All language subtitles for Not.an.Artist.2023.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264

- Dad, can I talk to you?

- Buddy, this thing is
like a Swiss army knife.

Look it, here's
my coffee station.

- - Dad.
- Hot and cold water.

I can't drink it,
but like dishes.

Oh, this'll blow
you away, buddy.

Look at this.

- - Dad.
- Just hang on one second.

This is for hot water.

I can take hot showers, buddy.

- - Some people when they...
- Did you see this heating air

- grow up like we did
- conditioning water heater.

with a single dad, there's a
time when we set boundaries

and we change the way
we relate to each other,

and it's called
divorcing your parents.

- That sounds ridiculous.

- No, it's important to
me because I'm about to go

to this very serious
artist in residency

that is very competitive.

- I know. I know.
- Like, think about...

I think we should
set some rules.

You can't call me
while I'm there.

- What? Why not?
- You can't email me.

You can't send me recipes,

you can't invite me
to a baseball game.

None of that.

- I won't be. I won't.

I'm gonna be camping
miles away from you.

I'm not gonna bother you.

- Dad. Good.

I won't bother you.

- I have a lot to
do, so that is good.

- Good.
- That's it.

- That's it.
- Okay.

I'm divorced from
my daughter, which-

- Shh, just don't talk.

It's done, hug me and
let's go to the airport.

- It's insane. It's insane.
- Okay. Love you.

Okay, let's go.

- Nobody does this, but yes.
- We did it. We did it.

- Okay, Okay.
- Okay.

- At the residency,

you'll find a bright,
refreshing, clean environment

to uncover your full
potential as an artist.

Learn from the Abbot the
ways of true artistry.

- Rise and shine and
open up your minds.

- Come and
realize your full potential

as the artist you
were destined to be.

- Welcome.

- As
intense as this one.

- Thank you.
- Welcome.

- Much higher
altitude than you would think.

- Yeah, uh um um.

Thank you.

- Welcome, artists.

This is your new uniform.

The only self-expression
here is through your art,

- Thank you.

- not through vanity such
as physical appearance.

The Abbot is very
passionate about this.

If the uniform has become
soiled, please let me know

and I'll replace them
for you immediately.

Thank you, artists. Thank you.

Follow me, grab a pair of shoes

and I'll show you your
cabin assignments.

There are two
studios to a cabin.

You'll find that the Abbot
has outfitted each studio

to fit your individual
creative needs.

Claire, your studio's
to the right.

Alice, your studio's
to the left.

Please respect each
other's creative space.

Incivility will
not be tolerated.

Thank you.

- Hi, I'm Alice.

My project here is to
create an audiobook series

of Y A fantasy
adventure stories.

I feel that to tell
the best story,

I need to get more
personal than I've gotten.

Writer's block, it
really doesn't exist.

It's just a discipline and
we're all here to do it,

and I'm one of those
people to do it.

- I am Wesley. I'm a painter.

I know that I really need
to make my masterpiece.

Look at all this potential.

Van Gogh, he didn't start
painting 'til he was 40

so I think that, you know, I
have seven years on Van Gogh.

- Hi, I'm Kimmy.

I'm a professor and
I am a playwright.

Oh my God!

I'm very grateful because
I finally feel seen

for the first time in my life,

and I can't tell you
how huge that is.

- Greetings, everyone.

I'm Donte.

Quite frankly, to be honest,

everything that I
make is strange.

No one really connects, relates,

or even cares about
what I'm trying to do.

How does that sound?

Sounds good to me.

I know sometimes I
don't believe in myself,

but every day I'm trying
to put my best foot forward

and become a filmmaker.

- Hi, I am Indigo
Mayas Braithwaite.

My mother is Magenta
Mayas Braithwaite.

She's a very famous sculptor.

I am here to step
out of her shadow.

The first time I picked
up the clay I was four,

and then I had my first
exhibit when I was eight.

Of course, that was
a complete failure

so I started residencies
right after that.

I am Christopher, I am a poet,

and I currently live in Berlin.

I will be successful.

I will be successful.

I started tweeting just
silly little whimsical poems.

Really little, little
rhymes, but they went viral

and I got a book deal.

So now I find myself
in this gilded cage.

Do I continue making
my silly little poems,

or do I find trauma

to source deep,
meaningful poetry?

- Hello, everyone.

I'm Claire. I'm a painter.

I was accepted to four Ivy
League schools plus Stanford,

but I decided to take a
gap year to explore art,

and see if this is really
what I wanted to do

for the rest of my life.

As we all know,
art is subjective,

but when it comes to the fine
art world, it's also not.

- Cheers!

- I admire the Abbot for
having a financial incentive.

It shows that he's not afraid

to show the role
of money in art.

- I completely disagree.

I think that money corrupts art.

In fact, the last time I
was at a Christie's auction,

the people applauded the
price and not the Picasso.

- Hey, does anyone happen
to recognize her over there?

Isn't she like
famous or something?

- So help me understand,

you got an MFA in
creative writing, yeah?

- Yes.

- Then what are you doing here?

- An MFA doesn't guarantee
you success in the real world.

- Well, if it doesn't
guarantee success,

then why waste the time and
the money getting a degree?

- I...

- Can we get some more please?

Can we get some more?

I've always said, if I don't
live up to my potential,

if I'm not fulfilling
my artistic goals,
I'll kill myself.

What's the point of living
if you're not living up

to your potential as an artist?

- I completely agree.

- Life is precious.

Why would you even
play like that?

- I know it's precious.

That's why you shouldn't
waste resources

or consume people's time and
attention doing something

that doesn't live up
to your true potential.

I know my true
potential as an artist,

and I intend to get there.

If I don't, I'll kill myself.

- You know they say a picture
could paint a thousand words.

I always ask the question,

how many pictures can you
get from a single word?

And that word is artist.

You know, I first dreamed
of becoming an artist

when I was about nine years old.

I would go visit
my mother at work

and she worked over in the
garment district in Manhattan,

and on the way home we would
pass this street painter

who would paint the most
beautiful portraits of people,

and I saw how much
it amazed my mother.

And I said, "Mom, I'm gonna
be a great painter one day."

I thought that maybe I'll
make the next Mona Lisa.

It'll be a portrait of mom.

But then, my mother got sick

and necessity overtook me,

and I put down that
paintbrush, took my ass

back to the garment district

and figured out how
to make a dollar.

And I became rich, but this
dream of being an artist

kept calling me.

Calling, calling.

I couldn't buy it away,
I couldn't drink it away,

I couldn't fuck it away.

Check out what I did.

I went down to the south of
France and I bought the villa

that Van Gogh used when
he made his masterpieces.

I owned that shit!

And I thought being here

where this great
master once walked,

eating the vegetation
that he ate,

seeing the beautiful
landscapes that inspired him,

I would be inspired.

And I put my canvas up, got
my favorite palette together,

and I couldn't paint
a fucking apple.

And I went back to
my room that night

and balled the fuck up
like a wounded animal,

and I cried 'til
four in the morning.

But after that
cry, I felt relief.

I had a realization, an
epiphany, if you will.

And that realization
was, I'm not an artist.

I'm not an artist.

I am not a fucking artist.

This residency is here to
accelerate the inevitable.

Are we committed
to being an artist?

Or are we just wanna be, gonna
be, who you're gonna be be?

These contracts are binding.

