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1
00:00:11,300 --> 00:00:13,675
OK, guys, Juliet's gonna
be here any minute.
2
00:00:13,710 --> 00:00:15,644
How do I look?
3
00:00:18,523 --> 00:00:21,464
You think the boutonniere's over the top?
Is a little bit, huh?
4
00:00:21,499 --> 00:00:23,930
What about my candelabrum?
5
00:00:23,965 --> 00:00:27,067
It would be fine, if you had
a hunchback and a bell tower.
6
00:00:28,965 --> 00:00:31,727
Justin, relax. It's gonna be fine.
7
00:00:31,762 --> 00:00:33,127
Well, it's just this
is the first meal
8
00:00:33,493 --> 00:00:34,893
Juliet's having with our family
9
00:00:35,127 --> 00:00:36,860
and, you know, I don't
want anything to go wrong.
10
00:00:36,895 --> 00:00:39,224
Oh, what could possibly go wrong?
11
00:00:39,259 --> 00:00:40,922
I think tonight might be the night
12
00:00:40,956 --> 00:00:43,711
I try to eat my dinner blindfolded.
13
00:00:43,746 --> 00:00:47,713
But then you wouldn't
know what you were eating.
14
00:00:47,748 --> 00:00:49,813
You should do it.
15
00:00:49,848 --> 00:00:53,147
Dad, give me the socks you're
wearing and some butter. Go.
16
00:00:54,947 --> 00:00:57,478
I don't need butter to eat socks.
17
00:00:58,979 --> 00:01:01,912
Good luck not being ashamed
of all that, sweetie.
18
00:01:01,946 --> 00:01:05,746
Justin's new vampire girlfriend
is coming over for dinner tonight.
19
00:01:05,780 --> 00:01:07,379
I still can't get
used to saying that.
20
00:01:07,413 --> 00:01:08,846
I can.
21
00:01:08,881 --> 00:01:10,647
Justin's got a girlfriend,
22
00:01:10,681 --> 00:01:12,114
a vampire girlfriend.
23
00:01:12,348 --> 00:01:14,315
- Justin's got a girlfriend.
- Dad!
24
00:01:15,717 --> 00:01:17,416
I'm sorry. I'm just
trying to get out
25
00:01:17,717 --> 00:01:20,516
all of my inappropriate
behavior before she gets here.
26
00:01:20,551 --> 00:01:23,617
Hey, who wants to see
my appendix scar?
27
00:01:26,352 --> 00:01:28,219
That's her.
28
00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:32,920
Dad, I'm not opening that door
until you put your shirt down.
29
00:01:33,954 --> 00:01:34,954
Good.
30
00:01:36,488 --> 00:01:38,555
OK.
31
00:01:42,057 --> 00:01:43,589
Hi, Justin.
32
00:01:43,624 --> 00:01:46,757
Hello, Juliet.
33
00:01:46,792 --> 00:01:50,059
Why, you're a vision of
loveliness and enchantment.
34
00:01:50,093 --> 00:01:53,360
Oh, you're so cute when you
give me old-timey compliments.
35
00:01:53,394 --> 00:01:56,527
Well, you're a vampire.
Vampires are really old, right?
36
00:01:56,562 --> 00:02:00,763
I mean, uh, not that
you're old or look old.
37
00:02:00,797 --> 00:02:04,564
You look great for your age.
Which would be...?
38
00:02:04,598 --> 00:02:07,398
Justin, I already told you,
I'm not telling you how old I am.
39
00:02:07,433 --> 00:02:10,900
If I did, you would freak out.
Like Caesar did. Oh, shoot!
40
00:02:12,568 --> 00:02:14,235
I'm narrowing it down.
41
00:02:14,269 --> 00:02:17,237
Nobody cares.
42
00:02:18,505 --> 00:02:20,805
Yoknow my family.
43
00:02:20,839 --> 00:02:22,705
Hi, guys.
44
00:02:22,740 --> 00:02:25,074
Wow, it smells
really great in here.
45
00:02:25,108 --> 00:02:27,008
Well, I've prepared a special meal
46
00:02:27,043 --> 00:02:30,077
in honor of our special guest.
47
00:02:30,111 --> 00:02:32,245
It's my special...
48
00:02:32,279 --> 00:02:38,014
...ten cheese enchilada surprise.
49
00:02:38,048 --> 00:02:41,549
The surprise is an eleventh cheese!
50
00:02:41,583 --> 00:02:45,919
Eleven cheeses in one dish? Um...
51
00:02:45,953 --> 00:02:47,620
I'm really sorry, Mr.
and Mrs. Russo.
