Original subtitles

[calm music]

- Hey beautiful.

- Adam?

I thought that you were mad at me?

- Do I look mad?

- No.

But I thought that you didn't wanna be with me.

- Who wouldn't want to be with you Erica?

- Ethan.

- We're all here for you Erica.

[sirens blaring in distance]

- [Erica Voiceover] Have you ever woken up from a dream

and felt unsettled and embarrassed

and like that dream was trying

to tell you something you didn't wanna know,

so that you pushed the thoughts it conjured

deep down so you wouldn't have to see or think

or know that those thoughts exist at all?

[upbeat music]

♪ It's clearer inside of me

♪ Who I will always be

♪ Open me up to my heart

♪ Feels like I'm seeing in the dark

♪ Waking me up to my life

♪ To do it all over

♪ Again and again until the end

♪ The sum of my dreams

♪ And everything I ever wanted to be.

[upbeat music]

- [Man On Street] Hey sexy.

- [Rachel] She's here.

- Okay guys just act normally.

- Morning.

- Wow, Erica that is some dress.

- Oh, thank you.

Brent what is that, why is it vibrating?

- Trust me nothing rubs away tension

faster than Brent's little helper.

- Okay we just thought you might be a little blue today.

But I mean you look kinda great.

- You know what I am, I am great.

- Does this mean you and Adam patched things up?

- [Julianne] Rachel.

- No, you know what you guys?

I appreciate all of this, but the way I see it

I don't wanna be with someone if they don't

wanna be with me so onward, right?

- Right, and maybe it's for the best.

- Maybe.

- My last breakup I mourned for a day

and a week later I met Andre.

- [Julianne] That's your boyfriend Rachel?

Oh he's cute.

- So don't despair, your next love

may be waiting just around the corner.

- Oh you guys you know what?

While I appreciate the pep talks

and the TLC and the cupcakes I'm fine.

Really.

- Denial's not just a river in Egypt.

Give it a try.

[personal massager buzzing]

- All you've had to eat for the past 24 hours

is Melba toast, you're wasting away here.

- I have had dreams David of the four of us

vacationing together raising our children together.

How are Samuel and Nonni gonna fall in love now?

- Who?

- Samuel their Irish Jewish son

and Nonni the beautiful daughter

that we adopted from Tanzania.

- Okay enough.

Erica and Adam broke up, it happens all the time.

- Erica and Adam broke up?

Oh, I can't talk about it.

- All weekend this is what I've had to put up with.

It's like Adam dumped him.

- Wait, Adam did the dumping?

- Yeah.

- [Ivan] David, I need you.

- Okay see if you can decipher this one.

SAMAGAL because my PAW and IBN yo.

- Okay, stop annoying me and get a life

because my parents are watching and I'm buck naked yo.

- You know what I think that I'm

gonna go out and grab lunch today.

- Oh yeah you take as long as you need chicken.

- BRB.

- You know can we? - We should--

I mean it's just I, go ahead go ahead just.

- Well can we just talk about what happened the other night?

- Yeah, I haven't been able to think about anything else.

It shouldn't have happened and it will not happen again.

- Exactly, that's exactly what I was thinking too.

- I'm so sorry if I crossed any lines or anything.

- No, no no no it's fine.

I'm just glad we talked about it.

I'm glad that we cleared the air so.

- Goblins has no specials today

because Ivan's too upset or something.

So it's the usual menu.

- Great, thanks.

- Goblins' regular menu bring it on.

[meditative music]

[upbeat music]

- Ethan?

- Erica.

- Oh my God, wow.

How are you?

- Good, how are you?

- Great, good yeah, you're not at work?

- It's summertime, school's closed.

- Right, of course.

Sorry I just can't keep up the small talk it's,

it's so good to see you.

- You too.

Are you just grabbing lunch?

- Yeah, Julianne and mine our,

our publishing company is nearby.

- So it all worked out, that's great.

- Yeah.

I just feel like we're in the middle of traffic here.

- Yeah if you have to go.

- No I don't.

If you want you can join me for lunch and we can catch up?

