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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,203 --> 00:00:05,030 ♪ It seems today that all you see ♪ 2 00:00:05,031 --> 00:00:08,168 ♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪ 3 00:00:08,169 --> 00:00:11,938 ♪ But where are those good old-fashioned values ♪ 4 00:00:11,939 --> 00:00:14,941 ♪ On which we used to rely? ♪ 5 00:00:14,942 --> 00:00:18,219 ♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪ 6 00:00:18,220 --> 00:00:21,624 ♪ Lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪ 7 00:00:21,625 --> 00:00:23,287 ♪ All the things that make us ♪ 8 00:00:23,288 --> 00:00:25,018 ♪ Laugh and cry ♪ 9 00:00:25,019 --> 00:00:30,201 ♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪ 10 00:00:30,202 --> 00:00:33,962 - Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT - - www.addic7ed.com - 11 00:00:34,990 --> 00:00:37,676 I tell you, Sundays are the best, aren't they? 12 00:00:37,677 --> 00:00:39,515 You said it, chief. 13 00:00:39,516 --> 00:00:40,917 Hey, Chris, what's the name of the girl 14 00:00:40,918 --> 00:00:43,387 on the end of the couch? I'm sure I've met her before. 15 00:00:43,388 --> 00:00:45,689 I'll introduce myself to her. That'll get her to say it. 16 00:00:45,690 --> 00:00:48,859 (CLEARS THROAT) Hi. I'm Chris. 17 00:00:48,860 --> 00:00:50,460 Hi, Chris. 18 00:00:50,461 --> 00:00:52,395 Well, that didn't work. 19 00:00:52,396 --> 00:00:54,398 ANNOUNCER (OVER TV): This Sunday at the Quahog Convention Center, 20 00:00:54,399 --> 00:00:56,466 it's Streaming-Con. 21 00:00:56,467 --> 00:00:58,601 All your favorite YouTubers, Instagrammers, 22 00:00:58,602 --> 00:01:02,839 social media mavens and digital influencers under one roof. 23 00:01:02,840 --> 00:01:05,708 Social media? Better swap my glasses for a monocle 24 00:01:05,709 --> 00:01:08,912 that will pop out when I'm confronted with modern talk. 25 00:01:08,913 --> 00:01:12,416 LOL at thousands of the hottest Vimeos, memes, 26 00:01:12,417 --> 00:01:14,717 - epic fails. - Heavens! 27 00:01:14,718 --> 00:01:18,422 Meet disgraced YouTube star Logan Paul and his cool bus, 28 00:01:18,423 --> 00:01:19,889 the Golden Throated Homeless Guy 29 00:01:19,890 --> 00:01:21,892 and his cool bus he poops in, 30 00:01:21,893 --> 00:01:23,693 - Newly Sober Cat... - (CAT MEWS) 31 00:01:23,694 --> 00:01:25,529 - formerly Grumpy Cat... - (CAT GROANS) 32 00:01:25,530 --> 00:01:27,997 - and teen influencers Tyler Oakley... - Who? 33 00:01:27,998 --> 00:01:29,565 - Lele Pons... - What? 34 00:01:29,566 --> 00:01:30,833 - GloZell... - Where? 35 00:01:30,834 --> 00:01:32,568 - Joey Graceffa! - When? 36 00:01:32,569 --> 00:01:34,637 - Sunday. I already said that. - Oh, I'm so embarrassed. 37 00:01:34,638 --> 00:01:36,639 With special guest star, everyone's favorite 38 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:40,344 Internet how-to whiz, Corey from Corey's World. 39 00:01:40,345 --> 00:01:43,046 What's going on, guys? I'm Corey from Corey's World. 