All language subtitles for Leverage Redemption S03E03 - The Scared Stiff Job (Awafim.tv)

[rhythmic beeping]

[cries]

I'm going to miss you so much, Dad.

[cries] But your grandson
will carry on your name.

I promise.

[beeping continues]

[sniffles, cries]

[grunting]

[sighs]

- [steady beep]
- [crying]

- [person] Sorry. Excuse me. Pardon me.
- [daughter] Wait.

- [relative] Who are these people?
- We're not done saying goodbye.

Hi. Pete Luna. Gift of Time.

So sorry, sweetheart.
Gotta move fast with these things.

- Gisele?
- What things?

- Prepare to move the client.
- Your dad didn't tell you?

Tell me what? Stop! That's my father!

And if you ever loved him,
you don't want to do that.

None of this works
if we don't get the body cooled down ASAP.

None of what works?

- Cryonics.
- [employee 1] Let's get this ice moving.

- You know, like Ted Williams?
- What?

A lot of people think Disney did it.
That's an urban legend.

- You're not freezing my father.
- No. We call it vitrification.

I don't care what you call it.

We are his family,
and we decide what happens to his body.

- Yeah. No.
- [employee 2] Ready for prep.

See, your, uh, dad, he signed a contract.

- Wait. [cries]
- [Peter] Here, this one is your copy.

Excuse me. Um.

Yeah, feel free
to bring that to your attorney,

but I assure you all the i's are dotted
and the t's are crossed.

But don't worry.

Your father's body will be safe with us.

- [inhales deeply]
- So long as you pay the storage fees.

Storage fees?

[sighs]

[Sophie] Storage fees?

What Luna didn't tell us that day
was that, at the seven year mark,

those fees would balloon.

There's a "trigger" in the contract,

which I'm sure my father signed
under duress.

You don't think
he signed on his own free will?

I never once heard my father
mention anything about cryonics.

You think he was manipulated?

- Hey, Mom!
- You rascal. Get over here. [chuckles]

I didn't know it at the time,

but the day I told my dad I was pregnant

was the very same day
he got his terminal cancer diagnosis.

It was also the same day
he signed that evil contract.

[Sophie] Huh.

Peter Luna preyed on your father
in his darkest hour.

My dad was not some narcissist
who wanted to live forever.

- No.
- [scoffs]

He just... he wanted to believe
that he could meet his grandchild.

And now, his body storage fees
are bankrupting us.

My mom and dad
started this nursery from scratch

after they emigrated from Madagascar.

It's the family business.

By the end of the month,
it'll belong to Peter Luna.

Not the outcome
your father would have wanted.

It's the opposite.

Family was everything to my dad.

Let me tell you something.

You see that banana tree?

In Madagascar, there's an old folktale
my dad used to tell us all the time.

When God created the first man and woman,
he gave them a choice in how they died.

They could either die like the moon,
or like the banana tree.

The moon dies every month
and is resurrected

in a cycle that repeats forever.

The banana tree dies only once
and is gone forever.

But before it dies
it sends out little green shoots

that become new banana trees.

And here's your little green shoot.

Exactly. [sniffles]

Can you help us?

Peter Luna.

He seems nice.

He trawls oncology wards,

looking for patients who have
just been given a terminal diagnosis.

He convinces them that they're gonna
be resurrected in the very near future

when medical technology
is advanced enough to save them.

Despite the fact
that no one's ever been revived

and the technology doesn't work,
he gets them to sign on the dotted line.

And after they die, he slowly bankrupts
the family until he owns it all.

Including the body.

Why does he keep all the bodies?

Mmm. That's a question
with no good answer.

Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news,

but I have reviewed the contract,
and it is solid.

What he's doing is all perfectly legal.

Of course it is.

Because the US isn't so much a country
as it is a giant Ponzi scheme.

Now, people have a right to decide
what to do with their body after they die.

What if I said I wanted
to be taxidermied like...

that, and installed right about there?

I would respect your choice.
Probably never come back here again.

Oh, FYI.

You can do whatever
you want with my meat sack.

Hardison and I won't be needing ours
anymore once we get our robot bodies,

thank you very much.

- [both] Meat sack?
- Mmm.

Eliot?

Oh, he wants to be torn apart
and eaten by a pack of wolves,

so he can be a part of the pack forever,
for every generation to come.

How do you know that?

I never said that out loud.

I was just gonna go with cremated,

but the wolf thing sounds...
That sounds cool.

What about you, Sophie?

I just want to be buried beside Nate.

I didn't expect this job
to affect me so much...

