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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:56,681 --> 00:00:57,806 Patrick. 2 00:00:57,807 --> 00:00:58,974 Adeline. 3 00:00:58,975 --> 00:01:02,770 This is going to be the best Valentine's Day ever. 4 00:01:03,479 --> 00:01:04,480 This place... 5 00:01:06,399 --> 00:01:07,817 it's just so gorge. 6 00:01:08,442 --> 00:01:09,818 Of course it is, babe. 7 00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:11,237 - You picked it! - I picked it! 8 00:01:18,286 --> 00:01:19,287 Oh. 9 00:01:19,495 --> 00:01:21,914 Mmm. Mmm. 10 00:01:23,124 --> 00:01:24,292 Mmm. 11 00:01:25,793 --> 00:01:26,794 Mmm? 12 00:01:30,214 --> 00:01:31,215 What the hell? 13 00:01:35,803 --> 00:01:38,054 I told you not to put it in my food. 14 00:01:38,055 --> 00:01:41,392 - Oh, shit. I'm sorry. Sorry, I-- - It's fine. Keep going. 15 00:01:46,522 --> 00:01:47,939 Adeline Delilah Garrett. 16 00:01:47,940 --> 00:01:49,566 You're smart. 17 00:01:49,567 --> 00:01:50,775 You're beautiful. 18 00:01:50,776 --> 00:01:53,195 And perhaps most important of all, 19 00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:54,739 you make me think. 20 00:01:55,865 --> 00:01:59,159 You're my person and I can't imagine my life without you. 21 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,453 Will you marry me? 22 00:02:01,245 --> 00:02:03,706 Yes. A million times, yes! 23 00:02:24,268 --> 00:02:26,437 Why are you calling me right now? 24 00:02:27,688 --> 00:02:28,855 I didn't get it. 25 00:02:28,856 --> 00:02:31,024 What the fuck do you mean you didn't get it? 26 00:02:31,025 --> 00:02:32,317 Yeah, I'm sorry, dude. 27 00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:34,361 There was a couple of sun flares and like... 28 00:02:34,362 --> 00:02:36,530 Um, could you maybe do it again? Or... 29 00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:37,864 Why, yes. 30 00:02:37,865 --> 00:02:39,950 Let me re-propose to my fucking girlfriend 31 00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:41,452 so you can do your job right. 32 00:02:42,703 --> 00:02:45,455 - Technically she's your fiancée. - Don't get cute with me. 33 00:02:45,456 --> 00:02:48,835 Do it right this time or I'll fucking end you... 34 00:02:49,794 --> 00:02:51,503 - on Yelp. - Okay, cool, thanks. 35 00:02:51,504 --> 00:02:54,632 I'll talk to you later. I'm not even on Yelp, dick. 36 00:02:59,804 --> 00:03:03,348 Uh... Speech, speech, speech. Lovey, lovey-dovey. 37 00:03:03,349 --> 00:03:04,433 And... 38 00:03:05,810 --> 00:03:06,893 Will you marry me? 39 00:03:06,894 --> 00:03:09,397 Yes. A million times, yes. 40 00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:16,904 Just one second. 41 00:03:20,032 --> 00:03:22,158 Give me that. Hello? 42 00:03:22,159 --> 00:03:23,910 Nico the Photo Guy. Leave a message. 43 00:03:23,911 --> 00:03:25,872 Are you fucking kidding... me? 44 00:04:03,034 --> 00:04:04,035 No! 45 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:35,483 Hello? 46 00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:41,697 You listen here, asshole. 47 00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:47,662 I have been planning this day my whole life... 48 00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:51,040 and you fucking killed him! 49 00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:54,752 You messed with the wrong bride. 50 00:04:56,170 --> 00:04:57,171 You hear me? 51 00:04:58,130 --> 00:05:00,049 You messed with the wrong fu-- 52 00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:28,785 Whoa, ma'am, you can't be here. What are you doing? 53 00:05:28,786 --> 00:05:30,955 - He's trying to kill me! - Please, just calm down. 54 00:05:33,207 --> 00:05:35,376 Hey, buddy, you wanna tell me what's going on? 55 00:05:37,545 --> 00:05:39,839 Wait. Stop! Drop the knife, asshole! 56 00:05:45,511 --> 00:05:48,472 Somebody! Please! 57 00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:18,377 Shoot. 58 00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:08,761 Take that, you motherfucker! 59 00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:10,972 Go away! 60 00:07:12,473 --> 00:07:13,558 You go away! 61 00:07:16,018 --> 00:07:17,019 You go away! 62 00:07:17,854 --> 00:07:18,855 You go away! 63 00:07:26,904 --> 00:07:27,905 No. 64 00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:31,617 No, no, no, no, no, no, no... 65 00:07:32,618 --> 00:07:34,619 No, no, no, no, no. Please! 66 00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:36,122 Hey! Hey! 67 00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:39,792 No! 68 00:07:47,383 --> 00:07:48,384 No! 69 00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:52,430 No! 70 00:07:53,222 --> 00:07:55,349 No! 71 00:08:50,780 --> 00:08:52,113 It's Valentine's Day 72 00:08:52,114 --> 00:08:54,867 and the nation is once again on high alert. 73 00:08:56,452 --> 00:08:59,120 {\an8}For the past two years, a masked maniac 74 00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:00,830 {\an8}known as the Heart Eyes Killer... 75 00:09:00,831 --> 00:09:04,334 {\an8}...or HEK, as authorities call him for short, 76 00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:06,711 {\an8}has emerged on a day meant for romance 77 00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:09,339 {\an8}to target, hunt and brutally kill couples. 78 00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:11,967 {\an8}HEK seems to target cities at random. 79 00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:13,343 {\an8}From a blood-soaked rampage 80 00:09:13,344 --> 00:09:14,928 {\an8}in the Boston area two years ago... 81 00:09:14,929 --> 00:09:17,055 {\an8}...as well as a second killing spree, 82 00:09:17,056 --> 00:09:20,058 {\an8}which left several dead in Philadelphia just last year. 83 00:09:20,059 --> 00:09:23,061 {\an8}Even though he's after couples in love, 84 00:09:23,062 --> 00:09:25,272 {\an8}let me be perfectly clear about this... 85 00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:29,402 He will kill anyone who gets in his way. 86 00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:33,029 {\an8}...leaving Americans once again plagued with anxiety 87 00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:35,115 {\an8}on Cupid's holiday asking the question... 88 00:09:35,116 --> 00:09:38,202 {\an8}Where will the Heart Eyes Killer strike next? 89 00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:44,416 {\an8}Do you expect the Heart Eyes Killer 90 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,501 {\an8}to kill your Valentine's Day plans? 91 00:09:46,502 --> 00:09:48,795 {\an8}Who the hell makes Valentine's Day plans? 92 00:09:48,796 --> 00:09:50,505 {\an8}Yeah, this holiday sucks ass, dude. 93 00:09:50,506 --> 00:09:52,048 {\an8}- Literally. - Fuck Valentine... 94 00:09:52,049 --> 00:09:53,717 {\an8}I ain't even low-key scared. 95 00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:56,178 {\an8}The HEK ain't got nothin' on me. You know, 'cause I-- 96 00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:58,139 {\an8}Shut up, Dylan. You're afraid of the dark. 97 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,350 {\an8}No, I don't. 98 00:10:04,352 --> 00:10:06,520 - The Heart Eyes Killer-- - So glad I'm single. 99 00:10:06,521 --> 00:10:08,606 - I'm gonna celebrate inside. - That dude hunts you. 100 00:10:08,607 --> 00:10:11,192 ...rubbing your shitty PDA all up in our face-- 101 00:10:11,193 --> 00:10:12,484 He only kills straight people, I think. 102 00:10:12,485 --> 00:10:15,529 Whether you're with a partner or looking for love, 103 00:10:15,530 --> 00:10:18,241 stay vigilant this Valentine's Day. 104 00:10:38,553 --> 00:10:39,554 Shit! 105 00:10:42,724 --> 00:10:44,808 - Nice one, dipshits. - Got a cappuccino here. 106 00:10:44,809 --> 00:10:46,936 Hope Cupid shoots you in the dick. 107 00:10:46,937 --> 00:10:48,812 Caramel soy latte for Monica! 108 00:10:48,813 --> 00:10:50,982 - Oh, that's me. - Okay, yeah. There. 109 00:10:52,984 --> 00:10:54,401 Why do you look so stressed? 110 00:10:54,402 --> 00:10:56,654 Is it 'cause you're single again on Valentine's Day? 111 00:10:56,655 --> 00:10:59,573 No, I'm... I'm stressed because Crystal just called 112 00:10:59,574 --> 00:11:01,659 an all-hands meeting and the subject of her email 113 00:11:01,660 --> 00:11:03,202 literally says "Ally's Campaign." 114 00:11:03,203 --> 00:11:04,620 - Hmm. I saw that. - So, I'm fucked. 115 00:11:04,621 --> 00:11:06,288 Okay, worst-case scenario, 116 00:11:06,289 --> 00:11:09,166 you get fired and you never work another day in your life. 117 00:11:09,167 --> 00:11:12,127 Worst-case scenario, Crystal wears my skin as a pantsuit. 118 00:11:12,128 --> 00:11:14,380 Best-case scenario, you got nice skin though. 119 00:11:14,381 --> 00:11:15,506 Boop. 120 00:11:15,507 --> 00:11:17,007 You know what? Whatever. 121 00:11:17,008 --> 00:11:19,134 If you go down, I'll go down with you. Okay? 122 00:11:19,135 --> 00:11:20,553 We'll Thelma and Louise this shit. 123 00:11:20,554 --> 00:11:22,054 Large iced blended Americano 124 00:11:22,055 --> 00:11:24,599 with oat milk, two honey, one sugar. 125 00:11:26,810 --> 00:11:28,435 Sorry, are you sure that's yours? 126 00:11:28,436 --> 00:11:31,480 Yes, that is definitely mine. 127 00:11:31,481 --> 00:11:34,358 No one else would order a large iced blended Americano 128 00:11:34,359 --> 00:11:36,986 with oat milk, two honey, one sugar. 129 00:11:36,987 --> 00:11:39,489 Sugar. Yeah. Look at that. Wow. 130 00:11:40,365 --> 00:11:41,908 Guess we're coffee mates. 131 00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:45,202 - Nice dad joke. - Thanks. 132 00:11:45,203 --> 00:11:46,662 I thought I was the only one in the world 133 00:11:46,663 --> 00:11:48,414 with the most obnoxious coffee order. 134 00:11:48,415 --> 00:11:50,040 It's a pretty common order actually. 135 00:11:50,041 --> 00:11:51,459 Can you guys move? We're busy. 136 00:11:52,252 --> 00:11:53,253 Yes. 137 00:11:54,671 --> 00:11:55,672 He's hot! 138 00:11:59,509 --> 00:12:01,886 Hey, can I interest you in one of these guys? 139 00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:04,346 Oh, no, I'm okay. Thanks. I carry my own. 140 00:12:04,347 --> 00:12:06,807 - Oh. Metal straw. - I hate paper straws. 141 00:12:06,808 --> 00:12:09,185 They just turn into mush in, like, three seconds. 142 00:12:09,186 --> 00:12:11,854 Yeah, no. I totally get what you're saying. 143 00:12:11,855 --> 00:12:14,064 Let's put all the coffee in a plastic cup, 144 00:12:14,065 --> 00:12:16,942 but, hey, as long as the straw is paper, planet saved. 145 00:12:16,943 --> 00:12:18,819 Planet saved. 146 00:12:18,820 --> 00:12:21,780 - Uh, sugar though. Want one? - Yeah. 147 00:12:21,781 --> 00:12:22,865 A little slow poison 148 00:12:22,866 --> 00:12:23,949 - for the pancreas. Oh. - Oh. 149 00:12:23,950 --> 00:12:25,534 - Ooh! - Oh! 150 00:12:25,535 --> 00:12:28,495 - I'm sorry. No, I'm-- - I'm sorry. No, I'm-- Sorry. 151 00:12:28,496 --> 00:12:31,081 - I got it. It's okay. - No, it's totally-- 152 00:12:31,082 --> 00:12:32,625 - Fucking Jesus Murphy! - Oh, Shit! 153 00:12:32,626 --> 00:12:33,792 Oh, my God. Are you okay? 154 00:12:33,793 --> 00:12:36,045 - Yeah. Am I? - Oh, my God. You're bleeding! 155 00:12:36,046 --> 00:12:38,506 - Here. Shit. Uh-- - Oh-- Thank you for that. 156 00:12:38,507 --> 00:12:40,966 Bye. Um, I'm gonna go. I'll see you at work, Mon. 157 00:12:40,967 --> 00:12:42,677 Sorry. She's getting fired today. 