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1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,469
Previously on Z Nation...
2
00:00:03,103 --> 00:00:05,402
Made it myself. I
call it the Z Whacker.
3
00:00:05,472 --> 00:00:07,498
Well, slap my ass
and call me Sally,
4
00:00:07,574 --> 00:00:09,042
if it ain't Sketchy McClain.
5
00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:12,506
She's not Cassandra.
6
00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:14,339
Not anymore.
7
00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:18,042
That didn't sound good.
8
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:26,019
Where's Cassandra?
10K: I mercied her.
9
00:00:26,393 --> 00:00:27,918
I gave her life.
10
00:00:27,995 --> 00:00:29,987
And you had no
right to take that away.
11
00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:04,374
Hi there, fellows.
12
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,196
A healthy grill
is a healthy man.
13
00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:08,901
From the air we breathe
to the kisses we impart,
14
00:01:08,969 --> 00:01:11,996
it is our buccal cavity that
separates us from the plants.
15
00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:16,837
It is incumbent upon us,
therefore, to service its gatekeepers.
16
00:01:18,845 --> 00:01:21,110
Gentlemen, good day.
17
00:01:24,151 --> 00:01:25,151
My name is Rollie.
18
00:01:25,218 --> 00:01:26,777
This is my colleague Cornelius.
19
00:01:27,020 --> 00:01:29,420
Gentlemen, when was the last
time you had your teeth cleaned?
20
00:01:29,856 --> 00:01:32,325
Times are never too
desperate for self-improvement.
21
00:01:32,526 --> 00:01:34,051
We accept donations.
22
00:01:34,194 --> 00:01:35,719
Food, water, gas,
bullets, batteries.
23
00:01:35,796 --> 00:01:37,287
We also accept smiles.
24
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:41,796
Please, enjoy the
seated experience.
25
00:01:41,868 --> 00:01:42,868
Ah?
26
00:01:55,382 --> 00:01:56,382
Up you go.
27
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:03,967
Well, you look like you still
have some large, capable teeth.
28
00:02:03,991 --> 00:02:05,050
That's great news.
29
00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:07,260
How often would
you say you floss?
30
00:02:07,327 --> 00:02:11,264
This simple daily ritual can add
years of happiness and productivity.
31
00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:15,399
A healthy mouth is
32
00:02:17,704 --> 00:02:19,366
a healthy life.
33
00:03:06,887 --> 00:03:10,153
Well, the Mississippi sure
ain't as mighty as it used to be.
34
00:03:10,557 --> 00:03:12,856
We can move faster
on river than on foot.
35
00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:15,653
We could take this south to
Memphis and then head west.
36
00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:18,393
Can't we find another one?
37
00:03:19,232 --> 00:03:20,232
No.
38
00:03:28,175 --> 00:03:29,473
You wanna help us out?
39
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:30,876
No, I don't.
40
00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:34,077
By the way, I can't swim.
41
00:03:37,584 --> 00:03:40,349
Whoa, whoa. Easy! I
don't want any trouble.
42
00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:41,420
What are you doing here?
43
00:03:41,488 --> 00:03:42,922
It's my boat.
44
00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:44,785
Makes sense.
45
00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:45,858
It's ours now.
46
00:03:45,926 --> 00:03:47,224
What the hell?
Now wait a minute.
47
00:03:47,294 --> 00:03:49,160
I don't like this deal.
Can we negotiate?
48
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,720
Hey, listen.
49
00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:53,062
Listen, this boat
ain't easy to operate.
50
00:03:53,133 --> 00:03:56,126
Well, plus, I know the
river. The channel patterns.
51
00:03:56,269 --> 00:03:57,396
I'd make a great asset.
52
00:03:57,938 --> 00:03:59,668
Forget it. You talk too much.
53
00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:02,605
No, no, no, no,
listen. I can keep quiet.
54
00:04:02,676 --> 00:04:04,304
You won't hear a peep.
55
00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:06,706
Can you take us
south to Memphis?
56
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:07,973
Well, hell yes.
57
00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:10,116
Let's go.
58
00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:13,611
I'll take you to the Gortner
Bridge, just north of the city.
59
00:04:13,687 --> 00:04:16,156
Road block on the east
side keeps things pretty quiet.
60
00:04:16,223 --> 00:04:17,691
After that, where
are you headed?
61
00:04:17,758 --> 00:04:18,885
East, west? Shut up.
62
00:04:18,959 --> 00:04:20,291
Sure thing.
63
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,440
Nothing worse than a
blabbermouth that won't shut up.
64
00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:24,963
It's kinda like
back in the before.
65
00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:26,556
I had this brother-in-law...
66
00:04:26,633 --> 00:04:27,862
Does this thing actually run?
67
00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:28,993
Well, I...
68
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:31,004
I swear it ran as
soon as yesterday.
69
00:04:31,071 --> 00:04:32,505
10K, check the motor.
70
00:04:33,406 --> 00:04:34,874
Oh, thank you, young man.
71
00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:36,773
Yeah, I got a
stinger in my neck.
72
00:04:36,843 --> 00:04:38,778
A lot of weakness in
my upper extremities.
73
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:25,224
Hey, I think I know those dudes.
74
00:05:29,563 --> 00:05:30,963
Oh, my God. Is that...
75
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:33,197
Sketchy and Skeezy?
76
00:05:33,266 --> 00:05:34,266
Hey, slow down, man.
77
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,334
Slowing down.
78
00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:36,445
Hey, we're not slowing down.
79
00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:37,869
Yeah. For once I agree with him.
80
00:05:38,038 --> 00:05:39,062
Aye-aye, sir.
81
00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:40,316
Do what I tell you
and slow down.
82
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:41,340
Those are my friends.
83
00:05:42,309 --> 00:05:44,210
Is that really necessary?
84
00:05:44,911 --> 00:05:46,004
Let's check it out.
85
00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:47,613
Mistake.
86
00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:49,639
Never get off the boat.
87
00:05:52,252 --> 00:05:53,481
Doc!
88
00:05:53,553 --> 00:05:55,112
Well, I'll be damned!
89
00:05:55,488 --> 00:05:58,151
Well, if it ain't Tweedledee
and Tweedledumbass.
90
00:05:58,325 --> 00:06:00,385
Oh, man. Your
guys' timing is perfect.
91
00:06:00,460 --> 00:06:01,587
What happened to him?
92
00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:03,663
He fell in with the wrong crowd.
93
00:06:04,297 --> 00:06:06,926
Hey, kid! You still shooting
out the lights? Yeah.
94
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,866
Great. Help us with
this gear, will ya?
95
00:06:08,935 --> 00:06:10,426
You're not bringing
that on board.
96
00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:12,232
Sir, with all due respect,
97
00:06:12,305 --> 00:06:15,469
this is valuable booty worth
about four weeks of road time.
98
00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:16,840
You get one.
99
00:06:18,845 --> 00:06:19,922
All right, we're
taking this one.
100
00:06:19,946 --> 00:06:21,224
Well, what about the
salt and pepper shakers?
101
00:06:21,248 --> 00:06:22,358
I think they're in this one.
102
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,577
Now or never, boys.
103
00:06:24,484 --> 00:06:27,454
Just so happens you
caught us on the upswing.
104
00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:30,623
Long gestating plans
have been percolating
105
00:06:30,690 --> 00:06:32,420
and coming into
fruition all at once.
