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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,249 --> 00:00:01,929 Previously on The Big Bang Theory... 2 00:00:01,987 --> 00:00:04,446 We conclusively proved super-asymmetry, 3 00:00:04,534 --> 00:00:07,180 and yet somehow we-we still feel like imposters. 4 00:00:07,278 --> 00:00:09,026 Yeah, there should be a term for that. 5 00:00:09,113 --> 00:00:11,762 Oh, for crying out loud, there is a term for that! 6 00:00:11,849 --> 00:00:13,803 It's called "imposter syndrome," 7 00:00:13,891 --> 00:00:15,942 and you don't have it, because you can't have it 8 00:00:16,030 --> 00:00:18,514 if you are imposters, and you are! 9 00:00:18,616 --> 00:00:21,254 We're the ones who discovered super-asymmetry, 10 00:00:21,342 --> 00:00:23,793 so if anyone's gonna feel like they have imposter syndrome, 11 00:00:23,881 --> 00:00:27,311 it's us because we're not imposters, they are! 12 00:00:27,398 --> 00:00:30,194 You're imposters and you're frauds! 13 00:00:33,047 --> 00:00:35,561 I think what President Siebert is trying to say is that 14 00:00:35,649 --> 00:00:38,170 this is a setback and we should adopt a different strategy. 15 00:00:38,258 --> 00:00:40,807 I-I'm sorry. I-I just... I-I snapped. 16 00:00:40,895 --> 00:00:43,616 Oh, you're sorry. It's all better, then. 17 00:00:44,139 --> 00:00:46,536 Listen up, you have shot to win a Nobel Prize, 18 00:00:46,624 --> 00:00:47,678 and you're blowing it. 19 00:00:47,766 --> 00:00:50,309 I think what President Siebert is trying to say 20 00:00:50,397 --> 00:00:52,350 is that you have a shot to win a Nobel Prize, 21 00:00:52,438 --> 00:00:54,108 and you're blowing it. 22 00:00:56,201 --> 00:00:58,397 Uh, that's exactly what he said. 23 00:00:58,616 --> 00:01:01,851 Yes, but I said it in my calming HR voice. 24 00:01:04,889 --> 00:01:06,967 So, obviously, 25 00:01:07,129 --> 00:01:09,453 I'm really sorry about my outburst. 26 00:01:09,914 --> 00:01:11,874 Calling you frauds was unacceptable. 27 00:01:11,967 --> 00:01:13,381 I feel terrible about it. 28 00:01:13,469 --> 00:01:15,559 It has caused her a lot of stress. 29 00:01:15,647 --> 00:01:16,882 She chewed through her night guard 30 00:01:16,969 --> 00:01:18,788 like it was a piece of jerky. 31 00:01:19,629 --> 00:01:21,420 What you said was really hurtful, 32 00:01:21,508 --> 00:01:23,569 especially because I thought we were friends. 33 00:01:23,787 --> 00:01:25,350 Why would you think that? 34 00:01:26,630 --> 00:01:28,131 Ouch. 35 00:01:29,702 --> 00:01:31,725 Ignore them; they're just mean people. 36 00:01:31,813 --> 00:01:33,983 Uh, not mean, just sorry. 37 00:01:34,071 --> 00:01:36,717 Seem mean, are sorry. Happens all the time. 38 00:01:37,967 --> 00:01:39,809 It's okay. I talked to my therapist, 39 00:01:39,904 --> 00:01:41,631 and she made me realize that what you said 40 00:01:41,719 --> 00:01:44,866 was... really more about your own insecurities. 41 00:01:46,181 --> 00:01:47,756 I'm sorry, what? 42 00:01:48,238 --> 00:01:50,692 There you go, she's sorry. We all heard it. Moving on. 43 00:01:51,629 --> 00:01:52,863 Yes, obviously, 44 00:01:52,950 --> 00:01:54,786 you're angry at all the attention we're getting 45 00:01:54,873 --> 00:01:56,731 for our discovery and you're lashing out. 46 00:01:56,819 --> 00:01:59,535 Well, uh, technically, she lashed out. 47 00:01:59,623 --> 00:02:01,838 I contained myself, which I don't think 48 00:02:01,926 --> 00:02:03,778 I'm getting enough credit for. 49 00:02:04,270 --> 00:02:06,676 The point is we should take it as a compliment 50 00:02:06,764 --> 00:02:10,247 that even you guys think we will win the Nobel Prize. 51 00:02:10,370 --> 00:02:13,604 Uh, no, we-we certainly do not think that. 52 00:02:13,692 --> 00:02:15,052 The Nobel Committee will realize 53 00:02:15,139 --> 00:02:16,326 that we came up with this theory. 54 00:02:16,413 --> 00:02:17,464 But we proved it. 55 00:02:17,552 --> 00:02:18,731 By accident. 