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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:06,010 [static] 2 00:00:06,012 --> 00:00:11,022 - ♪ my dreams are all dead And buried ♪ 3 00:00:11,024 --> 00:00:16,026 ♪ sometimes I wish the sun Would just explode ♪ 4 00:00:16,028 --> 00:00:21,027 ♪ when god comes and calls me To his kingdom ♪ 5 00:00:21,029 --> 00:00:25,010 ♪ I'll take all ya Sons of bitches when I go ♪ 6 00:00:25,012 --> 00:00:28,016 ♪ oh oh oh 7 00:00:28,018 --> 00:00:30,021 - my turn. - hell, no. 8 00:00:30,023 --> 00:00:31,029 - hey man, lemme drive That thing! Come on! 9 00:00:32,001 --> 00:00:33,016 - do not touch the trim! 10 00:00:35,010 --> 00:00:36,011 [farting] 11 00:00:36,013 --> 00:00:40,004 - ohh! 12 00:00:40,006 --> 00:00:42,004 Oh... 13 00:00:45,013 --> 00:00:49,008 [farting] 14 00:00:49,010 --> 00:00:51,028 - smells like a dang egg Or something. 15 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:54,014 - can I speak with you For a minute? 16 00:00:54,016 --> 00:00:57,003 This flatulence is Off the charts, 17 00:00:57,005 --> 00:00:59,000 And we don't even know Where the gas is coming from. 18 00:00:59,002 --> 00:01:00,028 - whoopee! 19 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:02,007 - her dementia is Getting so bad, 20 00:01:02,009 --> 00:01:03,027 She's blaming it on me. 21 00:01:03,029 --> 00:01:06,019 - oh, doctor, why are you Doing this? 22 00:01:06,021 --> 00:01:08,005 - sorry, mrs. Cuyler. - hey, doctor. 23 00:01:08,007 --> 00:01:09,026 - uh, I'm sorry. 24 00:01:09,028 --> 00:01:11,015 - doctor, be a professional. - come on now. 25 00:01:11,017 --> 00:01:13,017 - this is very serious. 26 00:01:13,019 --> 00:01:16,017 She's gaining and losing weight At an impossible pace. 27 00:01:16,019 --> 00:01:19,016 - this is just Water retention. 28 00:01:19,018 --> 00:01:21,017 - this can only mean one thing. 29 00:01:21,019 --> 00:01:23,021 She needs a new gall... Glabber. 30 00:01:23,023 --> 00:01:25,019 Gambler. 31 00:01:25,021 --> 00:01:27,029 I mean, don't you think so? 32 00:01:28,001 --> 00:01:29,013 - you just blinked As I said that. 33 00:01:29,015 --> 00:01:31,011 - what you telling me is 34 00:01:31,013 --> 00:01:33,009 We gonna probably have to call On jesus 35 00:01:33,011 --> 00:01:36,001 To use his heavenly powers To heal her? 36 00:01:36,003 --> 00:01:38,024 - I'm saying that I need to cut Her open with tools 37 00:01:38,026 --> 00:01:41,002 And give her a new gall... Glab--glabber. 38 00:01:41,004 --> 00:01:43,029 Smasher. 39 00:01:44,001 --> 00:01:47,006 - jesus, lord, I humbly ask 40 00:01:47,008 --> 00:01:50,019 That you drive the demons 41 00:01:50,021 --> 00:01:53,014 From this wrinkly, Undesirable body. 42 00:01:53,016 --> 00:01:55,006 - oh, heal me, lord. 43 00:01:55,008 --> 00:01:58,005 - I command you, satan! 44 00:01:58,007 --> 00:02:00,007 Begone! 45 00:02:00,009 --> 00:02:01,023 - oh, son of a... 46 00:02:01,025 --> 00:02:05,017 - now, walk to me. 47 00:02:05,019 --> 00:02:08,013 - aah...Oh! 48 00:02:08,015 --> 00:02:10,008 - the bunions... 49 00:02:10,010 --> 00:02:12,001 Have been exorcised! 