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1
00:00:00,981 --> 00:00:02,787
[car honking]
2
00:00:17,278 --> 00:00:19,717
"Revival smellin' salts.
3
00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:24,000
To revive, hold two to three
inches on the victims nostrils."
4
00:00:27,711 --> 00:00:29,972
Ugh! What a smell.
5
00:00:30,767 --> 00:00:32,130
Thanks a lot, Vinnie.
6
00:00:32,213 --> 00:00:34,975
We never promised you
a rose garden.
7
00:00:42,769 --> 00:00:44,091
I'm so glad you guys are here.
8
00:00:44,174 --> 00:00:45,898
I-I, I need
your help desperately.
9
00:00:45,958 --> 00:00:47,718
Sally's coming over any minute.
10
00:00:47,801 --> 00:00:50,423
You need our help
with a girl?
11
00:00:50,506 --> 00:00:52,091
What's the matter, Vinnie...
12
00:00:52,174 --> 00:00:53,996
...losing your suction?
13
00:00:54,079 --> 00:00:55,598
[laughter]
14
00:00:55,681 --> 00:00:57,186
Hey, come on, guys,
quiet down.
15
00:00:57,186 --> 00:00:59,267
Looks like our friend here
is having trouble
16
00:00:59,350 --> 00:01:00,870
with his little filly,
and as gentlemen
17
00:01:00,953 --> 00:01:02,825
we should extend him
every courtesy.
18
00:01:02,897 --> 00:01:05,519
Come on, hound dog,
spill the grits.
19
00:01:05,863 --> 00:01:07,604
You know...
20
00:01:09,190 --> 00:01:13,955
...I really like
the way you talk, you know?
21
00:01:15,161 --> 00:01:18,385
It's just like watching
a rerun of "Hee Haw."
22
00:01:19,738 --> 00:01:21,640
Look, I think this-this,
this girl Sally
23
00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:23,381
is getting a little
too serious with me.
24
00:01:23,404 --> 00:01:26,526
Last week, I caught her spelling
my name in cotton balls.
25
00:01:26,609 --> 00:01:28,764
- Ahh.
- That's disgusting.
26
00:01:28,847 --> 00:01:31,006
[Juan] That's the most disgusting thing
I've ever heard.
27
00:01:31,089 --> 00:01:33,237
[indistinct chatter]
28
00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:35,344
That's why I gotta
break up with her.
29
00:01:35,364 --> 00:01:36,670
But, you know,
I know exactly
30
00:01:36,726 --> 00:01:38,108
what breaking up
with a girl does.
31
00:01:38,109 --> 00:01:39,609
Well, you know,
when they-they break up with me
32
00:01:39,631 --> 00:01:41,094
I mean, it could ruin
their life.
33
00:01:41,094 --> 00:01:43,535
Yeah, at least spoil
their whole weekend.
34
00:01:44,802 --> 00:01:47,724
No, I ain't kiddin', the-the
last time I broke up with a girl
35
00:01:47,807 --> 00:01:50,004
she jumped
in the Harlem River.
36
00:01:51,751 --> 00:01:54,896
Oh, come on, Vincent,
I saw that girl jump.
37
00:01:54,979 --> 00:01:58,657
Believe me, very few suicides
wear a bathing cap.
38
00:02:00,365 --> 00:02:01,808
Alright, come on, Vinnie.
39
00:02:01,891 --> 00:02:05,374
I broke up with a girl once,
but, uh, she got over it.
40
00:02:05,457 --> 00:02:07,635
Eventually, she replaced me.
41
00:02:07,718 --> 00:02:09,040
Oh, with what?
42
00:02:09,123 --> 00:02:10,724
A seeing eye dog?
43
00:02:10,724 --> 00:02:13,315
[laughter]
44
00:02:13,398 --> 00:02:15,157
Alright, now listen, guys.
45
00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:17,372
Now, look, if Vinnie thinks
this is gonna be devastating
46
00:02:17,382 --> 00:02:20,359
to the young lady,
well... well, maybe he's right.
47
00:02:20,442 --> 00:02:22,184
How can we be of help?
48
00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:25,010
I figure, you guys being around,
you know, would ease the blow.
49
00:02:25,030 --> 00:02:26,572
There's gonna be tears
all over the place.
50
00:02:26,572 --> 00:02:28,944
That's why I got these tissues.
51
00:02:31,357 --> 00:02:32,918
Now, look, Horshack, you-you...
52
00:02:32,918 --> 00:02:34,760
If she starts to cry,
you take care of it, right?
53
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:36,139
It's all in the flick
of the wrist.
54
00:02:36,222 --> 00:02:37,523
"All in the flick of the wrist."
55
00:02:37,543 --> 00:02:40,356
All in the wrist.
I ain't got no more.
56
00:02:40,356 --> 00:02:42,095
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
57
00:02:42,178 --> 00:02:44,218
All in the wrist,
all in the wrist.
58
00:02:44,300 --> 00:02:45,998
Oh, a young girl's tears.
59
00:02:46,004 --> 00:02:47,845
This is heartbreakin'.