56 00:02:18,920 --> 00:02:21,575 All breakthroughs happen by accident. 57 00:02:22,426 --> 00:02:24,012 No, they don't! 58 00:02:25,177 --> 00:02:27,421 Look, the Nobel Committee doesn't like infighting, 59 00:02:27,509 --> 00:02:29,474 so if the four of you don't stop sniping at each other, 60 00:02:29,561 --> 00:02:31,481 the award's gonna go to someone else entirely. 61 00:02:32,379 --> 00:02:33,637 He's right. 62 00:02:33,795 --> 00:02:36,432 You know, like it or not, we can't avoid each other. 63 00:02:36,559 --> 00:02:38,535 Let's at least try to be civil. 64 00:02:38,623 --> 00:02:39,864 Agreed. 65 00:02:40,043 --> 00:02:41,582 You know, when you think about it, 66 00:02:41,732 --> 00:02:44,910 we're linked together the same way that super-asymmetry 67 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,801 links together every atom in the universe. Hmm. 68 00:02:48,465 --> 00:02:50,631 That's not what it does at all! 69 00:02:51,795 --> 00:02:53,848 Well, that's the great thing about science. 70 00:02:53,936 --> 00:02:56,637 We all get to have our own opinions. 71 00:03:02,655 --> 00:03:05,223 I'm still not talking. That's impressive, right? 72 00:03:06,356 --> 00:03:09,872 ♪ Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ♪ 73 00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:13,526 ♪ Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ♪ 74 00:03:13,614 --> 00:03:14,916 ♪ The Earth began to cool ♪ 75 00:03:15,004 --> 00:03:18,112 ♪ The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools ♪ 76 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:20,050 ♪ We built the Wall ♪ ♪ We built the pyramids ♪ 77 00:03:20,137 --> 00:03:22,854 ♪ Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ♪ 78 00:03:22,942 --> 00:03:25,088 ♪ That all started with a big bang ♪ 79 00:03:25,176 --> 00:03:27,059 ♪ Bang! ♪ *THE BIG BANG THEORY* 80 00:03:27,146 --> 00:03:29,146 Season 12 Episode 21 Title: "The Plagiarism Schism" 81 00:03:31,903 --> 00:03:34,598 You... No, no, no, no. Your money's no good here. 82 00:03:38,392 --> 00:03:41,442 Well, I'm glad that we hashed all that out, 83 00:03:41,536 --> 00:03:44,559 and moving forward, may the best team win. 84 00:03:44,793 --> 00:03:46,077 I couldn't agree more. 85 00:03:46,270 --> 00:03:48,098 We're the best team. 86 00:03:48,957 --> 00:03:51,874 Greg Pemberton, you old so-and-so. 87 00:03:52,070 --> 00:03:53,251 Very good to see you. 88 00:03:53,338 --> 00:03:55,720 Uh, let me introduce you to my colleague, Dr. Campbell. 89 00:03:55,807 --> 00:03:57,989 Uh, Kevin, this is Barry Kripke. We went to college together. 90 00:03:58,076 --> 00:04:00,582 Great to meet you. Well, you have my number. 91 00:04:00,670 --> 00:04:02,652 We should hit up the buffet at the strip club 92 00:04:02,740 --> 00:04:04,543 while you're in town. 93 00:04:04,730 --> 00:04:07,510 Nothing beats a lap dance and a baked potato bar, huh? 94 00:04:08,906 --> 00:04:10,385 You can come, too. 95 00:04:10,473 --> 00:04:12,082 That's a hard pass. 96 00:04:12,551 --> 00:04:13,950 I'll walk you out. 97 00:04:14,528 --> 00:04:16,082 Good to see you, Barry. 98 00:04:16,186 --> 00:04:18,207 You're the best! 99 00:04:18,302 --> 00:04:19,903 O- o-oh... 100 00:04:19,996 --> 00:04:21,973 God, I hate that guy. 101 00:04:23,292 --> 00:04:25,567 That's strange; you seem quite fond of him. 102 00:04:25,655 --> 00:04:29,153 I was only being polite. Pemberton is a grade A weasel. 103 00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:31,111 How do I know you're not just being polite 104 00:04:31,198 --> 00:04:32,864 when you say it's nice to see me? 105 00:04:33,254 --> 00:04:36,119 I have literally never said that to you. 106 00:04:37,809 --> 00:04:39,826 Why do you say he's a weasel? 107 00:04:40,396 --> 00:04:41,809 Pemberton's whole M.O. 108 00:04:41,897 --> 00:04:44,680 was to take other people's ideas and turn them in as his own. 109 00:04:44,923 --> 00:04:46,934 That's exactly what he's doing to us. 110 00:04:47,058 --> 00:04:49,841 I'm not surprised. I heard the only work he did on his thesis 111 00:04:49,928 --> 00:04:52,762 was googling, "Where can I buy a thesis?" 