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00:00:00,266 --> 00:00:01,866
♪ I am the stone
The builder refused ♪
2
00:00:01,933 --> 00:00:03,666
♪ I am the visual
The inspiration ♪
3
00:00:03,733 --> 00:00:05,266
♪ That made lady
Sing the blues ♪
4
00:00:05,333 --> 00:00:07,166
♪ I'm the spark
That makes your idea bright ♪
5
00:00:07,233 --> 00:00:08,633
♪ The same spark
That lights the dark ♪
6
00:00:08,700 --> 00:00:10,400
♪ So that you can know
Your left from your right ♪
7
00:00:10,466 --> 00:00:12,966
♪ I am the ballot in your box
The bullet in the gun ♪
8
00:00:13,033 --> 00:00:14,466
♪ The inner glow
That lets you know ♪
9
00:00:14,566 --> 00:00:15,566
♪ To call your brother sun ♪
10
00:00:15,666 --> 00:00:16,866
♪ The story that just begun ♪
11
00:00:16,966 --> 00:00:18,266
♪ The promise
Of what's to come ♪
12
00:00:18,333 --> 00:00:19,466
♪ And I'm a remain a soldier ♪
13
00:00:19,533 --> 00:00:21,400
♪ Till the war is won ♪
14
00:00:21,466 --> 00:00:24,033
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
15
00:00:24,100 --> 00:00:26,700
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
16
00:00:26,766 --> 00:00:29,300
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
17
00:00:29,366 --> 00:00:30,800
♪ Chop, chop, chop ♪
18
00:00:31,866 --> 00:00:33,866
[♪♪♪]
19
00:00:43,233 --> 00:00:44,233
Hey!
20
00:00:44,966 --> 00:00:46,000
[SLOWED VOICE]
Hey!
21
00:00:46,966 --> 00:00:48,933
[VERY SLOWED VOICE]
Hey!
22
00:00:49,033 --> 00:00:51,366
Watch where
you're walking, nigga.
23
00:00:51,433 --> 00:00:53,233
H-hey, what you say, nigga?
24
00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:54,733
HUEY [NARRATING]:
Watch closely.
25
00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:57,800
You're about to experience
a "Nigga Moment."
26
00:00:57,866 --> 00:00:59,900
Webster defines
the "Nigga Moment"
27
00:00:59,966 --> 00:01:02,400
as a moment when ignorance
overwhelms the mind
28
00:01:02,466 --> 00:01:04,866
of an otherwise logical
Negro male--
29
00:01:04,933 --> 00:01:06,966
What did you say,
bitch nigga?
30
00:01:07,033 --> 00:01:08,733
Hey, squeeze it, nigga!
31
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,733
--causing him to act
in an illogical,
32
00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:14,466
self-destructive manner,
i.e., like a nigga.
33
00:01:14,533 --> 00:01:15,933
You want it?
Right here.
34
00:01:21,333 --> 00:01:22,366
[CLICKING]
35
00:01:22,466 --> 00:01:24,733
Nigga Moments
are unpredictable.
36
00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:28,066
Hey, wait, man. Wait.
This is stupid.
37
00:01:28,133 --> 00:01:29,533
Hey, you right, dawg.
38
00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:32,433
Look, let's put the guns away
and go on about our business.
39
00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:34,700
[GUNS COCKING]
MAN: Freeze!
40
00:01:34,766 --> 00:01:36,600
HUEY:
But they all end up bad.
41
00:01:36,666 --> 00:01:39,500
If they had their own category,
Nigga Moments
42
00:01:39,566 --> 00:01:41,933
would be the third leading
killer of black men
43
00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,733
behind pork chops and FEMA.
44
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:46,033
It's a fact.
45
00:01:46,100 --> 00:01:47,866
Now, let's see
how a Nigga Moment
46
00:01:47,933 --> 00:01:49,200
affects a white man.
47
00:01:49,266 --> 00:01:50,500
Prick.
48
00:01:50,566 --> 00:01:52,100
Watch where you walkin', bitch.
49
00:01:52,166 --> 00:01:53,933
What did you--?
50
00:01:54,033 --> 00:01:55,033
Wait a minute.
51
00:01:55,133 --> 00:01:57,333
[CHUCKLES]
I'm white.
52
00:01:59,500 --> 00:02:00,433
Where you goin'?
53
00:02:00,500 --> 00:02:02,033
Don't you ignore me.
54
00:02:02,100 --> 00:02:03,400
This is a perfectly
good moment
55
00:02:03,466 --> 00:02:05,066
to throw your life away.
56
00:02:05,133 --> 00:02:07,800
A big misconception
about the Nigga Moment
57
00:02:07,866 --> 00:02:09,133
is that it can be avoided
58
00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,233
by simply moving away
from niggas.
59
00:02:11,300 --> 00:02:13,266
If only it were that easy.
60
00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:15,766
See, niggas always got
a new trick
61
00:02:15,833 --> 00:02:16,833
right around the corner.