- Yeah.

I'd love to.

- Great, good.

We've got Jay Manuel's book coming out.

It's called A Tattered Rose.

And we hired a new assistant and, Brent's working for us.

- Seriously, I thought you hated him.

- Yeah well, things change.

- Yes they do.

- So what about you?

I mean we've been talking about me.

How have you been?

- Good.

- Really?

- Yeah.

- Ethan when you've known someone as long as I've known you

you can tell when they're not telling the truth, thank you.

- You're right things aren't going that good actually.

I got uh dumped about a month ago.

- Really 'cause I just, I mean I just got dumped last week.

- Wow that's really weird that we both just--

- I know.

I'm sorry to hear that.

Was it a hard breakup?

- Terrible, she was great, she is great.

- What's her name?

- Nataline, we'd been dating for about a year.

We met not long after you and I, anyway.

You look like you're handling it

better than I am and it just happened.

Well I must be a great actress then because.

You know what, let's go dancing.

- What?

- Yeah tonight.

I don't know about you but I don't

wanna sit around feeling miserable.

I would rather go out and do shooters

and dance my ass off until the sun comes up.

- Erica I don't know, I mean it's--

- I get it.

We haven't talked in almost two years and,

you probably spent a lot of that time hating my guts.

- I never hated you.

In fact I've been thinking of calling you.

I've actually, missed you.

- I missed you too Ethan.

- Okay, dancing it is.

- Yeow.

[hard dance music]

Come on let's get a drink.

Thank you.

All right.

To being dumped.

- To being dumped.

- So what happened there?

- The short version?

We wanted different things.

- And what did she want?

- To move to Ethiopia.

- Really, why?

- Nat works for Oxfam as a program coordinator.

Three months ago she got this

opportunity to move to Ethiopia.

She wanted me to take a year off, quit my job,

give up my apartment, eat into my savings.

She said that this was an opportunity of a lifetime.

I told her she was being impulsive.

And it became a huge fight about

how I was trying to hold her back

and Ethiopia became the deal breaker.

- Wow.

- Yeah so, she's leaving next week and,

you know thinking about it just, let's have another shot.

Thank you.

To regrets.

- Regrets.

That, that was crazy.

- Which part?

- I could see what he was talking about,

Ethan when he was telling the story it was just like a,

it was like a movie playing inside my head

and he even used the word regret.

Wow, I feel like a doctor.

I can't wait to dig into this.

- All right Doctor Erica then please the floor is yours.

- Okay so here's my theory.

Ethan he, well he keeps going for the wrong women.

First there was Claire, then me, and then Nataline,

women who are risk takers who are extroverts.

Women who do not want what Ethan wants.

- What does Ethan want?

- Well Ethan he wants a stable predictable quiet life

and he needs a woman who wants those same things.

- So you're a doctor slash matchmaker then?

- Well if he keeps getting drawn to the same women

then maybe he needs a matchmaker just to [grunts]

you know steer him in the right direction.

Okay, there was one girl

that I always wanted to set him up with.

Her name was Shauna Reycraft and she was

in my masters program, and the first time

I met her I thought this is a female version of Ethan.

They were so similar, they had the same style

and the same interests the same views.

I mean it was everything.

She would have been perfect for him.

- Would she?

Well then let's find out shall we?

- You drive me crazy.

Ooh, wait wait wait, Anis we can't--

- [Emmett] Anis, my name is Emmett.

- I mean Emmett we can't do this.

- Oh, oh I get it, I get it, your garden is in bloom?

- Oh my God no that's not what this is about.

- I mean it's cool.

It's a beautiful natural glorious process.

And honestly moon blood turns me on.

- No I didn't mean to freak you out it's just that--

- Say no more.

Goddess your body is your temple

and if the gates of the temple are closed?

I completely understand.

- Oh thank you.

- I'll go rustle us up some breakfast.

But first I'm gonna go practice the ancient art of onanism.

There's no love like self love.

How does an egg white scramble sound?

- Wait why don't you skip the onanism

and we'll just go straight to breakfast.

