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1
00:00:10,476 --> 00:00:11,956
Julie, hold all my calls.
2
00:00:12,039 --> 00:00:13,582
I want to eat in peace.
3
00:00:13,582 --> 00:00:15,825
Mr. Woodman, you should've
let me pick up that sandwich.
4
00:00:15,845 --> 00:00:17,504
You shouldn't be walking
on your foot.
5
00:00:17,587 --> 00:00:19,415
Julie, I've been
in the school a long time.
6
00:00:19,470 --> 00:00:22,253
I've learned to live with pain.
7
00:00:22,454 --> 00:00:23,733
If you wanted pain,
you should've eaten
8
00:00:23,816 --> 00:00:25,709
in the cafeteria.
9
00:00:26,857 --> 00:00:28,359
Why punish my stomach
10
00:00:28,442 --> 00:00:31,564
just because my bunion
is killing me?
11
00:00:31,907 --> 00:00:34,639
Besides, I love
these submarine sandwiches.
12
00:00:34,722 --> 00:00:35,980
They give you
a two-pound sandwich
13
00:00:36,063 --> 00:00:37,651
for 89 cents.
14
00:00:38,775 --> 00:00:41,329
All that for 89 cents?
15
00:00:41,412 --> 00:00:43,523
Well, it's a day old.
16
00:00:45,496 --> 00:00:46,878
Well, don't worry,
Mr. Woodman
17
00:00:46,961 --> 00:00:48,801
when you check into
the hospital tomorrow
18
00:00:48,884 --> 00:00:51,344
you'll get great food,
and it'll be free.
19
00:00:51,427 --> 00:00:54,330
Yeah, but the bed's
costing me $90 a day.
20
00:00:56,034 --> 00:00:58,536
Maybe they'll give you
day-old sheets.
21
00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:02,322
You're a regular
Annie Nightingale.
22
00:01:18,260 --> 00:01:19,957
- Hi, Mrs. Kotter.
- Hi, guys.
23
00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:23,021
Mrs. Kott-air, you know, like we
all know that, uh, Mr. Woodman's
24
00:01:23,104 --> 00:01:25,104
going into the hospital
tomorrow, right?
25
00:01:25,187 --> 00:01:26,206
So, we all chipped in
26
00:01:26,289 --> 00:01:28,231
and we bought him a present.
27
00:01:28,252 --> 00:01:30,334
Aw, that was real sweet
of you guys.
28
00:01:30,334 --> 00:01:32,292
Ah, that's the least
we could do for him.
29
00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:33,493
Yeah, and that's what
we're looking for.
30
00:01:33,493 --> 00:01:36,163
The least we can do for him.
31
00:01:36,164 --> 00:01:40,085
So we was wondering
if you could wrap it up for us.
32
00:01:40,168 --> 00:01:43,890
Maybe something
in blue and white.
33
00:01:43,973 --> 00:01:46,655
You know, to match his legs.
34
00:01:48,610 --> 00:01:49,732
I don't have anything here
to wrap it up with
35
00:01:49,732 --> 00:01:50,703
but I'll improvise.
36
00:01:50,753 --> 00:01:51,995
Why don't you just leave it here
37
00:01:51,995 --> 00:01:54,336
and pick it up?
It will call later.
38
00:01:54,419 --> 00:01:56,559
- What'd you get him?
- Ah, something special here.
39
00:01:56,642 --> 00:01:59,405
Arnold Horshack picked it out.
40
00:02:00,966 --> 00:02:04,251
There you are, huh?
Ha ha ha.
41
00:02:04,334 --> 00:02:07,478
And they're very practical too,
Mrs. Kotter.
42
00:02:07,478 --> 00:02:10,342
Mine wear like iron.
43
00:02:11,425 --> 00:02:13,269
Well, Arnold, they are beautiful
44
00:02:13,269 --> 00:02:14,708
but, uh, I don't think
Mr. Woodman's
45
00:02:14,791 --> 00:02:16,571
gonna be able to wear 'em,
you see
46
00:02:16,654 --> 00:02:19,312
his foot will be bandaged
after the operation.
47
00:02:19,395 --> 00:02:21,838
Oh, Mrs. Kott-air,
it ain't gonna be no problem.
48
00:02:21,921 --> 00:02:24,557
I'll take care
of that in a jiffy.
49
00:02:29,693 --> 00:02:31,353
Hey, guys!
50
00:02:35,077 --> 00:02:36,559
Look at this here.
51
00:02:36,642 --> 00:02:39,265
I got... I got Mr. Woodman
a Get Well card.
52
00:02:39,265 --> 00:02:41,324
And I got all his friends
to sign it. Look.
53
00:02:41,407 --> 00:02:44,229
I bet that didn't take long.
54
00:02:44,570 --> 00:02:47,010
Yes, it did, it took-took me
a long time to go
55
00:02:47,093 --> 00:02:50,263
over the other side of school
where they both work.
56
00:02:51,077 --> 00:02:54,658
Vincent, this is not
a Get Well card
57
00:02:54,741 --> 00:02:57,262
this is an Easter card.
58
00:02:57,763 --> 00:03:00,460
They was out of Get Well cards.
59
00:03:00,543 --> 00:03:02,644
Besides, I like
the little bunny.
60
00:03:02,645 --> 00:03:04,105
Oh, yes.
61
00:03:04,879 --> 00:03:07,342
You know, that probably
is the right card.
62
00:03:07,425 --> 00:03:09,264
'Cause by the time
he get out of Vinnie's hospital
63
00:03:09,347 --> 00:03:10,677
it will be Easter.
64
00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:12,348
[laughing]
65
00:03:12,431 --> 00:03:13,813
You know, Vinnie,
I hope you're gonna keep an eye
66
00:03:13,813 --> 00:03:15,832
on Mr. Woodman
while he's in the hospital.