62
00:02:16,900 --> 00:02:19,066
[SCREAMING]
63
00:02:19,133 --> 00:02:20,966
[RAP MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKER]
64
00:02:21,033 --> 00:02:22,300
[HORNS HONKING]
65
00:02:22,366 --> 00:02:24,066
[MAN HUMMING]
66
00:02:24,133 --> 00:02:25,966
♪ Ha-da-da-da, ha ♪
67
00:02:26,933 --> 00:02:27,966
♪ Doo-dah-dah-deh-deh ♪
68
00:02:28,066 --> 00:02:29,066
♪ Tuh ♪
69
00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:32,100
Listen up, boys.
70
00:02:32,166 --> 00:02:34,666
I'm about to sing
the "New Shoes" song.
71
00:02:34,733 --> 00:02:36,266
♪ New shoes ♪
72
00:02:36,333 --> 00:02:39,000
♪ New shoooooes ♪
73
00:02:39,066 --> 00:02:40,233
♪ Woo-hoo ♪
74
00:02:40,300 --> 00:02:42,000
Boy, Nike makes some good shoes.
75
00:02:42,066 --> 00:02:43,100
Hoo!
76
00:02:43,166 --> 00:02:46,233
MAN:
♪ Ave Maria ♪
77
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:47,233
[TIRES SCREECHING]
78
00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:48,766
MAN:
Oh!
79
00:02:49,966 --> 00:02:51,600
[HUMMING]
80
00:02:51,666 --> 00:02:53,833
GRANDDAD:
What the hell?
81
00:02:53,900 --> 00:02:55,933
Hey! What's goin' on, man?
Damn!
82
00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:57,500
I know there's nobody
in my space.
83
00:02:57,566 --> 00:02:59,233
This is handicapped parking.
Isn't it?
84
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:01,000
GRANDDAD:
Don't do that, don't do that!
85
00:03:01,066 --> 00:03:02,933
HUEY:
Yo, man, watch
where you're going.
86
00:03:03,033 --> 00:03:04,466
GRANDDAD:
Stupid son of a bitch!
87
00:03:04,533 --> 00:03:08,400
HUEY:
Every Nigga Moment begins
with the nigga.
88
00:03:08,466 --> 00:03:10,233
Without that key element,
89
00:03:10,300 --> 00:03:13,866
all you're left with is peace
and quiet.
90
00:03:13,933 --> 00:03:17,066
Colonel H. Stinkmeaner is,
and always has been,
91
00:03:17,133 --> 00:03:19,566
a cantankerous, ornery old man.
92
00:03:19,633 --> 00:03:22,700
He spent his childhood
disagreeing with most things,
93
00:03:22,766 --> 00:03:25,133
especially things
involving happiness,
94
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,700
unity and kindness.
95
00:03:27,766 --> 00:03:31,433
Stinkmeaner got no pleasure
seeing sunsets and trees,
96
00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:32,833
dolphins or rainbows.
97
00:03:32,900 --> 00:03:36,000
Man, this some old bullshit.
98
00:03:36,100 --> 00:03:38,633
So he didn't particularly mind
99
00:03:38,700 --> 00:03:41,966
when at age 15,
he lost his sight to cancer.
100
00:03:42,033 --> 00:03:44,266
At least I don't have to look
at your ugly ass no more.
101
00:03:44,333 --> 00:03:46,666
The doctors gave him
three years to live.
102
00:03:46,733 --> 00:03:48,666
So he dedicated
those three years
103
00:03:48,733 --> 00:03:50,400
to spreading a lifetime
of misery and hatred.
104
00:03:50,466 --> 00:03:52,000
You danged fool!
105
00:03:52,066 --> 00:03:55,233
Nobody knows how Stinkmeaner
managed to live so long.
106
00:03:55,300 --> 00:03:58,366
He believed it was his love
of hatred that kept him going.
107
00:03:58,433 --> 00:04:00,833
Who in the hell parked
in my space?
108
00:04:00,900 --> 00:04:03,800
That's like calling
1-800-Collect-An-Ass-Whupping.
109
00:04:03,866 --> 00:04:07,466
And no, that ain't
no toll-free call, partner.
110
00:04:07,533 --> 00:04:09,266
GRANDDAD:
You hit my car!
111
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:10,366
Are you blind?
112
00:04:10,433 --> 00:04:13,700
Yes, I am! So?
113
00:04:13,766 --> 00:04:14,700
Wait. You're blind?
114
00:04:14,766 --> 00:04:15,700
Yes!
115
00:04:15,766 --> 00:04:17,200
Blind!
116
00:04:17,266 --> 00:04:19,933
You got a problem
with that, ni-yagga?
117
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:21,933
You could have killed somebody.
118
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,933
I-I'd be doing them a favor.
119
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:26,466
Getting run over by me
120
00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:28,466
is as close
to an honorable death
121
00:04:28,533 --> 00:04:30,866
as most of these people
are gonna get.
122
00:04:30,933 --> 00:04:35,133
Some days,
I'm quite the humanitarian.
123
00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:38,000
I think I hit a wheelchair
on the way over here. Heh.
124
00:04:38,066 --> 00:04:41,766
Oh, look what you did
to Dorothy.
125
00:04:41,866 --> 00:04:43,266
You'd better have insurance.
126
00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:46,066
Ni-yagga,
you better have insurance!
127
00:04:46,133 --> 00:04:48,100
Ass-whupping insurance.
128
00:04:48,166 --> 00:04:50,866
And you about to pay
a deductible.