52
00:02:47,654 --> 00:02:49,721
I don't think I can eat that.
53
00:02:49,755 --> 00:02:51,555
I probably should've
mentioned this earlier,
54
00:02:51,689 --> 00:02:54,524
but vampires are kind
of health conscious.
55
00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:57,792
Juliet, you're right.
56
00:02:57,827 --> 00:03:01,294
This cheesy food could
be considered unhealthy.
57
00:03:01,328 --> 00:03:04,863
And my family deserves
better than that.
58
00:03:09,266 --> 00:03:12,834
From now on, the Russos will
be eating much healthier.
59
00:03:12,868 --> 00:03:15,269
Isn't that right, Jerry?
60
00:03:15,303 --> 00:03:16,536
Get in there and
fight for our cake!
61
00:03:16,570 --> 00:03:18,404
Right.
62
00:03:20,239 --> 00:03:22,874
Sure, honey. You know
how I always support
63
00:03:22,908 --> 00:03:24,941
your unpredictable whims.
64
00:03:24,976 --> 00:03:27,376
Sorry.
65
00:03:27,410 --> 00:03:30,712
Thank you.
Now throw that cake away.
66
00:03:46,423 --> 00:03:49,157
Wow! You've only been
here for a few minutes
67
00:03:49,192 --> 00:03:51,892
and my family's already
better off for knowing you.
68
00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:52,960
You're incredible.
69
00:03:53,294 --> 00:03:55,428
- No, you are, Justin.
- No, you are.
70
00:03:55,462 --> 00:03:57,096
No, you are.
71
00:03:57,130 --> 00:03:58,697
Butterfly kiss!
72
00:04:00,899 --> 00:04:03,166
Wow. well...
73
00:04:03,200 --> 00:04:05,034
This just is great.
74
00:04:05,068 --> 00:04:06,601
I'm gonna go take out the trash.
75
00:04:13,807 --> 00:04:15,707
I'm gonna help her.
76
00:04:20,545 --> 00:04:22,679
Well you know everything's
gonna be a breeze
77
00:04:22,947 --> 00:04:24,647
That the end will no doubt
justify the means
78
00:04:25,215 --> 00:04:26,515
You can fix any problem with
the slightest of ease
79
00:04:26,550 --> 00:04:28,350
Yes please
80
00:04:28,385 --> 00:04:30,185
But you might find out it'll
go to your head
81
00:04:30,887 --> 00:04:32,187
When you write a report on a
book you never read
82
00:04:32,722 --> 00:04:34,689
With the snap of your fingers
you can make your bed
83
00:04:34,724 --> 00:04:36,224
That's what I said
84
00:04:36,326 --> 00:04:39,394
Everything is not
what it seems
85
00:04:39,429 --> 00:04:43,233
When you can get all you wanted
in your wildest dreams
86
00:04:43,267 --> 00:04:47,035
You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes
87
00:04:47,070 --> 00:04:51,037
Because everything is
not what it seems
88
00:04:51,072 --> 00:04:54,606
Everything is not
what it seems
89
00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:58,709
When you can have what you want
by the simplest of means
90
00:04:58,743 --> 00:05:02,411
Be careful not to mess with
the balance of things
91
00:05:02,446 --> 00:05:06,581
Because everything is not...
92
00:05:06,616 --> 00:05:09,851
What it seems
93
00:05:12,054 --> 00:05:14,888
Thanks to Juliet,
I have seen the error of our ways.
94
00:05:14,922 --> 00:05:16,523
We are throwing out
all of this junk food
95
00:05:16,757 --> 00:05:17,991
and we're never lookin' back.
96
00:05:18,125 --> 00:05:19,658
Wait, Mom. You can't do that.
97
00:05:19,693 --> 00:05:21,359
Of course I can, sweetie.
I'm your mom.
98
00:05:21,394 --> 00:05:23,394
I can do whatever I want.
99
00:05:24,930 --> 00:05:26,364
Well, then I'm out.
100
00:05:26,398 --> 00:05:28,099
I was this close
101
00:05:28,133 --> 00:05:30,835
to eating meals with you
guys out of convenience,
102
00:05:30,869 --> 00:05:33,037
but you, mother,
just put a stop to that.
103
00:05:33,071 --> 00:05:36,406
So thank you for
ruining our family!
104
00:05:36,441 --> 00:05:38,208
I'm just kidding.
105
00:05:39,644 --> 00:05:41,610
But seriously, I'm not
gonna eat with you guys.
106
00:05:41,645 --> 00:05:44,145
That... that's just so good.
107
00:05:46,448 --> 00:05:49,416
Hi, Juliet.
Guess what's in this bag.