40 00:01:43,047 --> 00:01:44,780 And I'm gonna be live and in-person 41 00:01:44,781 --> 00:01:46,083 at the Quahog Streaming-Con, 42 00:01:46,084 --> 00:01:48,418 where you'll see I'm only five-foot-two. 43 00:01:48,419 --> 00:01:50,654 And remember, that Nazi stuff I said was in the heat 44 00:01:50,655 --> 00:01:52,522 of a very competitive Halo game. 45 00:01:52,523 --> 00:01:54,790 And congratulations to Goldblatt69, 46 00:01:54,791 --> 00:01:56,860 whose people definitely do not control the media 47 00:01:56,861 --> 00:01:58,729 and all banking. 48 00:01:58,730 --> 00:02:00,831 Dad, can we go to Streaming-Con? 49 00:02:00,832 --> 00:02:02,565 Well, I wasn't watching all that closely. 50 00:02:02,566 --> 00:02:03,999 Is it like a rodeo? 51 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:05,701 Um, sure. 52 00:02:05,702 --> 00:02:07,938 We're going to Streaming-Con! Giddyup! 53 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:12,676 Looks like someone's going to Streaming-Con. 54 00:02:12,677 --> 00:02:14,679 Rope a doggy for me. 55 00:02:22,619 --> 00:02:24,887 Oh, awesome. Look over there. You can take a selfie 56 00:02:24,888 --> 00:02:27,892 in a hospital bed to get social media attention. 57 00:02:30,727 --> 00:02:33,598 "Don't really want to get into it, but I'm fine." 58 00:02:34,699 --> 00:02:35,966 (RAPID CHIMING) 59 00:02:35,967 --> 00:02:39,404 Oh, boy. Well, this is the last thing I wanted. 60 00:02:43,607 --> 00:02:46,877 I'm gonna do a Instagram story here where I insult a loner 61 00:02:46,878 --> 00:02:49,512 and it becomes a whole thing. 62 00:02:49,513 --> 00:02:53,784 What's up, everybody? I'm here at Streaming-Con 2019. 63 00:02:53,785 --> 00:02:56,520 Weird ponytail. 64 00:02:56,521 --> 00:02:58,722 They got a whole booth of cat GIFs here. 65 00:02:58,723 --> 00:03:00,456 Jiff? 66 00:03:00,457 --> 00:03:03,460 How-how do you say... Uh-oh. 67 00:03:03,461 --> 00:03:05,662 Hey, man, I didn't say anything to that guy. 68 00:03:05,663 --> 00:03:07,998 This is ridiculous. You're hurting my wrist! 69 00:03:07,999 --> 00:03:11,468 So check this out, guys. I got kicked out of Streaming-Con 2019. 70 00:03:11,469 --> 00:03:13,603 Now, I don't know if anyone watching this is a lawyer, 71 00:03:13,604 --> 00:03:15,639 especially a constitutional lawyer, 72 00:03:15,640 --> 00:03:16,706 - but... - (KNOCKING ON WINDOW) 73 00:03:16,707 --> 00:03:18,008 Hey. 74 00:03:18,009 --> 00:03:20,444 Hey, guys, so I'm in my own trunk. 75 00:03:20,445 --> 00:03:21,978 Uh, I think I'm gonna get murdered. 76 00:03:21,979 --> 00:03:23,612 Uh, but before I do, I forgot, 77 00:03:23,613 --> 00:03:25,081 I'm supposed to mention Triscuits. 78 00:03:25,082 --> 00:03:26,682 Really, all the Nabisco products, 79 00:03:26,683 --> 00:03:27,818 they're-they're solid. 80 00:03:27,819 --> 00:03:29,218 You know, like, on the back of Triscuits 81 00:03:29,219 --> 00:03:31,053 when they give you the recipes for those snacks? 82 00:03:31,054 --> 00:03:32,622 Like, the-the mini pizzas? 83 00:03:32,623 --> 00:03:34,758 I swear to God, make those little pizzas. 84 00:03:34,759 --> 00:03:37,093 Hashtag it: #PetesTriscuitLifeHacks. 85 00:03:37,094 --> 00:03:38,829 Go ahead and check it out. Recipe in bio. 86 00:03:38,830 --> 00:03:39,831 - (TIRES SCREECH) - Whoa! 87 00:03:45,069 --> 00:03:47,069 (PANTING): I got away. 88 00:03:47,070 --> 00:03:50,773 Hey, guys, I'm in an Uber, heading back to Streaming-Con. 89 00:03:50,774 --> 00:03:52,778 Uh, man bun alert. 