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They're creepy and they're kooky
3
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Mysterious and spooky
4
00:00:21,927 --> 00:00:23,758
They're altogether ooky
5
00:00:23,930 --> 00:00:25,648
The Addams family
6
00:00:25,933 --> 00:00:27,764
The house is a museum
7
00:00:27,977 --> 00:00:29,808
When people come to see 'em
8
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They really are a scream
9
00:00:31,941 --> 00:00:33,613
The Addams family
10
00:00:34,945 --> 00:00:36,298
Neat.
11
00:00:36,739 --> 00:00:37,854
Sweet.
12
00:00:40,535 --> 00:00:41,570
Petite.
13
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So get a witch's shawl on
14
00:00:43,831 --> 00:00:45,628
A broomstick you can crawl on
15
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We're gonna pay a call on
16
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The Addams family
17
00:01:11,744 --> 00:01:15,737
Marvelous idea, Morticia,
putting this old saw together again.
18
00:01:16,083 --> 00:01:18,881
I thought it would be nice for Uncle Fester.
19
00:01:19,420 --> 00:01:22,014
This is fun. Makes me all goose-bumpy.
20
00:01:22,424 --> 00:01:25,939
It's always so exciting
seeing how these games turn out.
21
00:01:26,179 --> 00:01:28,647
Just about another foot to go, old man.
22
00:01:31,186 --> 00:01:32,858
Zounds.
23
00:01:33,564 --> 00:01:35,361
- The electricity's gone off.
- Sure!
24
00:01:36,276 --> 00:01:38,631
I knew something would spoil it.
25
00:01:38,821 --> 00:01:42,052
Now, now, Uncle Fester,
it only missed you by a hair.
26
00:01:42,284 --> 00:01:43,717
No matter, I'll get another fuse.
27
00:01:43,870 --> 00:01:48,625
No, forget it. I'm out of the mood now.
I'll be up in my tree house.
28
00:01:51,296 --> 00:01:53,810
Gomez, darling, wasn't that the doorbell?
29
00:01:54,008 --> 00:01:57,125
I believe it was.
That means the electricity is okay.
30
00:01:57,346 --> 00:02:00,179
It must have been Uncle Fester
who blew a fuse.
31
00:02:00,392 --> 00:02:02,701
I'll have Pugsley bring him a fresh one.
32
00:02:05,607 --> 00:02:07,518
Miss Ophelia.
33
00:02:11,323 --> 00:02:13,473
Ophelia, what a surprise.
34
00:02:14,410 --> 00:02:19,165
Oh, dear brother-in-law,
you behold the most miserable of women.
35
00:02:19,459 --> 00:02:21,654
Well, you are that. But what happened?
36
00:02:25,342 --> 00:02:28,140
Throckmorton didn't like that.
He jilted me.
37
00:02:28,346 --> 00:02:31,702
Montrose didn't like it.
Throckmorton didn't like it.
38
00:02:33,060 --> 00:02:35,051
Bunch of spoilsports.
39
00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:38,040
Well, look on the bright side, Ophelia.
40
00:02:38,818 --> 00:02:40,615
Just because you've been jilted
once or twice,
41
00:02:40,779 --> 00:02:42,531
it doesn't mean you are unattractive.
42
00:02:42,698 --> 00:02:46,373
You're very attractive,
and strong as an ox.
43
00:02:46,828 --> 00:02:50,867
- Hi, Aunt Ophelia.
- Oh, Pugsley, this is a tragic day.
44
00:02:51,126 --> 00:02:52,559
What happened?
45
00:02:56,049 --> 00:02:57,801
Throckmorton didn't like that.
46
00:02:57,968 --> 00:03:01,722
Now, Pugsley, you can see why
your Aunt Ophelia's heart is broken.
47
00:03:01,974 --> 00:03:03,805
Her heart and my back.
48
00:03:03,976 --> 00:03:05,853
Ophelia, I thought I heard you.
49
00:03:06,021 --> 00:03:10,094
Oh, Uncle Fester, you behold
a most wretched woman.
