoes ]
287
00:07:19,003 --> 00:07:21,000
>> lift with your wings.
288
00:07:21,002 --> 00:07:23,008
>> [ shrieks ]
289
00:07:29,022 --> 00:07:31,001
>> early: how's it look, boy?
290
00:07:31,003 --> 00:07:31,023
Are we clear?
291
00:07:31,025 --> 00:07:32,029
>> rusty: yeah, we clear.
292
00:07:33,001 --> 00:07:34,012
I think that sumbitch is gone.
293
00:07:34,014 --> 00:07:35,019
>> early: all right, then.
294
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:36,008
Let's roll.
295
00:07:36,010 --> 00:07:37,005
Wait. Wait. Wait.
296
00:07:37,007 --> 00:07:38,010
Two, four...
297
00:07:38,012 --> 00:07:39,018
Eight.
298
00:07:39,020 --> 00:07:39,029
Oh!
299
00:07:40,001 --> 00:07:41,010
You left a damn subwoofer
300
00:07:41,012 --> 00:07:41,026
Behind!
301
00:07:41,028 --> 00:07:43,011
What's the point in stealin'
302
00:07:43,013 --> 00:07:44,029
Fine-ass speakers if you ain't
303
00:07:45,001 --> 00:07:46,015
Got that fine-ass rich bass?
304
00:07:46,017 --> 00:07:47,026
>> [ crying ]
305
00:07:47,028 --> 00:07:51,007
Why did he reject me?
306
00:07:51,009 --> 00:07:53,017
He even took the mexicans, for
307
00:07:53,019 --> 00:07:54,018
Goodness' sake.
308
00:07:54,020 --> 00:07:56,016
They can't even pray in english.
309
00:07:56,018 --> 00:07:57,015
>> early: aw, cheer up,
310
00:07:57,017 --> 00:07:58,000
Reverend.
311
00:07:58,002 --> 00:07:58,019
Come on, now.
312
00:07:58,021 --> 00:07:59,014
Have a flat-screen.
313
00:07:59,016 --> 00:08:00,017
>> rusty: hey, look at this
314
00:08:00,019 --> 00:08:00,029
Shirt.
315
00:08:01,001 --> 00:08:02,015
$4 at old navy, but it's free on
316
00:08:02,017 --> 00:08:03,004
The street.
317
00:08:03,006 --> 00:08:03,017
Whoo!
318
00:08:03,019 --> 00:08:04,027
>> early: russell, mute your
319
00:08:04,029 --> 00:08:05,019
"Whoos," boy.
320
00:08:05,021 --> 00:08:07,000
There's a seven-headed beast
321
00:08:07,002 --> 00:08:08,002
Afoot.
322
00:08:08,004 --> 00:08:09,001
>> rusty: whoo-hoo!
323
00:08:09,003 --> 00:08:10,005
>> early: there you go.
324
00:08:10,007 --> 00:08:12,003
>> why have you forsaken me,
325
00:08:12,005 --> 00:08:12,023
Lord?!
326
00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:13,018
>> early: shh. Shh.
327
00:08:13,020 --> 00:08:14,014
Reverend, the beast!
328
00:08:14,016 --> 00:08:16,006
>> don't you shush me! I say --
329
00:08:16,008 --> 00:08:19,005
>> [ shrieks ]
330
00:08:19,007 --> 00:08:20,015
>> granny: oh, come on.
331
00:08:20,017 --> 00:08:22,007
I thought I was gonna be young
332
00:08:22,009 --> 00:08:22,023
Again.
333
00:08:22,025 --> 00:08:23,013
>> [ sighs ]
334
00:08:23,015 --> 00:08:24,023
I don't know where people are
335
00:08:24,025 --> 00:08:25,015
Getting this.
336
00:08:25,017 --> 00:08:26,004
Believe me.
337
00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:27,017
Look, I would love to be back in
338
00:08:27,019 --> 00:08:28,004
My prime.
339
00:08:28,006 --> 00:08:29,005
It's not happening.
340
00:08:29,007 --> 00:08:30,013
>> granny: so, where's my
341
00:08:30,015 --> 00:08:31,000
Virgins?
342
00:08:31,002 --> 00:08:32,011
>> that's actually a muslim
343
00:08:32,013 --> 00:08:32,025
Thing.
344
00:08:32,027 --> 00:08:34,011
>> granny: well...
345
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:36,016
How about
346
00:08:36,018 --> 00:08:37,006
Lord?
347
00:08:37,008 --> 00:08:40,005
Take me, with that big boomin'
348
00:08:40,007 --> 00:08:41,001
Voice of yours.
349
00:08:41,003 --> 00:08:41,018
>> what?
350
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,022
>> granny: [ sniffs ]
351
00:08:42,024 --> 00:08:44,000
Mmm. Smells like olives.
352
00:08:44,002 --> 00:08:44,023
>> excuse me?
353
00:08:44,025 --> 00:08:45,024
>> granny: come on.
354
00:08:45,026 --> 00:08:47,011
Make me look like dolly parton.
355
00:08:47,013 --> 00:08:48,024
Make me look however you want.
356
00:08:48,026 --> 00:08:49,016
I don't care.
357
00:08:49,018 --> 00:08:51,020
A dog, anything, an old tire.
358
00:08:51,022 --> 00:08:53,003
What turns you on?
359
00:08:53,005 --> 00:08:53,019
>> no!
360
00:08:53,021 --> 00:08:55,005
>> granny: this is heaven.
361
00:08:55,007 --> 00:08:56,029
I ain't supposed to get rejected
362
00:08:57,001 --> 00:08:57,021
In heaven.