60
00:02:48,488 --> 00:02:49,887
Yeah, yeah, Vinnie,
this whole scene
61
00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:51,580
is very,
very heartbreaking to me.
62
00:02:51,653 --> 00:02:53,613
Is there anything I can do
for you, little buddy?
63
00:02:53,696 --> 00:02:56,197
You cannot get
tears on my shirt.
64
00:02:57,691 --> 00:02:58,939
Now, look.
65
00:02:59,022 --> 00:03:01,206
The worse part of this
is she's gonna faint, right?
66
00:03:01,288 --> 00:03:02,951
So you be there
to catch her, Beau.
67
00:03:02,971 --> 00:03:04,252
Oh, have no fear, Vinnie.
68
00:03:04,273 --> 00:03:06,909
I will cradle her
gently in my arms.
69
00:03:10,348 --> 00:03:13,112
Now, look, you-you take
the smelling salts.
70
00:03:14,819 --> 00:03:16,279
Hmm-mmm!
71
00:03:18,298 --> 00:03:22,005
Why, I see they-they found a way
of bottling Epstein's locker.
72
00:03:25,743 --> 00:03:27,145
No, no, that's to revive her.
73
00:03:27,228 --> 00:03:28,812
Now, look,
when she faints just
74
00:03:28,812 --> 00:03:32,092
just stick it under her
nostrils, two to three inches.
75
00:03:32,175 --> 00:03:34,579
And-and, and, Epstein,
you-you guard the window, okay?
76
00:03:34,662 --> 00:03:36,142
And don't let her jump,
whatever you do.
77
00:03:36,225 --> 00:03:38,183
- Ten-four.
- Hey, Vinnie.
78
00:03:38,266 --> 00:03:39,811
I just want you to know,
no matter what happens
79
00:03:39,811 --> 00:03:43,254
that your concern for Sally's
wellbeing is mighty chivalrous.
80
00:03:43,337 --> 00:03:46,122
Yeah, when, when babies
were given chival in heaven
81
00:03:46,142 --> 00:03:48,340
I got an extra scoop.
82
00:03:52,378 --> 00:03:56,012
Oh, yeah, Vinnie got
an extra shovel of chival.
83
00:03:57,436 --> 00:03:58,807
[knock at door]
84
00:04:01,551 --> 00:04:03,486
Oh, hi, Vinnie.
85
00:04:03,569 --> 00:04:05,551
Oh, I didn't know
you had company.
86
00:04:05,634 --> 00:04:08,432
Do you think we could be
alone for a minute?
87
00:04:08,515 --> 00:04:10,057
Did you hear that?
88
00:04:10,140 --> 00:04:13,220
"Do you think we can
be alone for a minute?"
89
00:04:13,303 --> 00:04:14,763
No.
90
00:04:16,447 --> 00:04:19,350
My friends are always
with me when I'm alone.
91
00:04:20,922 --> 00:04:22,822
That's nice.
I can't stand to be alone.
92
00:04:22,822 --> 00:04:26,194
[sobbing]
93
00:04:28,740 --> 00:04:32,314
Now look, uh, I don't quite know
how to tell you this, uh, Sally
94
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:34,136
but do-do you like
to go down to the docks?
95
00:04:34,219 --> 00:04:35,230
Look, Vinnie,
I have to talk to you--
96
00:04:35,231 --> 00:04:36,781
I like to go down
to the docks.
97
00:04:36,782 --> 00:04:38,219
You know why,
'cause I like to see the ships
98
00:04:38,219 --> 00:04:39,830
go all over the world, right?
99
00:04:39,830 --> 00:04:41,585
Now, why don't you
think of yourself as
100
00:04:41,668 --> 00:04:44,432
sort of like a port, right?
And I'm a ship.
101
00:04:44,452 --> 00:04:47,192
And I'm gonna go from port
to port to port to port to port.
102
00:04:47,275 --> 00:04:48,275
Okay?
103
00:04:48,275 --> 00:04:51,691
[imitates ship horn]
104
00:04:51,902 --> 00:04:52,974
No.
105
00:04:53,058 --> 00:04:55,634
I'm just trying
to set the mood.
106
00:04:55,717 --> 00:04:57,558
Look, Vinnie,
we have to talk.
107
00:04:57,642 --> 00:04:59,945
I know, and, heh,
I'm afraid, sweetheart
108
00:04:59,945 --> 00:05:02,387
this is probably gonna hurt me
a little more than it hurts you.
109
00:05:02,407 --> 00:05:05,344
Yeah, I know that and that's why
I'm sorry, Vinnie. See...
110
00:05:05,428 --> 00:05:06,328
[car honking]
111
00:05:06,411 --> 00:05:08,652
Oh, just a second, Vinnie.
112
00:05:13,395 --> 00:05:14,496
Oh. Excuse me.
113
00:05:14,579 --> 00:05:17,212
Uh, I'll be right down,
baby cakes.
114
00:05:19,163 --> 00:05:21,263
[all] "Baby cakes?"
115
00:05:22,050 --> 00:05:24,639
That-that must be
her mother's name.
