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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,474 --> 00:00:09,574 01 Scary Movie 1 - Comedy 2000 English 2 00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:17,089 [PHONE RINGS] 3 00:00:19,436 --> 00:00:22,394 - Hello? - [MENACING VOICE] Wanna have fun? 4 00:00:22,439 --> 00:00:25,306 - Who is this? - Tell me your name and I'll tell you mine. 5 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:27,482 I don't think so. [FARTS] 6 00:00:27,569 --> 00:00:30,311 - What's that noise? - Oops. I farted. 7 00:00:30,405 --> 00:00:33,568 - I-I didn't think you would hear me. - No, that popping noise. 8 00:00:33,617 --> 00:00:37,611 Oh! I'm making popcorn. I'm getting ready to watch a video. 9 00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:41,288 - Ooh! What is it? - It's just a scary movie. 10 00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,491 - Do you like scary movies? - Mm-hm. 11 00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:46,998 - What's your favourite? - Mm, I don't know. 12 00:00:47,089 --> 00:00:48,671 Think. 13 00:00:48,757 --> 00:00:52,421 Oh, I know. Kazaam you know, the one where Shaq plays a genie? 14 00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:56,178 - That's not a horror movie. - Well, you haven't seen Shaq act. 15 00:00:56,265 --> 00:00:57,926 [POOPING] 16 00:00:57,975 --> 00:01:01,013 - Hey, you have a nice voice. - Thanks. 17 00:01:01,103 --> 00:01:03,390 You never did tell me your name. 18 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:05,596 Why do you wanna know my name? 19 00:01:05,649 --> 00:01:08,732 Cos I wanna know who I'm looking at. 20 00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:12,311 What... what did you say? 21 00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,647 Nice breasts. 22 00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:16,527 Look, what do you want? 23 00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:19,326 I wanna see what your insides look like. 24 00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:21,950 Well, then turn to page 54. 25 00:01:21,999 --> 00:01:23,990 Oh. 26 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,700 Hey, nice! 27 00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:29,541 Listen, ass hole, you've had your fun. 28 00:01:29,631 --> 00:01:32,669 - Now you'd better stop, or else. - Or else what? 29 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:36,962 Or else my boyfriend's gonna be here any minute. He's black, and he'll kick your ass. 30 00:01:37,014 --> 00:01:38,345 - Oh, really? - Yeah. 31 00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:41,174 The one who wears makeup and dresses like a woman? 32 00:01:41,268 --> 00:01:44,932 - How did you know? - Turn the porch lights on. 33 00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:53,527 Help! Help! 34 00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:55,480 Oh, that's not my boyfriend. 35 00:01:55,532 --> 00:01:58,069 I've fucked him a couple of times, but that's it. 36 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:01,403 - [SQUEALING] - Look, I'm calling the cops. 37 00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:03,828 Go ahead. Call the cops. 38 00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:06,741 But you might wanna check the back door first. 39 00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:08,997 You forgot to lock it. 40 00:02:19,056 --> 00:02:21,297 [DOORBELL] 41 00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:34,318 Take that, you psycho! 42 00:02:35,739 --> 00:02:37,650 [GROANING] 43 00:02:37,741 --> 00:02:39,448 I can't feel my legs. 44 00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,866 I think my arm is broken. 45 00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:45,575 - Sorry. - I want my mommy. 46 00:02:49,211 --> 00:02:50,497 Hello, Drew. 47 00:02:56,760 --> 00:02:58,751 Oh, God! 48 00:03:04,768 --> 00:03:06,759 Oh, God! 49 00:03:07,938 --> 00:03:09,929 Oh, God! 50 00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:13,770 [SCREAMS] 51 00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:19,271 [SCREAMING] 52 00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:33,536 [SCREAMS] 53 00:03:56,445 --> 00:03:57,526 [DREW] No! 54 00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:06,906 Hm? 55 00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:08,863 [WHIMPERS] 56 00:04:09,833 --> 00:04:12,700 Daddy! Daddy! 57 00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:14,000 Ugh! 58 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:18,172 Daddy! 59 00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:20,465 - [MOAN] - Daddy, no! No! 60 00:04:24,347 --> 00:04:27,339 - Did you hear something? - No, I didn't hear anything. 61 00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:41,937 [KEYBOARD CLICKING] 62 00:04:43,074 --> 00:04:44,564 [RUSTLING] 63 00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:48,527 [DOG BARKING] 64 00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:55,538 [SQUEALS] 65 00:04:55,587 --> 00:04:58,579 Bobby! What are you doing? My dad's in the other room. 66 00:04:58,673 --> 00:05:01,290 It occurred to me I never climbed through your window. 67 00:05:01,384 --> 00:05:04,672 Now that you got it out of your system, Bobby, you got to leave. 68 00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:06,382 - Why'? - [DOOR RATTLES] 69 00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:08,805 Shh. Come on. 70 00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:11,474 What's going on in there? Agh! Ow! 71 00:05:11,561 --> 00:05:15,725 Daddy's head is stuck. Unstick Daddy's head. Ohh! 72 00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:17,936 - Dad, can you knock? - Knock? 73 00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:21,769 - I thought I heard screaming in here. - No. No, you didn't, Dad. 74 00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:24,525 It could've been that crack I smoked earlier, I guess. 75 00:05:24,574 --> 00:05:26,440 - Yeah. - Yeah, that's what it was. 76 00:05:26,535 --> 00:05:31,450 I gotta leave town for a couple of days - that business I started with the Colombians. 77 00:05:31,540 --> 00:05:34,373 - Oh, you mean Uncle Escobar. - Yeah, that's right. 78 00:05:34,417 --> 00:05:36,909 There's a problem. Some money went missing. 79 00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:41,088 Apparently, legs are gonna get broken. It's better if I lay low for a couple of days. 80 00:05:41,132 --> 00:05:43,920 - If the cops raid the place... - I never heard of you. 81 00:05:44,010 --> 00:05:46,126 - And don't forget... - To flush your stash. 82 00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:49,304 Oh, you are my little girl. I love you so much... 83 00:05:49,391 --> 00:05:52,258 - I left you something in the coffee can. - Dad. 84 00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:55,143 But you have to remember to step on it before you sell it. 85 00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:58,143 - Now, what are you gonna cut it with? - Um, baking... 86 00:05:58,233 --> 00:05:59,940 Baking soda. Not baking powder. 87 00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:03,774 Because baking powder guys will have muffins growing out of their nose. 88 00:06:03,822 --> 00:06:08,908 You love that joke, don't you? You've loved that joke since you were two years old. 89 00:06:08,952 --> 00:06:10,863 - OK, well... - OK, I love you. 90 00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:13,195 - I love you. - Have a good trip. 91 00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:14,906 - Bye. - Bye. 92 00:06:16,793 --> 00:06:20,912 [AS MONKEY] Is the coast clear? Oh, Cindy, that nightgown! 93 00:06:20,964 --> 00:06:23,956 That was close. God! 94 00:06:27,637 --> 00:06:32,677 I was, uh, home watching The Exorcist, and it got me thinking about you. 95 00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:36,886 If this is about the time I puked green slime and masturbated with a crucifix... 96 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:39,142 It was my first keg party, Bobby. 97 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,893 No. No. 98 00:06:40,984 --> 00:06:43,772 It was edited for TV. All the good stuff was cut out. 99 00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:46,608 So you thought you would just climb through my window 100 00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:48,897 and we would play bump-bump? 101 00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:51,074 I was kind of hoping to get my balls licked, 102 00:06:51,161 --> 00:06:54,119 but I wouldn't wanna break your little underwear rule. 103 00:06:54,164 --> 00:06:57,282 So maybe just some on-top-of-the-clothes type stuff? 104 00:07:00,337 --> 00:07:01,702 OK. 105 00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:03,787 But just for a minute. 106 00:07:18,563 --> 00:07:20,554 What the...?! 107 00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:23,147 Wrong set. 108 00:07:23,193 --> 00:07:25,685 ♪ [theme to Dawson's Creek] ♪ 109 00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:28,145 Bobby... 110 00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:29,609 Oh, Bobby... 111 00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:34,034 ♪ I don't wanna wait ♪ ♪ for our lives to be over ♪ 112 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,737 - No, Bobby, don't. - Ow! 113 00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,040 - Jeez. - [ELECTRICITY BUZZES] 114 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:42,493 - I see. - Yeah, my dad. 115 00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:47,210 OK, stud... you have to go now. 116 00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:54,012 Oh, um, about the sex stuff? 117 00:07:54,057 --> 00:07:56,924 I was only half serious. I don't wanna rush you. 118 00:07:57,018 --> 00:07:59,885 Hey, would you settle for PG-13? 119 00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:01,971 What's that? 120 00:08:04,025 --> 00:08:05,641 Oh, jeez! 121 00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:08,022 - [CRASH] - Good night, Bobby. 122 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:16,569 - [LAUGHING] - Shorty, you are so loud! 123 00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:19,033 Make sure you take your behind to class today. 124 00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:22,495 - I do be going to class. - Lunch is not a class, Shorty. 125 00:08:22,585 --> 00:08:25,168 It is when you got the munchies. 126 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:29,123 - See, that's why you such a dumb-ass. - Your mother. 127 00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:33,085 You my brother. That's your mother too, jackass. 128 00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:36,597 Oh, yeah. Well, then, your father's stupid. 129 00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:39,178 So? I don't know him. 130 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:42,136 Yeah, me neither. 131 00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:46,019 - Hey, girl, you ready? - Yeah, in a minute. 132 00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:51,195 - Come on, we're gonna be late. - Wait. There's Buffy. 133 00:08:51,281 --> 00:08:55,366 I don't know why you hang out with her. She is such a ho! 134 00:08:55,452 --> 00:08:58,570 - Why do you say that? - Cos I've seen her. 135 00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:01,784 - My friend Sean had a pool party... - Sean? 136 00:09:01,833 --> 00:09:03,619 You know, Puff Daddy? 137 00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:06,376 Anyway, everybody was drinking Crystal champagne. 138 00:09:06,463 --> 00:09:09,626 Then it got wild, and people were getting freaky in the pool. 139 00:09:09,674 --> 00:09:14,589 I look over, and there was your girl getting buck-wild in the Jacuzzi. 140 00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:18,005 - So? - With a backup dancer! 141 00:09:18,975 --> 00:09:22,718 I mean, that's nasty. That's lower than the security guard. 142 00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:27,022 At least security can get you backstage. She don't love herself. 143 00:09:27,108 --> 00:09:30,521 - Bye, Daddy. - I don't know. I think Buffy's sweet, Brenda. 144 00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:33,570 She is as fake as press-on nails. 145 00:09:33,656 --> 00:09:38,116 - Hey, baby girl! - Hi. Hi. 146 00:09:38,161 --> 00:09:39,868 What is up, my sister? 147 00:09:39,954 --> 00:09:42,867 - Bye, Mr Gilmore. - Bye! 148 00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:45,164 - Is he gone? - Yep. 149 00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:48,243 ♪ Do you like what you see? ♪ 150 00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:51,922 ♪ It's all about the money ♪ 151 00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:53,999 [GIRL] Hey, Cindy! 152 00:09:57,847 --> 00:10:00,839 - I love this colour. - Let me see that. 153 00:10:02,310 --> 00:10:05,177 Oh, you guys should not use this brand. 154 00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:08,229 - Why not? - Cos they test their products on animals. 