90 00:03:57,648 --> 00:04:00,784 ANNOUNCER: Now seating for Corey: The Live Experience. 91 00:04:00,785 --> 00:04:02,786 All religions welcome. 92 00:04:02,787 --> 00:04:04,787 That's us! Come on, everyone! 93 00:04:04,788 --> 00:04:05,988 Hey, where's Brian? 94 00:04:05,989 --> 00:04:08,924 Hey, you know how Snapchat puts a fake dog tongue on you? 95 00:04:08,925 --> 00:04:11,195 - How'd you like a real one? - (BOTH GASP) 96 00:04:12,864 --> 00:04:15,765 - That was bad. - Eh, times have changed. 97 00:04:15,766 --> 00:04:17,801 Three years ago, I would've been a hero. 98 00:04:17,802 --> 00:04:19,635 Three years ago, they would've been 12. 99 00:04:19,636 --> 00:04:21,037 I need a nap. 100 00:04:21,038 --> 00:04:23,539 Brian, turn on the heat and NPR. 101 00:04:23,540 --> 00:04:26,642 RADIO HOST: We now return to NPR's Fresh Air. 102 00:04:26,643 --> 00:04:29,212 TERRY GROSS: My guest today is a white music writer 103 00:04:29,213 --> 00:04:32,214 who has written a book about the history of hip-hop. 104 00:04:32,215 --> 00:04:34,217 - (SNORING) - Stewie's loss. 105 00:04:34,218 --> 00:04:36,520 I'm sure this'll be an enriching discussion. 106 00:04:36,521 --> 00:04:40,222 Hip-hop has its roots in the call-and-response tradition 107 00:04:40,223 --> 00:04:42,758 of the Southern black Baptist church. 108 00:04:42,759 --> 00:04:44,126 (SNORING) 109 00:04:44,127 --> 00:04:47,162 (TIRES SCREECH) 110 00:04:50,567 --> 00:04:52,102 (TIRES SCREECH) 111 00:04:54,237 --> 00:04:56,238 (YAWNS) 112 00:04:56,239 --> 00:04:58,642 Well, a nap was just what the doctor ordered. 113 00:04:58,643 --> 00:05:00,440 - I feel like a new... - And, of course, you can't 114 00:05:00,441 --> 00:05:01,912 write a history of rap 115 00:05:01,913 --> 00:05:04,179 without mentioning Gil Scott-Heron... 116 00:05:04,180 --> 00:05:06,082 (BOTH SNORING) 117 00:05:06,083 --> 00:05:08,084 (CROWD CHEERING, DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) 118 00:05:08,085 --> 00:05:09,585 (CAMERAS CLICKING) 119 00:05:09,586 --> 00:05:10,953 What's going on, guys? 120 00:05:10,954 --> 00:05:12,923 I'm Corey from Corey's World. 121 00:05:12,924 --> 00:05:15,125 And today, I'm gonna show you how anyone can become 122 00:05:15,126 --> 00:05:18,928 an Internet celebrity, like me, Corey from Corey's World. 123 00:05:18,929 --> 00:05:22,332 I bet you can't make my daughter Meg an Internet celebrity. 124 00:05:22,333 --> 00:05:23,866 Dad, stop. 125 00:05:23,867 --> 00:05:26,236 No, stand up, young lady. 126 00:05:26,237 --> 00:05:29,104 Rectangle body, fridge bod, untapped market. 127 00:05:29,105 --> 00:05:30,573 Go with that. 128 00:05:30,574 --> 00:05:32,609 Everybody, hashtag #FridgeBodMeg. 129 00:05:32,610 --> 00:05:34,144 (CHUCKLES) You're welcome. 130 00:05:34,145 --> 00:05:36,145 - (PHONE VIBRATES) - (GASPS) Oh, my God, Dad! 131 00:05:36,146 --> 00:05:37,880 I'm trending on Twitter. 132 00:05:37,881 --> 00:05:39,149 That's awesome, Meg. 133 00:05:39,150 --> 00:05:42,284 I say we celebrate by eating Triscuit pizzas. 