That means you can't break
these motherfuckers, all right?

If you open up the first
tab, you'll find what we call

the artist's pledge, and
I will humbly ask you all

to read it together.

- - I confess
that despite calling
myself an artist,

I have yet to manifest
my creative potential

in a meaningful way.

In the next 30 days,
I hereby pledge

to complete the creative project
outlined in my application.

Upon successful
completion of my work,

I will receive a grant
of 100,000 US dollars

for my artistic career.

However, should I fail
to complete my work

to my full creative potential,

I vow to never again
call myself an artist.

- This contract is for life.

If you fail, no more art.

- Yeah, I saw the X-ray.

It's healing nicely, the
bone is healing really well.

It's actually quite beautiful,

and maybe in a few
weeks you can get back

to your Karate or TaeKwonDo.

- Karate. Yeah.
- Karate.

- Wait, a few weeks?

That's amazing.

- That toe is very infected,

and I think you neglected
cleaning it, to be honest.

- Out of your whole
medical school career,

how many days would you
say it was toe physiology?

- Toe physiology was never
a class in my medical.

- I need a second opinion.

- I don't know if
you can see this.

- Hold it up to the-
- This right here.

I had never seen that before.

I don't know what type of
bugs are around these days,

or like, I don't
know, I don't know

if some bugs have
venom, or poisonous?

- Sure, sure.

Pretty sure it's not
anything to be worried about,

but keep an eye on it, you know?

And if it gets enlarged, you
can, you know, try me anytime.

- I feel like this is, um..

I feel like you and me connect

on a way that I don't connect
with other people. Um...

- Um...

- Even Andy and Sarah,
my parents or whatever.

- I wouldn't say that.

No, no, I, I wouldn't say that.

And hey, can I say
something, buddy?

- Yeah.
- You're a special kid

and everything's gonna be fine.

All right.
- Thanks, doc.

- I mean it.

- Okay.
- Go spread your wings.

Go step outside the
door, all right?

- All right, man.

Uh..

I love you.

- Take care of yourself.

- Hey there.

Mind if I join you?

- Yeah, come on in.

Actually, I got extra hot
dogs if you're hungry.

- Oh, that'd be great.

Thank you.
- All righty. Yeah.

I'm Charles, nice to meet ya.

- Nice, isn't it?
- Oh.

It's just a total reset for me.

- Oh yeah?

- Recently my daughter
kinda jumped into a project.

She's at this artist
in residency thing,

and my practice back in
Portland, I'm a doctor,

kind of has gone south so I've
all of a sudden been freed up

to just do telemedicine
for my regular patients,

which has been a blessing
because I have an itinerary

to see 15 national parks
in the next two months.

- I only visit this one.

This is the only park I come to.

I come every weekend.

- Wow.
- It's crucial.

- Sure. Sure.
- You know,

if I'm not up here
unwinding, I'm gonna unravel.

All right, listen, I'm
just gonna tell you.

You're really loud.

I can hear every word you're
saying on those calls.

- I'm so sorry. Yeah.

Believe me, I must have
had a window or something

and I didn't realize
I was being that loud.

Maybe the echoes of this valley

make it a little more
amplified, you know?

- Sure, that's what it is.

Fucking unbelievable.

Really, that's really something.

You're gonna blame it on nature?

Nature, she's got this
delicate balance, right?

Apologize to the blue scrub jay.

She's fritting from one branch
to the next looking for food,

bring it back to her babies.

Next thing she knows,
she gets distracted.

She's on the wrong branch.

She gets turned around,
abandons those babies.

Apologize to those tiny
skeletons up in the tree.

Apologize to the black bear

and the North American
gray squirrel.

I got a shotgun in
the trunk of my car.

Every weekend when
I come up here,

I think I'm gonna stick
that shotgun in my mouth.

I'm gonna pull that
trigger with my little toe.

You know what?

Maybe this week
I'll use it on you.

Your hotdog's done.

See you around, Chuck.

- - Yeah.

- Hi.

- Is there a problem?

- There is, yeah.

If you don't mind just
stepping outta the RV,

that'd be great.

- Okay.
- And bring your parks pass.

- My parks pass. Why?

- You know, we don't need
to escalate the situation.

Just bring it.

- Well, I'm not escalating,
I was just asking.

- Okay, just go get it.

Okay, so this is so
hard for me to do,

but we've been getting
some complaints about you.

- We're good, we've
cleared it up.

I was a little loud because
I was doing telemedicine,

but I know to keep
the volume down,

but there's no problem.

- Well, the big problem
is you doing telemedicine.

You are not allowed
to conduct business

out of your RV on federal land.

You need to get permission,

you have to fill out all
these papers, everything.

- I didn't know that.

I really didn't
know that, officer.

I swear I won't do it anymore.

I didn't know that.

- I'm sorry, I'm gonna
have to revoke your pass.

- You can't let me...

I have nowhere to go.

- I'm sorry about that, but
you need to figure it out.

Go home.

- I don't have a home.

I rented out my
place in Portland

because I don't have
my practice there,

and my brother, his wife
is not a fan of mine.

I can't go there.

My daughter divorced me.

- I'm sorry, what?

- My daughter divorced me.

- What is that?

- It's a hard boundary
she's setting.

She's going down to
this artist residency.

She's an amazing writer.

It's a very big break for her,

but in this moment she
decided that we're too close,

or I'm cramping her style,
or I can't email her,

I can't voice message
her, I can't text her,

I can't send her a
video that I find funny.

- Okay.
- It's like,

who does that to their dad?

- I mean, I feel
a lot of kids do.

Look, I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry you're going
through all of this,

but I have to do my job,

and my job is to take
this away from you

and make sure that you are
out of here by tonight.

- Tonight?
- Yeah.

Look, I'm sorry you have to go.

- Okay.

- Go!
- Okay. Okay!

Okay, okay, okay!
- Get outta here! Please!

Get the fuck out!

Oh shit...

- The top rolls up.

Those stay flat
against the fucking RV.

- It won't go flat.

- They do go flat.

- Make an L, make an L shape.

Clickitty clickitty.

There you go you fucking idiot!

- Yeah. See.

- "Isabella's
Education" chapter one.

Isabella was a normal girl
who lived in a normal house

with her normal dad.

Every day they made
breakfast together,

they also made lunch
at the same time

at the lunch station.

This was a routine
that they had together

ever since her mom
moved away somewhere

and hadn't come back yet.

So that's where this
story begins, and um...

Stupid.

I mean, this is stupid.

Okay, every day they
made breakfast together.

This was a routine they had done

ever since her
mom became a worm,

which happens sometimes
in this world.

Don't touch that shit.

Still recording.

So yeah, there's this girl,

you could call
her Izzy or Bella.

Her name's Isabella, but
she doesn't honestly care

if you call her one of
those names or the other,

and then her dad,
he is just this...

"Isabella's Education",
chapter one.

Isabella's a normal girl

who lived in a normal
house with a normal dad.

Every morning, they
would make breakfast

together in their little nook.

Uh!

I am a writer and
this is my story.

Uh!

I can't do this.

I can't.

- I knew it.

- Hello.

- I'm so sorry to intrude,
but can I ask you a question?

It's you, right?

Fan Fic Chick with OnlyFans.

- No.

- This isn't you?

I'm not trying to be
a creep or anything.

I hate to be this
guy, but this is you.