112 00:04:53,770 --> 00:04:57,248 Well, plagiarism is a pretty serious charge. Are you sure? 113 00:04:57,489 --> 00:04:59,684 You want proof? I can make some calls. 114 00:04:59,950 --> 00:05:01,450 You'd do that for us? 115 00:05:01,538 --> 00:05:04,521 I really don't want to see that guy win a Nobel. 116 00:05:04,609 --> 00:05:06,736 I also don't want to see you win a Nobel. 117 00:05:06,824 --> 00:05:08,492 Ooh, this is tricky. 118 00:05:10,389 --> 00:05:12,902 I don't know, Barry. It sounds a little sleazy. 119 00:05:13,084 --> 00:05:15,715 Well, let me know if you change your mind. 120 00:05:15,899 --> 00:05:18,504 Sleazy is where I thrive. 121 00:05:22,441 --> 00:05:24,019 So I was talking to my mom 122 00:05:24,107 --> 00:05:26,095 about our Pemberton and Campbell situation. 123 00:05:26,183 --> 00:05:27,293 Really? What'd she say? 124 00:05:27,381 --> 00:05:29,864 Apparently, Old Testament God would bring down his wrath 125 00:05:29,959 --> 00:05:31,308 on them for being deceitful, 126 00:05:31,396 --> 00:05:34,051 but New Testament God would forgive them. 127 00:05:35,685 --> 00:05:38,340 So couldn't we just bring down our wrath 128 00:05:38,428 --> 00:05:40,410 and ask the New Testament God to forgive us? 129 00:05:40,498 --> 00:05:41,564 You know, I asked her 130 00:05:41,652 --> 00:05:42,883 - that very question. - And? 131 00:05:42,971 --> 00:05:45,676 She said I was full of California sass. 132 00:05:46,695 --> 00:05:49,035 Oh, good, you're all here. Uh, we're wrestling 133 00:05:49,123 --> 00:05:51,504 with an ethical question, and perhaps you could help. 134 00:05:51,627 --> 00:05:53,175 - Sure, what's up? - Yeah. - Fire away. 135 00:05:53,332 --> 00:05:55,747 If we have damaging and embarrassing information 136 00:05:55,835 --> 00:05:59,832 about someone, should we keep it to ourselves or expose them? 137 00:06:03,338 --> 00:06:06,033 Quick question: Does it happen to do with online tastes 138 00:06:06,121 --> 00:06:08,796 that might or might not reflect their real-life tastes? 139 00:06:10,043 --> 00:06:12,122 I know all about your tall girl website. 140 00:06:12,210 --> 00:06:13,909 It goes on our credit card. 141 00:06:16,214 --> 00:06:18,249 It's Dr. Pemberton. 142 00:06:18,337 --> 00:06:20,632 Kripke says he plagiarized his thesis, 143 00:06:20,749 --> 00:06:21,968 and that he can prove it. 144 00:06:22,056 --> 00:06:25,233 Wow. Well, that's not gonna sit well with the Nobel Committee. 145 00:06:25,321 --> 00:06:27,437 Hang on. I don't think it's fair to use something 146 00:06:27,525 --> 00:06:29,960 someone did in school against them. 147 00:06:30,124 --> 00:06:32,405 Relax, he said it's not you. 148 00:06:33,757 --> 00:06:35,356 I don't know. If someone's a cheater, 149 00:06:35,444 --> 00:06:37,171 they should be held accountable no matter how long 150 00:06:37,258 --> 00:06:38,309 - ago it was. - Okay, now 151 00:06:38,420 --> 00:06:41,187 you just sound crazy. 152 00:06:42,577 --> 00:06:44,231 So you really think they should do this? 153 00:06:44,319 --> 00:06:46,583 It wouldn't just knock Pemberton 154 00:06:46,671 --> 00:06:49,427 out of Nobel contention, it would blow up his whole career. 155 00:06:49,514 --> 00:06:51,921 To that, I say kaboom! 156 00:06:53,518 --> 00:06:55,414 No, I meant it's a bad thing. 157 00:06:55,502 --> 00:06:57,353 No, no, I agree with Bernadette. 158 00:06:57,447 --> 00:06:58,788 If Pemberton cheated, 159 00:06:58,876 --> 00:07:00,672 maybe he shouldn't have a career in the first place. 160 00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:02,648 There's plenty of people that didn't plagiarize. 161 00:07:02,735 --> 00:07:04,315 And a few of us who did, but it's only 'cause. 162 00:07:04,402 --> 00:07:06,760 The Scarlet Letter was so boring. 