Original subtitles

- ? Rise of the ?

? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ?

? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ?

? Rise of the ?

? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ?

? Heroes in the half-shell Turtle power ?

? Rising up against evil paint the city green ?

? Raph is ready for a fight Leo's making a scene ?

? Mikey's got mad skills Donnie rocks machines ?

? With each other they discover ?

? Their destiny and rise ?

? Cowabunga ?

? Rise of the ?

? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ?

? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ?

? Heroes in the half-shell Turtle power ?

? Rise ?

- I'm calling it now, boys.

This will be our easiest mission ever.

- Yes! Dad said all we have to do

is return this one Lou Jitsu DVD he rented for us--

- Back to the video store before midnight

and I will give you all hugs

and um, I will also throw in-- - Ah!

- Yes! - Deal!

- No take backs!

[tires screeching]

- I forget. What happens if we don't return

the DVD before midnight?

- Then Splinter gets charged extra.

It's called a... "late fee."

- Or was it zombie apocalypse?

I don't remember, but we can't afford either.

Now let's return this DVD so we can go home and get hugs.

- All right! Hugs! - Ho-ho, yeah!

Great call on the disguises, guys.

They really help us blend in with all the people--

[wind howls]

Wait, where is everyone?

[all scream]

[tools whirring, bell dinging]

[foghorn blares] - That didn't go so well,

but on the upside, we get to ride the ferry

to another DVD store!

- So we didn't see all the "warning: demolition" signs.

No biggie. - Yeah.

And my horoscope didn't say anything

about reading signs so--oh! Wet paint?

My horoscope betrayed me. We're cursed!

We'll never return our DVD before midnight!

- Easy, Michael. Easy.

Back in ancient times, early 2002,

there were boxes, or "kiosks,"

where you could rent and/or return DVDs,

and I just plotted every one in New York

to the Tank's GPS, you're welcome,

so as soon as we dock-- - We can finish our mission

and go get Splinter's warm and fuzzy hugs?

- Yes! And the ferry's just about ready to dock.

- Easiest mission ever! - Uh, folks, a, uh,

movie production has the harbor, uhh, closed.

[foghorn blares]

[gunfire, planes whooshing]

- [roaring]

- Cut! Cut-cut-cut!

Find that monkey's talent and bring it to set!

- New York. What a town.

- We're stuck! Oh!

Now I'll never know if Splinter's whiskers tickle.

- Oh, you will know, Mikey. New plan!

We swim to the nearest DVD kiosk.

- Which is approximately 1.0 nautical miles that direction.

- Still a piece of cake.

[adventurous music]

[video game beeping, playful music]

- Okay, okay, okay, my turn.

If Lou Jitsu and Jupiter Jim

make a crossover movie,

and that movie is a kid

with pro basketball skills:

that's me, baby!

- Not bad, not bad. But look.

- [groans] - The DVD kiosk!

- Ah, the sweet stink of victory.

- Gentlemen, we clear a path to the return slot:

we are home free.

- Easiest. Mission. Ever.

- [screeching] [all scream]

- [squealing] - No!

No, no, no, no, no! Bad mutant Silverfish.

- [squawks] - Save the kiosk!

- Ah-ee-yah! - [screeching]

- Ow!

- [groaning]

- [throaty screeches]

- [groans]

[yelping]

- Raph-a-roni's got a New York treat for ya...

Eat this, bug!

[grunts]

[electricity crackles]

[all screeching]

[nervous chuckle] Wha--oops. My bad.

- It's fine. We're fine.

It's two hours before midnight

and Donnie said there's tons

of these DVD kiosks nearby,

right, Donnie baby?

- Phew, okay. There's the next kiosk.

Raph, if you would, please.

- Um, excuse me, sir--

- You shall not pass!

- Oh, what a town. - Ugh.

We don't have time for this. Next!

[light hip-hop music]

[foghorn honks]

- Okay, here we are, boys, with plenty of time to spare.

[subway train whooshes]

- Raph, if you would please do the honors and return our DVD.

? ?

- Well, uh--[nervous chuckle]

Hey, uh, have you guys seen--

all: Seriously? - Oh. Yeah.

I left the DVD in the Tank where it's safe

when Donnie made us swim across the harbor.

- Gasp! That was your idea!

- Well, sometimes Raph's ideas and mistakes

are the same thing, all right? - [groans]

This was supposed to be easy.

- New, new plan.