50 00:02:12,003 --> 00:02:13,018 - all right, granny! 51 00:02:13,020 --> 00:02:15,019 - I'm bunion free, jesus. 52 00:02:15,021 --> 00:02:17,018 - them bunions was fine. Hell, they looked good. 53 00:02:17,020 --> 00:02:18,028 The damn gall bladder's what Turned on her. 54 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:20,028 Fix the damn gall bladder. 55 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,013 - well, I'm really more Of a foot specialist. 56 00:02:23,015 --> 00:02:26,016 I'd help you if I could. 57 00:02:26,018 --> 00:02:27,029 - this one here is gonna help. 58 00:02:28,001 --> 00:02:29,025 Now whip out that damn Gall bladder, 59 00:02:29,027 --> 00:02:31,014 Or we're gonna scrape The sumbitch off the wall. 60 00:02:31,016 --> 00:02:33,014 - mr. Cuyler, he's not A blood relative, is he? 61 00:02:33,016 --> 00:02:36,018 - lord, no! You're an insane man! 62 00:02:36,020 --> 00:02:38,014 - I'm afraid you need A gall bladder 63 00:02:38,016 --> 00:02:40,008 From your own family. 64 00:02:40,010 --> 00:02:42,007 - well, why didn't you say so? 65 00:02:42,009 --> 00:02:44,004 Hell, we got a gall bladder Right here... 66 00:02:44,006 --> 00:02:46,022 Encased inside this bitch. 67 00:02:46,024 --> 00:02:48,028 - she's filled with smoke. 68 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:52,001 Check it out. 69 00:02:52,003 --> 00:02:54,001 The blood that we did find is Riddled with hepatitis d, 70 00:02:54,003 --> 00:02:57,000 Which I didn't even know Existed. 71 00:02:57,002 --> 00:03:00,003 And that... I don't even Know what that is. 72 00:03:00,005 --> 00:03:03,027 - so you saying we probably Gonna have to call on jesus 73 00:03:03,029 --> 00:03:05,027 To use his heavenly powers-- 74 00:03:05,029 --> 00:03:08,010 - I'm saying we might need A different donor. 75 00:03:08,012 --> 00:03:10,024 - hmm... 76 00:03:10,026 --> 00:03:12,020 - you're in fairly good shape. Why don't you-- 77 00:03:12,022 --> 00:03:14,029 - whoa, whoa, whoa! 78 00:03:15,001 --> 00:03:17,016 So you are gay, and you wantin' To sleep with me and date me? 79 00:03:17,018 --> 00:03:19,001 Is that it? - I, uh--I did-- 80 00:03:19,003 --> 00:03:20,020 - don't you be gaynatin' him. 81 00:03:20,022 --> 00:03:22,002 - you trying to transmogrify me Into one of y'all? 82 00:03:22,004 --> 00:03:23,025 - I just did-- 83 00:03:23,027 --> 00:03:25,008 - hell, no. Uh-uh. I ain't that way. 84 00:03:25,010 --> 00:03:28,004 - I do not want to date you, Sir. 85 00:03:28,006 --> 00:03:30,021 - oh! So you sayin' You just want the sex. 86 00:03:30,023 --> 00:03:32,016 - I'm saying that you may be The perfect donor 87 00:03:32,018 --> 00:03:36,006 For your moth-- 88 00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:38,014 Grand--, uh... 89 00:03:38,016 --> 00:03:40,013 - that old bat? 90 00:03:40,015 --> 00:03:42,015 [sighs] 91 00:03:42,017 --> 00:03:45,022 She is so special to me. 92 00:03:45,024 --> 00:03:48,027 She is the very glue that holds This here family together. 93 00:03:48,029 --> 00:03:51,014 We'd be lost without her. 94 00:03:51,016 --> 00:03:54,011 Uh, then again, I am busy. 95 00:03:54,013 --> 00:03:56,027 See, I'm a-fabricatin' me A whistle. 