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Ninety-six,
3
00:01:34,869 --> 00:01:36,018
ninety-seven,
4
00:01:36,911 --> 00:01:37,946
ninety-eight,
5
00:01:38,912 --> 00:01:40,140
ninety-nine,
6
00:01:40,912 --> 00:01:42,140
one hundred.
7
00:01:42,287 --> 00:01:45,404
- There, that's that.
- Thank you, Mother.
8
00:01:45,622 --> 00:01:49,900
That new cactus brush
really makes my head feel nice and tingly.
9
00:01:50,164 --> 00:01:51,756
Well, I'm glad, darling.
10
00:01:51,915 --> 00:01:55,624
I'll just go upstairs and throw away
your old porcupine-quill brush.
11
00:01:55,874 --> 00:01:59,150
- And thank you, darling.
- My pleasure, cara mia.
12
00:01:59,916 --> 00:02:03,670
- In fact, why don't we go to 200?
- No, thank you.
13
00:02:03,917 --> 00:02:07,751
You can't improve on perfection.
Thanks to you, Fester.
14
00:02:08,001 --> 00:02:10,959
Thanks. And thank you, Thing.
15
00:02:11,169 --> 00:02:13,285
But I would suggest
that you trim that scratcher.
16
00:02:13,461 --> 00:02:15,975
I think I detected a slight hangnail.
17
00:02:21,588 --> 00:02:22,703
Well!
18
00:02:25,547 --> 00:02:27,822
What was that all about?
19
00:02:28,006 --> 00:02:30,395
He'd be a real sorehead, if he had a head.
20
00:02:30,590 --> 00:02:33,263
Thing has been a bit off lately.
Moody, he's morose.
21
00:02:33,465 --> 00:02:35,421
Hardly ever plays his castanets
for us anymore.
22
00:02:35,591 --> 00:02:39,948
Tish, doing those fiery flamencos with you
always made my blood run hot.
23
00:02:40,509 --> 00:02:42,306
Come, querida, let's do one now.
24
00:02:44,551 --> 00:02:48,146
Oh, no, darling, it's just not the same
without Thing's castanets.
25
00:02:48,385 --> 00:02:50,421
I could click my teeth for you.
26
00:02:52,761 --> 00:02:55,321
No, Uncle Fester,
I'm afraid you don't get the same beat.
27
00:02:55,512 --> 00:02:57,104
You don't have very musical molars.
28
00:02:58,971 --> 00:03:03,044
- Darling, why won't Thing play for us?
- Who knows? Temperament.
29
00:03:04,889 --> 00:03:05,924
Mama.
30
00:03:07,723 --> 00:03:09,873
Has Thing been acting strangely lately?
31
00:03:11,099 --> 00:03:14,455
Why should I know?
To me he's always strange.
32
00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:22,875
Wednesday?
33
00:03:28,311 --> 00:03:29,426
Fester?
34
00:03:29,561 --> 00:03:32,553
If you ask me,
Claude Cuticle is a spoilsport.
35
00:03:34,187 --> 00:03:37,623
Darling, why is everyone so resentful
of Thing?
36
00:03:37,854 --> 00:03:40,243
Well, he has been a bit stubborn of late.
37
00:03:41,147 --> 00:03:43,980
Can you imagine not wanting
to play fast draw with the children?
38
00:03:44,189 --> 00:03:47,579
Well, would you if you couldn't say "bang"
and win once in a while?
39
00:03:49,940 --> 00:03:53,012
- Lunch.
- Oh, thank you, Lurch.
40
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:56,908
And it's so nice
that you're your same sweet, lovable self.
41
00:04:01,318 --> 00:04:05,152
Thing, Lurch has announced lunch.
You may ring.
42
00:04:07,444 --> 00:04:08,559
Thing!
43
00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:13,039
Oh, he's really in a mood. I'll ring.
44
00:04:25,948 --> 00:04:27,097
Thing...
45
00:04:30,658 --> 00:04:33,855
All right, Mr. Fingers, you asked for it.