129
00:04:50,933 --> 00:04:52,400
HUEY:
And just like that,
130
00:04:52,466 --> 00:04:55,100
my granddad was trapped
in a Nigga Moment.
131
00:04:55,166 --> 00:04:56,533
At this point, he can:
132
00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:59,400
[READING]
133
00:05:04,300 --> 00:05:06,233
Let's see which one he chooses.
134
00:05:06,300 --> 00:05:07,833
[LAUGHS]
135
00:05:07,900 --> 00:05:09,233
That's right.
136
00:05:09,300 --> 00:05:12,033
I backed into your car,
ni-yagga.
137
00:05:12,100 --> 00:05:13,433
What you gonna do?
138
00:05:13,500 --> 00:05:15,766
What you gonna do?
139
00:05:15,866 --> 00:05:17,600
RILEY:
Oh, hell nah.
140
00:05:17,666 --> 00:05:20,866
Granddad, let's whup
this nigga's ass right now.
141
00:05:22,033 --> 00:05:23,733
Bitch-ass, faggot-ass,
142
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:27,166
punk-ass, pussy-ass,
bitch-ass nigga.
143
00:05:27,233 --> 00:05:28,666
Do you wanna do something,
144
00:05:28,733 --> 00:05:31,166
bitch-ass ni-yagga?
145
00:05:31,233 --> 00:05:33,433
Hold up.
[SNIFFS]
146
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,833
I smell new shoes.
147
00:05:35,900 --> 00:05:37,400
RILEY:
Awe, man.
148
00:05:37,466 --> 00:05:38,566
Oh! Not the shoes!
149
00:05:38,633 --> 00:05:40,133
Fool, what you--
Hey!
150
00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:41,600
HUEY:
I've said it before.
151
00:05:41,666 --> 00:05:45,700
Expensive sneakers
are like $150 land mines.
152
00:05:45,766 --> 00:05:48,000
Step on one and boom!
153
00:05:48,066 --> 00:05:50,933
A perfectly rational
black man can explode.
154
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:52,233
Yeah!
155
00:05:52,300 --> 00:05:56,266
They ain't new anymore
are they, ni-yagga?
156
00:05:56,333 --> 00:05:59,000
RILEY:
And that nigga's
spittin' on you.
157
00:05:59,066 --> 00:06:00,333
You better hit him,
Granddad.
158
00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:01,866
Hit him. Hit him! Yeah!
159
00:06:01,933 --> 00:06:03,300
[YELLING]
RILEY: Hit him!
160
00:06:03,366 --> 00:06:04,766
Oh!
161
00:06:04,833 --> 00:06:07,000
[YELLING]
GRANDDAD: Uh-oh.
162
00:06:07,066 --> 00:06:09,766
Yeah!
My bad knee!
163
00:06:09,833 --> 00:06:11,366
Oh, Lordy-Lordy-Lord.
164
00:06:11,433 --> 00:06:13,000
RILEY: What you doing, man?
My bad knee.
165
00:06:13,066 --> 00:06:14,133
RILEY:
Oh, man.
166
00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:15,433
[YELLS]
MAN: Huh?
167
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:17,633
RILEY:
You lose all your pimp status.
168
00:06:17,700 --> 00:06:19,633
[♪♪♪]
169
00:06:19,700 --> 00:06:21,400
This fight is over.
170
00:06:21,466 --> 00:06:23,700
[SURVIVOR'S "EYE OF THE TIGER"
PLAYING OVER RADIO]
171
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,000
♪ It's the eye of the tiger
It's the cream of the fight ♪
172
00:06:26,066 --> 00:06:30,166
♪ Rising up to the challenge
Of our rival ♪
173
00:06:30,233 --> 00:06:31,900
GRANDDAD:
I hate this damn song.
174
00:06:31,966 --> 00:06:33,266
I can't believe you got
175
00:06:33,333 --> 00:06:36,666
your ass kicked
by a blind man, Granddad.
176
00:06:36,733 --> 00:06:39,266
My knee went out.
You know I got a bad knee.
177
00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:41,766
Bad knee?
That nigga had bad eyes.
178
00:06:41,833 --> 00:06:43,633
He couldn't see, Granddad.
179
00:06:43,700 --> 00:06:45,400
He beat you like a piñata.
180
00:06:45,466 --> 00:06:47,100
[LAUGHS]
Nah.
181
00:06:47,166 --> 00:06:51,033
Yo, we can rent Granddad out
for Mexican birthday parties.
182
00:06:51,100 --> 00:06:53,400
We can call him
Señor Piñata.
183
00:06:53,466 --> 00:06:54,500
[CHUCKLES]
184
00:06:54,566 --> 00:06:57,200
Hola, Señor Piñata.
185
00:06:57,266 --> 00:06:58,400
Stop it, boy!
Stop it.
186
00:06:58,466 --> 00:07:00,933
Where's my belt?
187
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,900
RILEY:
Whoo. Whoo.
188
00:07:02,966 --> 00:07:04,333
I must be blind too,
189
00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:07,233
'cause I sure didn't see
that ass-whupping coming.
190
00:07:08,466 --> 00:07:09,733
Boy.
Riley.
191
00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:14,133
Yo, how bad you gotta
telegraph your punches
192
00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:15,333
for a blind nigga
193
00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:16,733
to see 'em coming,
Granddad?