106
00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:34,759
It's been a pretty
good season for us.
107
00:06:35,462 --> 00:06:37,658
Where the hell'd
you find all that stuff?
108
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:39,996
Oh, yeah, we stayed
in Memphis for a bit.
109
00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:42,501
Happened by a little bitty
place. Maybe you've heard of it.
110
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:43,901
Former home of the King.
111
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,331
You looted Graceland?
112
00:06:46,439 --> 00:06:47,930
Oh, we cleaned the place out.
113
00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:50,374
We had a couple of truckloads
of authentic Elvis swag
114
00:06:50,443 --> 00:06:52,605
until we ran into a
little bit of trouble.
115
00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:54,944
Uh-huh, and if you were
all the way in Memphis,
116
00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:56,549
how was it that
you ended up here?
117
00:06:56,783 --> 00:06:59,014
Oh, 'cause we took a river
trail up north in Nebraska
118
00:06:59,252 --> 00:07:02,689
until we ran into some angry
Albanians who did not like us.
119
00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:05,024
Skeezy here damn
near lost a leg.
120
00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:06,091
What happened?
121
00:07:06,693 --> 00:07:07,973
They were gonna chop off my leg.
122
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:09,094
Damn.
123
00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:11,589
It was nothing a little bit
of discourse couldn't mend.
124
00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:16,265
We're all just animals
looking for a connection.
125
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:19,868
Oh, and plus, we got
them with "the Murphy."
126
00:07:22,008 --> 00:07:24,876
Excuse me? Yeah,
it's just this thing we do.
127
00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:26,846
It works 'cause of Skeezy's
passing resemblance.
128
00:07:27,647 --> 00:07:29,582
Resemblance? That so?
129
00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:32,779
And what exactly does
"the Murphy" look like?
130
00:07:33,687 --> 00:07:34,916
Over seven feet tall.
131
00:07:35,755 --> 00:07:38,247
Red eyes. Teeth
like a mountain goat.
132
00:07:38,558 --> 00:07:39,992
He walks around on all fours.
133
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,660
And he can blend into his
surroundings like a chameleon.
134
00:07:42,729 --> 00:07:45,130
Yeah, when we saw him in
Louisiana, he was green as moss.
135
00:07:45,198 --> 00:07:47,326
We saw him again a
week later in Texas,
136
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,868
and he looked like dirt.
137
00:07:49,736 --> 00:07:50,931
You don't say.
138
00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:52,404
And he's dangerous as all hell.
139
00:07:52,739 --> 00:07:55,174
I saw him turn a man
inside out using his mind.
140
00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:57,410
Literally. Guy's spleen just...
141
00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:59,036
Hanging out over his waistband.
142
00:07:59,112 --> 00:08:00,156
Most people don't understand.
143
00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:01,614
Oh, I understand.
144
00:08:01,681 --> 00:08:03,650
You two are a
couple of lying morons
145
00:08:03,717 --> 00:08:05,845
who spoiled a rather
pleasant boat ride.
146
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:07,279
I resent that.
147
00:08:07,354 --> 00:08:08,931
I've heard enough. I'm
throwing you both over.
148
00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,287
No, no, no. Whoa, take it easy.
149
00:08:10,357 --> 00:08:11,416
Come on. Come on, now.
150
00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:14,757
You can't throw us in. Look,
there's zombie jams downriver, okay?
151
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,319
It'd be like feeding
us to piranhas.
152
00:08:16,730 --> 00:08:18,290
Your stories just get
dumber and dumber.
153
00:08:18,531 --> 00:08:20,943
No, no, no, it's true. It's true.
All up and down the Mississippi.
154
00:08:20,967 --> 00:08:23,493
They start in Lake
Onalaska and they drift down.
155
00:08:23,570 --> 00:08:25,664
Boys. You're just
digging a deeper hole.
156
00:08:25,739 --> 00:08:27,435
I swear on my
mother's eyes, Doc.
157
00:08:30,543 --> 00:08:31,875
Zombie jam!
158
00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,848
I told you! Nobody
ever believes us!
159
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:41,412
Guess we woke them up.
160
00:08:50,797 --> 00:08:51,890
Zombies on board!
161
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:54,891
Bail out!
162
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:27,460
Doc!
163
00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:30,102
Warren!
164
00:09:59,365 --> 00:10:00,365
Where's your buddy?
165
00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:02,700
Curtains.
166
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:03,769
Saw him go down.
167
00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:08,071
He chose to sink while
you and I chose to swim.
168
00:10:08,141 --> 00:10:10,386
You know, they say that drowning
is actually a pretty good way to go,
169
00:10:10,410 --> 00:10:11,639
which I would hope for him.
170
00:10:11,711 --> 00:10:13,873
Even though he's a coward
for leaving me in the lurch.
171
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,210
You see my friends?
172
00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:16,281
They were swimming west.
173
00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:18,884
You saw this?
174
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:19,952
With my own eyes.
175
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:26,183
What about the blue guy?
176
00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:27,259
Sunk to the bottom.
177
00:10:27,660 --> 00:10:28,992
Are you positive?
178
00:10:29,062 --> 00:10:30,086
Oh, yeah.
179
00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:32,563
He's getting turned away at
the pearly gates right about now.
180
00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:34,299
Doc?
181
00:10:35,602 --> 00:10:37,161
Look, man, I can't
be sure. Okay?
182
00:10:38,338 --> 00:10:39,533
Hey, you make fire?
183
00:10:39,606 --> 00:10:40,606
Yeah.
184
00:10:40,673 --> 00:10:43,586
Well, you and I should stick together
for a bit, watch each other's backs.
185
00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:45,054
I mean, guys like
you in these parts...
186
00:10:45,078 --> 00:10:47,189
Ooh, you're gonna get taken
advantage of. You know what I mean?
187
00:10:47,213 --> 00:10:48,237
That's not gonna happen.
188
00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:49,714
Yeah, well, I'll
make sure it don't.
189
00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:51,244
What about you?
190
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,309
I won't touch you.
Can you make fire?
191
00:10:54,087 --> 00:10:55,180
Look, don't patronize me.
192
00:10:55,255 --> 00:10:57,156
I'm not playing little
games with you, boy.
193
00:10:57,223 --> 00:10:58,316
I am the fire!
194
00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:05,026
He's cut in half!
195
00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:06,728
Oh, dear Lord.
196
00:11:08,768 --> 00:11:10,532
I can't do it. I can't
do it. Mercy him.
197
00:11:10,603 --> 00:11:11,901
Whoa, wait, whoa, wait.
198
00:11:14,707 --> 00:11:15,970
Give him a warrior's death.
199
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,323
Hey! Cut it out!
Cut it out! Cut it out!
200
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:22,371
Come on. No, do it!
201
00:11:22,482 --> 00:11:24,280
Stop! I fell in a damn hole!
202
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,485
Oh. Get me outta here.
203
00:11:30,156 --> 00:11:31,756
I thought you said he chose...
204
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:32,917
Hey. Shut up, kid.
205
00:11:33,326 --> 00:11:34,419
What'd you say?
206
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:38,157
No, no, no, I said we need to find
my best friend and get out of here.
207
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,476
'Cause there's human
traffickers in these parts.
208
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:41,500
Oh, that's true actually.