50
00:03:11,111 --> 00:03:12,544
Say, you do look better.
51
00:03:12,696 --> 00:03:14,288
Ophelia's been jilted.
52
00:03:14,449 --> 00:03:16,963
- Again?
- Practically left at the altar.
53
00:03:17,870 --> 00:03:19,189
What happened?
54
00:03:23,335 --> 00:03:25,644
Throckmorton didn't like being judoed.
55
00:03:25,839 --> 00:03:28,478
You sure do have a weakness
for weirdoes.
56
00:03:29,093 --> 00:03:31,129
Nobody loves me for myself.
57
00:03:31,805 --> 00:03:33,921
Well, that's understandable.
58
00:03:34,100 --> 00:03:35,658
Have you tried offering money?
59
00:03:35,810 --> 00:03:38,324
But, Father, isn't that undignified?
60
00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:40,990
Very, and besides, it doesn't work.
61
00:03:41,193 --> 00:03:44,868
Oh, cheer up, Aunt Ophelia,
you'll make a very nice old maid.
62
00:03:48,828 --> 00:03:51,900
Ophelia, maybe you're a bit too anxious.
63
00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:55,419
Men like their women mysterious, elusive.
64
00:03:55,712 --> 00:03:57,270
That's my type.
65
00:03:57,589 --> 00:04:01,707
I'm afraid I should go upstairs and rest.
I just have no more strength.
66
00:04:06,351 --> 00:04:08,546
You see, he only went six feet.
67
00:04:13,193 --> 00:04:15,024
There's no hope for me.
68
00:04:16,782 --> 00:04:18,613
Did I hear my sister Ophelia?
69
00:04:19,577 --> 00:04:22,853
- Who else leaves me black and blue?
- Oh, mon cher.
70
00:04:23,833 --> 00:04:27,109
- That's French.
- Darling, please, Ophelia first.
71
00:04:28,255 --> 00:04:29,290
I'm next.
72
00:04:30,425 --> 00:04:33,462
Well, I think I'll go work
on Ophelia's problem.
73
00:04:34,722 --> 00:04:39,159
Oh, poor Ophelia.
She seems destined not to find love.
74
00:04:39,812 --> 00:04:41,928
Perhaps we could find something
to divert her.
75
00:04:42,107 --> 00:04:44,177
Some sort of career, perhaps.
76
00:04:44,360 --> 00:04:46,635
Maybe she could go to Japan
and take up sumo wrestling.
77
00:04:46,822 --> 00:04:49,700
She tried that.
That's how she lost Horatio.
78
00:04:50,535 --> 00:04:53,732
I have it, science.
The world needs another Madame Curie.
79
00:04:53,956 --> 00:04:56,948
Excellent! We'll give her a few
of Pugsley's chemicals,
80
00:04:57,169 --> 00:05:00,002
and she can mix, mix, mix
until she discovers something.
81
00:05:00,214 --> 00:05:02,569
- But what?
- I don't know.
82
00:05:02,759 --> 00:05:05,319
Perhaps she could mix herself
another man.
83
00:05:16,736 --> 00:05:18,294
I think I'm beginning to get something.
84
00:05:18,447 --> 00:05:21,564
You know, this reminds me
of Sir Newton Addams.
85
00:05:21,785 --> 00:05:23,741
When he made his scientific discoveries?
86
00:05:23,913 --> 00:05:26,473
No, when he set his house on fire.
87
00:05:26,666 --> 00:05:29,578
Oh, yes, that was the high point
of his career.
88
00:05:29,795 --> 00:05:32,263
- Well, shall we begin?
- Right.
89
00:05:32,674 --> 00:05:34,266
- Powder.
- Powder.
90
00:05:37,097 --> 00:05:38,849
- Water.
- Water.
91
00:05:44,607 --> 00:05:47,246
- Hydrochloric acid.
- Hydrochloric acid.
92
00:05:51,282 --> 00:05:53,955
- Tincture of benzoin.
- Tincture of benzoin.
93
00:05:56,289 --> 00:05:58,757
- Salicylic acid.
- Salicylic acid.