108
00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:52,652
Nothing but junk food.
I could smell it from a mile away.
109
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:55,488
Vampire sense of smell.
Hey, is Justin around?
110
00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:58,190
Oh, he's upstairs.
111
00:06:00,159 --> 00:06:04,028
Look at you. Cloudy day so
you're out without an umbrella.
112
00:06:04,063 --> 00:06:05,229
Excuse me?
113
00:06:05,330 --> 00:06:07,765
I know you're a vampire.
114
00:06:07,799 --> 00:06:10,067
I'm Harper. And I just
want to let you know
115
00:06:10,101 --> 00:06:11,735
that there are no hard feelings.
116
00:06:11,769 --> 00:06:13,536
Hard feelings? About what?
117
00:06:13,571 --> 00:06:15,738
Oh, Justin didn't tell you?
118
00:06:15,772 --> 00:06:19,208
That is just like him,
trying to spare other people's feelings.
119
00:06:19,242 --> 00:06:22,711
He and I have had an on-and-off
relationship for years.
120
00:06:22,745 --> 00:06:25,413
We're off now, which is why
you guys are on. So I'm cool.
121
00:06:25,447 --> 00:06:27,848
Whoa, whoa! What's with the garlic?
122
00:06:27,882 --> 00:06:29,582
We were just having a conversation.
123
00:06:30,050 --> 00:06:34,020
Sorry. I just wasn't sure how
this whole thing was gonna go.
124
00:06:35,255 --> 00:06:36,889
So you made a garlic necklace.
125
00:06:36,923 --> 00:06:38,390
No, I actually had it.
126
00:06:38,591 --> 00:06:40,525
It's for this pasta outfit
that I'm working on.
127
00:06:40,559 --> 00:06:44,561
Oh, you're the
food-for-clothes girl.
128
00:06:44,595 --> 00:06:48,564
Yeah, Justin has talked about you.
129
00:06:49,566 --> 00:06:51,234
Yes!
130
00:06:59,643 --> 00:07:01,944
So this is our new garden,
131
00:07:01,979 --> 00:07:04,613
where we'll be growing all
sorts of exciting vegetables,
132
00:07:04,648 --> 00:07:08,283
including broccoli, which they
say has near magical qualities.
133
00:07:08,317 --> 00:07:10,651
It'll be magical if
I can get it down
134
00:07:10,686 --> 00:07:12,686
without a warm cheese sauce.
135
00:07:16,456 --> 00:07:20,292
Hmm. Magical qualities, huh?
136
00:07:20,326 --> 00:07:21,660
Did you say something, Max?
137
00:07:21,761 --> 00:07:23,361
Nope. Didn't say a word.
138
00:07:25,597 --> 00:07:29,366
Hmm. Magical qualities, huh.
139
00:07:30,534 --> 00:07:33,169
Let's just pretend we
didn't hear it that time.
140
00:07:38,008 --> 00:07:39,507
Don't let this garden go to waste.
141
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:42,110
Give all this food
a lot more taste.
142
00:07:43,812 --> 00:07:46,746
Well, that was unexpected.
143
00:07:55,155 --> 00:07:57,589
Man, that Pilates class was great.
144
00:07:57,624 --> 00:08:00,959
I've never felt more physically
or emotionally centered
145
00:08:00,993 --> 00:08:02,160
in all of my life.
146
00:08:03,495 --> 00:08:04,929
Hey Alex, would you
like to join us?
147
00:08:05,330 --> 00:08:06,463
It'd really help
strengthen your core.
148
00:08:07,198 --> 00:08:10,266
Oh, no thanks. I like my core
loose and in front of the TV.
149
00:08:22,978 --> 00:08:26,947
Uh... Dad, aren't those
shorts a little tight?
150
00:08:28,783 --> 00:08:31,484
They're looser than
I thought they'd be.
151
00:08:35,221 --> 00:08:39,056
Oh! Oh, my gosh. What is going on?
152
00:08:39,091 --> 00:08:42,024
A total aerobic workout.
That's what's going on.
153
00:08:42,059 --> 00:08:44,226
The perfect complement
to healthy eating.
154
00:08:44,261 --> 00:08:46,629
- Dad, you're OK with this?
- Yeah, of course.
155
00:08:46,663 --> 00:08:49,699
What's not to be OK with?
It's a great idea.
156
00:08:49,733 --> 00:08:51,735
Let's start stretching, Jerry.
157
00:08:51,769 --> 00:08:54,505
Another great idea.
158
00:08:55,807 --> 00:08:58,642
I just...
159
00:08:58,677 --> 00:09:00,311
Trying to...