116
00:05:25,774 --> 00:05:27,733
I'm sorry about this,
Vinnie, but we're just
117
00:05:27,776 --> 00:05:29,295
gonna have to
stop seeing each other.
118
00:05:29,378 --> 00:05:31,510
See, you were getting
too serious.
119
00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,399
And I knew that when I saw you
spelling out my name
120
00:05:33,482 --> 00:05:35,103
in those cotton balls.
121
00:05:35,103 --> 00:05:35,903
[all exclaiming]
122
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,429
Shh!
123
00:05:39,525 --> 00:05:44,330
And besides, Vinnie,
I-I met somebody else and...
124
00:05:44,414 --> 00:05:46,296
Well, I'll be seeing you around
though, okay?
125
00:05:46,296 --> 00:05:47,710
Yeah.
126
00:05:52,784 --> 00:05:56,157
[theme song]
127
00:06:04,927 --> 00:06:07,716
♪ Welcome back ♪
128
00:06:07,799 --> 00:06:11,459
♪ Your dreams
were your ticket out ♪
129
00:06:11,542 --> 00:06:13,679
♪ Welcome back ♪
130
00:06:13,762 --> 00:06:18,510
♪ To that same old place
that you laughed about ♪
131
00:06:18,593 --> 00:06:20,599
♪ Well the names
have all changed ♪
132
00:06:20,682 --> 00:06:22,818
♪ Since you hung around ♪
133
00:06:22,901 --> 00:06:24,907
♪ But those dreams
have remained ♪
134
00:06:24,990 --> 00:06:27,410
♪ And they've turned around ♪
135
00:06:27,493 --> 00:06:29,543
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
136
00:06:29,626 --> 00:06:31,283
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
137
00:06:31,366 --> 00:06:33,460
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
138
00:06:33,543 --> 00:06:35,462
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
139
00:06:35,545 --> 00:06:37,551
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
140
00:06:37,634 --> 00:06:39,814
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
141
00:06:39,897 --> 00:06:41,946
♪ Welcome back ♪
142
00:06:42,029 --> 00:06:46,255
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
143
00:06:46,338 --> 00:06:48,475
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
144
00:06:48,558 --> 00:06:50,738
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
145
00:06:50,821 --> 00:06:52,827
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
146
00:06:52,910 --> 00:06:54,959
♪ Welcome back ♪
147
00:06:55,042 --> 00:06:59,268
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
148
00:06:59,351 --> 00:07:04,616
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪♪
149
00:07:07,968 --> 00:07:11,492
It's a good thing I stopped her
from jumping, huh?
150
00:07:14,754 --> 00:07:16,756
Right out of Vinnie's window
into the front seat
151
00:07:16,763 --> 00:07:18,771
of baby cakes'
Cadillac convertible.
152
00:07:18,854 --> 00:07:21,443
[laughter]
153
00:07:23,362 --> 00:07:27,025
Hey, yo, hey, Juan, um, you can
get down from the window now
154
00:07:27,108 --> 00:07:29,331
now that the big crisisis over.
155
00:07:29,331 --> 00:07:33,705
Hey, Vinnie, Vinnie,
pushing all jokes aside.
156
00:07:34,175 --> 00:07:36,038
Come here, man.
Come here.
157
00:07:36,121 --> 00:07:38,482
Hey, look, man, it-it ain't
no big trip, man, getting dumped
158
00:07:38,565 --> 00:07:41,226
by a pretty girl
that's got a nice personality
159
00:07:41,309 --> 00:07:43,612
a gorgeous shape,
a terrific smile.
160
00:07:43,612 --> 00:07:46,113
I mean, come on, man, it ain't
t-the worst thing in the world.
161
00:07:46,196 --> 00:07:48,739
- It ain't?
- No, but it is in the top five.
162
00:07:48,739 --> 00:07:50,918
[laughter]
163
00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:53,561
- I gotta go.
- Yeah, yeah, guys, come on.
164
00:07:53,644 --> 00:07:55,366
I think we can get going now.
165
00:07:55,366 --> 00:07:58,297
Now that the big crisisis over.
166
00:07:58,381 --> 00:08:01,210
I mean, Vinnie,
you've had a big day, huh?
167
00:08:01,293 --> 00:08:05,264
Isn't this the first time a port
ever sailed away from a ship?
168
00:08:07,950 --> 00:08:11,323
[snickering]
169
00:08:14,831 --> 00:08:17,371
Speaking for all of us...
170
00:08:17,454 --> 00:08:19,955
...welcome to dry dock.
171
00:08:21,414 --> 00:08:22,811
It's all in the wrist.
172
00:08:22,894 --> 00:08:24,482
[laughing]
173
00:08:33,028 --> 00:08:38,551
Hey, Vinnie, what happened
to the old zip-a-dee-doo?
174
00:08:38,634 --> 00:08:41,270
Yeah, well,
it's zip-a-dee-don't now.
175
00:08:42,857 --> 00:08:44,700
Come on, Vinnie,
when you were a little boy
176
00:08:44,700 --> 00:08:48,402
and you fell off your bicycle,
what did you do?
177
00:08:48,984 --> 00:08:51,398
Well, um, I got Mercurochrome.