- Oh your temple may be closed for business

but my libido is never on holiday.

[phone ringing]

- Erica's house of onanism.

- Erica, what?

- Just a bad joke.

Hey Ethan what's up?

- Can you meet up?

[Emmett groaning]

- Yeah sure, what's going on?

- Claire mailed me a,

well you kind of need to see it for yourself.

- Okay I'll be right over.

- Usual spot.

- Okay.

[Emmett moaning] [dishes clattering]

Okay so wait what does boeuf mean, beef?

- [Ethan] Yes but in this case it's French for boring.

- So wait she drew this and then mailed it to you?

- This picture's Claire's way of telling me that we're over,

that she doesn't wanna try and work things out.

Here let's sit down.

- You need to forget about Claire.

I mean this is just, it's mean.

And kinda weird.

- I don't know.

Maybe I need to go to Montreal

and try to talk things out in person.

- No Ethan you need to take a break from Claire.

- What?

- You know maybe it's time to meet someone new.

You know someone more like you.

Someone that you have stuff in common with.

Maybe it'll even happen today?

- What is that look on your face?

- What look, there's no look.

Okay come to my house tonight and we'll hang.

We'll listen to Savage Garden and, Busta Rhymes.

Maybe I'll invite a friend.

- This is a setup.

- This hey, this is an opportunity okay?

So bring an open mind.

- Okay.

- Doctor's orders.

- All right I'll be there, don't.

- Don't.

- It's a hard enough day.

- Oh poor you.

It'll be fun.

I'm glad you could make it, welcome.

- Wow Erica I love your apartment.

Yellow is a bold choice but it really works in here.

- Thank you.

[knocking on door] Shaun oh.

- Hey. - Hey.

You made it, she's here.

- [Emmett] Peace brother.

- Ethan this is my good friend Shauna.

Shauna this is the amazing Ethan.

- [Shauna] Nice to finally meet you.

- You too.

- So what kind of debauchery are we gonna get into tonight?

There's the Take Back the Night March.

- How about a game of Pictionary.

It uses both the left and right sides of your brain.

How many games can you say do that huh?

- Oh great, we can play a game, why not?

I'll get us some drinks, beers okay?

- I'm easy.

- Goddess, tell me why are we skipping

Take Back the Night March for Pictionary?

- Because we're helping Ethan.

- Well I'm in teacher's college.

- Look they're perfect for each other, right?

- Perfectly boring.

Ooh, hey I like a challenge.

You know I pride myself on being able

to have fun whenever wherever.

Hey friends, riddle me this.

Where's the coolest place to play Pictionary?

Answer, the rooftop.

- Ooh yes.

- Oh wow does this apartment come with a rooftop patio too?

- Well I mean not exactly.

But it's a big enough so it's safe.

Here you go.

- Yeah I uh, I don't know.

Do you know how many roofers die of falls every year?

And being on the roof is their job.

- Can I get you something to eat?

- I got something.

- Snacks or, amazing.

Actually is there, are there nuts in there?

- Nuts, amongst other things.

But don't worry Goddess 'cause it's all natural.

So is dying from anaphylactic shock so I'm gonna pass.

But maybe our guests would like some?

I don't know that'd be a good idea because

these brownies my friends will blow your mind.

- [Erica] I say we have two teams.

Emmett and I will take you two on.

- Done.

- Okay. - Yeah?

- These are awesome.

- Ready set do it.

It's, it's a, it's a carrot.

It's not a carrot 'cause it has legs.

It's a, a bee, is it a bee?

- Oh my gosh.

Are you drawing what I think you're drawing?

Gimme the card.

How exactly is that a visual depiction of a front yard?

- That's his front and it's about a yard long.

- That is so inappropriate.

- Are you okay?

- It's okay.

- You okay honey?

- I just feel a little peckish.

I think I'm gonna have another brownie

before the pizza arrives, Ethan?

- No thanks.

- Look she's, she's great right?

- Yeah, sure, I guess.

You know it's really stuffy in here.

Can I open a window?

- Sure.

- [Ethan] I really need to get some air.