96 00:03:56,029 --> 00:04:00,011 [blows air] 97 00:04:00,013 --> 00:04:02,005 It don't work yet. 98 00:04:02,007 --> 00:04:03,011 - we are gonna save granny's Life, ain't we? 99 00:04:03,013 --> 00:04:05,022 - we? Who's we? 100 00:04:05,024 --> 00:04:07,021 You got yourself a gall bladder, Don't you, big man? 101 00:04:07,023 --> 00:04:09,020 - who me? - it doesn't really matter. 102 00:04:09,022 --> 00:04:11,011 See, you don't have insurance, 103 00:04:11,013 --> 00:04:14,003 And the cost of a gall Bladderoscomy is, uh... 104 00:04:14,005 --> 00:04:16,022 Cost is... 105 00:04:16,024 --> 00:04:19,010 Big man have strong money. 106 00:04:19,012 --> 00:04:21,020 - uh-oh. 107 00:04:21,022 --> 00:04:23,001 - granny needs us, daddy. 108 00:04:23,003 --> 00:04:24,013 We got to find the money. 109 00:04:24,015 --> 00:04:26,009 - you're right, son, 110 00:04:26,011 --> 00:04:28,010 But that's gonna Take a lot of work, 111 00:04:28,012 --> 00:04:29,016 And we gonna need us A lot of help. 112 00:04:32,017 --> 00:04:34,016 [speaking spanish] 113 00:04:34,018 --> 00:04:37,001 - oh! Oh! Get the hell off! 114 00:04:37,003 --> 00:04:38,028 Get your ass away From my scooter. 115 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,002 I ain't pickin' up. Hell, I'm droppin' off. 116 00:04:41,004 --> 00:04:43,011 - don't leave me, early. I'm ill. 117 00:04:43,013 --> 00:04:45,015 - now, granny, how do you Expect to get better 118 00:04:45,017 --> 00:04:47,008 If you don't get out here And work your ass off 119 00:04:47,010 --> 00:04:49,007 To make the money check To get the pay 120 00:04:49,009 --> 00:04:52,019 To pay for operation To make you better? 121 00:04:52,021 --> 00:04:54,005 - did you just hear a pop? 122 00:04:54,007 --> 00:04:56,027 - me? Unh-unh. 123 00:04:56,029 --> 00:04:58,015 Now don't you hop that Saggy ass home, 124 00:04:58,017 --> 00:05:01,012 Unless you bring A ben franklin with you. 125 00:05:01,014 --> 00:05:02,020 I need me some money! 126 00:05:04,025 --> 00:05:07,022 [speaking spanish] 127 00:05:28,016 --> 00:05:30,010 - easy, muchachos. 128 00:05:30,012 --> 00:05:33,011 You're crushing my walker. 129 00:05:33,013 --> 00:05:35,004 - well, hell, you said family. 130 00:05:35,006 --> 00:05:37,019 - I said blood relatives. 131 00:05:37,021 --> 00:05:39,003 - aw, damn it. Back her out, terry. 132 00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:40,020 - wait. 133 00:05:40,022 --> 00:05:43,002 When's molly hatchet come on? 134 00:05:43,004 --> 00:05:45,001 - why, so you can bed down With the rhythm section again? 135 00:05:45,003 --> 00:05:46,009 Get her out of here, terry! 136 00:05:46,011 --> 00:05:48,000 Take her from my sight! 137 00:05:48,002 --> 00:05:49,017 - oh, I knew You couldn't afford 138 00:05:49,019 --> 00:05:51,008 No molly hatchet Tickets. 139 00:05:51,010 --> 00:05:53,010 Asshole. 140 00:05:53,012 --> 00:05:55,015 - you better watch that mouth, Girl. 141 00:05:55,017 --> 00:05:57,028 Be careful, terry. You carry my heart. 