'Cause, Parker, yeah,
our bodies are just vessels.

But they're vessels that we love.

That we live with.

If... If anyone
were to steal Nate's body, I...

[chuckles]

Laying our loved ones to rest,

in whatever way feels right,
it gives us rest too.

I'm sorry, I--

Don't apologize. You're right.

Let's give this guy hell.

[gasps] We should Christmas carol him.

We're not doing the Christmas carol thing.

You know how many times
Hardison tried that.

There's too many moving parts.

Okay. So Hardison couldn't.

No. It's too soon to be pitching cons.
We need to investigate this guy further.

Oh, yeah.

[Breanna] I got into the security cameras.

There are five other businesses
besides Peter Luna's.

I can't believe
such a normal looking building

is housing an army of sub-zero undead.

Yeah. Well, most military cryonics
research facilities are all the same.

The normal buildings are upstairs.

Labs, they're in the basement.

Just in case something goes wrong,
they can lock it down.

Wait, are you telling me
you've fought zombies?

Oh. Yeah.

All right. Breanna tracked flowers
going to Peter Luna's office.

- That's our ticket. [grunts]
- [sighs]

- [Parker gasps]
- We didn't rehearse a slap.

You think it's funny?
Humiliating me like that?

Babe. Babe.
I-I-I didn't even notice it, okay?

I-I don't know what I'm doing.
I'm an idiot.

Course you didn't.
'Cause you only think of yourself.

Oh, right on time, my flowers.

- Thank you. No, no. I need these.
- Ah, ah. I need ID.

I need these.

I left it in the van. Listen to me, okay?

I posted a picture of my wife yesterday
and put it on the Internet

and she said her hair was messed up.
Okay? It looked fine to me.

She said something about flyaways.
I don't know what those are.

You are the only thing standing in the way
of me making up with my wife

and me sleeping on the couch for a week.

So have a heart.

[sighs] Thank you. Thank you.

Ma'am. Ma'am.

You need to check in.

Ma'am.

Oh, wow.

That is a gorgeous chair.

Titanium, huh?
Probably light as a feather.

And you got the top-of-the-line
power assist unit.

- You know wheelchairs?
- Well, I'm a veteran.

So I got a lot of friends in chairs,

but their chairs are not
as pretty as yours, I'll tell you that.

Then again,
my friends are not as pretty as you.

Well, that's an awfully
sweet thing of you to say.

Just because somebody
says something sweet,

doesn't mean it's not true, Ivy.

How are you with electronics?

I'm all right.

Maybe after I get these
flowers dropped off,

you could help me with my phone?

What's wrong with your phone?

Well, your number's not in there.

- [gasps] Well, hello there.
- Hello.

Hi. Um, for Bobbi.

- That's me.
- Oh. [chuckles]

Well, flowers for Bobbi.

Oh, I ordered them,
but I'm not the recipient.

[Peter] Bobbi, get in here!

Would you excuse me, please?

Somebody got you flowers?

I got them for you.

Well, Danielle.

Isn't today the anniversary?

[Peter] Oh. Right. Yeah. Cool.

- Who is Danielle?
- Mmm.

When's my next ice bath treatment?

[gasps] Oh, shoot.

Oh, I forgot to schedule it.

[inhales deeply]

I assume this means you also
forgot to refill my HGH prescription?

- [gasps] Ugh.
- Mm-hmm.

[Bobbi] Oh, I'm so sorry. I'll fix it.

Afraid of aging/dying.

[Sophie] Mm-hmm.

Can I make it up to you with some lunch?

Someplace nice, my treat?

No can do. Got an appointment.

Oh.

I didn't see anything on your schedule.

No, it's not business, it's personal.

Who is he?

Or who is she?

Okay.

- Bobbi.
- Hmm?

[gasps]

Thank you.

Miss Unrequited-Crush-On-My-Boss
may just be our way in.

Hey, Parker, see if there's access
through the neighboring office.

Hi, Garrett.

[chuckles] I'm here for the interview.

Interview? With who?

D'oh. Idiot. I forgot the name.

- Lydia?
- Yes. Lydia.

Morning, Gail.

What's up? [pants]

Psst. Do you wanna hear something spooky?

Always.

They're keeping frozen bodies
in the basement.

- What?
- Yeah.

Like some kind of cryonics thing.

I got lost and ended up down there.

Super creepy.

Like, Frankenstein's lab or something.

[pants]

I, uh, gotta use the restroom.

So, uh, if Lydia comes out before
I get back, will you just tell her?

Course. [sighs]

[client] Come on, man.
Don't jerk me around. I need those parts.