67
00:03:15,915 --> 00:03:17,898
[Vinnie] Oh, well, this ain't do
what I did last week.
68
00:03:17,918 --> 00:03:20,098
Nurse Bonney, she asked me to,
to shave this guy
69
00:03:20,181 --> 00:03:22,115
for abdominal surgery.
70
00:03:22,198 --> 00:03:23,658
Aah!
71
00:03:27,089 --> 00:03:29,266
Maybe she wanted him
to look nice
72
00:03:29,291 --> 00:03:31,391
for the operation.
73
00:03:31,681 --> 00:03:33,644
No, Arnold, they shave people
74
00:03:33,727 --> 00:03:35,771
where they're
going to operate on 'em.
75
00:03:35,771 --> 00:03:38,404
I didn't know
where the abdomen was.
76
00:03:39,841 --> 00:03:42,387
So, I shaved his whole body.
77
00:03:44,051 --> 00:03:46,379
I bet he was sore.
78
00:03:46,877 --> 00:03:48,160
Well, he wasn't sore until after
79
00:03:48,220 --> 00:03:51,206
I put the after-shave lotion.
80
00:03:52,472 --> 00:03:54,447
That's enough, Vinnie.
81
00:03:54,530 --> 00:03:55,952
Vinnie, if you had a question
82
00:03:55,952 --> 00:03:57,669
you just should've asked
Nurse Bonney.
83
00:03:57,752 --> 00:03:59,073
Oh, no, I wouldn't ask
her a question.
84
00:03:59,156 --> 00:04:01,056
She gives me a lecture,
not an answer.
85
00:04:01,139 --> 00:04:02,532
But how are you gonna
learn anything
86
00:04:02,581 --> 00:04:03,960
if you don't ask?
87
00:04:04,043 --> 00:04:06,946
Yeah, but she specializes
in making me feel stupid.
88
00:04:08,049 --> 00:04:10,704
You mean, you need
a specialist for that?
89
00:04:10,728 --> 00:04:12,403
[laughing]
90
00:04:16,940 --> 00:04:18,824
Hey, Mr. Woodman, don't you
worry about nothin'
91
00:04:18,824 --> 00:04:20,924
'cause tomorrow we're gonna take
good care of you in the hospital
92
00:04:21,007 --> 00:04:23,378
and get you
the best pediatrician.
93
00:04:25,442 --> 00:04:27,306
That's a baby doctor, Vinnie.
94
00:04:27,389 --> 00:04:29,892
No, this guy's a full-grown man.
95
00:04:32,217 --> 00:04:34,320
Julie, I'm worried.
96
00:04:34,741 --> 00:04:36,351
I don't feel safe
in the same hospital
97
00:04:36,384 --> 00:04:37,984
with Barbarino.
98
00:04:38,383 --> 00:04:40,988
Oh, shame on you, Mr. Woodman.
99
00:04:41,072 --> 00:04:44,217
And after the wonderful present
they bought you.
100
00:04:44,237 --> 00:04:45,955
Show him, Juan.
101
00:04:48,123 --> 00:04:50,492
I already got a pair like that.
102
00:04:51,228 --> 00:04:53,383
They wear like iron.
103
00:04:56,759 --> 00:04:59,131
[theme song]
104
00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:09,689
♪ Welcome back ♪
105
00:05:09,772 --> 00:05:13,345
♪ Your dreams
were your ticket out ♪
106
00:05:13,428 --> 00:05:15,782
♪ Welcome back ♪
107
00:05:15,865 --> 00:05:20,657
♪ To that same old place
that you laughed about ♪
108
00:05:20,740 --> 00:05:22,485
♪ Well the names
have all changed ♪
109
00:05:22,568 --> 00:05:24,748
♪ Since you hung around ♪
110
00:05:24,831 --> 00:05:26,967
♪ But those dreams
have remained ♪
111
00:05:27,050 --> 00:05:29,622
♪ And they've turned around ♪
112
00:05:29,705 --> 00:05:31,533
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
113
00:05:31,598 --> 00:05:33,691
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
114
00:05:33,774 --> 00:05:35,518
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
115
00:05:35,601 --> 00:05:37,478
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
116
00:05:37,561 --> 00:05:39,523
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
117
00:05:39,606 --> 00:05:41,699
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
118
00:05:41,782 --> 00:05:43,962
♪ Welcome back ♪
119
00:05:44,045 --> 00:05:48,184
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
120
00:05:48,267 --> 00:05:50,446
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
121
00:05:50,529 --> 00:05:52,536
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
122
00:05:52,619 --> 00:05:54,799
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
123
00:05:54,882 --> 00:05:56,975
♪ Welcome back ♪
124
00:05:57,058 --> 00:06:01,502
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
125
00:06:01,585 --> 00:06:06,741
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪♪
126
00:06:10,464 --> 00:06:11,746
There we are.
127
00:06:11,830 --> 00:06:15,659
Now, see, surgery wasn't
that bad was it, Mr. Woodman?
128
00:06:15,714 --> 00:06:17,873
You know what? When you wake up
and you see me standing here
129
00:06:17,956 --> 00:06:21,660
you're gonna think that I was
the one who did the operation.
130
00:06:22,641 --> 00:06:23,843
You're gonna have a new respect
131
00:06:23,843 --> 00:06:26,085
for Vinnie Barbarino,
that's for sure.
132
00:06:26,105 --> 00:06:29,129
New respect
for Vinnie Barbarino.
133
00:06:32,012 --> 00:06:35,079
This must be that
power suggestion thing.
134
00:06:36,637 --> 00:06:39,661
Vinnie Barbarino
is a straight A student.
135
00:06:42,148 --> 00:06:45,351
Vinnie Barbarino
is a straight A student.
136
00:06:45,434 --> 00:06:46,693
Hey, it's working.
137
00:06:46,776 --> 00:06:49,213
Vinnie Barbarino
is a straight A student.