155 00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:09,852 - So? - Look. 156 00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:13,769 Have you seen what they do to those poor animals? 157 00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:19,275 Well, I am much more of a people person. 158 00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:22,612 I'd like to feed all the hungry little children of the world. 159 00:10:22,705 --> 00:10:25,242 - I'd rather help my fellow man... - Spare a dollar? 160 00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:27,870 - Get away from me, you burn! - Buffy! 161 00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:30,206 Can't you see he's just hungry? 162 00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:33,084 Here you go, sir. A nice sandwich. 163 00:10:34,509 --> 00:10:37,877 - See? - I said a dollar, bitch! 164 00:10:38,346 --> 00:10:40,212 Ow! 165 00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:43,469 God! Look at this place. 166 00:10:43,935 --> 00:10:45,892 It's a circus. 167 00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:50,769 Hello. I'm Gail Hailstorm, author of the book You're Dead, I'm Rich. 168 00:10:50,859 --> 00:10:55,353 A small college town is in shock after the unthinkable has happened: 169 00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:58,147 a brutal killing spree that left one teen dead... 170 00:10:58,241 --> 00:11:00,858 - That's it! ..two teens dead... - [GUNSHOT] 171 00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:03,277 and this small town shaken and stirred. 172 00:11:03,371 --> 00:11:06,739 - It's times like these... - Police are combing the area for clues. 173 00:11:06,791 --> 00:11:09,249 There are no witnesses available at this time. 174 00:11:09,294 --> 00:11:12,753 There are no suspects in custody. Police are asking anyone... 175 00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:17,254 Reporting live for Black TV. White folks are dead, and we're getting the fuck outta here! 176 00:11:17,302 --> 00:11:21,671 Grab your shit and let's go, mother fucker! Let's go! 177 00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:26,308 Hey, do you think the press is gonna wanna talk to us? 178 00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:31,355 Oh, no. The press only wants to interview the most ignorant person they can find. 179 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:35,184 I'm on TV! Oh, shit! First Cops, now this! 180 00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:37,144 I'm gonna be a star! 181 00:11:37,238 --> 00:11:41,607 - What can you tell us about Drew? - Well, she had the phat ass. 182 00:11:41,659 --> 00:11:44,822 - I mean, it was, like, bang! - How close were you to the victim? 183 00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:49,703 Real close. Until the roofies wore off. She woke up talking about pressing charges, 184 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:52,033 so I pulled my tongue out of her ass and left. 185 00:11:52,128 --> 00:11:54,290 What would have been your last words to Drew? 186 00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:57,498 Run, bitch! Run! 187 00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:04,254 Hey, yo, dog. Does this shirt make me look gay? 188 00:12:04,307 --> 00:12:06,298 No, man. 189 00:12:07,685 --> 00:12:11,269 - What about now? - Nah. 190 00:12:11,314 --> 00:12:12,804 - Cool? - Yeah. 191 00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:14,981 Don't forget: election's Tuesday. 192 00:12:15,026 --> 00:12:17,108 [MOCKING] Don't forget: election's Tuesday. 193 00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:19,770 Oh! Goddammit! 194 00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:22,359 Son of a bitch! 195 00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:25,488 What's the matter, honey? 196 00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:28,570 My report card. 197 00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:32,499 Well, at least you got one. 198 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,577 - Yeah. I did, huh? - Yeah. 199 00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:38,460 - You're so smart. - [MOANING] 200 00:12:38,508 --> 00:12:41,591 - Hey, has anybody seen Bobby? - Nah. 201 00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:43,669 You know what? That kid is always late. 202 00:12:43,721 --> 00:12:46,258 I don't get it. He lives so close. 203 00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:49,137 ♪ [PUNK SONG 2 BY SILVERCHAIR] ♪ 204 00:12:56,359 --> 00:12:58,726 See you later, Hairy Mama, Bubba, Jim, 205 00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:01,733 Big Jim, Little Jim, Slim Jim, everybody. 206 00:13:01,823 --> 00:13:05,316 I'll see you later. Ciao, Ding. All right. 207 00:13:11,249 --> 00:13:13,661 Damn, girl. Mm-mm-mm. 208 00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:16,452 - I'd sure like to get in your pants. - Really? 209 00:13:16,546 --> 00:13:18,708 Yeah. What size are these? 210 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:22,549 - [BOBBY] Hey, GUYS- - Hey, Bobby. 211 00:13:22,593 --> 00:13:24,675 Hey, baby. 212 00:13:24,721 --> 00:13:27,053 - How you doing? - Good. 213 00:13:27,098 --> 00:13:29,305 You guys see all the reporters out there? 214 00:13:29,392 --> 00:13:32,350 Saying that girl Drew Decker got killed last night. 215 00:13:32,395 --> 00:13:35,012 - You know what? I think I knew her. - Really? 216 00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:37,647 - She had a brother named Steve? - Yeah. 217 00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:40,351 Long hair, pretty little mouth, perfect ass? 218 00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:43,361 - That was her. - Nah, I was talking about Steve. 219 00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:45,397 Whatever happened to him? 220 00:13:45,491 --> 00:13:48,483 Do you guys think it's strange that she got killed 221 00:13:48,578 --> 00:13:53,914 exactly one year after we, you know, killed that guy? 222 00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:56,666 Hey! Cindy, that was an accident. 223 00:13:56,753 --> 00:13:58,915 Was it, Greg? 224 00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:04,749 [GREG] Yeah! Yeah! 225 00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,342 [GREG LAUGHING] 226 00:14:15,938 --> 00:14:18,100 Would you look at what they're doing? 227 00:14:18,149 --> 00:14:20,937 When are we gonna do stuff like that, huh? 228 00:14:21,027 --> 00:14:22,984 One day. 229 00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:25,608 - You like that, baby? - Yeah, that's different. 230 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,985 - You like that? - Oh, I love that. 231 00:14:28,076 --> 00:14:30,568 Oh, I love when you play with my ass. 232 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:33,533 I'm not playing with your ass. 233 00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:36,948 - Ray! - Oh, my bad. 234 00:14:37,001 --> 00:14:38,207 [POP] 235 00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:40,126 Come on, man! 236 00:14:40,171 --> 00:14:42,913 Hey, Bobby, put on some music. 237 00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:46,087 Hold on. Here, put this on. 238 00:14:48,471 --> 00:14:50,712 ♪ [IT'S RAINING MEN BY THE WEATHER GIRLS] ♪ 239 00:14:50,807 --> 00:14:53,344 Yeah, that's the shit right here! Whoo! 240 00:14:53,434 --> 00:14:55,971 ♪ - Hallelujah ♪ ♪ - It's raining men ♪ 241 00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:58,637 ♪ - Baby! ♪ ♪ - Amen ♪ 242 00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:02,808 ♪ - I'm gonna go out... ♪ ♪ - What? It's a classic. ♪ 243 00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:06,854 ♪ - Absolutely soaking wet ♪ ♪ - Put on the radio, man. ♪ 244 00:15:06,948 --> 00:15:09,440 ♪ [EVERYBODY WANTS YOU BY THE UNBAND] ♪ 245 00:15:09,492 --> 00:15:11,984 Yeah! Whoo! 246 00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:28,375 - What? It was laundry day. - What the fuck is...? 247 00:15:28,803 --> 00:15:30,510 Yeah! 248 00:15:30,596 --> 00:15:33,179 Whoo! 249 00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:36,224 Yeah! 250 00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:37,345 Whoo! 251 00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,348 Hey, come over here. 252 00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:42,522 - What? - Just get a little closer to me. 253 00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:46,276 - Something you're gonna tell me? - [UNZIPS ZIP] 254 00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:49,445 - Bobby, what are you doing?! - I just want you to touch it. 255 00:15:50,324 --> 00:15:52,486 - Uh... - Just a little bit. Come on. 256 00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:54,276 Whoo! 257 00:15:57,206 --> 00:16:01,200 - Ow! - Oh, yeah, that's what I'm talking about. 258 00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:14,004 Oh, my God! Shit! 259 00:16:14,682 --> 00:16:16,798 God, Cindy... 260 00:16:16,893 --> 00:16:18,509 Oh, shit! 261 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:32,063 - [RAY] Oh, my God. - What was that? 262 00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:34,570 I think we hit something. 263 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,697 Oh, man! 264 00:16:41,751 --> 00:16:45,585 Bobby, look at my car, man! My dad's gonna freak! 265 00:16:45,671 --> 00:16:48,208 [BOBBY] I didn't see it. It came out of nowhere. 266 00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:51,295 - Oh, my God, we hit a boot! - Where's the foot? 267 00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:53,467 I don't know. 268 00:16:53,554 --> 00:16:55,636 Where the...? 269 00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,965 - [SCREAMS] - Agh, it's a body! 270 00:16:59,060 --> 00:17:01,097 - Oh, shit. Is he alive? - I don't know. 271 00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,178 - Well, check it out! - I can't. 272 00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:06,060 - Shit! - We have to call the police. 273 00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:08,600 - No way. I ain't going to jail. - We have to! 274 00:17:08,653 --> 00:17:11,896 Hey, Cindy, do you know what they do to young boys in prison? 275 00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:15,907 All those sex-starved convicts just waiting for a fresh piece of meat. 276 00:17:15,952 --> 00:17:19,741 - Maybe we should call the police. - [GREG] Yeah, that's a great idea. 277 00:17:19,789 --> 00:17:22,030 What about Brenda? Think she wants to go to jail? 278 00:17:22,124 --> 00:17:24,707 This is manslaughter. We're all gonna fry for this. 279 00:17:24,794 --> 00:17:28,037 - We're looking at 10 to 15 years. - Shut up, Bobby! 280 00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:30,246 - Alcohol all over... - I'm fine. 281 00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:32,791 - [CINDY] We're in so much trouble. - I'm fine. 282 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:34,629 [BRENDA] Don't blame it on me, Ray. 283 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:38,759 - Look, we'll get rid of the body. - Unnecessary. 284 00:17:38,808 --> 00:17:41,391 - We'll dump him in the ocean. - [BRENDA] No, the pier. 285 00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:43,764 - I'll be leaving now. - [GREG] Great idea. 286 00:17:43,813 --> 00:17:46,896 - What about the alcohol? - We'll get rid of it. 287 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:50,354 - Hurry up, let's go. - Put him in the trunk. 288 00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:52,856 - I won't have anything to do with it! - [GREG] Shut up! 289 00:17:52,947 --> 00:17:56,485 Cindy, come on. We'll just pretend it never happened. 290 00:17:56,534 --> 00:17:59,868 You know, like the time we got drunk and we went down on each other. 291 00:17:59,954 --> 00:18:01,786 - I'll get his arm. - I'll grab his other arm. 292 00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:03,663 I'll grab his ass. 293 00:18:03,708 --> 00:18:06,166 We'll take him to Williamson Cove and dump him. 294 00:18:06,210 --> 00:18:09,123 The sharks'|| take care of the evidence. 295 00:18:09,171 --> 00:18:11,503 Oh, my God, someone's coming! 296 00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:14,632 - Oh, shit. It's Shorty. - Brenda, take care of him. 297 00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:19,133 ♪ [RAP ON RADIO] ♪ 298 00:18:20,975 --> 00:18:24,013 Shorty, I know you ain't driving without no papers. 299 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:27,061 I got papers, blunts, bongs - 300 00:18:27,148 --> 00:18:29,685 all the ingredients to make a high-nigger pie. 301 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:31,561 [SCREECHING LAUGHTER] 302 00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:35,145 - Hey, yo, can I help you? - Yo, what's up, Ray? 303 00:18:35,197 --> 00:18:37,905 - Yo, son, y'all need jumper cables? - Nah, we're cool. 304 00:18:37,992 --> 00:18:41,201 Oh, good, cos I left my roach clip at home. 305 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:45,034 - Go home, Shorty. - Yeah. I'll see you later. 