134 00:05:42,285 --> 00:05:44,654 - Is it good? - The recipe's right on the box. 135 00:05:44,655 --> 00:05:46,690 - Yeah, but is it good? - You can make them 136 00:05:46,691 --> 00:05:49,024 with ingredients you probably already have in the house. 137 00:05:49,025 --> 00:05:51,659 - Dad, what does it taste like? - That's right. 138 00:05:52,597 --> 00:05:55,632 Ugh! It's like I dropped a tomato in some hay. 139 00:05:55,633 --> 00:05:58,101 Yeah, it's like if a horse made a pizza. 140 00:05:58,102 --> 00:06:01,239 Triscuits: make sure you have a drink nearby. 141 00:06:06,910 --> 00:06:08,912 All right, Meg, now that you're an Internet personality, 142 00:06:08,913 --> 00:06:10,313 we got to build your brand. 143 00:06:10,314 --> 00:06:11,914 Is there anything you can do? 144 00:06:11,915 --> 00:06:13,649 Uh, yeah, actually, I can... 145 00:06:13,650 --> 00:06:17,354 (BLEEP) 146 00:06:17,355 --> 00:06:19,888 (EXHALES): I-Is... 147 00:06:19,889 --> 00:06:22,726 Is there anything you can do in front of your dad? 148 00:06:22,727 --> 00:06:24,794 - I can shuffle a deck of cards. - Oh, good. 149 00:06:24,795 --> 00:06:25,928 With my... 150 00:06:25,929 --> 00:06:28,664 (BLEEP) 151 00:06:28,665 --> 00:06:31,534 All right, we're taking your bedroom door off the hinges. 152 00:06:34,237 --> 00:06:36,739 Is the lady who owns the Prius here? 153 00:06:36,740 --> 00:06:39,743 - Uh, actually, that's me. - Oh, well, your wife's car is totaled. 154 00:06:39,744 --> 00:06:41,378 - It's my car. - Sorry. 155 00:06:41,379 --> 00:06:43,880 We were, however, able to save your purse. 156 00:06:43,881 --> 00:06:46,061 It's a gender-fluid Euro carrier. 157 00:06:46,062 --> 00:06:48,751 Either way, we'll have it towed back to San Francisco. 158 00:06:48,752 --> 00:06:51,221 Hey, there are plenty of closer gay cities, you big ape. 159 00:06:51,222 --> 00:06:52,955 How did this turn into my fight? 160 00:06:52,956 --> 00:06:54,224 You're gonna need a loaner. 161 00:06:54,225 --> 00:06:57,060 We have a pink Volkswagen Beetle you might feel comfortable in. 162 00:06:57,061 --> 00:06:59,361 (GASPS) Ooh, Brian, we could be two in the pink! 163 00:06:59,362 --> 00:07:00,929 Take that one! Take that one! 164 00:07:00,930 --> 00:07:02,364 Yeah, I'm thinking of something sportier. 165 00:07:02,365 --> 00:07:05,368 - The red Miata it is. - Give me your manliest car! 166 00:07:05,369 --> 00:07:06,969 Bill, I need a Hummer. 167 00:07:06,970 --> 00:07:09,238 BILL: Again? You're insatiable. 168 00:07:09,239 --> 00:07:10,839 Wise guy. 169 00:07:10,840 --> 00:07:12,843 (ENGINE RUMBLING) 170 00:07:30,828 --> 00:07:33,697 - (BRAKES SQUEAK) - Wow, that thing's big. 171 00:07:33,698 --> 00:07:35,231 Brian, it's night now. 172 00:07:35,232 --> 00:07:37,335 (INSECTS CHIRPING) 173 00:07:41,439 --> 00:07:44,407 What's up? This is Refrigerator Meg. 174 00:07:44,408 --> 00:07:47,310 Thought I'd give you a tour of my refrigerator lifestyle. 175 00:07:47,311 --> 00:07:49,212 Let's see what we've got in here. 176 00:07:49,213 --> 00:07:52,282 Ooh, check, check, check it out! 177 00:07:52,283 --> 00:07:54,017 Boom! Mini cream! 178 00:07:54,018 --> 00:07:56,419 Oh, and what's this? Strawberry yogurt? 179 00:07:56,420 --> 00:07:58,854 Is-is your girl Meg some kind of health nut? 180 00:07:58,855 --> 00:08:02,694 No, turn it around: 35 grams of sugar! 