[Peter] You'll have them, Tom.
I told you, I've have three clients

who are going to default in two weeks.

- And what if they don't?
- I'll make sure that they do.

Good.

'Cause I got a retired CEO that wants
to take up tennis again and needs tendons.

If you don't believe me, Tom, in two weeks
you're gonna be swimming in tendons.

[both chuckling]

[Peter] You're gonna
be swimming in tendons. [chuckles]

[sighs] You know it's so unfair, Tom.

[sniffs, sighs]

Death is such a sad
and sappy, wasteful event.

Now I've single-handedly monetized
the entire process,

from the moment my client dies,
through their seven years of cold storage,

till I sell their bodies for parts.

And instead of nominating me
for a friggin' Nobel prize,

you wanna know
what my clients' families do, Tom?

Well, they whine and they complain about
me stealing bodies that are lawfully mine.

I mean, the future, Tom,
is the free market.

I guess we know
why he refuses to return the bodies.

He's running a human chop shop.

Not on my bloody watch.

I wanna stop this guy in his tracks,
so we hit him hard and fast.

I'm going to pose as a client
and get him out of his office.

Parker, you're going to get in
and ransack it.

Breanna, you're on digital assets.

Crypto, bank accounts, shell companies.

This creep's wearing a Patek Philippe
watch and designer clothing.

He's got money, and we're gonna find it.

Welcome. Come in.

Hi. [chuckles]

Um.

I am looking for, um... Peter Luna?

Peter's in a meeting right now.
But I can help you. I'm Bobbi.

Oh. [chuckles]

Oh.

I don't mean to pry,
but are you all right?

[Sophie whimpers]

I'm sorry. I, um... I don't even know...
[stutters] ...what I'm doing here.

I know nothing about, um, cryonics.

I, uh... [sighs]
...I just received some very bad news.

Oh, sweetheart.

I'm so sorry.

- [sighs] Can I get you anything?
- Oh.

- Coffee? Water?
- [whimpers]

I'll take the elixir of life
if you have it.

[chuckles]

If we had it, I'd give it to you.

But I can offer you the next best thing.

Three fingers of good whiskey,
that's all right.

[laughs] I was talking about time.

That's what cryonics is about.

It's not sci-fi or make-believe,
or the elixir of life.

It's the process by which
we take back control of the clock.

We?

Oh.

Cryonics is not just my job,
it's my passion.

Are you a client as well?

I'm more than that.

I was the company's first investor.
[chuckles]

How did you get into it?

[inhales sharply]

Many years ago, my boss Peter...
Oh, he's a genius.

Well, he was married to this woman
named Danielle.

She was an ER nurse
who was exposed to hepatitis C

while she was treating a patient.

[sighs] She died ten years ago.

Three months before the cure
was announced.

[sighs]

- If only she'd had a bit more time.
- Yes.

Yes.

She could have lived a long, healthy life.

When I met Peter
and he told me that story...

[inhales deeply] ...I knew that cryonics
was my mission in life.

So much unnecessary suffering
could be avoided

if we could only give people more time.

[sighs]

Peter still hasn't gotten over
losing Danielle.

But, thanks to cryonics, he's got
all the time in the world to do it.

And I'll be waiting when he does...

In a work-related sense.

- Oh.
- And you can have that time too.

- [Peter] Call me tomorrow.
- [Tom] Mm-hmm.

Why, hello.

I see you've met my girl Friday.
Isn't she great?

Why don't you step into my office,
so we can talk turkey.

- [Bobbi chuckles]
- [chuckles]

Now, if you've spent any time at all
researching the cryonics space,

you'll find that our prices are much more
affordable than our competitors.

How do you manage that? [chuckles]

Oh, not gonna lie, it's a struggle.

I've gone without a meal more than once,

but I believe that it is my calling
to democratize cryonics.

The gift of time.

Well, it should be just that. A gift.

Not something sold to the highest bidder.

A future where only wealthy elites
have access to life-extending technology,

that's no future at all.

Cryonics should be
for the everyday folks too.

The moms and pops
who keep our great country running.

Folks like you. And me.

And even Bobbi.

[sighs]

Now, what do I gotta do
to get you into a contract today?

I'm sorry, I... [inhales deeply]
...I don't think I can do this today.

Hey, hey, hey, what's wrong?

Uh, uh, look,
it all sounds wonderful in theory,

but... [stutters] ...I think I should come
back another day, take a look around.

I-I just keep imagining myself
in an ice tray in the back of a freezer.

Oh... [chuckles]

No, I completely understand.