158 00:12:43,553 --> 00:12:46,555 Exactly one year after a Valentine's Day massacre 159 00:12:46,556 --> 00:12:49,141 left three couples dead in Boston 160 00:12:49,142 --> 00:12:51,393 and four couples dead in Philadelphia, 161 00:12:51,394 --> 00:12:54,356 the Heart Eyes Killer has come to Seattle. 162 00:12:54,481 --> 00:12:57,233 Four victims have now been claimed at a winery, 163 00:12:57,234 --> 00:12:59,569 ending one dream engagement 164 00:13:00,654 --> 00:13:01,862 in a nightmare. 165 00:13:01,863 --> 00:13:04,657 {\an8}Chief Hartley, is this the work of the Heart Eyes Killer? 166 00:13:04,658 --> 00:13:06,367 {\an8}That's not confirmed at this point, 167 00:13:06,368 --> 00:13:08,410 {\an8}but given the pattern of targeting couples 168 00:13:08,411 --> 00:13:11,038 {\an8}on Valentine's Day, we suspect it's the work of HEK. 169 00:13:11,039 --> 00:13:13,123 {\an8}What do you have to say to all those couples out there 170 00:13:13,124 --> 00:13:15,418 {\an8}planning to celebrate Valentine's Day? 171 00:13:16,211 --> 00:13:17,212 {\an8}Stay home. 172 00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:19,881 {\an8}Well. 173 00:13:22,509 --> 00:13:23,927 This is quite a pickle. 174 00:13:29,474 --> 00:13:33,435 Why didn't a single one of you 175 00:13:33,436 --> 00:13:36,605 tell me that there is a maniac 176 00:13:36,606 --> 00:13:39,108 running around slaughtering people 177 00:13:39,109 --> 00:13:42,444 on Valentine's Day these last couple years? 178 00:13:42,445 --> 00:13:43,863 Tommy? 179 00:13:43,864 --> 00:13:47,867 Not a single one of you. 180 00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:51,120 This campaign is certainly ill-timed. 181 00:13:51,121 --> 00:13:52,831 Wouldn't you say so, missy? 182 00:13:53,874 --> 00:13:56,251 Uh... Um... 183 00:13:58,044 --> 00:13:59,712 - I mean-- - You know, Crystal, 184 00:13:59,713 --> 00:14:01,547 how you always tell us 185 00:14:01,548 --> 00:14:03,883 that relevance is really important in our pitches? 186 00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:09,263 Well, I personally believe that Ally's campaign is very "now." 187 00:14:09,264 --> 00:14:11,182 Monica, thank you so much. 188 00:14:11,183 --> 00:14:13,435 If you could do me a huge favor. Shut the fuck up. 189 00:14:15,562 --> 00:14:16,563 Tommy? 190 00:14:53,099 --> 00:14:57,269 "Wow. Profiting off the death of couples to sell rings." 191 00:14:57,270 --> 00:14:58,687 "Speechless." 192 00:14:58,688 --> 00:15:01,065 - "This is disgusting." - I'll say. 193 00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:02,900 "What did I just watch?" 194 00:15:02,901 --> 00:15:04,235 "Straight-up tacky." 195 00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:08,531 "Someone find out who made this and dox their ignorant ass." 196 00:15:08,532 --> 00:15:10,741 - I mean, it just... it goes on. - I'm sure it does. 197 00:15:10,742 --> 00:15:13,078 Ally, I'm worried about your safety. 198 00:15:15,330 --> 00:15:17,373 Gee, thanks, Tommy. 199 00:15:17,374 --> 00:15:20,209 How many people has this heart-shaped asshole killed? 200 00:15:20,210 --> 00:15:22,545 I think, like, a lot. 201 00:15:22,546 --> 00:15:23,755 A lot? 202 00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:30,177 You built a nationwide campaign around romance ending in death? 203 00:15:30,178 --> 00:15:31,720 Well, you approved it. 204 00:15:31,721 --> 00:15:33,889 Because I trusted you. 205 00:15:33,890 --> 00:15:35,850 I'm gonna need a new campaign. 206 00:15:35,851 --> 00:15:39,229 - Okay. Um, no problem. I'll-- - Jay, get in here. 207 00:15:40,355 --> 00:15:42,064 Jay? Who's Jay? 208 00:15:42,065 --> 00:15:43,733 Thank you very much. 209 00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:46,318 No way. 210 00:15:46,319 --> 00:15:48,571 That's the guy whose nose you smashed 211 00:15:48,572 --> 00:15:50,281 - in at the coffee shop. - Mon, sit down. 212 00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:52,783 Jay Simmonds, everybody. This is Jay Simmonds. 213 00:15:52,784 --> 00:15:54,326 Who is Jay Simmonds? Well, I'll tell you. 214 00:15:54,327 --> 00:15:58,122 Jay Simmonds is the former CCD of BMY New York. 215 00:15:58,123 --> 00:16:02,209 He is the youngest freelancer to win a Clio Award 216 00:16:02,210 --> 00:16:04,378 for his viral romantic campaigns. 217 00:16:04,379 --> 00:16:09,091 Everything from fancy cars to luxury chocolates. 218 00:16:09,092 --> 00:16:11,302 And, he has then earned himself 219 00:16:11,303 --> 00:16:15,055 a nice little moniker of "Consumer Cupid." 220 00:16:15,056 --> 00:16:16,724 That is Jay Simmonds, 221 00:16:16,725 --> 00:16:17,808 and I'll tell you what. 222 00:16:17,809 --> 00:16:20,436 When I realized how far up shit's creek 223 00:16:20,437 --> 00:16:22,229 Ally here had paddled us, 224 00:16:22,230 --> 00:16:24,440 I knew I needed some reinforcements. 225 00:16:24,441 --> 00:16:26,610 And thank Baby Jesus. 226 00:16:27,277 --> 00:16:29,528 Now, he's gotta leave and push off tomorrow 227 00:16:29,529 --> 00:16:32,531 and skedaddle, so he's on the clock. 228 00:16:32,532 --> 00:16:34,200 Jay. Everybody, Jay! 229 00:16:34,201 --> 00:16:36,869 Thank you for the lovely flattery, Crystal. 230 00:16:36,870 --> 00:16:38,496 I appreciate it. Um... 231 00:16:39,873 --> 00:16:41,207 Listen, as I understand it, 232 00:16:41,208 --> 00:16:43,542 we've experienced some turbulence as of late, 233 00:16:43,543 --> 00:16:47,213 but it's all about how you land the plane that matters, so... 234 00:16:47,214 --> 00:16:48,840 we will get through this... 235 00:16:50,133 --> 00:16:51,134 together. 236 00:16:56,097 --> 00:16:58,724 - What the hell was that? - I got a match. 237 00:16:58,725 --> 00:17:00,852 Oh, for fuck sakes. 238 00:17:04,272 --> 00:17:07,442 We're gonna get married. I can feel it. 239 00:17:10,569 --> 00:17:11,905 That's your boyfriend? 240 00:17:12,864 --> 00:17:13,989 Yeah, he will be. 241 00:17:13,990 --> 00:17:16,742 He's an actual firefighter who loves puppies. 242 00:17:19,788 --> 00:17:22,539 You see? That's why you're still single. 243 00:17:22,540 --> 00:17:24,041 You know what you need, Shaw? 244 00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:28,004 You need a real man. 245 00:17:29,548 --> 00:17:31,675 One that's willing to make the first move. 246 00:17:35,095 --> 00:17:38,098 Come on, detectives. You're gonna love this. 247 00:17:39,432 --> 00:17:40,433 Check it out. 248 00:17:41,852 --> 00:17:43,562 What is that, a wedding band? 249 00:17:44,020 --> 00:17:45,688 Could it be one of the victim's? 250 00:17:45,689 --> 00:17:46,982 Unlikely. 251 00:17:50,443 --> 00:17:53,738 The initials engraved on the inside... JS. 252 00:17:54,406 --> 00:17:56,533 Doesn't match either of the deceased. 253 00:18:08,086 --> 00:18:10,462 What kind of an animal would do this? 254 00:18:10,463 --> 00:18:15,301 Probably some incel virgin troll living in his mommy's basement. 255 00:18:15,302 --> 00:18:16,595 Assuming it's a man. 256 00:18:17,888 --> 00:18:20,264 What about the girl who never got asked to prom? 257 00:18:20,265 --> 00:18:21,682 The-- The love-scorned woman 258 00:18:21,683 --> 00:18:24,310 who got cheated on one too many times 259 00:18:24,311 --> 00:18:26,353 and just snapped. 260 00:18:26,354 --> 00:18:27,606 Oh, fuck. 261 00:18:28,815 --> 00:18:30,983 Oh. Yes. He replied. 262 00:18:30,984 --> 00:18:32,234 The gay fireman? 263 00:18:32,235 --> 00:18:34,153 No, no. This guy works in tech. 264 00:18:34,154 --> 00:18:37,406 - Shaw's got a fetish for betas. - I don't have a fetish. 265 00:18:37,407 --> 00:18:39,325 Everybody's got a fetish. 266 00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:42,329 Gentlemen, this is more than just a simple murder. 267 00:18:43,580 --> 00:18:44,581 It's a... 268 00:18:48,084 --> 00:18:49,085 ...kink. 269 00:18:49,503 --> 00:18:52,463 That's the understatement of the fucking year. 270 00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:54,507 How do you know for sure it's HEK? 271 00:18:54,508 --> 00:18:56,051 Here you go, Detective. 272 00:18:58,803 --> 00:19:00,095 'Cause this is the last thing 273 00:19:00,096 --> 00:19:01,932 the wedding photographer ever saw. 274 00:19:05,268 --> 00:19:07,478 Heart Eyes has come to our city, boys. 275 00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:08,896 And they've got another ten hours 276 00:19:08,897 --> 00:19:10,982 of Valentine's Day left to kill. 277 00:19:16,530 --> 00:19:18,740 Excuse me. What in hell are you doing? 278 00:19:19,407 --> 00:19:22,785 What do you mean? You just fired me in front of the whole team. 279 00:19:22,786 --> 00:19:25,538 Fired you? I got six more months on your contract. 280 00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:28,999 I intend to squeeze every single last drop out of you. 281 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,168 Okay. Great. So what am I supposed to do? 282 00:19:31,169 --> 00:19:33,796 Get him coffee while he lands the plane? 283 00:19:33,797 --> 00:19:36,674 No. You're gonna turn in a sizzling, 284 00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:39,927 sexy, seductive, blockbuster 285 00:19:39,928 --> 00:19:41,470 Crystal Cane campaign. 286 00:19:41,471 --> 00:19:44,558 And if you don't, I'll kill you. 287 00:19:48,061 --> 00:19:50,020 I'm kidding. I won't. I'll blacklist you, though. 288 00:19:50,021 --> 00:19:51,480 I won't kill you. 289 00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:52,566 I mean, maybe. 290 00:19:53,316 --> 00:19:54,317 But no. 291 00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:55,986 But would I? 292 00:19:58,655 --> 00:20:00,990 "Whoever made this, I hope you get 293 00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:03,784 "murdered and canceled. Not in that order." 294 00:20:03,785 --> 00:20:05,327 "Hashtag do better." 295 00:20:05,328 --> 00:20:07,371 "As someone who may die someday, 296 00:20:07,372 --> 00:20:08,956 "I find this commercial 297 00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:11,959 "to be tone-deaf and borderline ableist." 298 00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:13,461 Wow, people are fucking dumb. 299 00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:17,464 {\an8}"The only thing deader than the couples in this ad 300 00:20:17,465 --> 00:20:20,301 "is the brain cell of the person who created it." 301 00:20:20,302 --> 00:20:23,429 "The level of cringe in this video is off the charts. 302 00:20:23,430 --> 00:20:24,930 "Hashtag just stop." 303 00:20:24,931 --> 00:20:26,016 Hey, Ally? 304 00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:29,978 - Yeah? - Howdy. 305 00:20:31,438 --> 00:20:32,813 Jay? Wha-- 306 00:20:32,814 --> 00:20:35,816 This is the women's bathroom, dude. You can't be in here. 307 00:20:35,817 --> 00:20:38,737 Technically, it is a unisex bathroom, but... 308 00:20:39,571 --> 00:20:40,572 can we talk? 309 00:20:43,783 --> 00:20:45,410 - Hi. - Hi. 310 00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:46,912 I'm... 311 00:20:48,413 --> 00:20:50,206 I am really sorry about earlier. 312 00:20:50,207 --> 00:20:52,458 Oh, no, it's totally fine. 313 00:20:52,459 --> 00:20:54,460 Sorry to stalk and run, 314 00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:56,337 but I'm trying to make this yoga class 315 00:20:56,338 --> 00:20:58,255 that starts in, like, an hour. 316 00:20:58,256 --> 00:21:00,007 You serious? Yoga? 317 00:21:00,008 --> 00:21:01,092 Mmm-hmm. 318 00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:04,053 Aren't we supposed to be saving the company? 