209
00:11:42,569 --> 00:11:44,504
Hey, where you going,
kid? We just got here.
210
00:11:44,571 --> 00:11:46,369
I'm better off on my own.
211
00:11:46,439 --> 00:11:47,498
I need to find my friends.
212
00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:49,504
We're on the east
side of the Mississippi.
213
00:11:49,576 --> 00:11:51,636
As I recall, your friends
were heading west.
214
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,942
If they're alive,
and that's a big if,
215
00:11:54,013 --> 00:11:55,879
they ain't heading east.
216
00:11:55,949 --> 00:11:57,029
Then I'll find my way west.
217
00:11:57,116 --> 00:11:59,745
Now the only way west is
south of here, Gortner Bridge.
218
00:12:00,019 --> 00:12:01,530
Look, kid. You want
to find your friends,
219
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:02,874
come with us.
We're heading south.
220
00:12:03,189 --> 00:12:04,589
Safety in numbers.
Trust me on that.
221
00:12:05,358 --> 00:12:07,850
Walk life's journey
with us, young man.
222
00:12:07,927 --> 00:12:11,125
Learn the ways of the world from two
gentlemen who've been there, done that.
223
00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:13,029
Yeah. Besides, we'll
get you laid for sure.
224
00:12:14,667 --> 00:12:15,667
Ah!
225
00:12:16,336 --> 00:12:18,703
Okay, fine. We'll
let you come with us.
226
00:12:18,771 --> 00:12:20,371
You're in charge of
making fires, though.
227
00:12:25,511 --> 00:12:26,570
10K!
228
00:12:27,947 --> 00:12:29,415
10K!
229
00:12:30,516 --> 00:12:32,041
Kid! Can you hear us?
230
00:12:32,819 --> 00:12:34,583
Send a smoke signal!
231
00:12:37,123 --> 00:12:38,216
I'm going across.
232
00:12:38,291 --> 00:12:39,850
Doc, you won't make it.
233
00:12:39,926 --> 00:12:41,189
We have to get him.
234
00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:42,490
No. We don't.
235
00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:44,802
And what makes you think
he's on the other side, anyways?
236
00:12:45,031 --> 00:12:47,557
That kid's a survivor. He
ain't going out like that!
237
00:12:47,634 --> 00:12:50,035
Yeah. As romantic
as that sounds,
238
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:51,366
that is not much to go on.
239
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:52,997
Well, I don't care.
I'm going after him.
240
00:12:53,306 --> 00:12:55,451
That's the east side of the
Mississippi you're talking about.
241
00:12:55,475 --> 00:12:56,475
Yeah. So?
242
00:12:56,542 --> 00:12:57,874
I'm heading west. So is he.
243
00:12:58,044 --> 00:12:59,044
Oh, is that right?
244
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:00,512
Doc, you're not
going back in there.
245
00:13:00,847 --> 00:13:02,475
What are we gonna
do, Warren? Leave him?
246
00:13:02,548 --> 00:13:04,642
Hey, hey. We're
not gonna leave him.
247
00:13:05,251 --> 00:13:07,516
Look, he probably just
floated downstream, right?
248
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:09,614
So let's head south.
249
00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:11,123
We'll find a spot.
We'll camp out.
250
00:13:11,724 --> 00:13:13,764
There's only one
direction he could've gone.
251
00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:15,620
We'll stay on the river's edge.
252
00:13:15,695 --> 00:13:18,255
If he's on the other
side, he'll give us a signal.
253
00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:20,163
Hey, what about getting
Murphy to California?
254
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,202
Yeah. What about that?
255
00:13:22,268 --> 00:13:24,635
We'll put in 24 hours
of looking for him.
256
00:13:25,672 --> 00:13:26,901
And then we head west.
257
00:13:32,111 --> 00:13:33,791
It's like my daddy
always told me.
258
00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:35,678
Never trust an Eskimo
in a windbreaker.
259
00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:38,327
And he would know, 'cause
he was in the Merchant Marines.
260
00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:39,580
You boys lost?
261
00:13:40,353 --> 00:13:42,254
Uh, certainly not.
Matter of fact...
262
00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:43,322
Oh, no?
263
00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:45,984
'Cause either you lost
or you're trespassing.
264
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:47,854
Which one is it?
265
00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:50,172
Well, I was not aware they
had changed the property lines
266
00:13:50,196 --> 00:13:51,340
since the last time
we came through.
267
00:13:51,364 --> 00:13:52,423
Wasn't no last time.
268
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:54,364
'Cause I woulda recognized you.
269
00:13:54,434 --> 00:13:56,198
Well, I've been
growing my hair out. No.
270
00:13:56,269 --> 00:13:58,363
I'm pretty sure
you ain't from here.
271
00:13:58,438 --> 00:13:59,633
Am I right, Dale?
272
00:13:59,706 --> 00:14:01,334
Oh, pretty sure not.
273
00:14:01,874 --> 00:14:02,967
We were just on our... Oh.
274
00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:05,502
How 'bout emptying
them pockets first?
275
00:14:06,713 --> 00:14:10,946
Well, caught us on a slow
day, boys. Sorry to disappoint.
276
00:14:11,451 --> 00:14:13,147
Like he said. Hey,
what's the hurry?
277
00:14:13,219 --> 00:14:15,154
We got off onto
the wrong foot here.
278
00:14:15,221 --> 00:14:17,087
You obviously look
like intelligent men
279
00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:19,858
with an eye towards
progress in future generations.
280
00:14:20,093 --> 00:14:22,790
What if I told you
today's your lucky day?
281
00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:25,294
Oh, I would agree.
Ain't that right, Dale?
282
00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:26,833
Oh, you right 'bout that.
283
00:14:26,899 --> 00:14:28,128
You're both right.
284
00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:31,069
'Cause it ain't every day you come
in contact with a modern miracle.
285
00:14:32,839 --> 00:14:34,637
Your maker's been
smiling on you,
286
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:38,974
because today I offer you the
most rare and precious of currencies.
287
00:14:39,812 --> 00:14:41,440
Everlasting life.
288
00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:43,376
What's he talking about?
289
00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:47,750
Uh, well, uh, if you're
interested, we've got a...
290
00:14:47,820 --> 00:14:49,846
You got a stuttering
problem? Why, yes, he does.
291
00:14:49,922 --> 00:14:51,734
And he's actually very
self-conscious about it. So please...
292
00:14:51,758 --> 00:14:54,678
Let's just kill them. Well then, I guess
you've never heard of the Murphy.
293
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:57,075
All right, fine. You
don't want to see him.
294
00:14:57,230 --> 00:14:59,028
Oh, I've heard of
the Murphy, all right.
295
00:14:59,098 --> 00:15:00,098
Seen him, even.
296
00:15:00,266 --> 00:15:02,360
You've seen the Murphy,
huh? What's he look like?
297
00:15:02,802 --> 00:15:04,600
Uh, it's a taller fella.
298
00:15:04,871 --> 00:15:06,533
"Taller fella." Really?
299
00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:08,639
Taller fella, skinny
as a bean pole?
300
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:12,072
Short scraggly hair?
Dark blotches on his skin?
301
00:15:16,482 --> 00:15:18,383
Oh, it's him. I knew it.
302
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:19,984
- Wait a second.
- That's right.
303
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,277
You've got me.
304
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:24,290
If you're the Murphy, then
let me see you levitate.