94
00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:03,483
Uncle Fester, you keep giving me
the same test tube all the time.
95
00:06:03,716 --> 00:06:07,152
Yeah, I know, I mixed them all together.
It saves test tubes.
96
00:06:07,763 --> 00:06:09,242
Very shrewd.
97
00:06:11,810 --> 00:06:15,405
- Now then, the black bottle.
- The black bottle.
98
00:06:19,278 --> 00:06:21,746
- The white bottle.
- The white bottle.
99
00:06:25,661 --> 00:06:28,016
- The blue bottle.
- The blue bottle.
100
00:06:31,836 --> 00:06:34,225
- The green bottle.
- The green bottle.
101
00:06:35,007 --> 00:06:37,237
- No, you don't.
- Why not?
102
00:06:37,928 --> 00:06:40,203
That's my after-shave lotion.
103
00:06:40,389 --> 00:06:45,144
- Uncle Fester, that's sulfuric acid.
- Yeah, I know, it's real tangy.
104
00:06:50,236 --> 00:06:53,433
There's something
about a sulfuric acid man.
105
00:07:04,505 --> 00:07:07,542
There's nothing like
a quiet afternoon of culture.
106
00:07:08,343 --> 00:07:11,619
Darling, perhaps Ophelia
should devote herself to art.
107
00:07:15,728 --> 00:07:18,640
You may be right.
Science doesn't seem to be it.
108
00:07:18,857 --> 00:07:19,892
Here it is 3:00.
109
00:07:20,025 --> 00:07:22,937
Ophelia's been up there mixing chemicals
for two hours and nothing.
110
00:07:23,155 --> 00:07:26,306
Well, we must be patient
with these new scientists.
111
00:07:26,534 --> 00:07:30,083
After all, dear, she hasn't the faintest idea
of what she is doing.
112
00:07:32,334 --> 00:07:34,529
See, I think she stumbled onto something.
113
00:07:34,712 --> 00:07:37,624
- Sounds like something big.
- I'll go see what it is.
114
00:07:42,681 --> 00:07:45,149
Congratulations, Ophelia. What happened?
115
00:07:45,351 --> 00:07:49,708
I discovered that if I mixed the blue stuff
with the green stuff...
116
00:07:50,399 --> 00:07:54,517
Well, science is definitely out.
But don't worry, we'll think of something.
117
00:07:54,780 --> 00:07:56,498
There's no hope for me.
118
00:08:04,001 --> 00:08:09,439
'Tis the last rose of summer
119
00:08:09,758 --> 00:08:14,149
That is blooming all alone
120
00:08:14,723 --> 00:08:18,716
That is exquisite, unbelievable.
It's this room.
121
00:08:19,021 --> 00:08:21,410
This room of art and beauty.
122
00:08:21,607 --> 00:08:24,724
Ophelia, we've found your career.
You could be an opera singer.
123
00:08:24,945 --> 00:08:26,094
Me, an opera singer?
124
00:08:26,239 --> 00:08:28,707
- Well, you'll have to put on a little weight.
- Oh, I will, I will.
125
00:08:28,909 --> 00:08:31,946
Yes, your voice will need a little polishing
and I know just the right little polish.
126
00:08:32,163 --> 00:08:34,472
- Cousin Itt.
- Exactly, I'll go find him.
127
00:08:40,675 --> 00:08:42,028
Oh, Cousin Itt.
128
00:08:45,431 --> 00:08:47,308
- Morticia, I have wonderful news.
- What is it, dear?
129
00:08:47,475 --> 00:08:49,147
Ophelia is on a threshold of a new career.
130
00:08:49,311 --> 00:08:52,428
I know, she told me all about it.
Isn't it exciting?
131
00:08:52,649 --> 00:08:55,038
Certainly is. Cousin Itt!
132
00:08:57,572 --> 00:09:00,245
Itt, now you come down here this minute.
133
00:09:02,704 --> 00:09:06,583
Playful and sneaky, too.
My dear, would you mind giving it a try?
134
00:09:07,377 --> 00:09:09,732
Cousin Itt, it's an emergency.