[knocking on door]

- Pizza's here, pizza pizza pizza.

- Okay, Okay tiger.

- Did someone say triple cheese and mushroom?

- Thank you, please call again.

- This isn't working.

Shauna and Ethan they have zero chemistry.

I mean Ethan he is not into her at all.

- No, really?

Shocker.

- Excuse me?

- Erica did you actually think that setting up

Ethan with his twin was going to work?

That's a little naive don't you think?

- Okay well thank you for telling me now.

- Nothing that is worth knowing can be taught, Oscar Wilde.

- Okay so I'm an idiot and I'm

the worst doctor in training ever

and we should just cut our losses

while we're ahead and just end the session.

- Yeah I would but then you'd miss all the excitement.

- What excitement?

Hey, what?

- It's like I can taste each and every spice.

I've never eaten pizza like this before.

I have never eaten pizza like this before.

- Emmett, what is all this?

- This, this is your friends getting

in touch with their inner selves Goddess.

- There it is again, the surge.

I can feel it, surging.

Do you see what I mean?

Oh wow.

- Emmett what did you put in the brownies besides nuts?

- You wanted your friends to have fun.

They needed to loosen up a little.

- Yeah and...

- Magic mushrooms.

- Emmett.

Wait a minute where's, where, where is Ethan?

- [Emmett] Goddess.

- Ethan?

Ethan.

- Claire thinks I'm boring.

Guess what, screw her.

I'm king of the world [shouts]

- Ethan.

Ethan, Ethan you need to come down from there okay, okay?

- Erica look at the city.

The CN Tower it's like a rocket ship.

- Emmett.

- And look wait, there's another one right there.

Okay okay, whoa, whoa whoa whoa, Ethan, you guys?

You need to come down now okay?

Look we can look at the sky from down here.

- You think I'm boring?

'Cause maybe I am, Maybe Claire's right.

- No Ethan no you're not.

- I wanna be like you guys.

- You're a warrior.

[both shouting]

- Come here hey.

[groaning in pain]

Are you okay?

- Good, good, everything's fine.

[groaning in pain]

- Oh my God I have to get down from here, I have to go.

- Okay Emmett go and deal with her.

Go and deal with her.

- You, you think I'm like Shauna,

boring and conservative and pathetic.

That's why you tried to set me up with her isn't it?

- Hey Ethan you don't have to think about that right now.

You're just a little bit high.

Do you wanna go downstairs?

- How long do you think this is gonna last?

- Oh just a little bit longer.

- [Emmett] Wow, was that real or am I still high?

- No real, I saw it too, beautiful.

- We've been up here for hours, you must be exhausted.

- Oh I'm, I'm fine don't worry about me.

- Sorry again about earlier.

- Oh please Ethan.

You were high you weren't really thinking straight.

I don't know I don't think it

was 100% the mushrooms talking.

- No?

- I know you're not a big fan of Claire

but you two actually have a lot in common.

You don't worry you don't over think things, you just--

- Go for it.

- Yeah.

You know sometimes I wish I could just go for it.

But it's not really me.

Shauna was really nice and hot but she's not my type.

Thanks for trying though.

- Ethan?

Who is your type?

- Claire, she's crazy and out there

and she just says whatever she thinks all the time.

I guess I like that.

- You need that.

- Yeah, kinda do, even though she drives me nuts sometimes.

She also brings me outta my shell.

- Well you were certainly out of your shell tonight.

[Erica pretends to shout]

Oh it terrified me.

- Well I guess we'd better head down.

I think I'm almost back to normal.

All things considered tonight was a lot of fun.

So thank you.

- You're, welcome?

Okay let's go.

- Erica, do you want anymore shooters or not?

- No I'm okay, I'm okay thanks.

- Are you sure?

- Yeah.

- All right.

- Let's dance.

- Okay.

- Okay so we start with the foreword

by someone funny pop culty.

- Followed by an intro page something

with a great font design and covered with abreeves.

- Can I offer anyone a latte?

- Oh Rachel what are you still doing here?

- I don't leave 'til my boss leaves.