163 00:07:08,665 --> 00:07:11,179 Aw, I love The Scarlet Letter. 164 00:07:11,269 --> 00:07:14,283 Th-That's where I got my taste for bad girls. 165 00:07:16,064 --> 00:07:19,307 Ugh, why is this decision so hard? 166 00:07:19,757 --> 00:07:21,635 Maybe because you want to win, 167 00:07:21,723 --> 00:07:24,471 but deep down you know it's not the honorable way to do it. 168 00:07:24,559 --> 00:07:26,275 Otherwise, you would've done it already. 169 00:07:26,392 --> 00:07:27,721 That's really wise. 170 00:07:27,809 --> 00:07:31,143 Yes, but it may just be the Indian accent. 171 00:07:35,726 --> 00:07:38,064 Do you think by not exposing Pemberton 172 00:07:38,196 --> 00:07:39,721 we're doing the right thing? 173 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:41,861 Of course. 174 00:07:42,019 --> 00:07:45,455 Unless you think we're not doing the right thing. 175 00:07:45,549 --> 00:07:47,359 Why would you think that I don't think 176 00:07:47,447 --> 00:07:48,552 we're doing the right thing? 177 00:07:48,639 --> 00:07:52,127 You might think that if good people hold themselves 178 00:07:52,215 --> 00:07:54,130 to unrealistically high ethical standards, 179 00:07:54,218 --> 00:07:57,174 then they might lose out to their unscrupulous competitors. 180 00:07:57,262 --> 00:07:58,343 Is that what you think? 181 00:07:58,431 --> 00:07:59,494 No. 182 00:07:59,582 --> 00:08:01,330 No, I just thought if you thought we weren't 183 00:08:01,418 --> 00:08:04,143 doing the right thing, that's why you might think that. 184 00:08:04,246 --> 00:08:06,428 Well, if I did think that, 185 00:08:06,608 --> 00:08:09,164 you might point out that people who claim 186 00:08:09,252 --> 00:08:11,432 it's okay to do bad things to win 187 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:14,502 are bad people no matter what they tell themselves. 188 00:08:14,971 --> 00:08:16,015 And I'd be right 189 00:08:16,103 --> 00:08:17,181 to point that out. 190 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,049 Because you're a good person. 191 00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:22,572 I love talking to you. 192 00:08:23,135 --> 00:08:26,103 It's like talking to me, but with a girl voice. 193 00:08:29,313 --> 00:08:32,196 I'm just saying, Sheldon and Amy deserve to win, 194 00:08:32,283 --> 00:08:34,432 and sometimes that means doing what you got to do. 195 00:08:34,519 --> 00:08:36,689 Don't you think it's better to take the high road? 196 00:08:36,777 --> 00:08:38,213 Yeah, and instead of guns, 197 00:08:38,301 --> 00:08:41,830 armies should carry candy canes that shoot wishes. 198 00:08:42,939 --> 00:08:44,284 So what's the worst thing you've ever done 199 00:08:44,371 --> 00:08:45,759 to get something you wanted? 200 00:08:45,875 --> 00:08:47,390 I'm not gonna tell you that. 201 00:08:47,492 --> 00:08:49,705 Oh, come on. I'll tell you mine. 202 00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:52,781 Right, 'cause yours is gonna be 203 00:08:52,869 --> 00:08:54,830 as bad as mine. Okay. 204 00:08:56,275 --> 00:08:58,158 Come on, just tell me. 205 00:08:58,463 --> 00:08:59,744 Okay, fine. 206 00:08:59,877 --> 00:09:02,127 When we first met, there was another waitress 207 00:09:02,215 --> 00:09:04,299 at The Cheesecake Factory who thought you were cute, 208 00:09:04,462 --> 00:09:08,588 so I told her you had all the hepatitises, A through Z. 209 00:09:09,068 --> 00:09:11,189 There aren't 26 hepatitises. 210 00:09:11,277 --> 00:09:13,059 Well, if she was smart enough to know that, 211 00:09:13,147 --> 00:09:15,689 she wouldn't still be working at a Cheesecake Factory. 212 00:09:15,936 --> 00:09:17,807 Oh, she still works there? Who was it? 213 00:09:17,895 --> 00:09:19,343 Why does it matter? 214 00:09:19,588 --> 00:09:23,682 You're right, it doesn't... matter 'cause I got the best one. 215 00:09:25,485 --> 00:09:26,789 Was it Susan? 216 00:09:26,877 --> 00:09:28,225 Why? Because she's tall? 217 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:29,947 Good night. 