135
00:09:15,304 --> 00:09:18,853
No, Cousin Itt, the house isn't on fire.
But we do have another emergency.
136
00:09:19,101 --> 00:09:21,296
Ophelia wants to learn how to sing.
137
00:09:21,771 --> 00:09:23,363
Wait. We need you.
138
00:09:23,899 --> 00:09:27,096
Gomez, darling,
are you sure Cousin Itt is our man?
139
00:09:27,529 --> 00:09:30,965
He spent 15 years at
the West African Institute for Music.
140
00:09:31,200 --> 00:09:33,839
- Teaching?
- Supplying hair for violin bows.
141
00:09:35,372 --> 00:09:37,522
Oh, well, in that case,
142
00:09:37,709 --> 00:09:40,542
Cousin Itt, what do you think
sister Ophelia's chances are?
143
00:09:43,633 --> 00:09:44,986
Certainly, you have an opinion?
144
00:09:46,596 --> 00:09:48,314
With lots of hard work.
145
00:09:49,433 --> 00:09:51,264
And serious intense study.
146
00:09:53,855 --> 00:09:55,766
That's your considered opinion?
147
00:09:58,486 --> 00:09:59,965
Well, at least there's hope.
148
00:10:00,239 --> 00:10:03,515
And a true artist lives on hope,
as long as he has a strong constitution.
149
00:10:03,743 --> 00:10:07,531
We'll start immediately.
I'll have Lurch accompany Ophelia.
150
00:10:12,881 --> 00:10:14,951
Oh, dear, this one's out of order.
151
00:10:15,134 --> 00:10:16,283
No problem.
152
00:10:25,147 --> 00:10:26,375
You rang?
153
00:10:26,524 --> 00:10:29,357
Lurch, how would you like to be
Ophelia's accompanist?
154
00:10:31,405 --> 00:10:34,317
Dear Lurch, he's such an enthusiast.
155
00:10:35,536 --> 00:10:37,254
Cousin Itt, take over.
156
00:10:38,790 --> 00:10:41,623
Darling, I think we should leave
the music lovers alone.
157
00:10:41,836 --> 00:10:45,465
Lurch will get Ophelia.
Let's go to the playroom and read.
158
00:10:46,133 --> 00:10:49,443
I've got a better idea.
Let's go to the playroom and play.
159
00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:54,272
- Hang onto these.
- Thank you, darling.
160
00:10:54,811 --> 00:10:57,279
Now, it's really quite simple.
161
00:10:57,482 --> 00:11:00,201
When Fester blows the whistle,
play starts.
162
00:11:01,111 --> 00:11:04,262
The first player to get the puck
to the opposite wall scores.
163
00:11:04,491 --> 00:11:06,800
Oh, but darling, isn't this supposed
to be played on the ice?
164
00:11:06,994 --> 00:11:09,064
- That's too slippery.
- Very sensible.
165
00:11:09,247 --> 00:11:11,397
- All right, you two. Are you ready?
- Ready.
166
00:11:28,273 --> 00:11:30,503
Gomez, darling, I do believe he's trying
to tell us something.
167
00:11:30,693 --> 00:11:32,490
Come now, Fester, speak up.
168
00:11:35,157 --> 00:11:37,466
Oh, now, Fester,
you can speak more clearly than that.
169
00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:48,192
Oh, my, Ophelia upstairs studying opera,
and now this.
170
00:11:48,466 --> 00:11:50,297
We're getting to be quite a musical family.
171
00:11:50,469 --> 00:11:52,505
Either that or he swallowed his whistle.
172
00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:55,797
Uncle Fester, I've warned you
about those between-meal snacks.
173
00:11:56,018 --> 00:11:58,691
Querida, how many calories in a whistle?
174
00:12:00,858 --> 00:12:02,576
Well, are you ready?
175
00:12:05,990 --> 00:12:07,582
Now, back to the game.
176
00:12:09,077 --> 00:12:12,353
Gomez, darling, don't you think
we should check on Ophelia?