46
00:04:56,955 --> 00:04:58,070
You know, Tish,
47
00:04:58,205 --> 00:05:00,719
there are some times I wish your name
were something like "Oo-oo."
48
00:05:01,706 --> 00:05:02,741
"Oo-oo?"
49
00:05:03,915 --> 00:05:07,828
It's almost impossible to blow
smoke rings and spell out "Morticia."
50
00:05:08,583 --> 00:05:10,938
Well, darling, it's the thought that counts.
51
00:05:11,125 --> 00:05:13,400
Lurch certainly outdid himself
with that lunch.
52
00:05:13,584 --> 00:05:15,779
Marinated gizzard of lizard.
53
00:05:15,959 --> 00:05:17,108
En crouton.
54
00:05:19,043 --> 00:05:22,160
Still, it wasn't the same
without Thing at the table.
55
00:05:23,128 --> 00:05:25,722
He's so handy for passing.
56
00:05:25,920 --> 00:05:27,831
And fanning hot soup.
57
00:05:28,004 --> 00:05:30,757
Oh, darling, do you remember the time
he spilt the salt
58
00:05:30,963 --> 00:05:34,842
and he almost went mad
trying to find a shoulder to throw it over?
59
00:05:35,964 --> 00:05:36,999
Now.
60
00:05:40,548 --> 00:05:43,824
It's odd. The one in the middle
always comes out that way.
61
00:05:44,049 --> 00:05:47,007
- A spare leg could come in handy.
- That's true.
62
00:05:48,633 --> 00:05:51,147
Oh, I see my roses need trimming again.
63
00:05:51,342 --> 00:05:54,891
No matter what I do
those smelly petals keep growing back.
64
00:05:59,761 --> 00:06:02,070
Hand me my shears, please, Thing.
65
00:06:03,636 --> 00:06:06,469
Thank you, Thing,
I knew you'd come around.
66
00:06:06,679 --> 00:06:07,953
Thing!
67
00:06:08,096 --> 00:06:11,327
- Oh, darling, I thought it was...
- Nonsense.
68
00:06:11,555 --> 00:06:13,750
Thing only likes to hold hands.
69
00:06:13,930 --> 00:06:16,922
You know, dear,
I'm getting very concerned about him.
70
00:06:17,139 --> 00:06:19,050
I think we ought to find out
what his trouble is.
71
00:06:19,223 --> 00:06:20,656
Capital idea.
72
00:06:23,557 --> 00:06:24,672
Thing?
73
00:06:26,183 --> 00:06:28,981
Come on, Thing,
I want to have a man-to-hand talk.
74
00:06:31,976 --> 00:06:33,091
Thing?
75
00:06:36,019 --> 00:06:37,134
Thing?
76
00:06:45,104 --> 00:06:48,574
- Sounds empty.
- I'm going to get to the bottom of this.
77
00:06:48,813 --> 00:06:50,849
If there is a bottom to it.
78
00:06:55,106 --> 00:06:56,221
Thing.
79
00:07:02,649 --> 00:07:03,764
Thing?
80
00:07:07,442 --> 00:07:08,557
Thing.
81
00:07:22,737 --> 00:07:25,535
Haven't seen Thing around, have you?
82
00:07:25,738 --> 00:07:27,217
I thought not.
83
00:07:28,988 --> 00:07:30,307
Find any clues?
84
00:07:30,447 --> 00:07:33,484
No, dear, but I found this
in one of Thing's favorite boxes.
85
00:07:34,531 --> 00:07:37,728
Thing's parents.
Probably their wedding picture.
86
00:07:37,949 --> 00:07:40,383
- Lovely couple.
- Yes.
87
00:07:40,574 --> 00:07:43,213
Darling, doesn't it strike you as odd
that Thing would go away
88
00:07:43,408 --> 00:07:45,717
- and leave a treasure like this behind?
- Yes.
89
00:07:45,909 --> 00:07:47,342
I mean, he just wouldn't pack up and...