142 00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:01,001 - I woke up in north korea-- 143 00:06:01,003 --> 00:06:05,015 Some little fella trying to Grind my head into a powder. 144 00:06:05,017 --> 00:06:09,011 Said rubbing it on himself Would help him get it up. 145 00:06:09,013 --> 00:06:11,018 Said it in korean, of course. 146 00:06:11,020 --> 00:06:14,003 - oh, that's terrible. 147 00:06:14,005 --> 00:06:17,004 Terrible job you've done On that crown molding. 148 00:06:17,006 --> 00:06:18,021 - is that even mandarin Sunrise? 149 00:06:18,023 --> 00:06:20,019 - no. 150 00:06:20,021 --> 00:06:23,004 My pancreas exploded. 151 00:06:23,006 --> 00:06:24,025 I told you I needed to rest. 152 00:06:24,027 --> 00:06:27,013 - yeah, I'm afraid no coca-cola 153 00:06:27,015 --> 00:06:29,024 Unless you redo that work. 154 00:06:29,026 --> 00:06:31,020 [speaking spanish] 155 00:06:31,022 --> 00:06:33,020 - I don't want The textured look. No texture. 156 00:06:33,022 --> 00:06:36,028 - spoon me out 8 linear feet Of that there jerky. 157 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:38,015 - ain't that there supposed to Be for the operation 158 00:06:38,017 --> 00:06:40,028 For your ma Or your grandma? 159 00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:43,004 - ok, all right, well, then 160 00:06:43,006 --> 00:06:45,013 I suppose I'll have me a box Of them 12-gauge. 161 00:06:45,015 --> 00:06:47,004 - oh, no, no, no. - the hollow points. 162 00:06:47,006 --> 00:06:49,000 - you can use the surgery money. 'course you can. 163 00:06:49,002 --> 00:06:51,005 Whatever's best for your Family. 164 00:06:51,007 --> 00:06:54,004 - I'm gonna go with, uh, Teriyaki. 165 00:06:54,006 --> 00:06:56,015 - are you sure you got Enough money? 166 00:06:56,017 --> 00:06:59,007 Yeah, I think you do. 167 00:06:59,009 --> 00:07:03,010 - well, o lord, looks Like it's time. 168 00:07:03,012 --> 00:07:07,022 I'm gonna settle in And spend all of eternity 169 00:07:07,024 --> 00:07:09,010 Just sittin' at your right hand. 170 00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:11,004 - yes-- 171 00:07:11,006 --> 00:07:13,019 - tellin' you all about that One show I seen. 172 00:07:13,021 --> 00:07:16,016 - yeah, so-- - "She's the sheriff." 173 00:07:16,018 --> 00:07:18,021 She really was the sheriff. 174 00:07:18,023 --> 00:07:20,017 - uh-huh. 175 00:07:20,019 --> 00:07:23,010 - one time, she got herself Locked in jail. 176 00:07:23,012 --> 00:07:24,017 [flatlining] 177 00:07:30,023 --> 00:07:32,021 You think your dad Has seen that one? 178 00:07:32,023 --> 00:07:34,013 I bet he ain't, But I'll tell him-- 179 00:07:34,015 --> 00:07:36,008 - how much exactly do you need For this operation? 180 00:07:36,010 --> 00:07:38,016 - oh, it don't matter. 181 00:07:38,018 --> 00:07:40,022 There ain't no way We can afford it. 182 00:07:40,024 --> 00:07:42,003 - look at your waffle. 183 00:07:42,005 --> 00:07:43,014 What is that? 184 00:07:43,016 --> 00:07:45,009 And it's crying blood. 185 00:07:45,011 --> 00:07:47,003 Oh, can you believe it? 186 00:07:47,005 --> 00:07:49,015 Wow! - big whoop. 