177
00:12:12,582 --> 00:12:14,698
Cousin Itt must have her singing
like a bird now.
178
00:12:14,876 --> 00:12:16,628
- A canary?
- A vulture.
179
00:12:17,338 --> 00:12:18,657
Dreamer!
180
00:12:21,635 --> 00:12:23,705
We couldn't stand the suspense
any longer.
181
00:12:23,888 --> 00:12:25,685
How goes it with our little songbird?
182
00:12:25,849 --> 00:12:28,841
Dear Cousin Itt,
he's taught me everything he knows.
183
00:12:30,397 --> 00:12:31,796
Even more?
184
00:12:31,941 --> 00:12:34,614
Generous to a fault. Well, fire away.
185
00:12:53,010 --> 00:12:55,285
By george, he has taught her
everything he knows.
186
00:12:55,472 --> 00:12:56,791
Down to the last...
187
00:12:58,017 --> 00:13:01,896
But, Cousin Itt, in opera,
don't they sing in Italian?
188
00:13:03,900 --> 00:13:05,458
That was Italian?
189
00:13:12,244 --> 00:13:14,439
Really temperamental, those long hairs.
190
00:13:14,623 --> 00:13:18,855
Oh, dear, just as my career
was blossoming, it's nipped in the bud.
191
00:13:19,546 --> 00:13:23,061
Not yet, Ophelia dear,
we'll get you another teacher.
192
00:13:23,301 --> 00:13:26,373
I know just the man, Ophelia.
Signor Bellini.
193
00:13:26,597 --> 00:13:28,713
Darling, are you sure he's available
for house calls?
194
00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:31,690
Querida, Signor Bellini is an artist.
195
00:13:31,896 --> 00:13:35,855
And artists are always ready
to sacrifice for art, if the price is right.
196
00:13:36,110 --> 00:13:38,749
Let's see how much money
we have on hand.
197
00:13:46,582 --> 00:13:48,300
You rang?
198
00:13:48,501 --> 00:13:50,731
Now that's what I call functional art.
199
00:13:52,381 --> 00:13:54,531
We're out of petty cash, Lurch.
200
00:13:59,599 --> 00:14:01,112
In the barrel, please.
201
00:14:05,899 --> 00:14:07,093
Thank you, Lurch.
202
00:14:07,234 --> 00:14:09,350
More in ice-box.
203
00:14:09,529 --> 00:14:12,407
Good thinking.
There's nothing like cold cash.
204
00:14:28,513 --> 00:14:30,469
Stop. Stop, stop!
205
00:14:31,517 --> 00:14:33,189
Is something wrong, Signor Bellini?
206
00:14:33,352 --> 00:14:35,707
No, except that in my 20 years
207
00:14:35,897 --> 00:14:38,730
of coaching the greats, near greats
and even ingrates,
208
00:14:38,943 --> 00:14:42,652
I have never heard such squawking,
squeaking and screeching
209
00:14:42,907 --> 00:14:44,420
from a human throat.
210
00:14:44,576 --> 00:14:47,693
I have a feeling
Signor Bellini isn't too impressed.
211
00:14:48,539 --> 00:14:52,327
Nonsense. These maestros only abuse
the students they love.
212
00:14:52,795 --> 00:14:54,353
Shall we try it again, maestro?
213
00:14:54,506 --> 00:14:57,464
Who cares? I've already got ulcers.
214
00:15:04,686 --> 00:15:06,278
Is that better, signor?
215
00:15:08,441 --> 00:15:11,274
Would you like me to show you
just how much better?
216
00:15:11,486 --> 00:15:13,522
Yes, Signor Bellini, yes.
217
00:15:18,454 --> 00:15:19,887
Temper.
218
00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:23,430
You're right.
I could have broken a perfectly good cane.
219
00:15:25,130 --> 00:15:28,805
He's really a taskmaster.
He's trying to bring Ophelia out.
220
00:15:29,052 --> 00:15:32,010
If he ever hits her,
they'll have to carry her out.
221
00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:35,840
Signorina Frump,
I can't take anymore today.