Well it's late and we don't pay you enough to work overtime.

So go home get some shut eye.

- Alrighty then, don't work too hard.

- Back to the intro page.

- You okay?

- Yes yes I'm just, I'm just tired.

I used to be able to pull all nighters no problemo.

But these days it's a little tougher.

Getting old is no fun.

- You're not getting old Jules.

- Oh yeah?

Well tell that to the crow's feet and bags under my eyes.

- what are you talking about?

You don't have crow's feet and the only bag

I see is that to-die-for tote.

- Well you're very nice but

you're just not looking hard enough.

- I'm looking plenty hard.

You are so beautiful.

[calm music]

[dance music]

- So you having fun?

- Yes I am so glad that we did this.

- Me too.

[dance music]

- Is that?

- Whoa whoa whoa whoa what was that?

- Sorry, nothing.

I thought I saw someone that looked

a lot like Nat from the side but it wasn't her.

- You really miss her huh?

You want her back?

- 'Course I want her back.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

- What are you doing?

- Okay so you call her you go to her and you fix it.

- No Erica I can't do that.

- Why not Ethan I mean what do you have to lose?

The worst she can say is no,

and you're no worse off than you are now.

- You know what?

I think we should go.

It's late and I'm tired.

- What, two seconds ago you said

you were having a great time.

- Yeah still I'm gonna go all right?

- Ethan? - Sorry.

- Wait wait wait hey, why do you do that?

- Do what?

- You just change the subject, you avoid the problem,

you ignore what it is that you really want.

It doesn't get you anywhere.

I mean obviously you are in love with this woman

so why are you letting the relationship die over a trip?

- Why are you attacking me?

- Why are you saying one thing

when clearly you want something else?

- You know what I'm going, goodbye Erica.

- No Ethan you know why you can't make a relationship work?

Because you going after women like Claire, Nataline, me

over and over again and you set yourself up

to be pulled and prodded outside

of your little safety bubble.

And as soon as that starts to happen

as soon as we start to do the thing

that drew you to us in the first place you, you punish us.

Like you did to Nataline

and like you're doing to me right now.

- Because you're an expert at making relationships work.

Right.

[dance music]

[meditative music]

[knocking on door]

[meditative music]

[knocking on door]

[meditative music]

- Hey.

- Hey.

- Can I come in?

I've been walking around for hours

thinking about how familiar this all feels.

- It's a problem.

- You were right I pushed Nataline away

because I wouldn't let her, be her.

- Look why do you do that?

- Why did I do it with you?

I mean, everything seemed fine

until you wanted to take a huge risk

and open up your own company and I held you back.

- But why I mean Ethan what is it that happens to you?

- I guess I get scared.

I think of the obstacles the practicalities.

I always find a reason to say no.

I guess that's me, that's just who I am.

- No it's not, it's not really you Ethan.

I mean deep down inside there is this guy

who wants to be brave who wants to you know

go out and do crazy things and just go for it.

And then there's this other part of you, the scared part,

that is always screwing everything up.

- So what do I do?

Tell that part of myself to, shut up?

- Basically.

Yeah.

And just recognize it for what it is

and think about what it is that you have to lose,

an apartment, a job, or the woman that you're in love with.

[meditative music]

Go for it.

- Ethan.

What are you doing here?

- I had to see you.

I made a huge mistake.

And I know I got scared,

but in my heart I know that I belong with you.

- [Erica] Wow.

[meditative music]

[calm music]

- Morning.

- Morning.

Okay we're alone.

You don't have to act like last night didn't happen.

- I am so sorry Jules.

That was a mistake of epic proportions.

- Okay would you stop doing that?

No seriously, would you stop saying oh no we can't.

You know we shouldn't.

I mean do you wanna be with me or not?

- Julianne,

I've wanted you since the first day I met you.

- Oh my God.

Oh my, well you never said anything.

- What was I supposed to say?

How would I have said it?

You were my boss my, my bestie.

It was torture.

- Brent I had no idea.

- It's not like I've exactly been putting it out there.

If anything the past couple of years I've been

giving off more of a hate than a love vibe.