138
00:06:49,279 --> 00:06:52,458
Vinnie Barbarino
is a straight A student.
139
00:06:52,541 --> 00:06:54,003
Barbarino! Snap it up.
140
00:06:54,087 --> 00:06:55,867
Only the patients
are allowed to sleep here.
141
00:06:55,950 --> 00:06:58,413
- Yes, ma'am.
- Now, pick up these side rails.
142
00:06:58,413 --> 00:07:00,567
You want him to fall off?
143
00:07:04,267 --> 00:07:07,183
Look at you. You are a disgrace
to County General.
144
00:07:07,267 --> 00:07:08,666
If you're gonna be working
on my floor
145
00:07:08,749 --> 00:07:10,091
you're gonna look
like an orderly.
146
00:07:10,091 --> 00:07:12,216
Now, button that shirt.
147
00:07:12,300 --> 00:07:13,693
Tie your shoelaces.
148
00:07:13,776 --> 00:07:15,087
Fix your collar.
149
00:07:15,170 --> 00:07:16,669
Pull up your socks.
150
00:07:16,752 --> 00:07:19,994
- And fix that hair!
- I am so confused!
151
00:07:27,122 --> 00:07:28,985
Now, listen to me,
and listen carefully.
152
00:07:29,068 --> 00:07:31,066
This is your patient's chart.
153
00:07:31,150 --> 00:07:34,131
Do not, I repeat,
do not lose it.
154
00:07:34,214 --> 00:07:35,674
Okay, fine.
155
00:07:37,135 --> 00:07:38,756
Now, take the patient back
to his room.
156
00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:42,141
- Right.
- And don't forget the chart!
157
00:07:42,224 --> 00:07:44,465
Hang it on your gurney.
158
00:07:48,386 --> 00:07:50,584
Hang it on yourgurney.
159
00:07:53,475 --> 00:07:54,434
What?
160
00:07:54,518 --> 00:07:56,887
I said,
"I'm going on a journey."
161
00:08:00,310 --> 00:08:03,173
Oh, she is such a clam,
Mr. Woodman.
162
00:08:07,407 --> 00:08:10,323
[speaking Spanish]
163
00:08:10,406 --> 00:08:13,088
No, I'm not, I'm not a doctor.
164
00:08:13,171 --> 00:08:15,003
I'm not a doctor.
I'm just an orderly.
165
00:08:15,086 --> 00:08:17,458
[speaking Spanish]
166
00:08:18,387 --> 00:08:19,612
Miss, will you calm down.
167
00:08:19,694 --> 00:08:21,488
This guy's suffering
from bunionectomy.
168
00:08:21,571 --> 00:08:23,377
[speaking Spanish]
169
00:08:24,425 --> 00:08:26,732
Just relax, relax.
Come on, sit down.
170
00:08:26,815 --> 00:08:28,275
Shh! Shh!
171
00:08:29,528 --> 00:08:33,162
Now, do you speak English?
172
00:08:35,874 --> 00:08:39,036
No. Do you speak Spanish?
173
00:08:39,119 --> 00:08:40,579
No.
174
00:08:41,022 --> 00:08:43,524
Do you speak Italian?
175
00:08:44,207 --> 00:08:45,667
No.
176
00:08:46,630 --> 00:08:48,090
Me neither.
177
00:08:48,540 --> 00:08:49,763
[speaking Spanish]
178
00:08:49,846 --> 00:08:53,372
Ah, what does it sound like?
What does it sound like?
179
00:08:53,372 --> 00:08:56,442
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
180
00:08:56,525 --> 00:08:58,625
Alright, how many words?
181
00:08:59,308 --> 00:09:00,852
[mimics kissing]
182
00:09:01,973 --> 00:09:05,737
Oh, Weight Watchers, that's...
183
00:09:05,945 --> 00:09:06,803
[indistinct chatter]
184
00:09:06,886 --> 00:09:08,478
[speaking Spanish]
185
00:09:08,561 --> 00:09:10,343
Yeah, you can solve the problems
186
00:09:10,343 --> 00:09:12,583
of the world
with good communication.
187
00:09:14,247 --> 00:09:15,687
Where's the gurney?
188
00:09:15,770 --> 00:09:17,408
Hey, did you see my gurney?
189
00:09:17,491 --> 00:09:18,830
Did-did you take my gurney?
190
00:09:18,913 --> 00:09:19,713
You didn't?
191
00:09:19,796 --> 00:09:21,739
How about you? Did you see...
192
00:09:21,740 --> 00:09:23,805
I'm in trouble.
193
00:09:34,792 --> 00:09:36,848
- Hey, yo, Vinnie.
- Vinnie!
194
00:09:36,931 --> 00:09:38,814
Vinnie, what's troubling you?
195
00:09:38,897 --> 00:09:40,620
You look like
you just saw a ghost.
196
00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:43,078
I think I just made a ghost.
197
00:09:43,144 --> 00:09:45,585
I lost Mr. Woodman's body.
198
00:09:47,271 --> 00:09:50,754
Are you sure he just didn't
go for a walk under his bed?
199
00:09:50,837 --> 00:09:51,837
No. I, I'm telling you.
200
00:09:51,837 --> 00:09:54,241
His body was here,
and then-and then I lost him.
201
00:09:54,242 --> 00:09:55,624
I'm telling you,
if Nurse Bonney finds out
202
00:09:55,644 --> 00:09:56,826
I'm gonna lose my job.
203
00:09:56,826 --> 00:09:59,996
Yeah, man, you might
also get a ticket for littering.
204
00:10:01,315 --> 00:10:04,623
Let this be a lesson
to you, Vincent.
205
00:10:04,706 --> 00:10:07,049
You should always
put things away
206
00:10:07,049 --> 00:10:09,125
when you're through with them.
207
00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:10,668
Alright.