178
00:08:52,418 --> 00:08:53,917
My mother, she'd take
a little glass stick
179
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,321
and she would put it on a...
180
00:08:55,341 --> 00:08:56,182
Vinnie, yeah, but--
181
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,617
Sometimes, sometimes
she'd kiss the boo-boo.
182
00:09:01,718 --> 00:09:04,329
Man, that lady, what a saint.
183
00:09:04,412 --> 00:09:07,272
Too bad I ain't gonna be able
to give her no grandchildren.
184
00:09:07,355 --> 00:09:10,318
Uh, Vinnie, I think
we've lost the point.
185
00:09:10,318 --> 00:09:12,240
See, you didn't give up
riding your bicycle.
186
00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:14,664
You got right back on
and you tried again.
187
00:09:14,747 --> 00:09:15,546
Unh-unh! No.
188
00:09:15,547 --> 00:09:17,148
- No?
- No.
189
00:09:17,266 --> 00:09:20,568
By the time I get downstairs,
they took the wheels.
190
00:09:24,962 --> 00:09:27,865
They... They even took
the little bell I had.
191
00:09:29,369 --> 00:09:30,912
Alright, forget the bike.
Forget the bike.
192
00:09:30,995 --> 00:09:33,037
What you gotta do
is think dates, dates.
193
00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:34,823
Now where's your
little black book?
194
00:09:34,863 --> 00:09:36,607
- You ain't seen my black book?
- No.
195
00:09:36,607 --> 00:09:39,250
Oh, it's in my safe,
I'll show you.
196
00:09:39,333 --> 00:09:41,938
Give me one second.
197
00:09:45,693 --> 00:09:46,793
Alright, what-what do you want?
198
00:09:46,876 --> 00:09:48,679
Volume one, two or three?
199
00:09:48,762 --> 00:09:50,722
Uh, i-it doesn't matter.
Volume one.
200
00:09:50,805 --> 00:09:52,196
Yellow pages or white pages?
201
00:09:52,243 --> 00:09:54,283
Just get the book.
202
00:09:54,855 --> 00:09:56,160
[mumbling]
203
00:09:56,243 --> 00:09:58,587
- Here you go.
- Alright.
204
00:09:58,670 --> 00:10:00,511
Okay, now listen, come on.
We're gonna go find a phone.
205
00:10:00,530 --> 00:10:01,750
One or two phone calls,
you're gonna have
206
00:10:01,833 --> 00:10:03,114
women up to your ears.
207
00:10:03,114 --> 00:10:05,795
Yeah, but no taller
than that, huh?
208
00:10:11,699 --> 00:10:13,501
Ten phone calls,
nine rejections.
209
00:10:13,583 --> 00:10:16,044
I don't understand
how that can happen.
210
00:10:16,127 --> 00:10:17,802
[door slams]
211
00:10:22,245 --> 00:10:23,045
Oh, Beau.
212
00:10:23,128 --> 00:10:27,320
I don't even think it's them,
I think it's me, I-I...
213
00:10:27,321 --> 00:10:29,126
...I lost my power over women.
214
00:10:29,146 --> 00:10:30,606
Oh, Vinnie.
215
00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:34,620
Vinnie!
Vinnie.
216
00:10:35,905 --> 00:10:37,186
[Vinnie] Pound on the door.
217
00:10:37,269 --> 00:10:38,639
Okay.
218
00:10:52,687 --> 00:10:53,789
It happens all the time.
219
00:10:53,872 --> 00:10:55,094
Sometimes in the middle
of the night.
220
00:10:55,096 --> 00:10:56,511
Yeah.
221
00:10:56,762 --> 00:10:57,957
[sighs]
222
00:10:58,040 --> 00:11:01,101
Now, now, Vinnie, just 'cause
a few women are-are busy
223
00:11:01,184 --> 00:11:04,068
for the next few weeks,
it-it doesn't mean that much.
224
00:11:04,107 --> 00:11:06,827
What about-about Jenny,
uh, Rooney?
225
00:11:06,910 --> 00:11:09,273
Vinnie, she said she's
getting married, Saturday.
226
00:11:09,356 --> 00:11:12,259
Yeah, but I-I
asked her out on Friday.
227
00:11:15,405 --> 00:11:17,343
That's just a coincidence.
228
00:11:18,070 --> 00:11:20,832
No, Beau,
I'm telling you it's me.
229
00:11:23,746 --> 00:11:27,223
Look at this, look at this.
I got a gray hair here.
230
00:11:27,306 --> 00:11:29,509
Vinnie, what's one gray hair?
231
00:11:29,592 --> 00:11:31,631
That means that there's a whole
lot of other gray hairs
232
00:11:31,714 --> 00:11:35,086
all squinched up in my head,
waiting to pop out.
233
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,639
Ah, Vinnie, you're crazy.
234
00:11:40,722 --> 00:11:42,919
There's nothing
inside your head.
235
00:11:45,807 --> 00:11:47,346
Tell me the truth, Beau.
236
00:11:47,429 --> 00:11:49,321
My body, it's gone, huh?
237
00:11:51,790 --> 00:11:53,135
No, it's not.