222
00:15:36,061 --> 00:15:39,497
Tomorrow I come back for another fee...
Lesson.
223
00:15:39,732 --> 00:15:42,644
- Just practice.
- Which part shall I practice?
224
00:15:43,070 --> 00:15:46,062
Sing them all. All at once, for all I care.
225
00:15:46,283 --> 00:15:48,080
Oh, you mean like this?
226
00:16:02,054 --> 00:16:04,522
Could you do that again?
Or didn't I hear what I heard?
227
00:16:04,724 --> 00:16:08,194
Oh, joy to the world,
I have charmed my maestro
228
00:16:08,771 --> 00:16:13,401
with my simple triple-stop, double-vibrato
vocal harmonium.
229
00:16:22,623 --> 00:16:24,295
A musical miracle.
230
00:16:25,168 --> 00:16:30,162
It's amazing. Beneath all that mediocrity
she has hidden talent.
231
00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:32,583
Perhaps we can bring it out.
232
00:16:32,761 --> 00:16:35,514
If she is willing to work,
and you're willing to pay.
233
00:16:35,724 --> 00:16:37,442
We'll pay anything.
What does she have to do?
234
00:16:37,601 --> 00:16:39,956
First, she must empty her mind
of everything.
235
00:16:40,146 --> 00:16:41,181
That should be no problem.
236
00:16:41,314 --> 00:16:44,784
- She must sing day and night.
- Day and night?
237
00:16:45,028 --> 00:16:48,225
- Night and day.
- Oh, that one she knows.
238
00:16:49,993 --> 00:16:53,269
Starting with scales,
she must work five hours a day.
239
00:16:53,706 --> 00:16:56,823
If she cuts out meals and sleep,
she can work 25 hours a day.
240
00:16:57,044 --> 00:17:00,514
Gomez, darling,
aren't there only 24 hours in a day?
241
00:17:00,757 --> 00:17:03,794
By george, you're right.
She'll just have to sing faster.
242
00:17:05,013 --> 00:17:07,925
In three months
I'll have her ready to audition.
243
00:17:09,352 --> 00:17:10,990
Better make it six.
244
00:17:12,773 --> 00:17:14,729
Morticia, that's French.
245
00:17:16,361 --> 00:17:19,797
- Gomez, darling, we have a guest.
- Oh, pardon me.
246
00:17:26,708 --> 00:17:28,539
You rang?
247
00:17:28,711 --> 00:17:31,271
Lurch, would you please show
Mr. Bellini the door.
248
00:17:34,719 --> 00:17:36,516
But I'm not ready to go.
249
00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:39,823
All right, I'm ready.
250
00:17:40,393 --> 00:17:43,271
I want you also to work on her tremolo.
251
00:17:43,481 --> 00:17:47,030
Oh, we will, we will.
I'll put her on a strict diet.
252
00:17:56,581 --> 00:17:59,937
Darling, what an exciting six months
it's been.
253
00:18:00,169 --> 00:18:03,127
And in a few moments,
our Ophelia will be auditioning
254
00:18:03,340 --> 00:18:06,252
for the great impresario Rudolpho himself.
255
00:18:06,469 --> 00:18:09,984
That reminds me, Uncle Fester,
how's Ophelia's throat spray coming?
256
00:18:13,437 --> 00:18:16,031
I think it needs a little splash of ammonia.
257
00:18:16,817 --> 00:18:20,048
The color is getting good.
It is sort of a bilious fuchsia.
258
00:18:20,655 --> 00:18:23,567
- There, I think it's done.
- Well, we'll know in a moment.
259
00:18:27,623 --> 00:18:30,421
- It's perfect.
- Well, got to get it while it's hot.
260
00:18:34,757 --> 00:18:38,272
There you are. Singer's Squirt No. 5.
261
00:18:38,512 --> 00:18:40,582
Thank you, Uncle Fester.
262
00:18:40,849 --> 00:18:46,287
When we spray Ophelia's throat with this,
she'll sing like she never sang before.
263
00:18:49,151 --> 00:18:51,745
That must be Signor Bellini
and the great Rudolpho.