208
00:10:10,991 --> 00:10:12,192
I'm in big trouble.
209
00:10:12,275 --> 00:10:13,386
Come on. Come on.
210
00:10:13,416 --> 00:10:15,178
Vinnie, look,
your friends are here, huh?
211
00:10:15,178 --> 00:10:18,376
Alright? We'll help you
allocate Mr. Woodman.
212
00:10:18,459 --> 00:10:19,681
Look, do you
really wanna help me?
213
00:10:19,764 --> 00:10:21,225
- Sure.
- Sure.
214
00:10:21,746 --> 00:10:23,466
Don't help.
215
00:10:24,006 --> 00:10:25,868
Okay. I got
enough trouble as it is.
216
00:10:25,951 --> 00:10:27,713
I'm the one who lost him,
I'm gonna find him.
217
00:10:27,732 --> 00:10:28,835
Okay, man, we got you covered.
218
00:10:28,835 --> 00:10:31,738
- You do what you got to do.
- Yeah. Yeah.
219
00:10:32,643 --> 00:10:34,325
- You think he's right?
- Of course, he's right.
220
00:10:34,408 --> 00:10:36,947
This is only
a five-story hospital.
221
00:10:37,030 --> 00:10:42,557
Sure. It's only got 700 rooms,
that's no problem.
222
00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:44,701
Sure. At most, it'll like take
him, what? A couple of weeks?
223
00:10:44,784 --> 00:10:47,069
- That's...
- Hey, hey, hey.
224
00:10:48,086 --> 00:10:49,868
Alright. Where do we
start looking? What's the plan?
225
00:10:49,951 --> 00:10:52,111
Okay. I got a idea.
I got a idea. I know.
226
00:10:52,194 --> 00:10:53,972
Lost and found.
227
00:10:54,055 --> 00:10:55,197
That's great.
That's a good idea.
228
00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:56,583
Go there, just be cool
229
00:10:56,583 --> 00:10:58,005
and ask 'em
if they found something, uh...
230
00:10:58,005 --> 00:11:01,029
short, gray, and wrinkled.
231
00:11:01,149 --> 00:11:02,010
That'll be good.
232
00:11:02,093 --> 00:11:05,076
And if they don't have Woodman,
I'll get Dumbo.
233
00:11:05,981 --> 00:11:07,043
Arnold, what do you think
he looked like
234
00:11:07,043 --> 00:11:09,295
when he came down
from the operating room?
235
00:11:09,378 --> 00:11:11,990
He was looking the way
he always looks.
236
00:11:12,073 --> 00:11:14,394
Oh, we better check the morgue.
237
00:11:15,814 --> 00:11:17,137
Oh, I can't, little one.
238
00:11:17,220 --> 00:11:19,982
I faint at the sight of tile.
239
00:11:20,526 --> 00:11:22,086
Then I'll check the morgue.
240
00:11:22,169 --> 00:11:24,149
And you go over
to the coffee shop, alright?
241
00:11:24,232 --> 00:11:25,375
Now, Woodman's probably gonna be
242
00:11:25,375 --> 00:11:27,744
sitting at the table
with no tip.
243
00:11:29,299 --> 00:11:31,102
I'll go check
the nurse's quarters.
244
00:11:31,184 --> 00:11:33,987
He's not gonna be there.
You're wasting your time.
245
00:11:34,070 --> 00:11:36,973
I'll let the nurses
be the judge of that.
246
00:11:43,277 --> 00:11:44,952
[baby crying]
247
00:11:54,530 --> 00:11:56,379
[whispering] Mr. Woodman?
248
00:11:57,654 --> 00:12:00,154
Mr. Woodman?
249
00:12:01,677 --> 00:12:03,961
[yelling] Woodman, is that you?
250
00:12:06,409 --> 00:12:07,953
[humming]
251
00:12:08,890 --> 00:12:11,261
[screaming]
252
00:12:19,333 --> 00:12:21,434
Oh, he's not in there.
253
00:12:22,491 --> 00:12:24,514
[singing]
254
00:12:28,655 --> 00:12:30,137
Barbarino,
I've been looking for you.
255
00:12:30,220 --> 00:12:31,502
I have work for you to do.
256
00:12:31,502 --> 00:12:33,462
Oh, I got something more
important to do right now.
257
00:12:33,545 --> 00:12:36,109
I doubt that you have
anything important to do.
258
00:12:36,109 --> 00:12:38,547
Now, go in there and take
Mr. Saunders down to X-ray.
259
00:12:38,612 --> 00:12:39,674
Nurse Bonney, I really--
260
00:12:39,734 --> 00:12:41,336
Right now!
261
00:12:44,117 --> 00:12:45,799
- Are you, are you Mr. Saunders?
- Yeah.
262
00:12:45,882 --> 00:12:47,565
Good.
We got to go down to X-ray.
263
00:12:47,565 --> 00:12:50,848
And I got to do it quick too,
'cause I just lost a patient.
264
00:12:50,930 --> 00:12:52,829
Well, I'm sorry to hear that.
265
00:12:52,912 --> 00:12:54,112
No, I didn't lose him that way.
266
00:12:54,195 --> 00:12:55,977
I-I misplaced him.
267
00:12:56,060 --> 00:12:58,522
Maybe I-I can walk to X-ray.
268
00:12:58,531 --> 00:13:01,249
- Oh, you can't walk to X-ray.
- Too far?
269
00:13:01,332 --> 00:13:02,793
I got to help you.
Nurse Bonney said so.
270
00:13:02,876 --> 00:13:05,338
- Now, just stay there.
- Ah!
271
00:13:05,504 --> 00:13:06,966
[Saunders groaning]
272
00:13:07,049 --> 00:13:08,158
Alright.
273
00:13:08,241 --> 00:13:10,341
- Now, get in.
- Ah!
274
00:13:12,313 --> 00:13:14,857
No! I said,
get in the wheelchair.