305
00:15:24,357 --> 00:15:26,451
Oh, come on. Who said
he could levitate? He can!
306
00:15:26,692 --> 00:15:27,853
Not on an empty stomach.
307
00:15:28,227 --> 00:15:29,227
Wait, that's true?
308
00:15:29,295 --> 00:15:30,575
Well, I'll tell
you what is true.
309
00:15:31,531 --> 00:15:32,726
He can make you immortal.
310
00:15:33,733 --> 00:15:37,170
What's that? Reset your
odometer. Make you zombie-proof.
311
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:38,270
Zombie-proof?
312
00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:41,239
Prove it.
313
00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:44,586
As I said, it's no accident
we're through these parts.
314
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:45,737
We're wanderers.
315
00:15:45,812 --> 00:15:48,407
Trying to cure this wretched
land of disease and sin.
316
00:15:48,848 --> 00:15:50,316
One bite at a time.
317
00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:51,883
What do you mean, "bite"?
318
00:15:52,351 --> 00:15:53,375
I'm glad you ask.
319
00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:55,114
You wanna be immortal,
320
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:57,654
old Murphy here's
gotta bite you.
321
00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:01,723
But everything comes at a price.
322
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:04,754
And it looks like you got plenty to go
around in that there wagon of yours.
323
00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:08,800
Maybe not, but you
got to ask yourself
324
00:16:09,435 --> 00:16:11,336
how much is eternal
life worth to you?
325
00:16:14,207 --> 00:16:15,937
Hold him still, boys!
326
00:16:16,008 --> 00:16:17,704
If he moves too much,
it ain't gonna work.
327
00:16:17,777 --> 00:16:19,678
Why not? Uh, 'cause
the muscles tense up.
328
00:16:19,745 --> 00:16:21,611
It releases an acid that
counteracts the venom.
329
00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:23,749
Hold still, Dale! I'm trying!
330
00:16:23,883 --> 00:16:26,216
Close your eyes.
Think good thoughts.
331
00:16:29,222 --> 00:16:30,462
Just do it already! Just do it!
332
00:16:30,523 --> 00:16:31,547
You heard him!
333
00:16:32,258 --> 00:16:34,750
Ow! Ow! SKETCHY:
Hold still, Dale!
334
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:37,058
Hold still, Dale!
335
00:16:37,163 --> 00:16:38,495
Hold still!
336
00:16:39,098 --> 00:16:41,226
You're halfway to
a life of no worries!
337
00:16:41,601 --> 00:16:43,832
Hang on, Dale! Ride that bull!
338
00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:46,529
Ride that bull! Hang on, Dale!
339
00:16:49,909 --> 00:16:51,036
Son of a bitch.
340
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:54,312
Well, that's it!
341
00:16:55,915 --> 00:16:57,110
How do you feel?
342
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:02,521
I'm cured.
343
00:17:03,389 --> 00:17:04,389
I'm cured!
344
00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:08,018
Murphy! You all right?
345
00:17:10,096 --> 00:17:13,089
Takes a little bit out of
him every time. Who's next?
346
00:17:18,604 --> 00:17:20,266
We sure do appreciate this.
347
00:17:20,339 --> 00:17:21,339
Fair is fair.
348
00:17:22,408 --> 00:17:25,810
Now like I said, you're gonna
want to rest up for at least 12 hours.
349
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:27,369
You need to
metabolize that venom.
350
00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:29,381
Uh, now, can we clean the wound?
351
00:17:29,849 --> 00:17:32,080
Not unless you want to
reverse the whole process, Dale.
352
00:17:32,285 --> 00:17:33,685
You heard him,
Dale. Don't touch it!
353
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,282
And no physical activity.
354
00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:38,623
You must remain
perfectly still for 48 hours.
355
00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:00,771
Did you see that?
356
00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:05,684
See what? A light. A light
was flashing way downriver.
357
00:18:06,619 --> 00:18:08,096
So you saw a light.
What does that mean?
358
00:18:08,120 --> 00:18:10,783
10K. He signaled us.
Did anybody see it?
359
00:18:11,991 --> 00:18:13,425
Roberta, you saw it, didn't you?
360
00:18:13,759 --> 00:18:14,886
No.
361
00:18:14,961 --> 00:18:17,123
Well, how could I be
the only one to see it?
362
00:18:17,196 --> 00:18:18,789
Maybe 'cause
there's nothing to see.
363
00:18:19,799 --> 00:18:21,944
We've gone far enough south.
We head west in the morning.
364
00:18:21,968 --> 00:18:23,129
Who put you in charge?
365
00:18:24,637 --> 00:18:25,637
You're losing your head.
366
00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:27,832
Jeopardizing the mission.
367
00:18:27,907 --> 00:18:29,117
What do you know
about the mission?
368
00:18:29,141 --> 00:18:30,700
You're just here
collecting a bounty.
369
00:18:32,712 --> 00:18:34,152
I mean, who the
hell are you, anyway?
370
00:18:35,181 --> 00:18:36,381
Why are we dragging him along?
371
00:18:36,882 --> 00:18:38,202
Let's not get it
twisted, old man.
372
00:18:38,384 --> 00:18:40,410
I'm escorting this
prisoner to California.
373
00:18:40,486 --> 00:18:43,320
And I'm not putting him in danger
without a damn good reason.
374
00:18:43,823 --> 00:18:45,103
This is not one
of those reasons.
375
00:18:45,391 --> 00:18:46,916
Yeah, well, it ain't up to you.
376
00:18:48,260 --> 00:18:49,300
Want to find out if it is?
377
00:18:50,262 --> 00:18:51,525
Settle down.
378
00:18:53,366 --> 00:18:54,800
Nothing's happening tonight.
379
00:18:55,101 --> 00:18:57,434
And in the morning,
we'll reevaluate.
380
00:19:00,706 --> 00:19:02,072
You don't believe me?
381
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,268
I believe you.
382
00:19:03,909 --> 00:19:05,901
Come on, Doc. Don't let
this take you down, man.
383
00:19:07,079 --> 00:19:08,775
We push on.
384
00:19:09,682 --> 00:19:10,682
We survive.
385
00:19:12,251 --> 00:19:13,412
That's all we can do.
386
00:19:14,787 --> 00:19:16,449
Maybe I'm tired of pushing on.
387
00:19:17,890 --> 00:19:18,890
Hey.
388
00:19:19,859 --> 00:19:20,859
I know.
389
00:19:23,362 --> 00:19:24,455
Get some sleep.
390
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,205
There you have it.
391
00:19:42,281 --> 00:19:45,115
Opportunity presents
itself just as I suspected.
392
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:46,744
I'm telling you, kid.
You must be magic.
393
00:19:46,786 --> 00:19:48,914
There is no end to our
good luck since we met you.
394
00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:51,157
It's true. And it
runs in my family.
395
00:19:52,158 --> 00:19:54,787
My uncle Gerald's been
struck by lightning three times.
396
00:19:55,828 --> 00:19:57,262
Keys!
397
00:19:57,329 --> 00:19:58,609
I'm starting to
believe you guys.
398
00:20:39,505 --> 00:20:42,100
Well, we thought you
mighta run into some trouble.
399
00:20:43,676 --> 00:20:44,803
Just the usual.
400
00:20:44,877 --> 00:20:46,743
Nah, usually,
you're right on time.