218 00:09:32,306 --> 00:09:33,650 Can't believe it. 219 00:09:33,738 --> 00:09:36,533 Sheldon loves telling on people when they break the rules. 220 00:09:36,647 --> 00:09:38,369 Yeah, well, maybe he's changed. 221 00:09:38,457 --> 00:09:40,730 He hasn't changed. Last week, when the vending machine 222 00:09:40,818 --> 00:09:43,424 gave me two bags of chips, he called my mom. 223 00:09:44,205 --> 00:09:45,760 Well, that didn't ruin your life. 224 00:09:45,848 --> 00:09:47,029 Well, it ruined my day. 225 00:09:47,117 --> 00:09:49,791 I had to talk to my mom, who, by the way, 226 00:09:49,879 --> 00:09:54,143 is-is polyamorous now, so that's fun to think about. 227 00:09:54,846 --> 00:09:56,875 Look, I'm proud of Sheldon and Amy. 228 00:09:56,963 --> 00:09:58,816 You know? They want to win this thing on their own merits, 229 00:09:58,903 --> 00:10:00,463 not by knocking out the competition. 230 00:10:00,551 --> 00:10:02,283 Yeah, but what if they don't win? 231 00:10:02,371 --> 00:10:04,799 Uh, Pemberton and Campbell have done an amazing job 232 00:10:04,893 --> 00:10:06,984 of associating their names with super-asymmetry. 233 00:10:07,072 --> 00:10:08,658 They have all the momentum right now. 234 00:10:08,746 --> 00:10:10,609 I don't like the idea of them losing either, 235 00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:13,064 but this is their decision to make, not ours. 236 00:10:14,619 --> 00:10:16,228 Maybe it is ours. 237 00:10:16,447 --> 00:10:17,635 What do you mean? 238 00:10:17,955 --> 00:10:21,195 Well, I-if Sheldon and Amy don't want to expose Pemberton, 239 00:10:21,283 --> 00:10:23,619 that doesn't mean someone else can't do it for them. 240 00:10:23,713 --> 00:10:25,244 They'd never have to know. 241 00:10:25,439 --> 00:10:26,944 Really? You'd do that? 242 00:10:27,031 --> 00:10:28,568 They deserve the Nobel. 243 00:10:28,656 --> 00:10:30,974 I'm not gonna let two frauds steal it from them. 244 00:10:31,062 --> 00:10:33,609 And if that means getting my hands dirty, so be it. 245 00:10:35,780 --> 00:10:37,187 What's so funny? 246 00:10:37,343 --> 00:10:41,390 Just realized I've never actually seen your hands dirty. 247 00:10:42,980 --> 00:10:45,874 All right, Hofstadter, here's all the proof you need. 248 00:10:45,962 --> 00:10:47,976 - Great, thanks. - Just remember, 249 00:10:48,124 --> 00:10:51,535 once you take this envelope, there's no turning back. 250 00:10:51,906 --> 00:10:54,429 What if I look at it and decide not to use it? 251 00:10:57,803 --> 00:10:59,866 I had not considered that. 252 00:11:00,720 --> 00:11:01,771 Got to hand it to you, 253 00:11:01,859 --> 00:11:04,226 you got a real talent for making things boring. 254 00:11:05,007 --> 00:11:05,916 Thanks. 255 00:11:06,003 --> 00:11:08,137 Hey, look at that, you did it again. 256 00:11:10,274 --> 00:11:11,234 Hi, Leonard. 257 00:11:11,322 --> 00:11:12,937 What? Nothing. 258 00:11:14,171 --> 00:11:15,171 You okay? 259 00:11:15,290 --> 00:11:17,023 Uh, no, you are. 260 00:11:22,796 --> 00:11:25,398 So guess what. There was a waitress 261 00:11:25,486 --> 00:11:27,622 at The Cheesecake Factory back in the day 262 00:11:27,710 --> 00:11:29,539 who kind of had a thing for me. 263 00:11:29,749 --> 00:11:33,093 Other than Bernadette? That does not sound right. 264 00:11:33,476 --> 00:11:34,546 Honest to God. 265 00:11:34,634 --> 00:11:35,813 Oh, well, who was it? 266 00:11:35,901 --> 00:11:37,389 It doesn't even matter. I'm happily married. 267 00:11:37,476 --> 00:11:41,219 The point is women... plural... Find me appealing. 268 00:11:41,415 --> 00:11:43,764 Okay. Okay, well, well, let's see. 269 00:11:43,852 --> 00:11:45,689 Okay? We-we know it wasn't Penny, 270 00:11:45,776 --> 00:11:47,938 we know it wasn't Susan... Wait. 271 00:11:48,026 --> 00:11:49,341 How do we know it wasn't Susan? 