275
00:13:16,622 --> 00:13:19,081
[Saunders groaning]
276
00:13:23,195 --> 00:13:25,175
Did this come with instructions?
277
00:13:25,397 --> 00:13:27,333
How do I know?
278
00:13:29,048 --> 00:13:32,414
Hey, I did it. Alright.
279
00:13:32,414 --> 00:13:34,002
[Saunders moaning]
280
00:13:37,922 --> 00:13:40,022
You forgot to get in.
281
00:13:40,446 --> 00:13:41,944
[yelling] Who are you?
282
00:13:42,027 --> 00:13:43,572
[sobbing]
283
00:13:47,035 --> 00:13:49,557
Hey, Mr. Woodman, we've been
lookin' all over for you.
284
00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:51,283
Oh, man, I'm so happy we found
you. Where you been?
285
00:13:51,303 --> 00:13:53,672
We couldn't find you
for the longest...
286
00:13:55,770 --> 00:13:59,664
Oh, excuse me, um, I didn't know
that, uh... you had company.
287
00:14:01,465 --> 00:14:03,448
[man over PA] Dr. Morgan, report to surgery.
288
00:14:03,531 --> 00:14:04,991
Dr. Morgan.
289
00:14:07,976 --> 00:14:09,640
Dr. Burger,
report to the emergency ward.
290
00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:11,183
[mumbling] Dr.--
291
00:14:12,011 --> 00:14:14,731
[Arnold over PA] Mr. Woodman.
292
00:14:18,605 --> 00:14:22,370
Come out, come out,
wherever you are.
293
00:14:24,578 --> 00:14:27,748
Alright, here we go.
Off to X-ray we go.
294
00:14:28,110 --> 00:14:29,611
[screams]
295
00:14:33,743 --> 00:14:35,375
[screams]
296
00:14:38,834 --> 00:14:40,936
How'd they get you in here?
297
00:14:41,039 --> 00:14:43,340
I was unconscious
when they brought me in.
298
00:14:43,423 --> 00:14:46,366
Yeah, but that don't
make you smaller.
299
00:14:46,449 --> 00:14:49,619
Alright, we're gonna have to do
a little measuring here.
300
00:14:54,906 --> 00:14:57,542
Impossible. We'll have
to do in two trips.
301
00:15:01,698 --> 00:15:03,329
[video game beeping]
302
00:15:06,210 --> 00:15:07,389
Excuse me, gentlemen,
I'm-I'm looking
303
00:15:07,472 --> 00:15:09,132
for one of your patients.
304
00:15:09,215 --> 00:15:11,200
Rather short guy with gray hair.
305
00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:12,657
[video game beeping]
306
00:15:14,102 --> 00:15:16,204
One of your patients is lost.
307
00:15:17,829 --> 00:15:20,157
You sewed his feet on backwards.
308
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:24,773
And we got to find him
before he tries to sit down.
309
00:15:24,856 --> 00:15:26,639
[video game beeping]
310
00:15:26,722 --> 00:15:29,042
Ah, forget it.
311
00:15:29,907 --> 00:15:33,491
Dave Sporting Goods having
a real big sale on golf balls.
312
00:15:39,611 --> 00:15:43,953
Oh, Mr. Saunders, I didn't know
you could dance so good.
313
00:15:45,792 --> 00:15:47,252
Alright.
314
00:15:47,580 --> 00:15:50,722
Alright, now, we're really on
our way, aren't we?
315
00:15:50,722 --> 00:15:52,397
[clanking]
316
00:15:56,150 --> 00:15:57,589
It doesn't look
like my old nose at all.
317
00:15:57,672 --> 00:15:59,474
As a matter of fact,
this one's straight.
318
00:15:59,494 --> 00:16:01,152
And that big lump I had...
319
00:16:01,235 --> 00:16:02,435
Well, you'll see
when I get home.
320
00:16:02,518 --> 00:16:03,718
I'll be home
in about 30 minutes.
321
00:16:03,759 --> 00:16:07,082
I'm gonna get dressed right now.
Bye-bye.
322
00:16:08,565 --> 00:16:10,240
[screams]
323
00:16:13,006 --> 00:16:16,150
Hi. Did you see a little guy
with gray hair?
324
00:16:16,233 --> 00:16:18,496
[crying]
325
00:16:18,579 --> 00:16:20,751
Oh. Hey, hey.
326
00:16:20,834 --> 00:16:22,534
You don't have to cry about it.
327
00:16:22,617 --> 00:16:24,097
It's not your problem.
328
00:16:24,180 --> 00:16:25,437
Come on, cheer up.
329
00:16:25,437 --> 00:16:27,396
[crying]
330
00:16:33,697 --> 00:16:36,082
- Vinnie.
- Hi, Vinnie.
331
00:16:36,165 --> 00:16:39,706
Hey, the Kotters, they came
to visit me. How nice.
332
00:16:39,789 --> 00:16:42,496
And flowers. You brought me
flowers. Thank you.
333
00:16:42,579 --> 00:16:44,189
No, no, no, Vinnie,
we had some chocolate for you
334
00:16:44,243 --> 00:16:46,624
but we ate it
on our way over here.
335
00:16:46,707 --> 00:16:48,030
The flowers are for Mr. Woodman.
336
00:16:48,113 --> 00:16:49,506
We'd like to see him, okay?
337
00:16:49,557 --> 00:16:51,855
Boy, so would I.
338
00:16:51,938 --> 00:16:54,596
So, uh, where's
the old bunion ward?
339
00:16:54,679 --> 00:16:56,160
Well, you don't wanna look at
the bunion ward.
340
00:16:56,243 --> 00:16:57,721
Why-why don't I just
give you the tour
341
00:16:57,804 --> 00:16:59,197
of the hospital instead, okay?
342
00:16:59,246 --> 00:17:00,807
It's a great hospital, you know.