401
00:20:46,812 --> 00:20:48,610
But no matter.
402
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,810
Uh, Swenson, get
these old boys a drink.
403
00:20:55,654 --> 00:20:58,123
I don't think we've met.
It's usually the other two.
404
00:20:58,824 --> 00:21:01,658
Those two clowns?
Former employees.
405
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:04,389
It's the price you pay for
delegating responsibility.
406
00:21:04,463 --> 00:21:05,658
But that's not your problem.
407
00:21:05,731 --> 00:21:08,200
Oh, yeah. It's hard
to find good help.
408
00:21:08,667 --> 00:21:10,158
We apologize on their behalf.
409
00:21:10,236 --> 00:21:11,864
That is not necessary.
410
00:21:12,738 --> 00:21:14,263
So... How'd we do?
411
00:21:15,608 --> 00:21:17,736
Been better, been worse.
412
00:21:17,810 --> 00:21:20,041
Well, ain't that the truth.
413
00:21:20,679 --> 00:21:22,375
Uh, you get a drink, son?
414
00:21:22,915 --> 00:21:24,781
Ah, no, no, no,
no. Kid's a mute.
415
00:21:25,117 --> 00:21:26,197
Fell on his head as a baby.
416
00:21:26,418 --> 00:21:27,538
But get him something stiff.
417
00:21:27,586 --> 00:21:29,131
All right. We can get
him something strong.
418
00:21:29,155 --> 00:21:31,147
Okay, hey! One
more for the mute!
419
00:21:38,097 --> 00:21:39,759
Pretty good, my ass!
420
00:21:39,832 --> 00:21:42,165
Well, look, you done
outdone yourselves!
421
00:21:43,002 --> 00:21:44,002
Apparently, we have.
422
00:21:44,103 --> 00:21:45,103
Oh.
423
00:21:45,171 --> 00:21:47,504
I have been a rude host.
424
00:21:47,773 --> 00:21:50,072
I haven't even
introduced myself.
425
00:21:50,609 --> 00:21:52,271
My name is Tyler Burr.
426
00:21:52,778 --> 00:21:53,939
This is my town.
427
00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:55,547
Burrtown.
428
00:21:55,948 --> 00:21:56,948
Fitting.
429
00:21:57,016 --> 00:21:59,110
Oh, yeah. Mr. Burr,
Mr. Smithson.
430
00:21:59,185 --> 00:22:01,450
Oh. This is my
associate, Geronimo.
431
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,386
His granddaddy's part Apache.
432
00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:05,824
And this is our
old boy, Renfield.
433
00:22:06,692 --> 00:22:08,252
We found him tied
to a tree in Kentucky.
434
00:22:08,494 --> 00:22:09,689
Well.
435
00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:13,496
My family came over on
the Mayflower, Mr. Smithson.
436
00:22:14,133 --> 00:22:16,102
And we enjoyed a
pretty good run of it too.
437
00:22:16,769 --> 00:22:19,068
Until it all went to
hell in a handbasket.
438
00:22:19,405 --> 00:22:20,703
Damn apocalypse.
439
00:22:20,773 --> 00:22:23,641
Oh, I'm talking about the
War of Northern Aggression.
440
00:22:24,443 --> 00:22:26,935
Fortunately, what
we have created here
441
00:22:27,112 --> 00:22:28,740
is a return to the glory.
442
00:22:29,248 --> 00:22:30,511
Made with our own hands.
443
00:22:30,783 --> 00:22:33,651
And that is what this
country is built on.
444
00:22:33,786 --> 00:22:35,721
Manufacturing, hmm?
445
00:22:36,088 --> 00:22:37,886
With able-bodied individuals,
446
00:22:38,157 --> 00:22:40,388
transformed by God himself
447
00:22:40,459 --> 00:22:44,328
into builders, growers,
energy creators.
448
00:22:45,531 --> 00:22:47,397
We have electricity.
449
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,998
A working distillery.
450
00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:54,307
And a community that keeps
an eye out on one another.
451
00:22:55,407 --> 00:23:00,345
We do not allow the afflicted
to drag us into the mud.
452
00:23:00,679 --> 00:23:01,679
No, sir.
453
00:23:01,847 --> 00:23:05,215
We wrangle them, tame them,
and turn them into a workforce.
454
00:23:05,885 --> 00:23:07,478
You're a man of
vision, Mr. Burr.
455
00:23:07,853 --> 00:23:10,789
Well, it's all about
protection, Mr. Smithson.
456
00:23:11,056 --> 00:23:14,254
Without protections, this
world's got no use for you.
457
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:16,358
Well, it's as I always say.
458
00:23:16,662 --> 00:23:18,392
You only need one friend,
459
00:23:18,664 --> 00:23:20,326
so long as it's
the right friend.
460
00:23:20,733 --> 00:23:23,134
Oh, I've said so myself
many times before.
461
00:23:23,269 --> 00:23:25,465
You pay the piper, the
piper keeps you safe.
462
00:23:26,138 --> 00:23:28,039
Facilitates a
life of recreation.
463
00:23:28,607 --> 00:23:30,567
You're gonna have to give
me your friend's number.
464
00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:37,173
Any friend of mine
is a friend of his.
465
00:23:37,383 --> 00:23:40,182
So enjoy some moonshine
and some women,
466
00:23:40,452 --> 00:23:42,250
both of which we
have in abundance,
467
00:23:42,588 --> 00:23:46,389
before you get back
to your recruiting tour.
468
00:23:46,592 --> 00:23:47,636
Appreciate the offer, Mr. Burr,
469
00:23:47,660 --> 00:23:49,571
but me and my friends
are on a very tight schedule.
470
00:23:49,595 --> 00:23:50,995
Mmm-hmm. We're
gonna stay the night.
471
00:23:51,397 --> 00:23:52,797
Road will be too dark. Well!
472
00:23:52,898 --> 00:23:53,898
It's noon.
473
00:23:54,166 --> 00:23:55,429
Eventually it's gonna be dark.
474
00:23:55,567 --> 00:23:57,399
Well, so true. So true.
475
00:23:57,903 --> 00:24:00,634
My friends, let's
freshen up those drinks.
476
00:24:03,075 --> 00:24:04,515
Make sure you
treat these boys right.
477
00:24:09,048 --> 00:24:11,040
Oh, sweet Jesus, hallelujah.
478
00:24:11,951 --> 00:24:14,716
Now we can get across that
damn river and find the kid.
479
00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:17,632
Oh, come on. You really think you're
gonna get this thing all the way across?
480
00:24:17,656 --> 00:24:18,954
I'm sure as hell gonna try.
481
00:24:19,558 --> 00:24:21,220
Doc. Don't waste
your breath, Warren.
482
00:24:21,427 --> 00:24:22,427
I'm going after him.
483
00:24:22,761 --> 00:24:24,239
You do what you
gotta do, but I'm going.
484
00:24:24,263 --> 00:24:25,993
What do you expect
us to do? Wait for you?
485
00:24:26,332 --> 00:24:27,994
Do whatever you want.
Then we head west.
486
00:24:28,233 --> 00:24:30,395
Am I the only one that
cares that 10K is out there?
487
00:24:30,469 --> 00:24:32,028
- Of course not!
- I'm sorry.