It's not like that.
It's very state of the art.

Matter of fact,

why don't I take you downstairs,
give you a tour right now?

Huh. [sighs]

[Peter] I'm gonna be taking her down
for a tour.

- [elevator dings]
- Gave me a...

Hey! What the hell are you doing?

Don't come back or I'm calling the cops!

Just how secure is this facility?

Uh. You know, I assure you,
th-that's never happened before.

Uh. It's Bobbi's fault.

I will talk to her.

Come on.

[Sophie] Ah.

Is-is-is there a dead body
in each of these?

[Peter] Oh, no, ma'am.

Just temporarily vitrified clients
awaiting reanimation.

They may be legally dead...
[inhales deeply] ...but not to us.

Miss Chang. Looking radiant as ever.

Mr. Anderson. Ooh!

Cold enough for ya? [chuckles]

Oh, so... why do you need an operating room?

Aren't the clients already dead
when they arrive?

It's for when we revive them, of course.

- [shivers]
- [Breanna] Okay.

The only money I can find
with Peter Luna's name on it

is a savings account
with a measly $2,000 in it.

That's not bespoke suit money.
Where's this guy keeping his cash?

[Parker] Not here.

And not cash.

So we're dealing with a guy
who's purposely defrauding clients and--

- I'm gonna have to stop you right there.
- You're about to tell us it's legal again.

- Afraid so.
- 'Merica.

Peter's not defrauding anybody

because he's not falsely representing
what he's doing.

He's just burying it deep in that legalese

so that all the desperate clients
that he targets

don't notice the payment increases or that
they lose the bodies if there's a default.

He's skimming off body parts
like old classic cars.

Exactly. Now, you can't sell blood
or organs for transplant,

but if the cadaver is legally obtained,
you can sell it for, as you say, parts.

Who are the buyers?

Ah. Well, research institutes,
medical schools,

CEOs with tennis...

elbow... It's a lot of people, check it out.

So knees go for about 650 bucks a pop.

A hand, forearm, shoulder combo,
that'll run you 900 bucks.

A spinal column costs about the same.

A heart'll set you back 500 bucks.
Same thing as a kidney.

Corneas, that's actually
in very high demand.

Um, a pair of those go for $6,000.

A brain for 600, add a zero
and you can get the whole...

intact... head.

There's 4,000 tendons in the human body.

And those can cost up to $1,000 a piece.

So, yeah. There's a market.

Well...

Luckily for Gisele and her family... [sighs]

...legal-yet-morally-depraved
is exactly in our wheelhouse.

Hey, Parker. Show them what you found.

Ah. A receipt.
For a currency-to-gold transaction.

Gold? What is this, the Wild West?

All those guys hoard gold.
It's part of the whole libertarian thing.

If civilization goes down,
you got the physical asset.

But the physical assets take up space,

so where's he hiding
this big ol' box of gold?

Well, that's a good question because
I did a deep dive to find Pete's assets.

And while he doesn't keep a whole bunch
of cash on hand,

he holds title to seven properties
in a 50-mile radius,

one of which is 18 acres
of straight-up swamp.

All right, well it's gonna take
us years to search all that.

Oh. Little Miss Bobbi was wearing a
Laura Ashley dress from 1992 and a Timex.

And she didn't seem
to know who Tendon Tom was.

So I'm guessing she's in the dark
about Pete's sick little side hustle.

- And if we could turn her--
- Not so fast.

Breanna.

Okay. Remember those flowers
that Bobbi bought for Peter?

Well, they were actually
for Peter's dead wife's grave.

Yeah. Bobbi's down bad for Peter.

Well, if we try and turn her,
she's just gonna flip more to his side.

[blows raspberry] Okay.

The floor is open for con pitches.

- Flying Dutchman.
- Too messy.

Alligator Alley?

Where are we gonna find a team of oxen
two days before Christmas?

- The Sister Wives?
- Not in this economy.

We could run The Burning Man.

You know, use the bonfires on the levee
for Christmas Eve.

[chains jingle]

We can't Christmas carol him.

Which Christmas carol
are we trying to do again? Huh?

Ooh! Ooh! How about...

♪ Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen ♪

- No, Parker. No.
- ♪ What? ♪

A Christmas Carol.

Like the Dickens story?
You know the one, with the three ghosts.

They meet Ebenezer Scrooge
for Christmas Eve and they...

they... um, show him
the error of his ways and they, um,

convince him to embrace the generosity
of the Christmas spirit all year long.

How do you not know this? Are you...

- Seriously?
- I didn't have parents.

I didn't either,
but there's, like, a ton of books.

