Original subtitles

- Are you ready, kids?

kids: Aye, aye, Captain!

- I can't hear you.

kids: Aye, aye, Captain!

- ♪ Ohh... ♪

♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- ♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he ♪

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- ♪ If nautical nonsense be something you wish ♪

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- ♪ Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish ♪

kids: SpongeBob SquarePants! - Ready?

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

- SpongeBob

SquarePants!

[laughing]

[flute plays]

[waves crashing]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Ah, uh...

[whimpering] [crowd clamoring]

Hold on! Hold on!

Coming right up! - Now!

- Give me a second! - Order up, up, up!

[clamoring continues] - Mr. Squidward!

Why haven't you taken out the trash?

- [munching, groans]

[crowd clamoring] - I'm swamped, Mr. Krabs!

Why are you wearing a towel? [crowd clamoring]

- Well, obviously, I was in me sauna.

Being a manager is hard work, you know?

- You have to do better.

- Can't you help me a little bit?

- A manager does not do grunt work.

That's what Squidwards are for.

[laughs]

- Hmmph!

I deserve to be manager and sit on my butt all day.

But will I ever get promoted?

- Are you tired of being a loser?

- Yes. [sputters]

Wait, who said that?

- Wouldn't you rather be a weenie?

- Um, not exactly.

- Weenie Hut Jr.'s is now hiring managers.

Your responsibilities will include...

- Whoa.

- Kicking back, relaxing, and letting robots

do all of the grunt work.

- Righteous.

[slurping]

- Apply now to Weenie Hut Jr.'s

and become a pivotal cog in the corporate machine.

[static whirs] - A manager?

That's for me!

Whoo-hoo!

- Whoa! - So long, Krusty Krab!

- So long!

- Where is that blasted cashier?

He's already an hour late.

And who the heck is this old lady?

- I smell pickles.

- Mr. Krabs, isn't Squidward looking

better than ever these days?

- What? That ain't Squidward.

- Hmm? It's not?

Why is she wearing his hat?

Where is he? Is he lost?

Why is he so late? Squidward!

[panicked panting]

I'm coming to find you!

[grunting] Squidward!

[panting]

- Uh-huh.

- Ah!

- Yeah, mm-hmm.

- Squidward!

Oh, I'm so glad I found you!

Now, let's get you back to the Krusty Krab.

- Oh, I don't think so.

I'm not going back to the Krusty Krab ever.

[grunts] Because now I am a pivotal cog

in the corporate machine.

- Oh, no! That sounds horrible.

- Oh, no. It sounds like I'm the manager here.

- [gasps]

- Which also means I decide

who stays and who goes.

Oh, Weenie Bots.

Kick out this riffraff.

Both: As you command, Weenie.

- [whimpering]

Whoa!

- Attention, Weenie Bots.

As your new manager,

I'll be making a few changes around here.

- Uh-oh.

- All music in the jukebox will now be...

smooth jazz.

All Weenie-themed art

will now be fine art.

And, lastly, under no circumstances

is anyone allowed to interrupt my manager time.

[door slams]

[sighs contentedly] Being a manager is hard work.

[laughs]

- Boss Weenie, you must take out the trash.

- Why can't you do it?

- My extension cord won't reach.

- [grunts] Still better...

[grunts] Than the Krusty...

[grunts] Krab.

[sighs]

[garage door slams]

[shattering]

[shouting, grunts]

Hey! Open that door!

[bots laughing]

- [panting]

[grunts]

both: Hooray. Celebration.

Celebration.

Glug, glug, glug.

- Huh?

[growling]

[grunting]

Aah!

[grunts]

- Oh, good. You are back.

- Weenie.

- [growling]

[exclaims]

[grunts]

All right, Squidward.

It's time for a little managerial work.

"How to Repair Unruly Robots."

Hmm.

[tools clattering]

[bell dings]

[sighs] That ought to do the trick.

Weenie Bots, bring me a weenie.

both: Yes, Mr. Manager.

[machinery whirring]

[sizzling]

- [chomping] Oh.

I did it!

They're perfect employees now.

Weenie Bots, run the store.

[chomping]

I'm having manager time.

both: Yes, Mr. Manager.

[customers clamoring]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[bell dings]

- Ooh!

- [playing clarinet off-key]

[bell dings] - [munching]

[cash register bell dings, slurping]

[cash register bell dings]

[crowd sighing contentedly]

♪ ♪

[music box lullaby playing]

- [screams] - Mr. Manager.

- Can't you see I'm trying to sleep?

I mean manage.

- The president

of the Weenie Hut Corporation is arriving.