264
00:18:51,947 --> 00:18:55,064
Quick, Uncle Fester,
go upstairs and spray Ophelia.
265
00:18:59,039 --> 00:19:03,555
Signor Bellini and impresario Rudolpho.
266
00:19:10,847 --> 00:19:13,964
Oh, charming,
we've heard so much about you.
267
00:19:14,185 --> 00:19:18,701
Yes, I've heard quite a bit about you, too.
And until today I didn't believe it.
268
00:19:18,983 --> 00:19:22,419
Let's get on with the audition.
What a voice you're going to hear.
269
00:19:22,654 --> 00:19:25,805
Just one moment, Bellini.
Impresario, Gomez Addams here.
270
00:19:26,159 --> 00:19:27,911
Now before we bring on the little lady,
271
00:19:28,078 --> 00:19:29,989
there are few details of contract
to be settled.
272
00:19:30,164 --> 00:19:31,677
First, she's to have star billing.
273
00:19:31,833 --> 00:19:34,472
Star billing?
But I haven't even heard her yet.
274
00:19:34,670 --> 00:19:36,820
Exactly, we can't take any chances.
275
00:19:38,175 --> 00:19:41,770
- We want to see Ophelia's name in lights.
- In lights?
276
00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:44,824
Uncle Fester will supply the electricity.
277
00:19:47,312 --> 00:19:48,870
He can make it flicker.
278
00:19:53,111 --> 00:19:57,582
Now, as to money, salary,
we're prepared to start modestly.
279
00:19:57,868 --> 00:20:00,143
$10,000 a week plus 90% of the gross.
280
00:20:00,329 --> 00:20:03,480
And, of course,
free tickets for every member of the family
281
00:20:03,709 --> 00:20:04,858
at all performances.
282
00:20:05,920 --> 00:20:07,751
Get the girl and let her sing.
283
00:20:07,923 --> 00:20:10,676
In due time, Bellini.
Just one more detail to settle.
284
00:20:10,885 --> 00:20:14,400
Impresario, we don't want Ophelia
doing any of those tired, old operas
285
00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:16,710
by Wagner, Puccini, Verdi.
286
00:20:16,893 --> 00:20:20,169
You see, we feel that a new singer
should have a new opera.
287
00:20:20,398 --> 00:20:23,993
Exactly, and with this in mind,
my dear Morticia has composed one.
288
00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:27,517
It's a frothy little item entitled
Afternoon In A Swamp.
289
00:20:31,997 --> 00:20:36,036
Bellini, if ever I get out of here alive,
you won't be.
290
00:20:37,295 --> 00:20:40,253
Thing, may I please have the contracts?
Thank you.
291
00:20:41,175 --> 00:20:43,609
Now, if you'll just sign the contract.
292
00:20:44,179 --> 00:20:47,854
Signor Gomez, I will not sign anything.
293
00:20:48,101 --> 00:20:49,898
Very well, a handshake is good enough.
294
00:20:50,062 --> 00:20:52,018
Please, humor him. Shake hands.
295
00:21:00,034 --> 00:21:02,104
Here comes my dear sister, Ophelia.
296
00:21:06,835 --> 00:21:08,791
Gentlemen, please be seated.
297
00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:16,358
Play, Signor Lurch.
298
00:21:33,036 --> 00:21:34,992
This is unbelievable.
299
00:21:35,623 --> 00:21:37,181
What have you done to her?
300
00:21:37,333 --> 00:21:40,769
Isn't he the modest one?
It's all Signor Bellini's doing.
301
00:21:41,005 --> 00:21:44,361
All we did was spray her throat
with Uncle Fester's special atomizer.
302
00:21:44,593 --> 00:21:47,312
You fools! You have melted the nodes
on her vocal chord.
303
00:21:47,514 --> 00:21:51,666
Bellini, you are barred
from my opera house.
304
00:21:51,936 --> 00:21:52,925
Even with a ticket.
305
00:21:53,063 --> 00:21:56,180
Impresario Rudolpho,
you haven't heard my wife's opera.