306 00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:46,916 Peace, Ray. 307 00:18:47,001 --> 00:18:49,584 - Get the trunk closed. - [BUFFY] It won't close. 308 00:18:50,171 --> 00:18:52,333 - I'll do it. - [GROANING] 309 00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:54,998 [SHORTY AND FRIENDS LAUGHING] 310 00:19:17,073 --> 00:19:19,861 Hold on, hold on. Put him down - he's heavy. 311 00:19:19,909 --> 00:19:22,150 Oh, Jesus! 312 00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:25,862 OK, look. On three, we dump him over the ledge. 313 00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:28,282 Wait. Shouldn't we at least check his wallet? 314 00:19:28,376 --> 00:19:32,210 - For what? - Shit, he might have some money. 315 00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:35,167 We already committed murder. We might as well rob his ass. 316 00:19:35,257 --> 00:19:36,964 - Credit cards. - Jewellery. 317 00:19:37,051 --> 00:19:39,884 - I'm gonna take his drawers. - [ALL SHOUT AT ONCE] 318 00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:43,172 Hey, yo, get off! His drawers are mine! Yo! 319 00:19:44,392 --> 00:19:46,884 - [CHUCKLING] I got me a gold ring. - Credit cards. 320 00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:50,520 - All right, let's get him in the water. - I don't think I can, Greg. 321 00:19:50,606 --> 00:19:53,064 - It's not too late. - Shut up, OK? 322 00:19:53,109 --> 00:19:57,103 - Christ, already! I'll do it. - Just get him in the water. 323 00:19:57,154 --> 00:20:00,272 OK? One, two... 324 00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:02,357 three. 325 00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:09,698 Right now we make a pact. We take this to our grave. 326 00:20:09,792 --> 00:20:11,703 - Agreed? - Agreed. 327 00:20:11,794 --> 00:20:13,751 - Agreed'? - [BRENDA, BOBBY] Agreed. 328 00:20:13,796 --> 00:20:16,959 Say it, Cindy. Say it! 329 00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:22,420 We take this to our grave - say it! 330 00:20:22,471 --> 00:20:26,806 - Greg, chill. You're hurting her. - We take this to our grave. 331 00:20:26,851 --> 00:20:27,761 Ow! 332 00:20:27,810 --> 00:20:32,520 - And we never mention this again. - Mention what? 333 00:20:32,606 --> 00:20:34,893 The guy we just killed! 334 00:20:34,984 --> 00:20:39,069 - Well, you just mentioned it, Greg. - Starting now! 335 00:20:39,989 --> 00:20:43,323 - Stupid bitch, man. - [WHISPERS] God, I hate him. 336 00:20:43,409 --> 00:20:46,697 It's gonna be OK, baby. It's gonna be OK. I promise. 337 00:20:46,787 --> 00:20:50,030 Just touch it again. Come on. Please? 338 00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:55,456 You have to move on, Cindy. That's all behind us now. 339 00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:57,791 Exactly. It's a coincidence. 340 00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:01,754 Greg's right, Cindy. I mean, what do you think we're in, a horror movie? 341 00:21:01,844 --> 00:21:02,844 [LAUGHTER] 342 00:21:02,887 --> 00:21:05,504 Yeah, you guys are right. If we were, 343 00:21:05,598 --> 00:21:10,343 they'd probably cast some dingbat like Jennifer Love Huge Tits to play me. 344 00:21:10,436 --> 00:21:15,272 Yeah, or they'd cast people in their late twenties, early thirties to play us. 345 00:21:15,357 --> 00:21:16,357 [BELL RINGS] 346 00:21:17,151 --> 00:21:21,019 Kenny, get the camera ready. Here, hold my gum. 347 00:21:22,406 --> 00:21:25,615 - Hi. Sheriff, can I get a statement? - No comment. 348 00:21:25,701 --> 00:21:31,071 Damn! Who do I have to screw around here to get a stupid story? 349 00:21:31,165 --> 00:21:33,372 Hey! Hey, no running! 350 00:21:33,417 --> 00:21:35,533 [BLOWS WHISTLE] 351 00:21:35,586 --> 00:21:37,577 Loser. 352 00:21:37,671 --> 00:21:40,163 - Slow it down! - [BOY] Blow me! 353 00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:42,175 All right! 354 00:21:43,469 --> 00:21:46,006 Hi. Gail Hailstorm - field reporter, Hard Story. 355 00:21:46,055 --> 00:21:49,389 - Special Officer Doofy. - Hi, Doofy. 356 00:21:49,475 --> 00:21:52,342 Doofy, listen. Is there a problem on campus? 357 00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:54,681 - No comment. No comment. - OK. OK. 358 00:21:55,231 --> 00:21:58,394 You know, you look awfully young to be a police officer. 359 00:21:58,484 --> 00:22:00,725 - I'm 25 and a half years old. - Ooh! 360 00:22:00,778 --> 00:22:02,985 - Yeah, that's this many. - Ah, so big! 361 00:22:03,072 --> 00:22:05,063 Yeah. That's big. 362 00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:08,073 Well, you don't look a day over 12. 363 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:12,119 Except for the big head and glazed-over look in your eyes. 364 00:22:12,206 --> 00:22:15,790 - Ooh, was that drool? - Yeah. I forgot to swallow. 365 00:22:15,876 --> 00:22:18,334 Don't worry, cos I never forget. 366 00:22:19,964 --> 00:22:20,999 [FARTS] 367 00:22:21,090 --> 00:22:23,832 - Remind me not to do that again. - Sorry. 368 00:22:23,926 --> 00:22:29,217 [MAN OVER PA] Due to the recent tragedy, we will be questioning all students. 369 00:22:29,265 --> 00:22:32,098 Sounds like we've got a serial killer on our hands. 370 00:22:32,184 --> 00:22:35,302 I'm not supposed to say. It's official police business. 371 00:22:35,396 --> 00:22:39,390 Hey, Doofy, what do you say you and I go inside my van over there 372 00:22:39,441 --> 00:22:42,775 and get to know each other a little better? Would you like that? 373 00:22:42,820 --> 00:22:46,063 - That van? - Yeah, that van right there. 374 00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:47,571 [CHUCKLES] 375 00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:50,699 Yeah. Yeah, OK, let's go. 376 00:22:50,786 --> 00:22:52,242 Come on. 377 00:22:52,288 --> 00:22:56,031 A terrible tragedy and an unbearable loss. 378 00:22:56,125 --> 00:23:00,369 It's days like today that we need prayer in school. 379 00:23:00,462 --> 00:23:05,798 It starts to unravel the very moral fabric of our society. 380 00:23:05,843 --> 00:23:07,880 - Here you go, baby. - [SUCKING NOISE] 381 00:23:07,970 --> 00:23:09,961 Go to your daddy. 382 00:23:11,098 --> 00:23:12,463 Oh! 383 00:23:12,975 --> 00:23:15,592 [CHUCKLES] I'll see you after class. 384 00:23:15,644 --> 00:23:17,134 - Sweet! - All right! 385 00:23:17,187 --> 00:23:21,647 OK, class, who would like to give their oral presentation first? 386 00:23:22,401 --> 00:23:24,563 Oh! 387 00:23:24,653 --> 00:23:27,691 - Yes! - Anybody else! 388 00:23:28,824 --> 00:23:30,531 - [MOUTHS] - OK, Heather. 389 00:23:31,410 --> 00:23:32,741 Yes! 390 00:23:35,289 --> 00:23:37,656 - OK. Can I start? - Yeah. 391 00:23:37,750 --> 00:23:40,708 OK, my presentation is on the First Amendment, 392 00:23:40,794 --> 00:23:45,334 and it began on May 25th, 1787, in Philly with George Washington, 393 00:23:45,382 --> 00:23:47,123 and it states, and I quote: 394 00:23:47,176 --> 00:23:50,885 When our Founding Fathers argued the passage of our glorious... 395 00:23:50,971 --> 00:23:54,054 [HEATHER CONTINUES, INDISTINCT] 396 00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:14,033 [ROMANTIC MUSICAL INTERLUDE] 397 00:24:40,521 --> 00:24:44,105 The First Amendment gives us the right to say what we want... 398 00:24:44,191 --> 00:24:47,149 Oh, shut the fuck up! 399 00:24:47,236 --> 00:24:50,570 - So... who's next? - [PUTTS BALL] 400 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:53,277 Uh, Cindy Campbell. 401 00:24:53,367 --> 00:24:57,076 Isn't she the daughter of...? Well, you know... 402 00:24:57,162 --> 00:25:00,700 - Oh, yeah, you know, Mrs... - Mrs... 403 00:25:01,625 --> 00:25:03,616 [SHERIFF] Yeah, the one and only... 404 00:25:03,711 --> 00:25:05,577 The one and only. 405 00:25:07,214 --> 00:25:10,878 - [CLEARS THROAT] Why, hello, Cindy. - Hi, Principal Squiggman. 406 00:25:10,926 --> 00:25:15,215 - Thanks, Doofy. - It's Special Officer Doofy today, Cind. 407 00:25:16,015 --> 00:25:19,679 Now, the sheriff has some questions that he would like to ask you today. 408 00:25:19,768 --> 00:25:23,261 - What is that... that god-awful smell? - I don't know. 409 00:25:23,355 --> 00:25:25,767 I go poopie. 410 00:25:25,858 --> 00:25:28,771 Did you just say that you, uh... you went poopie? 411 00:25:28,861 --> 00:25:31,944 - Yeah. It was good. - [SHERIFF] Mm. 412 00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:34,363 - Get him out of here. - Yes. 413 00:25:35,409 --> 00:25:37,946 - Thank you, Doofy. - OK. 414 00:25:38,037 --> 00:25:40,324 You should now go back to Special Ed. 415 00:25:40,414 --> 00:25:44,078 - OK. Salute. - Maybe a change of underwear, son. 416 00:25:44,626 --> 00:25:47,368 - Bye, Doofy. - Bye, Cind. 417 00:25:48,213 --> 00:25:50,204 - How are you, Cindy? - Fine. 418 00:25:50,299 --> 00:25:53,212 - How are you, Sheriff? - Bloated, constipated. 419 00:25:53,302 --> 00:25:56,886 Got a boil on my ass the size of a walnut. You know, the usual. 420 00:25:56,972 --> 00:26:01,261 Cindy, I want to ask you some questions about Drew Decker. 421 00:26:01,310 --> 00:26:04,428 - I didn't really know her. - Come on, sure you did. 422 00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:06,892 No. I mean, I didn't really know her. 423 00:26:06,982 --> 00:26:12,148 I've been in this game a long time. Don't bullshit a bullshitter. Tell me about Drew. 424 00:26:12,196 --> 00:26:14,312 What was she like in bed, Cindy? 425 00:26:15,449 --> 00:26:18,111 Ha! Tried to get you. 426 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:22,245 It's an old police trick. You didn't fall for it. Good for you, kid. 427 00:26:22,331 --> 00:26:24,163 Hike! 428 00:26:25,167 --> 00:26:26,783 Pass! Pass! 429 00:26:29,922 --> 00:26:32,539 - [WHISTLE BLOWS] - All right, shower up! 430 00:26:32,633 --> 00:26:34,590 Yes! 431 00:26:34,676 --> 00:26:38,169 Yo, Dugan, man. Nice play, yo. Word up. 432 00:26:38,222 --> 00:26:41,055 Johnson! What a block, baby. Word up. 433 00:26:41,141 --> 00:26:43,348 Woodward! Nice ass. 434 00:26:44,436 --> 00:26:46,598 Damn! 435 00:26:46,688 --> 00:26:50,147 Yo, Greg, what's up? You gonna hit the showers or what? 436 00:26:50,192 --> 00:26:53,981 No, man. I think I'm gonna work out, beat the bag a little. 437 00:26:54,029 --> 00:26:56,111 Suit yourself, kid. All right! 438 00:26:56,198 --> 00:26:59,862 Last one in the shower's a rotten egg! Come on, y'all. 439 00:26:59,952 --> 00:27:02,535 I'm gonna get y'all. [GIGGLING] 440 00:27:02,621 --> 00:27:05,659 Don't let Uncle Ray catch you! 441 00:27:28,772 --> 00:27:31,104 Who did this?! Huh? 442 00:27:31,191 --> 00:27:33,228 Where are you? 443 00:27:33,318 --> 00:27:35,650 This isn't funny, all right? 444 00:27:35,737 --> 00:27:38,695 A small dick's like a disability, man! 445 00:27:38,740 --> 00:27:42,904 Would you make fun of a guy in a wheelchair? Huh? Would you? 446 00:27:42,953 --> 00:27:45,320 Come on out here, you sick fuck! 447 00:27:45,414 --> 00:27:48,372 I'll kick the shit out of you right now! 448 00:27:48,417 --> 00:27:49,828 All right? 449 00:27:49,918 --> 00:27:53,627 It's not the size of the hammer, it's the nail you're throwing it at! 450 00:27:56,758 --> 00:28:00,251 It's a shame how she died. She was such a nice girl. 451 00:28:00,304 --> 00:28:04,593 She used to baby-sit my brother Doofy. He had the biggest crush on her. 452 00:28:05,267 --> 00:28:07,053 Ray, you're a dead man! 453 00:28:07,102 --> 00:28:11,642 - Hey, hey, hey, hey. Chill out. - You wanna get butt-naked and wrestle? 454 00:28:11,732 --> 00:28:14,770 - Bring it on, Ray! - Hold my earrings. Where's my Vaseline? 455 00:28:14,818 --> 00:28:18,777 - Take it easy. What's the problem? - I'll show you the problem. 456 00:28:18,864 --> 00:28:20,980 Oh, wow! That's you? 457 00:28:21,408 --> 00:28:25,868 They... they turned the hot water off in the showers, all right? 458 00:28:28,957 --> 00:28:32,166 Laugh it up, you guys. Big laugh. 459 00:28:33,712 --> 00:28:36,124 You know what? You can all go to hell! 460 00:28:36,173 --> 00:28:39,666 Greg, you're not the only one who got one. 461 00:28:40,886 --> 00:28:43,127 You mean Bobby's got a baby dick, too? 462 00:28:45,641 --> 00:28:48,508 No, I was talking about the note. 463 00:28:48,602 --> 00:28:50,639 I got one, too. 464 00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:53,562 - Somebody knows. - That's bullshit, Cindy. 465 00:28:53,649 --> 00:28:55,686 Someone's just trying to fuck with us. 466 00:28:55,776 --> 00:28:58,108 We have to call the police, Greg. 467 00:28:58,153 --> 00:29:01,271 You call the police, and I'll kill you myself. 468 00:29:08,497 --> 00:29:12,741 - You're hurting her, man. - You know what? That goes for all of you. 469 00:29:12,834 --> 00:29:15,576 That psycho wants a piece of me, bring it on! 470 00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:18,538 But I'm not going to jail. You got that? 471 00:29:18,632 --> 00:29:20,418 [CINDY GROANING] 472 00:29:20,509 --> 00:29:22,500 [BONES CRUNCHING] 473 00:29:26,890 --> 00:29:29,097 What's everybody talking about? 474 00:29:29,184 --> 00:29:33,018 Just forget it, Shorty. You already know too much. 475 00:29:34,022 --> 00:29:37,014 - [AUDIENCE CHEERING] - Aren't they beautiful? 476 00:29:38,527 --> 00:29:41,519 - Buffy! - Contestant number one! 477 00:29:44,658 --> 00:29:47,867 Very good. And contestant number two. 478 00:29:52,165 --> 00:29:55,157 Very good. And contestant number three. 