90
00:07:49,326 --> 00:07:52,363
Darling, do you suppose
Thing has met with foul play?
91
00:07:52,577 --> 00:07:54,693
- Exactly my thoughts, querida.
- What are we going to do?
92
00:07:54,869 --> 00:07:57,941
The only thing we can do with a mystery.
Solve it.
93
00:08:01,621 --> 00:08:04,419
I shall conduct
an investigation immediately.
94
00:08:05,330 --> 00:08:06,729
Fingerprints!
95
00:08:08,414 --> 00:08:09,563
My own.
96
00:08:11,248 --> 00:08:12,522
Where were you on the night of March 3?
97
00:08:12,665 --> 00:08:15,702
- Gomez!
- Sorry, my pet, I tend to get carried away.
98
00:08:15,915 --> 00:08:17,985
But we do have to chercher la femme.
99
00:08:20,208 --> 00:08:23,245
Tish, you know what you do
when you speak French to me.
100
00:08:23,459 --> 00:08:26,053
Darling,
please remember you're on a case.
101
00:08:26,251 --> 00:08:27,923
That's right. A case.
102
00:08:28,668 --> 00:08:30,260
Now, what was that
about chercher la femme?
103
00:08:30,419 --> 00:08:33,013
An old saying I just made up.
"Find the woman."
104
00:08:33,211 --> 00:08:36,009
Oh, very clever. Then you do suspect me.
105
00:08:36,212 --> 00:08:39,682
No, my dear.
The other femme in our house.
106
00:08:39,921 --> 00:08:41,798
The mischievous, petite femme.
107
00:08:42,755 --> 00:08:44,313
Wednesday Addams.
108
00:08:46,130 --> 00:08:48,280
I won't talk without a lawyer.
109
00:08:52,090 --> 00:08:55,002
She's a shrewd one.
But the psychological effect of the hose
110
00:08:55,216 --> 00:08:56,968
makes them all crack.
111
00:08:58,300 --> 00:09:00,689
- How about you?
- I claim the Fifth Amendment.
112
00:09:04,426 --> 00:09:08,339
- What's the Fifth Amendment?
- Darling, you went to law school.
113
00:09:08,594 --> 00:09:10,346
I was absent that day.
114
00:09:13,886 --> 00:09:15,604
Hey, everybody. What's going on?
115
00:09:15,762 --> 00:09:18,720
Fester, I'm right in the middle
of a very important interrogation.
116
00:09:18,929 --> 00:09:20,760
So that's what happened to the hose.
117
00:09:20,930 --> 00:09:23,603
Don't you know that the whole cellar's
leaking all over the place?
118
00:09:23,805 --> 00:09:25,602
- Well, we found out one thing.
- What's that?
119
00:09:25,764 --> 00:09:26,913
We need a plumber.
120
00:09:27,056 --> 00:09:30,093
- I'll fix it.
- I'll help you.
121
00:09:30,307 --> 00:09:32,980
But I haven't finished
my interrogation yet.
122
00:09:33,182 --> 00:09:36,094
- Interrogation? Whose?
- Yours.
123
00:09:38,559 --> 00:09:42,313
Well, Thing and I had a slight brush.
124
00:09:43,393 --> 00:09:44,985
Is this what you call the third degree?
125
00:09:45,352 --> 00:09:47,661
- Is it getting to you?
- Oh, yeah.
126
00:09:47,852 --> 00:09:49,683
Say, you can take it up
to the fourth degree.
127
00:09:50,936 --> 00:09:54,087
Uncle Fester, please,
you're not cooperating at all.
128
00:09:55,104 --> 00:09:56,503
What is it you wanna know?
129
00:09:56,646 --> 00:09:58,716
We want to know what happened to Thing.
130
00:09:59,188 --> 00:10:01,418
Well, why didn't you say so?
131
00:10:01,605 --> 00:10:02,754
Thing's disappeared.
132
00:10:02,897 --> 00:10:04,296
We know that.
133
00:10:04,439 --> 00:10:06,475
We want to know
if Thing met with foul play.