238
00:11:53,218 --> 00:11:57,189
I should've known the end was
near the day my skin cleared up.
239
00:11:58,216 --> 00:12:00,524
Come on, Vinnie,
get a grip on yourself.
240
00:12:00,607 --> 00:12:04,131
Now, listen... you're just going
through a dry spell, that's all.
241
00:12:04,152 --> 00:12:06,111
Dry spell!
This ain't no dry spell.
242
00:12:06,194 --> 00:12:07,833
I lost it, Beau.
243
00:12:07,915 --> 00:12:11,059
I lost my power of women,
I-I, I lost my magic.
244
00:12:11,059 --> 00:12:12,336
But, Vinnie,
it's not that bad.
245
00:12:12,418 --> 00:12:14,049
[thud]
246
00:12:15,466 --> 00:12:17,727
I'm so depressed.
247
00:12:22,711 --> 00:12:24,169
[indistinct chatter]
248
00:12:29,990 --> 00:12:32,469
Julie, would you take a note
to the principal
249
00:12:32,552 --> 00:12:34,120
of Fillmore High School?
250
00:12:35,155 --> 00:12:37,617
We regret
the unfortunate incident
251
00:12:37,700 --> 00:12:40,564
after last Friday's
football game.
252
00:12:40,564 --> 00:12:44,828
And I assure you,
that every effort is being made
253
00:12:44,910 --> 00:12:47,072
to find your coach.
254
00:12:49,207 --> 00:12:51,503
Hey, Mrs. Kotter,
have you heard from Vinnie?
255
00:12:51,586 --> 00:12:53,727
He hasn't been to school
in three days.
256
00:12:53,809 --> 00:12:55,573
No, I haven't
heard from him, Arnold
257
00:12:55,573 --> 00:12:57,393
but I know that he hasn't
shown up at work either
258
00:12:57,476 --> 00:12:59,339
because the hospital
called here.
259
00:12:59,359 --> 00:13:00,418
Oh, that girl.
260
00:13:00,501 --> 00:13:05,636
That girl, that cruel,
crazy, impetuous girl.
261
00:13:05,708 --> 00:13:09,125
He was her man,
but she done him wrong.
262
00:13:11,115 --> 00:13:12,678
Yeah, yeah,
the girl ruined his life.
263
00:13:12,761 --> 00:13:14,372
She went and ripped out
his heart.
264
00:13:14,443 --> 00:13:16,011
Yeah, now he ain't got
nothin' to hold
265
00:13:16,026 --> 00:13:18,548
when they play
the national anthem.
266
00:13:21,357 --> 00:13:22,457
Look, I-I know he's upset.
267
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:25,521
Well, another contender
bites the dust.
268
00:13:27,151 --> 00:13:29,935
It isn't everyone who keeps
his allure, his oomph
269
00:13:29,977 --> 00:13:33,341
his rugged magnetism,
the way I have.
270
00:13:37,314 --> 00:13:39,777
Where do you keep it,
in your sock drawer?
271
00:13:39,777 --> 00:13:42,975
[laughter]
272
00:13:45,718 --> 00:13:48,062
Come one, you guys, let's go.
We know what Vinnie needs.
273
00:13:48,145 --> 00:13:48,944
- Yeah.
- Yeah!
274
00:13:48,945 --> 00:13:50,773
But he gonna
have to settle for us.
275
00:13:50,802 --> 00:13:52,262
Let's split.
276
00:13:52,367 --> 00:13:55,631
Beau, I think all
you guys are exaggerating.
277
00:13:55,714 --> 00:13:57,994
Just give Vinnie a few days,
he'll get over it.
278
00:13:58,077 --> 00:13:59,999
I wouldn't count on that.
279
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,840
You see, there are three things
you don't get over in a hurry.
280
00:14:02,923 --> 00:14:07,807
Losing a woman, eating bad
possum or eating good possum.
281
00:14:15,923 --> 00:14:17,538
[knocking continues]
282
00:14:17,621 --> 00:14:20,257
[all] Vinnie, we're all here,
open the door!
283
00:14:22,782 --> 00:14:24,370
[banging on door]
284
00:14:29,615 --> 00:14:31,439
- What are you doing?
- Come on.
285
00:14:31,522 --> 00:14:34,804
Just a minute.
Hold your horses.
286
00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:40,688
[knock at door]
287
00:14:40,771 --> 00:14:42,359
And shut up.
288
00:14:47,115 --> 00:14:47,967
[banging at door]
289
00:14:48,018 --> 00:14:49,459
Alright.
290
00:14:53,103 --> 00:14:55,739
What are you guys doin'
in the closet?
291
00:14:57,547 --> 00:14:59,007
Hi, Juan.
292
00:14:59,309 --> 00:15:01,069
I'm Arnold.
293
00:15:01,506 --> 00:15:02,758
Well, I'm Vinnie.
294
00:15:02,768 --> 00:15:05,404
And I'm so very
happy to meet you.
295
00:15:06,713 --> 00:15:08,911
Come on in if you want.
296
00:15:16,205 --> 00:15:18,906
Can I get you something?