You're Fan Fic Chick.

- Listen, listen,
listen, listen, listen.

- I really just
love your writing.

The way you take
these characters
- Thank you

- and you put them
in these roles.

- Thank you, thank
you, but I need you

to keep that to yourself, okay?

- No, honestly, I'm
just, just a fan.

It's nothing creepy or anything.

I'm not like a stalker.

- I understand that,
but I came here

to be someone
completely different.

That person, that person in
there is completely unoriginal

and is using other
people's work,

and I came here to
make my own work.

I came here to look at
what's inside me, okay?

And it would really,
really help me

if you would just leave
Fan Fic Chick out of this.

- All right, I
understand, and I'm sorry.

I'm genuinely sorry for
making you feel bad.

- It's okay. Goodnight, Donte.

- Why, why, why?

- So you have an OnlyFans.

You feel like that makes you
more of a creative or less?

cause I can really see
it going either way.

- Did you just hear
everything that I said?

Could you hear
everything in here?

- I heard you
screaming in your room.

I think I heard you kicking
the walls, heard you crying,

and then I heard most of
what happened outside.

You're a very loud person,
but I think that's amazing.

I really like that.

Do you think I could um...,

do you think I could
see one of your videos?

- Oh.

- You don't have to show me.

- I mean, they're
on the internet.

So um...

- What's your username?

- Fan Fic Chick, and
my most popular stuff

usually it goes cross
franchise or cross genre.

Like, I'll take
Marissa from "The O.C."

and make her have a threesome
with Legolas and Aragorn

from "Lord Of The Rings",

- Right.

- and my really popular stuff

is this gender fluid
Harry Potter stuff

that actually JK
Rowling tweeted about

cause she was so mad,
and that's really

what made me so popular. So...

- It's this one?

- That's the Harry
Potter one. So.

Embers still glowed

in the Gryffindor
common room fireplace.

Candle wax dripped as Harry
said, "I love you, Ron."

Huffing between thrusts,
his strong chest

gliding effortlessly up
and down Ron's sweaty back.

The ears are actually the
thing that I always wear.

That's how people no
it's me, Fan Fic Chick.

Hermione said with
a devilish grin,

you really ought
to be more careful.

Hermione allowed.

I think that's enough.

- No, no, no. I
wanna see the end.

- Revealing a stiff
cock bursting from
her lace underwear.

Hoping I could join
you as I really am.

- You painted a
stunning picture there.

Where do you draw
inspiration from?

- Oh, I just I read my books,

and then just think about
like least likely couples,

most likely couples,
grotesque shit

cause people love that stuff.

- Have you done
anything like this?

Like, have you pegged
someone before?

- Oh no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no,

just only in story form.

Not..hm..hm...

- You're reacting like
it's a crazy thought.

I mean, obviously you've
thought about these things.

- Well, I imagine them,

but just because
they're in your brain

doesn't mean they belong.

I'm not close-minded, I just...

Have you done any of the things?

You're very confident.

- Thank you.

I like to try everything once
just to see if I like it.

- That's smart.

- I would like to try
something for the first time.

Is that okay with you?

- Okay.

- Can I kiss you?

- Okay.

- Dude.

- Hey, brother.
- How are you?

- How are you, Dominic?

Yeah, great to see you.
- Great to see you.

- Yeah.

- Hey, we was just talking
over with Donna about like,

how long you can park in
our driveway, you know?

And we were thinking one night.

- One night?

- Just for, you know, uh, this
is the kind of neighborhood,

and anyone wanna know like.

- No worries, I'll take it.

One night's good.

- Awesome.
- I'll figure it out.

Do you want a drink?

- I would love a drink.

- It's no fun drinking
alone. Not really

You should borrow this thing.

Take the kids out to
Yosemite or Yellowstone.

- If I borrowed this, I
wouldn't let the kids near it.

- You gotta like,
relish what you have.

This is the golden times.

- They worship you right now.
- I know. I know.

We get those moments, you know,

and then there's the rest of it,

and there's an hour
a day making lunches.

- So what?
- So what?

I can't fucking take it anymore.

- Alice, not a crust fan.

- No?
- No.

You know what?
- Not many kids are.

I don't know what it is.

- Yeah, she grew
out of it though

cause she'll eat crust now.

You're gonna miss that
when your kids eat crust.

You'll be like, I wish
they didn't eat crust.

- Oh oh..

- Too hard.

No, no, hey, hey, hey,
hey, Dom, Dom, come on.

- Hey.
- What?

- What's that chick you
were going on and on about?

The one you really...
- Beth.

- Beth.

- I ghosted her, man.

- I didn't know adults ghosted.

- This whole lawsuit
was exploding

and the partners
were on my back,

and I just I didn't want anybody

around Portland for a while.

I don't know.

- You should just go.

- Just show up?

- Just show up.

Sometimes it's just showing up.

- Dom is down.

- I'm always down.

- Baby brother.

- Good morning,
beautiful people.

Is time your friend
or your enemy?

- Dom?

- Can I get a little room here?

I just need some
space for my process.

- What's your process?

- Oh, it's called power poses.

I've heard about
it in a TED Talk.

- Yeah, I saw that one.

- I look at you guys

and you're just at the
start of your life.

You get to follow the dream.

Oh my goodness, I would
kill to be you right now.

I did everything that
was expected of me.

I went to school,
got a straight As,

got into the college that my
parents wished they could have

just like the typical child
of immigrants, you know?

- Where did you go to college?

- I went Ivy adjacent.

- I stand here centered, and
then I go into pose number one.

I take a deep breath in and out,

and I feel real confidence.

- Real confidence?

- Yes.

- Come on Charles, just show up.

You can do this.

You're charming, she likes you.

She'll forgive you.

- Going into pose two.

- My roommate in undergrad,
we both were playwrights.

She wasn't even that good.

I mean, I was better than her,

but she went the
playwriting route.

She suffered, she had
breakdowns, she starved.

She attempted suicide.

- Why would you want that?

- She collected so many stories.

You do not want to
live the safe life.

You wanna go out and
just embrace suffering.

- I don't wanna suffer.

- You have got to suffer.

You've got to
suffer for your art.

You're so lucky you
have your whole life

to suffer and drink it up.

- Ha-ha-ha, slow it
down, slow it down.

That's good.

It's been a while.

Is it a month? No, no.

Hey!

- Charlie.
- Hi

- You guys, I'll be right back.

- Hey, I was down in So Ca.

Man, you look great.

You look great.
- I'm going to work.

- Oh yeah?
- Yeah.

- How's practice? Good?

- Yeah, everything's good.

- Yeah?

Those are beautiful.

- Thanks
- God. You look good.

I...
- What do you want?

- I just wanted to say I'm sorry

for not emailing or calling
for the last few weeks.

- Yeah, that was really weird.

- I know, and Beth, I
didn't forget about you.

I was just swamped and
there was some ridiculous

peanut allergy lawsuit
that candy was processed

in a facility that had,
you know, had peanuts.

- Why are you here, Charlie?

- I guess to see if
you wanna hang out,

maybe... do something.

- Uh...

Thank you.

I don't want these.

An RV is perfect for you.

You can drive around
from town to town,

from person to person, and
never be accountable to anyone.

- Listen, would it be okay
just to hang here for a night?

I just wanna run the engine

and charge it up.
- What?

You wanna park your RV in
my driveway to charge it?