319 00:21:04,054 --> 00:21:07,515 Yes, and we will. Just after yoga. 320 00:21:07,516 --> 00:21:10,101 I booked us a table at L'oie. 321 00:21:10,977 --> 00:21:13,354 We get inspired, talk about the campaign. 322 00:21:13,355 --> 00:21:16,190 You realize that it's Valentine's Day, right? 323 00:21:16,191 --> 00:21:18,234 Oh, that's right. 324 00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:20,278 You probably got plans, don't you? 325 00:21:21,905 --> 00:21:23,280 - No. - Well, great! 326 00:21:23,281 --> 00:21:25,324 It'll be a great place for some field research. 327 00:21:25,325 --> 00:21:26,742 Romance, flowers, candles-- 328 00:21:26,743 --> 00:21:28,536 Do you think that maybe we could just do this tomorrow? 329 00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:30,287 Uh, see, I would love to do tomorrow, 330 00:21:30,288 --> 00:21:31,664 I just have to take the first flight 331 00:21:31,665 --> 00:21:33,958 out in the morning for my best friend's wedding. 332 00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:36,168 So, how about this? We'll call it 08:00 sharp, 333 00:21:36,169 --> 00:21:37,795 and I'll see you there. Yeah? I'm excited. 334 00:21:37,796 --> 00:21:39,923 - No, no, I-- - It's gonna be great! 335 00:21:41,716 --> 00:21:42,800 Oh, thank you so much. 336 00:21:42,801 --> 00:21:46,887 Uh, no, Mon. Let me get this. You're, like, $100,000 in debt. 337 00:21:46,888 --> 00:21:48,056 Not anymore. 338 00:21:48,765 --> 00:21:51,100 Arthur paid it off. And I get to keep the card. 339 00:21:51,101 --> 00:21:52,853 - Are you serious? - Mmm-hmm. 340 00:21:53,645 --> 00:21:56,856 Damn. Someone likes a little sugar with their daddy. 341 00:21:56,857 --> 00:22:00,025 A-ha. Excuse me, Ally. I do not have a sugar daddy. 342 00:22:00,026 --> 00:22:01,903 That term is very problematic. 343 00:22:03,321 --> 00:22:04,322 I have a sponsor. 344 00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:08,742 And do you love your sponsor, or is he just erasing your debt? 345 00:22:08,743 --> 00:22:12,288 Yes, I love him. And I love that he's erasing my debt. 346 00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:15,416 So, when am I gonna meet this secret Hugh Hefner? 347 00:22:15,417 --> 00:22:16,750 Shall we all get dinner soon? 348 00:22:16,751 --> 00:22:19,003 What do you say, like, 4:30? Soup? 349 00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:20,546 Ha-ha. Real clever, Miss Judgy Judy, 350 00:22:20,547 --> 00:22:22,256 while you're literally stalking your ex online. 351 00:22:22,257 --> 00:22:24,508 I'm not stalking him. 352 00:22:24,509 --> 00:22:27,428 The algorithm is stalking me, okay? 353 00:22:27,429 --> 00:22:29,972 - It's the algorithm? - Hey, is Arthur Heart Eyes? 354 00:22:29,973 --> 00:22:32,017 Is that why I haven't met him yet? 355 00:22:32,767 --> 00:22:34,269 That's not fucking funny. 356 00:22:38,565 --> 00:22:40,024 Of course Arthur's not Heart Eyes. 357 00:22:40,025 --> 00:22:42,026 That guy has so much arthritis, he can't run. 358 00:22:42,027 --> 00:22:43,986 - Honestly, I bet it's Crystal. - Hmm. 359 00:22:43,987 --> 00:22:45,196 You know when she does that, 360 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:46,697 - like, thing... - Mmm-hmm. 361 00:22:46,698 --> 00:22:48,950 ...when her Botox doesn't sit right and it gets stuck? 362 00:22:51,828 --> 00:22:54,371 {\an8}Breaking news. Our Channel 7 affiliate 363 00:22:54,372 --> 00:22:57,791 {\an8}is reporting that two more couples have been found murdered 364 00:22:57,792 --> 00:22:59,293 {\an8}at a downtown spa. 365 00:22:59,294 --> 00:23:01,420 We go live to the scene in Seattle. 366 00:23:01,421 --> 00:23:02,505 Can't watch this. 367 00:23:02,506 --> 00:23:04,381 Thanks, Mike. We have confirmed reports... 368 00:23:04,382 --> 00:23:05,508 Ally. 369 00:23:05,509 --> 00:23:08,511 - Ally, hello? Hey, ho. - Monica! 370 00:23:08,512 --> 00:23:10,137 Oh, my God. Why are you torturing yourself? 371 00:23:10,138 --> 00:23:11,472 You're the one who ended things. 372 00:23:11,473 --> 00:23:14,308 I know. He just moved on so fast. 373 00:23:14,309 --> 00:23:15,559 I mean, what even is her job? 374 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:17,394 Look at her feed. It's all vacation pics. 375 00:23:17,395 --> 00:23:19,605 And she doesn't even have rich parents. I checked. 376 00:23:19,606 --> 00:23:20,981 You need to stop hate-fucking yourself 377 00:23:20,982 --> 00:23:22,316 and get out there and actually find someone 378 00:23:22,317 --> 00:23:23,943 to actually fuck-fuck yourself, you know? 379 00:23:23,944 --> 00:23:25,277 - No. - Oh, what about that guy? 380 00:23:25,278 --> 00:23:26,445 He's so cute. 381 00:23:26,446 --> 00:23:28,656 The-- The bathroom boy. You know? Your little stalker? 382 00:23:28,657 --> 00:23:30,616 You mean the guy trying to take my job? 383 00:23:30,617 --> 00:23:31,910 Oh, my fuck. 384 00:23:32,911 --> 00:23:35,330 He is so hot, I could literally throw up. 385 00:23:36,456 --> 00:23:38,041 My basement just flooded. 386 00:23:39,876 --> 00:23:41,169 He's okay. 387 00:23:41,545 --> 00:23:43,879 Wait, what are you wearing on this date? 388 00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:45,464 It's not a date. 389 00:23:45,465 --> 00:23:48,008 We're working. And what's wrong with my clothes? 390 00:23:48,009 --> 00:23:51,220 - You look like a before picture. - Monica! That is so mean! 391 00:23:51,221 --> 00:23:52,471 Okay, this place, what's the vibe? 392 00:23:52,472 --> 00:23:53,806 Is it, what, fancy? 393 00:23:53,807 --> 00:23:56,476 - Yeah, it's fancy. Why? - Come on. 394 00:23:57,269 --> 00:23:58,769 Where are we going? 395 00:23:58,770 --> 00:24:00,981 We're gonna go fuck up a credit card. 396 00:24:13,451 --> 00:24:14,910 - It's gorgeous. - So much skin. 397 00:24:14,911 --> 00:24:16,036 - Hike it up a little bit. - It's so much skin. 398 00:24:16,037 --> 00:24:17,914 - It can go shorter. - Monica, no! It's not a date. 399 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:36,766 No. 400 00:24:46,484 --> 00:24:49,737 Hi. Uh, reservation for Simmonds. 401 00:24:49,738 --> 00:24:51,489 Of course. AJ? 402 00:24:53,283 --> 00:24:54,284 Arms out, please. 403 00:24:57,704 --> 00:25:00,039 - What gives? - Heart Eyes. 404 00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:01,374 Can't be too careful. 405 00:25:10,842 --> 00:25:12,636 I'm environmentally conscious. 406 00:25:24,856 --> 00:25:26,690 Sharp, my ass. 407 00:25:26,691 --> 00:25:28,692 You look so beautiful tonight, darling. 408 00:25:28,693 --> 00:25:31,029 Happy Valentine's. I really mean that. 409 00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:35,616 Good evening, miss. Will anyone else be joining you? 410 00:25:35,617 --> 00:25:37,744 Uh, yes. Um, a friend. 411 00:25:38,370 --> 00:25:39,578 A colleague. 412 00:25:39,579 --> 00:25:42,206 It's a-- It's a work dinner. 413 00:25:42,207 --> 00:25:43,958 Well, I'll be back with the specials 414 00:25:43,959 --> 00:25:45,125 once your date arrives. 415 00:25:45,126 --> 00:25:46,837 Oh, no, no, no. He's not my date. 416 00:26:07,148 --> 00:26:10,901 I am so sorry that I am late. I tried to get a car. 417 00:26:10,902 --> 00:26:13,112 And for what it's worth, I had no idea this place 418 00:26:13,113 --> 00:26:14,906 was gonna be this nice, but... 419 00:26:15,866 --> 00:26:18,201 - You look amazing. - Thank you. 420 00:26:19,661 --> 00:26:21,245 Welcome to L'oie. 421 00:26:21,246 --> 00:26:22,788 May I offer you a beverage? 422 00:26:22,789 --> 00:26:25,040 - Um, I'm good. Thank you. - Yeah, please. How about 423 00:26:25,041 --> 00:26:27,334 a bottle of champagne, maybe two glasses? 424 00:26:27,335 --> 00:26:28,586 Oh, uh, no, no, no. I'm sorry. 425 00:26:28,587 --> 00:26:31,755 - No offense, but we're working. - None taken. 426 00:26:31,756 --> 00:26:32,966 I'll be right back. 427 00:26:34,342 --> 00:26:35,969 So, where you from? 428 00:26:37,596 --> 00:26:39,013 Uh, Phoenix. 429 00:26:39,014 --> 00:26:40,307 Do you have siblings? 430 00:26:41,057 --> 00:26:42,057 No. 431 00:26:42,058 --> 00:26:44,102 Are your parents still together? 432 00:26:45,228 --> 00:26:46,478 Mmm-hmm. 433 00:26:46,479 --> 00:26:47,771 Well, that's nice. 434 00:26:47,772 --> 00:26:50,107 Yeah, I'd love to grow old with somebody. 435 00:26:50,108 --> 00:26:51,442 Change their Depends? 436 00:26:51,443 --> 00:26:52,526 You know, 437 00:26:52,527 --> 00:26:55,779 I don't immediately go to poop when I think about love, 438 00:26:55,780 --> 00:26:58,782 but yeah. I would change an adult diaper 439 00:26:58,783 --> 00:27:00,702 if it was in the name of love. 440 00:27:08,126 --> 00:27:09,127 Here we are. 441 00:27:09,628 --> 00:27:11,045 - Thank you. - Thank you. 442 00:27:11,046 --> 00:27:12,380 - Miss? - Yeah. 443 00:27:13,465 --> 00:27:15,300 Didn't want any, but thank you. 444 00:27:17,260 --> 00:27:18,470 And for you, sir? 445 00:27:20,889 --> 00:27:23,057 - Thank you very much. - Enjoy. 446 00:27:23,058 --> 00:27:24,142 What do you say? 447 00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:26,561 To love? 448 00:27:30,941 --> 00:27:31,942 Okay. 449 00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:35,861 - Listen, this is all very cute. - Mmm-hmm. 450 00:27:35,862 --> 00:27:37,613 - And you're smooth. - Oh, thanks. 451 00:27:37,614 --> 00:27:39,782 But I'm just trying to salvage whatever's left 452 00:27:39,783 --> 00:27:41,659 of my career here, so can we skip 453 00:27:41,660 --> 00:27:44,411 whatever this is and get to cracking this campaign? 454 00:27:44,412 --> 00:27:45,704 - By all means. - Okay. 455 00:27:45,705 --> 00:27:47,248 I have a couple ideas in here. 456 00:27:47,249 --> 00:27:50,000 Some probably suck, but I'm sure there's a kernel-- 457 00:27:50,001 --> 00:27:51,878 You've had your heart broken recently. 458 00:27:53,839 --> 00:27:56,382 - I'm sorry, what? - No, I just like to think 459 00:27:56,383 --> 00:27:59,261 I'm intuitive with these things and... 460 00:28:00,428 --> 00:28:03,597 Ew. Yeah, no. I did not get my heart 461 00:28:03,598 --> 00:28:05,182 - broken recently. - Mmm-hmm. 462 00:28:05,183 --> 00:28:06,642 And it's really none of your business. 463 00:28:06,643 --> 00:28:08,185 Oh, you're totally right, it's not. 464 00:28:08,186 --> 00:28:09,854 - Definitely not. Okay. - Nope. 465 00:28:09,855 --> 00:28:12,440 - Um... - It's just your campaign. 466 00:28:13,483 --> 00:28:17,152 Doomed lovers? I mean, it hardly screams romance to me. 467 00:28:18,529 --> 00:28:21,239 The most romantic stories of all time are doomed. 468 00:28:21,240 --> 00:28:23,700 You got husbands, wives, 469 00:28:23,701 --> 00:28:25,451 partners, twin flames, soulmates. 470 00:28:25,452 --> 00:28:28,329 Whatever you wanna call it, it's all gonna end. 471 00:28:28,330 --> 00:28:29,831 It's just a matter of time before 472 00:28:29,832 --> 00:28:31,457 someone cheats, bails, or dies. 473 00:28:31,458 --> 00:28:34,002 What about butterflies in your stomach? 474 00:28:34,003 --> 00:28:36,546 A lightning bolt to the heart? 475 00:28:36,547 --> 00:28:38,131 Cozy Sundays in bed? 476 00:28:38,132 --> 00:28:40,800 What's next, birth charts and long walks on the beach? 477 00:28:40,801 --> 00:28:43,052 I like those things, but I get it. Not for everyone. 478 00:28:43,053 --> 00:28:44,888 You wanna know how I feel about romance? 479 00:28:44,889 --> 00:28:46,056 Yeah. 480 00:28:48,058 --> 00:28:49,393 It's a farce. 