297
00:15:18,989 --> 00:15:21,752
I made some delicious
bread pudding.
298
00:15:23,775 --> 00:15:25,537
- Vinnie, come on.
- Oh.
299
00:15:26,717 --> 00:15:29,903
Wanna hear something funny?
300
00:15:29,986 --> 00:15:32,836
I thought you guys
were the Salvation Army.
301
00:15:35,738 --> 00:15:38,240
They're coming
to get my loveseat.
302
00:15:38,323 --> 00:15:41,913
They said they'd be glad
to get it back.
303
00:15:42,111 --> 00:15:45,483
So, so I said,
"Okay, fine."
304
00:15:49,743 --> 00:15:51,427
You know, I-I, I can't
believe Vinnie's bombed.
305
00:15:51,510 --> 00:15:53,647
[Juan] It's a sad day
in Brooklyn, huh?
306
00:15:53,729 --> 00:15:55,254
Hey, come on, Vinnie, you gotta
pull yourself together.
307
00:15:55,279 --> 00:15:56,381
Hey, it's all good, man.
308
00:15:56,381 --> 00:15:58,223
Come on, come on.
What, you wanna fight?
309
00:15:58,306 --> 00:16:00,471
I'll fight ya.
Come on.
310
00:16:00,471 --> 00:16:02,653
Come on, I'll fight any of you.
Come on.
311
00:16:02,736 --> 00:16:04,861
Come on, how about you?
Come on.
312
00:16:04,861 --> 00:16:06,961
- Vinnie...
- Ahh-aah-ah!
313
00:16:08,789 --> 00:16:12,707
Vinnie, come on,
big buckaroo.
314
00:16:12,790 --> 00:16:15,872
You sit down, we're gonna
cheer you right up.
315
00:16:15,872 --> 00:16:17,398
[Freddie] Come on, man.
Get up.
316
00:16:17,398 --> 00:16:19,310
- Ain't you boys nice.
- Come on.
317
00:16:19,393 --> 00:16:22,634
- You're so nice.
- Come on.
318
00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:25,460
Hi, Vinnie.
319
00:16:27,083 --> 00:16:28,545
Hi, sweetheart.
320
00:16:29,226 --> 00:16:31,597
You know, you look
like you're thirsty.
321
00:16:31,978 --> 00:16:33,438
That's enough.
322
00:16:34,389 --> 00:16:35,759
[burps]
323
00:16:40,177 --> 00:16:43,315
♪ Once there was
a little old ant ♪
324
00:16:43,398 --> 00:16:46,444
♪ Trying to move
a rubber tree plant ♪
325
00:16:46,494 --> 00:16:50,894
♪ Everyone knows an ant
can't move rubber tree plants ♪
326
00:16:50,977 --> 00:16:52,156
♪ But he's got ♪
327
00:16:52,239 --> 00:16:53,984
♪ High hopes ♪
328
00:16:54,067 --> 00:16:55,768
♪ He's got high hopes ♪♪
329
00:16:55,851 --> 00:16:57,311
Stop!
330
00:16:58,593 --> 00:17:00,053
Stop!
331
00:17:03,547 --> 00:17:05,935
Now, go on,
get out of here.
332
00:17:06,018 --> 00:17:07,780
You little creeps.
333
00:17:08,500 --> 00:17:10,602
I'm gonna talk to this guy.
334
00:17:11,042 --> 00:17:12,848
Hi, little fella.
335
00:17:13,584 --> 00:17:15,184
Alright, look, guys.
336
00:17:15,267 --> 00:17:16,868
We gotta handle him
very, very carefully.
337
00:17:16,888 --> 00:17:19,058
The guy's in
a very delicate condition.
338
00:17:19,141 --> 00:17:21,970
We should just handle him
like we got on kid gloves.
339
00:17:22,053 --> 00:17:24,015
Come over here, you.
Come here.
340
00:17:24,035 --> 00:17:27,035
Now, look, look. I want you to
stop feeling sorry for yourself.
341
00:17:27,118 --> 00:17:29,460
I want you to get out, I want
you to go and have a good time.
342
00:17:29,460 --> 00:17:31,698
Come on, go out
and meet some girls.
343
00:17:31,782 --> 00:17:35,587
I can't go out
without my magic wand.
344
00:17:35,874 --> 00:17:37,334
"Magic wand?"
345
00:17:40,742 --> 00:17:43,323
Come on, Vinnie, come on, you
gotta pull yourself together.
346
00:17:43,406 --> 00:17:45,246
Hey, hey, you still
have your magic.
347
00:17:45,329 --> 00:17:46,692
And you can go out in public.
348
00:17:46,692 --> 00:17:49,063
Look, Arnold's
allowed out in public.
349
00:17:50,598 --> 00:17:53,100
He was born without magic.
350
00:17:56,267 --> 00:17:59,186
Perhaps he should
stay inside with me.
351
00:17:59,269 --> 00:18:01,696
Hey, Vinnie... now, look
352
00:18:01,780 --> 00:18:04,520
either you get dressed
or we're gonna do it for you.
353
00:18:04,603 --> 00:18:05,702
No!