- I'm not talking about
using anything in the house.

I won't talk to anyone.

I just wanna-
- No.

- Oh my God, you idiot.

- All of you beautiful
people are here

to fulfill your potential,
and everyone has potential.

That's a fact.

Potential is a form of energy.

It flows in currents.

You know what else
flows in currents?

Money.

That's why they
call it currency.

Money is pure potential energy.

It moves shit.

Look, I'm prepared to
write a check for $10,000

to anyone who wants
to quit right now.

Seriously, I have a bell
out there in my front yard.

If you go out and ring the bell,

my notary will write the check.

If you think $10,000 represents

more potential than your
future as an artist,

ring the bell.

I mean, it's no shame.

It's actually the
smart thing to do.

Accelerate the inevitable.

Ring the bell.

- I hereby declare that
from this day forth,

I no longer call
myself an artist.

I free myself from the burden
of my unfulfilled potential.

Should I endeavor
to display, perform,

or publish works of
art for any reason,

I understand that I will be
held liable in civil court.

I make this declaration
freely without reservation.

- Now go.

You know, I once trained
with this Olympic athlete

who taught me about
this rule of thirds.

This rule of thirds
can be applied to
anyone chasing a dream

or trying to create art.

And it goes like this.

One third at a time,
it's gonna be all good,

one third so-so, and
one third hard as fuck.

Are you willing to embrace
the hard, enjoy the good,

and persevere through the so-so?

$25,000 now for whoever
rings this bell.

- Excuse me, Abbot.

So, is this number going
to continue to increase?

Is that part of the game here?

- There's no game here.

We're here to find your
fullest potential, not mines.

My checkbook is unlimited.

- Respectfully, but if
the number keeps going up,

what's to stop someone

who has no intention of
completing the residency,

just waiting out the
highest number possible,

and then quitting.

- Oh, that's a good
question, Wesley.

Did you dig deep for that one?

My residency, my rules.

The 25,000 is there now,
but it might go away.

Back to work.

- Claire.

- How can I help you?

- So you're leaving?

- Yeah.
- That's cool.

- This place, it
reeks of desperation.

I cannot be here anymore.

- I thought if you just,
I thought if you stayed

we could just like make it fun,

and I just wanted to
say it was really cool

hanging out with you,

and I wish things could
have been even cooler.

- Things will be cooler for
you Alice, but I need to go.

- I thought we were
special friends.

- Oh, Alice.

We're camp friends.

Goodbye.

- Fuck!

Dad?

- Alice!

- Fuck!

Fuck... Stop

No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

- Are you okay?
- What the fuck

are you doing here?
-- Oh my God.

It's been a logistical-
- - What the fuck

are you doing here?

- Are you okay?
- Are you okay?

You have to leave.

You can't be here.

- Okay, I'm sorry.

- You are not allowed here.

We can't have anybody here.

- OK. I didn't
know that, Allison.

Uncle Dominic said
he didn't have room

for this junk in his driveway.

- What?
- And Beth was super...

I don't understand.

- Dad! Are you okay?

Because if you are okay,
then you need to leave.

And if you are not okay, then
you need to tell me right now.

So are you okay, or
are you not okay?

- If I had to choose, I
would be obligated to select

the not okay option.

I'm not okay, Alice.

I'm not okay.

- Alice?

- Hey. Dr. Marigold.

I'm her dad.

This place is amazing.

- You know that no
guests are allowed here.

- I know, no guests
allowed here.

This residency is the most
important thing to me,

and I am here, I am completely
here and so is he now.

And now that he's here, I
can't unsee that he's here,

and I can't look at his
face without feeling

like I need to help him.

- Would you like
for him to stay?

- I can't in good
conscience ask him to leave.

- Show him to the
east parking area.

- Yes, Abbot.

- Hey, Wesley.

Sorry. I'm interrupting.

- No, it's okay.

Gotta go with it.

- Yeah, um, I forgot
my stylus tool.

The Notary said you might
have nails here or something.

- Oh yeah, there's
probably nails around here.

Sorry, I just.
- No, that's okay.

I really like this by the way.

- Thanks.

I think we're getting to
a place with this series

where it's finally gonna, you
know, rise above mediocrity.

- Trying to be great, you know,

never really leads to
greatness, does it?

- Yeah, well, I mean, you
gotta leg up on everybody.

I mean, it runs in your veins.

I was just gonna say

I think my parents
would be pretty tickled

we were talking to each other

cause they own like, three
of your mom's pieces.

- I'm gonna change the subject

because it's like a
really personal thing.

- Oh, totally.
- But I don't know you

well enough to...

exp...

It doesn't matter.

- Family shit is intense.
- It's intense.

- Yeah, look, I know
what that's like.

You know, I don't know if
you've heard of my family,

but, you know, the Pools were
kind of big in real estate.

So every time I just
try and get people

to look at my painting
for what it is,

they're like, oh, it's
one of the top, you know,

real estate families
in San Diego.

Rich with a B.

It's embarrassing.

- It's difficult.

- Yeah.

- Thank you.

- Have a seat.

Some tea for you.

This is my own special blend.

Yeah, it's hot, and about
36 different herbs in there.

It's good, huh?

- Strong.

- So, Dr. Charles, let me
ask you, why are you here?

- I guess I had
nowhere else to go.

- And you decided
you'll come here,

park your RV on my property,
and just live off the land.

That's your plan, doctor?

- No, the Abbot.

No, I did not have a
plan unfortunately.

I didn't realize that
this place was so serious.

To me, art felt
like a playground

where people were running around

and having paint
fights or something.

I didn't get how severely strict

and heavy handed it could be.

Alice mentioned you
actually sue people.

Like, you go after people.

- Yeah, I do.

There was a finger
painter who came here

and he quit before
the program was over,

and he went and
became a dentist.

Three kids, wife, happy,
and then one summer

he decided to throw a small
art showing in his community.

And I sued that motherfucker.

- Yeah, but how much
did you sue him for?

- Half a mil.

That motherfucker still
paying now, you understand?

- Wow.

- Because listen, listen,
it's not the money, doc.

It's the principle.

Principle is the most
important thing in life.

You know, the principle of life,

the principle of the
sun, moon, and stars,

and my favorite principle
of all is honesty.

You understand that
principle, doctor?

- I do.

I mean, I understand the
concept of honesty pretty well.

- Well, lemme ask you a question
and gimme an honest answer.

- Okay.

- Why the fuck are
you really here?

- Well, um...

the truth is,

I don't know who I am

when I'm not being a doctor,
and I lost my practice,

and I don't know who I am
when I'm not being a dad,

and so I showed up here

cause I knew she
wouldn't push me away.

- That was honest.

For now, let's enjoy
some tea together.

- So I can stay here with my RV?

- Well, to be completely
honest with you, doctor,

Alice is not allowed to
have guests, but I am,

and I'll invite you
to stay as my guest.

- All right, thank
you, thank you so much.

- Please.
- Oh my gosh.

- Have some tea.

- I've had a lot.

- Drink the tea.

This is Dr. Marigold.
- Hey.

- He'll be joining us.

He's a personal guest of mine.

- Can I sit anywhere?

By my daughter?

Oh, oh yeah, I'm her father.

This is my daughter Alice.

I guess that was worth noting.

Sorry.

So where's everybody from?

- It's a silent meal.

- What?

- It's a silent meal.