481 00:28:51,187 --> 00:28:52,271 A lie. 482 00:28:53,731 --> 00:28:56,400 Not to everyone, I know that. Some people get... 483 00:28:57,193 --> 00:29:01,487 really lucky and stumble into something real and forever. 484 00:29:01,488 --> 00:29:03,114 But the other 99% of us 485 00:29:03,115 --> 00:29:05,992 are just bouncing from one failed experiment to the next, 486 00:29:05,993 --> 00:29:08,912 chasing the same regurgitated fairy-tale bullshit 487 00:29:08,913 --> 00:29:11,748 that's been stuffed into our brains since we were kids. 488 00:29:11,749 --> 00:29:15,001 Prince Charming? Till you catch him fucking your sister. 489 00:29:15,002 --> 00:29:16,669 I thought you were an only child. 490 00:29:16,670 --> 00:29:18,338 - It's a metaphor. Jesus. - Right. 491 00:29:18,339 --> 00:29:20,090 My point is, it's not real. 492 00:29:21,342 --> 00:29:24,427 And somehow, I landed a job that forces me to propagate 493 00:29:24,428 --> 00:29:26,596 a fantasy in order to sell blood diamonds 494 00:29:26,597 --> 00:29:28,264 harvested from third-world slave labor, 495 00:29:28,265 --> 00:29:30,225 so please forgive me if I'm not swept away 496 00:29:30,226 --> 00:29:33,019 by your magical notions of romance, Jay. 497 00:29:33,020 --> 00:29:34,104 Wow. 498 00:29:35,397 --> 00:29:36,732 That's really... 499 00:29:37,942 --> 00:29:38,943 What? 500 00:29:40,069 --> 00:29:41,070 ...sad. 501 00:29:46,408 --> 00:29:47,535 Why are you single? 502 00:29:48,577 --> 00:29:51,247 - Excuse me? - No, really, Mr. Romantic... 503 00:29:52,498 --> 00:29:53,748 doe-eyed, first love, 504 00:29:53,749 --> 00:29:56,376 Esther Perel mama's boy know-it-all. Why are you single? 505 00:29:56,377 --> 00:29:58,461 - Well... - Are you really looking for love 506 00:29:58,462 --> 00:30:00,713 or are you just another fake-ass, ho-hunting, 507 00:30:00,714 --> 00:30:02,632 - ankle-cuff prick in a suit? - Oh, my God. 508 00:30:02,633 --> 00:30:03,758 You know, you don't know me. 509 00:30:03,759 --> 00:30:05,426 And you don't get to cast judgment 510 00:30:05,427 --> 00:30:07,888 just because I don't think like you, okay? 511 00:30:13,936 --> 00:30:14,937 Yeah, um... 512 00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:19,441 I think you were right. Tonight's a bad night. 513 00:30:20,985 --> 00:30:22,902 Should've just let you clear your head. Um... 514 00:30:22,903 --> 00:30:25,281 Don't worry about the champagne. It's on Crystal. 515 00:30:35,624 --> 00:30:40,212 Jay! Jay! I'm sorry, okay? You win. 516 00:30:40,713 --> 00:30:43,214 Listen, I told you it was fine and I meant it. It's all good. 517 00:30:43,215 --> 00:30:45,383 No, I had a really rough day and... 518 00:30:45,384 --> 00:30:48,595 and I took it out on you and that was shitty and wrong and-- 519 00:30:48,596 --> 00:30:50,388 Jay, please, I can't lose this job. 520 00:30:50,389 --> 00:30:52,516 Ally, I am not gonna take your job. 521 00:30:53,184 --> 00:30:54,642 Although it does seem like 522 00:30:54,643 --> 00:30:56,562 you don't really want this job, but... 523 00:30:57,771 --> 00:31:00,315 This is me, so... 524 00:31:00,316 --> 00:31:02,817 I'm gonna go back to the hotel, brainstorm some creative, 525 00:31:02,818 --> 00:31:04,612 see what we can salvage from-- Oh! 526 00:31:10,409 --> 00:31:11,410 Ally? 527 00:31:14,371 --> 00:31:16,414 Collin! What are you doing here? 528 00:31:16,415 --> 00:31:19,918 Um, well, Sienna and I are on a little dinner date, actually. 529 00:31:19,919 --> 00:31:22,254 - I've heard so much about you. - Really? 530 00:31:23,088 --> 00:31:24,089 Why? 531 00:31:25,216 --> 00:31:26,841 And, uh, you are? 532 00:31:26,842 --> 00:31:28,343 Oh, Jay. I'm Ally's... 533 00:31:28,344 --> 00:31:30,011 - He's my friend-- Boyfriend. - ...Boyfriend. 534 00:31:30,012 --> 00:31:31,138 Friend. Boyfriend. 535 00:31:32,014 --> 00:31:33,723 I didn't know you had a boyfriend. 536 00:31:33,724 --> 00:31:35,808 - Yeah! Yeah. - Yeah. 537 00:31:35,809 --> 00:31:37,477 Yeah, I mean, why would you? 538 00:31:37,478 --> 00:31:40,898 It's not like I publicize it on social media or anything. 539 00:31:43,567 --> 00:31:45,485 Uh, well, it's nice to meet you, Jay. 540 00:31:45,486 --> 00:31:48,571 Pleasure. So, um, dinner, huh? 541 00:31:48,572 --> 00:31:50,949 Yeah. Uh, it was supposed to be a double date, 542 00:31:50,950 --> 00:31:53,077 uh, but unfortunately... 543 00:31:53,911 --> 00:31:55,245 - Ooh. - What does that mean? 544 00:31:55,246 --> 00:31:58,499 You know the couple that got murdered up at the winery? 545 00:31:59,542 --> 00:32:01,543 - What, you know them? - We worked together. 546 00:32:01,544 --> 00:32:03,295 - Played racquetball. - Racquetball. 547 00:32:04,296 --> 00:32:05,296 It's tragic, really. 548 00:32:05,297 --> 00:32:07,799 - Still kept the reservation? - And you still came to dinner? 549 00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:09,843 Of course. In their honor. 550 00:32:09,844 --> 00:32:11,594 - Wow. - Huh. Well, a lot to 551 00:32:11,595 --> 00:32:12,804 eat in there and it's good. 552 00:32:12,805 --> 00:32:14,681 We should go. See you, Ally, and... 553 00:32:14,682 --> 00:32:16,057 You have such a sexy suit. 554 00:32:16,058 --> 00:32:18,059 - Oh, that's a sexy dress. - Yeah. Oh, yeah. 555 00:32:18,060 --> 00:32:20,478 - You guys have a good dinner. - Happy Valentine's Day! 556 00:32:20,479 --> 00:32:23,524 - Happy V-Day! - Don't get killed, all right? 557 00:32:24,567 --> 00:32:26,484 - What was-- - Why would he say that? 558 00:32:26,485 --> 00:32:28,444 That was weird. Oh, you're coming with me. 559 00:32:28,445 --> 00:32:30,239 That was so embarrassing. 560 00:32:46,005 --> 00:32:47,006 Thank you. 561 00:32:50,342 --> 00:32:52,803 Not a-- Not a problem. 562 00:33:00,561 --> 00:33:03,438 So is it the accent? Is that what it is? 563 00:33:03,439 --> 00:33:05,356 Women love that fucking accent. 564 00:33:05,357 --> 00:33:07,484 God, I can't stand it now. 565 00:33:08,861 --> 00:33:11,739 - Brits are so unemotional. - Mmm. 566 00:33:12,615 --> 00:33:16,785 Well, that would explain the dead friends' resy. 567 00:33:17,578 --> 00:33:20,622 Love is a beautiful thing, no? 568 00:33:20,623 --> 00:33:22,832 - Oh, we-- we just work together. - No, we're not a couple. 569 00:33:22,833 --> 00:33:24,792 - But you just kissed, no? - Oh, see, no, 570 00:33:24,793 --> 00:33:25,877 that was a performance 571 00:33:25,878 --> 00:33:29,047 to seem maybe more desirable and perhaps less pathetic 572 00:33:29,048 --> 00:33:32,634 - in front of her ex. - Oh. You love Spotify? 573 00:33:32,635 --> 00:33:35,762 I have Ultimate Sexies playlist and-- 574 00:33:35,763 --> 00:33:37,222 - I love Spotify. - Yeah, no, 575 00:33:37,223 --> 00:33:38,515 we're okay. Thank you. 576 00:33:38,516 --> 00:33:40,226 Can we add a stop? 577 00:33:41,685 --> 00:33:43,686 Again, I'm really sorry about tonight. 578 00:33:43,687 --> 00:33:45,230 I swear I'm not a lunatic. 579 00:33:45,231 --> 00:33:48,275 That's exactly what I think a lunatic would say. 580 00:33:49,401 --> 00:33:50,402 Okay. 581 00:33:52,821 --> 00:33:54,656 Have fun at your best friend's wedding. 582 00:33:54,657 --> 00:33:55,741 Thank you. 583 00:34:02,748 --> 00:34:03,749 Okey dokey. 584 00:34:09,547 --> 00:34:10,548 What the... 585 00:34:12,090 --> 00:34:13,091 No! 586 00:34:13,092 --> 00:34:16,637 Next stop, 2640 Westlake Avenue South, sir? 587 00:34:18,389 --> 00:34:21,683 Hey, can you hold off a second? I think she locked herself out. 588 00:34:21,684 --> 00:34:23,768 You know what you should do? 589 00:34:23,769 --> 00:34:26,145 You should go to her, 590 00:34:26,146 --> 00:34:29,233 tell her you love her, then never let her go. 591 00:34:32,653 --> 00:34:36,115 Right. Right. Yeah, you just keep that meter running. 592 00:34:38,075 --> 00:34:40,744 Howdy. Everything okay? 593 00:34:41,412 --> 00:34:42,413 No. 594 00:34:43,289 --> 00:34:45,832 No, I think I left my keys in a dressing room somewhere. 595 00:34:45,833 --> 00:34:46,916 Oh. 596 00:34:47,501 --> 00:34:49,752 Oh, my God. This night could not get any worse. 597 00:34:49,753 --> 00:34:51,005 You have a spare hidden? 598 00:34:51,672 --> 00:34:54,884 Yeah, under a mat upstairs. 599 00:34:56,135 --> 00:34:58,094 It's okay. I'll just break the window. 600 00:34:58,095 --> 00:35:00,763 No. What are you talking about, breaking windows? No. 601 00:35:00,764 --> 00:35:02,223 No, it's fine. My landlord loves me. 602 00:35:02,224 --> 00:35:03,433 Well, if you're serious, 603 00:35:03,434 --> 00:35:04,767 maybe you just, you know, let me do it. 604 00:35:04,768 --> 00:35:06,686 - I can break a window. - No, I know you can 605 00:35:06,687 --> 00:35:08,813 break a window, but if you cut yourself, I'll be-- 606 00:35:08,814 --> 00:35:10,441 I'm not gonna cut myself. 607 00:35:11,609 --> 00:35:12,818 Knock yourself out. 608 00:35:13,485 --> 00:35:16,321 Just know I don't condone this. I'm worried for your safety. 609 00:35:16,322 --> 00:35:18,823 And you're punching with your thumb inside your hand, 610 00:35:18,824 --> 00:35:19,949 which is not a good thing. 611 00:35:19,950 --> 00:35:21,034 Okay. Yeah. You're gonna do it. 612 00:35:21,035 --> 00:35:23,579 Yeah. Why don't you hold that? Came prepared. 613 00:35:25,789 --> 00:35:27,332 Ah, not so bad. 614 00:35:27,333 --> 00:35:28,417 That's bad. 615 00:35:29,335 --> 00:35:31,753 I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. 616 00:35:31,754 --> 00:35:33,838 I'm sorry I'm bleeding all over your floor. 617 00:35:33,839 --> 00:35:37,301 Here. Okay. Let's run it under some water. 618 00:35:39,220 --> 00:35:41,304 - Thanks. - Okay, you're just gonna wash up 619 00:35:41,305 --> 00:35:42,473 in here for a sec. 620 00:35:43,307 --> 00:35:44,599 Oh, God. 621 00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:47,352 Sorry it's so messy. 622 00:35:47,353 --> 00:35:48,520 I had a house cleaner, 623 00:35:48,521 --> 00:35:51,606 but she won the lottery last week and fired me. 624 00:35:51,607 --> 00:35:54,359 Really? How much did she win? 625 00:35:54,360 --> 00:35:56,736 Like, a million dollars. 626 00:35:56,737 --> 00:36:01,992 Damn. Well, I hope you find a replacement soon. 627 00:36:07,331 --> 00:36:08,541 Cute. 628 00:36:09,708 --> 00:36:12,043 I was Pikachu for Halloween too. 629 00:36:12,044 --> 00:36:15,005 - Yeah. That wasn't Halloween. - What was it? 630 00:36:15,756 --> 00:36:18,049 It was Tuesday. Yeah, I was pretty obsessed. 631 00:36:18,050 --> 00:36:19,552 Wore that shit everywhere. 632 00:36:21,387 --> 00:36:23,388 - I'll take that. - It was on your shelf. 633 00:36:23,389 --> 00:36:24,889 No, I really wasn't expecting company. 634 00:36:24,890 --> 00:36:26,140 Ever? 635 00:36:26,141 --> 00:36:27,725 Why don't you just take a seat 636 00:36:27,726 --> 00:36:29,562 while I look for the first aid kit? 637 00:36:35,943 --> 00:36:36,944 Found it! 638 00:36:41,532 --> 00:36:42,533 Jay? 639 00:36:49,665 --> 00:36:50,666 Excuse you. 640 00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:53,669 I'm sorry. I didn't wanna sit on your nice clothes. 641 00:36:56,213 --> 00:36:57,214 Ow. 642 00:36:58,757 --> 00:36:59,758 Would you relax? 643 00:37:00,467 --> 00:37:02,428 It's just a very expensive jacket. 644 00:37:03,971 --> 00:37:05,431 Let's see your hand. 645 00:37:07,850 --> 00:37:09,685 - Ooh. - Careful now. 646 00:37:10,561 --> 00:37:11,562 Does it hurt? 647 00:37:12,813 --> 00:37:15,232 No, actually. You're really good at this. 648 00:37:15,816 --> 00:37:17,400 Did you go to med school or something? 649 00:37:17,401 --> 00:37:20,571 I dropped out actually. 650 00:37:21,947 --> 00:37:23,198 I really can't do blood. 