- Well that's why you went after me so insanely,

because I hurt you.

- Because you hurt me but,

not that it's an excuse because it's not.

- No no that's not why I'm bringing it up.

It's just, I mean it explains a lot of things.

Now it's my turn.

I have loved you too as a friend for years.

It's only recently that it's become more than that.

A lot more.

- Good morning 50/50.

Okay, you don't have to be psychic

to see what's going on between the two of you.

- Overactive imagination much?

- Fact.

Erica's not always gonna be as distracted

as she's been the last couple of days

so if you want to keep your affair covert

you might wanna consider getting a room.

[upbeat music]

- Ivan good morning, 50/50 rent check.

- Oh my brave little sparrow

who's dressed more like a bird of paradise, va voom.

- Oh thank you.

What?

- Adam dropped by this morning

and he asked me to give this to you.

- He brought this to you?

- I just, I wanted to smack him so bad but I

opted for the freezing cold shoulder instead.

You know what, forget about Adam.

What can I do for you?

A latte, one of my patented heart mending elixirs?

You name it it's on the house.

- Chocolate croissant?

- Chocolate.

- Thanks you guys you're great but I'm fine.

- Hang in there.

Time heals.

- Kai hey.

- Hey, how are you?

- I'm, I'm great you?

- I'm all right.

- Erica I just want to tell you I think that Adam's an idiot

for letting you go, seriously.

[meditative music]

Anyway I know it's none of my business.

[meditative music]

- [Erica] Hi.

- Hello Erica.

- So Ethan is doing good, he's going to Ethiopia.

- Yup, you handled that very well in the end.

- Well I mean it took me a while.

I'm such an idiot.

I mean trying to set him up back in the past.

I mean what was I thinking?

- That's how it goes.

Sometimes you need the journey in order to see

what was right in front of you the whole time.

Ethan was being inauthentic right?

That was the point.

You figured that out in the end

and well that's all that matters.

- Well it was really hard to figure out.

Ethan he hides who he really is

who he really wants to be so well.

- Well we all do that Erica.

That's a way that we protect ourselves right?

You know we push down what we truly want

and the more threatened that we feel

the more that that comes out.

Which, well which brings us to you.

- Me?

- Let's talk about you Erica.

About what you've been doing since your break up with Adam.

- Really, what I've been doing?

- Well, well the clothes that

you've been wearing for instance.

- Oh well, you know I felt like dressing up.

- [Dr. Tom] Why?

- To feel good.

- [Dr. Tom] To feel good in what way?

- I don't know you know you're feeling blue

you put on a pretty dress.

It's really not more complicated than that.

- And has putting on a pretty dress

and dancing at the club and being looked at

and being wanted by men has that made you feel better?

- I don't know what you're talking about.

- There's a contract that exists

between men and women Erica that

we don't talk about certain things.

But of course that doesn't mean that they aren't happening.

If a man desires you what does that do for you?

I mean how does that make things better?

Adam rejected you and you're not dealing with that.

Instead you're, well you're doing this.

And I just think that it's important

to understand why that is.

Don't you?

- You know what?

I really don't need this right now, seriously.

- Erica.

- Okay so Adam doesn't wanna be with me.

It's a fact and yes it's really painful.

But I don't think that I need to dig around

and find out why it upsets me.

I think that that is pretty obvious.

- Okay, so what are you gonna do about it?

- Well, I'm gonna find someone that does wanna be with me.

In fact I don't have to look that hard

because he's right out there.

So if you're looking for something that I've

been hiding or denying maybe it's that I want Kai.

Maybe I was meant to be with him this whole time.

- Erica I'm sorry we're not done here yet.

- Oh yes we are.

Ivan hey, where's Kai?

- Kai, oh he just left.

- How long ago?

- Only a minute ago you can probably still catch him.

- [Erica Voiceover] For all of us there is

a tension between who we think we are

and what we really feel and want and need.

Sometimes it's hard to tell the truth from the lie.

- Kai?

Kai.

- Erica.

What is it, are you okay?

[upbeat music]