- [panicked yelping] Why didn't you say so?

[panting, grunting]

Oh.

[regal music]

♪ ♪

What a weenie.

- Weenie J. Weiner.

The J stands for Junior.

You must be Squidward Q. Tentacles.

- The Q stands for Quincy.

To what do I owe this honor?

- Your success has been all the buzz down at headquarters.

- Oh!

- So I came straightaway to offer you

the big promotion.

- Finally, someone recognizes my worth.

[camera shutter clicks] Oh.

- But, first, you'll need to take

our upper-management course.

Please, step into my weeniecopter.

♪ ♪

- [grunting]

- Welcome to Weenie Hut Senior's!

- Oh, wow.

both: Congratulations, Weenie.

- Congratulations, Weenie. - Congratulations, Weenie.

- There sure are a lot of robots working here.

- Yes, robots are so much more efficient

and sanitary.

- Welcome, Weenie.

- Please, have a seat.

Now lie back and think of weenies.

- What exactly is this management course?

- Well, you see, Squidward, we are going to turn you

into the most efficient manager you can be...

- [whimpers]

- By turning you into a... [machinery whirring]

Robot.

- Oh, a robot, well, that sounds just--

[screams]

Help me!

- Oh, we are helping you, Squidward.

You will be... [machinery whirring]

One of us.

[suspenseful music]

- Typical.

[screaming]

- [cackling]

- [screaming]

Oh!

- [cackling] [cannon fires]

- Huh?

- Ahoy there, Squidward.

We're here to save you.

- How did you even know I was here?

- [cackling]

- I knew you were in danger.

My squiddy sense was tingling.

- I don't want to know what that means.

Just get me out of here!

- All right, SpongeBob, load her up.

- She's ready!

[grunts] Watch your head.

[grunts]

- Whoo-hoo!

Pinchy, pinchy.

- [cackling] Huh?

- Cutie, cutie, cutie, cutie.

- [screaming]

- That brat's gonna burst!

- [screaming] [alarm blaring]

- Yummy weenie.

- Ow. - [exclaims]

- Looks like we got here just in time.

Good to see ya, pal. - Oof!

[machinery whirring]

[screaming]

- Order up, Squidward! [bell dinging]

Gee, it sure is great to have you back.

- Sigh. Please unplug me.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- "The belly of inspiration lies in the midst of your gut."

[sighs]

Welp, I better return this wonderful book to the library

before it's due.

Ah!

[groans]

[grunts]

SpongeBob, what did I tell you about standing too close to me?

- Oh, you said...

[imitating Squidward] If you keep standing too close to me,

I'm going to trip over you.

- I rest my case...

and my face.

- [normal voice] Sorry, Squidward.

I just wanted to invite you to go with me and Patrick.

We have a really fun day planned.

Mm! - Oh, shucks and golly gee.

I really wish I could come and have big fun

with you and Patrick.

Eeh!

- But?

- But I have to return my favorite book

of daily affirmations to the library by noon,

or I'll have to pay a penalty.

- You mean this book? [clears throat]

"In life, 'tis better to play hide-and-seek with the trees

than checkers with the wind."

Hey, that's what Patrick always says.

- No, he doesn't.

Get your own affirmations.

[blimp humming overhead]

- Hi, SpongeBob.

[grunting]

Here we go!

- Ha, 9:00 a.m.--

plenty of time before the deadline.

Yeah, you have to get up pretty early in the morning.

And I did.

[mutters] Ah, there it is--

book returns, top floor.

[elevator bell dings]

both: Hey, Squidward. Going up?

- Ah! Uh, I'll take the next one.

[elevator bell dinging]

[gasps]

[sighs contentedly]

both: Squidward! - Huh?

both: Hold the door!

- Close the door. Close the door. Close the door.

[both panting, elevator bell dinging]

[both straining]

- Thanks for holding the door, Squidward.

- [grumbles]

I thought you yo-yos had a big day of fun planned.

Why aren't you there?

- We are there, Squidward,

because today is...

both: Elevator Riding Day!

Wa-hoo!

- [growls]

I feel my anger.

But I am calm like a plate of linguine.

Patrick, be a dear

and hit the top-floor button for me, please.

- Top floor!

Going up--right after we hit all these other floors.

- [gasps] What are you doing?

- Yeah, Patrick, what are you doing?

You missed one.

Boop. Every floor counts!

Hey!

- Top floor first. Top floor first.

[electricity crackling]

[elevator rumbling]

Oh, no, we're trapped, trapped like sardines!

- Don't worry, Squidward.