343
00:17:00,807 --> 00:17:02,326
Oh, Mrs. Kotter,
you know they got babies
344
00:17:02,409 --> 00:17:04,388
and I know you like babies.
345
00:17:04,471 --> 00:17:06,840
Maybe you'd like
to pick one out.
346
00:17:07,695 --> 00:17:09,413
Two's enough. Thanks, Vinnie.
347
00:17:09,496 --> 00:17:12,278
Yeah, besides,
we'd rather make our own.
348
00:17:12,776 --> 00:17:14,418
Honey, why don't you go over
to the nurse's desk?
349
00:17:14,502 --> 00:17:16,153
I'm sure we need
passes or something.
350
00:17:16,184 --> 00:17:18,983
- Right.
- No. Don't-don't go to her.
351
00:17:19,066 --> 00:17:21,437
No. She's old penicillin push.
352
00:17:23,116 --> 00:17:27,087
You know what? They use her face
to scare germs out of people.
353
00:17:27,426 --> 00:17:28,943
Yo, Vinnie, Vinnie. Vinnie.
354
00:17:29,026 --> 00:17:30,189
What are you doing here?
355
00:17:30,273 --> 00:17:32,354
Oh, wow, man, I was trying to...
356
00:17:32,354 --> 00:17:34,715
Oh, wow,
Mr. Kott-air and Mrs. Kott-air.
357
00:17:34,798 --> 00:17:36,157
Freddie, how're you doing?
358
00:17:36,241 --> 00:17:38,385
Oh, wow,
that's really nice of you guys.
359
00:17:38,385 --> 00:17:40,847
I mean, to get me flowers.
You're so thoughtful.
360
00:17:40,930 --> 00:17:41,730
Uh, relax, Freddie.
361
00:17:41,731 --> 00:17:44,299
We've already done
the flower routine.
362
00:17:44,355 --> 00:17:46,937
If you guys will excuse us,
we're here to see Mr. Woodman.
363
00:17:47,020 --> 00:17:50,165
Hey, Mr. Kott-air,
you'll sure you wanna do that?
364
00:17:50,185 --> 00:17:52,868
I mean, you got
young children at home and all.
365
00:17:52,951 --> 00:17:55,606
Young children? What are you
talking about, Freddie?
366
00:17:55,689 --> 00:17:57,051
I'm talking epidemics.
367
00:17:57,071 --> 00:17:59,248
I'm talking contagiousnesses.
368
00:17:59,331 --> 00:18:01,634
I'm talking disease.
I'm talking--
369
00:18:01,717 --> 00:18:03,799
Wait a minute!
370
00:18:03,819 --> 00:18:05,922
Mr. Woodman came here
to have a bunion removed.
371
00:18:05,942 --> 00:18:06,742
I know.
372
00:18:06,742 --> 00:18:08,204
And one time
in a medical profession
373
00:18:08,205 --> 00:18:11,707
they didn't believe that
a bunion epidemic was possible.
374
00:18:13,351 --> 00:18:15,330
Alright. That's it.
375
00:18:15,414 --> 00:18:16,816
Uh, something smells around here
376
00:18:16,816 --> 00:18:18,754
and it's not the disinfectant.
377
00:18:18,754 --> 00:18:20,153
I get the distinct impression
378
00:18:20,236 --> 00:18:22,178
you guys are trying
to get rid of us.
379
00:18:22,198 --> 00:18:24,361
So do I. You know,
I wouldn't be at all surprised
380
00:18:24,361 --> 00:18:25,803
to see Juan Epstein running here
381
00:18:25,803 --> 00:18:28,517
with some sort of half-baked
story about how--
382
00:18:28,518 --> 00:18:29,318
Hey, guys.
383
00:18:29,347 --> 00:18:33,609
I know it's gonna sound
like a half-baked story, but...
384
00:18:34,209 --> 00:18:35,952
Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Kotter,
nice to see you.
385
00:18:36,035 --> 00:18:37,019
Nice to see you.
386
00:18:37,096 --> 00:18:40,117
Vinnie, you know that old bag
of bones we was talking about?
387
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:42,657
Well, it ain't in cold storage.
388
00:18:44,161 --> 00:18:46,804
Oh. Mr. and Mrs. Kotter,
lovely to see you.
389
00:18:46,888 --> 00:18:49,348
Yeah, Beau, um, ahem,
did you find
390
00:18:49,431 --> 00:18:51,531
what you were supposed
to be looking for?
391
00:18:51,614 --> 00:18:53,550
I certainly did.
392
00:18:54,439 --> 00:18:57,342
But I didn't find
what Vinnie was looking for.
393
00:18:57,763 --> 00:18:59,102
Alright. Enough.
394
00:18:59,186 --> 00:19:00,785
- I want--
- Vinnie!
395
00:19:00,869 --> 00:19:04,374
Vinnie, I couldn't find
Mr. Woodman anywhere.
396
00:19:05,296 --> 00:19:08,365
But I found out
where babies come from.
397
00:19:09,604 --> 00:19:13,547
You couldn't find Mr. Woodman?
398
00:19:14,530 --> 00:19:15,854
I want you to start talking
399
00:19:15,854 --> 00:19:17,896
and I want to hear
some answers, okay?
400
00:19:17,979 --> 00:19:19,340
Alright, alright. Look.
401
00:19:19,423 --> 00:19:21,506
I was wheeling Mr. Woodman
back from surgery
402
00:19:21,589 --> 00:19:23,811
and I turned around,
he disappeared.
403
00:19:24,985 --> 00:19:26,879
[sobbing]
404
00:19:28,858 --> 00:19:32,037
Poor Mr. Woodman.
405
00:19:32,120 --> 00:19:35,199
A brave and courageous
principal.
406
00:19:35,282 --> 00:19:38,937
That man... that man was a credit
407
00:19:38,967 --> 00:19:41,407
to corporal punishment.