187 00:07:49,017 --> 00:07:50,027 - that's got to be worth Something on the internet, 188 00:07:50,029 --> 00:07:52,005 Don't you think? Want to sell that? 189 00:07:52,007 --> 00:07:54,004 - it's still a waffle. 190 00:07:54,006 --> 00:07:55,019 - look, what if I post it Right now? 191 00:07:55,021 --> 00:07:57,027 - hey, keep your hands Off my waffle! 192 00:07:57,029 --> 00:08:00,017 Get your own waffle, jesus. I don't care who your daddy is, 193 00:08:00,019 --> 00:08:02,005 You're a thief in my eyes! - granny. 194 00:08:02,007 --> 00:08:04,014 - how dare you take a waffle From a sick woman?! 195 00:08:04,016 --> 00:08:05,024 - granny! 196 00:08:05,026 --> 00:08:07,029 - oh, don't hurt me. 197 00:08:08,001 --> 00:08:10,002 I didn't tell nobody about you. I swear. 198 00:08:10,004 --> 00:08:11,027 - granny, it's gonna be All right. 199 00:08:11,029 --> 00:08:13,019 We're gonna get you that New gall bladder. 200 00:08:13,021 --> 00:08:15,004 - but I didn't mean to flush you Down the toilet 201 00:08:15,006 --> 00:08:16,016 All them years ago. 202 00:08:16,018 --> 00:08:18,027 - you did what? 203 00:08:18,029 --> 00:08:23,020 - so you're a doctor, huh? 204 00:08:23,022 --> 00:08:26,008 You were always my favorite. 205 00:08:28,012 --> 00:08:29,022 - hmm... 206 00:08:29,024 --> 00:08:32,023 [country music playing] 207 00:08:32,025 --> 00:08:34,025 - what you want? - mr. Cuyler? 208 00:08:34,027 --> 00:08:37,010 Great news. A donor has stepped forward. 209 00:08:37,012 --> 00:08:41,003 Turns out there's another squid In the valley. 210 00:08:41,005 --> 00:08:43,000 You heard me, right? 211 00:08:43,002 --> 00:08:44,016 Perfect match. 212 00:08:44,018 --> 00:08:48,015 He's a squid from your family. 213 00:08:48,017 --> 00:08:50,025 You don't want to know Who this guy is? 214 00:08:50,027 --> 00:08:52,015 - yeah, we ain't got no money, 215 00:08:52,017 --> 00:08:54,003 So we'll see you later, then. 216 00:08:54,005 --> 00:08:55,023 - hey, half price. - what's that? 217 00:08:55,025 --> 00:08:57,018 - tell him half price. - oh, yes. 218 00:08:57,020 --> 00:09:00,004 Also, we will do the surgery For half price, 219 00:09:00,006 --> 00:09:01,006 Which, uh, hmm... 220 00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:03,016 Pisses me off. 221 00:09:03,018 --> 00:09:06,007 [beeping] 222 00:09:06,009 --> 00:09:09,001 Mr. Cuyler? 223 00:09:09,003 --> 00:09:11,026 [crash] - daddy, is granny gonna die? 224 00:09:11,028 --> 00:09:14,013 - son, now there's A time to plant 225 00:09:14,015 --> 00:09:17,003 And a time to plow. 226 00:09:17,005 --> 00:09:19,011 Now, you bring me the good book. 227 00:09:19,013 --> 00:09:21,008 The phone book. 228 00:09:21,010 --> 00:09:22,020 We gonna call us up some Bitches! 229 00:09:22,022 --> 00:09:24,005 - can't you go To your rich boss man 230 00:09:24,007 --> 00:09:26,007 And ask him For the money? 231 00:09:26,009 --> 00:09:29,000 - rusty, that old woman is In the hospital a-dyin'! 232 00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:31,000 And you want me to kill My damn pride, too? 233 00:09:31,002 --> 00:09:32,026 Hell, no! I refuse! 