160
00:09:01,313 --> 00:09:03,381
Oh!
161
00:09:04,483 --> 00:09:06,884
Wha...? I give up
eating with you people,
162
00:09:06,918 --> 00:09:08,552
and now you're making it impossible
163
00:09:08,753 --> 00:09:11,521
for me to watch
television in my own home?
164
00:09:11,555 --> 00:09:13,823
I'm so desperate, I'm thinking
about going to Harper's house.
165
00:09:17,126 --> 00:09:20,195
Hum de dum de dum.
166
00:09:20,230 --> 00:09:23,065
- What are you doing?
- What? Nothing.
167
00:09:24,133 --> 00:09:26,033
Why do you ask?
168
00:09:26,068 --> 00:09:28,168
Because it looks like
you're humming suspiciously
169
00:09:28,202 --> 00:09:29,501
to look casual.
170
00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:32,437
That's exactly what I was doing.
171
00:09:32,471 --> 00:09:34,839
Now, let's see what
you're really up to.
172
00:09:37,809 --> 00:09:39,677
Oh!
173
00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:44,615
Max! What did you do?
174
00:09:44,649 --> 00:09:46,650
Umm...
175
00:09:46,684 --> 00:09:49,419
Well, I just wanted to use magic
176
00:09:49,453 --> 00:09:51,054
to make the vegetables
taste better,
177
00:09:51,088 --> 00:09:54,189
but I've made a giant pumpkin.
178
00:09:55,658 --> 00:09:57,726
I'm going to live in it.
179
00:09:59,194 --> 00:10:02,463
First, I need to carve a
door in the side of it.
180
00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:07,834
Max, that's a spoon.
181
00:10:07,868 --> 00:10:09,802
I know what it's called.
182
00:10:24,115 --> 00:10:25,715
Oh.
183
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:30,353
Alex Russo and friend.
What a pleasant surprise.
184
00:10:30,387 --> 00:10:32,421
What can I get for you?
185
00:10:32,456 --> 00:10:34,990
Your daughter out of my house.
186
00:10:35,025 --> 00:10:38,026
She's made it impossible for
me to eat anything unhealthy.
187
00:10:40,195 --> 00:10:42,396
You know, with all the
time Juliet's been spending
188
00:10:42,431 --> 00:10:45,899
with your brother, we could
use an extra hand around here.
189
00:10:45,934 --> 00:10:48,001
What would you say
to a part-time job
190
00:10:48,035 --> 00:10:50,136
here at the Late Nite Bite?
191
00:10:50,170 --> 00:10:55,140
A job? Well, doesn't sound
like something I'd do,
192
00:10:55,174 --> 00:10:59,342
but it would get me out
of Family Exercise Night.
193
00:10:59,377 --> 00:11:02,845
Look at you. So clever and cunning.
194
00:11:02,879 --> 00:11:05,081
Sometimes we wish
Juliet had more of that.
195
00:11:05,115 --> 00:11:07,149
Yeah, in a lot of ways,
196
00:11:07,183 --> 00:11:10,018
you're probably more like
a vampire than she is.
197
00:11:10,052 --> 00:11:11,686
Oh, thank you.
198
00:11:13,088 --> 00:11:16,623
So it's settled. You'll both
start working here immediately.
199
00:11:16,658 --> 00:11:19,693
Me, too? Yes!
200
00:11:21,028 --> 00:11:23,830
You know, we find
Juliet's health kicks
201
00:11:23,864 --> 00:11:25,464
rather irritating, too.
202
00:11:25,566 --> 00:11:28,200
Really? I thought all vampires
were health conscious.
203
00:11:28,234 --> 00:11:31,203
No, it's mainly just
the younger generation.
204
00:11:31,237 --> 00:11:34,372
They sometimes even try to
get humans to eat better
205
00:11:34,407 --> 00:11:37,141
so they'll have
healthier blood to suck.
206
00:11:37,175 --> 00:11:39,342
They're very fanatical about it.
207
00:11:40,544 --> 00:11:41,911
What did you just say?
208
00:11:41,946 --> 00:11:44,113
I said they're fanatical about it.
209
00:11:44,148 --> 00:11:46,082
No, before that.
210
00:11:46,116 --> 00:11:48,984
I said it's mainly the
younger generation.
211
00:11:49,018 --> 00:11:51,452
Yes, but after that.
212
00:11:51,487 --> 00:11:54,955
Oh, I think she's talking about
the part where you mentioned
213
00:11:54,990 --> 00:11:57,557
how younger vampires try
to get humans healthier
214
00:11:57,592 --> 00:12:00,860
before drinking their
delicious blood.