- I'm not much of a reader.
- And, like, 11 film adaptations.

- Doesn't ring a bell.
- You know "Good King Wenceslas",

but you do not know A Christmas Carol?

Have to remember, Parker was essentially
feral when we met her.

We can't Christmas Carol him
because we don't do ghosts, okay.

- He's never going to believe in a ghost.
- No, but you don't get it.

You don't get it.

In my plan, Peter is the ghost.

I hate to discourage you,

but this is a guy that uses dead grandpas
to bankrupt single moms.

I'm not sure we're gonna change his heart.
I'm not sure he has a heart.

Well, we don't need to change him.

All we have to do is scare him bad enough,

make him lead us to the gold
hidden somewhere on his property.

Okay, maestro.

Go ahead and say it.

Let's go steal the ghosts of Christmas.

[shock collar crackles]

Bobbi, honey.

Nothing would make me happier
than spending Christmas Eve with you...

- Merry Christmas Eve.
- ...but I'm swamped.

At this rate
I'll be stuck in the office all night.

We'll spend New Year's Eve
together, okay? Gotta go.

Watch it, jerk!

[horn honking]

He's dead.

["Jingle Bells" playing]

Okay. Places, my little choir.
The performance is about to begin.

Time to warm up those voices.

Repeat after me.

You know you need unique New York.
Red jello, rellow jello.

[Eliot] How about just an update on
what's going on in the building?

Sorry, yeah. So we are clear,
except for that Christmas Eve party

at the insurance company
above Luna's office.

Hey, there's Parker's little goth buddy.

[groans]

Massive errors in cranial reassembly.

Entity likely unsuitable
for knowledge work.

[stammers] Where-Where am I?

Who... who-who are you?

[breathes heavily]

[screaming]

[all] Santa! Santa! Santa!

- Damn, Saint Nick, slow down.
- [partygoers clamoring]

Okay, Sophie,
cue the Ghost of Christmas Past.

Hey.

I'm still alive!

[breathes heavily]

You can't freeze me.

Oh!

Uh, you're not being vitrified.
You're being revived.

[Peter] Why is everything so blurry?

That's just your
retinas coming back online.

It can take up to 48 hours.

My retinas?

- [scoffs]
- Hey,

you're that lady
that came by the other day.

[chuckles] The other day?

Oh! [chuckles]

That was 30 years ago.

Well, tragically... [chuckles] ...you died
in a car accident that Christmas Eve.

But I'm not dead.

No, but you were.

[sucks teeth] So was I, actually.

But death can be reversed
and... [inhales sharply]

...they woke me six months ago
when they cured cancer.

[inhales sharply] Now I work
as a reanimation specialist,

which is just a fancy way of saying that
I help others with the reentry process,

such as yourself.

Lady, you're high.

[groans, yells]

Ooh, Mr. Luna.

You must try to calm down.

You're putting an awful lot of pressure on
a heart that hasn't beat in three decades.

There have been many advancements,
but cryonics only works once.

If you die again, it's for keeps.

Prove it. Prove that I died.

[stammers] But I'm worried
about your heart.

Prove it!

Oh, dear.
Well, this will be difficult to see.

[reporter] Horrific crash
caught on camera.

A black Dodge Charger...

[sucks teeth, sighs] It was terrible.

But at least you didn't suffer.

How come I'm not all messed up?

It was a closed head wound.

Left the rest of you largely unscathed.

I'm told it looked
like apple sauce in there.

[chuckles] Isn't science a wonder?

[gasps] Anyway, here's your obituary.

Fair.

I'm afraid this next one
may be a-a smidge distressing.

It appears no one showed up
for your funeral.

Not even Bobbi.

Bobbi?

That gold digger/stage-V clinger?
Yeah, I'm all broken up about it.

Sorry, Father Christmas.
This chimney is shut down.

Yo, Eliot, I got a plastered Sinterklaas
trying to go downstairs.

I just shut down the elevator,
but he's headed to the stairwell.

There's no telling where old Père Noël
is gonna go from there.

I told you. There's too
many moving parts for this con.

There's too many moving parts
in your mouth. [shushes]

Hey, Merry Christmas. [chuckles]

Easy, homey.

- Little too-- Oh! [grunts]
- [grunts]

He's more of a Krampus, I guess.

The Peter Luna.

I can't believe it!

What is it the old people say?

I stan you!

No cap! [laughs]

You know who I am?

Oh, you really have no idea.

[inhales sharply] I'm so sorry.
Where are my manners?

Ashton Mountebank.