181 00:08:04,494 --> 00:08:06,361 Yeah, through the roof! 182 00:08:06,362 --> 00:08:08,231 Check it, check it, what's this? 183 00:08:08,232 --> 00:08:10,467 A bacon drawer? Stacked. 184 00:08:10,468 --> 00:08:13,169 Rashers on rashers. Best part about these bad boys? 185 00:08:13,170 --> 00:08:15,304 Don't even have to cook them. 186 00:08:15,305 --> 00:08:17,708 Cook them right in your stomach! 187 00:08:19,243 --> 00:08:21,446 Wash it down with a little cream! 188 00:08:23,379 --> 00:08:25,013 (STOMACH GRUMBLING) 189 00:08:25,014 --> 00:08:27,282 (BELCHES) 190 00:08:27,283 --> 00:08:29,185 (STOMACH GRUMBLING) 191 00:08:29,186 --> 00:08:31,790 Oh, boy, that's-that's going right through me. 192 00:08:36,060 --> 00:08:39,329 Sponsored by Oscar Mayer and Land O'Lakes. 193 00:08:39,330 --> 00:08:42,065 If it's not Land O'Lakes, it's not cream! 194 00:08:42,066 --> 00:08:43,932 - (FARTS) - (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 195 00:08:43,933 --> 00:08:45,969 PETER: Hey, Meg? You can't use the Charmin. 196 00:08:45,970 --> 00:08:48,370 You're now sponsored by Safeway Rough 'n' Thin. 197 00:08:48,371 --> 00:08:50,473 Don't forget to wash the tip of your middle finger 198 00:08:50,474 --> 00:08:51,810 - when you're done. - (CAMERA CLICKS) 199 00:08:55,918 --> 00:08:57,520 (COMPUTER CHIMES) 200 00:09:01,451 --> 00:09:02,719 Mom, we've got a problem. 201 00:09:02,720 --> 00:09:05,488 See, I-I promoted Magic Shell ice cream topping on my channel, 202 00:09:05,489 --> 00:09:08,123 - so-so they sent me a ton of it. - Yeah, so? 203 00:09:08,124 --> 00:09:10,128 Dad Han Solo'd himself. 204 00:09:11,228 --> 00:09:13,498 Oh, my God, he's gonna suffocate. 205 00:09:14,898 --> 00:09:16,900 (CLAPPING) 206 00:09:19,169 --> 00:09:22,971 I created a vanilla ice cream Peter covered in Magic Shell. 207 00:09:22,972 --> 00:09:25,541 - Why? - Because I must. 208 00:09:25,542 --> 00:09:27,543 Don't listen to him. He's an imposter. 209 00:09:27,544 --> 00:09:29,211 - I'm the real Peter. - No, you're not. 210 00:09:29,212 --> 00:09:31,113 I made you. I'm the real Peter. 211 00:09:31,114 --> 00:09:33,383 Oh-oh, my God, I-I don't know which one to believe. 212 00:09:33,384 --> 00:09:36,352 What do you mean? I'm a guy, and he's ice cream. 213 00:09:36,353 --> 00:09:37,388 - (GRUNTS) - (GASPS) 214 00:09:39,989 --> 00:09:42,191 Thank God, Lois. 215 00:09:42,192 --> 00:09:45,195 Does anyone mind if I turn the thermostat down 216 00:09:45,196 --> 00:09:46,797 - to 32 degrees? - (CAMERA CLICKS) 217 00:09:49,834 --> 00:09:51,234 (COMPUTER CHIMES) 218 00:09:51,235 --> 00:09:54,604 ♪ There ain't a reason on Earth to waste it ♪ 219 00:09:54,605 --> 00:09:58,974 ♪ It ain't a crime to be good to yourself ♪ 220 00:09:58,975 --> 00:10:00,944 - ♪ Lick it up ♪ - (PHONE VIBRATES) 221 00:10:00,945 --> 00:10:02,311 ♪ Lick it up... ♪ 222 00:10:02,312 --> 00:10:03,580 - Yeah? - STEWIE: It's me. 223 00:10:03,581 --> 00:10:05,581 Can you change the station? 