215
00:12:00,894 --> 00:12:03,863
That's the one. OK, um...
216
00:12:03,897 --> 00:12:06,298
Well, excuse me, just...
217
00:12:09,135 --> 00:12:11,936
Oh! You've got to be kidding me.
218
00:12:11,971 --> 00:12:14,172
But her shift just started.
219
00:12:14,206 --> 00:12:16,708
I'll cover her shift.
I knew how this was gonna go.
220
00:12:16,742 --> 00:12:18,442
I just didn't think it
would happen so soon.
221
00:12:32,846 --> 00:12:34,080
Max?
222
00:12:36,416 --> 00:12:38,617
There's some mail here for ya.
223
00:12:38,651 --> 00:12:40,919
Hold on.
224
00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:54,832
This is my mail slot.
225
00:12:54,866 --> 00:12:57,434
Yeah, I get it.
226
00:12:57,469 --> 00:12:58,669
I hope you're not jealous
227
00:12:59,137 --> 00:13:00,537
that I moved out of the
house before you did.
228
00:13:02,207 --> 00:13:06,510
Tell Mommy and Daddy I said,
"Hi." Loser.
229
00:13:09,113 --> 00:13:11,148
OK. I'll tell 'em.
230
00:13:12,850 --> 00:13:16,219
Mom, Dad. The kid living
in the jack-o'-lantern
231
00:13:16,253 --> 00:13:18,388
thinks I'm the loser.
232
00:13:20,257 --> 00:13:23,393
Justin, uh,
let's talk about Juliet.
233
00:13:23,427 --> 00:13:26,195
Isn't she the greatest?
I could talk about her all day.
234
00:13:26,229 --> 00:13:28,997
Yes, she's cute, and she's
looking past your jungle toes,
235
00:13:29,032 --> 00:13:31,799
and we're all really excited
for you, but look...
236
00:13:31,834 --> 00:13:33,701
She wants to drink your blood.
237
00:13:33,735 --> 00:13:35,436
What are you talking about?
238
00:13:35,470 --> 00:13:37,704
I got a job over at
the Late Nite Bite,
239
00:13:37,739 --> 00:13:39,940
and while I was there I found
out that young vampires
240
00:13:40,208 --> 00:13:42,642
like to feed on the healthiest
human blood they can find.
241
00:13:44,678 --> 00:13:46,512
I can't believe it.
242
00:13:46,546 --> 00:13:48,280
You got a job?
243
00:13:49,515 --> 00:13:52,417
- I know, it's weird, huh?
- Totally. Up top!
244
00:13:52,451 --> 00:13:53,952
No! Stop.
245
00:13:55,220 --> 00:13:57,555
I think Juliet is trying
to get you healthy
246
00:13:57,589 --> 00:13:59,557
so she can drink your blood.
247
00:13:59,591 --> 00:14:02,159
Come on, Alex. Juliet's
a vampire with a soul,
248
00:14:02,193 --> 00:14:03,593
so she has a conscience.
249
00:14:03,995 --> 00:14:06,129
That's why she volunteers at
blood banks on the weekends.
250
00:14:06,163 --> 00:14:08,198
Keep talkin'. You're almost there.
251
00:14:08,232 --> 00:14:10,066
And I bet you think it's
weird that she salivates
252
00:14:10,501 --> 00:14:12,702
uncontrollably around me when
I wear v-neck t-shirts, too.
253
00:14:13,537 --> 00:14:14,904
On to sports.
254
00:14:18,308 --> 00:14:20,943
Oh, my gosh! My girlfriend's
gonna suck my blood.
255
00:14:22,446 --> 00:14:25,981
Well, look at that,
you stuck the landing.
256
00:14:28,251 --> 00:14:30,419
Justin.
257
00:14:30,454 --> 00:14:32,087
Juliet!
258
00:14:34,056 --> 00:14:36,925
Vampire speed. Forgot about that.
259
00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:40,094
Hey, why are you wearing a scarf?
It's like 75 degrees out.
260
00:14:40,128 --> 00:14:42,296
I'm not wearing a scarf.
261
00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:46,133
Oh, you mean this? OK,
I'm wearing a scarf.
262
00:14:46,167 --> 00:14:48,701
Why are you acting so weird?
263
00:14:48,736 --> 00:14:51,570
You probably have heat stroke.
264
00:14:51,605 --> 00:14:53,405
Let's get that scarf off.
265
00:15:00,211 --> 00:15:01,778
Hey, so, guess what?
266
00:15:01,813 --> 00:15:04,947
I woke up this evening and
my fangs had come in. Look.
267
00:15:07,083 --> 00:15:09,483
Stay back!