The owner of Gift of Time, Incorporated.
Well, the new owner anyway.

My private equity group...
Well, one of my private equity groups

bought your biz
out of bankruptcy last year.

Funny story.

I had actually forgotten
that I had bid in the online auction

until I received the email saying
that I had won! [laughs]

But I didn't go bankrupt.

No, you didn't.

But you did die.

And everyone that came after you
didn't have your genius.

But you're alive now

and, bro, you're gonna be so psyched
to hear how things are now!

Regulations have been slashed.

There are no government agencies.

None. Everything,
and I mean everything, is for sale.

I've got a snow leopard
in my car right now.

Taxes actually go down
the more money you make.

Honestly, I don't know how
we got that last one through Congress.

Of course I'm kidding. I do know.
It was money and lots of it.

[laughs]

Ayo!

But how are you feeling?

Like I died and went to heaven?

[both laughing]

[chokes, coughs]
Hey, pal, can you help me out with this?

- Absolutely.
- [clears throat]

- What do you need, bro? A little tighter?
- No, I need it off!

Oh.

No can do, bro.

I own you.

You-You-You can't own a person.

A hundred percent-o.
Owning a person would be wrong.

But you're not a person.
You're an "F.O.E."

Okay, um, listen to me.
I am not your enemy, I swear--

No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm sorry. Not foe.

F, dot, O, dot, E, dot.

Stands for "Fully Owned Entity."

"Fully Owned Entity"?

Your original idea, which was brilliant,

was to hedge your cryonics business
with a body-brokering sideline.

I have always
been a little bit more interested

in the future labor potential of cryonics.

Basically, why sell a human being in parts

when you can own the whole thing?

And it's all perfectly legal.

Oh, then what am I? A slave?

Oh! Oh. Oh, oh.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Slavery's illegal. Slavery is immoral.

You are an indentured servant.

And when you've worked off your debt,

you're free
to go live your reanimated life.

Well, how long is that gonna take?

The basic formula is twice the amount
of time spent in suspended animation,

- which in your case would be 60 years.
- Sixty years?

But because I'm a fan,
I'll knock it down to 50.

Fifty years?

Life expectancy is twice
what it used to be, so it's more like 25.

[device beeping]

Hold that thought.

Ah! I have to take this.

It's my Supreme Court Justice.

[inhales deeply] Are you double-jointed?

- No.
- Claustrophobic?

Why?

Do you have any experience mining cobalt?

Cobalt?

Don't worry, bro.

We're gonna find you a great job.

Peter Luna.

[laughs] I love my life.

[sighs] God... Hey, Eliot, can you broom
the goths from the stairwell?

They just left that party early

and I don't trust
that little freak Garrett.

[Eliot] I'd love to,
but I'm a little busy right now.

Santa gave me the slip.

Can't you just follow the reindeer tracks?

[growls]

I lifted the master key off the janitor.

I can't believe there are real dead bodies
just a few feet away from us.

You know, I think I may
have underestimated you, Gary.

- It's Garrett.
- I don't care.

[Parker] Why?

Why did I do it? Why, God? [pants]

Hey, you're the interview lady.

Yeah! I snuck back in to look at one
of the bodies and... [gasps]

Oh, God. I don't think they're...

They're not dead! Not really!

I opened one up and it... [stammers]
...it bit me and I don't know...

Help! [shrieks]

[chokes]

- [both gasp]
- Go!

Help me! [groans]

Oh! [grunts]

[sniffs] Hey, um, you gotta help me.

Well, that's what I'm here for.

Yeah. Oh... So, listen,
I'm not really built for, um...

[chuckles] ...manual labor.

Uh, I need you to help me escape.
[breathes heavily]

Oh. I won't do that.
And we should not discuss such things.

Wait a second. Hold on.

But I saved your life,
so I think that you owe me--

Ignore that.

Just the old pipes.

[inhales sharply] It's futile.

You and I are F.O.E.s.

We don't exist outside these walls.

No ID's.

No documents.

[glass squeaking]

No bank accounts.

Well... [stammers] ...we can go to the police.

The police? [inhales sharply]

The police are an subscription service
and F.O.E.s are not eligible.

Hmm.

[mouthing words] Sorry.

The only authority that applies to us
are the retrieval specialists.

Bounty hunters.

They prowl the district,
searching for escaped F.O.E.s.

The minute you break
the perimeter of this building,

they're legally allowed to harvest you.

Harvest? [laughs]

Sell you. In parts. To the highest bidder.

Even if you were, let's say,

to miraculously evade every
retrieval specialist in the district,

you'd still have to find money
to hire a coyote

to show you how to reach the Free Lands.