We eat in silence.

We don't talk.

- Okay.

- Fuck yeah.

- One time, Isabella's dad.

- Are you getting a read?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Your heart rate's going down.

- What's the problem, Alice?

- Wake the fuck up!

Time is passing.

- It's not that hard.
- Stop procrastinating.

Is time your friend,
or your enemy?

- Why can't I do this?

- Something bad happened, doc.

- Oh no.

If you see right here,
like, I don't know

if it was like a fire ant
or something or a wasp,

but like, it does
not feel good, sir.

I'm hurting right now.

- Okay. All right.

I'll tell you what,
get some Benadryl.

Do you have some Benadryl?

You can put your foot down.

- I don't know if
I have any of that.

- Okay, well then
go to the store

or have Sarah or Andy.

- All right, all right.
- Dad!

- Yeah, we're just gonna
have to reschedule, okay.

What's up?

- I've been having...

I think there is a big
way that you can help me.

- Okay, what do you need?

- I'm having trouble
creating my deliverable,

which is a story that I
proposed in this proposal.

So the story is about a
girl who is discovering

that she has these
magical powers

and she grew up.
- Oh, that's good.

- Yes, she's like the
hero of the story.

Like, it's very inspiring.

This is gonna be for
young, young audiences,

and she lost her
mom just like me,

and she grew up with
just her dad and her.

- Okay.

- So in order to win the
hundred thousand dollars,

I need to write from
a place of truth.

And for me, that
story includes mom.

Honestly, I've been I
wonder things about her.

Like, I don't know
much about her,

and I figure, you
know, I'm not asking

for the really big things.

Just like, okay, if you ever
had an experience by the ocean.

- But why do you have to fixate

on maybe the most painful
part of our family?

Like, isn't art
supposed to be fun?

Can't you find something else
in the world to write about?

- It's fiction. She's ...

There are dragons in this story.

- Then write about,
follow a dragon.

- No one's gonna know
that it's about you.

It's fiction.
- Then if it's not even

you or Camilla, then why
do you need any detail?

- I just have to
start from somewhere.

- I don't wanna
revisit it, I don't.

- Then don't read the book.

Then don't read.
- - And if you were a parent

and you lost your spouse,

you wouldn't wanna
revisit it either.

You wouldn't, even for your
kids' stories you wouldn't.

And honestly, we have
a very functional,

healthy relationship because
we don't go into the past.

- Oh, wow, wow! Really?

- Yeah.
- No, that's not right.

- Boo-hoo poor, pitiful me.

Guess what?

The bills don't get paid.

- That's...

- - You don't go to soccer
practice, we don't eat.

That's what life is.

You don't linger in the past.

You try to move forward.

- You're just carrying it all
on your back like a backpack.

I'm trying to put it out there!

- I let it go, you're
holding onto it.

- Oh my God.

- Alice, Alice, come on.

Alice, Alice.

- No, no! No.

- A lot of my friends who
have, you know, daughters

say that the father-daughter
relationship is really fraught

so I feel for you.

It's hard to parent.

- It is single
parent, even harder.

- Yeah, that's something I've
not gotten to experience,

but I would've killed to.

It looks like you are
doing a great job.

- Thank you.

I don't know that that's
true, but I'll take it.

- It is true.

I mean, what kid
wouldn't love their dad

to be there for them
the way you are?

I can't tell you how
badly I wanted my ex

to be the kind of
man that wanted a kid

and that wanted to be with him.

- Can I ask you a
question, Kimmy?

- Of course. Ask away.

- As a woman.

- Yes.

- Single.
- Yes, I am.

- I'm sort of in
this relationship

with a woman named Beth.

We're dating and then I blew it.

I can't stop thinking about her,

and I was just
wondering, as a woman,

is there anything I could
do to sort of warm her heart

or to win her back, or at
least get her to understand

I'm seriously
working on who I am

and I'm seriously interested
in us working out?

- Okay, well, let's role play.

This is what I do
with my students.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

- Oh, I didn't know
you were a teacher.

- Oh yeah, so you will be Beth.

I'm gonna be you.

- Good luck.

Good luck being me.

- And I am going to respond

in the way I think
you should respond

in order to win her back.

- I appreciate this.

- Okay, let's try.

Knock, knock, knock.

Beth.
- Charles.

- Beth, I know what
you're going to say,

but I've been giving
it a lot of thought,

and I behaved very badly,

and I am...

I am so lonely

and barren without you.

And in this moment right
now, looking into your eyes,

I can see that you
are the partner

I have longed for my whole life,

and I am not going
to miss this chance.

I'm not going to leave here
wondering what could have been,

what would've been.

I am going to take a chance,

and I want you to take
that chance with me.

- Yes, Charles. Yes.

- love you, Beth.

- I love you.

I'm Beth and you're Charles.

- Oh yeah, of course.

- I didn't wanna
put anything out.

- Oh, no, no, no.

- This was really helpful.
- Okay, good. All right.

- Thank you Kimmy.
- Sure.

- Yeah.
- Okay. Bye.

- I thought I'll take
a moment to, you know,

check your temperature,
see how you're doing.

- I guess my
internal conversation

is that writing is
an isolating pursuit,

and that's what making art is.

It's a lonely, solitary project

and you have to
still do it, right?

Isn't that right, Mr. Abbot?

- I mean, this whole
time I've been trying

to separate myself from my
mother and my mother's gaze.

Not the friends she hangs
out with, but her viewpoint.

At first I thought that
was what I needed to do,

but now I'm sort of thinking
like art's a conversation

so is that not a valid reaction?

- Am I behind in my journey?

Is there...

It's not a race, right?

- I mean, you're just,
you're gonna be so impressed

with what I've come up with.

At this point, it's really more
about editing than anything.

Wahhh!

- I think that I'm
giving my best effort.

I'm not even halfway done,

but I'm trying my
hardest, Abbot.

- I know that someday
this is just gonna be

considered my early work.

It's okay to do my
"Rubber Soul" right now

so that I can make "Revolver."

This is a small sample of a
larger work that I'm working on,

and I need somebody
to just look at this

and tell me what
it does for them.

- I'm an unqualified eye.

I mean, honestly.

I don't know.
- That's good for me.

No, all I ever have
is qualified eyes

and people trying to make
me happy with their opinion.

I'm looking for
the pure experience

when someone looks
at a painting,

and I think you can
give that to me.

- Okay.
- Great.

- Okay.

I'm at a gallery and I
see this on the wall.

Well see, I like the turtle.

That to me makes sense.

That's an animal I care about.

The sort of washed out red
and sort of lazy bleeding

of everything into one another.

It has a sort of chaotic
indifference, which I find sad.

I would walk past this painting.

Some paintings are
curious enough for me

to go deeper and
go, what's that?

Or how does that relate to this?

This doesn't have that quality.

But again, I don't
know anything about art

so I'm not a qualified observer.

Are you okay?

- Yeah.
- Are you?

Look, but also, you know, I
would get a second opinion,

especially someone
who's qualified.

- No, thank you, thank you.

- Are you okay?

You... what?

Shit.

- You.

It's you.

And this is yours.

- Thank you.

- You can thank me by
keeping this in your family

until the end of time.

This is so that in a way,

I can be part of your family
forever, but just in intention

cause the enlightenment
that we've had here,

none of us that have
been here on this day

at this time should ever
forget what we felt,

and I just feel calm.