272 00:11:49,429 --> 00:11:51,110 Uh, because she had a type. 273 00:11:51,198 --> 00:11:52,379 What type? 274 00:11:52,876 --> 00:11:54,587 Don't make me say it. 275 00:11:55,946 --> 00:11:58,301 Are you saying I'm not a handsome guy? 276 00:11:58,571 --> 00:12:00,805 See? It's mean, right? 277 00:12:04,094 --> 00:12:05,639 Hold on, as we've established, 278 00:12:05,727 --> 00:12:07,790 a minimum of two women think I'm attractive. 279 00:12:07,878 --> 00:12:10,821 Uh, yeah, you're right, it was totally Susan. 280 00:12:12,094 --> 00:12:14,311 I didn't say it was her. I said it could've been. 281 00:12:14,399 --> 00:12:17,118 It could've been anybody. Marta, Gina, Annalise... 282 00:12:17,206 --> 00:12:20,126 It's a little creepy that you remember all their names. 283 00:12:21,149 --> 00:12:22,881 Not just their names. 284 00:12:22,969 --> 00:12:24,625 The cars they drove, the color of their eyes, 285 00:12:24,712 --> 00:12:26,907 and whether or not they had boyfriends. 286 00:12:29,485 --> 00:12:31,600 Your husband was acting kind of weird today. 287 00:12:31,688 --> 00:12:34,337 You sure you're not thinking about your husband? 288 00:12:35,025 --> 00:12:37,574 No. He was acting all sketchy. 289 00:12:37,735 --> 00:12:39,409 Almost like he was guilty or something. 290 00:12:39,496 --> 00:12:41,061 Oh. Well, that doesn't mean anything. 291 00:12:41,149 --> 00:12:43,602 I mean, Leonard has resting guilt face. 292 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,992 Yeah, it's-it's like, "What are you guilty about, Leonard?" 293 00:12:46,079 --> 00:12:48,239 "Nothing." "Well, then, tell it to your face." 294 00:12:49,610 --> 00:12:50,620 Are you okay? 295 00:12:50,707 --> 00:12:52,259 I'm so okay, yeah. 296 00:12:52,509 --> 00:12:54,712 Then why are you acting guilty now? 297 00:12:55,751 --> 00:12:57,688 Okay, look, Leonard knows 298 00:12:57,776 --> 00:12:59,805 that you and Sheldon decided to take the high road, 299 00:12:59,893 --> 00:13:01,259 so he went to Kripke for you. 300 00:13:01,347 --> 00:13:03,462 But that just means you didn't do anything wrong, 301 00:13:03,550 --> 00:13:05,555 and now you don't risk losing to those idiots. 302 00:13:05,727 --> 00:13:07,270 Why did you tell me? 303 00:13:07,357 --> 00:13:09,559 Now that I know, I'm implicated. 304 00:13:09,647 --> 00:13:11,057 But you wanted me to. 305 00:13:11,145 --> 00:13:13,135 I also wanted you to be my jester 306 00:13:13,223 --> 00:13:15,700 at the Renaissance Fair, but that didn't happen. 307 00:13:16,254 --> 00:13:17,903 I wanted to be a princess. 308 00:13:17,991 --> 00:13:20,676 There was only one princess, and it was me! 309 00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:24,621 Fine. I'm sorry I told you. 310 00:13:24,872 --> 00:13:26,332 And I forgive you. 311 00:13:26,676 --> 00:13:28,957 'Cause that's what a princess would do. 312 00:13:30,981 --> 00:13:32,962 Kudos on the meatballs. 313 00:13:33,049 --> 00:13:35,129 They're nice and round. 314 00:13:36,630 --> 00:13:38,077 Thanks. Yeah. 315 00:13:38,321 --> 00:13:40,236 They're much better than those prolate spheroids 316 00:13:40,323 --> 00:13:42,455 you used to pass off as balls. 317 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:44,474 Okay. 318 00:13:45,166 --> 00:13:47,197 Are you all right? You seem distracted. 319 00:13:47,285 --> 00:13:50,674 Yeah, sorry. I'm just trying to figure something out. 320 00:13:50,887 --> 00:13:52,846 Is it what to get me for our anniversary? 321 00:13:52,936 --> 00:13:54,773 'Cause I'll give you a hint: it's already 322 00:13:54,861 --> 00:13:57,611 in my Amazon basket. Just click "buy now." 323 00:13:58,952 --> 00:14:00,589 I filled out the gift card for you. 324 00:14:00,677 --> 00:14:02,604 Apparently, I'm the light of your life. 325 00:14:04,307 --> 00:14:07,664 Sheldon, if someone were gonna do something 326 00:14:07,854 --> 00:14:10,080 ethically murky on your behalf, 327 00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:11,735 would you rather know about it 328 00:14:11,822 --> 00:14:15,408 or not know about it to retain your innocence? 