224 00:10:05,582 --> 00:10:07,383 (STATION CHANGES, "LICK IT UP" PLAYING) 225 00:10:07,384 --> 00:10:08,852 ♪ Whoa, lick it up... ♪ 226 00:10:08,853 --> 00:10:09,953 (STATION CHANGES, "LICK IT UP" PLAYING) 227 00:10:09,954 --> 00:10:11,086 ♪ Don't need to wait... ♪ 228 00:10:11,087 --> 00:10:13,956 ♪ Oh... ♪ 229 00:10:13,957 --> 00:10:16,359 ♪ Oh, yeah... ♪ 230 00:10:16,360 --> 00:10:19,963 Five different stations, all playing "Lick It Up" by Kiss. 231 00:10:19,964 --> 00:10:21,230 Hummer. 232 00:10:21,231 --> 00:10:23,032 Well, it's nice of you to once again drive me 233 00:10:23,033 --> 00:10:24,166 to day care, Brian. 234 00:10:24,167 --> 00:10:25,567 Sure. It's only three klicks away. 235 00:10:25,568 --> 00:10:27,936 I just hope I don't get branded a "Hummer guy." 236 00:10:27,937 --> 00:10:29,339 I can feel the Earth warming. 237 00:10:29,340 --> 00:10:31,139 No one needs a car this big. 238 00:10:31,140 --> 00:10:33,376 Yes, but I like how when you cut to an outside shot, 239 00:10:33,377 --> 00:10:35,612 Sam Elliott is narrating your drive. 240 00:10:35,613 --> 00:10:38,580 SAM ELLIOTT (OVER RADIO): When you need to take a talking baby to day care, 241 00:10:38,581 --> 00:10:40,048 you'll move mountains. 242 00:10:40,049 --> 00:10:42,618 And if the mountains won't move, 243 00:10:42,619 --> 00:10:45,021 drive right over 'em. 244 00:10:45,022 --> 00:10:47,589 Hummer. 245 00:10:47,590 --> 00:10:51,493 And, yes, Big Lebowski fans, I've seen the movie. 246 00:10:51,494 --> 00:10:54,331 I don't need to hear the lines. 247 00:10:59,503 --> 00:11:02,372 This place is paying Meg? Uh, to do what? 248 00:11:02,373 --> 00:11:04,339 Nothing. When you have a million followers, 249 00:11:04,340 --> 00:11:06,075 people just pay you to hang out. 250 00:11:06,076 --> 00:11:09,211 Yo, yo, yo! Everything here is made with corn syrup! 251 00:11:09,212 --> 00:11:12,482 - Just drink the corn syrup! - (CHEERING) 252 00:11:16,452 --> 00:11:18,620 (BELCHES) 253 00:11:18,621 --> 00:11:20,123 (CROWD GASPS) 254 00:11:20,124 --> 00:11:21,690 Oh, my God, she collapsed! 255 00:11:21,691 --> 00:11:24,426 We got to get her to the hospital. 256 00:11:24,427 --> 00:11:27,229 ♪ Don't want to wait till you know me better... ♪ 257 00:11:27,230 --> 00:11:29,932 - Anybody need a ride to the hospital? - (MUSIC CONTINUES LOUDLY) 258 00:11:29,933 --> 00:11:31,066 What? 259 00:11:31,067 --> 00:11:33,536 Does anybody need a ride to the hospital? 260 00:11:33,537 --> 00:11:35,204 - How is she? - (MUSIC CONTINUES LOUDLY) 261 00:11:35,205 --> 00:11:37,507 - What? - How is Meg? 262 00:11:37,508 --> 00:11:41,104 I'm worried! Her pulse is very weak! 263 00:11:41,946 --> 00:11:44,648 Her middle finger smells weird. 264 00:11:47,084 --> 00:11:49,238 Meg has Type 2 diabetes. 265 00:11:49,239 --> 00:11:50,651 The one where you're supposed to shame her, 266 00:11:50,652 --> 00:11:51,838 not feel sorry for her. 267 00:11:51,839 --> 00:11:54,507 But I need to draw a little more blood for the lab. 268 00:11:58,394 --> 00:12:00,262 As I suspected. Sap. 269 00:12:00,263 --> 00:12:03,065 - Vermont gold. - I love sugaring season. 270 00:12:03,066 --> 00:12:04,133 Me too. 271 00:12:04,134 --> 00:12:08,037 "The moon, though slight, was moon enough to show 272 00:12:08,038 --> 00:12:10,506 "On every tree a bucket with a lid, 273 00:12:10,507 --> 00:12:14,142 And on black ground, a bearskin rug of snow." 274 00:12:14,143 --> 00:12:17,245 Robert Frost, "Evening In A Sugar Orchard." 