354
00:18:05,785 --> 00:18:08,048
Ain't there a law against
disrobing a minor?
355
00:18:08,108 --> 00:18:10,130
You're not gonna do it.
356
00:18:12,894 --> 00:18:14,065
I need a drink.
357
00:18:14,148 --> 00:18:15,714
[indistinct chatter]
358
00:18:15,797 --> 00:18:17,817
[Arnold] You're not gonna drink anymore!
359
00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:19,036
Vinnie, no!
360
00:18:19,119 --> 00:18:22,013
[all clamoring]
361
00:18:23,034 --> 00:18:24,870
- Give it to me.
- Vinnie!
362
00:18:26,909 --> 00:18:29,542
A and W Root Beer.
363
00:18:31,002 --> 00:18:33,638
Well, that's all
they had in the store.
364
00:18:42,226 --> 00:18:44,794
Hey, buddy, you can't get
drunk on this stuff.
365
00:18:44,878 --> 00:18:46,297
- No?
- No!
366
00:18:46,380 --> 00:18:48,273
No kiddin', really?
367
00:18:49,692 --> 00:18:52,193
Isn't that a really-really
beautiful picture?
368
00:18:52,276 --> 00:18:54,386
He made fools out of us.
369
00:18:54,770 --> 00:18:58,185
[all clamoring]
370
00:19:04,715 --> 00:19:07,098
[Arnold] Come on, Vinnie, this is
just what the doctor ordered.
371
00:19:07,181 --> 00:19:11,546
A place of laughter, gaiety,
eskimo pies.
372
00:19:11,547 --> 00:19:12,347
[chuckling]
373
00:19:12,430 --> 00:19:15,723
I can't stay in here,
th-there's girls in here.
374
00:19:15,724 --> 00:19:17,067
Come on, Vinnie.
Cut it out.
375
00:19:17,068 --> 00:19:18,329
Of course
there's girls in here.
376
00:19:18,330 --> 00:19:21,352
It is an equal opportunity
clip joint.
377
00:19:22,474 --> 00:19:23,816
It's hard to believe
this is the same guy
378
00:19:23,816 --> 00:19:26,176
who used to spend all his
spare time on double dates.
379
00:19:26,259 --> 00:19:27,330
Oh, I know it.
380
00:19:27,340 --> 00:19:30,452
Hey, Vinnie, you order
what you want, man.
381
00:19:30,473 --> 00:19:31,533
The drinks, they on us.
382
00:19:31,614 --> 00:19:33,268
So shoot for the works.
383
00:19:33,276 --> 00:19:37,741
You can have anything
up to 35 cents including tip.
384
00:19:39,586 --> 00:19:42,132
I'll have a warm cocoa,
thank you.
385
00:19:43,373 --> 00:19:45,734
Now, come on, Vinnie, we're only
trying to cheer you up.
386
00:19:45,816 --> 00:19:47,216
Yeah, you know how you could
cheer me up?
387
00:19:47,217 --> 00:19:48,519
- How?
- Let me go home.
388
00:19:48,519 --> 00:19:50,996
- Oh, come on.
- Sit down, sit down.
389
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:52,422
Sure, go on home.
390
00:19:52,505 --> 00:19:55,127
Watch the mole grow
on your dimple.
391
00:19:58,114 --> 00:20:00,975
Hey, Vinnie, how are ya?
392
00:20:01,058 --> 00:20:02,406
Long time no see, Vinnie.
393
00:20:02,489 --> 00:20:04,592
Where have you been
hiding yourself?
394
00:20:04,676 --> 00:20:06,618
I, I ain't been hiding.
395
00:20:06,701 --> 00:20:08,205
Eh, watch it.
396
00:20:08,289 --> 00:20:11,192
I don't get no chocolate chips
in my hair.
397
00:20:11,847 --> 00:20:14,203
Come on, Marianne.
398
00:20:14,286 --> 00:20:15,899
Come on, Vinnie, you're only
making matters worse
399
00:20:15,982 --> 00:20:17,172
by chasing ladies away.
400
00:20:17,255 --> 00:20:18,355
[Freddie] What's the matter with you?
401
00:20:18,355 --> 00:20:20,478
You don't think I knew
that you guys set that up?
402
00:20:20,498 --> 00:20:21,700
I don't need your pity.
403
00:20:21,700 --> 00:20:23,436
Hey, Vinnie,
nobody set that up.
404
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,403
Look, I'm not blind.
I know my magic is gone.
405
00:20:26,486 --> 00:20:29,923
So just... You know, you guys
are just makin' it worse.
406
00:20:30,488 --> 00:20:32,651
Oh, Vinnie,
I'm glad you're here.
407
00:20:32,734 --> 00:20:35,116
Well, that makes one of us.
408
00:20:36,597 --> 00:20:38,286
Have you got a minute?
409
00:20:38,369 --> 00:20:42,504
No, I'm too busy going
from party to party to party.
410
00:20:42,587 --> 00:20:44,811
No, Vinnie, I'd really like
to talk to you.
411
00:20:44,840 --> 00:20:47,743
Yeah, well, I don't wanna
talk to you, baby.