This happens to us all the time.

- Yeah, last week we only had to wait five hours.

- "Five hours"?

That's past the book-return deadline!

[grunting]

Like a plate of linguine. [sighs contentedly]

Hey, why don't we just use the emergency phone

and call for help?

- Well, if you want to do it the easy way.

[line trilling] - Hello?

- Hello. Oh, thank Neptune.

- Oh, thank Neptune.

- I didn't think this phone would work.

- I didn't think this phone would work.

- I'm trapped in an elevator.

- I'm trapped in an elevator.

- Stop saying what I'm saying!

- Stop saying what I'm saying.

- I really am trapped in an elevator.

- I really am trapped in an elevator.

[both growling] - Gosh!

Oh, you're no help at all.

- [rasping] You're no help at all.

both: Idiot!

- [growls]

"Relaxation is the tippy toe to tranquility."

[sighs]

- Now you relax.

Patrick can fix it.

- Yeah, my dad was an elevator surgeon

for a whole day.

- He was a what?

- Screwdriver.

Hmm.

[grunts]

And now to connect the right wires.

[electricity fizzing]

That's not it.

- Wait, Patrick, don't!

- [growls]

- Patrick.

[rumbling]

[all screaming]

- Enough! Get me out of here!

[grunting]

[shouts]

Why won't these stupid doors open?

[elevator bell dings]

Huh?

- Squidward!

Grab my hand!

- Huh?

[whimpering]

[groans]

[grunting]

[mellow music]

♪ ♪

- That was a close one, huh, Squidward?

- What's that?

both: A door.

[ethereal music]

- [straining] Hurry!

- Good luck, losers.

- Thanks, Squidward.

- Finally, that book is getting returned on time.

Thank Neptune!

both: Hey, Squidward. - Huh?

both: You're back.

[suspenseful musical sting]

- [grunts]

both: Now give us a boost.

- "Serenity floats on an ocean of cheese."

[sighs contentedly]

[stomach growling]

I'm starving.

How long have we been stuck in here?

- Don't worry, Squidward.

While you were out, I ordered a pizza.

- Give me that, you pea brain.

We can call for help.

[cell phone beeping]

Of course.

[elevator bell dings] - Pizza delivery.

- Thanks.

- We're saved!

[alarm ringing] Patrick!

[straining]

- All right! Let's eat!

- Eat what?

[stomach growling]

- Now I'm starving, and my book is going to be late.

[grunts]

"Only when all is lost can you see inside your nostrils

and find yourself."

[sighs contentedly]

[both inhaling, exhaling deeply]

- [grunting]

Oh, ah.

[gasps, laughs]

I'm free!

After 22 years,

I finally got out of that cursed elevator.

[laughing]

W-what? Huh?

[elevator bell dings] Another elevator?

[elevator bell dings] [screams]

- Greetings, stranger.

Welcome to our island of tranquility.

both: Going up. [gong sounding]

- This is a lot nicer than my old elevator.

Mind if I stay here a while?

- You'll have to ask the king.

both: Going up. [gong sounding]

- The king? - Did someone say my name?

- Oh, wise King Squidward.

This weary traveler wishes to stay with us.

- Please, King, can we keep him?

- Hmm. Let me consult the book.

[bell dings, ethereal singing]

both: The book. The book.

- "A friend in need is a servant guaranteed."

[bell dings]

The book says yes!

both: Going up! [gong sounding]

- Of course you can stay with us, my child.

We'll teach you the ways of the book.

And you'll get to spend every day

worshipping me.

[eerie music]

both: You'll be just like us.

- Oh, gee.

Oh, hey, is that the doorbell?

I-I think I left the oven on.

[laughs] Whoo!

[screams] [thud]

- Listen, my people,

the book says it's time for me to relax.

[knocking] Huh?

- Hello? Are you all right in there?

- Yes, yes, I'm all right! Get me out!

Oh, thank you.

Thank you for rescuing me from these stupid--

- Are you Squidward Tentacles? - Yes.

- We've been looking for you.

We're the library police.

You have a withdrawn book that is now 30 seconds overdue.

And you'll have to pay the penalty.

- What do I owe you-- like, a nickel?

[laughs] - You're going to library jail.

- [sighs contentedly] Library jail--

how relaxing.

"I appreciate myself by taking time to recharge

"with my best friend--

me."

[sighs contentedly]

[elevator whirring, bell dings]

both: Oh, wise king, we missed you so.

- Why, Neptune?

Why?

- We had overdue books, too.

both: Going up. [gong sounding]

- [grunting] Going up!