194
00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:19,066
Riley, the man had
a heightened sense of hearing.
195
00:07:19,133 --> 00:07:21,833
Oh, I thought Granddad had
a heightened sense of falling.
196
00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:23,200
Now, that's enough.
197
00:07:23,266 --> 00:07:25,600
Now, you just stop laughing
at your granddaddy.
198
00:07:25,666 --> 00:07:27,833
What's wrong with you?
Granddad had "hit me"
199
00:07:27,933 --> 00:07:29,200
written on his forehead
in Braille.
200
00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:31,400
I said, that's enough!
201
00:07:31,466 --> 00:07:34,100
Okay. What you gonna do?
202
00:07:34,166 --> 00:07:35,166
Beat me?
203
00:07:35,233 --> 00:07:37,633
Maybe I should get
a blindfold first.
204
00:07:37,700 --> 00:07:39,333
Okay, I'm ready.
205
00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:40,433
[RILEY LAUGHS]
206
00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:41,633
Wait.
207
00:07:41,700 --> 00:07:43,933
Maybe he gonna fall on me.
208
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,200
HUEY:
Riley, stop.
209
00:07:46,266 --> 00:07:48,866
Granddad...
Rodney King just called,
210
00:07:48,933 --> 00:07:50,566
and said...
211
00:07:50,633 --> 00:07:53,466
"Damn, I thought
I got my ass whupped!"
212
00:07:53,533 --> 00:07:54,466
[LAUGHS]
213
00:07:54,533 --> 00:07:57,266
Ow!
214
00:07:57,333 --> 00:07:58,900
[♪♪♪]
215
00:08:02,233 --> 00:08:04,133
[RAEKWON'S "GUILLOTINZ
(SWORDZ)" PLAYING]
216
00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:05,500
[VOICES MINGLING]
217
00:08:18,333 --> 00:08:21,833
HUEY:
That night, I dreamt
of a blind swordsman.
218
00:08:21,900 --> 00:08:24,666
♪ Poisonous paragraphs
Smash ya phonograph in half ♪
219
00:08:24,733 --> 00:08:26,966
♪ It be the Inspector Deck
On the warpath ♪
220
00:08:27,033 --> 00:08:28,966
♪ First class
Leavin' mikes with a cast ♪
221
00:08:29,033 --> 00:08:30,733
♪ Causin' ruckus
Like the aftermath ♪
222
00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:32,600
♪ From guns blast
Run fast ♪
223
00:08:32,666 --> 00:08:34,366
♪ Here comes
The verbal assaulter ♪
224
00:08:34,433 --> 00:08:36,666
♪ Rhymes runnin' wild
Like a child in a walker ♪
225
00:08:36,733 --> 00:08:38,533
♪ I scored
From the inner slums abroad ♪
226
00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:40,033
[YELLS]
227
00:08:40,100 --> 00:08:44,000
HUEY:
He knows my every move,
yet, he cannot see.
228
00:08:44,066 --> 00:08:47,466
As my mind fights to make sense
of the impossible,
229
00:08:47,533 --> 00:08:50,033
he has turned my sight
into a liability.
230
00:08:50,100 --> 00:08:51,666
♪ ...To electrify ♪
231
00:08:51,733 --> 00:08:53,866
♪ With voltage of an eel
Truth that I'll reveal ♪
232
00:08:53,933 --> 00:08:56,666
♪ Crush the amateurs
Who screamed to keep it real ♪
233
00:08:56,733 --> 00:08:58,566
♪ Caesar black down
Hoodied up and fatigues ♪
234
00:08:58,633 --> 00:09:01,166
HUEY:
He has no just cause
to want my life.
235
00:09:01,233 --> 00:09:04,266
There is no forethought,
no logic in his actions.
236
00:09:04,333 --> 00:09:06,500
This isn't just any swordsman.
237
00:09:06,566 --> 00:09:09,133
This is
the Blind Nigga Samurai.
238
00:09:09,233 --> 00:09:10,766
What's good, nigga?
239
00:09:10,833 --> 00:09:12,233
What's really good?
240
00:09:12,300 --> 00:09:14,000
[GASPS]
241
00:09:14,066 --> 00:09:16,033
[PANTING]
242
00:09:16,100 --> 00:09:17,166
Niggas.
243
00:09:17,233 --> 00:09:19,233
A Nigga Moment
isn't necessarily over
244
00:09:19,300 --> 00:09:20,866
when you think it's over.
245
00:09:20,933 --> 00:09:22,800
It kind of hangs around
like a unpaid bill.
246
00:09:22,866 --> 00:09:26,066
MAN [OVER TV]:
And in a case of the blind
beating the dumb,
247
00:09:26,133 --> 00:09:28,900
security cameras
from the Woodcrest Square Mall
248
00:09:28,966 --> 00:09:31,200
captured a fight
between a blind old man
249
00:09:31,266 --> 00:09:33,833
and an unidentified assailant
following a parking dispute.
250
00:09:33,900 --> 00:09:34,900
[GROANING]
Aw...
251
00:09:34,966 --> 00:09:37,466
Man.
It's just local news.