268
00:15:09,518 --> 00:15:12,986
Keep your filthy fangs away
from my perfect, succulent neck!
269
00:15:13,021 --> 00:15:16,155
- Justin! What are you doing?
- Trying to save my life.
270
00:15:16,189 --> 00:15:17,890
Alex told me you're
trying to get me healthy
271
00:15:18,024 --> 00:15:19,658
just so you can drink my blood.
272
00:15:19,692 --> 00:15:21,860
What? No, you're my boyfriend.
273
00:15:21,894 --> 00:15:23,494
I would never do
anything like that.
274
00:15:23,529 --> 00:15:25,096
I know, but Alex said...
275
00:15:25,297 --> 00:15:27,031
Aren't you always saying
your sister's up to no good?
276
00:15:27,065 --> 00:15:29,132
Why would you believe her?
277
00:15:29,166 --> 00:15:32,200
It's a complicated
relationship we have together.
278
00:15:35,670 --> 00:15:38,840
I'm sorry, I should've known
better than to listen to Alex.
279
00:15:38,874 --> 00:15:40,608
Just 'cause she's working
for your parents,
280
00:15:40,943 --> 00:15:43,044
she thinks she's like
some expert on vampires.
281
00:15:43,079 --> 00:15:44,479
She's working for my parents?
282
00:15:44,780 --> 00:15:46,380
Yeah, she's over there
now with Harper.
283
00:15:46,414 --> 00:15:48,648
Oh, my gosh. There's no
easy way to say this,
284
00:15:48,682 --> 00:15:50,783
so I'm just gonna come
right out with it.
285
00:15:50,817 --> 00:15:52,084
OK.
286
00:15:52,185 --> 00:15:54,053
My parents might be planning
to drink their blood.
287
00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:55,887
I love you, too. I...
288
00:15:58,558 --> 00:16:00,592
You didn't say what I
thought you were...
289
00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:02,627
Come on! Let's go
tell your parents!
290
00:16:03,362 --> 00:16:05,964
Mom, Dad...
291
00:16:05,998 --> 00:16:07,965
Juliet said she loved me.
292
00:16:09,334 --> 00:16:12,102
Well, she didn't,
but I thought she was going to.
293
00:16:12,137 --> 00:16:14,338
Justin. Blood drinking.
294
00:16:14,373 --> 00:16:16,140
And she didn't freak
out when I said it.
295
00:16:16,175 --> 00:16:18,376
- Aww.
- Thank you, Mom.
296
00:16:18,411 --> 00:16:20,379
Alex. Harper. Danger.
297
00:16:20,413 --> 00:16:23,315
This is an important milestone
in out relationship.
298
00:16:23,350 --> 00:16:25,616
My parents are about to drink
Alex and Harper's blood.
299
00:16:25,650 --> 00:16:26,783
- Oh!
- What?
300
00:16:27,084 --> 00:16:29,986
Thank you. Someone who
understands danger.
301
00:16:30,021 --> 00:16:32,021
OK, now that they know that,
302
00:16:32,056 --> 00:16:34,023
can we get back to
talking about us?
303
00:16:34,057 --> 00:16:36,324
We'll talk about it
on the way. Come on.
304
00:16:36,358 --> 00:16:38,659
Did the satellite guy come?
305
00:16:38,693 --> 00:16:42,029
I gotta tell him where
to put the dish.
306
00:16:42,063 --> 00:16:44,097
Max, we are in the middle
of something, here.
307
00:16:44,398 --> 00:16:46,599
Your sister and Harper are
about to be bitten by vampires.
308
00:16:46,633 --> 00:16:48,934
Cool! That's even better
than the satellite.
309
00:16:48,969 --> 00:16:50,769
Come on. Let's get over there.
310
00:16:50,804 --> 00:16:54,940
Oh, my gosh. What if we
only have time to save one?
311
00:16:54,974 --> 00:16:57,042
Alex is our daughter.
312
00:16:57,076 --> 00:17:00,578
But Harper has so
much more potential.
313
00:17:00,612 --> 00:17:02,446
We both know it'd be Harper
314
00:17:02,481 --> 00:17:04,248
who'd take care of
us in our old age.
315
00:17:05,717 --> 00:17:07,050
We'll talk about it on our way.
316
00:17:11,222 --> 00:17:13,123
All right...
317
00:17:13,158 --> 00:17:14,891
Since it's between rushes,
318
00:17:14,993 --> 00:17:18,762
why don't we take your
photos for your company IDs.
319
00:17:18,796 --> 00:17:21,431
But there's only two employees.
320
00:17:21,466 --> 00:17:24,067
It's a state law thing.