651 00:37:23,199 --> 00:37:24,782 - No way. - Mmm, way. 652 00:37:24,783 --> 00:37:26,117 Hmm. 653 00:37:26,118 --> 00:37:28,953 Well, I think you're doing a pretty good job right now, 654 00:37:28,954 --> 00:37:30,456 if I do say so myself. 655 00:37:31,499 --> 00:37:32,540 - Uh-- - Oh. 656 00:37:32,541 --> 00:37:34,542 This is why we dropped out of med school 657 00:37:34,543 --> 00:37:36,378 and pivoted to advertising. 658 00:37:38,214 --> 00:37:39,215 You're funny. 659 00:37:39,798 --> 00:37:41,717 - Am I? - I think so, yeah. 660 00:37:46,305 --> 00:37:48,640 Would you mind? My hair, falling in my face. 661 00:37:48,641 --> 00:37:49,975 - Oh, of course. - Thank you. 662 00:37:57,566 --> 00:37:59,777 - Okay. There we go. - Oh, wow. 663 00:38:04,865 --> 00:38:06,783 So, you mind my asking 664 00:38:06,784 --> 00:38:09,495 what kind of medicine you were planning on going into? 665 00:38:10,287 --> 00:38:12,205 Uh, nephrology. 666 00:38:12,206 --> 00:38:13,832 That's the liver. 667 00:38:13,833 --> 00:38:14,916 Kidneys. 668 00:38:14,917 --> 00:38:16,292 - Nailed it. Damn. - Yeah. 669 00:38:16,293 --> 00:38:17,794 Well, why that? 670 00:38:17,795 --> 00:38:20,088 I had a family member that was pretty sick. 671 00:38:20,089 --> 00:38:21,297 Mmm-hmm. 672 00:38:21,298 --> 00:38:24,927 Guess I-- I don't know, thought I could fix people. 673 00:38:26,971 --> 00:38:29,389 Anyway, now I'm considered hemophobic. 674 00:38:29,390 --> 00:38:30,474 Oh. 675 00:38:31,058 --> 00:38:34,269 - I didn't take you for a bigot. - Okay, wow. 676 00:38:34,270 --> 00:38:37,940 Between that and coffee mates, your dad jokes are top-notch. 677 00:38:39,483 --> 00:38:42,986 I'm being facetious obviously. Your jokes are cheesy as-- 678 00:38:42,987 --> 00:38:44,071 Fuck! 679 00:38:44,864 --> 00:38:46,364 Ally! Ally! 680 00:38:46,365 --> 00:38:47,449 Oh, shit! 681 00:38:58,127 --> 00:39:00,379 Fuck you! No, no, no, no, no, no! 682 00:39:01,839 --> 00:39:02,840 Run! 683 00:39:06,218 --> 00:39:08,595 Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! What are you doing? 684 00:39:08,596 --> 00:39:10,305 Get your mind out of the gutter! 685 00:39:10,306 --> 00:39:11,431 Yep, yep, yep, yep. 686 00:39:11,432 --> 00:39:13,225 Come on. Come on, come on. Come on, come on! 687 00:39:14,560 --> 00:39:16,145 Come on, come on, come on! 688 00:39:16,937 --> 00:39:18,397 - You got it? - Yes! 689 00:39:21,192 --> 00:39:22,193 Good job. 690 00:39:23,527 --> 00:39:24,528 Thanks. 691 00:39:26,071 --> 00:39:27,865 Hey, you good? 692 00:39:28,324 --> 00:39:29,325 Yeah. 693 00:39:32,369 --> 00:39:34,997 - Help! He's trying to kill us! - Oh, here's lovebirds. 694 00:39:37,541 --> 00:39:39,125 No! No, no, no. You've got the wrong people. 695 00:39:39,126 --> 00:39:40,877 - Hey! What are you doing? - He only kills couples, right? 696 00:39:40,878 --> 00:39:42,670 We're not a couple. We barely know each other. 697 00:39:42,671 --> 00:39:44,882 So back the fuck off! 698 00:39:45,549 --> 00:39:47,051 911, what's your emergency? 699 00:39:48,177 --> 00:39:49,178 Run! 700 00:39:51,889 --> 00:39:54,266 Help! Help! 701 00:39:55,184 --> 00:39:56,185 Help us! 702 00:40:03,651 --> 00:40:05,318 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 703 00:40:05,319 --> 00:40:06,403 What? 704 00:40:08,489 --> 00:40:09,573 Did you hear that? 705 00:40:11,534 --> 00:40:12,618 I don't hear anything. 706 00:40:13,536 --> 00:40:14,537 Oh, shit! 707 00:40:15,454 --> 00:40:16,455 Ally! 708 00:40:17,414 --> 00:40:19,040 Get off of her! 709 00:40:19,041 --> 00:40:20,835 Hey, hey! 710 00:40:23,835 --> 00:40:53,835 YAWNTiC Encode | www.movieddl.me 711 00:42:55,906 --> 00:42:58,993 No! No! No! 712 00:43:00,995 --> 00:43:02,788 Help! He's right behind... 713 00:43:05,166 --> 00:43:06,458 - Here! - ...me. 714 00:43:08,794 --> 00:43:11,130 He was-- He was right here. 715 00:43:11,922 --> 00:43:13,215 I'll go check it out. 716 00:43:15,176 --> 00:43:16,177 Oh, my God. Jay. 717 00:43:17,136 --> 00:43:19,012 - Jay, is he okay? - I don't know who 718 00:43:19,013 --> 00:43:20,555 - you're talking about. - Jay Simmonds. 719 00:43:20,556 --> 00:43:21,931 We-- We were with each other all night 720 00:43:21,932 --> 00:43:24,934 and-- and we got attacked and we got separated back there. 721 00:43:24,935 --> 00:43:27,145 - You just left him? - No, I didn't leave him! 722 00:43:27,146 --> 00:43:29,689 All units. All units, stand down. 723 00:43:29,690 --> 00:43:31,524 We have Heart Eyes. 724 00:43:31,525 --> 00:43:33,902 - I repeat, we have Heart Eyes. - Yes! We got that motherfucker! 725 00:43:33,903 --> 00:43:35,570 Seattle PD, baby! Fuck, yeah! 726 00:43:35,571 --> 00:43:37,405 On behalf of Seattle PD, I just wanna say-- 727 00:43:37,406 --> 00:43:39,032 Yeah, congratulations. 728 00:43:39,033 --> 00:43:40,993 Incredible teamwork, huh? 729 00:43:44,622 --> 00:43:46,832 Hey! Hey, you need to back up! 730 00:43:48,334 --> 00:43:50,168 - Fucking weirdos. - What did I do? 731 00:43:50,169 --> 00:43:51,253 Detectives. 732 00:43:53,255 --> 00:43:54,340 Here she is. 733 00:43:55,341 --> 00:43:56,591 Detective Zeke Hobbs. 734 00:43:56,592 --> 00:43:58,886 This is my partner, Detective Jeanine Shaw. 735 00:44:01,388 --> 00:44:02,389 Hobbs and Shaw? 736 00:44:04,141 --> 00:44:05,392 Like the movie? 737 00:44:08,229 --> 00:44:10,063 - I haven't heard of it. - I haven't seen it. 738 00:44:10,064 --> 00:44:12,650 - We're here to ID a murderer. - Oh, my God. Jay? 739 00:44:13,776 --> 00:44:14,777 Jay! 740 00:44:15,945 --> 00:44:18,072 - Jay, are you okay? - Mmm-mmm. 741 00:44:19,448 --> 00:44:20,449 - Jay! - Nope. 742 00:44:21,575 --> 00:44:23,201 Jay, are you okay? 743 00:44:23,202 --> 00:44:26,496 Uh, no, Ally, I'm not okay. 744 00:44:26,497 --> 00:44:29,166 Thank you for asking. You ditched me. 745 00:44:29,917 --> 00:44:32,043 What? I did not ditch you! 746 00:44:32,044 --> 00:44:35,088 Oh, yes, you did! You absolutely ditched me. We were a team. 747 00:44:35,089 --> 00:44:38,716 I was being chased by a fucking serial killer! 748 00:44:38,717 --> 00:44:42,971 I know! I also was being chased by a serial killer. 749 00:44:42,972 --> 00:44:45,890 - What the fuck does that mean? - Jay, you're tall and ripped 750 00:44:45,891 --> 00:44:48,309 and-- and perfectly capable of defending yourself. 751 00:44:48,310 --> 00:44:50,895 Ally, I really appreciate the compliments, 752 00:44:50,896 --> 00:44:52,313 especially coming from you, 753 00:44:52,314 --> 00:44:54,315 but right now is not the time, okay? 754 00:44:54,316 --> 00:44:56,401 These muscles were not made for violence! 755 00:44:56,402 --> 00:44:57,652 They're for cuddling! 756 00:44:57,653 --> 00:44:59,237 - Okay. - Hey, we're talking here! 757 00:44:59,238 --> 00:45:01,447 Guys, this was not him. We were together all night. 758 00:45:01,448 --> 00:45:03,116 Heart Eyes was after both of us. 759 00:45:03,117 --> 00:45:06,495 Ma'am... We found this man in the park wearing this 760 00:45:07,788 --> 00:45:09,372 and in possession of this. 761 00:45:09,373 --> 00:45:10,623 Come on! 762 00:45:10,624 --> 00:45:12,917 No, that's-- That's not possible. 763 00:45:12,918 --> 00:45:14,170 Jay didn't do this. 764 00:45:15,004 --> 00:45:16,005 Maybe. 765 00:45:17,423 --> 00:45:19,008 Maybe Jay wasn't acting alone. 766 00:45:20,050 --> 00:45:21,134 - What? - What? 767 00:45:21,135 --> 00:45:22,677 We're gonna have to take your 768 00:45:22,678 --> 00:45:24,722 tall, ripped friend in for questioning. 769 00:45:27,266 --> 00:45:28,267 Oh! 770 00:45:29,476 --> 00:45:32,521 Hey, good going. Really great. 771 00:45:35,065 --> 00:45:36,692 See you at the station, I guess. 772 00:45:39,403 --> 00:45:41,363 Fuck. 773 00:45:44,408 --> 00:45:45,409 What is this? 774 00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:47,161 That's a ring. 775 00:45:48,954 --> 00:45:51,247 - Read it. - Read what? 776 00:45:51,248 --> 00:45:53,500 Let me help you out. Let me help you out. 777 00:45:53,501 --> 00:45:54,585 It says, "JS." 778 00:45:57,087 --> 00:45:59,506 - As in "Jay Simmonds." - "Jay Simmonds." 779 00:45:59,507 --> 00:46:01,549 You are really good. 780 00:46:01,550 --> 00:46:03,384 You're really good at detective work. 781 00:46:03,385 --> 00:46:05,095 That was really-- It's impressive. 782 00:46:10,100 --> 00:46:11,101 That sarcasm? 783 00:46:12,561 --> 00:46:15,730 A, I am not married. 784 00:46:15,731 --> 00:46:19,984 B, why would I leave a wedding band at the scene of the crime? 785 00:46:19,985 --> 00:46:21,194 And C, 786 00:46:21,195 --> 00:46:23,530 who gets their own initials 787 00:46:23,531 --> 00:46:25,782 engraved in their own fucking wedding band? 788 00:46:25,783 --> 00:46:27,032 Also, D, 789 00:46:27,033 --> 00:46:28,952 yes, that was sarcasm. 790 00:46:29,619 --> 00:46:31,703 - Hey, hey, hey! Hobbs. - Hey, relax. Relax! 791 00:46:31,704 --> 00:46:33,414 Take five. Go. Go. 792 00:46:34,666 --> 00:46:35,667 Cool down. 793 00:46:36,292 --> 00:46:38,503 Come on. 794 00:46:45,718 --> 00:46:48,303 I'm sorry. He can get a little hot under the collar. 795 00:46:48,304 --> 00:46:50,055 Yeah. No kidding. 796 00:46:50,056 --> 00:46:52,140 Do you need anything? Water, coffee? 797 00:46:52,141 --> 00:46:55,603 - I am fine, thank you very much. - Okay. 798 00:47:00,275 --> 00:47:01,276 Just you and me. 799 00:47:07,699 --> 00:47:09,659 I want you to look me in the eyes 800 00:47:10,827 --> 00:47:12,161 and tell me the truth. 801 00:47:15,790 --> 00:47:16,791 All right. 802 00:47:17,625 --> 00:47:19,085 How long have you known Ally? 803 00:47:19,794 --> 00:47:20,795 Fourteen hours. 804 00:47:22,881 --> 00:47:24,257 You seem to care about her. 805 00:47:27,385 --> 00:47:29,304 Yeah. Maybe I do. 806 00:47:33,141 --> 00:47:35,851 But that ring. That's... It's not yours, correct? 807 00:47:35,852 --> 00:47:38,479 No. Again, I am not married. 808 00:47:39,147 --> 00:47:40,147 You're not married. 809 00:47:40,148 --> 00:47:41,857 I mean, it's not, like, by choice or anything. 810 00:47:41,858 --> 00:47:44,359 I--I just haven't met the right person. 811 00:47:44,360 --> 00:47:45,528 You're telling me. 812 00:47:46,654 --> 00:47:49,032 - You're-- - Single. Shocker. 813 00:47:51,117 --> 00:47:52,118 Kind of. 814 00:47:53,036 --> 00:47:54,704 No-- You really, um... 815 00:47:59,083 --> 00:48:00,210 Okay, um... 816 00:48:01,961 --> 00:48:04,254 Lady, I have been waiting here for over an hour. 817 00:48:04,255 --> 00:48:06,548 First of all, it's "officer." 818 00:48:06,549 --> 00:48:08,258 Second, I already told you 819 00:48:08,259 --> 00:48:09,968 they're interrogating the suspect. 820 00:48:09,969 --> 00:48:12,471 And I already told you they're interrogating the wrong guy. 821 00:48:12,472 --> 00:48:14,306 Can you please just go back there 822 00:48:14,307 --> 00:48:16,183 and give me some sort of information? 823 00:48:16,184 --> 00:48:18,477 Sorry, Fran. The ethernet cable was all frayed. 824 00:48:18,478 --> 00:48:20,813 - Should be working now. - Thanks, David. 825 00:48:21,064 --> 00:48:25,526 What's a five-letter word for a dog ending in H? 826 00:48:25,527 --> 00:48:26,611 Bitch? 827 00:48:27,320 --> 00:48:28,321 Excuse me? 828 00:48:29,072 --> 00:48:30,073 Female dog. 829 00:48:32,825 --> 00:48:35,328 Oh, yeah. Thanks. 830 00:48:35,954 --> 00:48:38,832 Can you please go back there now and give me some sort of update? 831 00:48:41,376 --> 00:48:42,919 - Fine. - Thank you. 832 00:48:43,378 --> 00:48:45,839 Hey. Do we know each other? 833 00:48:46,714 --> 00:48:48,591 No, I don't think so. 834 00:48:49,467 --> 00:48:50,468 Bumble. 