134
00:10:07,732 --> 00:10:10,166
Well, the way
Fingers has been acting lately,
135
00:10:10,357 --> 00:10:11,949
I'd call it fair play.
136
00:10:12,108 --> 00:10:14,986
Uncle Fester, how can you be so callous?
137
00:10:15,192 --> 00:10:17,069
I've been practicing.
138
00:10:17,234 --> 00:10:18,713
That does help.
139
00:10:18,859 --> 00:10:21,134
Say, why don't you question Mama?
140
00:10:21,651 --> 00:10:24,529
She and Thing had a terrible fight
in the kitchen.
141
00:10:25,277 --> 00:10:26,505
They did?
142
00:10:28,236 --> 00:10:29,271
Mama.
143
00:10:30,028 --> 00:10:33,737
Thing ruined my blackbird pie,
that's what he did.
144
00:10:33,987 --> 00:10:36,342
- Let them get away.
- Let who get away?
145
00:10:36,530 --> 00:10:39,328
The blackbirds.
All four and twenty of them.
146
00:10:40,114 --> 00:10:42,753
Insisted on helping Lurch pour the tea.
147
00:10:45,448 --> 00:10:48,326
- Lurch.
- Of course. Lurch!
148
00:10:48,532 --> 00:10:49,726
It's always the butler.
149
00:10:53,117 --> 00:10:56,154
Lurch, I'll thank you
to wipe that smile off your face.
150
00:10:56,367 --> 00:10:58,278
You seem pleased that Thing is gone.
151
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:01,487
Thing gone?
152
00:11:02,785 --> 00:11:04,582
Well, I guess we're right back
where we started.
153
00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:08,633
Sorry, old man.
154
00:11:09,453 --> 00:11:12,650
- Darling, why don't we call the police?
- The police?
155
00:11:13,788 --> 00:11:17,781
Well, I suppose so.
Just to handle the details.
156
00:11:18,039 --> 00:11:19,995
Of course, bubele.
157
00:11:21,164 --> 00:11:23,724
Tish, that word.
158
00:11:23,915 --> 00:11:26,383
Darling, remember you're on a case.
159
00:11:28,166 --> 00:11:30,680
You're right, a case.
160
00:11:37,835 --> 00:11:41,145
Operator? Please connect me
with the police department.
161
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:44,140
Well, of course it is.
162
00:11:44,294 --> 00:11:48,606
If your family Thing was missing,
wouldn't you consider that an emergency?
163
00:11:50,837 --> 00:11:54,034
Hello, Police Department?
This is Mrs. Addams.
164
00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:56,644
I'd like to report a missing Thing.
165
00:11:57,422 --> 00:11:59,413
What? Just a moment.
166
00:12:00,631 --> 00:12:04,863
Darling, shall I ask for the
Burglary Division or Missing Persons?
167
00:12:05,924 --> 00:12:09,314
Well, that is a moot point.
Find out if they have a Miscellaneous.
168
00:12:11,134 --> 00:12:15,127
But if it isn't a person, just what sort of
a thing is it that's missing, Mrs. Addams?
169
00:12:15,385 --> 00:12:16,454
Is it a pet?
170
00:12:16,843 --> 00:12:19,721
Well, it's a family retainer.
171
00:12:19,927 --> 00:12:24,045
Oh, so it's a servant.
Well, isn't that a person?
172
00:12:24,303 --> 00:12:25,577
Not necessarily.
173
00:12:25,720 --> 00:12:29,030
"Not..."
Well, have you got a picture of him?
174
00:12:29,263 --> 00:12:31,413
Yes, I believe we do. Just a moment.
175
00:12:31,596 --> 00:12:34,156
Darling, is that family portrait still around?
176
00:12:34,347 --> 00:12:37,066
Yes, but I'm afraid Thing isn't in it.
Don't you remember?
177
00:12:37,264 --> 00:12:38,697
He took the picture.