412
00:20:49,146 --> 00:20:51,587
Now, Vinnie,
maybe you should
413
00:20:51,670 --> 00:20:54,869
listen to what
little Sally has to say.
414
00:20:56,055 --> 00:20:58,057
I heard what she has to say.
415
00:20:58,140 --> 00:21:01,082
"I'll be right down,
baby cakes."
416
00:21:02,166 --> 00:21:03,263
Hey, Vinnie
417
00:21:03,347 --> 00:21:04,807
why don't you come on
down here, little buddy
418
00:21:04,890 --> 00:21:08,060
so you and I can have
a couple of syllables?
419
00:21:09,582 --> 00:21:10,984
You know something, Vinnie?
420
00:21:11,068 --> 00:21:13,722
When you and I got problems,
we listen to each other, right?
421
00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:16,912
- Yeah!
- We sit down, we talk it out.
422
00:21:16,995 --> 00:21:19,561
So why don't you talk it out
with this girl?
423
00:21:19,644 --> 00:21:22,065
'Cause if you don't, it's just
gonna keep on bothering you
424
00:21:22,148 --> 00:21:23,866
and bothering you.
425
00:21:24,571 --> 00:21:26,253
You like her, don't you?
426
00:21:26,336 --> 00:21:27,796
Yeah!
427
00:21:27,938 --> 00:21:31,222
So it ain't gonna cost nothin'
to talk it out.
428
00:21:31,445 --> 00:21:33,554
Now go on, scram.
429
00:21:41,314 --> 00:21:43,797
Look, I'm gonna talk to you only
because my good friend here
430
00:21:43,817 --> 00:21:45,739
Epstein wants me to talk to you.
431
00:21:45,759 --> 00:21:47,661
So, uh, make it fast.
432
00:21:47,661 --> 00:21:50,831
'Cause you don't baby cakes
to wear out his horn.
433
00:21:53,467 --> 00:21:56,047
Look, Vinnie, what I did was
wrong, and-and the way I did it
434
00:21:56,129 --> 00:21:57,914
was rotten, and I'm sorry.
435
00:21:57,997 --> 00:22:00,391
- It don't matter.
- Well, it matters to me.
436
00:22:00,475 --> 00:22:01,796
And you matter to me.
437
00:22:01,796 --> 00:22:03,555
Vinnie, you've always
been honest and open
438
00:22:03,638 --> 00:22:07,438
and you always made me
feel like I was important.
439
00:22:07,522 --> 00:22:09,499
Well, I don't know
how to describe it.
440
00:22:09,582 --> 00:22:11,042
Magic.
441
00:22:12,825 --> 00:22:14,827
Yeah, maybe that's it.
Magic.
442
00:22:14,910 --> 00:22:19,718
Anyway, I... I'd like to see you
again if you wanna see me.
443
00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:28,665
Well, uh, miss sweetheart,
baby cakes...
444
00:22:28,665 --> 00:22:30,449
...remember the night
you came over to talk to me
445
00:22:30,467 --> 00:22:31,773
and I was going to tell you
somethin'?
446
00:22:31,788 --> 00:22:32,867
Yeah, what was it?
447
00:22:32,950 --> 00:22:35,451
We're through. It's over.
448
00:22:43,010 --> 00:22:45,466
Okay, did I hurt your feelings?
449
00:22:46,071 --> 00:22:47,592
Good, now we're even.
450
00:22:47,676 --> 00:22:50,312
Come on, I'll treat you
to a somethin'.
451
00:22:53,865 --> 00:22:56,501
Alright, how much money
you got to spend?
452
00:23:03,883 --> 00:23:06,776
[theme song]
453
00:23:11,151 --> 00:23:13,810
♪ Welcome back ♪
454
00:23:13,893 --> 00:23:17,553
♪ Your dreams were
your ticket out ♪
455
00:23:17,636 --> 00:23:19,859
♪ Welcome back ♪
456
00:23:19,942 --> 00:23:24,603
♪ To that same old place
that you laughed about ♪
457
00:23:24,686 --> 00:23:26,736
♪ Well the names
have all changed ♪
458
00:23:26,819 --> 00:23:28,868
♪ Since you hung around ♪
459
00:23:28,951 --> 00:23:30,957
♪ But those dreams
have remained ♪
460
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:33,656
♪ And they've turned around ♪
461
00:23:33,739 --> 00:23:35,658
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
462
00:23:35,741 --> 00:23:37,486
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
463
00:23:37,569 --> 00:23:39,531
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
464
00:23:39,614 --> 00:23:41,620
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
465
00:23:41,703 --> 00:23:43,796
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
466
00:23:43,879 --> 00:23:45,842
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
467
00:23:45,925 --> 00:23:48,061
♪ Welcome back ♪
468
00:23:48,144 --> 00:23:52,457
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
469
00:23:52,540 --> 00:23:57,375
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
470
00:23:57,458 --> 00:24:01,074
♪ We always could
spot a friend ♪
471
00:24:01,157 --> 00:24:03,555
♪ Welcome back ♪
472
00:24:03,638 --> 00:24:07,207
♪ And I smile when I think
how you must have been ♪♪
34858
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