What am I even saying?
I shouldn't even be speaking about this.

[door opens]

[pants] How's it going in here?

Oh, you know,
just cleared three simultaneous crises

without breaking a sweat, so...

Hold up.

[both] Oh, Bobbi.

[Sophie] You gotta get some self-respect.

[sighs] I'll handle her.

Uh, guys, so I just... I wanted to say
good job on the Santa and the goths.

Just... There's one little complication.

Peter's gone.

[pants, chuckles]

[grunts]

[groans]

Well, well.

A lost lamb.

Leave me alone!

Ah, where's the fun in that?

[pants, stammers] I have... I have a weapon!

Ooh.

I tell you what.

You show me yours,

I'll show you mine.

You see, this knife
is coated in Komodo dragon saliva,

the nastiest bacteria in the world.

One little nick and the poison
is in your bloodstream.

Then you will beg me to harvest you.

Help!

There's no help for F.O.E.s
who break perimeter.

[groans]

[gasps, grunts]

Accompany me if you wish to survive.

And stay down!

This area's crawling
with retrieval specialists.

- Just get in the...
- [stammers]

- Okay.
- [groaning]

Is this the van of the future?
[exhales deeply]

No, and you're damn lucky it's not.

[engine starts]

Hold tight.

[groaning, panting]

Are you a coyote?

- [whimpers]
- [laughs]

We prefer the term resistance fighters.

- Oh!
- [grunts]

[chuckles] But if you're asking if I can
get you out of the district,

the answer is, "Do you have anything
valuable enough to buy your freedom?"

I have money.

[chuckles] As in currency?
'Cause that's not a thing anymore.

[inhales deeply] I have gold.

- [tires screech]
- [Peter groans]

[strains]

Now we're talking.

[crow cawing]

So you've been frozen over 30 years?

That's what they told me.

Damn.

So you died and woke up
in this late-stage capitalist hellscape.

By the way, what did you say
you did before you died?

As a profession.

Uh, I-I was in the nonprofit area.

[sighs] That's so noble.
I knew I liked you.

[Peter grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

For someone in nonprofit,
that's a whole lot of profit.

[pants] What can I say? I'm a saver.

[inhales deeply] Okay.

Well, that's a pretty good hiding place
for your gold,

but, uh, what about Danielle's remains?

[laughs]

That's the genius of it.

There never was a Danielle.

It's a perfect cover story.

Here. Help me load this.

[strains]

[Breanna] Okay.

That should be just enough gold
to get us to the Free Lands.

Speaking of which, this is very important.

Should we be separated for any reason,

you must follow
the fires to the Free Lands.

[inhales sharply] Okay?

Got it.

[grunts, groans]

[tires squeal]

[panting]

The mark is in the wind.

Okay.

[panting]

[Peter] Okay. Okay.

Follow the fires to the Free Lands.
Follow the fires to the Free Lands.

Follow the fires to the...

Aha! [laughs]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Okay. Okay. All right.

Uh, don't harvest me, bro.

Uh, "Vreelands. Vreelands"?

Free Lands?

- [tires squeal]
- [grunts, laughs]

[grunts]

["Jingle Bells" playing]

[breathing heavily]
Did I make it out of the district?

Is this the Free Lands?

Yes!

Yes, yes, yes! Merry...

What is it? Christmas? Merry Christmas!

[laughs]

[sighs, pants]

[laughs] This is... What... [chuckles]

But I mean, didn't-didn't we cure cancer?

Oh, you think
you're gonna get away with this?

Well, I'm going to sue you
into the next millennium.

Okay?

I'm gonna call the cops.

[doorbell dings]

Holy crap! Okay, you gotta help me.

I have been the victim of a crime.
These people...

[stammers] They were right here.

Okay. Uh, so listen, listen.
Okay. So what happened was this.

They told me... they told me that I died
and I came back, and they thawed me,

and it's the future, but I figured it out!

Because we still have cancer!

And then this guy came with a bow...
[crying] ...and he had Komodo dragon saliva.

Is this the guy, ma'am?

[sighs] Yeah. [chuckles] Yeah, that's him.

That's the guy who stole my van.
I think he's unwell.

That's the girl who wants my gold.

I think he means this.

Yeah. Found this in the back of my van.

[laughing]

That's a lie. She's lying.

His pupils are blown.
I think he's on something.

Atropine or ketamine probably.

[chuckles] Seventy-two-hour psych hold?

Works for me.

- All right, pal. Let's go.
- Doesn't work for me--

Ow! Ow!