I feel like time
has slowed down.

- I want that feeling.

- You can get it. Yeah.

I've done stuff
like this before.

Like, I've gone long
periods without talking,

I've done the fasting
thing and everything,

but it just took this moment
where I wasn't expecting it

to just jump up and bite me,

and now I can just, I can see
it all so fucking clearly.

I have spent so
much money and time

chasing this feeling in my life.

You know, I went to Tibet.

I've met the Dalai Lama,
I met the Dalai Lama

and this was better
than that.

I've followed gurus
and enlightened people,

and, you know, no one in my
life had ever told me the truth.

That's never happened
for me in my life.

Nobody could ever tell me
the truth until your dad.

- My dad?

- Your dad.

- What the fuck
did he say to you?

- Listen, I know that you may
not be in a position right now

to recognize your
father's brilliance.

Accept this painting as an
heirloom for your people,

and let me go do what
needs to be done.

- No.

No.

Fuck.... Fuck.

Indigo.

Anyone of these canvasses

could have been the "Mona
Lisa," or "Guernica",

or "Starry Night", and
now they can't be that,

and that's okay.

- Yeah.

Why is it okay though?

- I think it's so exhausting

trying to live up to
some abstract goal.

- I know.

- I really thought that I
would have no reason to live

if I couldn't make this work,

if I couldn't create
something worthwhile,

but it's just not true.

I have so many things
to be grateful for,

and this has made me so unhappy,

- So unhappy.
- So, so terrible.

- I'm so unhappy.

- My God.

- It's awful.
- It really is.

- But, you know,

I... I... I don't need
approval or attention.

I just, I really just
wanna try and be happy.

- What are we gonna
do with our hands?

I hereby declare

that from this day forth,

I no longer call
myself an artist.

I free myself from the burden
of my unfulfilled potential.

Should I endeavor
to display, perform,

publish works of
art for any reason,

I understand that I will be
held liable in civil court.

I make this declaration
freely without reservation.

- All right.
- Okay.

- Oh, no, no, no, no.
- No, thank you.

- Hey, listen, who would've
thought an hour ago

that us three...

Hi, Christopher.

- Pardon me.

- How are you?

- I'm okay. Do you mind?

- Oh, of course
not. Have a seat.

- Thank you.

Well, I wanted to seek you
out specifically actually.

You know, as a professor,

I think you could give
me some good feedback.

- Okay, but here's the thing.

I'm not a professor
here, I'm an artist.

- Oh.

- But I'm here for you
as a fellow artist.

- Right.

- Let's hear what
you've written so far

and we can go from there.

- Okay. This is untitled.

- Oh, okay.

- I know you watch me sleep,
see how I turn in the night,

view how I dress in the morn,
feel when I turn out my light.

Oh, goldfish, I've
never touched you,

but I wanna hug you so tight.

- Okay.
- Hm...

- That's, no, what I thought
was lovely about the poem

is that I can feel
a sense of sorrow,

a sense of loneliness,
a sense of loss,

and that is quite touching.

It's, it's...

No?

- No, this is comedy.

This is not art.

- A lot of comedians actually
come from a very dark place.

- Oh God, I do not
wanna be a comedian.

- Oh, okay, so what do you want?

- I want to hear
some of your stories.

I feel like you have trauma,

and you look like you've
lived a really hard life.

- I look like I've
lived a hard life?

- Yeah, I mean, you're
old, you're a woman,

you're Asian.

I mean...

- And first of all, before we
go any further, I'm not old.

I'm older than you.

- Right. Of course.

- And being Asian is not
traumatizing like it must be

to be a Black man in America.

- Oh.

- Who's not like
everyone else. Not...

- Right.

- I mean, it's not
really accepted

the lifestyle you may

want to live, right?
- Yes.

They don't want me
to be an artist.

- Right.

- They don't want
me to be a poet.

They wanted me to go
to business school.

- Right, and anything else?

- Pretty much just that.

So if you'll just
indulge me, professor,

imagine I'm in your class.

I'm a student, I'm stuck.

I'm asking you to do your job

and give me trauma
to write about.

- If you were in my class,

I would've told you to
access your own trauma.

Go deep, and if you
can't access your trauma,

if you want to keep bearing it,

then go on writing your
silly little poems.

- I'm sorry this wasn't
more productive, professor.

- I'm sorry too.

- Donte.

Let's get fucked up.

- Cheers.

Here's to not quitting.

- Oh yeah.
- I'm so comfortable here.

I could sit in the
kitchen all day.

- Don't remind me
of the kitchen, man.

I used to have a shitty
job washing dishes

from like one in the afternoon
'til one in the morning.

It really sucked.

- Oh my God, I
washed dishes too.

My parents had a restaurant.

Every time the dishwasher
didn't show up.

Lemme see your hands.

- I always wish I worked a
blue collar job, you know,

just so I could have
some of that shame

just to carry it with me.

I feel like it
could be inspiring.

- Well, yeah, and
you get people skills

by doing these rough jobs too,

which I'm sorry you
might have missed out on.

- Regrets.

There's nothing more
damaging to the human spirit

than the word regret.

It's a burden that we
put upon ourselves,

a weight that we force
ourselves to carry,

and it withers you down.

So I know some of you
have some deep regrets,

but I want you to be
at peace with them

and share them
with me right now.

Donte, come on, man.

Your deepest regret.

You could whisper it
right in my ear, please.

- My deepest regret is
getting all these tattoos

just to be cool and
to fit in with others.

- Brother, that's not a regret.

That's a lesson.

- I regret the day
that I joined Twitter.

- That's not a regret.

That's a lesson.

- I regret giving up
all my dreams for a man.

- That's not a regret,
that's a lesson.

Learn from that.

- I think I need to say
mine out loud, Abbot.

- Good doctor, good doctor.

You always impress me, man.

The floor is yours.

- As many of you may not
know, I'm a single dad,

and Alice's mom, my wife,
passed 20 years ago,

and I, uh...

uh...

I regret, Alice, that
I didn't give you

much information about your mom.

Camilla was her name,

and being here...

has helped me realize

I didn't talk about her
because I was always afraid

of where it would end,
and it was about the thing

I didn't ever want you to
know that you can't know

and I can't say.

I can't, I can't, I can't.

- Charles, brother,
breathe it in, let it out.

- When I was cleaning the house
out after your mom passed,

I found two months worth of
Gleevec in her closet hidden.

Gleevec was the
drug that was found

to be very effective
for a type of leukemia,

which was a motherfucker.

And I ... felt so
guilty for a long time

because I missed it.

I had no idea she
was checking out.

- What are you saying?

- She quit. She quit, Alice.

And I didn't ever
want you to know that.

You were a kid.

You just needed a life,
and we had a life.

I should have told
you a while ago.

I got busy.

I got ...

Alice.

Alice.

- Let 'em go.

- Alice...

Alice.
- No.

- Alice, please.
- No.

- I just wanna, I
just wanna talk.

Alice, please...
- No.

Alice please, please stop.

- Move. I need to go.

I need to go to my cabin.

- You always tell
me I have to talk.

- No.
- I want you to talk.

Are you okay? Sorry.

- Mm...mm...mmmmm...mm...mm...mm..

mmm!

Do you know, dad?

I have spent my entire
life trying to protect you.