408
00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:44,433
Censorship.
409
00:19:44,832 --> 00:19:47,373
Ring around a collar.
410
00:19:47,690 --> 00:19:49,071
Will you cool it, Arnold?
411
00:19:49,155 --> 00:19:50,634
Go ahead, Vinnie,
finish the story.
412
00:19:50,717 --> 00:19:52,110
Well, this is the finish
of the story.
413
00:19:52,118 --> 00:19:53,679
I got his chart,
and I don't got his body.
414
00:19:53,679 --> 00:19:56,508
And I'm afraid anyone who finds
him ain't gonna know who he is.
415
00:19:56,582 --> 00:19:59,044
You mean, that chart's the only
thing left of Michael Woodman?
416
00:19:59,044 --> 00:20:01,507
- Yeah.
- Hey, let me see that.
417
00:20:02,489 --> 00:20:04,068
Well, it certainly looks right.
418
00:20:04,151 --> 00:20:06,523
It's short and it's square.
419
00:20:07,275 --> 00:20:09,567
Don't have much
of a personality.
420
00:20:09,650 --> 00:20:11,477
Sure, sure,
look we just, uh, dress it up
421
00:20:11,561 --> 00:20:13,736
in one of his three-piece
polyester suits
422
00:20:13,783 --> 00:20:14,802
prop it up behind his desk
423
00:20:14,885 --> 00:20:16,734
nobody's gonna be the wiser.
424
00:20:18,186 --> 00:20:19,708
Now, come on!
425
00:20:19,792 --> 00:20:22,080
Vinnie, you know
what you got to do.
426
00:20:22,164 --> 00:20:24,514
I mean, you have lost a person.
427
00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:25,959
A human being.
428
00:20:26,015 --> 00:20:27,646
[sobbing]
429
00:20:28,482 --> 00:20:31,943
What a lovely tribute.
430
00:20:32,026 --> 00:20:35,398
I never thought of Mr. Woodman
like that before.
431
00:20:36,351 --> 00:20:38,451
A human being.
432
00:20:39,354 --> 00:20:41,336
You mean, I got
to tell the hospital.
433
00:20:41,419 --> 00:20:42,691
- Huh?
- Yes.
434
00:20:42,774 --> 00:20:44,439
You mean, I got to tell
old Nurse Bonney, huh?
435
00:20:44,522 --> 00:20:48,157
- Yes.
- I may not come back alive.
436
00:20:48,241 --> 00:20:50,103
Vinnie, you know
what you have to do.
437
00:20:50,186 --> 00:20:52,863
- Now, just go ahead and do it.
- Alright.
438
00:20:55,470 --> 00:20:57,198
- Miss Bonney.
- Not now, Barbarino.
439
00:20:57,282 --> 00:20:59,525
I'm figuring out my overtime.
440
00:21:00,664 --> 00:21:02,727
Yeah, but it's really important.
Something you got to know.
441
00:21:02,811 --> 00:21:04,090
What?
442
00:21:04,173 --> 00:21:06,273
What? What? What?
443
00:21:07,338 --> 00:21:09,883
Uh, your hat's on crooked.
444
00:21:10,723 --> 00:21:13,023
You are getting on my nerves,
Barbarino.
445
00:21:13,107 --> 00:21:14,827
Thank you.
446
00:21:17,612 --> 00:21:19,395
- Vinnie. Vinnie. Vinnie.
- No, not now, Bobby.
447
00:21:19,478 --> 00:21:21,241
- Don't got time for your type.
- Oh.
448
00:21:21,261 --> 00:21:22,461
No, but, Vinnie,
I'm in big trouble.
449
00:21:22,461 --> 00:21:24,332
You're the only one
I can turn to.
450
00:21:24,333 --> 00:21:26,227
- What's the matter?
- I got this patient.
451
00:21:26,311 --> 00:21:28,725
I found him in the basement.
452
00:21:29,377 --> 00:21:31,748
You found the patient
in the basement?
453
00:21:33,100 --> 00:21:34,342
Yeah, but I can't
find his chart.
454
00:21:34,426 --> 00:21:36,025
I don't know what to do
with him, so I've been...
455
00:21:36,026 --> 00:21:38,368
...rolling him
all around the hospital.
456
00:21:39,170 --> 00:21:41,346
So far, so far I've been
in the linen closet
457
00:21:41,358 --> 00:21:44,186
the maternity ward, the
psychiatric ward, the cafeteria.
458
00:21:44,207 --> 00:21:46,054
I'm running out of places.
459
00:21:46,054 --> 00:21:47,857
Okay, did this guy
have gray hair?
460
00:21:47,940 --> 00:21:48,964
- Dyed.
- He died?
461
00:21:48,984 --> 00:21:51,106
No, dyed gray hair.
462
00:21:53,333 --> 00:21:54,734
Yeah.
463
00:21:54,818 --> 00:21:56,717
Okay, how tall was he?
About this tall?
464
00:21:56,800 --> 00:21:58,000
I don't know,
he's always lying down.
465
00:21:58,001 --> 00:21:59,196
Okay, this tall?
466
00:21:59,279 --> 00:22:00,320
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's him.
467
00:22:00,403 --> 00:22:02,482
What am I gonna do?
He's just starting to wake up.
468
00:22:02,565 --> 00:22:05,428
If he starts to talk,
I'm gonna lose my job for sure.
469
00:22:05,448 --> 00:22:07,624
Okay, Bobby, you've done
the right thing by coming to me.
470
00:22:07,650 --> 00:22:09,252
This is what we do,
we gotta help each other.
471
00:22:09,272 --> 00:22:11,834
That's how you learn. Ask.
472
00:22:11,854 --> 00:22:13,453
Okay, now you go off and do
what you're supposed to do
473
00:22:13,536 --> 00:22:14,736
and I'll take care of this guy.