252
00:09:37,533 --> 00:09:40,066
MAN 2:
CNN has now confirmed
that it was this man,
253
00:09:40,133 --> 00:09:41,966
Robert Jebediah Freeman,
254
00:09:42,066 --> 00:09:44,366
who got beat up
by a slightly older,
255
00:09:44,433 --> 00:09:46,533
significantly blinder
gentleman.
256
00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:49,000
Police aren't pressing charges
against Mr. Freeman.
257
00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:51,833
They say that ass-whupping
was punishment enough.
258
00:09:51,900 --> 00:09:53,233
We at CNN agree.
259
00:09:53,300 --> 00:09:54,300
Granddad,
I don't think
260
00:09:54,366 --> 00:09:56,233
you should watch
this anymore.
261
00:09:56,300 --> 00:09:58,433
El residente de Woodcrest,
Robert Freeman,
262
00:09:58,500 --> 00:10:02,033
tiene un nuevo apodo:
Señor Piñata.
263
00:10:02,100 --> 00:10:03,533
[BOTH ANCHORS LAUGH]
264
00:10:04,933 --> 00:10:06,300
MAN [ON TV]:
Oh, Patty.
265
00:10:06,366 --> 00:10:07,533
[CLICKS]
266
00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:09,033
Granddad,
you gotta ask yourself,
267
00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:10,333
would you really
be better off
268
00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:13,133
if you had beaten up
a blind old man in the street?
269
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:14,733
It was a Nigga Moment,
Granddad.
270
00:10:14,833 --> 00:10:16,433
[RINGING]
You gotta let it go.
271
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:19,100
Maybe you're right.
272
00:10:19,166 --> 00:10:21,000
You have reached
the Freeman residence.
273
00:10:21,066 --> 00:10:22,966
If this is a lovely cutie-pie,
274
00:10:23,033 --> 00:10:24,500
please leave a message.
275
00:10:24,566 --> 00:10:27,133
Everybody else should just
hang up right now,
276
00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:28,366
because I'm not interested.
277
00:10:28,433 --> 00:10:29,733
[BEEPS]
278
00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:31,633
RUCKUS:
Come on, Robert.
Pick up the phone.
279
00:10:31,700 --> 00:10:34,733
Pick up the phone.
I know you there in hiding.
280
00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,366
I seen you on the news
getting your black ass whupped
281
00:10:37,433 --> 00:10:39,533
by that blind, old monkey.
282
00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:42,000
That's why they shouldn't
let niggas go shopping.
283
00:10:42,066 --> 00:10:43,500
Call me back.
284
00:10:43,566 --> 00:10:46,066
Don't you walk away
from this answering machine.
285
00:10:46,133 --> 00:10:48,233
[♪♪♪]
286
00:10:48,333 --> 00:10:49,933
Granddad,
just let it die.
287
00:10:50,033 --> 00:10:51,233
I promise you,
288
00:10:51,300 --> 00:10:52,733
nobody's gonna call you
a punk.
289
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:53,733
RILEY:
I will.
290
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:56,233
[DOOR CLOSES]
Well, Riley will.
291
00:10:57,366 --> 00:10:58,700
Granddad.
292
00:10:58,766 --> 00:11:00,200
[SIGHS]
293
00:11:05,233 --> 00:11:07,266
[CAR APPROACHING]
294
00:11:08,700 --> 00:11:10,533
[TIRES SQUEALING]
295
00:11:11,866 --> 00:11:14,200
[RAP MUSIC PLAYING
ON CAR RADIO]
296
00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:16,933
[TIRES SCREECH]
297
00:11:17,966 --> 00:11:20,000
[♪♪♪]
298
00:11:32,066 --> 00:11:35,333
I can't believe Granddad went
back to fight that man.
299
00:11:36,933 --> 00:11:37,866
RILEY:
Yo!
300
00:11:37,933 --> 00:11:39,666
Check this out, Huey.
301
00:11:40,933 --> 00:11:42,200
[RAP MUSIC PLAYING]
302
00:11:44,300 --> 00:11:45,833
RILEY:
All right, all right.
303
00:11:45,900 --> 00:11:47,733
Wait. Wait, wait.
304
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,866
Watch. Watch, watch.
W-watch this.
305
00:11:49,933 --> 00:11:52,466
Here it comes.
Here it comes. Oh!
306
00:11:52,533 --> 00:11:53,566
Eat this right here!
307
00:11:53,633 --> 00:11:54,800
That song's shit.
308
00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:56,366
[GROANING]
309
00:11:59,066 --> 00:12:01,033
RILEY:
Hey, you ever notice
310
00:12:01,100 --> 00:12:02,700
whenever someone throws
a chair,
311
00:12:02,766 --> 00:12:04,700
a brawl jumps off?
312
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:06,633
Aren't you worried
about Granddad?
313
00:12:08,433 --> 00:12:10,566
Look, you wanna
see it again?
314
00:12:10,633 --> 00:12:12,666
Hey, look. Look.
L-look, look, see?
315
00:12:12,733 --> 00:12:13,966
I think you don't
even have
316
00:12:14,033 --> 00:12:16,333
to hit nobody
with a chair.
317
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:19,033
And niggas will still
start wilin' out.