363
00:08:57,023 --> 00:08:59,011
>> but, granny, if I have sex
364
00:08:59,013 --> 00:09:01,000
With you, it's not heaven for
365
00:09:01,014 --> 00:09:02,017
[ thunder crashes ]
366
00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:06,006
>> who turned on the rapture?
367
00:09:06,008 --> 00:09:07,010
>> you told me to.
368
00:09:07,012 --> 00:09:08,027
>> that was a parable, son.
369
00:09:08,029 --> 00:09:10,006
We've been over this.
370
00:09:10,008 --> 00:09:11,023
>> how is "Yes, thursday --
371
00:09:11,025 --> 00:09:13,000
Whatever" a parable?
372
00:09:13,002 --> 00:09:14,005
>> I don't know.
373
00:09:14,007 --> 00:09:16,003
It was probably one of satan's
374
00:09:16,005 --> 00:09:16,023
Tricks.
375
00:09:16,025 --> 00:09:18,020
The guy's always messing with
376
00:09:18,022 --> 00:09:19,003
Us.
377
00:09:19,005 --> 00:09:20,019
After all, we're decimated by
378
00:09:20,021 --> 00:09:21,008
Injuries.
379
00:09:21,010 --> 00:09:22,023
>> you say that whenever you
380
00:09:22,025 --> 00:09:23,026
Don't listen to me.
381
00:09:23,028 --> 00:09:26,009
You never listen!
382
00:09:28,016 --> 00:09:29,023
>> granny: see anything you
383
00:09:29,025 --> 00:09:31,016
Like?
384
00:09:38,006 --> 00:09:40,022
>> [ slurps ]
385
00:09:40,024 --> 00:09:42,019
>> what's the safe word?
386
00:09:44,021 --> 00:09:45,021
>> early: [ laughs ]
387
00:09:45,023 --> 00:09:47,010
Man, them jews is funny.
388
00:09:47,012 --> 00:09:48,017
>> rusty: hey, man, what's this
389
00:09:48,019 --> 00:09:49,005
Speaker for?
390
00:09:49,007 --> 00:09:50,008
>> early: that there is the
391
00:09:50,010 --> 00:09:51,015
Back-left tweeter -- you know,
392
00:09:51,017 --> 00:09:52,021
Supportin'-character dialogue.
393
00:09:52,023 --> 00:09:53,029
>> rusty: how come I don't hear
394
00:09:54,001 --> 00:09:54,012
Nothin'?
395
00:09:54,014 --> 00:09:55,014
>> early: well, q's a main
396
00:09:55,016 --> 00:09:56,010
Character, ain't he?
397
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:57,018
And that comes out of the front
398
00:09:57,020 --> 00:09:57,028
Main.
399
00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:59,000
>> rusty: q ain't the
400
00:09:59,002 --> 00:09:59,016
Character.
401
00:09:59,018 --> 00:10:00,016
James bond is the one --
402
00:10:00,018 --> 00:10:01,024
>> early: obviously james bond
403
00:10:01,026 --> 00:10:02,029
Is a main character, damn it!
404
00:10:03,001 --> 00:10:04,002
>> guys, guys.
405
00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:05,021
Guys, you're killing the vibe in
406
00:10:05,023 --> 00:10:06,005
Here.
407
00:10:06,007 --> 00:10:07,024
That speaker's only for dialogue
408
00:10:07,026 --> 00:10:09,014
Coming from behind, and you guys
409
00:10:09,016 --> 00:10:10,025
Have it routed through the
410
00:10:10,027 --> 00:10:12,008
Subwoofer somehow, which is
411
00:10:12,010 --> 00:10:13,027
Blowing off all the highs, which
412
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:15,017
I'm not even gonna get into that
413
00:10:15,019 --> 00:10:16,019
With you right now.
414
00:10:16,021 --> 00:10:18,003
Just give me 15 minutes.
415
00:10:18,005 --> 00:10:19,004
I'll work on it.
416
00:10:19,006 --> 00:10:20,009
>> who even cares?
417
00:10:20,011 --> 00:10:23,024
Life is merely a fantasy draped
418
00:10:23,026 --> 00:10:25,016
In confusion.
419
00:10:25,018 --> 00:10:28,001
The curtain is yanked back from
420
00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:28,019
The charade!
421
00:10:28,021 --> 00:10:29,012
[ knock on door ]
422
00:10:29,014 --> 00:10:30,015
>> early: would you grab my
423
00:10:30,017 --> 00:10:31,021
Skull bong from the reverend,
424
00:10:31,023 --> 00:10:33,027
Please?
425
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,002
>> sheriff: yeah.
426
00:10:35,004 --> 00:10:39,006
Uh, rapture got, uh, called off.
427
00:10:39,008 --> 00:10:39,029
Uh, early...
428
00:10:40,001 --> 00:10:40,028
[ clears throat ]
429
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,013
You think we might be able to
430
00:10:42,015 --> 00:10:44,027
Borrow some clothes, here?
431
00:10:44,029 --> 00:10:46,003
>> early: here you go.
432
00:10:46,005 --> 00:10:47,018
Outdated laptop -- cover them
433
00:10:47,020 --> 00:10:48,017
Things with that.
434
00:10:48,019 --> 00:10:49,025
>> sheriff: wait, early.
435
00:10:49,027 --> 00:10:51,013
What are you watchin' in there?
436
00:10:51,015 --> 00:10:52,011
Is that, uh...
437
00:10:52,013 --> 00:10:54,003
>> early: "Shrek 2."
26228