178
00:12:39,181 --> 00:12:44,050
Look, lady, unless you can give me
something more specific to go on,
179
00:12:44,349 --> 00:12:46,909
I'm sorry, but we can't be any help to you.
180
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:50,490
Who cares?
Run an ad in the Lost and Found.
181
00:13:03,728 --> 00:13:06,959
I found it in a vacant lot.
When I saw your ad...
182
00:13:07,188 --> 00:13:09,907
Oh, it's exquisite, but it's not our Thing.
183
00:13:10,522 --> 00:13:12,478
Think you could bear to part with it?
184
00:13:12,647 --> 00:13:14,444
- You mean you still want it?
- Oh, yes.
185
00:13:14,606 --> 00:13:16,164
Name your price.
186
00:13:17,898 --> 00:13:20,287
- $2.50?
- $250?
187
00:13:20,482 --> 00:13:23,280
- No, I meant...
- Too late! It's a deal.
188
00:13:23,483 --> 00:13:26,475
You'll have to excuse my husband.
He drives a very hard bargain.
189
00:13:26,692 --> 00:13:28,250
Business is business.
190
00:13:28,401 --> 00:13:30,551
Can't have you upping the price on us,
old man.
191
00:13:30,734 --> 00:13:33,567
No, no, of course not.
Thanks, thanks a lot.
192
00:13:34,318 --> 00:13:36,354
I'm on my way down to the dump now,
193
00:13:36,527 --> 00:13:39,599
and if I find any other bargains
I'll let you know.
194
00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:41,139
You do that.
195
00:13:42,487 --> 00:13:45,524
Oh, we'll be days
finding just the right spot
196
00:13:45,738 --> 00:13:47,694
for all these beautiful things.
197
00:13:47,863 --> 00:13:50,616
Certainly got a wonderful response
to our ad.
198
00:13:50,822 --> 00:13:54,019
I'd give them all up for just one look
at our Thing.
199
00:13:55,198 --> 00:13:56,790
This may be it.
200
00:13:56,948 --> 00:13:59,223
I certainly hope so.
We're running out of room.
201
00:14:03,158 --> 00:14:05,592
- Special delivery.
- Thank you, Lurch.
202
00:14:09,826 --> 00:14:12,260
Morticia, it's a ransom note.
203
00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:15,569
- A ransom note? You mean...
- He's been Thingnapped!
204
00:14:17,745 --> 00:14:21,055
"The ransom is to be paid
at the stroke of midnight,
205
00:14:21,287 --> 00:14:25,405
"and do not call the law if you expect
to get Thing back in one piece."
206
00:14:25,663 --> 00:14:28,575
- Oh, Gomez!
- Courage, my dear, courage.
207
00:14:28,789 --> 00:14:32,577
"Ransom is to be paid
by a disinterested party."
208
00:14:32,831 --> 00:14:35,823
I know just the one.
That famous private detective.
209
00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:37,075
What's his name?
210
00:14:37,207 --> 00:14:39,482
- The one who always wears a trench coat?
- Naturally.
211
00:14:39,666 --> 00:14:42,738
- And a snap-brim hat?
- Yes, it's... It's Sam, Sam!
212
00:14:43,792 --> 00:14:44,827
It's a figure on a card.
213
00:14:44,959 --> 00:14:46,392
- Sam Heart?
- No, no.
214
00:14:46,543 --> 00:14:47,942
- Sam Club?
- No.
215
00:14:48,085 --> 00:14:49,962
- Sam Diamond?
- That's it!
216
00:15:04,255 --> 00:15:06,052
I'm Sam Diamond.
217
00:15:08,964 --> 00:15:10,955
Mr. Addams?
218
00:15:11,131 --> 00:15:13,645
No, follow me.
219
00:15:21,259 --> 00:15:23,011
Mr. Sam Diamond.
220
00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:28,561
How do you do, Mr. Diamond?
221
00:15:28,719 --> 00:15:32,029
I'm Mr. Addams
and this is my lovely wife, Morticia.
222
00:15:32,261 --> 00:15:35,571
- How do you do?
- Just make yourself at home.