329 00:14:15,924 --> 00:14:19,175 Well, now that I know there's a thing to know, I have to know. 330 00:14:19,262 --> 00:14:21,565 Can't help myself; I'm a fact addict. 331 00:14:21,736 --> 00:14:23,384 That's not a real thing. 332 00:14:23,667 --> 00:14:25,627 And that's a fact. 333 00:14:27,711 --> 00:14:30,057 Leonard, I know what you're planning to do, 334 00:14:30,145 --> 00:14:31,502 and I said I didn't want to do it. 335 00:14:31,590 --> 00:14:32,855 What? You told him? 336 00:14:32,943 --> 00:14:34,290 Well, you told me. 337 00:14:34,377 --> 00:14:36,729 Yeah, that's-that's probably where you heard it. 338 00:14:37,821 --> 00:14:39,628 You're not doing anything wrong. 339 00:14:39,716 --> 00:14:41,205 That's the point. I'm doing it. 340 00:14:41,293 --> 00:14:43,008 Yeah, but it's still wrong. 341 00:14:43,096 --> 00:14:45,023 Well, so is you and Amy not getting 342 00:14:45,111 --> 00:14:46,666 the recognition for your discovery. 343 00:14:46,783 --> 00:14:48,611 And if that means I have to do something shady 344 00:14:48,712 --> 00:14:50,807 so you don't have to, I'm okay with that. 345 00:14:50,894 --> 00:14:52,342 But we're not. 346 00:14:52,572 --> 00:14:54,916 I mean, it's sweet that you want to help, but we don't want you 347 00:14:55,003 --> 00:14:57,084 compromising your integrity for us. 348 00:14:57,203 --> 00:14:59,283 Wait, what... really? 349 00:15:00,134 --> 00:15:02,447 I thought we were just worried about looking bad. 350 00:15:02,837 --> 00:15:04,387 It could be both. 351 00:15:04,789 --> 00:15:06,236 Okay. 352 00:15:06,368 --> 00:15:09,210 But I'm gonna go with my reason. Yours is too complicated. 353 00:15:12,955 --> 00:15:14,030 Hey. 354 00:15:14,118 --> 00:15:15,332 Hey. 355 00:15:15,962 --> 00:15:19,361 Listen, I did something kind of... stupid today. 356 00:15:19,728 --> 00:15:21,437 Okay. 357 00:15:21,892 --> 00:15:23,405 I went to The Cheesecake Factory 358 00:15:23,493 --> 00:15:26,476 to try to figure out who that waitress was. 359 00:15:26,563 --> 00:15:28,010 - Howie. - Don't worry, I didn't find out, 360 00:15:28,097 --> 00:15:31,472 because I realized I didn't even care. 361 00:15:31,667 --> 00:15:33,847 W-While I was there, I started asking myself, 362 00:15:33,935 --> 00:15:35,918 "Why does this mean anything to me?" 363 00:15:36,006 --> 00:15:42,034 And... I guess the truth is it was all about my vanity. 364 00:15:42,706 --> 00:15:45,743 And why should I need to be validated by another woman 365 00:15:45,831 --> 00:15:50,401 liking me when the best woman in the world already loves me? 366 00:15:52,729 --> 00:15:54,671 And I just wanted you to know that. 367 00:15:56,589 --> 00:15:58,274 The restaurant manager already called. 368 00:15:58,362 --> 00:16:00,354 You really creeped a lot of people out. 369 00:16:02,151 --> 00:16:04,463 And I regret that. 370 00:16:05,068 --> 00:16:07,807 Because the only woman I want to creep out 371 00:16:07,895 --> 00:16:10,120 is the... mother of my children. 372 00:16:12,362 --> 00:16:14,557 Well, you're off to a good start. 373 00:16:19,276 --> 00:16:20,782 Thank you for meeting us. 374 00:16:20,870 --> 00:16:22,329 No problem. We never say no 375 00:16:22,417 --> 00:16:23,985 when someone wants to buy us lunch. 376 00:16:24,073 --> 00:16:26,089 We didn't say we were going to buy you lunch. 377 00:16:26,177 --> 00:16:28,516 Really? Apologies go down easier 378 00:16:28,604 --> 00:16:30,495 with free turkey club sandwiches. 379 00:16:32,128 --> 00:16:34,696 This isn't another apology. 380 00:16:34,784 --> 00:16:36,502 There's something we have to give you. 381 00:16:36,590 --> 00:16:37,432 Yes. 382 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:42,017 Uh, we have proof that you plagiarized your thesis. 383 00:16:42,105 --> 00:16:44,560 It's why we invited you to this lunch. 384 00:16:44,731 --> 00:16:46,136 We invited them. 385 00:16:46,224 --> 00:16:48,745 That's the confusion over who's paying. 