488
00:24:32,237 --> 00:24:36,072
I thought there was a mission that
dictated our each and every action,
489
00:24:36,141 --> 00:24:37,734
and that anything... Anything
490
00:24:38,444 --> 00:24:41,175
was justifiable in
service of the mission.
491
00:24:41,246 --> 00:24:42,714
We take care of each other.
492
00:24:42,781 --> 00:24:43,976
That's how we got this far.
493
00:24:44,049 --> 00:24:45,642
Without that,
there is no mission!
494
00:24:45,918 --> 00:24:47,409
Tell that to Cassandra, Doc.
495
00:24:49,688 --> 00:24:50,688
Or was she expendable?
496
00:24:51,123 --> 00:24:52,386
He did what he had to do.
497
00:24:52,458 --> 00:24:53,790
Bullshit.
498
00:24:53,859 --> 00:24:56,419
He's a child with a gun who kills
anything he doesn't understand.
499
00:24:56,895 --> 00:24:58,158
And let's not forget...
500
00:24:58,964 --> 00:25:00,660
Each and every one
of you is expendable.
501
00:25:02,001 --> 00:25:04,334
There's only one piece of
precious cargo on this train.
502
00:25:04,803 --> 00:25:07,739
Well, brother. At least we
all know where we stand.
503
00:25:07,906 --> 00:25:09,306
Hey.
504
00:25:09,375 --> 00:25:10,375
It's not personal.
505
00:25:12,177 --> 00:25:13,177
Doc.
506
00:25:13,245 --> 00:25:15,237
Are you willing to throw
it all away right here?
507
00:25:16,749 --> 00:25:18,411
Yeah. Yeah, I am.
508
00:25:20,953 --> 00:25:22,753
We'll head south as far
as the Gortner Bridge.
509
00:25:23,622 --> 00:25:25,284
If you're there, we'll regroup.
510
00:25:26,492 --> 00:25:30,793
Otherwise, this is it.
511
00:25:49,114 --> 00:25:50,114
Let's go.
512
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:58,987
I told you. I told you
Elvis was still alive.
513
00:25:59,058 --> 00:26:00,993
Oh, he's alive, all right.
514
00:26:01,060 --> 00:26:02,426
And he's kept
the weight off too.
515
00:26:02,528 --> 00:26:03,528
Tell him, Renfield.
516
00:26:05,197 --> 00:26:07,166
What's he saying?
What's he saying?
517
00:26:07,299 --> 00:26:09,564
Well, that's... No, no,
no, you go, you go.
518
00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:11,309
Okay.
519
00:26:11,403 --> 00:26:15,238
Okay, he's talking about this time
where we did this thing that happened.
520
00:26:15,374 --> 00:26:16,740
Amazing!
521
00:26:18,777 --> 00:26:20,057
I can't even believe it.
522
00:26:20,145 --> 00:26:22,444
Well, it's hard to
believe at this point.
523
00:26:22,514 --> 00:26:24,380
I got so many questions.
524
00:26:24,716 --> 00:26:26,014
All right, shoot.
525
00:26:26,085 --> 00:26:27,246
How old is Elvis?
526
00:26:27,519 --> 00:26:28,999
He doesn't look a day over 60.
527
00:26:31,290 --> 00:26:32,485
Give me one reason.
528
00:26:33,192 --> 00:26:36,185
I don't need much. This
world will not miss you.
529
00:26:36,562 --> 00:26:37,825
And you may be skinny,
530
00:26:38,430 --> 00:26:40,831
but that wheel can always use
another body. Ain't that right?
531
00:26:41,767 --> 00:26:45,101
You didn't mind doing the
devil's work so long as it suits you.
532
00:26:45,170 --> 00:26:47,105
Luring all those
men into your truck.
533
00:26:47,473 --> 00:26:48,634
That all sits right with you?
534
00:26:48,740 --> 00:26:49,833
We didn't kill those men.
535
00:26:49,908 --> 00:26:51,399
So you can talk now, huh?
536
00:26:51,510 --> 00:26:53,750
We stole that truck. We didn't
know what was in the back.
537
00:26:54,847 --> 00:26:57,510
We had nothing to do with
capturing those zombies.
538
00:26:58,417 --> 00:26:59,417
My friends...
539
00:26:59,952 --> 00:27:02,152
They're all right. They
just, they like to tell stories.
540
00:27:02,321 --> 00:27:03,321
That they do.
541
00:27:03,489 --> 00:27:06,220
I hardly know them, actually.
I was, I was part of a group.
542
00:27:06,792 --> 00:27:09,159
We were transporting
the Murphy to California.
543
00:27:09,595 --> 00:27:11,154
You've met "the" Murphy?
544
00:27:12,264 --> 00:27:13,264
Yeah.
545
00:27:13,899 --> 00:27:14,923
What's he like?
546
00:27:15,134 --> 00:27:16,134
He's a jerk.
547
00:27:16,735 --> 00:27:18,601
But the rest of them,
they were good people.
548
00:27:19,872 --> 00:27:21,170
We were trying
to save the world.
549
00:27:23,675 --> 00:27:24,675
Where are they now?
550
00:27:24,843 --> 00:27:27,403
Well, we were headed south on
the river when we hit a zombie jam.
551
00:27:27,813 --> 00:27:29,008
I swam ashore, but...
552
00:27:29,515 --> 00:27:30,813
We were headed
to Gortner Bridge.
553
00:27:30,883 --> 00:27:32,523
If they're alive,
that's where they'll be.
554
00:27:32,684 --> 00:27:33,924
You think they'll wait for you?
555
00:27:34,186 --> 00:27:35,296
I know Doc wouldn't leave me.
556
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:36,788
He'd... He'd think of something.
557
00:27:38,790 --> 00:27:40,088
I had a husband.
558
00:27:40,225 --> 00:27:42,387
Well, second husband, actually.
559
00:27:43,595 --> 00:27:46,224
In this world that's all you
need, just one other person.
560
00:27:46,999 --> 00:27:48,194
That's reason enough.
561
00:27:49,535 --> 00:27:52,198
He's on that wheel over there.
562
00:27:52,838 --> 00:27:53,965
In purgatory.
563
00:27:58,577 --> 00:28:01,911
I know what it's like to see
somebody you care about
564
00:28:02,714 --> 00:28:04,376
and know that they need mercy.
565
00:28:05,784 --> 00:28:06,784
But actually doing it...
566
00:28:08,320 --> 00:28:11,085
Well, this whole town is wicked.
567
00:28:12,391 --> 00:28:14,451
I came here with two
thoughts in my mind.
568
00:28:15,527 --> 00:28:18,156
To release the man I love
and put him in his rightful place,
569
00:28:19,198 --> 00:28:20,928
and to watch this town burn.
570
00:28:21,667 --> 00:28:23,033
I wouldn't mind seeing that too.
571
00:28:26,471 --> 00:28:27,905
Hey, Renfield!
572
00:28:27,973 --> 00:28:29,532
I just found your
future ex-wife!
573
00:28:38,417 --> 00:28:40,682
Oh, hey, I think it's
about time we took off.
574
00:28:41,486 --> 00:28:43,182
I need to make a call.
575
00:29:03,842 --> 00:29:06,175
Court is in session.
576
00:29:06,578 --> 00:29:10,037
The honorable Judge
Escorpion presiding.