479 00:29:55,210 --> 00:29:58,578 [GREG] Buffy! That's my girl! 480 00:29:58,672 --> 00:30:01,960 - That's my girlfriend! - Yeah, that's my girlfriend too! 481 00:30:02,050 --> 00:30:05,338 - Hey, kiss my ass! - [BOY 2] Yeah, I'm hitting that too! 482 00:30:05,387 --> 00:30:08,220 - All right, Buffy! - Hey, shut the hell up, man! 483 00:30:08,265 --> 00:30:11,883 - [BOY 3] Yeah, best pussy I ever had! - What, you want a piece of me? 484 00:30:11,977 --> 00:30:14,218 Now the talent portion of the competition. 485 00:30:14,271 --> 00:30:17,889 Oh, you guys, I'm gonna go downstairs for a closer seat. See you after the show. 486 00:30:17,983 --> 00:30:21,817 - Number three, Buffy Gilmore. - [APPLAUSE] 487 00:30:21,903 --> 00:30:24,270 I'm gonna hit the head. Want anything? 488 00:30:24,364 --> 00:30:27,072 No, I'm good, man. But hurry, she's gonna perform. 489 00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:28,866 Don't worry, I'll be back. 490 00:30:28,910 --> 00:30:32,119 Good evening, Buffy. And what will be your talent this evening? 491 00:30:32,205 --> 00:30:36,244 Acting. I'll be doing a dramatic reading. 492 00:30:36,335 --> 00:30:38,167 [BOY] Hear, hear! 493 00:30:38,253 --> 00:30:40,494 Buffy Gilmore, doing a dramatic reading. 494 00:30:42,257 --> 00:30:45,875 Hey, do that thing from Baywatch. She's running down the beach... 495 00:30:52,726 --> 00:30:54,808 Look out, Greg! Look behind you! 496 00:30:56,355 --> 00:30:58,266 It's him! It's the killer! 497 00:30:58,315 --> 00:30:59,180 Huh? 498 00:30:59,274 --> 00:31:02,232 Oh, my God! Somebody do something! 499 00:31:02,277 --> 00:31:05,770 - Somebody do something! - [MURMURING] 500 00:31:05,864 --> 00:31:08,071 He's killing him! 501 00:31:08,116 --> 00:31:10,983 - He's killing him! - Must be an original piece. 502 00:31:11,078 --> 00:31:12,989 He's killing him! 503 00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:14,787 [SOBBING] 504 00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:16,659 She's good. She's good. 505 00:31:16,750 --> 00:31:19,617 - What's wrong with you people? - That's fantastic. 506 00:31:19,711 --> 00:31:23,079 You fucking bastards! Why won't anyone help? 507 00:31:23,131 --> 00:31:25,998 - Amazing. - [WOMAN] She's the next Pamela Lee. 508 00:31:26,093 --> 00:31:29,085 Oh, God... Oh, God! No! 509 00:31:30,055 --> 00:31:32,342 Greg, don't die! 510 00:31:34,267 --> 00:31:36,759 [EMCEE] Give it up for Buffy Gilmore! Wonderful! 511 00:31:36,812 --> 00:31:38,974 Absolutely fantastic! 512 00:31:42,109 --> 00:31:45,977 I think we have a winner, ladies and gentlemen. Miss Buffy Gilmore! 513 00:31:46,071 --> 00:31:48,859 Buffy, wait! You have to go back on stage. 514 00:31:48,949 --> 00:31:51,987 - I have to get to Greg. - You won! They're calling your name. 515 00:31:52,035 --> 00:31:55,494 There's a killer... I won? 516 00:31:55,580 --> 00:31:58,538 - They're calling your name. Go. - What about Greg? 517 00:31:58,625 --> 00:32:00,741 - Fuck Greg! I won! - Congratulations! 518 00:32:00,836 --> 00:32:02,702 Out of my way, loser! 519 00:32:02,796 --> 00:32:05,413 - Miss Buffy Gilmore! - [APPLAUSE AND CHEERING] 520 00:32:05,507 --> 00:32:07,214 ♪ Here she comes ♪ 521 00:32:07,300 --> 00:32:10,292 ♪ Miss Teen, she's so fine ♪ 522 00:32:10,345 --> 00:32:13,258 ♪ - Such lovely tits ♪ ♪ - Give me my crown, bitch. ♪ 523 00:32:13,348 --> 00:32:16,431 ♪ And a great behind ♪ 524 00:32:16,518 --> 00:32:21,058 ♪ There she is, ♪ ♪ doggy style any time ♪ 525 00:32:21,148 --> 00:32:25,893 ♪ And I'll do her behind, ♪ ♪ behind and behind ♪ 526 00:32:25,986 --> 00:32:28,648 ♪ Oh, there she is ♪ 527 00:32:28,697 --> 00:32:31,405 ♪ - She loves 69... ♪ ♪ - Agh! ♪ 528 00:32:32,409 --> 00:32:36,027 - There's no sign of him anywhere. - He could've taken the body. 529 00:32:36,121 --> 00:32:39,079 That's impossible. There's no blood, nothing. Look around. 530 00:32:39,166 --> 00:32:42,033 I bet it's just Greg playing one of his dumb jokes. 531 00:32:42,085 --> 00:32:47,205 He'll turn up, I'm sure of it. He's probably at my house waiting for us right now. 532 00:32:47,299 --> 00:32:52,089 All right. But I'm gonna look around some more, so you mind riding home with Buffy? 533 00:32:52,179 --> 00:32:54,216 - Yeah, no problem. - All right, fine. 534 00:32:54,264 --> 00:32:55,800 Call me later. 535 00:33:05,233 --> 00:33:07,691 [HUMMING] 536 00:33:11,448 --> 00:33:13,610 [PHONE RINGS] 537 00:33:17,287 --> 00:33:20,245 - Hello. - [SINISTER VOICE] Hello, Cindy. 538 00:33:20,332 --> 00:33:23,040 - Who is this? - [NORMAL] It's me, Bobby. 539 00:33:23,084 --> 00:33:25,576 You know, your boyfriend. 540 00:33:25,670 --> 00:33:29,629 Yeah, I'm sorry. I guess I'm a little jumpy lately. 541 00:33:29,716 --> 00:33:33,175 - Hey, any sign of Greg? - No. 542 00:33:33,261 --> 00:33:35,673 - Do you want me to come by? - No. 543 00:33:36,556 --> 00:33:39,890 I'm just gonna take a bath and then I'm gonna go to bed. 544 00:33:39,935 --> 00:33:43,724 OK. I'd really like to see you, but... I love you. 545 00:33:43,772 --> 00:33:45,103 Aw... 546 00:33:45,148 --> 00:33:47,606 I love you too, baby. 547 00:33:58,245 --> 00:34:00,407 [FARTS] 548 00:34:02,916 --> 00:34:05,078 [SNIFFS] 549 00:34:05,794 --> 00:34:07,956 [PHONE RINGS] 550 00:34:09,881 --> 00:34:11,542 Bobby, I told you... 551 00:34:11,633 --> 00:34:14,125 [man] I still know what you did last Halloween. 552 00:34:14,177 --> 00:34:16,043 - Who is this? - [LINE GOES DEAD] 553 00:34:23,270 --> 00:34:25,261 [PHONE RINGS] 554 00:34:27,107 --> 00:34:28,723 - [SCREAMS] - [THUD] 555 00:34:28,817 --> 00:34:31,855 - OW! Ow! - [PHONE STILL RINGING] 556 00:34:35,865 --> 00:34:38,277 - Hello. - I'm gonna kill you. 557 00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:40,488 - I'm gonna slice you up. - Who is this? 558 00:34:40,579 --> 00:34:43,196 - I'm gonna chop you like liver. - What do you want? 559 00:34:43,290 --> 00:34:45,748 I'm in the house. [sniggers] 560 00:34:46,376 --> 00:34:49,619 - Do you know where I am? [sniggers] - [GASPS] 561 00:34:50,755 --> 00:34:52,337 I could be anywhere. 562 00:34:52,382 --> 00:34:54,840 I'm like the wind, baby. 563 00:34:54,884 --> 00:34:56,420 Yeah... 564 00:34:56,511 --> 00:34:57,842 Where am I? 565 00:34:58,096 --> 00:35:00,303 [SNIGGERING] 566 00:35:00,348 --> 00:35:01,213 Um... 567 00:35:01,308 --> 00:35:03,174 You're... you're behind the couch. 568 00:35:03,226 --> 00:35:04,887 [SNIGGERING STOPS] 569 00:35:05,145 --> 00:35:06,886 What? How do you know that? 570 00:35:06,980 --> 00:35:08,891 I can see your feet. 571 00:35:10,525 --> 00:35:12,516 Ash... 572 00:35:12,569 --> 00:35:14,230 OK, turn around. 573 00:35:14,321 --> 00:35:16,904 Close your eyes. No peeking. 574 00:35:21,161 --> 00:35:23,619 Yeah. No. No, no. 575 00:35:25,290 --> 00:35:28,203 Hey, no peeking. Turn around. 576 00:35:28,293 --> 00:35:29,954 Good. 577 00:35:30,045 --> 00:35:32,161 OK, now you can look. 578 00:35:32,213 --> 00:35:35,080 Now do you know where I am? You don't. 579 00:35:35,925 --> 00:35:39,213 No, Mr Killer, I don't know where you are. 580 00:35:39,304 --> 00:35:41,545 I'll give you a big clue. 581 00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:43,551 [SCREAMS] 582 00:35:45,268 --> 00:35:47,555 Oh! I gotta stop drinking. 583 00:35:54,486 --> 00:35:56,397 - Grandma! - Hi, baby. 584 00:35:56,446 --> 00:35:58,904 Oh, my hip! 585 00:36:08,750 --> 00:36:09,750 [SCREAMS] 586 00:36:18,593 --> 00:36:20,584 [SCREAMS] 587 00:36:27,769 --> 00:36:31,808 [DISPATCHER] White woman in trouble off the 744... 588 00:36:31,898 --> 00:36:34,310 [SIRENS WAILING] 589 00:36:36,611 --> 00:36:38,318 [TWIGS SNAPPING] 590 00:36:38,738 --> 00:36:41,776 Are you OK? I heard screaming. What's going on? 591 00:36:41,866 --> 00:36:44,233 - Bobby! He was here! - Shh... 592 00:36:44,285 --> 00:36:47,778 - The killer was here, Bobby. - It's OK. 593 00:36:54,713 --> 00:36:57,796 - I can explain that. - Oh, my God... 594 00:36:58,591 --> 00:37:01,504 A friend gave 'em to me. Cindy... Cindy... 595 00:37:01,845 --> 00:37:03,882 - [SCREAMS] - Cindy! Cindy! 596 00:37:03,972 --> 00:37:06,964 Cindy! Cindy! Cindy! 597 00:37:11,521 --> 00:37:13,808 It's me, Cind. Ugh! 598 00:37:13,898 --> 00:37:16,606 Cindy, you know me! Cindy! 599 00:37:22,907 --> 00:37:25,695 I know you've had a rough night, so I won't keep you. 600 00:37:25,785 --> 00:37:29,995 I just want you to look at some photos, tell me what you think. 601 00:37:35,003 --> 00:37:36,835 Uh-uh. 602 00:37:38,673 --> 00:37:40,710 - No? - No. 603 00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:44,969 - I'm sorry, Sheriff. - You're sure? 604 00:37:45,805 --> 00:37:48,888 OK, you're free to go. Do you have somebody picking you up? 605 00:37:48,975 --> 00:37:51,342 - Yeah. - Oh, just... 606 00:37:52,353 --> 00:37:54,640 Just check that one out again. 607 00:37:55,857 --> 00:38:00,272 - Mm, no. - No? Well, worth a shot. All right, thanks. 608 00:38:01,112 --> 00:38:03,854 - Guess what I just did with those hookers. - No way. 609 00:38:03,948 --> 00:38:06,986 All the way, man! Yes, yes. Watch this. Doofy! 610 00:38:07,035 --> 00:38:09,322 - Yeah? - Come on. Come on. 611 00:38:09,370 --> 00:38:10,952 OK. 612 00:38:11,748 --> 00:38:13,910 Special Officer Doofy reporting. 613 00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:16,537 Hey, Doofy, smell my fingers. 614 00:38:17,462 --> 00:38:18,873 What's that? 615 00:38:18,963 --> 00:38:22,206 That's when you know you've become a man, Doofy! 616 00:38:22,300 --> 00:38:24,382 Hey, Terry, smell my finger. 617 00:38:24,469 --> 00:38:27,177 - Ugh! What the hell is that? - My ass. 618 00:38:27,222 --> 00:38:31,136 - Get the hell out of here, Doofy. - Doofy, Mom said get home now. 619 00:38:31,726 --> 00:38:34,218 Tell Mom I'm on official police business. 620 00:38:34,270 --> 00:38:38,059 - Cindy, are you OK? - Hey, hey, hey. No talking to the witness. 621 00:38:38,149 --> 00:38:41,062 - Go get in the car. She's coming with us. - Does Mom know? 622 00:38:41,110 --> 00:38:42,396 Yeah, Doofus. 623 00:38:42,487 --> 00:38:46,230 Mom says when I wear this badge you should treat me like a man of the law. 624 00:38:46,324 --> 00:38:49,737 Mom also said for you to stop sticking your dick in the vacuum cleaner. 625 00:38:49,786 --> 00:38:52,574 [GENERAL AMUSEMENT] 626 00:38:53,248 --> 00:38:55,080 OK, three, two... 627 00:38:55,124 --> 00:38:57,536 - [KENNY] Oh, no... Gosh damn... - What now? 628 00:38:57,585 --> 00:38:59,917 - There's all these numbers... - Can't you count? 629 00:39:00,004 --> 00:39:03,247 - I can count, but... - Let me make it easy for you. Listen up. 630 00:39:03,341 --> 00:39:06,675 This little piggy went to market. This little piggy stayed home. 631 00:39:06,761 --> 00:39:09,753 Now, if this little piggy doesn't roll the god damn camera... 632 00:39:09,848 --> 00:39:11,179 We're live, Gail. 633 00:39:11,266 --> 00:39:16,102 Gail Hailstorm at the police station, where I'll try to get a glimpse of Cindy Campbell, 634 00:39:16,187 --> 00:39:18,895 the young girl who was attacked earlier this evening... 635 00:39:18,940 --> 00:39:23,150 - You're on my foot, fat shit! What'd I say? - Don't ever step on Gail's shoes. 636 00:39:23,236 --> 00:39:25,273 - Why not? - Cos Gail wears Prada shoes. 637 00:39:25,363 --> 00:39:27,604 - You idiot. - I'm a bad man. 638 00:39:27,657 --> 00:39:30,399 [REPORTERS] Cindy! Cindy, can we get a statement? 639 00:39:30,451 --> 00:39:32,783 Buffy Gilmore, Miss Teen. She's not talking. 640 00:39:32,871 --> 00:39:35,203 Is it true the police have someone in custody? 641 00:39:35,290 --> 00:39:38,578 - Come on, Cindy. - Cindy, your ass looks fat! 642 00:39:40,295 --> 00:39:42,127 Bitch! 643 00:39:42,589 --> 00:39:44,796 - Nice shot! - Come on. 644 00:39:44,883 --> 00:39:47,841 - All right, who copped a feel? - Gail, it was me. 645 00:39:47,927 --> 00:39:50,965 - Oh, my God. - It was an accident, Gail. 646 00:39:51,055 --> 00:39:53,922 I only touched the top of the breast. 647 00:39:53,975 --> 00:39:56,137 - It was so tender and juicy... - Shut up! 648 00:39:56,185 --> 00:39:58,267 [DIAL TONE] 649 00:40:00,982 --> 00:40:03,223 [PHONE RINGS] 650 00:40:05,111 --> 00:40:08,729 - Yo. - Hello, Shorty. What are you doing? 651 00:40:08,823 --> 00:40:14,569 Nothing. Sitting here watching the game, smoking some bud. 652 00:40:15,496 --> 00:40:17,578 Are you all alone? 653 00:40:17,665 --> 00:40:20,953 - Wassup! - Wassup! 654 00:40:21,210 --> 00:40:23,827 What the...? Who's that? 655 00:40:23,922 --> 00:40:26,789 Yo, pick up the phone. 656 00:40:26,841 --> 00:40:29,924 - Wassup! - Wassup! 657 00:40:30,011 --> 00:40:32,093 [ALL YELL] 658 00:40:32,180 --> 00:40:35,969 Yo, Dookie, pick up the phone! 659 00:40:36,017 --> 00:40:38,054 - Yo. - Wassup! 660 00:40:38,144 --> 00:40:40,135 [ALL YELL] 661 00:40:46,903 --> 00:40:52,524 - What you doing, son? - Nothing... Just chilling... killing... 662 00:40:52,617 --> 00:40:55,279 True. True. 663 00:40:55,954 --> 00:40:58,571 So you think Bobby did it? 664 00:41:00,708 --> 00:41:03,996 I don't know. But he was there, Buffy. 665 00:41:04,045 --> 00:41:08,039 I knew there had to be something. He's just too perfect. 666 00:41:08,132 --> 00:41:11,591 Handsome, smart, good in bed... 667 00:41:12,553 --> 00:41:15,341 - What did you say? - Uh... 668 00:41:16,057 --> 00:41:19,175 Hey, Cind. Got you an ice pack for your hand. 669 00:41:19,352 --> 00:41:20,513 Ow! 670 00:41:20,561 --> 00:41:22,017 Sorry. 671 00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:24,687 I'll get you one for your head. 672 00:41:24,732 --> 00:41:27,099 No, no, that's OK, Doofy. 