In middle school,
you would work late,

you would call me and say
30 minutes, always delayed,

always I will be home, and
then no, you're not home.

I am hungry, I was very hungry,
and I would make us dinner.

We would sit and eat dinner,
not even talk about it,

no acknowledgement.

And I don't say anything

because I don't want
you to feel bad.

And then in high school,

I make no plans on
the weekend never ever

because maybe you
wanna do something

and I should be there,
and I am always there.

I don't tell you things.

Do you know how I make money?

I wear skimpy outfits, dad,

and write erotic fan fiction

and display it on the
internet and people pay me,

and I didn't tell you because
I wanted to protect you.

And now I realize that I
was trying to protect you

with incomplete information.

- I didn't know you were
trying to protect me.

I feel terrible.

I just thought you
were a great kid.

I didn't...

I protect you.

I was protecting
you this whole time

before I told you all this,

and I was making sure
we had everything.

- This is exactly...

See, you're... you're hurting,

and this is what I
didn't want to happen.

I didn't want you to get hurt.

- Okay. I'm not hurt.

Thank you for telling me
about your internet writing.

I didn't know that.

And are you safe? Is it safe?

- Yes. Yes.
- Is it?

- Yes.

- I mean, it's kind
of like telemedicine.

You make people feel
good on the internet.

You're just like me.

Alice, I think it's
time for me to leave

as long as you're okay.

- You have no place to go.

- Don't worry about me.

I'm okay if you're okay.

- Okay.

- I'm gonna leave
and you're gonna win.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- Okay, let me walk
you out here I guess.

- I'm really sorry.

I know that wasn't great timing.

Do we keep these,

or do I return this
onesie to the Abbot?

- Hi.

- Hi.

- How are you? What
are you doing here?

- Nothing, I just,
I'm gonna tell you

without looking at you cause
that makes me feel better.

Um...

I will. This is fine.

I like this.

- Aw, aren't you lovely?

- You remind me of a mom,

and I will sometimes
go outta my way to...

be in a space

that feels closer
to people like you.

So this is your space
where you usually work

so I thought I would come here.

- That makes me feel so good.

- Why? Why?

- I can't tell you, that
is like a dream come true.

- Why?

- Because I've always
wanted to be a mom,

and for you to say
that means so much.

And you're gonna be a
great mom someday too

because you end up
being more of a nurturer

when you know what
you're missing.

Yes, you will be.

I had a friend who
once told me that

you never know

the kind of love that a
parent has for a child

until you give birth
to your own child,

and that always made me so sad.

But I promise you right now,

you sitting in my lap,

I realize in this moment that
you can actually love somebody

just as much if they didn't
come from you as you can.

Just knowing somebody,
and feeling their energy,

and feeling their need.

I think that's why
I love teaching.

I didn't realize I
loved it until just now.

- You do? You do?

- Yeah.

- Because you have so many kids.

- I have so many kids.

You know what?

I think I'm gonna
ring the bell now.

- What?
- Yeah, I gotta go.

- What about your writing?

- Ugh, I haven't written a
word since I've been here.

- What?

What? Are you serious?

- This has been the absolute

most honest moment
I've had here.

Okay. Goodbye my dear.

- Look at you guys
looking all sad and shit.

Listen, don't mourn
those that left us.

Nah, celebrate them.

I mean, it's a beautiful
thing what they achieved.

Clarity.

Buddha had to sit under a tree
for years before he saw it,

Jesus on the cross, me 40
years of trying to be something

that I was not.

Look, you got another
week here, right?

I'll say instead of wasting
my motherfucking time

and wasting yours, I
wanna raise the ante

to $50,000 for you
to quit right now.

I'm available for
one-on-one meetings

in the arts and craft cabin
after our delicious breakfast.

- I am doing so well here

and I would like to ask though,

if I may, for just
a little more time

so that I can fully soak in
your teachings and marinate.

- There are no extensions
here, Christopher.

The contract clearly
states 30 day residency,

which is more than enough time.

- Well, you know what?

I'll just think about it.

I'll take some time.

Okay, yeah, maybe
in a couple of days.

I guess 50,000 isn't so bad.

- No, no, no, no, no,
Christopher, no, no.

Let me be clear.

The 50,000 is different
from the other offers.

It expires tonight.

So either you take the
50,000 and quit now,

or you finish off the residency
for the remaining week.

Donte, $50,000.

Why don't you just go out
there and ring that bell?

- Don't you believe in me?

- Belief is for people who
go to church on Sundays.

- So you don't believe in me.

I thought you saw
something in my art.

I thought you understood

how hard it is for
me to even be here.

People like me where I come from

don't get picked to be at a
residency, and you know that.

- Oh, you thought that
since you're from the hood

and I'm from the hood I should
understand your struggle,

and I should just kinda
like open up my doors

and let you come on in here
and make your way to the top?

I didn't pick you for
no special reason.

My selection of
you was just random

as me picking a
jellybean from this jar.

I get thousands of
applicants every year,

and I just pick randomly.

Alice, I'm gonna invite your
dad to the presentation.

- Are other people's
parents coming?

- No. Just yours.

I mean, if you don't
want him to come,

you could just quit
and take the 50,000,

but he'll be my guest of honor.

I'm very fond of him.

Charles makes me laugh.

- Is this a test?

- Yeah, it's exactly
what this is.

I mean, look, Alice, it's
obvious that your fantasy world

is based on your mother,

and you're terrified to
show that to your father

because you know that
it will hurt him.

So, no better person
to be in the audience.

Don't you agree?

- Greetings, Alice.

Are you okay?

- Yes.

- Are you sure?

Because it seems like you're
about to give up right now.

- I'm just, I'm
trying to figure out

if I'm embarrassed or stupid.

Like, I could convince myself

that I'm any one of
these things right now,

and I'm just trying to think
and decide which one I am.

- You're neither
of those things.

You're an amazing,
talented writer

who deserves to be in a
happy place right now.

We're creating, we're artists,
we're surrounded by artists.

We should be inspired,
we should be motivated,

we should not be down right now.

- Why are you being
so nice to me?

- Because no one's
ever nice to me,

no one ever tells
me nice things.

It's just blah, you know?

- Yeah.

- I couldn't help but
notice you both out here

enjoying the night.

Can I offer you a
map of the stars?

The Abbot is very passionate
about star gazing.

- - Is he?

- Yeah.

- Alice, I have one story.

I hope it works for you.

I met your mom at medical
school at Columbia

and she was an
undergrad in journalism,

and when my first
residency was in Portland,

I was terrified that we
weren't gonna make it,

that we'd break
up, and she said,

"One day you and I are
gonna start a family,

and that's final."

If she wanted something
and she knew she wanted it,

there was nothing
that could stop her.

So, I hope that helps.

Okay. It's dad.

When is that time we went to?

Oh, the camping story.

We went camping in the
Badlands, your mother and I,

and this storm rolled
in out of nowhere, like,

just right over the plains.

And every other camper
in that park left.

Like, literally cars
were rolling out

and we stayed in the tent,

and we both got pneumonia,

which was so dumb to
stay out there, so dumb.

Anyways, this is dad.

Super competitive, some
of our worst fights

were over like
backgammon matches.

She loved pudding, that was
probably her favorite dessert.

She was crazy about pudding.

Hated using tinfoil.

She loved black coffee,
black coffee no mix.

We had bunk beds
when you were little

because your mom thought
we might, you know?