318
00:12:19,100 --> 00:12:20,733
[CAR DOOR SHUTS]
319
00:12:22,900 --> 00:12:23,966
[DOOR OPENS]
320
00:12:25,700 --> 00:12:27,700
Well, you don't
look hurt.
321
00:12:27,766 --> 00:12:29,300
Two weeks.
322
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:32,200
Good for you.
A rematch in two weeks.
323
00:12:32,266 --> 00:12:33,733
This'll be great.
324
00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:36,566
Hey, we might be able
to make some money off this.
325
00:12:36,633 --> 00:12:39,066
"The Slugfest
in Woodcrest." Yeah.
326
00:12:40,433 --> 00:12:42,233
[♪♪♪]
327
00:12:43,466 --> 00:12:45,900
You don't understand, boy.
I have to do this.
328
00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:47,000
[SIGHS]
329
00:12:47,066 --> 00:12:48,200
Follow me.
330
00:12:51,433 --> 00:12:53,200
I want you to see
what you're up against.
331
00:12:54,766 --> 00:12:56,733
[TRADITIONAL JAPANESE MUSIC
PLAYING]
332
00:13:13,166 --> 00:13:14,566
[GRUNTING]
333
00:13:16,466 --> 00:13:17,566
[SCREAMS]
334
00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:21,700
[GURGLING]
335
00:13:21,766 --> 00:13:23,466
Holy shit.
336
00:13:23,533 --> 00:13:25,733
You remember the way
he dodged your punch?
337
00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:28,066
Your enemy is the Zatoichi.
338
00:13:28,133 --> 00:13:29,966
The Blind Swordsman.
339
00:13:30,033 --> 00:13:31,566
His ears give him
more information
340
00:13:31,633 --> 00:13:33,233
than all your senses
put together.
341
00:13:33,300 --> 00:13:37,066
If you underestimate him,
he will kill you.
342
00:13:37,133 --> 00:13:38,666
[SCREAMING]
343
00:13:39,933 --> 00:13:40,933
Ah!
344
00:13:42,333 --> 00:13:44,266
You must train.
345
00:13:44,333 --> 00:13:45,733
I won't fail you.
346
00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:47,166
I'm not afraid.
347
00:13:47,233 --> 00:13:49,100
Oh, you will be.
348
00:13:49,166 --> 00:13:51,633
You will be.
349
00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:52,966
[♪♪♪]
350
00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:55,366
GRANDDAD:
And a one, two...
351
00:13:55,433 --> 00:13:57,066
And a three...
Wa-ta!
352
00:13:57,133 --> 00:13:58,533
[BATTLE CRIES]
353
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,666
[GROANING]
354
00:14:06,333 --> 00:14:08,633
Ah. Between me
and you,
355
00:14:08,733 --> 00:14:11,133
your granddad shouldn't
be too worried.
356
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:13,366
Everybody knows
niggas can't fight.
357
00:14:13,433 --> 00:14:14,466
I'm sorry?
358
00:14:14,533 --> 00:14:17,333
You heard me, nigga.
Niggas can't fight.
359
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:19,666
They don't possess
the strength of character
360
00:14:19,733 --> 00:14:22,366
or the mental quickness
to be a great fighter.
361
00:14:22,433 --> 00:14:25,033
That's why all the best
fighters in the world
362
00:14:25,100 --> 00:14:27,500
have always been white men.
363
00:14:27,566 --> 00:14:28,700
Jack Dempsey,
364
00:14:28,766 --> 00:14:30,366
Rocky Marciano,
365
00:14:30,433 --> 00:14:31,733
"Slyvester" Stallone.
366
00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:34,033
And don't forget
Ralph Macchio.
367
00:14:34,100 --> 00:14:37,066
You name me one great
black heavyweight fighter.
368
00:14:37,133 --> 00:14:38,833
Name one. Go ahead.
Try and name one.
369
00:14:38,900 --> 00:14:39,933
See that?
You can't do it.
370
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:41,133
What?
What, what, what?
371
00:14:41,233 --> 00:14:43,533
Oh, oh, oh. You wanna pull Ali
out your ass?
372
00:14:43,633 --> 00:14:44,966
That what you
thinking about?
373
00:14:45,033 --> 00:14:46,166
Muhammad Ali?
374
00:14:46,233 --> 00:14:47,533
Well, if that nigga's
so tough,
375
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:50,033
then why he didn't
go to Vietnam?
376
00:14:50,100 --> 00:14:51,233
I'll tell you why.
377
00:14:51,300 --> 00:14:53,033
'Cause he was scared.
That's why.
378
00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:56,633
Shoot. "No Vietnamese
ever called me nigga."
379
00:14:56,700 --> 00:14:58,566
I call him a nigga
eight times
380
00:14:58,633 --> 00:15:00,400
before I have breakfast.
381
00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:02,633
Now, what he gonna do?
Hold on, I'll make it nine.
382
00:15:03,766 --> 00:15:05,333
Nigga!
383
00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:07,466
[TRADITIONAL JAPANESE MUSIC
PLAYING]
384
00:15:13,466 --> 00:15:15,733
I don't understand
why I'm blindfolded.
385
00:15:15,833 --> 00:15:17,833
HUEY:
Because the enemy
cannot see.