577
00:29:32,638 --> 00:29:35,608
These fools stand
accused of grand larceny,
578
00:29:36,408 --> 00:29:38,536
willful deception and fraud.
579
00:29:40,946 --> 00:29:42,141
In case you were wondering,
580
00:29:43,415 --> 00:29:44,415
I almost broke 80 today.
581
00:29:46,551 --> 00:29:47,991
Not only did you
steal from Mr. Burr,
582
00:29:48,854 --> 00:29:49,854
you stole from the Zeros.
583
00:29:51,490 --> 00:29:53,650
And you robbed me of the
greatest golf game of my life.
584
00:29:54,793 --> 00:29:55,873
How do you feel about that?
585
00:29:56,862 --> 00:29:57,862
It's disappointing.
586
00:30:00,499 --> 00:30:02,019
Will you be acting
as your own counsel?
587
00:30:02,334 --> 00:30:05,827
Uh, I will, Your Honor.
588
00:30:07,272 --> 00:30:08,399
How do each of you plead?
589
00:30:08,674 --> 00:30:09,801
Guilty.
590
00:30:10,409 --> 00:30:12,708
With an explanation.
591
00:30:12,811 --> 00:30:14,211
Objection.
592
00:30:14,279 --> 00:30:16,748
This man is a liar and a thief.
593
00:30:17,416 --> 00:30:18,748
Overruled. Damn.
594
00:30:20,452 --> 00:30:21,452
Please continue.
595
00:30:28,794 --> 00:30:30,353
The path to truth,
596
00:30:30,429 --> 00:30:31,795
it's not a straight line.
597
00:30:32,798 --> 00:30:33,798
It's squiggly.
598
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,231
One man's truth is
another man's fallacy.
599
00:30:37,402 --> 00:30:39,462
And heretofore within...
600
00:30:40,105 --> 00:30:41,105
Bear with me here.
601
00:30:41,740 --> 00:30:43,368
I am reminded of
602
00:30:44,476 --> 00:30:47,310
the case of Dred Scott
v. the City of Sacramento.
603
00:30:47,379 --> 00:30:48,677
We all remember that one, right?
604
00:30:48,814 --> 00:30:49,814
I mean, who doesn't?
605
00:30:50,349 --> 00:30:53,444
Or Terry Bradshaw v.
The State of Oklahoma?
606
00:30:53,518 --> 00:30:54,577
Hello? Ring a bell?
607
00:30:54,653 --> 00:30:56,212
Objection!
608
00:30:57,155 --> 00:30:58,155
Stop interrupting.
609
00:31:03,295 --> 00:31:06,493
See, it's not my job to educate
you on legal precedents.
610
00:31:06,565 --> 00:31:07,565
That could take all day.
611
00:31:08,033 --> 00:31:11,800
But it is my job to illustrate
just how the accusers
612
00:31:12,104 --> 00:31:15,074
have attempted to defame and
slander myself and my clients
613
00:31:15,507 --> 00:31:18,568
by executing some
kind of fancy flea flicker
614
00:31:18,810 --> 00:31:21,177
on the fine citizens
of this great town.
615
00:31:21,413 --> 00:31:22,413
Yeah!
616
00:31:23,849 --> 00:31:26,182
I don't believe in
the hidden ball trick
617
00:31:26,551 --> 00:31:27,780
like these guys.
618
00:31:28,353 --> 00:31:31,032
Now, if I'm going up against an
opponent, I'm going right down the middle.
619
00:31:31,056 --> 00:31:34,720
He's gonna see me coming, by
God, because I like my steak rare!
620
00:31:34,793 --> 00:31:35,793
Yeah!
621
00:31:35,927 --> 00:31:37,919
I like my whiskey straight up!
622
00:31:38,063 --> 00:31:41,033
I like my cars fast
and my women rough!
623
00:31:43,935 --> 00:31:45,198
I'm an American.
624
00:31:46,004 --> 00:31:47,004
North American.
625
00:31:47,606 --> 00:31:49,802
And I don't apologize
for that! Yeah.
626
00:31:49,975 --> 00:31:53,605
I put my pants on one leg at
a time, thank you very much!
627
00:31:57,582 --> 00:31:58,582
America!
628
00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:16,295
Hey, check it out.
629
00:32:17,369 --> 00:32:18,449
You get that thing started?
630
00:32:19,704 --> 00:32:20,704
I'll give it a shot.
631
00:32:39,391 --> 00:32:40,450
Doc!
632
00:32:55,774 --> 00:32:57,254
I could walk you
all through it again.
633
00:32:58,710 --> 00:33:00,144
The time discrepancy,
634
00:33:01,546 --> 00:33:02,946
the rates of descent,
635
00:33:03,748 --> 00:33:07,378
second shooters,
detonation patterns,
636
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:10,084
cellular records,
637
00:33:10,155 --> 00:33:12,454
communication towers,
638
00:33:12,524 --> 00:33:15,426
multi-layered encryption,
639
00:33:15,494 --> 00:33:17,554
all of the damn
chemtrails in the sky.
640
00:33:17,629 --> 00:33:18,709
I mean, have you seen that?
641
00:33:18,997 --> 00:33:21,193
What is that? That's
what I'm asking.
642
00:33:21,399 --> 00:33:23,698
Oh, well, those are
the... It doesn't matter!
643
00:33:24,302 --> 00:33:25,395
The point is
644
00:33:27,272 --> 00:33:28,399
you're all great people.
645
00:33:29,140 --> 00:33:30,140
You,
646
00:33:30,408 --> 00:33:31,808
you're a straight shooter.
647
00:33:32,077 --> 00:33:33,272
You go right from the hip.
648
00:33:33,512 --> 00:33:35,504
You, you're honest-to-goodness.
649
00:33:36,615 --> 00:33:38,243
You, you're tried and true.
650
00:33:39,017 --> 00:33:40,883
You, salt of the earth.
651
00:33:41,620 --> 00:33:43,612
You, drop-dead gorgeous.
652
00:33:44,623 --> 00:33:46,956
What I'm saying here is, people,
653
00:33:47,826 --> 00:33:50,318
I wouldn't try to distract you
654
00:33:50,395 --> 00:33:53,923
with a bunch of random
facts and figures of speech
655
00:33:53,999 --> 00:33:55,729
'cause you'd smell a
fraud from a mile away.
656
00:33:56,568 --> 00:33:58,935
And I have too
much respect for you.
657
00:33:59,771 --> 00:34:01,672
Oh, people, people, people.
658
00:34:02,207 --> 00:34:03,767
There's nothing to
fear but fear itself.
659
00:34:04,910 --> 00:34:06,037
And in summation,
660
00:34:07,379 --> 00:34:09,644
I'm thinking of the words of
the great Clarence Thomas.
661
00:34:10,849 --> 00:34:11,976
"If it don't fit,
662
00:34:13,018 --> 00:34:14,042
"you must acquit."
663
00:34:14,185 --> 00:34:15,185
Oh.
664
00:34:25,830 --> 00:34:27,822
Those men are con
artists and thieves!
665
00:34:29,868 --> 00:34:31,200
And he bit me!
666
00:34:38,243 --> 00:34:39,243
That was beautiful.
667
00:34:42,581 --> 00:34:43,581
But you're guilty, bro.
668
00:34:43,915 --> 00:34:44,915
Shit.
669
00:34:48,086 --> 00:34:49,452
I want to do you
a favor, though.