474
00:22:14,736 --> 00:22:16,257
- You just get him to me.
- Oh, thanks, Vinnie.
475
00:22:16,258 --> 00:22:17,758
I knew I could count on you.
I'll get him.
476
00:22:17,758 --> 00:22:19,299
- Okay.
- Vinnie?
477
00:22:19,682 --> 00:22:21,941
I heard what you told that guy.
It's good advice, isn't it?
478
00:22:22,023 --> 00:22:24,486
Yeah, it is good advice, huh?
479
00:22:27,474 --> 00:22:29,975
Hey, hey, where are you going?
480
00:22:30,059 --> 00:22:31,458
You can't leave me here.
481
00:22:31,542 --> 00:22:33,435
Old sick man.
482
00:22:35,729 --> 00:22:37,189
Oh, Barbarino.
483
00:22:37,735 --> 00:22:40,173
Oh, am I glad to see you.
484
00:22:40,256 --> 00:22:43,379
I was having a terrible dream.
485
00:22:43,462 --> 00:22:46,632
It was like
I was a man without a country.
486
00:22:48,630 --> 00:22:51,393
Rolling from place to place.
487
00:22:52,258 --> 00:22:55,638
And then that other orderly
just left me here.
488
00:22:55,722 --> 00:22:58,746
I... I don't think
he knows what he's doing.
489
00:22:59,042 --> 00:23:00,263
Okay, give him air.
Give him air.
490
00:23:00,347 --> 00:23:02,849
This guy just lost a bunion.
491
00:23:05,393 --> 00:23:06,193
Now, look.
492
00:23:06,214 --> 00:23:07,393
Vinnie Barbarino, your orderly
493
00:23:07,476 --> 00:23:08,454
is gonna take good care of you
494
00:23:08,537 --> 00:23:10,555
just like I promised you.
495
00:23:10,638 --> 00:23:11,761
I have a new respect
496
00:23:11,761 --> 00:23:14,217
for you, Vinnie Barbarino.
497
00:23:15,085 --> 00:23:19,720
Vinnie Barbarino
is a straight A student.
498
00:23:21,231 --> 00:23:23,654
Why did I say that?
499
00:23:23,737 --> 00:23:26,907
Just don't worry about it.
When you're right, you're right.
500
00:23:32,625 --> 00:23:34,425
Hey, look at him, he's gettin'
the old color back in his face.
501
00:23:34,508 --> 00:23:35,968
Gray.
502
00:23:37,271 --> 00:23:40,170
Hey, Mr. Woodman,
you know, it's really good to
503
00:23:40,254 --> 00:23:42,474
see you back on your feet.
504
00:23:42,722 --> 00:23:44,856
He ain't on his feet.
505
00:23:44,939 --> 00:23:48,208
I know, but with him it's hard
to tell the difference.
506
00:23:48,292 --> 00:23:50,254
Don't pay attention
to these guys.
507
00:23:50,338 --> 00:23:51,998
Hey, Mr. Woodman, did I ever
tell you about my uncle--
508
00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:54,367
Not now, not now, Kotter.
509
00:23:55,603 --> 00:23:57,747
I feel rotten enough.
My foot hurts.
510
00:23:57,830 --> 00:23:59,694
I hate my doctor.
I hate the room.
511
00:23:59,694 --> 00:24:01,998
I hate this food.
I hate this hospital.
512
00:24:02,018 --> 00:24:03,478
Barbarino!
513
00:24:03,781 --> 00:24:05,341
I want that patient
back in his room.
514
00:24:05,424 --> 00:24:07,305
And I want all these people
out of here.
515
00:24:07,388 --> 00:24:09,629
Especially
those little monsters.
516
00:24:10,754 --> 00:24:12,907
Now her I like.
517
00:24:18,615 --> 00:24:20,987
[theme song]
518
00:24:26,231 --> 00:24:28,760
♪ Welcome back ♪
519
00:24:28,843 --> 00:24:32,128
♪ Your dreams
were your ticket out ♪
520
00:24:32,673 --> 00:24:34,765
♪ Welcome back ♪
521
00:24:34,849 --> 00:24:39,813
♪ To that same old place
that you laughed about ♪
522
00:24:39,897 --> 00:24:41,599
♪ Well the names
have all changed ♪
523
00:24:41,682 --> 00:24:43,948
♪ Since you hung around ♪
524
00:24:44,032 --> 00:24:46,254
♪ But those dreams
have remained ♪
525
00:24:46,338 --> 00:24:48,475
♪ And they've turned around ♪
526
00:24:48,558 --> 00:24:50,608
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
527
00:24:50,691 --> 00:24:52,566
♪ Who'd have thought
they'd lead ya ♪
528
00:24:52,649 --> 00:24:54,611
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
529
00:24:54,695 --> 00:24:56,570
♪ Back here
where we need ya ♪
530
00:24:56,653 --> 00:24:58,745
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot
531
00:24:58,829 --> 00:25:00,835
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
532
00:25:00,918 --> 00:25:03,098
♪ Welcome back ♪
533
00:25:03,181 --> 00:25:07,233
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
534
00:25:07,316 --> 00:25:09,453
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
535
00:25:09,536 --> 00:25:11,585
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
536
00:25:11,668 --> 00:25:13,935
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
537
00:25:14,018 --> 00:25:15,981
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
538
00:25:16,064 --> 00:25:18,157
♪ Welcome back welcome back ♪
539
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,419
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
540
00:25:20,503 --> 00:25:22,378
♪ 'Cause we got him
on the spot ♪
541
00:25:22,461 --> 00:25:24,729
♪ Welcome back ♪
542
00:25:24,812 --> 00:25:29,167
♪ Welcome back welcome back
welcome back ♪
543
00:25:29,251 --> 00:25:30,599
♪ Welcome back welcome ♪♪
39468
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