386
00:15:17,900 --> 00:15:19,900
But, see, the thing is,
387
00:15:19,966 --> 00:15:22,733
I don't have super hearing,
so I don't get why I'm--
388
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,433
HUEY: Fight!
[YELLING]
389
00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:26,033
Ow!
390
00:15:26,100 --> 00:15:27,300
Stop!
391
00:15:28,833 --> 00:15:30,266
Jean-Claude Van Damme
392
00:15:30,333 --> 00:15:32,166
is the best martial artist
in the world.
393
00:15:32,233 --> 00:15:34,533
He killed a man
with his butt cheek power.
394
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:37,066
Steven Seagal, David Carradine,
395
00:15:37,133 --> 00:15:38,100
Chuck Norris.
396
00:15:38,166 --> 00:15:40,100
Shoot. Walker, Texas Ranger?
397
00:15:40,166 --> 00:15:42,033
Now, that's a karate man
right there.
398
00:15:42,100 --> 00:15:43,166
[GRANDDAD SCREAMING]
399
00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:45,000
[CRUNCH]
400
00:15:45,066 --> 00:15:48,400
HUEY:
Word got out that my granddad
was training for a rematch,
401
00:15:48,466 --> 00:15:50,766
and it quickly became
the talk of the town.
402
00:15:55,133 --> 00:15:56,500
What was that?
403
00:15:56,566 --> 00:15:57,700
An exhibition?
404
00:15:58,933 --> 00:16:01,666
You need emotional content.
405
00:16:02,933 --> 00:16:04,633
Now, try again.
406
00:16:04,700 --> 00:16:06,766
Oooooh-ah-da!
407
00:16:11,566 --> 00:16:13,300
Damn! That hurt.
408
00:16:13,366 --> 00:16:14,433
Damn it, boy!
409
00:16:14,500 --> 00:16:15,500
Hoo. Haa.
410
00:16:15,566 --> 00:16:16,733
Ooh.
411
00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:20,166
Everybody knows niggas
climb trees, not kick 'em.
412
00:16:20,266 --> 00:16:22,233
[LAUGHS]
413
00:16:22,333 --> 00:16:24,066
HUEY:
Riley had the brilliant idea
414
00:16:24,133 --> 00:16:27,066
to take advance orders for
the DVD release of the fight,
415
00:16:27,133 --> 00:16:29,366
and take a little action
on the side.
416
00:16:29,433 --> 00:16:30,766
GRANDDAD:
Ugh! Pain.
417
00:16:34,866 --> 00:16:38,066
He hired a street team
to create the necessary hype.
418
00:16:38,133 --> 00:16:40,366
[♪♪♪]
419
00:16:56,266 --> 00:16:57,566
[PEOPLE CHATTERING]
420
00:16:59,633 --> 00:17:02,533
HUEY:
The fight had a huge turnout.
421
00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:03,766
MAN:
Come on...
422
00:17:03,833 --> 00:17:07,100
Seems like watching
niggas act stupid
423
00:17:07,166 --> 00:17:09,966
was becoming America's
favorite pastime.
424
00:17:10,033 --> 00:17:11,466
Hey, listen up!
425
00:17:11,533 --> 00:17:13,833
I'm gonna tell y'all
one more time.
426
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:18,000
This fight ain't startin'
till I get $10 from all y'all.
427
00:17:18,066 --> 00:17:21,366
Hey. You. Nah, nigga,
I didn't get yours yet.
428
00:17:21,433 --> 00:17:22,833
Give me that.
429
00:17:22,900 --> 00:17:25,333
That's the difference
between private Nigga Moments
430
00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:26,833
and public Nigga Moments.
431
00:17:26,900 --> 00:17:28,633
A private Nigga Moment
shames you.
432
00:17:28,733 --> 00:17:32,200
A public Nigga Moment
shames the whole race.
433
00:17:32,266 --> 00:17:34,800
Ooh, this is it.
434
00:17:34,866 --> 00:17:37,300
I'm gonna kick
some ass now.
435
00:17:37,366 --> 00:17:40,833
Granddad, the only way to win
is not to fight.
436
00:17:40,900 --> 00:17:42,333
That's right, Robert.
437
00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:45,133
Nobody's gonna call you
a fruity boy
438
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:48,400
or a pansy pants
if you don't do this.
439
00:17:48,466 --> 00:17:49,566
RILEY:
I will.
440
00:17:49,633 --> 00:17:51,833
Right.
Well, Riley will.
441
00:17:51,900 --> 00:17:54,166
MAN:
I mean, everybody's
real focused so far.
442
00:17:55,466 --> 00:17:56,400
MAN 2:
Here we go.
443
00:17:56,466 --> 00:17:58,166
[CROWD MURMURING]
444
00:17:58,233 --> 00:17:59,500
You scared?
445
00:17:59,566 --> 00:18:02,500
Yeah. You scared,
ain't ya, bitch nigga?
446
00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:04,366
I can smell
the bitch in ya.
447
00:18:04,433 --> 00:18:07,400
[SNIFFING]
Hm, hm, mm...
448
00:18:07,466 --> 00:18:09,266
Ooh, that's
vintage bitch.
449
00:18:09,333 --> 00:18:11,800
You must have
Alzheimer's, old man.
450
00:18:11,866 --> 00:18:13,800
You already forgot
that ass-whupping?