673 00:41:27,193 --> 00:41:31,733 Hey, we're gonna get that guy you dumped in the water. Yeah. 674 00:41:31,781 --> 00:41:34,489 I'll be next door if you need me. 675 00:41:34,575 --> 00:41:36,566 Night, Cind. 676 00:41:37,370 --> 00:41:38,826 Buffy, you told him? 677 00:41:38,913 --> 00:41:41,996 The moron overheard a conversation Greg and I were having. 678 00:41:42,083 --> 00:41:47,328 - Yeah, but what if he says something? - Who'd believe a retarded retard like him? 679 00:41:47,922 --> 00:41:49,879 Cindy, telephone. 680 00:41:51,759 --> 00:41:53,841 Thank you. 681 00:41:53,928 --> 00:41:55,259 Hello? 682 00:41:55,304 --> 00:41:57,762 - [SINISTER VOICE] Hello, Cindy. - [GASPS] 683 00:41:57,807 --> 00:41:59,764 - Guess what. - No! 684 00:41:59,809 --> 00:42:02,096 - You got the wrong guy. - No! 685 00:42:02,145 --> 00:42:03,931 - Doofy! - It's not Bobby. 686 00:42:04,022 --> 00:42:06,639 - Who is this? - [line goes dead] 687 00:42:06,733 --> 00:42:09,600 - Doofy! - Oh, my God... 688 00:42:15,950 --> 00:42:17,861 Hello? 689 00:42:19,078 --> 00:42:20,614 Hello? 690 00:42:21,289 --> 00:42:25,624 I said don't disturb me when I'm cleaning my room! 691 00:42:31,090 --> 00:42:33,627 I heard Bobby got out this morning. 692 00:42:33,718 --> 00:42:36,961 I haven't seen him around. Is he pissed? 693 00:42:37,055 --> 00:42:40,969 You mean since you branded him the Candy Man? No. His heart is broken. 694 00:42:41,017 --> 00:42:44,009 Yo, son. It's like I seen this all before. 695 00:42:44,103 --> 00:42:47,971 - They had a killer at your old high school? - No, it was in this movie Scream. 696 00:42:48,066 --> 00:42:51,900 - Same dialogue and everything. This is ill. - How did it end? 697 00:42:51,986 --> 00:42:56,321 I don't know. Some niggas started shooting up in the movie theatre, so we broke out. 698 00:42:56,407 --> 00:42:59,866 - No doubt. - OK, I say we all just stick together. 699 00:42:59,952 --> 00:43:02,068 Tonight everyone meet at my house. 700 00:43:02,163 --> 00:43:05,656 And bring some friends. But don't tell everyone. Keep it quiet. 701 00:43:05,708 --> 00:43:07,073 OK. 702 00:43:07,168 --> 00:43:12,334 Yo! Party at Cindy's house! Drunk white women for everybody! 703 00:43:12,381 --> 00:43:14,042 [CHEERING] 704 00:43:14,133 --> 00:43:18,548 Ray, if you see Bobby, tell him I love him. 705 00:43:19,180 --> 00:43:23,174 OK. If I see Bobby, I'll tell him I love him. 706 00:43:30,149 --> 00:43:33,733 - Jesus! - It's OK. It's all right. It's just me, baby. 707 00:43:33,820 --> 00:43:37,609 - You don't still think it's me, do you? - No. But somebody did try to kill me. 708 00:43:37,698 --> 00:43:42,113 - And the police said I scared him away. - I know. He called me last night. 709 00:43:42,203 --> 00:43:46,037 So it couldn't have been me. I was in jail last night, remember? 710 00:43:48,126 --> 00:43:50,117 You're the best. 711 00:43:50,211 --> 00:43:52,669 I'm sorry. Please understand. 712 00:43:52,713 --> 00:43:55,580 What, that you'd rather call me a killer than touch me? 713 00:43:55,675 --> 00:43:57,257 - That's not true. - Then what is it? 714 00:43:57,343 --> 00:44:00,131 What is it? She's gone and she's not coming back! 715 00:44:00,221 --> 00:44:01,962 It's been over a year, Cindy. 716 00:44:02,056 --> 00:44:05,048 But Ginger was such an important part of the Spice Girls. 717 00:44:05,101 --> 00:44:07,809 You gotta move on, baby. 718 00:44:07,895 --> 00:44:10,683 I'm sorry if my complicated life 719 00:44:10,731 --> 00:44:14,565 is an inconvenience to your perfect existence. 720 00:44:14,610 --> 00:44:16,021 Cindy... 721 00:44:16,404 --> 00:44:17,940 Cind... 722 00:44:18,030 --> 00:44:20,112 [SHERIFF] OK, everybody, listen up. 723 00:44:20,199 --> 00:44:25,365 Let me just say, uh, the killing of these teenagers has been tragic, 724 00:44:25,413 --> 00:44:28,826 but, uh... hey, you know, shit happens. 725 00:44:28,916 --> 00:44:31,578 [ALL] Sheriff? Sheriff? 726 00:44:31,669 --> 00:44:33,785 - Sheriff? - Yes, Miss Thunderstorm. 727 00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:36,747 - Have they found Cindy's father? - No. 728 00:44:36,841 --> 00:44:40,209 - Isn't he a suspect? - That's classified. Where did you get that? 729 00:44:40,261 --> 00:44:44,050 I'm sorry, but my sources are strictly confidential, Sheriff. 730 00:44:44,098 --> 00:44:46,260 Hey, Gail. 731 00:44:46,309 --> 00:44:48,801 Gail swallows. 732 00:44:55,776 --> 00:44:57,767 Watch this. 733 00:44:58,446 --> 00:45:00,483 Hello? 734 00:45:00,740 --> 00:45:02,697 [ALARMED] Who is this? 735 00:45:02,783 --> 00:45:05,866 What? You wanna kill me?! 736 00:45:06,412 --> 00:45:08,870 Oh, God... Hold on. 737 00:45:08,956 --> 00:45:12,244 - Cindy, it's for you. - [LAUGHTER] 738 00:45:15,213 --> 00:45:17,329 All right, knock it off, Buffy. 739 00:45:17,423 --> 00:45:20,256 As you'll all have heard, there is a killer in town 740 00:45:20,301 --> 00:45:23,965 and the police have asked us to give you the following safety tips. 741 00:45:24,013 --> 00:45:26,129 Stay in well-lit areas. 742 00:45:26,224 --> 00:45:28,807 Do not travel alone whenever possible. 743 00:45:28,851 --> 00:45:30,683 Always wipe front to back. 744 00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:33,762 And remember, never, ever believe someone 745 00:45:33,814 --> 00:45:39,810 when they tell you that shaving your pubic hair will rid you of crab infestation. 746 00:45:39,862 --> 00:45:43,776 Now, I understand this is a difficult time for you young ladies. 747 00:45:44,283 --> 00:45:49,653 So if anyone needs to come to my office to talk, I am here for you. 748 00:45:53,292 --> 00:45:57,627 - What a crock of shit. - It's not, Buffy! He's real! 749 00:45:57,672 --> 00:45:59,413 [LAUGHTER] 750 00:46:03,094 --> 00:46:05,176 [INHALES DEEPLY] 751 00:46:08,683 --> 00:46:10,390 Miss Mann? 752 00:46:12,228 --> 00:46:15,721 Come in, dear. Have a seat. Take off your bra if you'd like. 753 00:46:17,525 --> 00:46:19,516 No, thanks. 754 00:46:20,444 --> 00:46:22,481 What can I do for you, Cindy? 755 00:46:22,530 --> 00:46:24,362 I need to talk. 756 00:46:24,407 --> 00:46:29,152 See, I have this problem and I don't know who to tell. 757 00:46:30,037 --> 00:46:33,200 - Not feeling so fresh? - Huh? 758 00:46:33,291 --> 00:46:35,749 Feminine odour and itching got you down? 759 00:46:35,835 --> 00:46:38,918 Uh, no. No, not that. 760 00:46:39,005 --> 00:46:41,042 Then what is it? 761 00:46:43,092 --> 00:46:45,584 I have a terrible secret. 762 00:46:45,678 --> 00:46:48,670 Well, Cindy, we all have our little secrets. 763 00:46:51,309 --> 00:46:54,097 Sometimes we do things we're not so proud of. 764 00:46:54,770 --> 00:46:57,182 Some for money, 765 00:46:57,231 --> 00:47:00,269 others to gain the athletic edge on the competition. 766 00:47:00,359 --> 00:47:03,021 Sometimes those secrets come back to haunt us. 767 00:47:03,070 --> 00:47:04,231 Agh! 768 00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:08,569 - Do you know what I mean? - Yes, I do, Miss Mann. 769 00:47:08,617 --> 00:47:11,450 Thanks for ball... I mean all your help. 770 00:47:11,537 --> 00:47:13,744 I have to go to class. 771 00:47:14,874 --> 00:47:17,081 Any time, dear. 772 00:47:19,253 --> 00:47:23,292 - Buffy, are you coming? - I'll catch up with you guys in a sec. 773 00:47:28,429 --> 00:47:31,091 [MAN WHISPERING] Red rum. 774 00:47:31,599 --> 00:47:33,556 Hello? 775 00:47:40,566 --> 00:47:42,773 Is somebody there? 776 00:47:43,903 --> 00:47:45,894 Hello? 777 00:47:48,866 --> 00:47:50,277 Agh! 778 00:47:51,994 --> 00:47:55,237 Very funny. Who put you up to this? Cindy? 779 00:47:55,289 --> 00:47:58,372 Lose the cape - it's way too '90s horror. 780 00:48:00,294 --> 00:48:04,458 Oh, so what movie is this from? Die, Cheerleader, Die? 781 00:48:06,550 --> 00:48:11,465 Wanna play psycho killer? Can I be the helpless cheerleader? 782 00:48:13,265 --> 00:48:16,849 Oh, so is this where I'm supposed to beg for my life? 783 00:48:16,936 --> 00:48:19,394 Please, Mr Killer, don't kill me. 784 00:48:22,191 --> 00:48:23,681 [BUFFY GRUNTS] 785 00:48:23,776 --> 00:48:26,643 So is this where I'm supposed to bleed? 786 00:48:26,695 --> 00:48:29,232 Oh, look, I'm bleeding! 787 00:48:29,323 --> 00:48:31,405 Eek! Eek! 788 00:48:32,159 --> 00:48:35,117 Oh, yeah, I'm supposed to run, right? 789 00:48:35,162 --> 00:48:39,872 OK. I'm running! I'm running! Help! 790 00:48:40,376 --> 00:48:44,916 Help! Now I'm gonna fall and break my leg, leaving me helpless. 791 00:48:45,005 --> 00:48:46,996 - [CRACK] - Agh! 792 00:48:48,509 --> 00:48:52,343 There you go, Mr Scary Killer. I'm panicking now. 793 00:48:52,388 --> 00:48:56,473 Oh, God! Somebody please help me! 794 00:48:56,517 --> 00:48:58,554 Oh, God, no! 795 00:48:59,353 --> 00:49:01,344 No! 796 00:49:01,439 --> 00:49:03,931 Oh, now what? 797 00:49:04,024 --> 00:49:08,689 I guess this is the big climax. Hope you don't mind if I fake it. 798 00:49:08,737 --> 00:49:11,229 Aaaaghhhh! 799 00:49:11,574 --> 00:49:12,939 [SILENCE] 800 00:49:13,033 --> 00:49:17,027 Oh, look at me. I'm all dead. I'm a gross, scary severed head. 801 00:49:17,121 --> 00:49:18,703 Come on. Please! 802 00:49:18,747 --> 00:49:22,741 Do you know who I am? I'm Miss Teen. You're really giving me a headache. 803 00:49:22,835 --> 00:49:26,669 And you got blood on my Gucci sweater. I hope you're gonna pay for that. 804 00:49:26,714 --> 00:49:29,581 Agh! I will not be ignored by the likes... 805 00:49:30,050 --> 00:49:32,337 I'm gonna jump! 806 00:49:32,386 --> 00:49:35,048 - Phil, get back in there. - No! 807 00:49:35,097 --> 00:49:37,714 - What are you doing up there? - Be reasonable. 808 00:49:37,766 --> 00:49:43,307 I can't take this fucking job or those greasy shithead teenagers any more! 809 00:49:43,397 --> 00:49:48,938 - I'm gonna end it all! - Wait! Hold on! We're getting help for you! 810 00:49:49,028 --> 00:49:51,315 We know Bobby's not the killer. So who is? 811 00:49:51,405 --> 00:49:52,736 I don't know. 812 00:49:52,781 --> 00:49:55,944 If the killer was in your house, why didn't he kill you then? 813 00:49:56,035 --> 00:49:57,901 Because he's just messing with us. 814 00:49:57,995 --> 00:50:00,487 Don't you see? He's got us right where he wants us. 815 00:50:00,581 --> 00:50:05,792 We can't go to the police. He's just out there watching us and waiting for us. 816 00:50:05,878 --> 00:50:08,119 What are you waiting for, huh? 817 00:50:09,256 --> 00:50:11,668 What are you waiting for? 818 00:50:12,259 --> 00:50:14,091 What are you waiting for?! 819 00:50:14,970 --> 00:50:18,463 What am I waiting for? What am I waiting for?! 820 00:50:18,557 --> 00:50:21,595 - What are you waiting for? - Fuck you! 821 00:50:21,644 --> 00:50:23,806 [ONLOOKERS GASP] 822 00:50:23,896 --> 00:50:26,308 [WOMAN] Oh, my God'.! 823 00:50:26,398 --> 00:50:29,311 Ray, I still don't think this party is a good idea. 824 00:50:29,401 --> 00:50:32,894 - I won't let nothing happen to you. - I just don't feel right. 825 00:50:32,947 --> 00:50:37,407 - Why can't we just do something else? - OK, how about we go to the movies? 826 00:50:37,451 --> 00:50:40,614 Huh? You like that? See a little movie, huh? 827 00:50:41,455 --> 00:50:43,446 [HIP-HOP PLAYS ON RADIO] 828 00:50:43,541 --> 00:50:49,253 Hey! That is my song! You know they gave me a shout-out on the album, right? 829 00:50:49,296 --> 00:50:50,707 - What? - Yes! 830 00:50:50,798 --> 00:50:54,962 ♪ Everywhere I go ♪ ♪ I see the same 'ho... ♪ 831 00:50:55,010 --> 00:50:57,172 Ooh, Brenda. 832 00:50:57,263 --> 00:50:59,925 Did I tell you how sexy you look in my jersey? 833 00:50:59,974 --> 00:51:02,716 - I do, Ray? - Yes. 834 00:51:02,810 --> 00:51:05,677 I like it. Hey, get up. Go over there. Let me see it. 835 00:51:05,771 --> 00:51:07,762 [GIGGLING] 836 00:51:10,109 --> 00:51:11,645 Ooh! 837 00:51:11,694 --> 00:51:14,277 Yes, I like that. 838 00:51:14,321 --> 00:51:16,653 - You like that? You like that? - Yeah! 839 00:51:16,740 --> 00:51:19,232 Hey, put this on with it. 840 00:51:20,202 --> 00:51:24,116 - Ray, you are so freaky. - That's right. You know I'm freaky, girl. 841 00:51:24,164 --> 00:51:26,280 Go on. Pull it up. 842 00:51:26,333 --> 00:51:28,540 Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ah, ahh! 843 00:51:28,627 --> 00:51:30,584 - Aah! - Yeah. 844 00:51:30,671 --> 00:51:32,878 Here. Put this on with it. 845 00:51:33,549 --> 00:51:35,335 Go on. 846 00:51:36,468 --> 00:51:40,553 - Are you sure? - Go on, girl. Go on. Pull it on. 847 00:51:40,639 --> 00:51:43,006 - OK. - Go on. 848 00:51:45,352 --> 00:51:49,186 - I like that look. - Ooh! I'm bad. 849 00:51:49,273 --> 00:51:51,310 Yes. Here, put this on with it. 850 00:51:53,193 --> 00:51:55,480 Go on, girl. Put it on. 851 00:51:55,529 --> 00:51:58,647 Yeah. Put that shit on there. Come on. Just shove it on. 852 00:51:58,699 --> 00:52:00,690 Do it. Yeah. 853 00:52:00,743 --> 00:52:02,609 Ooh, so fucking sexy. 854 00:52:02,703 --> 00:52:07,072 Come here, girl. Bring your little sexy ass over here. Come on! Full speed. Charge! 855 00:52:07,166 --> 00:52:09,703 [GROWLS] 856 00:52:10,753 --> 00:52:14,542 Yes! Yes! Come on! Turn around! Turn around! Come on! 857 00:52:14,798 --> 00:52:17,415 Yes, Brendan! Take it, Brendan! Take it, Brendan! 858 00:52:17,509 --> 00:52:19,750 - Who? - Uh... Brenda. 859 00:52:19,845 --> 00:52:23,930 Come on, put the helmet on. No, let's role-play. Come on. You get me. 860 00:52:24,016 --> 00:52:25,677 Come on! Come on! 861 00:52:25,726 --> 00:52:29,936 I'm here at Lovers' Lookout. It's dark, it's in the middle of nowhere, 862 00:52:30,022 --> 00:52:33,310 and it's where hormone-driven teens love to come and fool around. 