223
00:15:35,803 --> 00:15:36,838
Home?
224
00:15:39,596 --> 00:15:41,427
Look, if this is some kind of a shady deal,
forget it.
225
00:15:41,596 --> 00:15:43,666
Nonsense. We're the victims.
226
00:15:48,765 --> 00:15:51,484
- Who was it that got snatched?
- Thing.
227
00:15:51,682 --> 00:15:52,751
Thing?
228
00:15:55,516 --> 00:15:57,746
- What was his last name?
- Thing.
229
00:15:59,725 --> 00:16:01,044
Thing Thing?
230
00:16:02,893 --> 00:16:04,485
What kind of a name is that?
231
00:16:04,643 --> 00:16:06,793
- It fits him perfectly.
- That's true.
232
00:16:06,977 --> 00:16:09,172
Signs himself, "Thing T. Thing."
233
00:16:10,436 --> 00:16:12,745
And the "T" stands for...
234
00:16:12,937 --> 00:16:14,006
- Thing.
- Thing.
235
00:16:16,812 --> 00:16:19,770
Look, folks, kidnapping is a little bit
out of my line.
236
00:16:19,980 --> 00:16:21,618
So if you'll excuse me...
237
00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:23,922
Gomez, I do believe he's our man.
238
00:16:24,106 --> 00:16:26,415
The ransom note said
"a disinterested party."
239
00:16:26,606 --> 00:16:29,439
- He seems very disinterested.
- Exactly.
240
00:16:29,649 --> 00:16:31,367
I'll weigh up the ransom.
241
00:16:33,191 --> 00:16:36,308
- Weigh up the ransom?
- Oh, just a few precious stones.
242
00:16:36,525 --> 00:16:40,120
Thing is worth his weight in them,
even with his thumb on the scale.
243
00:16:40,359 --> 00:16:42,190
We'll pay your fee with them,
if you don't mind.
244
00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:45,158
Oh, I'm sure Mr. Diamond
won't mind diamonds.
245
00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:48,830
No, no, no, it goes with the name.
246
00:16:49,069 --> 00:16:50,707
Did somebody mention diamond?
247
00:16:51,612 --> 00:16:52,761
What is that?
248
00:16:52,904 --> 00:16:55,976
That's Uncle Fester. We need him
to open the safe for the ransom.
249
00:16:56,946 --> 00:16:58,299
Mr. Diamond.
250
00:16:59,072 --> 00:17:00,471
Well, let's get at it.
251
00:17:07,782 --> 00:17:09,773
You mean you don't know
the combination to your own safe?
252
00:17:09,949 --> 00:17:12,782
Of course. Uncle Fester enjoys cracking it.
253
00:17:12,991 --> 00:17:15,710
It turns a mundane task into an adventure.
254
00:17:16,909 --> 00:17:19,981
You know, Gomez, you're gonna have
to change the combination on that safe.
255
00:17:20,201 --> 00:17:21,395
It's getting too easy.
256
00:17:21,535 --> 00:17:23,810
I think next time
I'll have it wired with nitro.
257
00:17:23,994 --> 00:17:25,871
Oh, boy, I'll get a bang out of that!
258
00:17:28,203 --> 00:17:30,558
Well, let's see what we have here.
259
00:17:33,079 --> 00:17:35,115
Well, I wondered what I'd done with that.
260
00:17:42,081 --> 00:17:45,596
Oh, darling, this bomb won't go off
for another six months yet.
261
00:17:45,832 --> 00:17:48,949
I wish you wouldn't set them
so far in advance. We tend to lose interest.
262
00:17:50,958 --> 00:17:52,357
Here we are.
263
00:17:53,250 --> 00:17:54,842
A few samples from our diamond mine.
264
00:17:55,001 --> 00:17:57,993
All of our really fine stones
are cursed, of course.
265
00:17:58,210 --> 00:18:00,599
Been in the Addams family
for generations.
266
00:18:00,794 --> 00:18:02,989
All right, you're putting me on
with the rocks, aren't you?