234 00:09:32,028 --> 00:09:34,007 - come on, daddy. Please, daddy. 235 00:09:34,009 --> 00:09:36,006 She's all we got left. 236 00:09:36,008 --> 00:09:39,008 You know, 'til aunt lil Wakes up over there. 237 00:09:39,010 --> 00:09:42,022 - goodness, early, no wonder Your work's dropped off so much. 238 00:09:42,024 --> 00:09:45,015 And I can't help but notice The drinking... 239 00:09:45,017 --> 00:09:47,027 And the fighting. 240 00:09:47,029 --> 00:09:49,011 - hey, and I assaulted that Landscaping crew, too... 241 00:09:49,013 --> 00:09:51,009 Sexually. 242 00:09:51,011 --> 00:09:53,010 - yes, I-I recall The litigation. 243 00:09:53,012 --> 00:09:55,022 Early, of course I'll pay For the operation. 244 00:09:55,024 --> 00:09:57,020 - you will? - of course. 245 00:09:57,022 --> 00:09:59,003 - hot damn! You are a sumbitchin' angel! 246 00:09:59,005 --> 00:10:01,005 - question. 247 00:10:01,007 --> 00:10:05,019 Can we do some Other things to her? 248 00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:09,026 - what we've done is implanted A small computer in her head 249 00:10:09,028 --> 00:10:13,026 That sends electrical impulses To her brain. 250 00:10:13,028 --> 00:10:16,004 Hopefully, this will help her With her smoking problem. 251 00:10:16,006 --> 00:10:17,017 - but she don't smoke none. 252 00:10:17,019 --> 00:10:19,024 - yes, well, 253 00:10:19,026 --> 00:10:23,007 This will reduce Her need to not smoke. 254 00:10:23,009 --> 00:10:25,011 These delicious dan halen High tar slims. 255 00:10:25,013 --> 00:10:29,001 - smoke now! 256 00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:32,018 - that's the stuff. 257 00:10:32,020 --> 00:10:34,024 - y'all fixed her gall bladder, Right? 258 00:10:34,026 --> 00:10:37,015 - yes, we've done-- We're going to shortly. 259 00:10:37,017 --> 00:10:39,016 - what have we got here? 260 00:10:39,018 --> 00:10:41,012 - ah, that's a free satin Totebag. 261 00:10:41,014 --> 00:10:42,019 It comes with the operation. 262 00:10:42,021 --> 00:10:44,021 - wait a minute. Free satin tote? 263 00:10:44,023 --> 00:10:46,027 - yes, for-- [retching] 264 00:10:46,029 --> 00:10:48,007 - the nausea. 265 00:10:48,009 --> 00:10:49,018 - but free satin tote, right? 266 00:10:49,020 --> 00:10:51,013 - for the nausea. 267 00:10:51,015 --> 00:10:52,024 - give me a light. 268 00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:55,011 - but--but free satin tote. 269 00:10:55,013 --> 00:10:57,015 - for the nausea. 270 00:10:57,017 --> 00:10:59,000 - free satin tote! Whoo! 271 00:10:59,002 --> 00:11:01,002 - for the nausea! 272 00:11:01,004 --> 00:11:04,016 [vomiting and coughing] 273 00:11:04,018 --> 00:11:06,020 - smoke now! 274 00:11:06,022 --> 00:11:08,018 - hey y'all! 275 00:11:08,020 --> 00:11:10,008 Anybody got any cigarettes? 276 00:11:10,010 --> 00:11:12,001 I smoked all the ones ... 277 00:11:12,003 --> 00:11:13,023 - three more! 278 00:11:13,025 --> 00:11:14,027 - smoke now! 279 00:11:14,029 --> 00:11:15,028 Smoke now! 280 00:11:26,021 --> 00:11:28,019 [retching] - not worth it. 19592

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