306
00:21:56,401 --> 00:21:58,631
For that I am grateful.
307
00:21:59,029 --> 00:22:02,817
The prejudice against new music.
At least you could hear the finale.
308
00:22:03,285 --> 00:22:04,559
It's truly inspiring.
309
00:22:04,954 --> 00:22:07,422
As the dancers glide
through the quicksand,
310
00:22:07,624 --> 00:22:09,740
the chorus swells triumphantly.
311
00:22:10,127 --> 00:22:14,757
And the prima donna sings
that lovely aria, Afternoon In A Swamp.
312
00:22:18,138 --> 00:22:20,652
Left him speechless.
I knew it would get him.
313
00:22:23,979 --> 00:22:28,097
Hello. Ophelia Frump?
Just a minute, I'll see if she...
314
00:22:28,360 --> 00:22:29,349
That's me.
315
00:22:30,529 --> 00:22:33,202
Throckmorton, lover, angel,
where are you?
316
00:22:33,825 --> 00:22:35,656
In hiding. Yes, of course.
317
00:22:41,419 --> 00:22:42,932
Bye, bye lover.
318
00:22:45,090 --> 00:22:47,479
I'm sorry. I cannot join the opera.
319
00:22:48,178 --> 00:22:49,167
You can't?
320
00:22:49,304 --> 00:22:53,900
Oh, my dear young lady,
this has been a red-letter day for music.
321
00:22:55,187 --> 00:22:57,178
And as for An Afternoon In A Swamp,
322
00:22:58,233 --> 00:23:00,667
this has certainly been one.
323
00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:03,633
I'm sorry, Signor Bellini,
324
00:23:04,032 --> 00:23:06,944
but a woman must place love
before her career.
325
00:23:07,537 --> 00:23:10,256
Forget it.
I'm just going to take a long walk,
326
00:23:11,042 --> 00:23:12,760
against the traffic lights.
327
00:23:15,464 --> 00:23:17,136
What's all this about love and career?
328
00:23:17,300 --> 00:23:18,813
Throckmorton wants me back.
329
00:23:18,969 --> 00:23:21,961
He says he's sure now that
we can be completely compatible.
330
00:23:22,181 --> 00:23:23,899
Oh, what happened?
331
00:23:24,059 --> 00:23:26,095
- He took up judo.
- Judo?
332
00:23:26,270 --> 00:23:27,385
This.
333
00:23:40,247 --> 00:23:42,636
- How're we doing?
- Perfect score, dear.
334
00:23:43,043 --> 00:23:44,840
You've missed 100 out of 100.
335
00:23:51,971 --> 00:23:53,529
The mail's in.
336
00:23:57,103 --> 00:23:58,502
Thank you, Thing.
337
00:23:59,231 --> 00:24:01,347
Gomez, darling,
it's from the Canary Islands.
338
00:24:01,525 --> 00:24:03,481
Strange, we don't know any canaries.
339
00:24:05,197 --> 00:24:08,553
- Oh, it's from my sister Ophelia.
- I wonder what she says.
340
00:24:10,454 --> 00:24:13,014
Oh, she says it was all off between her
and Throckmorton
341
00:24:13,208 --> 00:24:16,518
- from the very first moment they met.
- From the very first moment they met?
342
00:24:16,754 --> 00:24:20,030
He dislocated his shoulder.
But she says she's happy.
343
00:24:20,342 --> 00:24:22,902
She's regained her two-part voice
and it's lovelier than ever.
344
00:24:23,096 --> 00:24:25,530
- She even sent us a record.
- Well, let's give it a listen.
345
00:24:31,858 --> 00:24:35,897
Oh, I'm falling in love
346
00:24:37,532 --> 00:24:39,284
By george, she's done it again.
347
00:24:40,285 --> 00:24:43,595
I must write to her immediately.
I have a lovely idea for her next record.
348
00:24:43,832 --> 00:24:44,867
What, cara mia?
349
00:24:45,000 --> 00:24:47,036
The Sextet from Lucia.
350
00:24:48,036 --> 00:24:58,036
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