835 00:48:50,969 --> 00:48:53,471 Yeah, no. I'm... I'm not on the apps. 836 00:48:53,638 --> 00:48:55,848 Oh. It's a waste of time anyway. 837 00:48:55,849 --> 00:48:56,975 Hmm. 838 00:48:58,935 --> 00:49:00,269 Just shooting my shot here. 839 00:49:00,270 --> 00:49:03,021 Um, could I take you out to coffee some time? 840 00:49:03,022 --> 00:49:04,190 I'll pay for it. 841 00:49:05,316 --> 00:49:07,443 I almost got murdered tonight. 842 00:49:09,279 --> 00:49:10,947 - I am so sorry. Um... - Yeah. 843 00:49:11,823 --> 00:49:13,824 Stay safe. Have a good night. 844 00:49:13,825 --> 00:49:14,951 Thank you. 845 00:49:16,369 --> 00:49:18,037 Where the hell is everybody? 846 00:49:18,705 --> 00:49:19,706 Celebrating. 847 00:49:21,749 --> 00:49:23,126 They caught Heart Eyes. 848 00:49:34,929 --> 00:49:36,556 So, what else do you want to tell me? 849 00:49:37,390 --> 00:49:38,808 I'm not a serial killer. 850 00:49:40,435 --> 00:49:41,811 So there's that. 851 00:49:41,936 --> 00:49:45,564 Were you in Boston in February of '23 852 00:49:45,565 --> 00:49:47,734 and Philadelphia in February of '24? 853 00:49:49,402 --> 00:49:50,402 I... 854 00:49:50,403 --> 00:49:53,197 Let me rephrase. You were in Boston and Philly. 855 00:49:53,198 --> 00:49:54,698 Same dates and locations 856 00:49:54,699 --> 00:49:56,784 as HEK's two prior killing sprees. 857 00:49:58,536 --> 00:49:59,871 Jay, I got to admit... 858 00:50:00,622 --> 00:50:02,290 that doesn't look very good. 859 00:50:03,291 --> 00:50:05,042 I-- I don't know what you want me to say. 860 00:50:05,043 --> 00:50:08,922 I'm a freelancer, so yeah, I travel for, like, work. 861 00:50:10,507 --> 00:50:12,842 Do you ever get lonely on the road? 862 00:50:14,469 --> 00:50:17,721 I like to think that I can keep myself busy. 863 00:50:17,722 --> 00:50:19,474 Yeah? How? 864 00:50:20,517 --> 00:50:21,767 How do you blow off steam 865 00:50:21,768 --> 00:50:23,895 when you're alone with your thoughts, Jay? 866 00:50:26,648 --> 00:50:28,066 Do you go to a vineyard? 867 00:50:29,234 --> 00:50:30,401 Maybe a spa? 868 00:50:40,620 --> 00:50:41,621 Holy... Who-- 869 00:50:44,374 --> 00:50:46,625 So, for HEK to come out of the blue 870 00:50:46,626 --> 00:50:50,045 and denounce Valentine's Day and all it stands for... 871 00:50:50,046 --> 00:50:51,130 Hello? 872 00:50:51,256 --> 00:50:53,131 ...by cutting these couples down to size. 873 00:50:53,132 --> 00:50:55,593 In my professional opinion, what we have here... 874 00:50:56,678 --> 00:50:57,679 Detective. 875 00:50:58,221 --> 00:50:59,763 We got an HWW out front. 876 00:50:59,764 --> 00:51:00,973 What do you want me to do with her? 877 00:51:00,974 --> 00:51:02,224 An HWW? 878 00:51:02,225 --> 00:51:03,892 "Hysterical white woman." 879 00:51:03,893 --> 00:51:05,061 I'll handle her. 880 00:51:06,563 --> 00:51:07,564 You sit tight. 881 00:51:08,857 --> 00:51:09,983 We're not done yet. 882 00:51:12,068 --> 00:51:13,069 I'll be here. 883 00:51:13,987 --> 00:51:16,238 He just snapped. 884 00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:20,701 And he makes it a point to kill again and again 885 00:51:20,702 --> 00:51:23,203 until the very concept of an entire day 886 00:51:23,204 --> 00:51:27,959 dedicated to couples and romance is eradicated. 887 00:51:28,793 --> 00:51:33,715 He sneaks into your house and waits in the dark. 888 00:51:34,507 --> 00:51:38,511 Cunning and quiet as a corpse. 889 00:51:39,846 --> 00:51:43,099 And then, when you least expect it... 890 00:51:44,851 --> 00:51:49,938 he pulls out one of the many, many, many toys 891 00:51:49,939 --> 00:51:51,983 from his tools. 892 00:52:09,751 --> 00:52:11,835 - What the hell are you doing? - God... 893 00:52:11,836 --> 00:52:13,546 bless the USA. 894 00:52:14,005 --> 00:52:15,088 - Told ya. - Yeah. 895 00:52:15,089 --> 00:52:16,174 I'm so sorry. 896 00:52:17,383 --> 00:52:19,426 - Are you letting him go? - Not yet. 897 00:52:19,427 --> 00:52:21,553 Why the hell not? He's innocent! 898 00:52:21,554 --> 00:52:23,680 Mmm-hmm. Well, then tell me something. 899 00:52:23,681 --> 00:52:25,641 Why is the Heart Eyes Killer after him? 900 00:52:25,642 --> 00:52:27,727 - You're not a couple. - I don't know. 901 00:52:28,436 --> 00:52:31,855 I assume he saw us and thought we were together. 902 00:52:31,856 --> 00:52:32,941 Why? 903 00:52:34,734 --> 00:52:35,735 We... 904 00:52:37,779 --> 00:52:38,821 kissed. 905 00:52:42,283 --> 00:52:44,869 We had-- We had-- We had-- We had to kiss. 906 00:52:46,120 --> 00:52:48,957 We had to kiss because... because my ex... 907 00:52:49,916 --> 00:52:52,460 he was there, and I was jealous. 908 00:52:53,628 --> 00:52:55,629 - It's really stupid, I know. - Okay. 909 00:52:55,630 --> 00:52:56,714 I get it. 910 00:52:57,841 --> 00:52:58,842 I do. 911 00:53:02,762 --> 00:53:05,932 So you're not interested in him romantically? 912 00:53:07,225 --> 00:53:08,601 Why is that relevant? 913 00:53:09,519 --> 00:53:10,645 Just girl talk. 914 00:53:11,187 --> 00:53:12,981 I mean, he's cute, he has a... 915 00:53:13,690 --> 00:53:15,608 really good job. 916 00:53:17,277 --> 00:53:19,737 Perfect candidate for a little girl like yourself. 917 00:53:21,906 --> 00:53:23,658 A little girl like myself? 918 00:53:27,287 --> 00:53:28,454 Ay. 919 00:53:29,539 --> 00:53:32,124 Oh, relax. Probably just the breaker. 920 00:53:32,125 --> 00:53:34,961 That's what people say before they get stabbed to death. 921 00:53:36,588 --> 00:53:37,714 How would you know? 922 00:53:39,883 --> 00:53:40,884 Watch her. 923 00:53:43,344 --> 00:53:44,887 No, no, no, no, no. She said to watch me. 924 00:53:44,888 --> 00:53:47,556 Calm down, I'm just getting a flashlight. Little space? 925 00:53:47,557 --> 00:53:49,642 Any closer, you'd be inside me. 926 00:53:50,351 --> 00:53:52,061 I'm sorry. I'm just scared. 927 00:53:54,022 --> 00:53:56,357 No, no, no, no. Careful. He hides in closets. 928 00:54:05,491 --> 00:54:06,993 No killers in here. 929 00:54:51,496 --> 00:54:52,497 Help! 930 00:54:54,707 --> 00:54:56,291 Hey! Hey! What-- What's happening? 931 00:54:56,292 --> 00:54:57,585 - He's here. - Who? 932 00:54:59,587 --> 00:55:00,964 Go! Get back! Get back! 933 00:55:09,472 --> 00:55:11,598 Hey. Hey. Hey, hey. Hey! 934 00:55:11,599 --> 00:55:13,308 Where are you going? Uncuff me. 935 00:55:13,309 --> 00:55:14,811 Don't worry, lover boy. 936 00:55:15,520 --> 00:55:16,813 I'll protect you. 937 00:55:17,522 --> 00:55:20,275 No. No. No. 938 00:55:28,533 --> 00:55:30,076 God! Damn it! 939 00:55:34,497 --> 00:55:35,748 Shaw? 940 00:55:55,143 --> 00:55:56,144 Shaw! 941 00:56:32,096 --> 00:56:33,097 Jay? 942 00:56:34,098 --> 00:56:35,099 Jay! 943 00:56:36,184 --> 00:56:37,519 Jay, can you hear me? 944 00:56:38,353 --> 00:56:39,686 Yes, yes, Ally. 945 00:56:39,687 --> 00:56:41,856 Ally, you've gotta find the keys. 946 00:56:42,190 --> 00:56:45,067 Uh, Hobbs has the keys, okay? You have to find Hobbs 947 00:56:45,068 --> 00:56:48,655 'cause he locked me in here like a fucking asshole. 948 00:56:50,782 --> 00:56:51,783 Ally? 949 00:56:54,786 --> 00:56:55,787 Ally? 950 00:56:59,791 --> 00:57:01,084 She ditched me. 951 00:57:03,461 --> 00:57:04,462 That's okay. 952 00:57:07,006 --> 00:57:08,007 Ally? 953 00:57:20,979 --> 00:57:22,021 Hey. 954 00:57:26,276 --> 00:57:27,277 Hey. 955 00:57:31,531 --> 00:57:32,532 Come on. 956 00:57:33,116 --> 00:57:34,117 Hey, come on. 957 00:57:34,534 --> 00:57:35,535 This is not fair! 958 00:57:38,121 --> 00:57:39,122 Shit! 959 00:57:48,923 --> 00:57:50,008 Die. 960 00:57:52,385 --> 00:57:53,511 Ally! Ally! 961 00:57:54,053 --> 00:57:55,805 Goddamn! I'm right here! 962 00:57:57,974 --> 00:57:58,975 Jay! 963 00:57:59,642 --> 00:58:00,643 Careful! Careful. 964 00:58:03,563 --> 00:58:04,647 - Hi. - Hi. 965 00:58:07,942 --> 00:58:08,943 Are you okay? 966 00:58:10,612 --> 00:58:12,613 You're a terrible shot, by the way. 967 00:58:12,614 --> 00:58:14,407 Don't fucking push it, Romeo. 968 00:58:17,702 --> 00:58:19,578 - No! Hey! - Ally! 969 00:58:19,579 --> 00:58:21,706 - Stop! - No, no, no! Ally! 970 00:58:23,082 --> 00:58:24,374 Fucking assholes! 971 00:58:24,375 --> 00:58:25,709 You saved my life. 972 00:58:25,710 --> 00:58:26,878 You saved mine. 973 00:58:27,587 --> 00:58:28,588 I owed you one. 974 00:58:33,134 --> 00:58:34,426 We're not together! 975 00:58:34,427 --> 00:58:36,011 Go kill somebody else! 976 00:58:36,012 --> 00:58:38,431 - Get up. Get up. Get up. - He's coming. He's coming. 977 00:58:45,230 --> 00:58:48,273 Oh, fuck. Do you know what we just did? 978 00:58:48,274 --> 00:58:50,984 Yeah. We led a couples-killing maniac to a... 979 00:58:50,985 --> 00:58:52,986 - To an all-you-can-kill buffet. - Come on. 980 00:58:52,987 --> 00:58:55,781 A big fat lummox like you hiring an aeroplane to write, 981 00:58:55,782 --> 00:58:59,369 "Hildy, don't be hasty. Remember my dimple. Walter." 982 00:58:59,744 --> 00:59:01,203 Delayed our divorce 20 minutes 983 00:59:01,204 --> 00:59:03,039 while the judge went out to watch it. 984 00:59:07,836 --> 00:59:09,003 Are you kidding me? 985 00:59:10,922 --> 00:59:12,882 Oh, shit! 986 00:59:21,766 --> 00:59:23,226 Yo, that costume is dope. 987 00:59:26,896 --> 00:59:28,022 I don't like that. 988 00:59:31,067 --> 00:59:32,610 That's not him, right? 989 00:59:33,945 --> 00:59:35,070 What the fuck? 990 00:59:35,071 --> 00:59:36,154 It is him! 991 00:59:36,155 --> 00:59:37,239 Was it my fault? 992 00:59:37,240 --> 00:59:39,992 Did I know that coal mine was gonna have another cave-in? 993 00:59:39,993 --> 00:59:43,120 I intended to be with you on our honeymoon, Hildy. 994 00:59:43,121 --> 00:59:44,205 'Sup, man? 995 00:59:47,041 --> 00:59:49,626 I spent two weeks in a coal mine with John Kruptzky. 996 00:59:49,627 --> 00:59:51,253 You don't deny that, do you, Walter? 997 00:59:51,254 --> 00:59:52,504 Deny it? I'm proud of it. 998 00:59:52,505 --> 00:59:54,173 We beat the whole country on that story. 999 00:59:54,174 --> 00:59:56,258 Suppose we did. That isn't what I got married for! 1000 00:59:56,259 --> 00:59:57,343 Excuse us. 1001 00:59:58,845 --> 00:59:59,888 What a creep. 1002 01:00:05,018 --> 01:00:06,018 Left. Left. 1003 01:00:06,019 --> 01:00:08,146 No. Right. Go. Go, go, go. 1004 01:00:09,230 --> 01:00:10,231 Turn. 1005 01:00:12,775 --> 01:00:13,776 In here. 1006 01:00:27,624 --> 01:00:28,832 Hmm? 1007 01:00:28,833 --> 01:00:31,585 Put a fucking shirt on. There's a killer after us. 1008 01:00:31,586 --> 01:00:33,379 Mmm. Oh, what is it? 1009 01:00:34,714 --> 01:00:36,298 The Heart Eyes Killer. 1010 01:00:36,299 --> 01:00:38,675 He's out there right now. We need to be quiet. 1011 01:00:38,676 --> 01:00:42,387 Oh! Dude, that's so hot. Fuck. 1012 01:00:42,388 --> 01:00:44,515 - We love role-play. - Yeah. 1013 01:00:44,516 --> 01:00:46,975 - Oh, my God. He's coming. - We're so dead. 1014 01:00:46,976 --> 01:00:48,977 Oh, he's so scary and big. 1015 01:00:48,978 --> 01:00:50,480 - We can't stay here. - No. 1016 01:00:54,609 --> 01:00:56,151 - ...without shuddering. - Walter... 1017 01:00:56,152 --> 01:00:57,861 I made a great reporter out of you. 1018 01:00:57,862 --> 01:00:59,988 You won't be half as good on another paper. 1019 01:00:59,989 --> 01:01:01,073 We're a team. 1020 01:01:01,074 --> 01:01:03,158 You need me, I need you, the paper needs us! 1021 01:01:03,159 --> 01:01:04,327 Sold, American! 1022 01:01:05,745 --> 01:01:07,371 It just didn't work out, Walter. 1023 01:01:07,372 --> 01:01:08,455 Oh, fuck. 1024 01:01:08,456 --> 01:01:10,916 It would've worked out if you'd been satisfied... 