267
00:18:03,169 --> 00:18:05,285
I mean, they couldn't possibly be real.
268
00:18:05,670 --> 00:18:08,821
- Au contraire.
- Tish, there you go with that French again.
269
00:18:09,045 --> 00:18:10,763
I've warned you,
I'm not responsible for my actions
270
00:18:10,921 --> 00:18:12,320
when you talk that way.
271
00:18:14,713 --> 00:18:17,102
Darling, please, we have a visitor.
272
00:18:18,589 --> 00:18:20,147
Later.
273
00:18:20,298 --> 00:18:22,095
Now, what's on your mind?
274
00:18:22,257 --> 00:18:24,134
I'm not sure.
275
00:18:24,299 --> 00:18:27,575
You did say
you were going to pay my fee in gems.
276
00:18:27,799 --> 00:18:30,916
Oh, yes. Only too happy to unload a few.
277
00:18:31,134 --> 00:18:32,567
Now let's see.
278
00:18:34,759 --> 00:18:39,753
$8,402!
279
00:18:40,177 --> 00:18:41,974
I trust that's a satisfactory fee.
280
00:18:42,136 --> 00:18:44,411
Oh, sure, that'll be fine.
281
00:18:44,595 --> 00:18:48,474
- Now, what do I have to do?
- Simply follow instructions.
282
00:18:52,930 --> 00:18:55,080
"The cemetery at midnight"?
283
00:18:58,014 --> 00:19:00,448
What could happen to me there?
Don't answer that.
284
00:19:02,307 --> 00:19:03,626
I'll do it.
285
00:19:07,266 --> 00:19:10,099
Certainly inspires confidence, doesn't he?
286
00:19:10,309 --> 00:19:13,984
I thought all the dash and daring
of those private detectives in the movies
287
00:19:14,226 --> 00:19:15,739
was an exaggeration.
288
00:19:16,227 --> 00:19:20,937
Cara mia, don't be so naive.
The cinema is a reflection of life.
289
00:19:21,228 --> 00:19:26,302
Men like Sam Diamond are forceful,
fearless and absolutely infallible.
290
00:19:37,523 --> 00:19:39,559
Diamond, old man! Back so soon?
291
00:19:39,732 --> 00:19:41,245
Thought you'd tarry
to enjoy the moonlight.
292
00:19:41,399 --> 00:19:43,435
We usually do
when we visit the cemetery.
293
00:19:43,608 --> 00:19:46,406
Dear Gomez, he's such a romantic.
294
00:19:46,608 --> 00:19:49,759
But where's Thing?
Didn't you deliver the ransom?
295
00:19:49,984 --> 00:19:53,693
- As directed?
- You put it on the last grave?
296
00:19:53,943 --> 00:19:58,971
And then suddenly, a hand, just a hand,
297
00:19:59,278 --> 00:20:01,234
reached up and snatched it away.
298
00:20:01,403 --> 00:20:03,200
A hand?
299
00:20:03,362 --> 00:20:07,674
I knew you wouldn't believe me,
but it was a hand. A hand.
300
00:20:07,946 --> 00:20:11,222
- But we do believe you, old boy.
- And it's wonderful.
301
00:20:12,406 --> 00:20:15,045
- Wonderful?
- You made contact with Thing!
302
00:20:16,073 --> 00:20:19,463
You mean that was Thing?
303
00:20:20,199 --> 00:20:23,077
Dear, sweet, wonderful Thing.
304
00:20:24,367 --> 00:20:25,720
Oh, here.
305
00:20:27,117 --> 00:20:31,076
You take the fee.
Just let me get out of here.
306
00:20:34,327 --> 00:20:38,036
Very sporting of him, wasn't it?
Handling the case for nothing.
307
00:20:38,286 --> 00:20:40,242
I think we ought to send him
a nice present.
308
00:20:40,412 --> 00:20:44,041
Yes.
One of your man-eating plants, perhaps.
309
00:20:44,288 --> 00:20:46,438
The practical gifts are best.