Just take a picture, will ya?
321
00:17:25,370 --> 00:17:28,471
I'm sorry. I'm just a tad hungry,
that's all.
322
00:17:28,506 --> 00:17:31,307
Alex, you first. Mmm?
323
00:17:32,642 --> 00:17:35,210
OK, good.
324
00:17:36,512 --> 00:17:38,346
Just tilt your head a little.
325
00:17:38,380 --> 00:17:40,080
More.
326
00:17:41,049 --> 00:17:42,783
More...
327
00:17:42,817 --> 00:17:44,518
More.
328
00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:48,020
Uh... This is a
little uncomfortable.
329
00:17:48,055 --> 00:17:50,122
But it makes for a good picture.
330
00:17:50,156 --> 00:17:54,892
Chin out. Chin out.
Really stretch it.
331
00:17:54,927 --> 00:17:56,827
Now, Cindy, why don't
you go over there
332
00:17:56,862 --> 00:17:58,495
and help her with
her head position?
333
00:17:58,530 --> 00:18:00,397
But it's Alex's employee ID.
334
00:18:00,431 --> 00:18:02,432
Oh, relax. Cindy's a vampire.
335
00:18:02,466 --> 00:18:04,367
She's not going to
show up in the picture.
336
00:18:04,401 --> 00:18:06,368
Come on, Cindy.
337
00:18:06,403 --> 00:18:08,904
Actually, I didn't
know I was going first.
338
00:18:08,938 --> 00:18:12,774
I thought I was "
taking a picture" with, uh...
339
00:18:13,976 --> 00:18:15,876
...hmmm, Harper.
340
00:18:17,112 --> 00:18:19,413
Uh, Heh-heh. N-n-no,
I don't think we dided that.
341
00:18:19,447 --> 00:18:22,582
Yes, we did. You were going
to "take a picture" wh Alex,
342
00:18:22,617 --> 00:18:25,818
who is, frankly,
slightly more bitter.
343
00:18:25,852 --> 00:18:29,521
Would somebody take my picture?
I'm cramping up over here.
344
00:18:29,556 --> 00:18:32,757
All right, fine.
345
00:18:34,159 --> 00:18:35,660
Alex! Harper!
346
00:18:35,694 --> 00:18:37,261
What are you guys doing here?
347
00:18:37,563 --> 00:18:39,964
I'm in the middle of
getting my company ID.
348
00:18:41,099 --> 00:18:45,035
Juliet, I kind of fibbed
about me and Justin.
349
00:18:45,069 --> 00:18:46,769
- You know what? That can wait.
- Why?
350
00:18:47,137 --> 00:18:48,871
Because those vampires are
about to suck your blood.
351
00:18:48,905 --> 00:18:50,106
What?!
352
00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:53,776
You're right, we can
just talk about it later.
353
00:18:53,810 --> 00:18:55,277
Is this true, Cindy?
354
00:18:55,312 --> 00:18:57,880
Yeah well, kind of, I mean...
355
00:18:57,914 --> 00:19:00,516
It's not so bad.
It's just like a mosquito bite.
356
00:19:00,550 --> 00:19:03,385
And then all your blood is gone.
357
00:19:03,419 --> 00:19:06,054
Mom, Dad, you said you weren't
gonna do this anymore.
358
00:19:06,089 --> 00:19:07,756
Are we gonna have to move again?
359
00:19:07,790 --> 00:19:09,091
I know this embarrasses you,
360
00:19:09,626 --> 00:19:12,160
but unfortunately, it's who we are.
We're vampires.
361
00:19:12,195 --> 00:19:14,963
We can't all have the incredible
self-control that you have.
362
00:19:14,998 --> 00:19:17,666
Wait a minute. So you two were
planning this the whole time?
363
00:19:17,701 --> 00:19:19,234
Unbelievable.
364
00:19:19,269 --> 00:19:23,071
Well, maybe this goes
without saying, but I quit.
365
00:19:24,674 --> 00:19:29,677
I, uh, kinda need the job,
so I'm gonna take my chances.
366
00:19:29,712 --> 00:19:31,345
You know what?
367
00:19:31,380 --> 00:19:34,014
I haven't eaten anything in the
six months we've been here.
368
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:36,684
And maybe opening a sandwich
shop four doors down
369
00:19:36,718 --> 00:19:38,953
from another sandwich shop
wasn't such a good idea,
370
00:19:38,987 --> 00:19:42,856
so I'm cool with drinking some
blood and movin' to Phoenix.
371
00:19:42,891 --> 00:19:44,858
Mom?
372
00:19:44,893 --> 00:19:46,493
Dad?