- It's been a few hours, so I bet that ferry is

back at the dock. Let's go get our Tank and DVD.

- The ferry's too far, and we're running out of time.

We'll never get Splinter's hugs!

- In that case, for speed, efficiency, and fun,

may I suggest New York's most enjoyably unreliable

and deliciously claustrophobic mode of transit?

The subway! both: Ah.

- [growling]

- Whose hand is that? That's a hand, right?

Who is touching me? - I feel like I can feel

Dad's hugs, and spoiler alert,

they are plush.

- You have invaded the Dragonmaster's personal space!

- Harbor Ferry, exit now.

- New York. What a town.

- [panting, grunts]

[giddy tip-toeing]

- Okay, I'm up, I'm up. Ready?

If Halley's Comet and improvisational comedy

had a kid with a mysterious superstar's leather jacket:

that is me.

- A DVD kiosk! all: Yes!

- My horoscope said I would point out the obvious today.

- Raph was parked next to this the whole time!

- Relax. We're here. We made it!

- And with a little time to spare!

BRB with the DVD, B-R-O-Ses.

all: Hugs! Hugs! Hugs! Hugs! [scream]

Brake-brake-brake-brake! Brake!

[electricity sizzles]

[kiosk powers down]

[solemn music]

all: No!

- What else could possibly go wrong?

- Peek-a-boo, tortugas.

Yoink!

all: Ghostbear?

- Last time we met,

you ruined my pro wrestling career.

both: Hurricane!

[dinging]

- [groaning]

- Cowabunga!

- Now, I will ruin what you love.

Starting with your precious disc of video.

Lou Jitsu movies are est?pido.

- You take that back!

Unless est?pido means "brilliant!"

- [cackling]

- New, new-new plan. Tortoise gets the bear.

all: Yes.

[tires squealing]

- You tortugas can't catch me!

- Why are there wizards in the middle of the street?

- It's Wizard Con, baby!

- Slay the steel dragon!

- Hey! I'm casting here!

- Leo, Mikey, launch the Shell Hogs.

- [laughs] Oh, I love your little tricycle!

- You shall not pass!

- Ah!

[tires screeching]

[crashes]

[electricity fizzles]

- I can fix this. I can fix this.

I can totally fix this! - Hey, Donnie.

If you got any more secret vehicles,

now's the time to be a good brother and share.

- Uh, well, there is this one thing.

But I haven't tested it yet, so...

- Tests are easy. It's answers that are hard.

- I love you so much. Let's do it!

[engine powering up]

[car horns honking]

[dramatic music]

- Give us back our DVD, Ghost-jerk!

[chain clanking]

- Make me, buf?n naranja!

- Ow!

Raph, Donnie, where are you guys?

both: Coming in fast!

- This is awesome!

- Where'd everybody go!?

- That gives me a reckless idea!

- [grunts] - [blows raspberry]

? ?

Come on, portal, portal, portal!

Yeah! - You're blocking the portal!

- Oh, no.

[both scream]

[all scream]

[thudding]

- Savage wizardry! What black magic was that?

- Look! Another DVD store.

If we get ours back, we can still pull this off!

[both screaming]

Ah!

[heavy breath]

Two minutes to midnight, maidens.

- [laughing hysterically]

You fell out of the sky like, "Wah!"

And ruined your little toy.

- You have no idea what we've been through tonight.

And on top of it all you steal our DVD?

- Is that any way to treat a fan?

- Here we go. - Groan.

- Nya-nya-nya.

I can tell how much you want

this DVD... for watching.

- Actually, we really need to return--

[chokes] - Eh-eh-eh.

Return to the first scene because, uh,

we want to watch it so badly.

- Yeah. Only the cruelest of villains

would drop our DVD in that return slot over there

and then confirm that it did in fact drop all the way down.

- Ooh. Foolish, tortugas!

Never reveal your weakness to an enemy.

[giddy murmur]

[nervous whining]

[louder nervous whining]

- Ha! Now you will never watch the movie!

Admit it, I have ruined your--huh?

Huh?

No!

[character speaking foreign language]

- [gasps] - We returned your DVD.

And now you owe us...

all: Hugs! Hugs! Hugs! - It's happening!

- Okay, you have earned...this! all: Yeah!

[murmuring happily]

- [choked up] Ah, I will never forget this feeling.

- I love all my sons.

All five of you.

- [strained] New York. What a town!

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