863 00:52:33,400 --> 00:52:36,563 So very likely we're about to see someone get killed. 864 00:52:36,654 --> 00:52:40,443 OK, sure enough, there's a girl in that car, blouse unbuttoned, all alone. 865 00:52:40,532 --> 00:52:43,240 Let's see if she'll have a word with us. 866 00:52:43,327 --> 00:52:47,241 Hi. Gail Hailstorm, author of the new book You're Next. 867 00:52:47,289 --> 00:52:48,950 Oh, yeah. 868 00:52:49,041 --> 00:52:51,578 - Can you tell us your name? - My name's Heather. 869 00:52:51,752 --> 00:52:54,835 Can you tell us what you're doing out here all alone? 870 00:52:54,922 --> 00:52:58,586 Well, yeah, sure. My boyfriend and I were just, like, making out, 871 00:52:58,634 --> 00:53:01,877 then we heard a noise so he went to go check it, but... 872 00:53:01,929 --> 00:53:04,671 - Well, that was, like, ten minutes ago. - Yeah, yeah... 873 00:53:04,765 --> 00:53:08,303 Has it crossed your little mind that your boyfriend was probably murdered 874 00:53:08,394 --> 00:53:11,432 and you're about to be slaughtered next? 875 00:53:11,522 --> 00:53:14,935 - Really? No way! - Way. 876 00:53:14,983 --> 00:53:17,771 - Heather, good luck. - Thanks, Gail. You're the best. 877 00:53:17,861 --> 00:53:18,861 [SCREAMING] 878 00:53:18,946 --> 00:53:21,483 Just as I thought! The murder is happening as we speak! 879 00:53:21,573 --> 00:53:24,565 I'll try and break into the bloodshed. Are you getting this? 880 00:53:24,618 --> 00:53:28,202 Excuse me. Heather, can you tell us what you're feeling, honey? 881 00:53:28,288 --> 00:53:31,826 Lots of pain. Gail, please help me! Gail, please! 882 00:53:31,917 --> 00:53:36,127 I'd like to help you out, kid, but it's sweeps. Sir, sir, can I get a word with you? 883 00:53:36,171 --> 00:53:39,209 You got a nerve coming here! I'm just trying to do my job! 884 00:53:39,299 --> 00:53:42,132 - Get the camera off me! - No, Kenny, keep rolling! 885 00:53:42,177 --> 00:53:46,216 I'm gonna slice your head off and shove it up his ass. Get that camera off me! 886 00:53:46,306 --> 00:53:50,300 Oh, my God, Kenny! Kenny, move your fat ass! 887 00:53:51,061 --> 00:53:53,678 Kenny! Oh, God, he's right behind you! 888 00:53:53,772 --> 00:53:56,139 [KENNY] This man is chasing Miss Gail! 889 00:53:56,191 --> 00:53:58,307 - [KENNY GRUNTS] - [THUD] 890 00:54:02,740 --> 00:54:05,232 I am so scared right now. 891 00:54:06,577 --> 00:54:08,818 I just want to say... 892 00:54:09,496 --> 00:54:12,488 to the family of my cameraman, Kenny... 893 00:54:12,541 --> 00:54:14,657 I am so sorry. 894 00:54:15,335 --> 00:54:17,952 This was my interview, 895 00:54:18,672 --> 00:54:20,663 my story. 896 00:54:21,341 --> 00:54:23,628 It's all my fault. 897 00:54:28,515 --> 00:54:30,677 - You want some popcorn? - Uh-uh. 898 00:54:30,768 --> 00:54:33,510 I brought me a little snack of my own. 899 00:54:33,562 --> 00:54:36,179 [PAPER RUSTLING] 900 00:54:36,273 --> 00:54:38,765 - You want some chicken? - Nah. 901 00:54:42,196 --> 00:54:43,311 Mm-hm. 902 00:54:43,363 --> 00:54:47,277 For all y'all talkers up in here, it's time to keep it down right now. 903 00:54:47,367 --> 00:54:49,074 Shh. 904 00:54:49,161 --> 00:54:51,528 Shh back at you. Shh! 905 00:54:53,957 --> 00:54:57,370 Why they acting already? It ain't nothing but the previews. 906 00:55:01,006 --> 00:55:04,089 The largest ship the world had ever known. 907 00:55:04,176 --> 00:55:09,012 Its 400 passengers and crew on a maiden voyage to a brave new world. 908 00:55:09,056 --> 00:55:12,048 A journey that would change their lives forever. 909 00:55:12,142 --> 00:55:14,850 Whoo! 910 00:55:16,897 --> 00:55:18,763 I'm the king of the world! 911 00:55:19,650 --> 00:55:21,891 Whoo-hoo! 912 00:55:21,985 --> 00:55:23,726 Whoo! 913 00:55:23,821 --> 00:55:24,982 Aaargh! 914 00:55:25,072 --> 00:55:27,860 - Amistad II. - Get your ass back down there, boy! 915 00:55:27,908 --> 00:55:31,071 - I'm gonna go to the bathroom. - The movie about to come on. 916 00:55:31,161 --> 00:55:33,698 I gotta go to the bathroom. Here. Take your hot sauce. 917 00:55:33,747 --> 00:55:36,739 [BRENDA] Hurry up, man. Don't be long. 918 00:55:37,251 --> 00:55:40,585 [SCREECHING] Back up! Let him through! 919 00:55:40,671 --> 00:55:43,504 You can move back some. You don't own the theatre. 920 00:55:46,677 --> 00:55:48,839 [CHATTERING] 921 00:55:49,471 --> 00:55:51,838 - [BELL RINGS] - [ANNOUNCER] And they're off! 922 00:55:51,932 --> 00:55:54,299 No.3 in the lead. No.2 close behind. 923 00:55:54,393 --> 00:55:57,101 And No.3 is the winner! 924 00:55:58,605 --> 00:56:00,516 - [CHEERING] - Yeah, partner! 925 00:56:00,607 --> 00:56:03,941 No.2 has placed, and No.4 to show. 926 00:56:03,986 --> 00:56:06,944 Next week's Triple Crown starts at 2:30. 927 00:56:06,989 --> 00:56:09,276 [TRICKLING] 928 00:56:10,033 --> 00:56:13,151 [HIGH-PITCHED COOING] 929 00:56:15,956 --> 00:56:18,448 [COOING CONTINUES] 930 00:56:31,305 --> 00:56:33,467 [GIGGLES] 931 00:56:36,476 --> 00:56:38,513 Hey, who was that? 932 00:56:39,062 --> 00:56:41,975 Go ahead, do it again. Do it again. 933 00:56:44,026 --> 00:56:46,017 [SQUELCH] 934 00:56:52,993 --> 00:56:54,984 [ACTRESS] Anon. 935 00:56:57,456 --> 00:56:59,743 [BRENDA] Nn. Nn-nn. Nn-nnn! 936 00:57:00,918 --> 00:57:03,205 Don't go in there! 937 00:57:04,671 --> 00:57:05,911 [YELLS] 938 00:57:06,006 --> 00:57:07,087 [SCREAMS] 939 00:57:07,174 --> 00:57:09,085 [HOOTS WITH LAUGHTER] 940 00:57:09,176 --> 00:57:13,215 Lord, I'm gonna have a heart attack! Damn, this is some scary shit! 941 00:57:13,305 --> 00:57:16,172 Oh, I am scared! Oh! 942 00:57:16,266 --> 00:57:18,803 Excuse me! 943 00:57:18,852 --> 00:57:21,844 I think I paid my money like everybody else up in here. 944 00:57:21,897 --> 00:57:25,015 - Out of her favour... - That ain't no man. 945 00:57:25,108 --> 00:57:27,850 - You can see her real hair right there! - Do you mind? 946 00:57:27,903 --> 00:57:30,861 I know you better get outta my face! 947 00:57:31,490 --> 00:57:34,027 Outta my face! Outta my face! 948 00:57:34,117 --> 00:57:36,734 This is all me up in here. You handle that. 949 00:57:36,828 --> 00:57:39,320 - [MAN] Will you shut the fuck up?! - [WOMAN] Yeah! 950 00:57:39,373 --> 00:57:40,863 Mm-mm. 951 00:57:40,958 --> 00:57:42,665 This movie is good. 952 00:57:42,709 --> 00:57:47,294 Hey, baby. You came back just in time. 953 00:57:47,381 --> 00:57:49,998 She's about to get it on with Shakespeare. 954 00:57:50,050 --> 00:57:53,042 - He found out she's a girl. - Shut up. 955 00:57:53,136 --> 00:57:56,549 Yeah, I got you. I got you on camera. 956 00:57:56,640 --> 00:57:58,972 You on Candid Camera now. 957 00:57:59,685 --> 00:58:01,596 You ain't know that. 958 00:58:01,687 --> 00:58:04,554 - [CELLPHONE RINGS] - [AUDIENCE GROANS] 959 00:58:04,648 --> 00:58:05,934 Hello? 960 00:58:06,024 --> 00:58:10,393 Hey, girl. Uh-uh. I'm in a movie. Shakespeare in Love. 961 00:58:10,487 --> 00:58:12,774 Uh-uh. Ooh! 962 00:58:12,864 --> 00:58:16,698 - You in! - For Christ's sake, just shut your trap! 963 00:58:16,743 --> 00:58:19,110 - Shut up! - Hold on. 964 00:58:19,204 --> 00:58:22,117 I don't know why y'all is actin' like this. 965 00:58:22,207 --> 00:58:25,416 My girlfriend said they don't even stay together in the end. 966 00:58:25,460 --> 00:58:27,576 Give me that. 967 00:58:28,338 --> 00:58:30,045 Right on. 968 00:58:31,258 --> 00:58:33,044 Will you sit down?! 969 00:58:33,093 --> 00:58:34,254 [GROANS] 970 00:58:34,344 --> 00:58:36,301 Shut up! 971 00:58:36,388 --> 00:58:38,425 Your ass is grass. 972 00:58:42,269 --> 00:58:44,636 - This is for Thelma! - And Louise! 973 00:58:44,730 --> 00:58:47,392 This is for talking through The Fugitive! 974 00:58:47,441 --> 00:58:50,399 - You ruined Schindler's List! - All Jackie Chan movies! 975 00:58:50,444 --> 00:58:54,733 - Boogie Nights. - And Big Momma's House! 976 00:58:54,781 --> 00:58:57,148 [AUDIENCE JEERING] 977 00:58:58,618 --> 00:59:03,738 Aaaghh! 978 00:59:07,335 --> 00:59:09,451 [APPLAUSE] 979 00:59:11,298 --> 00:59:14,461 [SHAKESPEARE IN LOVE CONTINUES] 980 00:59:14,634 --> 00:59:16,625 ♪ [HEAVY ROCK] ♪ 981 00:59:17,929 --> 00:59:21,547 Um, you guys, there's a few too many people. 982 00:59:21,641 --> 00:59:24,884 Oh, honey, please don't throw up. No, hey, you guys, stop. 983 00:59:24,978 --> 00:59:27,185 Hey! Hey, please! That's my dad's! 984 00:59:27,272 --> 00:59:30,856 - No, don't touch... Agh! No! - Do you have more beer? 985 00:59:30,942 --> 00:59:33,058 Um, yeah. Uh, check in the garage. 986 00:59:33,153 --> 00:59:35,520 - No, no, no, no! No! - [CRASHING] 987 00:59:54,883 --> 00:59:56,999 [CLATTER] 988 00:59:57,094 --> 01:00:00,337 Oh! Kitty, you scared me. 989 01:00:01,431 --> 01:00:02,546 - [CLANGING] - Oh! 990 01:00:02,641 --> 01:00:04,382 [WHINNYING] 991 01:00:04,476 --> 01:00:08,765 Horsey! Oh, you scared me too. 992 01:00:12,400 --> 01:00:14,357 Hello? 993 01:00:14,402 --> 01:00:15,608 Who's there? 994 01:00:16,446 --> 01:00:18,278 [GASPS] 995 01:00:18,365 --> 01:00:21,198 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Please don't. 996 01:00:21,243 --> 01:00:23,905 Please! I'm just a day player. 997 01:00:36,925 --> 01:00:38,836 [SCREAMS] 998 01:00:39,803 --> 01:00:41,794 Oh, my God! 999 01:00:43,890 --> 01:00:45,881 [SQUEALS] 1000 01:00:52,315 --> 01:00:53,646 [SCREAMS] 1001 01:01:08,582 --> 01:01:12,792 [GROUP] Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! 1002 01:01:14,921 --> 01:01:17,208 - [SCREAMS] - [HOWLING] 1003 01:01:17,257 --> 01:01:19,589 Yeah! Yeah! 1004 01:01:21,428 --> 01:01:23,590 Oh, Bobby! Bobby. 1005 01:01:23,680 --> 01:01:25,762 I was worried about you. 1006 01:01:25,807 --> 01:01:29,175 I thought the killer got to you before I could. 1007 01:01:29,269 --> 01:01:31,101 Could what? 1008 01:01:31,188 --> 01:01:35,307 I wanna go upstairs. There's something I wanna show you. 1009 01:01:36,276 --> 01:01:38,768 - Yeah, yeah. - [CHUCKLES] Oh, yeah. 1010 01:01:38,862 --> 01:01:41,650 - Hey. cam on. - [ALL WHOOP] 1011 01:01:46,953 --> 01:01:49,991 - So... - So... [GIGGLES NERVOUSLY] 1012 01:01:50,081 --> 01:01:52,664 Here we are... again. 1013 01:01:52,751 --> 01:01:54,412 Yeah. 1014 01:01:56,296 --> 01:01:59,414 And, you know, if you're not ready... 1015 01:02:00,300 --> 01:02:02,291 I'll understand. 1016 01:02:03,178 --> 01:02:05,010 Bobby. 1017 01:02:05,096 --> 01:02:07,087 I am ready. 1018 01:02:08,266 --> 01:02:10,428 - You are? - Yeah. 1019 01:02:12,479 --> 01:02:15,938 I can't keep fighting these urges. 1020 01:02:16,816 --> 01:02:19,979 I have to just give in to them 1021 01:02:20,028 --> 01:02:21,939 and let them flow. 1022 01:02:21,988 --> 01:02:24,229 Right. 1023 01:02:24,324 --> 01:02:25,940 - Bobby? - Huh? 1024 01:02:25,992 --> 01:02:29,075 I have been so selfish. 1025 01:02:30,997 --> 01:02:33,534 This is like a scene from a movie or something. 1026 01:02:33,625 --> 01:02:36,287 Only it isn't a movie, Bobby. 1027 01:02:36,336 --> 01:02:38,247 This is real life. 1028 01:02:39,464 --> 01:02:41,831 It's all a movie, baby. 1029 01:02:41,925 --> 01:02:45,793 There's the sound guy, the script supervisor. How you doing, baby? 1030 01:02:45,845 --> 01:02:47,882 - Bobby! - What? 1031 01:02:48,682 --> 01:02:51,344 What I mean... 1032 01:02:51,393 --> 01:02:56,263 is that in real life you have to enjoy each moment. 1033 01:02:56,356 --> 01:02:58,267 Mm-hm. 1034 01:03:19,921 --> 01:03:22,709 Mmm! Oh! 1035 01:03:22,757 --> 01:03:24,748 Ow! Ow! 1036 01:03:24,843 --> 01:03:29,007 - [MUMBLES] Bobby. Bobby'. - [MURMURS INDISTINCTLY] 1037 01:03:30,849 --> 01:03:32,840 Can I tell you a secret? 1038 01:03:33,601 --> 01:03:35,592 Sure, man. 1039 01:03:36,730 --> 01:03:38,721 I see dead people. 1040 01:03:40,692 --> 01:03:43,559 Man, this shit is awesome! 1041 01:03:43,611 --> 01:03:46,148 Yo, son, we gotta roll some more of that shit! 1042 01:03:46,239 --> 01:03:47,900 Ah, Shit! 1043 01:03:47,949 --> 01:03:50,737 We don't have any more papers, man. 1044 01:03:50,827 --> 01:03:52,818 Don't have any more papers. 1045 01:03:53,246 --> 01:03:56,864 Oh, man! What can we use to make a bong? 1046 01:03:56,916 --> 01:03:58,907 [LIQUID FIZZING] 1047 01:04:01,004 --> 01:04:03,917 Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! 1048 01:04:03,965 --> 01:04:05,831 Yeah! 1049 01:04:11,681 --> 01:04:15,925 Oh, shit, son! 1050 01:04:16,019 --> 01:04:20,434 Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke! To... 1051 01:04:21,441 --> 01:04:25,560 - This is some good shit! - [SHOUTING WHOOPING] 1052 01:04:41,211 --> 01:04:43,543 [BOTH STRAINING] 1053 01:04:47,884 --> 01:04:50,876 Bobby! I've never done this before. 1054 01:04:52,263 --> 01:04:55,722 It's OK. It's OK. It's just like... 1055 01:04:55,809 --> 01:04:59,018 - It's like sucking on a Tootsie Roll Pop. - A Tootsie Pop? 1056 01:04:59,104 --> 01:05:01,391 Yeah, a cherry-flavour one. 1057 01:05:01,481 --> 01:05:04,269 - Oh. - With the fudge in the middle? 1058 01:05:04,401 --> 01:05:08,019 - [MAKES SUCKING SOUND] - OK! 1059 01:05:08,530 --> 01:05:10,396 ♪ Show me how ♪ 1060 01:05:10,490 --> 01:05:12,652 ♪ How it feels when we're together... ♪ 1061 01:05:12,700 --> 01:05:14,441 Just like that. 1062 01:05:14,494 --> 01:05:17,031 Just like that, baby. 1063 01:05:18,832 --> 01:05:20,368 - [CRUNCH] - Argh! 1064 01:05:20,458 --> 01:05:22,950 Oh! Jesus! 1065 01:05:24,671 --> 01:05:27,834 I never could wait to get to the chewy middle. 