451
00:18:13,866 --> 00:18:15,366
Uh-oh. Huh-huh.
452
00:18:15,433 --> 00:18:17,166
Oh, I hear ya coming.
453
00:18:17,233 --> 00:18:20,566
HUEY:
And as I watched Stinkmeaner
move blindly around the ring,
454
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:23,266
I had a terrifying realization.
455
00:18:23,333 --> 00:18:25,300
He wasn't a trained swordsman,
456
00:18:25,366 --> 00:18:27,833
and he didn't have
super hearing.
457
00:18:27,900 --> 00:18:31,333
He was a blind, old man
who had just gotten lucky.
458
00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:35,166
Granddad! Wait!
No, stop!
459
00:18:41,500 --> 00:18:43,333
RILEY:
Come on, Granddad.
460
00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:44,600
[CROWD CHATTERING]
461
00:19:00,233 --> 00:19:01,566
I'm gonna
keep comin' anyway!
462
00:19:01,633 --> 00:19:03,566
[YELLING]
463
00:19:03,633 --> 00:19:05,466
MAN:
Damn! Kick him
in the nut.
464
00:19:05,533 --> 00:19:08,133
[BATTLE CRY]
465
00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:13,233
You know, we could all
be reading a book right now.
466
00:19:15,500 --> 00:19:17,233
[SCREAMS]
467
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:24,766
MAN 3:
He got what
he deserved, man.
468
00:19:24,833 --> 00:19:26,000
MAN:
Come on, now.
469
00:19:26,066 --> 00:19:27,433
Wait a minute.
470
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:30,033
MAN 2:
Oh. Oh, my goodness.
471
00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:31,166
I can't believe it.
472
00:19:31,233 --> 00:19:33,633
RILEY:
Dang, Granddad!
473
00:19:33,700 --> 00:19:35,266
You didn't have to kill him.
474
00:19:35,333 --> 00:19:37,366
HUEY:
And so, Granddad emerged
475
00:19:37,433 --> 00:19:40,033
from the Nigga Moment
victorious.
476
00:19:40,100 --> 00:19:41,733
Congratulations,
Robert.
477
00:19:41,833 --> 00:19:44,533
I told you a nigga
that black couldn't fight.
478
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:47,033
Whew! Good goin'.
479
00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:48,533
MAN 4:
Hey, that wasn't worth it, man.
480
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:49,700
I had my fingers crossed.
481
00:19:49,766 --> 00:19:50,900
MAN 5:
I want my money.
482
00:19:50,966 --> 00:19:51,966
MAN 6:
You owe me money, man.
483
00:19:52,033 --> 00:19:53,433
Gimme my money back!
484
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:55,966
I want my money now.
485
00:19:56,033 --> 00:19:57,666
Gimme my damn money, kid.
486
00:19:57,733 --> 00:20:01,100
[RAP MUSIC PLAYING]
487
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:04,500
WOMAN:
Oh, my God, a chair!
488
00:20:04,566 --> 00:20:05,966
MAN 7:
Hey, what does he think--?
489
00:20:09,300 --> 00:20:11,833
MAN:
I'm mad, man!
490
00:20:11,900 --> 00:20:14,666
[YELLING & GRUNTING]
491
00:20:15,433 --> 00:20:16,633
Niggas.
492
00:20:16,700 --> 00:20:18,066
[SIRENS WAILING]
493
00:20:18,133 --> 00:20:20,233
HUEY:
As he contemplated
spending the remainder
494
00:20:20,300 --> 00:20:22,100
of his natural life in prison,
495
00:20:22,166 --> 00:20:24,266
Granddad never stopped
to realize
496
00:20:24,333 --> 00:20:26,700
that he had gotten the respect
he so desperately wanted.
497
00:20:26,766 --> 00:20:30,333
Yo, that mug killed a blind,
old man with his bare hands.
498
00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:32,633
Now, that's
gangsta.
499
00:20:32,700 --> 00:20:35,600
Robert Jebediah
Freeman?
500
00:20:36,966 --> 00:20:38,900
Tom and I had gotten
the fight licensed
501
00:20:38,966 --> 00:20:42,400
by the state boxing commission
at the last minute,
502
00:20:42,466 --> 00:20:45,666
legally indemnifying Granddad
against Stinkmeaner's death.
503
00:20:45,733 --> 00:20:49,166
But he was still pretty
shook up by the whole thing.
504
00:20:49,266 --> 00:20:53,066
Colonel Stinkmeaner had
no family and no friends.
505
00:20:53,133 --> 00:20:56,366
He lived a life without love
or companionship,
506
00:20:56,433 --> 00:20:57,600
or even pets.
507
00:20:57,666 --> 00:21:00,333
He was a horrible,
awful human being.
508
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:03,233
And in truth, the world
was better off with him dead.
509
00:21:03,300 --> 00:21:05,300
Still, he was our brother.
510
00:21:05,366 --> 00:21:07,833
Lord, please forgive us
for taking this man's life.
511
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:09,866
Why you say "us"?
You killed him--
512
00:21:09,933 --> 00:21:12,066
Shut your ass and pray, boy.
513
00:21:12,133 --> 00:21:14,400
[♪♪♪]
514
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,300
[♪♪♪]
35580
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