You're most like your mom
when you're mad at me,

and when you're sleeping.

When you're sleeping, you're
both just so peaceful,

and poised, and wonderful.

- Isabella opened
the dusty old scroll.

So this was the secret
about her mother

that the elders had kept hidden.

Chapter 14, "Mommies
and Monsters."

- Yes!

Fuck yeah.

- Beautiful people,
today you will find out

if you will walk away with
a hundred thousand dollars

to further your art, or
leave here with nothing

to never create art again.

Now, I would love to give
each one of you 100K apiece,

but that's only if you have
reached your fullest potential.

It's all or nothing,
now or never,

or as we said in my old
neighborhood, do or die.

You said that you wanted
to remove commercialization

with your verbalization.

Are you ready for that?

- Yes.

- You, your imagination would've
overcome your stagnation.

Are you ready?

- Yes.

- And you, would your
aspirations overcome
your hesitations?

Are you ready?

- Yes, Abbot.

- In that case, let my guests in

and we'll begin
the presentation.

- Thank you, the Abbot.

- That must be Beth.

- Yes, this is Beth, everyone.

She is my girlfriend or
whatever it is you call

when two adults are
committed to one another.

- Hi, Alice.
- Hi.

- I'm Beth. Nice to meet you.
- Alice.

- This is Alice.

Break a leg.

- Excellent.

Now that everyone's
here, take your seats,

and the presentation
shall begin.

- This is a collection of poems

that I wrote titled, "Under
the Table with the Lights Out."

There's a bluebird in my
heart that wants to get out.

But death wants more death,
and its webs are full.

I remember my father's garage,

how childlike I would
brush the corpses of flies

from the windows they
thought were escape.

I say these are my
hands, my knees.

I may be skin and bone.

Dying is an art like
everything else.

I do it exceptionally
well, unlike the flies.

That's my first poem.

- Does that represent your
full potential, Christopher?

- Well, isn't that
for you to decide?

- Only you can judge
your own full potential.

What the Abbot does is judge

whether or not you're
being honest, so.

- I mean, these are
objectively good poems.

There's no arguing that.

- You know, I know you
think many things about me,

but I didn't think you
thought I was stupid.

Plagiarizing Charles
Bukowski, Emily Dickinson?

Total contradiction
to everything you
said you represent.

- You read Emily Dickinson?

- She's one of my favorites.

I'm disappointed, Christopher,

because I wanted you to
embrace your own voice.

- My own voice?

My own voice isn't good enough.

You say you're
disappointed in me,

everyone's disappointed in me.

My parents, my grandparents,
my whole family, my teachers,

that guy who changed his address

after we went on that one date,

and I thought it was
a really great date.

I don't even know
why. Uh...uh...

Christopher... Uh... uh...uh...

I'm not good enough.

I'm not good enough.

Are you happy?

- And that was beautiful,
that was honest.

It was definitely
in your own voice,

but it wasn't part
of your presentation,

so you're gonna have to leave.

- This isn't an
artist's residency.

This is an exercise
in narcissism.

What, you aren't comfortable
with your own failures

so you have to create
these circumstances

by which you can
manipulate all of us

to join you in your mediocrity?

You waste our time
with aphorisms

that you source
from, I don't know,

some middle-aged white
woman's Pinterest

so we won't look at your
low rent monastic aesthetic

that really is no more than
cultural appropriation.

I mean, it's sad really.

God, you remind me of my father.

You know what?

Fuck you, fuck you
Alice, fuck you Donte.

Beth was it? Fucking bitch.

Get outta my way! Move!

- Who's next?

- Greetings, Abbot.

This is a story of
"Donte and Unicorn."

♪ Chimes from video ♪

- Donte, what's wrong?

- Everything.

- How come...

you don't move your
mouth when you talk?

- Because I'm
talking to a unicorn

that only exists inside my head.

- You could
at least try to smile.

- Uni, come
on, my life's shit.

I'm a depressed broke artist
who nobody believes in.

- You just need
to believe in yourself.

- Easy for you to say.

You're a rare species

with a horn sticking
out your damn forehead.

- You're
a rare species too.

How many people
from South Central

get to make animations
at a residency?

I'm proud of you, Donte.

The world needs to
hear your story.

What do you have to
lose by believing me?

- Damn, Uni.

You know what? You right.

I got this shit.

- Now that's the
spirit, and I love to hear it.

Let's go, baby.

- Let's
go uni. Let's go.

♪ Music from video ♪

And that's my film.

- Donte, was that your
fullest potential?

- I think so.

- Donte, is that your
fullest potential?

- I really hope it was
because to be honest with you,

if it's not, and if it doesn't
live up to my potential,

then I really have
nothing else, man.

I just, I just don't.

It's not in me.

- Yo, it was perfect, man,
honest, and beautiful.

Congratulations. You made it.

- Really?

- You made it, man.
- Really?

- Alice, you're next.

- Hi, I'm Alice
obviously, and um

I am here to present
my audiobook novella

about Isabella and her
magical middle school,

and I invite you to put on
your headphones and press play.

- Alice, Alice,
Alice, Alice, Alice.

You made it through the 30 days,

you've created a piece of art,
but do you seriously believe

that this piece of work
deserve 100K grant,

and more importantly, in
front of me, your father,

your fellow artist, and
Beth, do you honestly believe

that you have expressed
your fullest potential?

- Yes, I do.

- So do I.

- Thanks.

- The illusion of luxury

has trapped so many
people inside of its web.

Money becomes the only
lure for their creativity.

This camp was never about money.

This residency was
about creativity.

May this hundred thousand
fuel your journey.

You two are fucking artists.

- Yeah!

- Picture,
picture, come on.

- Yes, Abbot.
- You're free to go.

- Free to go where, sir?

- Head down to the
arts and craft cabin.

- And weave you
another dream catcher?

- Nah, weave one for yourself.

- Oh wow.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Call me when you land
if you have time, okay?

- Okay
- Or not. Or not.

- I will, I will, I will.

- Oh, and I have
sandwiches in here

if you and your
buddy Donte want-

- She doesn't want
your sandwiches.

- Right. Why would she?

You're right. Okay.

All right. Love you.

- I love you.
- All right.

- Have fun.

- Put that check in the bank.

- Uh...

- Yes.
- Bye, Alice!

- Bye!

- We're wearing real clothes.

- I am a real person.

- I just though of
an idea for my next story.

About dragons.

- Dragons?

- Dragons rule! Yeah!

- Ahhhhh

♪ The colors are
built up in my mind ♪

♪ And bleeding
through my heart ♪

♪ But nobody knows
that they exist ♪

♪ Look at my bursting veins ♪

♪ Now do you see the red in me ♪

♪ It's a sign for the end ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Will show you my blue side ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Will show you my blue side ♪

♪ I've been given
my precious plate ♪

♪ Where will I pick my life ♪

♪ And will the fire in the sky ♪

♪ Believe in what I dream ♪

♪ It's so hard for
me to explain ♪

♪ What I will miss to my self ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Will show you my blue side ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Bap, bap, bap, bap, bap ♪

♪ bap, bap ♪

♪ Bap, bap, bap, bap, bap ♪

♪ bap, bap ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Will show you my blue side ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Will show you my blue side ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Will show you my blue side ♪

♪ Only the ends of the red ♪

♪ Will show you my blue side ♪