373
00:19:46,528 --> 00:19:50,364
Harper! Oh, we've come to save you
374
00:19:51,266 --> 00:19:52,466
What about me?
375
00:19:52,567 --> 00:19:56,203
You guys. We're here
to save you guys.
376
00:19:56,971 --> 00:19:58,805
Max!
377
00:20:01,042 --> 00:20:03,110
Did they bite her? Did I miss it?
378
00:20:03,144 --> 00:20:04,911
Who is that boy?
379
00:20:04,945 --> 00:20:07,680
Get him away from us!
380
00:20:07,715 --> 00:20:09,282
What's going on?
381
00:20:09,317 --> 00:20:10,884
It's like they're afraid
of Max or something.
382
00:20:11,318 --> 00:20:13,919
No, it's not Max, it's his smell.
383
00:20:13,954 --> 00:20:15,220
Believe it or not,
384
00:20:15,689 --> 00:20:17,556
this isn't even one
of his worst days.
385
00:20:17,590 --> 00:20:21,359
No, it's the pumpkin.
Vampires hate pumpkin.
386
00:20:21,394 --> 00:20:24,398
More than garlic. That's why
people originally put...
387
00:20:24,432 --> 00:20:26,868
...pumpkins outside their
house on Halloween,
388
00:20:26,902 --> 00:20:28,469
to keep away the vampires.
389
00:20:28,503 --> 00:20:30,304
Please make it stop!
390
00:20:30,339 --> 00:20:35,009
Just get that awful,
awful boy away from us!
391
00:20:35,044 --> 00:20:37,645
Not until you...
392
00:20:37,679 --> 00:20:41,115
Not until you apologize for
almost biting my daughter's neck
393
00:20:41,150 --> 00:20:44,052
and turning her into a
vampire for all eternity.
394
00:20:44,086 --> 00:20:46,421
All right, all right. We're sorry.
395
00:20:46,455 --> 00:20:49,857
What if we smooth it over with
a little bit of ice cream?
396
00:20:49,892 --> 00:20:53,928
Really? You were just about to
turn our daughter into a vampire
397
00:20:53,962 --> 00:20:57,298
and you think you can just
smooth it over with ice cream?
398
00:20:57,332 --> 00:20:58,933
So you don't want the ice cream?
399
00:20:59,101 --> 00:21:01,001
- No, we want the ice cream.
- Jerry!
400
00:21:01,035 --> 00:21:06,237
Um... and I think we
need more of an apology.
401
00:21:07,706 --> 00:21:09,339
Unlimited toppings?
402
00:21:09,374 --> 00:21:12,042
I accept your apology.
I'll take mine in a cup.
403
00:21:13,644 --> 00:21:16,079
Dad, they were just about
to drink our blood.
404
00:21:16,113 --> 00:21:19,015
That's right. This is unacceptable.
405
00:21:19,049 --> 00:21:22,885
Harper was gonna be the one to
take care of us in our old age.
406
00:21:22,919 --> 00:21:24,753
Yes!
407
00:21:26,189 --> 00:21:28,857
Alright. I'll make dinner, too.
408
00:21:28,891 --> 00:21:31,192
Who's up for some
really rare steaks?
409
00:21:34,396 --> 00:21:37,564
Hey, Pumpkin Boy. Go take a shower.
410
00:21:37,598 --> 00:21:40,466
And hurry back if you want a steak.
411
00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:42,535
OK, listen guys,
we start out with salad.
412
00:21:42,569 --> 00:21:45,170
No butter, no fries,
and water instead of soda.
413
00:21:45,204 --> 00:21:47,873
Would somebody bite her?
414
00:21:55,126 --> 00:21:57,060
You're totally
checking out my neck.
415
00:21:57,095 --> 00:21:59,997
No, I'm not. I had a big breakfast.
416
00:22:00,031 --> 00:22:02,633
- You are so cute.
- No, you are.
417
00:22:02,667 --> 00:22:04,201
Nose kiss!
418
00:22:06,238 --> 00:22:09,373
Ugh. We are trying to enjoy
419
00:22:09,407 --> 00:22:12,943
about a ton of pumpkin
pie over here, people.
420
00:22:15,180 --> 00:22:17,381
You know, we're gonna have
to eat this whole thing,
421
00:22:17,416 --> 00:22:19,316
because it's not gonna
fit in the fridge.
422
00:22:20,651 --> 00:22:23,018
Can you hand me that big spoon?
423
00:22:24,686 --> 00:22:26,186
Jerry, that's a shovel.
424
00:22:26,955 --> 00:22:30,189
I know what it's called.
425
00:22:30,239 --> 00:22:34,789
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