386 00:16:49,139 --> 00:16:51,472 Hold on, are you blackmailing us? 387 00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:53,472 No, the opposite. 388 00:16:54,487 --> 00:16:56,456 We're blackmailing you? 389 00:16:59,714 --> 00:17:01,628 How are you up for a Nobel?! 390 00:17:02,549 --> 00:17:04,001 We're giving you this 391 00:17:04,089 --> 00:17:05,985 so that no one can use it against you, 392 00:17:06,073 --> 00:17:08,548 because we want to win on our own merits, 393 00:17:08,636 --> 00:17:10,179 not by tearing you down. 394 00:17:10,266 --> 00:17:12,198 So it's true? You really did this? 395 00:17:12,286 --> 00:17:14,009 It was years ago, and I was going through 396 00:17:14,097 --> 00:17:15,852 - a very hard time. - What hard time? 397 00:17:15,939 --> 00:17:19,268 I had to write a thesis, and I wasn't smart enough to do it. 398 00:17:21,044 --> 00:17:23,563 You realize my name is attached to yours. 399 00:17:23,651 --> 00:17:25,423 If this gets out, it ruins me, too. 400 00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:26,981 It's not gonna get out. 401 00:17:27,176 --> 00:17:28,348 You know what? Linda was right. 402 00:17:28,435 --> 00:17:30,315 You're always looking for shortcuts. 403 00:17:30,792 --> 00:17:32,807 When did you talk to my ex-wife? 404 00:17:32,895 --> 00:17:34,119 She's not your ex-wife. 405 00:17:34,207 --> 00:17:35,954 You keep dragging your feet on those papers. 406 00:17:36,042 --> 00:17:38,474 Well, I'm trying to get the lake house. 407 00:17:38,768 --> 00:17:40,266 You're not getting the lake house. 408 00:17:40,354 --> 00:17:41,500 You're never getting the lake house. 409 00:17:41,588 --> 00:17:43,284 She picked it out, she decorated it. 410 00:17:43,386 --> 00:17:44,781 The lake house is hers. 411 00:17:45,134 --> 00:17:47,026 What is going on here? 412 00:17:47,237 --> 00:17:49,159 I'm in love with Linda! 413 00:17:51,557 --> 00:17:54,347 You son of a bitch! 414 00:18:03,042 --> 00:18:05,331 That was my iced tea. 415 00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:11,643 Dr. Cooper, Dr. Fowler. 416 00:18:11,731 --> 00:18:13,682 Just the guy I want to see. 417 00:18:15,112 --> 00:18:16,229 Are you drunk? 418 00:18:16,324 --> 00:18:19,271 I was, and then I still was. 419 00:18:19,359 --> 00:18:22,075 And now, I still was. 420 00:18:23,222 --> 00:18:24,597 Okay, can we help you? 421 00:18:24,685 --> 00:18:26,567 Pemberton is out. 422 00:18:26,687 --> 00:18:28,837 Someone published all the information 423 00:18:28,925 --> 00:18:30,266 about his plagiarism. 424 00:18:30,354 --> 00:18:31,995 It was me. 425 00:18:32,427 --> 00:18:36,196 Someone else told Fermilab, and he lost his job. 426 00:18:36,284 --> 00:18:37,847 Also me. 427 00:18:38,033 --> 00:18:39,064 And someone is 428 00:18:39,152 --> 00:18:42,846 sleeping with his ex-wife and it's not me. 429 00:18:43,651 --> 00:18:45,206 I thought it was. 430 00:18:45,329 --> 00:18:47,926 Not anymore. Apparently, just because I'm better 431 00:18:48,014 --> 00:18:51,381 than her husband doesn't mean I'm as good as her contractor. 432 00:18:52,442 --> 00:18:54,123 Women, huh? 433 00:18:54,543 --> 00:18:56,244 I-I think you need to go. 434 00:18:56,332 --> 00:18:57,775 No, wait. Hear me out. 435 00:18:57,863 --> 00:19:00,227 Look, the three of us could team up. 436 00:19:00,315 --> 00:19:01,814 There's one small catch. 437 00:19:01,916 --> 00:19:03,180 Dr. Pemberton has been saying 438 00:19:03,268 --> 00:19:04,694 a lot of bad stuff about me. 439 00:19:04,781 --> 00:19:07,586 But don't worry, I couldn't possibly have done any of it, 440 00:19:07,674 --> 00:19:09,744 because I was with you guys the whole time. 441 00:19:09,877 --> 00:19:11,369 I did it. 442 00:19:14,584 --> 00:19:16,046 Frankly, I don't know what Linda 443 00:19:16,197 --> 00:19:17,939 ever saw in either of them. 444 00:19:18,026 --> 00:19:20,026 Sync corrections by srjanapala 33854

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