1025 01:01:10,917 --> 01:01:12,835 Maybe we lay low for a little bit. 1026 01:01:12,836 --> 01:01:13,961 Yeah. 1027 01:01:13,962 --> 01:01:15,088 I wasn't satisfied. 1028 01:01:15,630 --> 01:01:17,047 I suppose I proposed to you? 1029 01:01:17,048 --> 01:01:18,131 You practically did. 1030 01:01:18,132 --> 01:01:20,300 Making goo-goo eyes at me for two years. 1031 01:01:20,301 --> 01:01:22,261 "Oh, Walter." And I still... 1032 01:01:22,262 --> 01:01:24,304 I actually kind of like this movie. 1033 01:01:24,305 --> 01:01:26,099 - Yeah, you like that? - Yeah. 1034 01:01:26,933 --> 01:01:27,976 Really? 1035 01:01:30,061 --> 01:01:31,646 Yeah. Are you surprised? 1036 01:01:33,940 --> 01:01:35,483 Little bit, yeah. 1037 01:01:40,697 --> 01:01:42,407 I did ditch you. 1038 01:01:44,158 --> 01:01:45,994 No. Ditch me? 1039 01:01:48,204 --> 01:01:49,539 It's what I'm best at. 1040 01:01:50,248 --> 01:01:51,958 - Ditching people? - Running. 1041 01:01:52,584 --> 01:01:54,793 Hey, I was holding my own. You didn't see me? 1042 01:01:54,794 --> 01:01:56,921 He was shaking in his little leather boots. 1043 01:02:01,634 --> 01:02:04,137 Jay, I wasn't entirely honest at dinner. 1044 01:02:05,555 --> 01:02:07,473 My parents had this, like... 1045 01:02:09,017 --> 01:02:10,727 storybook romance. 1046 01:02:12,312 --> 01:02:14,063 They were literally perfect together. 1047 01:02:17,525 --> 01:02:18,818 And then my dad died. 1048 01:02:22,655 --> 01:02:24,699 I don't think my mom ever fully recovered. 1049 01:02:28,453 --> 01:02:29,454 I'm sorry. 1050 01:02:32,957 --> 01:02:34,292 You know, when I was a kid, 1051 01:02:35,418 --> 01:02:38,713 my parents just... hated each other. 1052 01:02:39,672 --> 01:02:42,884 I mean, they fought... all the time. 1053 01:02:44,511 --> 01:02:45,803 I think that... 1054 01:02:46,930 --> 01:02:48,431 is why I'm just this... 1055 01:02:50,266 --> 01:02:51,726 hapless romantic. 1056 01:02:53,019 --> 01:02:56,563 Just putting every girl I fall for on a pedestal, 1057 01:02:56,564 --> 01:02:59,608 only to have my heart broken over... 1058 01:02:59,609 --> 01:03:01,360 - More. - and over... 1059 01:03:01,361 --> 01:03:02,528 More? 1060 01:03:02,529 --> 01:03:03,655 ...and over. 1061 01:03:05,406 --> 01:03:06,615 Keep going. 1062 01:03:06,616 --> 01:03:07,909 All because they... 1063 01:03:10,203 --> 01:03:13,330 they just can't... breathe 1064 01:03:13,331 --> 01:03:15,291 my suffocating attempt 1065 01:03:16,626 --> 01:03:19,337 to prove Mom and Dad wrong. 1066 01:03:24,592 --> 01:03:25,677 You know, I think... 1067 01:03:27,428 --> 01:03:30,347 I think tonight should've been, like, 1068 01:03:30,348 --> 01:03:32,058 the worst night of my life. 1069 01:03:36,312 --> 01:03:37,313 But it isn't. 1070 01:03:42,443 --> 01:03:43,444 Ditto. 1071 01:03:46,114 --> 01:03:47,365 Baby, you're so wet. 1072 01:03:53,913 --> 01:03:56,708 God, you're so hard! Ow! 1073 01:04:01,004 --> 01:04:02,337 At least they're having fun. 1074 01:04:02,338 --> 01:04:03,882 Oh, shit! 1075 01:04:05,800 --> 01:04:06,801 It's kinda loud. 1076 01:04:09,179 --> 01:04:10,180 Yeah, it's too loud. 1077 01:04:10,513 --> 01:04:11,556 Shut the fuck up! 1078 01:04:12,348 --> 01:04:15,017 - Shut up! Shut the fuck up. - Quiet down! 1079 01:04:15,018 --> 01:04:17,227 - Samm! I'm coming! - Oh, God! 1080 01:04:17,228 --> 01:04:19,856 - I'm coming! - Shut up! Shut up! 1081 01:04:42,044 --> 01:04:45,422 Holy shit. Someone call 911! 1082 01:04:50,469 --> 01:04:51,470 Fuck! 1083 01:04:58,227 --> 01:04:59,228 Please, no! 1084 01:05:38,976 --> 01:05:40,476 What are you-- Hey, Ally. 1085 01:05:40,477 --> 01:05:41,978 - What are you doing? - Wait. 1086 01:05:41,979 --> 01:05:43,856 Wait for what? He's gonna kill us. 1087 01:05:44,731 --> 01:05:46,316 And if he doesn't kill us, 1088 01:05:47,192 --> 01:05:48,943 he's gonna keep killing people. 1089 01:05:48,944 --> 01:05:50,237 We brought him here, 1090 01:05:51,822 --> 01:05:52,823 we end it here. 1091 01:05:53,365 --> 01:05:54,783 - We-- - Come on. 1092 01:05:55,617 --> 01:05:57,119 I thought we were a team. 1093 01:06:39,286 --> 01:06:40,996 Hey, Fuck Eyes! 1094 01:06:44,500 --> 01:06:45,542 Wait, wait, wait. 1095 01:06:46,460 --> 01:06:47,461 We need a weapon. 1096 01:06:48,587 --> 01:06:49,588 I have this. 1097 01:06:50,464 --> 01:06:52,174 That is not a weapon. 1098 01:06:55,010 --> 01:06:56,011 That could work. 1099 01:07:02,434 --> 01:07:04,520 - I don't think I can do that. - What? Hey... 1100 01:07:04,978 --> 01:07:05,979 Yes, you can. 1101 01:07:07,022 --> 01:07:08,023 Come on. 1102 01:07:25,415 --> 01:07:26,416 Run! 1103 01:07:29,837 --> 01:07:30,838 Ally! 1104 01:08:04,288 --> 01:08:05,455 Oh, shit! 1105 01:08:20,929 --> 01:08:22,471 Thanks a lot, Jay. 1106 01:08:22,848 --> 01:08:23,849 What? 1107 01:08:25,184 --> 01:08:26,684 You got it in my mouth. 1108 01:08:26,685 --> 01:08:28,059 I just saved your life. 1109 01:08:28,060 --> 01:08:29,896 Oh, my God. I think I'm gonna be sick. 1110 01:08:29,897 --> 01:08:31,023 No. Hey. 1111 01:08:31,940 --> 01:08:32,983 Oh, no, no, no. 1112 01:08:41,324 --> 01:08:43,367 I told you I was not good with blood. 1113 01:08:43,368 --> 01:08:44,578 Yeah, no kidding. 1114 01:09:04,890 --> 01:09:06,516 Uh, who the fuck is that? 1115 01:09:07,559 --> 01:09:08,852 I have no idea. 1116 01:09:15,067 --> 01:09:16,859 He's lost a lot of blood here. 1117 01:09:17,986 --> 01:09:19,529 Do you have an ID on the victim? 1118 01:09:20,029 --> 01:09:22,491 You two, you're gonna be famous. 1119 01:09:23,033 --> 01:09:25,743 The couple that stopped Heart Eyes. I-- 1120 01:09:28,788 --> 01:09:30,040 It's very cute. 1121 01:09:30,998 --> 01:09:32,207 Thank-- Thank-- Thank you. 1122 01:09:32,208 --> 01:09:33,669 - Thank you. - Thank you. 1123 01:09:34,461 --> 01:09:35,921 I'm gonna leave you alone now. 1124 01:09:43,470 --> 01:09:44,846 Shot in the dark here. 1125 01:09:46,265 --> 01:09:47,557 Wanna come back to my hotel 1126 01:09:47,558 --> 01:09:50,185 and try and crack this campaign before my flight? 1127 01:09:52,354 --> 01:09:54,189 Just actually eat some dinner. 1128 01:09:54,773 --> 01:09:56,608 Order a whole bunch of room service. 1129 01:09:59,528 --> 01:10:00,571 Um... 1130 01:10:02,239 --> 01:10:04,366 Jay, I can't. 1131 01:10:12,374 --> 01:10:13,417 Hey, you two. 1132 01:10:17,045 --> 01:10:19,590 Just wanted to make sure you both got home safe. 1133 01:10:20,174 --> 01:10:21,466 Either of you need a lift? 1134 01:10:22,092 --> 01:10:24,761 Um... Actually... 1135 01:10:26,638 --> 01:10:28,639 I don't suppose you have a phone, 1136 01:10:28,640 --> 01:10:30,016 just so I can call a cab? 1137 01:10:30,017 --> 01:10:32,143 No, don't be silly. I'll give you a ride home. 1138 01:10:32,144 --> 01:10:33,853 Least I can do. 1139 01:10:33,854 --> 01:10:35,189 Your chariot awaits. 1140 01:10:36,523 --> 01:10:37,774 Okay. 1141 01:10:42,863 --> 01:10:43,989 Work call later? 1142 01:10:46,408 --> 01:10:47,576 Sounds like a plan. 1143 01:10:51,622 --> 01:10:53,956 Hey, uh, does anyone have a pen? 1144 01:10:53,957 --> 01:10:55,459 - I got you, dude. - Okay. 1145 01:10:57,878 --> 01:10:58,879 Can I see that? 1146 01:11:06,512 --> 01:11:07,930 That's me. 1147 01:11:11,433 --> 01:11:12,851 Your chariot awaits. 1148 01:11:22,486 --> 01:11:23,862 She's not my type. 1149 01:11:42,089 --> 01:11:44,340 Hey, I got another call, 1150 01:11:44,341 --> 01:11:46,467 so I'm just gonna have to take that 1151 01:11:46,468 --> 01:11:48,220 and that too. 1152 01:12:01,817 --> 01:12:03,443 Hey, do you need a ride? 1153 01:12:40,480 --> 01:12:41,480 Hey. 1154 01:12:41,481 --> 01:12:43,441 Um, do you have something you wanna tell me? 1155 01:12:43,442 --> 01:12:45,067 Oh, you're never gonna believe what happened. 1156 01:12:45,068 --> 01:12:46,694 Hello, Heart Eyes? Are you kidding me? 1157 01:12:46,695 --> 01:12:47,987 But wait. Are you okay? 1158 01:12:47,988 --> 01:12:49,447 Tell me the truth. Do you need to come over? 1159 01:12:49,448 --> 01:12:50,782 You can sleep in Arthur's panic room. 1160 01:12:52,993 --> 01:12:54,703 No, I-- I hate this feeling. 1161 01:12:55,621 --> 01:12:56,622 What feeling? 1162 01:12:58,332 --> 01:12:59,500 Liking someone. 1163 01:13:00,667 --> 01:13:02,127 God, I fucked up. 1164 01:13:03,170 --> 01:13:04,295 I fucked up, Mon. 1165 01:13:04,296 --> 01:13:06,547 I met a really, really great guy, 1166 01:13:06,548 --> 01:13:07,716 and now he's gone. 1167 01:13:10,719 --> 01:13:11,720 Where is he? 1168 01:13:12,346 --> 01:13:13,638 At the airport. 1169 01:13:13,639 --> 01:13:15,890 Oh. Okay, great. He's at the airport. Go get him. 1170 01:13:15,891 --> 01:13:16,974 Mon, I-- 1171 01:13:16,975 --> 01:13:19,811 Hey, Ally. Ally, listen to me. 1172 01:13:20,395 --> 01:13:21,854 You deserve to be happy. 1173 01:13:21,855 --> 01:13:24,023 You deserve to have someone love you 1174 01:13:24,024 --> 01:13:27,277 for the beautiful, neurotic mess that you are. 1175 01:13:28,195 --> 01:13:30,238 I mean, you can be so clueless sometimes. 1176 01:13:30,239 --> 01:13:32,740 It's one of the ten things I hate about you, honestly. 1177 01:13:32,741 --> 01:13:35,409 You can't let Jay go off to his best friend's wedding 1178 01:13:35,410 --> 01:13:37,036 and hook up with a bunch of bridesmaids 1179 01:13:37,037 --> 01:13:38,539 and move to Notting Hill. No. 1180 01:13:39,081 --> 01:13:40,415 This is love, mama. 1181 01:13:41,083 --> 01:13:43,626 Some kind of wonderful, 1182 01:13:43,627 --> 01:13:46,964 crazy, stupid love, actually. 1183 01:13:48,924 --> 01:13:51,801 Go get him. Go get that beautiful, melanin man. 1184 01:13:51,802 --> 01:13:53,052 - Okay! - He's gorgeous! 1185 01:13:53,053 --> 01:13:54,178 - Oh, my God. - Ally, go! 1186 01:13:54,179 --> 01:13:55,763 - You go get him right now! - Okay. I'm going. 1187 01:13:55,764 --> 01:13:57,182 I love you! You're beautiful! 1188 01:13:59,518 --> 01:14:01,811 This is your final call for all passengers 1189 01:14:01,812 --> 01:14:04,314 on flight 403 to Boston. 1190 01:14:06,608 --> 01:14:07,734 Thank you. 1191 01:14:09,611 --> 01:14:10,611 Jay? 1192 01:14:10,612 --> 01:14:12,238 Please have your boarding pass... 1193 01:14:12,239 --> 01:14:13,990 - Jay! - ...and identification ready. 1194 01:14:13,991 --> 01:14:15,075 Thank you. 1195 01:14:19,121 --> 01:14:20,122 Jay? 1196 01:14:22,499 --> 01:14:23,875 - Jay! - Fuck! 1197 01:14:23,876 --> 01:14:24,960 Sorry. 1198 01:14:28,255 --> 01:14:29,256 Jay! 1199 01:14:32,342 --> 01:14:33,676 Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 1200 01:14:33,677 --> 01:14:35,304 I thought you were somebody else. 1201 01:14:35,888 --> 01:14:38,264 Paging passengers Mr. and Mrs. Jones 1202 01:14:38,265 --> 01:14:39,515 flying to Denver... 1203 01:14:39,516 --> 01:14:41,017 - Sorry. - ...on flight 273. 1204 01:14:41,018 --> 01:14:43,519 Your flight is boarded and ready for departure. 1205 01:14:43,520 --> 01:14:44,937 Please make your way 1206 01:14:44,938 --> 01:14:47,523 to gate lounge 11 immediately. 1207 01:14:47,524 --> 01:14:49,650 - Hello? - Roses are red, 1208 01:14:49,651 --> 01:14:51,694 violets are black. 1209 01:14:51,695 --> 01:14:53,321 Guess who's with me 1210 01:14:53,322 --> 01:14:55,448 and not coming back? 1211 01:14:55,449 --> 01:14:56,533 Who is this? 1212 01:14:58,076 --> 01:14:59,328 We've met before. 1213 01:14:59,828 --> 01:15:00,995 Forget me not. 1214 01:15:00,996 --> 01:15:02,955 Ally! Ally! No! 1215 01:15:02,956 --> 01:15:04,999 Don't-- Do not-- 1216 01:15:05,000 --> 01:15:06,710 St. Valentine's Chapel. 