1066 01:05:27,882 --> 01:05:29,873 You know what? Let me. 1067 01:05:31,010 --> 01:05:32,500 God damn! 1068 01:05:32,554 --> 01:05:36,969 ♪ I'm on a rocket ship to a mother ship ♪ 1069 01:05:37,016 --> 01:05:41,385 ♪ I'm flying solo, ♪ ♪ but don't know if I can stop ♪ 1070 01:05:41,479 --> 01:05:45,848 ♪ Don't ask me why, ♪ ♪ don't make me He ♪ 1071 01:05:45,942 --> 01:05:48,149 ♪ Just get back, just sit back ♪ 1072 01:05:48,194 --> 01:05:50,606 ♪ Enjoy the ride ♪ 1073 01:05:53,491 --> 01:05:55,482 ♪ Cos I'm a spaceman ♪ 1074 01:05:55,994 --> 01:05:58,031 [BATS SQUEAKING] 1075 01:05:58,121 --> 01:06:01,239 Yeah! Guess it's been a while. [GIGGLES] 1076 01:06:02,709 --> 01:06:04,996 ♪ So stay with me... ♪ 1077 01:06:06,880 --> 01:06:09,042 Oh! Oops! 1078 01:06:09,966 --> 01:06:12,128 It's very '70s of you. 1079 01:06:13,678 --> 01:06:16,170 ♪ Tomorrow's just another day ♪ 1080 01:06:27,734 --> 01:06:29,816 Oh, yeah. 1081 01:06:29,903 --> 01:06:31,564 Oh, Bobby! 1082 01:06:31,988 --> 01:06:34,525 [GAGGING] 1083 01:06:34,574 --> 01:06:37,532 Come here, Bobby. I want it now! 1084 01:06:38,119 --> 01:06:42,738 - Oh, man, am I fucking stoned! - Yeah, me too. 1085 01:06:42,790 --> 01:06:45,077 Hey-Hey, you guys hear that? 1086 01:06:45,126 --> 01:06:49,336 [MIMICS ELECTRONIC SOUND THAT HERALDS KILLER'S APPEARANCE] 1087 01:06:49,422 --> 01:06:51,413 - [LAUGHS] - Oh! 1088 01:06:51,466 --> 01:06:53,457 [ALL LAUGH] 1089 01:06:57,263 --> 01:06:59,254 Shh! Shh! 1090 01:07:00,683 --> 01:07:02,515 - [RINGING TONE] - [GIRL] Hello? 1091 01:07:02,602 --> 01:07:06,436 Hello. What's your favourite scary movie? 1092 01:07:06,523 --> 01:07:08,730 [ALL BURST INTO LAUGHTER] 1093 01:07:11,027 --> 01:07:13,018 Let me talk to her. Shh! 1094 01:07:14,781 --> 01:07:16,943 I'm gonna gut you like a pig! 1095 01:07:17,033 --> 01:07:19,320 [ALL LAUGH] 1096 01:07:24,123 --> 01:07:27,832 Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! 1097 01:07:27,919 --> 01:07:29,785 What's my name, Bobby? 1098 01:07:29,837 --> 01:07:31,248 What? 1099 01:07:31,297 --> 01:07:34,961 - What's my name, bitch? - Ow! God! It's Cindy! 1100 01:07:35,009 --> 01:07:38,092 Whose is it, Bobby? Whose is it, Bobby? 1101 01:07:38,137 --> 01:07:40,174 It's yours. 1102 01:07:40,265 --> 01:07:43,553 [GROWLS MANIACALLY] 1103 01:07:44,310 --> 01:07:46,847 - [ROARS] - Oh, my God! 1104 01:07:46,938 --> 01:07:49,179 [RUMBLING] 1105 01:07:50,441 --> 01:07:52,899 Oh, shit! 1106 01:07:58,575 --> 01:08:00,803 ♪ [raps] Don't even contest ♪ ♪ cos I'll make you undress ♪ 1107 01:08:00,827 --> 01:08:03,615 ♪ Like porn dancers ♪ ♪ waiting at the front door for an answer ♪ 1108 01:08:03,663 --> 01:08:06,746 ♪ Hey, yo, I'm sick of artificial MCs ♪ ♪ like silicone titties ♪ 1109 01:08:06,833 --> 01:08:08,164 Hey, yo, check it, yo. 1110 01:08:08,209 --> 01:08:11,076 ♪ Fuck a cheap bong, ♪ ♪ I wanna smoke Cheech and Chong ♪ 1111 01:08:11,170 --> 01:08:14,959 ♪ If I wanna fuck long, I let my ding-a-long ♪ ♪ hit the bong, and then it's on ♪ 1112 01:08:15,008 --> 01:08:19,468 ♪ Always pass the dutchie to the left ♪ ♪ because the right way is wrong [cackles] ♪ 1113 01:08:19,512 --> 01:08:23,380 - Whoo-hoo! - I got one. I got one. Here it goes. Ready? 1114 01:08:23,474 --> 01:08:26,216 ♪ I'm gonna slash and gash, ♪ ♪ out another hole in your ass ♪ 1115 01:08:26,311 --> 01:08:28,831 ♪ I spill blood on the walls, ♪ ♪ then play tennis with your balls ♪ 1116 01:08:28,855 --> 01:08:30,721 ♪ If the phone rings, ♪ ♪ don't answer that call ♪ 1117 01:08:30,815 --> 01:08:32,793 ♪ Gonna slit your throat, ♪ ♪ fuck you like a goat ♪ 1118 01:08:32,817 --> 01:08:34,878 ♪ Peel your foreskin off ♪ ♪ and make a winter coat ♪ 1119 01:08:34,902 --> 01:08:36,563 Peace! 1120 01:08:38,698 --> 01:08:40,359 Yo! 1121 01:08:41,618 --> 01:08:45,828 That was the illest rhyme I ever seen, son! 1122 01:08:47,624 --> 01:08:49,865 Bobby? 1123 01:08:49,917 --> 01:08:54,036 - Where were you tonight? - What? 1124 01:08:54,088 --> 01:08:57,581 I was just curious. What took you so long to get here? 1125 01:08:57,675 --> 01:08:59,757 Why are you so curious? 1126 01:09:01,012 --> 01:09:03,003 I don't know. 1127 01:09:03,056 --> 01:09:08,347 I thought it would fit the '90s horror cliché if you turned out to be the killer. 1128 01:09:08,394 --> 01:09:11,227 Oh, so, what? You think I killed Buffy and Greg? 1129 01:09:12,940 --> 01:09:15,272 Buffy and Greg are dead? 1130 01:09:16,402 --> 01:09:18,234 - I thought you knew that. - Oh, God! 1131 01:09:18,279 --> 01:09:20,941 Bobby, turn around! It's the killer! 1132 01:09:21,032 --> 01:09:22,488 Agh! 1133 01:09:28,581 --> 01:09:30,242 [CINDY SHRIEKS] 1134 01:09:35,421 --> 01:09:37,412 - Cindy! - [GASPS] 1135 01:09:37,507 --> 01:09:41,091 - Oh, my God! Bobby! Bobby! - Cindy. Help me. 1136 01:09:42,387 --> 01:09:46,927 - Bobby, it's OK. - Give me the gun. Give me the gun... 1137 01:09:46,974 --> 01:09:48,965 It's gonna be OK, Bobby. 1138 01:09:50,561 --> 01:09:53,553 Yo, wait for me. There's a killer in the house! 1139 01:09:53,606 --> 01:09:57,270 There's ass, blood and guts everywhere. Someone done gone crazy, son! 1140 01:09:57,318 --> 01:09:59,400 [EVIL CHUCKLE] 1141 01:09:59,445 --> 01:10:01,482 We all go a little crazy sometimes. 1142 01:10:01,572 --> 01:10:03,062 Bobby, no! 1143 01:10:03,616 --> 01:10:06,449 Oh, shit, son! 1144 01:10:06,494 --> 01:10:09,452 Oh! Oh, my God! 1145 01:10:09,497 --> 01:10:11,033 [GROANS] 1146 01:10:11,124 --> 01:10:13,957 Cindy, he shot me in the lungs. 1147 01:10:14,001 --> 01:10:15,742 [INHALES] 1148 01:10:15,795 --> 01:10:17,786 You wanna hit this shit? 1149 01:10:21,968 --> 01:10:23,834 Ketchup. 1150 01:10:23,928 --> 01:10:26,545 Just like my mom puts on her spaghetti, baby. 1151 01:10:28,516 --> 01:10:32,726 Oh, my God! Ray, you've gotta help me! Bobby's gone crazy! 1152 01:10:32,812 --> 01:10:35,179 - [girl's voice] Surprise! - [FEEDBACK] 1153 01:10:35,273 --> 01:10:38,140 - [KILLER'S VOICE] Surprise, Cindy. - [GASPS] 1154 01:10:50,079 --> 01:10:52,195 Why are you doing this, Bobby? 1155 01:10:52,290 --> 01:10:54,281 Why? Why?! 1156 01:10:55,209 --> 01:10:58,452 You hear that, Ray? I think she wants a motive. 1157 01:10:58,504 --> 01:11:01,667 - Did Scream have a plot? - No! 1158 01:11:01,716 --> 01:11:06,176 Did I Know What You Did Last Summer make any sense? Don't think so! 1159 01:11:06,220 --> 01:11:08,712 And the sequel? What was with that fat Jamaican? 1160 01:11:08,806 --> 01:11:12,800 - I wanna kill that mother fucker. - It was bad casting, Bobby. 1161 01:11:12,852 --> 01:11:15,560 How about this for a motive? Lack of sex! 1162 01:11:15,646 --> 01:11:18,934 It can cause serious deviant behaviour. 1163 01:11:19,025 --> 01:11:23,610 - I thought you loved me. - Oh, I did, baby. I did. 1164 01:11:23,696 --> 01:11:26,688 But abstinence makes you discover new things about yourself. 1165 01:11:26,741 --> 01:11:29,324 That's right, Cindy. I'm gay. 1166 01:11:29,869 --> 01:11:33,533 And in case you haven't noticed, so is Ray. 1167 01:11:33,623 --> 01:11:36,035 What? I ain't gay. 1168 01:11:36,125 --> 01:11:40,460 - What? You took me to that club. - So? They play good music. 1169 01:11:40,546 --> 01:11:45,211 - What about our trip to San Francisco? - I wanted to go shopping. 1170 01:11:45,301 --> 01:11:49,169 - But you made love to me. - No. First of all, you sucked my... 1171 01:11:49,222 --> 01:11:53,637 Whatever, Ray! I don't wanna talk about this now. The point is, I'm a new man. 1172 01:11:53,726 --> 01:11:56,343 I'm ready to leave this behind and start a new life. 1173 01:11:56,395 --> 01:11:59,933 - So you killed all your friends? - Oh, no. 1174 01:12:00,024 --> 01:12:01,560 Just you. 1175 01:12:01,651 --> 01:12:04,359 And maybe Shorty, but that wasn't planned. 1176 01:12:04,403 --> 01:12:06,565 But here's the genius part. 1177 01:12:06,614 --> 01:12:10,232 We're copycatting a serial killer that already exists. 1178 01:12:10,326 --> 01:12:14,194 - It's the perfect crime, Cindy. - But wait! There's more! 1179 01:12:14,580 --> 01:12:19,416 Hang on to your seat, baby, cos this one's a Screamer! 1180 01:12:19,460 --> 01:12:22,919 - I'll be back. - Uh-oh. 1181 01:12:23,005 --> 01:12:25,463 Move your big ass. Come on. 1182 01:12:25,550 --> 01:12:27,837 - Dad. - [GRUNTS] 1183 01:12:27,927 --> 01:12:30,419 What are you gonna do, frame him? 1184 01:12:30,471 --> 01:12:34,965 Nah. We're just having a little bit of fun with old daddio. 1185 01:12:35,059 --> 01:12:37,892 The police are gonna find you and Daddy both dead, 1186 01:12:37,937 --> 01:12:41,396 and me and Ray are the only survivors of a maniac's revenge. 1187 01:12:41,440 --> 01:12:42,440 - Ready? - Ready? 1188 01:12:42,525 --> 01:12:45,108 - I'm ready to do this shit. - Let's do this shit. 1189 01:12:45,152 --> 01:12:49,362 - Come on. Come on. All right. - All right. Give it to me. 1190 01:12:49,448 --> 01:12:51,405 No! Wait, wait, wait. 1191 01:12:52,785 --> 01:12:55,698 - All right, ready? Let's do this. - Wait, wait. Ready. 1192 01:12:55,788 --> 01:12:57,870 - Come on. Come on. - Ready. 1193 01:12:57,957 --> 01:13:00,699 - Give it to me! - No! Wait, wait, wait, wait! 1194 01:13:00,793 --> 01:13:03,751 - Remember what we said? - How many times we gonna go over this? 1195 01:13:03,796 --> 01:13:07,084 I know. OK. Stop. Just... Trust me, OK? 1196 01:13:07,133 --> 01:13:09,500 - I got this shit. Ready? - Come on. 1197 01:13:09,594 --> 01:13:12,382 - Wait, wait! - I'm about to out your throat, boy! 1198 01:13:12,471 --> 01:13:14,758 Stop acting like a little girl. Come on! 1199 01:13:14,807 --> 01:13:17,549 - You're right. - Come on! You ready? 1200 01:13:17,643 --> 01:13:21,136 No! You guys are psychos! 1201 01:13:21,230 --> 01:13:23,597 You've seen one too many TV shows! 1202 01:13:23,649 --> 01:13:27,984 No! Watching television shows doesn't create psycho killers. 1203 01:13:28,321 --> 01:13:30,403 Cancelling TV shows does! 1204 01:13:30,489 --> 01:13:33,026 The Wayans Bros was a good show, man! 1205 01:13:33,117 --> 01:13:37,452 It was a good-ass show, and we didn't even get a final episode! 1206 01:13:37,496 --> 01:13:40,739 Take it easy. I'm feeling a little woozy here. 1207 01:13:41,208 --> 01:13:43,666 It's my turn. Give me the knife. 1208 01:13:43,711 --> 01:13:46,999 Fuck outta here. Ain't nobody stabbing me. 1209 01:13:48,841 --> 01:13:50,047 Oh! 1210 01:13:52,261 --> 01:13:55,219 - [CINDY SCREAMS] - [BOTH GROAN] 1211 01:13:55,306 --> 01:13:57,013 - Surprise, Cindy. - Agh! 1212 01:14:04,649 --> 01:14:06,265 Yah! 1213 01:14:07,234 --> 01:14:09,396 [GROWLING] 1214 01:14:10,780 --> 01:14:12,817 Agh! 1215 01:14:15,993 --> 01:14:17,654 Ohm 1216 01:14:33,219 --> 01:14:34,709 [GROANS] 1217 01:14:39,141 --> 01:14:41,348 [SHRIEKS] 1218 01:14:43,562 --> 01:14:45,223 Yah! 1219 01:14:48,317 --> 01:14:50,649 [GROANS] 1220 01:14:50,736 --> 01:14:53,728 All right, all right, all right. Hold on a second. 1221 01:14:53,823 --> 01:14:56,611 Just give me a moment. Agh. One... 1222 01:14:58,411 --> 01:15:01,699 [GRUNTS AND SIGHS] 1223 01:15:01,747 --> 01:15:04,079 - [BONES CRACKING] - Oh, yeah. That's it. 1224 01:15:04,166 --> 01:15:06,157 Agh. OK. 1225 01:15:07,545 --> 01:15:09,331 Yah! 1226 01:15:13,009 --> 01:15:15,000 ♪ [IRISH JIG] ♪ 1227 01:15:40,619 --> 01:15:43,281 - [CRIES OUT] - Dad! 1228 01:15:43,330 --> 01:15:45,412 - [MUMBLES] - Are you OK'? 1229 01:15:45,458 --> 01:15:48,371 I thought I told you not to have a party unless I was here. 1230 01:15:48,461 --> 01:15:50,919 But, Dad, you were here. You were in the closet. 1231 01:15:50,963 --> 01:15:54,797 Oh, yeah, that's right. Did you get some girlfriends' numbers for me? 1232 01:15:54,842 --> 01:15:58,130 - Dad, they're dead. - Ah, you know, I can't get a break. 1233 01:15:58,179 --> 01:16:00,295 - [SIREN] - What's that? Is that the cops? 1234 01:16:00,347 --> 01:16:02,964 OK, OK, listen, honey. Help me up now. 1235 01:16:03,059 --> 01:16:06,017 Uh, if the cops come, tell 'em I'm a plumber, OK? 1236 01:16:06,103 --> 01:16:10,222 You had a leaky faucet and they sent me over. We don't even know each other. 1237 01:16:15,988 --> 01:16:19,356 - No! No! - [TYRES SCREECHING] 1238 01:16:19,450 --> 01:16:22,317 [WHISPERS] Dad, get your arms down. 1239 01:16:23,913 --> 01:16:26,575 - What's going on? - [MAN] Sheriff, it's a bloodbath. 1240 01:16:26,665 --> 01:16:28,997 - He was right here! I swear it! - Who was? 1241 01:16:29,043 --> 01:16:32,752 The killer! The guy that murdered all my friends! 1242 01:16:32,838 --> 01:16:36,456 And the sick bastard planted drugs all in the house there. 1243 01:16:36,509 --> 01:16:39,501 - All over the place. - Dad. Stop it. 1244 01:16:39,595 --> 01:16:42,462 Cindy, I'm gonna have to take you down to the station. 1245 01:16:42,515 --> 01:16:45,007 I'm cool, though, right? I'm OK? 1246 01:16:45,101 --> 01:16:47,889 - Let's go, Cindy. - Cindy... 1247 01:16:47,978 --> 01:16:50,811 Call me. Call me. 1248 01:16:50,856 --> 01:16:52,392 Daddy'|| get you out, honey. 1249 01:16:54,568 --> 01:16:56,229 OK. 1250 01:16:57,404 --> 01:16:59,566 Let's go over this again. 1251 01:17:11,252 --> 01:17:14,711 - You say it was an accident. - Yes. He was on the road. 1252 01:17:14,797 --> 01:17:18,290 - And he came back to get revenge? - It has to be him, Sheriff. 1253 01:17:18,384 --> 01:17:19,545 [CRASH] 1254 01:17:25,141 --> 01:17:28,930 - Here. They wanted me to give this to you. - That'll be all, Doofy. 1255 01:17:29,019 --> 01:17:32,057 - OK. I'm gonna go, then. - All right. 1256 01:17:32,148 --> 01:17:34,185 All right. 1257 01:17:34,233 --> 01:17:35,974 Night, Cind. 1258 01:17:39,071 --> 01:17:41,563 Sorry, Cindy. It wasn't the man you guys killed. 1259 01:17:41,615 --> 01:17:45,108 He was David Keegan. Some fishermen found his body a few weeks later. 