670
00:34:54,125 --> 00:34:55,889
Death by hanging.
671
00:35:12,611 --> 00:35:14,251
We've waited long
enough! It's time to go!
672
00:35:14,312 --> 00:35:15,610
Just a minute.
673
00:35:27,292 --> 00:35:30,387
There's not a lot of people looking
out for each other in this world anymore.
674
00:35:32,731 --> 00:35:34,063
But you always did.
675
00:35:36,234 --> 00:35:39,466
So if 10K's out
there, he knows that.
676
00:35:42,774 --> 00:35:43,867
But we gotta go right now.
677
00:35:46,745 --> 00:35:48,145
And it's not for Murphy.
678
00:35:49,748 --> 00:35:50,748
It's for me.
679
00:35:51,750 --> 00:35:52,911
I need you.
680
00:36:01,326 --> 00:36:02,366
Well, kid. What can I say?
681
00:36:03,762 --> 00:36:04,762
I couldn't get to you.
682
00:36:07,432 --> 00:36:09,560
The river's so full of Zs,
I damn near drowned.
683
00:36:13,004 --> 00:36:14,529
But I hope you know I tried.
684
00:36:19,577 --> 00:36:21,011
You hang tough, buddy.
685
00:36:22,047 --> 00:36:23,379
I'm gonna miss you.
686
00:36:25,183 --> 00:36:26,446
Love you, kid.
687
00:36:30,021 --> 00:36:32,650
Sorry, Doc. But he knew
what he was getting into.
688
00:36:56,247 --> 00:36:59,127
These men have been convicted
of some pretty messed up crimes.
689
00:37:00,518 --> 00:37:02,078
And even though I
like a couple of them,
690
00:37:03,154 --> 00:37:05,316
the law is the law.
691
00:37:07,025 --> 00:37:10,928
Mr. Smithson,
Mr. Geronimo, Mr. Renfield,
692
00:37:12,263 --> 00:37:15,165
you've been found guilty of
grand larceny, identity theft,
693
00:37:15,233 --> 00:37:18,226
and just generally telling
a whole bunch of lies.
694
00:37:19,204 --> 00:37:21,799
Mr. Burr, it's all yours.
695
00:37:23,408 --> 00:37:25,570
Dear God,
696
00:37:25,643 --> 00:37:29,080
please watch over
these poor souls,
697
00:37:29,180 --> 00:37:32,207
whose deviant and wayward paths
698
00:37:32,283 --> 00:37:35,811
have led them to this
unfortunate conclusion.
699
00:37:36,621 --> 00:37:39,716
We can only hope, oh, Lord,
700
00:37:39,791 --> 00:37:42,784
that they don't cause
as much trouble in hell
701
00:37:42,861 --> 00:37:45,126
as they have in this world.
702
00:37:45,730 --> 00:37:46,730
And God,
703
00:37:47,198 --> 00:37:50,396
please get the word out that if
anybody steals any of my trucks,
704
00:37:50,468 --> 00:37:51,595
they're in for a long nap.
705
00:37:52,203 --> 00:37:53,432
Amen!
706
00:37:53,972 --> 00:37:54,972
Amen.
707
00:37:56,708 --> 00:37:57,868
Let's get this party started.
708
00:38:01,146 --> 00:38:02,739
You have any last words? Yes!
709
00:38:02,947 --> 00:38:04,415
Yes, I have last words.
710
00:38:05,183 --> 00:38:07,311
Um, I don't even
know where to start.
711
00:38:07,886 --> 00:38:09,354
There's so many people to thank.
712
00:38:10,255 --> 00:38:11,553
I grew up in the High Plains.
713
00:38:12,290 --> 00:38:13,622
My daddy was a rancher.
714
00:38:14,526 --> 00:38:16,995
We used to ride
bulls, herd cattle...
715
00:38:18,196 --> 00:38:21,689
sip beer, and breathe in
that clean Nebraska air.
716
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,326
I want to thank my
mom and my dad
717
00:38:24,402 --> 00:38:25,563
and my old girlfriend Sally,
718
00:38:25,637 --> 00:38:27,606
who was the first
one to let me put my...
719
00:38:27,672 --> 00:38:28,867
Hey, enough of that.
720
00:38:30,141 --> 00:38:31,200
Okay.
721
00:38:34,312 --> 00:38:35,312
It's hanging time.
722
00:38:44,189 --> 00:38:45,919
All right, pull!
723
00:39:46,918 --> 00:39:49,129
I told you you could survive
anything, you damn cockroach!
724
00:39:49,153 --> 00:39:50,913
I knew you'd come back
for me. Damn straight.
725
00:39:51,022 --> 00:39:52,650
We should get out
of here. Let's boogie.
726
00:40:07,505 --> 00:40:08,505
Come on.
727
00:40:20,551 --> 00:40:21,678
Hey, baby.
728
00:40:36,968 --> 00:40:37,968
Let's move!
729
00:40:51,849 --> 00:40:52,976
10K! Come on!
730
00:40:53,418 --> 00:40:54,647
We gotta go!
731
00:40:54,819 --> 00:40:56,515
Let's go! Beat it, kid.
732
00:40:56,955 --> 00:40:58,446
We're not leaving
here empty-handed.
733
00:40:58,690 --> 00:40:59,690
Come on. Grab my hand.
734
00:40:59,924 --> 00:41:01,392
Go, man. We got this.
735
00:41:01,693 --> 00:41:03,203
I'm telling you.
Seriously, we'll be fine.
736
00:41:03,227 --> 00:41:05,107
What are you talking
about? You guys are goners.
737
00:41:05,229 --> 00:41:06,229
Are you kidding me?
738
00:41:06,331 --> 00:41:07,959
Hey, don't you know by now, kid?
739
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:10,735
We're the two luckiest
bastards you ever met.
740
00:41:11,035 --> 00:41:12,035
They're getting close!
741
00:41:15,473 --> 00:41:16,566
Thank you.
742
00:41:16,708 --> 00:41:18,388
For what? We still
haven't gotten you laid.
743
00:41:20,011 --> 00:41:21,070
For everything else, then.
744
00:41:53,778 --> 00:41:55,089
Probably should've
ditched the weapons.
745
00:41:55,113 --> 00:41:56,274
Coulda, shoulda...
746
00:41:56,647 --> 00:41:58,007
You know, they
got a name for that.
747
00:41:58,583 --> 00:42:00,108
Monday morning quarterback.
748
00:42:00,218 --> 00:42:03,197
Yeah, well, if we can't be self-critical,
there's no room for self-improvement.
749
00:42:03,221 --> 00:42:04,746
Who said that? I did.
750
00:42:05,089 --> 00:42:06,148
Oh.
751
00:42:09,227 --> 00:42:10,786
So I've been
thinking. Not again.
752
00:42:11,062 --> 00:42:12,155
Where to next?
753
00:42:12,797 --> 00:42:14,356
I'm thinking maybe Australia.
754
00:42:14,565 --> 00:42:15,965
They speak English there.
755
00:42:16,034 --> 00:42:17,627
Yeah, true. But
it's far, though.
756
00:42:18,336 --> 00:42:20,601
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
757
00:42:23,207 --> 00:42:24,207
You ready?
758
00:42:25,009 --> 00:42:26,910
Sure. Why not?
54298
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