1217 01:15:07,419 --> 01:15:09,378 Come alone or he dies. 1218 01:15:09,379 --> 01:15:10,464 Okay. 1219 01:15:11,048 --> 01:15:13,634 Call for help, he dies. 1220 01:15:14,259 --> 01:15:15,928 Okay. Just please don't hurt him. 1221 01:15:17,346 --> 01:15:19,306 That's up to you, sweetheart. 1222 01:16:04,184 --> 01:16:06,520 They say love is blind 1223 01:16:07,437 --> 01:16:10,023 and lovers cannot see, 1224 01:16:12,985 --> 01:16:17,239 the pretty follies that they themselves commit. 1225 01:16:19,074 --> 01:16:22,244 But love isn't blind... 1226 01:16:30,460 --> 01:16:31,461 is it? 1227 01:16:32,713 --> 01:16:33,839 Wait, you're-- 1228 01:16:35,174 --> 01:16:36,175 It's me. 1229 01:16:38,510 --> 01:16:39,511 David. 1230 01:16:44,433 --> 01:16:45,559 The IT guy. 1231 01:16:46,852 --> 01:16:48,937 Wait, who the fuck did we kill then? 1232 01:16:50,272 --> 01:16:51,315 Eli. 1233 01:16:51,815 --> 01:16:53,984 Poor, stupid Eli. 1234 01:16:54,443 --> 01:16:55,985 You guys were a couple? 1235 01:16:55,986 --> 01:16:57,362 Couple? No. No. 1236 01:16:59,823 --> 01:17:00,824 Throuple. 1237 01:17:04,620 --> 01:17:07,331 Love looks with eyes wide open. 1238 01:17:09,124 --> 01:17:11,543 Seeking what the heart desires the most. 1239 01:17:13,462 --> 01:17:14,463 A partner. 1240 01:17:15,923 --> 01:17:17,466 Its true companion. 1241 01:17:22,888 --> 01:17:25,599 I found mine ten years ago in a chat room. 1242 01:17:27,226 --> 01:17:28,601 David saw me. 1243 01:17:28,602 --> 01:17:30,311 He understood me 1244 01:17:30,312 --> 01:17:32,147 and I understood him. 1245 01:17:39,488 --> 01:17:40,697 We got married here. 1246 01:17:41,698 --> 01:17:44,243 You know, I didn't really take you for the religious type. 1247 01:17:45,577 --> 01:17:48,497 No. We just like the story. 1248 01:17:51,667 --> 01:17:53,126 Saint Valentine... 1249 01:17:55,838 --> 01:17:57,089 was beheaded. 1250 01:18:00,551 --> 01:18:02,469 You murdered innocent people. 1251 01:18:03,929 --> 01:18:05,931 - Share what you love. - Share what you love. 1252 01:18:08,225 --> 01:18:11,311 And we love hunting, killing... 1253 01:18:12,521 --> 01:18:13,647 Deceit. 1254 01:18:14,481 --> 01:18:16,525 Taking turns on our victims. 1255 01:18:18,151 --> 01:18:19,444 Murdering couples. 1256 01:18:23,031 --> 01:18:24,491 - It's our kink. - It's our kink. 1257 01:18:25,868 --> 01:18:27,786 Everybody's got a fetish. 1258 01:18:32,791 --> 01:18:35,459 Well, too bad we wasted your boyfriend at the drive-in. 1259 01:18:35,460 --> 01:18:38,380 Oh, God. He wasn't our boyfriend. 1260 01:18:38,797 --> 01:18:41,799 No, Eli was just a stupid fanboy. 1261 01:18:41,800 --> 01:18:43,467 He was obsessed with us. 1262 01:18:43,468 --> 01:18:44,719 He was obsessed with me. 1263 01:18:44,720 --> 01:18:46,430 Yeah. Learned a lot from me. 1264 01:18:47,431 --> 01:18:48,432 It just got messy. 1265 01:18:49,183 --> 01:18:50,308 Fuck! 1266 01:18:50,309 --> 01:18:51,643 I almost got you at home. 1267 01:18:52,477 --> 01:18:53,478 Go, go, go, go! 1268 01:18:54,855 --> 01:18:56,440 - I killed your driver. - ...lovebirds. 1269 01:18:57,316 --> 01:18:58,524 No, no, no! You've got the wrong people. 1270 01:18:58,525 --> 01:18:59,609 What are you-- 1271 01:18:59,610 --> 01:19:02,946 And I had a blast wasting those vile dickheads at the winery. 1272 01:19:05,240 --> 01:19:07,201 Ooh! That reminds me. 1273 01:19:08,202 --> 01:19:09,744 - Huh. - Found this. 1274 01:19:09,745 --> 01:19:13,498 God, you're the fucking best. 1275 01:19:13,499 --> 01:19:14,999 Isn't she the fucking best? 1276 01:19:15,000 --> 01:19:16,083 Yeah, I know. 1277 01:19:16,084 --> 01:19:17,794 And as luck would have it, 1278 01:19:19,004 --> 01:19:20,213 your initials match. 1279 01:19:20,214 --> 01:19:22,883 J. Shaw. 1280 01:19:23,342 --> 01:19:26,261 Jeanine Shaw, bitch. 1281 01:19:27,513 --> 01:19:29,847 Why us? We're not even a couple. 1282 01:19:29,848 --> 01:19:32,226 Just let him go! Let him go! 1283 01:19:33,101 --> 01:19:34,352 Truth be told, 1284 01:19:34,353 --> 01:19:36,980 we were gonna kill the other couple at the restaurant. 1285 01:19:38,398 --> 01:19:39,399 But then... 1286 01:19:40,776 --> 01:19:43,320 - we saw that kiss. - That kiss! God! 1287 01:19:44,029 --> 01:19:47,115 Your chemistry is undeniable. 1288 01:20:01,880 --> 01:20:05,007 Well, I didn't know that murder was a love language. 1289 01:20:05,008 --> 01:20:06,093 Try it. 1290 01:20:06,927 --> 01:20:08,178 Maybe you'll like it. 1291 01:20:13,809 --> 01:20:15,018 Pick it up. 1292 01:20:16,937 --> 01:20:17,938 Pick it up. 1293 01:20:19,106 --> 01:20:21,148 There's a single bullet in that chamber 1294 01:20:21,149 --> 01:20:23,652 with one single choice, him or you. 1295 01:20:33,120 --> 01:20:34,745 We may have mistaken you for lovers 1296 01:20:34,746 --> 01:20:37,624 at the beginning of the night, but can you prove us right? 1297 01:20:38,333 --> 01:20:40,168 Could you save his life with yours, 1298 01:20:40,169 --> 01:20:43,547 thus proving that love really does conquer all? 1299 01:20:45,424 --> 01:20:47,926 If you don't love him, kill him. 1300 01:20:49,303 --> 01:20:50,637 And you're free to go. 1301 01:20:54,433 --> 01:20:55,434 Wow. 1302 01:20:58,145 --> 01:21:00,856 You know, your dedication is impressive. 1303 01:21:03,609 --> 01:21:04,985 It's twisted as fuck, but-- 1304 01:21:10,490 --> 01:21:11,658 Jay. 1305 01:21:14,745 --> 01:21:17,956 I've spent so long running from love. 1306 01:21:20,542 --> 01:21:22,461 Convinced it would destroy me. 1307 01:21:30,219 --> 01:21:31,970 I don't wanna be that person anymore. 1308 01:21:36,892 --> 01:21:38,685 I want the storybook thing. 1309 01:21:45,776 --> 01:21:48,320 It was just one single night... 1310 01:21:52,449 --> 01:21:54,284 but I fell hard for you, Jay. 1311 01:22:03,627 --> 01:22:06,838 No, no, no. Don't do that. 1312 01:22:06,839 --> 01:22:08,714 No! No, hey. 1313 01:22:08,715 --> 01:22:10,466 Hey. Hey, no. 1314 01:22:10,467 --> 01:22:12,845 - No, no! Ally! - Forgive me. 1315 01:22:24,314 --> 01:22:25,691 Baby, no! 1316 01:22:26,775 --> 01:22:28,067 - Come on. - Oh, you shot me. 1317 01:22:28,068 --> 01:22:30,069 Sorry, I overcorrected. 1318 01:22:30,070 --> 01:22:31,488 That's a lucky fucking shot. 1319 01:22:39,538 --> 01:22:41,915 Ally, did you mean what you said? 1320 01:22:43,083 --> 01:22:44,084 Come on. 1321 01:22:44,710 --> 01:22:46,003 Pookie. 1322 01:22:46,837 --> 01:22:48,296 Chop that pretty boy up. 1323 01:22:48,297 --> 01:22:49,922 I'm gonna have fun with this one. 1324 01:22:49,923 --> 01:22:52,174 - No. No. - Oh, yes, Mommy. 1325 01:22:52,175 --> 01:22:55,303 No! No! Don't you fucking touch him! No! 1326 01:22:56,512 --> 01:22:57,513 No! 1327 01:22:58,181 --> 01:22:59,182 No! 1328 01:23:03,269 --> 01:23:05,021 You shouldn't have shot me, bitch. 1329 01:23:14,655 --> 01:23:15,740 Hey, hey, come on. 1330 01:23:16,866 --> 01:23:18,034 Look at her go. 1331 01:23:21,787 --> 01:23:23,748 Oh, you don't wanna miss this, do you? 1332 01:23:24,582 --> 01:23:26,124 Isn't she perfect? 1333 01:23:26,125 --> 01:23:27,376 You talk too much. 1334 01:23:44,519 --> 01:23:46,395 I'm gonna fucking kill you both. 1335 01:24:00,910 --> 01:24:02,119 You watching, Jay? 1336 01:24:03,496 --> 01:24:05,248 I want you to see her die. 1337 01:24:10,795 --> 01:24:12,255 Love hurts, bitch. 1338 01:25:36,172 --> 01:25:37,715 Your day fucking sucks. 1339 01:25:42,345 --> 01:25:43,346 Jay. 1340 01:25:44,180 --> 01:25:45,306 Jay. Hey. 1341 01:25:46,057 --> 01:25:47,058 Hey. 1342 01:25:47,892 --> 01:25:48,893 Hi, you. 1343 01:25:49,268 --> 01:25:50,269 Hey. 1344 01:25:55,358 --> 01:25:57,693 I think you got over your fear of blood. 1345 01:25:59,904 --> 01:26:01,279 I'm gonna kill you. 1346 01:26:01,280 --> 01:26:03,074 I'll fucking kill you. 1347 01:26:03,574 --> 01:26:05,117 I'm gonna fucking kill you. 1348 01:26:18,756 --> 01:26:19,841 Planet saved. 1349 01:26:22,009 --> 01:26:23,219 Planet saved. 1350 01:26:49,036 --> 01:26:51,955 Now, if you told me that, a year ago, 1351 01:26:51,956 --> 01:26:55,917 I'd be drinking to the highest recorded sales 1352 01:26:55,918 --> 01:26:58,003 in Crystal Cane history, I'd say, 1353 01:26:58,004 --> 01:27:00,755 "Y'all just a lying sack of hot trash." 1354 01:27:00,756 --> 01:27:03,593 But... here we are. 1355 01:27:04,886 --> 01:27:08,472 And it's all thanks to these two marketing mavens. 1356 01:27:12,059 --> 01:27:14,103 Right here. These two. 1357 01:27:15,146 --> 01:27:17,063 Now, Ally. I am, 1358 01:27:17,064 --> 01:27:18,815 believe it or not, mildly devastated 1359 01:27:18,816 --> 01:27:20,526 that this is your last day. 1360 01:27:21,068 --> 01:27:23,904 But I am proud of you for going, pursuing your dreams, 1361 01:27:23,905 --> 01:27:25,697 going back to doctor school. 1362 01:27:25,698 --> 01:27:28,158 All told, I really do hope that you're better with a needle 1363 01:27:28,159 --> 01:27:29,785 than you are with a pitch deck! 1364 01:27:32,580 --> 01:27:33,872 To success! 1365 01:27:33,873 --> 01:27:35,749 - To success! - To success. 1366 01:27:35,750 --> 01:27:36,834 Wait. 1367 01:27:38,461 --> 01:27:39,462 To love. 1368 01:27:46,552 --> 01:27:47,553 Hey, baby. 1369 01:27:48,137 --> 01:27:49,138 Hi. 1370 01:27:50,097 --> 01:27:51,139 What did I miss? 1371 01:27:51,140 --> 01:27:53,308 Hey, do you think it's weird having a date here 1372 01:27:53,309 --> 01:27:55,101 after everything that happened? 1373 01:27:55,102 --> 01:27:56,479 Nope. Not to me. 1374 01:27:57,355 --> 01:27:59,857 This is where I realized that I was in love with you. 1375 01:28:00,191 --> 01:28:02,526 So, feels symbolic. 1376 01:28:02,527 --> 01:28:04,153 Okay. Symbolic? 1377 01:28:04,779 --> 01:28:06,030 You think it's symb-- 1378 01:28:07,240 --> 01:28:09,908 Listen, don't freak out. Don't freak out. 1379 01:28:09,909 --> 01:28:12,370 I know stuff like this can freak you out, but... 1380 01:28:15,206 --> 01:28:17,333 Ally, this has been the best year of my life. 1381 01:28:19,585 --> 01:28:20,586 So... 1382 01:28:22,588 --> 01:28:24,090 will you move in with me? 1383 01:28:33,391 --> 01:28:34,392 Jay, I-- 1384 01:28:36,519 --> 01:28:37,728 I don't know what to say. 1385 01:28:39,063 --> 01:28:41,815 Yeah, no. I--I know where that's going. 1386 01:28:41,816 --> 01:28:43,191 - It's okay. - No, I-- 1387 01:28:43,192 --> 01:28:44,443 I don't want a key. 1388 01:28:47,113 --> 01:28:48,114 I don't want a key. 1389 01:28:52,535 --> 01:28:53,536 I want you. 1390 01:29:07,425 --> 01:29:08,676 Jay Simmonds... 1391 01:29:11,512 --> 01:29:12,638 will you marry me? 1392 01:29:24,066 --> 01:29:25,067 Yes. 1393 01:29:26,027 --> 01:29:27,611 - Yes? - Yes. Yes. 1394 01:29:27,612 --> 01:29:31,032 A million fucking times, yes. 1395 01:31:24,770 --> 01:31:25,770 Hello? 1396 01:31:25,771 --> 01:31:27,105 Roses are red, 1397 01:31:27,106 --> 01:31:28,983 violets are blue. 1398 01:31:30,067 --> 01:31:33,112 Guess who just took a picture of you? 1399 01:31:33,821 --> 01:31:34,822 Who is this? 1400 01:31:36,073 --> 01:31:37,282 Relax, bitch. 1401 01:31:37,283 --> 01:31:38,366 Too soon? 1402 01:31:38,367 --> 01:31:40,327 Monica, that's not funny! 1403 01:31:40,328 --> 01:31:41,913 Where even are you? 1404 01:31:42,788 --> 01:31:43,788 Did you get it? 1405 01:31:43,789 --> 01:31:45,290 Of course, I got it. Are you kidding me? 1406 01:31:45,291 --> 01:31:46,374 You look super cute. 1407 01:31:46,375 --> 01:31:47,959 I mean, I would have gotten a manicure, 1408 01:31:47,960 --> 01:31:49,586 but I told you that, and you're fine with that. 1409 01:31:49,587 --> 01:31:51,713 You're a natural gal. You look great. 1410 01:31:51,714 --> 01:31:55,468 Okay, enjoy the movie, fiancés. Love you. 1411 01:31:57,261 --> 01:31:59,138 Ally? Hello? 98105