1260 01:17:45,202 --> 01:17:48,661 - He's buried in Lakewood Cemetery. - That's impossible. 1261 01:17:50,624 --> 01:17:54,458 - Then I don't know who it could be. - He's gotta be connected with the victims. 1262 01:17:54,545 --> 01:18:00,086 Someone who knew about the accident, who'd move round without being noticed. 1263 01:18:01,844 --> 01:18:03,926 Oh, my God. 1264 01:18:05,097 --> 01:18:09,011 She used to baby-sit my brother Doofy. He had the biggest crush on her. 1265 01:18:09,101 --> 01:18:11,183 Agh! It's me, Cind. 1266 01:18:12,021 --> 01:18:13,682 Night, Cind. 1267 01:18:17,526 --> 01:18:19,688 - Doofy! - Shithead? 1268 01:18:22,740 --> 01:18:24,071 - Have you seen Doofy? - No. 1269 01:18:24,116 --> 01:18:25,777 - You seen Doofy? - No, Sheriff. 1270 01:18:25,868 --> 01:18:29,532 - Has anybody seen Doofy? - Yeah. He just went out the back, Sheriff. 1271 01:18:29,622 --> 01:18:31,283 [SHERIFF] Doom! 1272 01:18:39,381 --> 01:18:42,715 ♪ [TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL ♪ ♪ BY FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE] ♪ 1273 01:18:45,012 --> 01:18:48,505 ♪ He walks alone ♪ ♪ under the big city lights ♪ 1274 01:18:48,599 --> 01:18:52,092 ♪ He always knows ♪ ♪ just when the time is right ♪ 1275 01:18:52,144 --> 01:18:55,808 ♪ He never shows what he's thinking, ♪ ♪ he keeps it inside ♪ 1276 01:18:55,898 --> 01:18:59,641 ♪ Because he's too cool for school ♪ 1277 01:18:59,735 --> 01:19:02,978 ♪ He comes alive ♪ ♪ when the sun goes down ♪ 1278 01:19:03,030 --> 01:19:06,523 ♪ He gets it right, ♪ ♪ you know he's always down ♪ 1279 01:19:06,617 --> 01:19:10,451 ♪ He's got one eye open ♪ ♪ and his ear to the ground ♪ 1280 01:19:10,496 --> 01:19:13,534 ♪ And he's too cool for school ♪ 1281 01:19:15,042 --> 01:19:18,455 ♪ He's an operator, ♪ ♪ he's a real player ♪ 1282 01:19:18,504 --> 01:19:20,666 ♪ And if you mess with him you know... ♪ 1283 01:19:20,756 --> 01:19:22,338 [GASPS] 1284 01:19:22,383 --> 01:19:29,050 No-o-o-o-0! 1285 01:19:41,610 --> 01:19:45,148 [CACKLES] Shit, son. Yo, what the deal? 1286 01:19:45,197 --> 01:19:49,862 Yo, if y'all watching this tape right now, that means I didn't make it. 1287 01:19:49,952 --> 01:19:54,037 Either I'm a prisoner, or worse, dead. 1288 01:19:54,081 --> 01:19:58,416 But either way it goes, I'm gonna tell y'all the rules to survive this situation. 1289 01:19:58,502 --> 01:20:01,711 Rule number one: you gotta be quick. 1290 01:20:01,755 --> 01:20:05,123 Rule number two: don't fall down. 1291 01:20:05,217 --> 01:20:10,383 And rule number three: whatever you do, never look back. 1292 01:20:10,431 --> 01:20:12,422 Y'all wish me luck. 1293 01:20:12,516 --> 01:20:14,507 Snatch and run, y'all! 1294 01:20:17,396 --> 01:20:19,808 Come back here, mother fuckers! Son of a bitch! 1295 01:20:19,898 --> 01:20:22,560 ♪ Y'all want drama? ♪ ♪ Wanna make a scary movie? ♪ 1296 01:20:22,651 --> 01:20:25,268 ♪ Rappers comm' in with they team ♪ ♪ and carry toolies ♪ 1297 01:20:25,362 --> 01:20:27,757 ♪ You can jump right out of the screen ♪ ♪ and barely move me ♪ 1298 01:20:27,781 --> 01:20:30,239 ♪ We hard-hitting, ♪ ♪ directing and starring in it ♪ 1299 01:20:30,326 --> 01:20:32,909 ♪ Y'all want drama? ♪ ♪ Wanna make a scary movie? ♪ 1300 01:20:32,995 --> 01:20:35,612 ♪ Rappers comm' in with they team ♪ ♪ and carry toolies ♪ 1301 01:20:35,706 --> 01:20:38,184 ♪ You can jump right out of the screen ♪ ♪ and barely move me ♪ 1302 01:20:38,208 --> 01:20:41,166 ♪ We hard-hitting, ♪ ♪ directing and starring in it ♪ 1303 01:20:42,504 --> 01:20:44,245 ♪ Bad ♪ 1304 01:20:44,298 --> 01:20:46,756 ♪ The bad ♪ 1305 01:20:46,800 --> 01:20:49,383 ♪ The evil ♪ 1306 01:20:49,428 --> 01:20:51,419 ♪ Put 'em together ♪ 1307 01:20:52,765 --> 01:20:55,257 ♪ Two times ♪ 1308 01:20:55,309 --> 01:20:57,300 ♪ Slim Shady ♪ 1309 01:20:58,270 --> 01:21:00,932 ♪ Royce Da 5'9... ♪ 1310 01:21:01,023 --> 01:21:04,436 ♪ Nah, nah, nah, nah, ♪ ♪ I'm gonna slash and gash ♪ 1311 01:21:04,526 --> 01:21:08,736 ♪ Cut another hole in yo' ass, spill blood ♪ ♪ on the walls and play tennis with yo' balls ♪ 1312 01:21:08,781 --> 01:21:10,943 ♪ If the phone rings, ♪ ♪ don't answer the call ♪ 1313 01:21:10,991 --> 01:21:13,608 ♪ I'm gonna slit your throat, ♪ ♪ fuck you like a goat ♪ 1314 01:21:13,702 --> 01:21:15,909 ♪ Peel your foreskin off ♪ ♪ and make a winter coat ♪ 1315 01:21:15,954 --> 01:21:19,663 ♪ I'm a deadly surprise, ♪ ♪ I scoop out both of your eyes ♪ 1316 01:21:19,750 --> 01:21:22,312 ♪ Scrape the meat off your thighs, ♪ ♪ leave your carcass for flies ♪ 1317 01:21:22,336 --> 01:21:25,874 ♪ Cos everyone who meets up with me ♪ ♪ in the end eventually dies ♪ 1318 01:21:25,964 --> 01:21:28,626 ♪ I'm the last thing you see, ♪ ♪ I hang you from a tree ♪ 1319 01:21:28,717 --> 01:21:30,958 ♪ Scare the shit out of you, ♪ ♪ then watch you pee ♪ 1320 01:21:31,011 --> 01:21:33,548 ♪ I'm the bad-ass killer, ♪ ♪ there ain't nobody iller ♪ 1321 01:21:33,639 --> 01:21:35,971 ♪ You're ice-cold dead ♪ ♪ because I'm the fucking killer ♪ 1322 01:21:36,016 --> 01:21:38,508 ♪ I'm the bad ass killer, ♪ ♪ there ain't nobody iller ♪ 1323 01:21:38,602 --> 01:21:40,789 ♪ You're ice-cold dead ♪ ♪ because I'm the fucking killer ♪ 1324 01:21:40,813 --> 01:21:43,475 ♪ I'm gonna slice and dice ♪ ♪ cos murder's my vice ♪ 1325 01:21:43,524 --> 01:21:46,482 ♪ Stab you once, twice, ♪ ♪ maybe even thrice ♪ 1326 01:21:46,568 --> 01:21:49,481 ♪ Carve initials in your liver, ♪ ♪ make you quiver, deliver ♪ 1327 01:21:49,571 --> 01:21:50,902 ♪ Yeah, that'd be nice ♪ 1328 01:21:50,989 --> 01:21:53,651 ♪ I dissect your heart, ♪ ♪ rip your entrails apart ♪ 1329 01:21:53,700 --> 01:21:55,780 ♪ Hack off your head, ♪ ♪ and that's just the start ♪ 1330 01:21:55,828 --> 01:21:58,411 ♪ I put the scary, scary movie, ♪ ♪ make people do a doobie ♪ 1331 01:21:58,497 --> 01:22:01,159 ♪ Make 'em pee-pee up the place ♪ ♪ when they see my ghostly face ♪ 1332 01:22:01,208 --> 01:22:03,603 ♪ You better keep alert ♪ ♪ or you'll be sniffing in the dirt ♪ 1333 01:22:03,627 --> 01:22:06,085 ♪ I got a PhD ♪ ♪ in how to use my cutlery ♪ 1334 01:22:06,171 --> 01:22:08,452 ♪ I make ya kneel and squeal ♪ ♪ or I turn you to a peel ♪ 1335 01:22:08,507 --> 01:22:11,152 ♪ You'll be squirting in yo' shorts ♪ ♪ and then spurting crimson quarts ♪ 1336 01:22:11,176 --> 01:22:13,696 ♪ I chop you, virgin people, ♪ ♪ with my shiny butcher's cleaver ♪ 1337 01:22:13,720 --> 01:22:15,882 ♪ Leave yo' cries in fear, ♪ ♪ it's music to my ears ♪ 1338 01:22:15,973 --> 01:22:18,681 ♪ I cut off Oscar Mayer's wiener, ♪ ♪ I stick it in a bun ♪ 1339 01:22:18,725 --> 01:22:21,037 ♪ Slap on some pickle relish ♪ ♪ and then we have some fun ♪ 1340 01:22:21,061 --> 01:22:23,428 ♪ I'm the bad-ass killer, ♪ ♪ there ain't nobody iller ♪ 1341 01:22:23,522 --> 01:22:25,980 ♪ You're ice-cold dead ♪ ♪ because I'm the fucking killer ♪ 1342 01:22:26,024 --> 01:22:28,391 ♪ I'm the bad-ass killer, ♪ ♪ there ain't nobody iller ♪ 1343 01:22:28,485 --> 01:22:30,817 ♪ You're ice-cold dead ♪ ♪ because I'm the fucking killer ♪ 1344 01:22:30,863 --> 01:22:33,605 ♪ I'm gonna clean your gut, ♪ ♪ treat you like a slut ♪ 1345 01:22:33,699 --> 01:22:36,657 ♪ Mutilate your organs ♪ ♪ and shove 'em up your butt ♪ 1346 01:22:36,702 --> 01:22:41,196 ♪ I'll slit you ear to ear, you know what? ♪ ♪ Then I'll slam a beer ♪ 1347 01:22:41,290 --> 01:22:43,622 ♪ Saw off your toes, ♪ ♪ jam 'em in your nose ♪ 1348 01:22:43,709 --> 01:22:46,121 ♪ Cut your tongue out, ♪ ♪ feed it to a trout ♪ 1349 01:22:46,211 --> 01:22:48,703 ♪ Fry it in a pan, ♪ ♪ shoot it out my can ♪ 1350 01:22:48,755 --> 01:22:51,042 ♪ Aim it at your face, ♪ ♪ then you'll know your place ♪ 1351 01:22:51,091 --> 01:22:58,930 ♪ I promise you pain, ♪ ♪ I'm totally insane ♪ 1352 01:22:59,016 --> 01:23:00,882 ♪ And let me tell you once again ♪ 1353 01:23:00,976 --> 01:23:03,308 ♪ I'm the bad-ass killer, ♪ ♪ there ain't nobody iller ♪ 1354 01:23:03,395 --> 01:23:05,887 ♪ You're ice-cold dead ♪ ♪ because I'm the fucking killer ♪ 1355 01:23:05,981 --> 01:23:08,393 ♪ I'm the bad-ass killer, ♪ ♪ there ain't nobody iller ♪ 1356 01:23:08,484 --> 01:23:11,192 ♪ You're ice-cold dead ♪ ♪ because I'm the fucking killer ♪ 1357 01:23:11,236 --> 01:23:13,568 ♪ I promise you pain, ♪ ♪ I'm totally insane ♪ 1358 01:23:13,614 --> 01:23:16,072 [MAN] Help! Help! 1359 01:23:16,158 --> 01:23:18,650 ♪ I promise you pain, ♪ ♪ I'm totally insane ♪ 1360 01:23:18,744 --> 01:23:21,452 ♪ I promise you pain ♪ 1361 01:23:21,538 --> 01:23:24,826 [MAN] Run, bitch! Run! 1362 01:23:24,917 --> 01:23:26,908 [WOMAN SCREAMS] 1363 01:23:28,420 --> 01:23:31,913 ♪ Like my scrotum, ♪ ♪ here it is in a nutshell ♪ 1364 01:23:38,180 --> 01:23:40,512 [CACKLING] 1365 01:23:40,599 --> 01:23:42,806 ♪ One thousand, nine hundred ♪ ♪ and seventy-two ♪ 1366 01:23:42,893 --> 01:23:45,246 ♪ That's the year I got here ♪ ♪ when my dear mother's water blew ♪ 1367 01:23:45,270 --> 01:23:47,762 ♪ Not really realising the prize ♪ ♪ that's been begot to her ♪ 1368 01:23:47,814 --> 01:23:50,055 ♪ The bona fide lo-fi ♪ ♪ high-octane philosopher ♪ 1369 01:23:50,108 --> 01:23:52,475 ♪ Genius with a penis, ♪ ♪ the few, the proud, the me ♪ 1370 01:23:52,569 --> 01:23:54,731 ♪ I liked me so much ♪ ♪ I had to buy the company ♪ 1371 01:23:54,780 --> 01:23:57,175 ♪ Soul for sale, sold to Satan ♪ ♪ for a hell of a lotta luck ♪ 1372 01:23:57,199 --> 01:23:59,552 ♪ I'm hard to come by ♪ ♪ like a straight guy working at Starbucks ♪ 1373 01:23:59,576 --> 01:24:02,096 ♪ Thank the thinkers that think they thunk ♪ ♪ the thoughts that theorised ♪ 1374 01:24:02,120 --> 01:24:04,307 ♪ Idolised or despised, ♪ ♪ bet I'm getting recognised ♪ 1375 01:24:04,331 --> 01:24:06,976 ♪ Mount Rushmore it? No, ignore it, ♪ ♪ can't rock with no big head ♪ 1376 01:24:07,000 --> 01:24:09,187 ♪ Half of the people want me, ♪ ♪ half of the people want me dead ♪ 1377 01:24:09,211 --> 01:24:11,794 ♪ I am the Angel of Death ♪ ♪ with my rhymes against humanity ♪ 1378 01:24:11,838 --> 01:24:14,125 ♪ Teeter-tottering ♪ ♪ between brilliance and insanity ♪ 1379 01:24:14,216 --> 01:24:16,336 ♪ The one part the Fuhrer, ♪ ♪ the one part the Pope ♪ 1380 01:24:16,426 --> 01:24:19,669 ♪ It's the inevitable return, baby, ♪ ♪ of the Great White Dope ♪ 1381 01:24:23,809 --> 01:24:25,971 ♪ Conclusions you drew, ♪ ♪ proportions you blew ♪ 1382 01:24:26,061 --> 01:24:28,393 ♪ Lost son of Iggy Pop? ♪ ♪ Bigger nose than Ziggy? True ♪ 1383 01:24:28,480 --> 01:24:30,792 ♪ Yes, my name is Jimmy Pop. ♪ ♪ No, my pop's name is Dick ♪ 1384 01:24:30,816 --> 01:24:33,253 ♪ Don't admit to kick it slick, ♪ ♪ you thick derelict critic ♪ 1385 01:24:33,277 --> 01:24:35,644 ♪ Put down for missed notes, ♪ ♪ put up with misquotes ♪ 1386 01:24:35,696 --> 01:24:37,882 ♪ Don't want the whole story? ♪ ♪ Should have bought the Cliffs Notes ♪ 1387 01:24:37,906 --> 01:24:40,301 ♪ Like Finger Painting 101, ♪ ♪ give me no credit for having class ♪ 1388 01:24:40,325 --> 01:24:42,762 ♪ One thumb on the pulse of the nation, ♪ ♪ one thumb in your girlfriend's ass ♪ 1389 01:24:42,786 --> 01:24:45,198 ♪ Written on, written off, ♪ ♪ scoff calling me a joke ♪ 1390 01:24:45,289 --> 01:24:47,475 ♪ I don't think I'm a sell-out, ♪ ♪ but I do enjoy Coke ♪ 1391 01:24:47,499 --> 01:24:50,478 ♪ I struck gold but never took it for granted, ♪ ♪ that's how I planned it, so can it ♪ 1392 01:24:50,502 --> 01:24:52,897 ♪ Around the planet fans demand it ♪ ♪ and you'll never understand it ♪ 1393 01:24:52,921 --> 01:24:54,961 ♪ When I die, no lie, ♪ ♪ plan on mass pandemonium ♪ 1394 01:24:55,007 --> 01:24:57,402 ♪ They may display my brain ♪ ♪ in a pickle jar at the Smithsonian ♪ 1395 01:24:57,426 --> 01:24:59,588 ♪ The one part the Fuhrer, ♪ ♪ the one part the Pope ♪ 1396 01:24:59,678 --> 01:25:02,921 ♪ It's the inevitable return, baby, ♪ ♪ of the Great White Dope ♪ 1397 01:25:11,815 --> 01:25:14,056 ♪ One part the Fuhrer, ♪ ♪ one part the Pope ♪ 1398 01:25:14,151 --> 01:25:16,518 ♪ The inevitable return ♪ ♪ of the Great White Dope ♪ 1399 01:25:16,570 --> 01:25:18,811 ♪ One part the Fuhrer, ♪ ♪ one part the Pope ♪ 1400 01:25:18,864 --> 01:25:21,356 ♪ The inevitable return of ♪ ♪ the Great White Dope ♪ 1401 01:25:21,450 --> 01:25:23,612 ♪ One part the Fuhrer, ♪ ♪ one part the Pope ♪ 1402 01:25:23,702 --> 01:25:26,114 ♪ The inevitable return ♪ ♪ of the Great White Dope ♪ 1403 01:25:26,204 --> 01:25:28,241 ♪ One part the Fuhrer, ♪ ♪ one part the Pope ♪ 1404 01:25:28,332 --> 01:25:30,949 ♪ The inevitable return ♪ ♪ of the Great White Dope ♪ 1405 01:25:31,043 --> 01:25:35,788 ♪ Great White Dope, Great White Dope, ♪ ♪ Great White Dope, Great White Dope... ♪ 1406 01:25:42,554 --> 01:25:46,218 ♪ [FEEL ME BY RAH DIGGA, ♪ ♪ RAMPAGE AND ROCK] ♪ 1407 01:27:19,276 --> 01:27:21,483 This isn't easy for me. 1408 01:27:21,528 --> 01:27:27,991 I know we've been together a long time, but I've found somebody else, OK? 1409 01:27:28,034 --> 01:27:30,025 I'm in love. 1410 01:27:30,662 --> 01:27:32,869 Don't look at me like that. 1411 01:27:33,832 --> 01:27:36,290 We can still be friends. 1412 01:27:36,334 --> 01:27:39,326 You can come into my room whenever you want. 1413 01:27:39,379 --> 01:27:40,869 We just can't... 1414 01:27:40,964 --> 01:27:42,454 No. 1415 01:27:43,800 --> 01:27:45,290 No! 1416 01:27:48,388 --> 01:27:50,379 OK, just one time. 1417 01:27:52,017 --> 01:27:54,008 [MACHINE WHIRS] 1418 01:27:57,063 --> 01:27:59,395 Yeah! That's it! 1419 01:28:01,401 --> 01:28:02,687 Whoo! 1420 01:28:04,780 --> 01:28:06,771 [GURGLING] 1421 01:28:08,408 --> 01:28:10,775 [MOAN OF ECSTASY] 110967