Oh, God! Oh, God!

Oh, God! [screams]

[sighs] Bobbi!

[sighs] Where were you?

Why didn't you bail me out?

I think my days
of bailing you out are over.

[both] Oh, Bobbi.

I'll handle her.

[Sophie] It appears no one showed up
for your funeral.

- Not even Bobbi.
- [Peter] Bobbi?

That gold digger/stage-V clinger?
Yeah, I'm all broken up about it.

[Peter] There never was a Danielle.
It's a perfect cover story.

[stammers] What are you doing
in my office?

- Closing it.
- You can't do that. It's my company.

It was your company.

I was your first investor, Peter.
Remember?

And I called my note.

You know, the loan I gave you that
you promised to pay back but never did?

I own the company now
and I've decided to sell it off in parts.

Ooh! You know how that works, right?

Bobbi, Bobbi, Bobbi!

I'm gonna... I'm gonna pay you back, um,
as soon as I find my gold.

You mean the profit that you siphoned off
without my knowledge or consent,

then didn't pay taxes on,
yet somehow I'm the gold digger?

Yeah, talk to them about that.

To be honest, I don't even think
they might be your biggest problem.

Apparently, you owe this guy some tendons.

Looks like he's gonna collect those
one way or another.

Bobbi, please. Um...

[sighs] ...you know,
this is bigger than you and me.

The company that I built... That we built...

That we built is vital... [chuckles]
...to the survival of humanity.

Don't talk to me about humanity.

You don't have any.

No moral principles, no high ideals.

Everything you say and do is a lie.

You see people as a bunch of parts
you can extract value from.

You don't cheat death.

You just cheat.

- [sighs]
- You will die someday, Peter.

And I won't be at your funeral.

Ben Kassim Akondro was a wonderful man.

A devoted husband, an amazing dad

and would have been
the world's best grandpa.

But he lived and died
like the banana tree.

So as the family he created,

we now have the honor
of carrying on his legacy.

You coming back to the bar?

We're having
a little Christmas get-together.

Think I'm gonna go see my mom.

This job kind of made me realize
I've got a second chance with her,

thanks to you.

There's never really enough time.
I don't wanna waste it.

Wow.

Merry Christmas, Mr. Wilson.

Miss Devereaux.

Okay. What did I say? What did I say?

I told everyone.

And you were like,
"Even Hardison can't do it."

- I don't sound like that. You are.
- Face it. I'm the latest.

- I'm the greatest.
- You are.

Hardison ain't shi--

- Welcome...
- [Hardison] Mmm.

- ...home, Hardison.
- [Hardison] Mm-hmm.

That's definitely what I was about to say.

- That's what you was about to say?
- Oh, yeah.

That's what you was about...
You sure you weren't gonna say,

"All hail the queen of the con"?

- Ay! Hey.
- Ay!

- I name you...
- Oh.

- ...Breanna of the Christmas Carol...
- Oh.

...first person to successfully
pull off the Carol Con.

And thus, first of her name.

- Can I get a--
- [exclaims]

- Incoming.
- What? What?

- Oh, my back, my back. My back. Ah.
- [shrieks, giggles] Ooh! Ooh.

Um, uh, hey, Sophie,
something came for you.

Oh. What...

It's from Gisele.

It's a banana plant.

- Geez.
- I'm sorry.

[stammers] It's cool,
I'll just... I-I-I'll buy a new back.

[chuckles] I've missed you.
Did you miss me?

Why you asking stupid questions?

[sighing]

[chuckles]

You're thinking about him, aren't you?

Yeah, I am.

You know, after Nate lost his son, Sam,

he believed that
he'd lost his chance at a legacy.

That he was gonna die like the moon.

But he didn't.

Before Nate died, he...
[inhales deeply, sighs]

He sent out lots of little green shoots.

- [chuckles]
- Us.

[Hardison] Not just us.

All the Leverage teams around the world.

Teams that become like...

Families.

Teams that make a difference.

Make a difference to people
that are hurting.

Teams that owe their existence to Nate.

That is Nate's legacy.

Grandma, you have to help me.
I'm so scared.

[Sophie] It's called a Grandparent Scam.

Everybody is an easy mark
if they have the right bait.

They used your daughter
to scam your mother.

That's right. And I wanna know how,
I wanna know why, and I wanna know who.

[Sophie] Donovan Keyes is a pool shark.

And ended up the cellmate
of Nikolai Bravta.

Slovakian criminal alpha, right?

I guess that makes me the inside man.

Let's play a friendly game.

[grunting]

We have a shark to reel in.

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