310
00:20:46,622 --> 00:20:48,977
- Well, Thing ought to be along soon.
- Yes.
311
00:20:57,249 --> 00:21:00,207
Oh, Thing, I'm so glad you're home.
312
00:21:00,416 --> 00:21:05,012
Wait a minute.
Morticia, this whole thing is a hoax.
313
00:21:05,292 --> 00:21:06,611
What?
314
00:21:06,751 --> 00:21:10,346
You sent us that ransom note yourself,
didn't you, Thing?
315
00:21:12,169 --> 00:21:16,242
- I thought the handwriting was familiar.
- What's the big idea, Thing?
316
00:21:23,380 --> 00:21:24,733
Neglected...
317
00:21:26,130 --> 00:21:27,529
Test us...
318
00:21:28,464 --> 00:21:30,739
Wanted to see
319
00:21:30,923 --> 00:21:35,758
if we cared enough
320
00:21:37,049 --> 00:21:41,725
to ransom him back.
321
00:21:43,092 --> 00:21:44,571
Well, you got your answer.
322
00:21:44,718 --> 00:21:48,552
And Sam Diamond liked you so much
he wouldn't even accept a fee.
323
00:21:49,552 --> 00:21:51,782
Some Things get a little spoiled.
324
00:21:52,594 --> 00:21:55,666
Well, darling,
we have been neglecting him of late.
325
00:21:55,887 --> 00:21:58,082
Perhaps we should take him out.
326
00:21:59,054 --> 00:22:02,012
Thing loves music.
Let's take him to a concert.
327
00:22:02,221 --> 00:22:05,133
Splendid.
He can rattle along on his castanets.
328
00:22:05,972 --> 00:22:08,202
I'll call Lurch
and have him get the car ready.
329
00:22:13,974 --> 00:22:16,249
- You rang?
- The car, Lurch.
330
00:22:16,433 --> 00:22:19,869
And, oh, Lurch, we have a surprise for you.
331
00:22:29,436 --> 00:22:31,950
Aren't you going to let Thing know
that you're glad he's back?
332
00:22:36,312 --> 00:22:39,941
There, Thing. That should
make you feel right at home again.
333
00:22:56,233 --> 00:22:57,382
Thing.
334
00:22:58,150 --> 00:22:59,549
Thing.
335
00:22:59,692 --> 00:23:02,923
I brought you a little present
just to show you there's no hard feelings.
336
00:23:03,151 --> 00:23:04,470
A nail file.
337
00:23:21,572 --> 00:23:22,766
For you.
338
00:23:36,284 --> 00:23:37,603
Hey, Fingers,
339
00:23:37,742 --> 00:23:40,461
just a little something to show you
that I don't hold grudges.
340
00:23:49,662 --> 00:23:51,698
Gee, I was a beautiful baby.
341
00:23:58,414 --> 00:24:01,645
- Where are you going, to a masquerade?
- To a concert.
342
00:24:01,873 --> 00:24:03,829
Boy, you sure look ridiculous.
343
00:24:03,998 --> 00:24:07,991
Fester, it's plain to see
you have no sartorial savoir-faire.
344
00:24:08,541 --> 00:24:09,610
I resent that.
345
00:24:09,749 --> 00:24:13,981
Uncle Fester, now, dear,
we haven't got time for that right now.
346
00:24:14,250 --> 00:24:16,286
Thing, we're ready.
347
00:24:25,503 --> 00:24:27,539
Oh, dear Thing.
348
00:24:27,712 --> 00:24:30,829
Now, Thing has sartorial savoir-faire.
349
00:24:31,046 --> 00:24:34,004
I'm glad, 'cause he sure dresses funny.
350
00:24:35,463 --> 00:24:37,374
Well, querida, we're off.
351
00:24:39,839 --> 00:24:44,230
- Tish, where will Thing ride?
- Darling, where he always rides.
352
00:24:44,507 --> 00:24:45,781
In the glove compartment.
353
00:24:46,781 --> 00:24:56,781
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