275 00:12:17,246 --> 00:12:19,382 Robert Frost! 276 00:12:19,383 --> 00:12:21,283 What? Dad? 277 00:12:21,284 --> 00:12:23,753 It's okay, Meg. You had a diabetic coma dream. 278 00:12:23,754 --> 00:12:27,124 Dad's still an idiot. I'm still an idiot. 279 00:12:33,730 --> 00:12:37,466 Coming up, local anchor brings a concealed weapon to work, 280 00:12:37,467 --> 00:12:39,234 as is his right. 281 00:12:39,235 --> 00:12:42,070 But first, popular Internet star Meg Griffin 282 00:12:42,071 --> 00:12:43,739 has Type 2 diabetes, 283 00:12:43,740 --> 00:12:47,777 and is also the new face of diabetes drug Pancresta. 284 00:12:47,778 --> 00:12:49,579 Refrigerator Meg here. 285 00:12:49,580 --> 00:12:53,215 If diabetes has you down, get your insulin levels up 286 00:12:53,216 --> 00:12:54,584 with Pancresta. 287 00:12:54,585 --> 00:12:56,185 ANNOUNCER: Pancresta may cause heart disease, 288 00:12:56,186 --> 00:12:57,552 swelling, allergic reactions. 289 00:12:57,553 --> 00:12:59,155 Do not take Pancresta if you are pregnant 290 00:12:59,156 --> 00:13:00,589 or plan on becoming pregnant. 291 00:13:00,590 --> 00:13:02,157 If you have a problem with addiction, 292 00:13:02,158 --> 00:13:04,393 do not take Pancresta, as smoking Pancresta may mimic 293 00:13:04,394 --> 00:13:06,195 the otherworldly high of heroin. 294 00:13:06,196 --> 00:13:07,796 Chopping up and snorting Pancresta may amplify 295 00:13:07,797 --> 00:13:10,166 and/or enhance sexual experience. 296 00:13:10,167 --> 00:13:13,069 Rock concerts on Pancresta may be excessively transformative. 297 00:13:13,070 --> 00:13:15,037 Pancresta may cause intense philosophical 298 00:13:15,038 --> 00:13:16,471 and scientific breakthroughs. 299 00:13:16,472 --> 00:13:18,541 Pancresta can be delivered directly to your home, 300 00:13:18,542 --> 00:13:20,743 and since we're here, why not, we'll do a bump. (SNIFFS) 301 00:13:20,744 --> 00:13:23,079 Pancresta is not for everyone, just the sexy people. 302 00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:25,214 Lame losers should not take Pancresta. 303 00:13:25,215 --> 00:13:26,516 Pancresta. 304 00:13:26,517 --> 00:13:29,420 Makes opiates look like (BLEEP) baby aspirin. 305 00:13:32,121 --> 00:13:34,690 Meg, like everyone who doesn't have diabetes, 306 00:13:34,691 --> 00:13:36,459 I'm not sure how it works, 307 00:13:36,460 --> 00:13:38,326 but I do know you could go blind, 308 00:13:38,327 --> 00:13:41,196 you could have organ failure, you could lose your feet. 309 00:13:41,197 --> 00:13:43,498 No amount of fame is worth this. 310 00:13:43,499 --> 00:13:45,634 James Woods High School will also be saluting 311 00:13:45,635 --> 00:13:47,737 their own diabetic Internet celebrity 312 00:13:47,738 --> 00:13:50,172 with a pep rally in her honor this Thursday. 313 00:13:50,173 --> 00:13:53,309 Sponsored by Pancresta, which feels like being inside 314 00:13:53,310 --> 00:13:55,713 the warm, wet mouth of the Lord. 315 00:13:57,380 --> 00:13:58,715 (ENGINE STARTS) 316 00:14:02,385 --> 00:14:04,787 (TIRES SCREECHING) 317 00:14:04,788 --> 00:14:07,355 You know, I think you like driving this Hummer. 318 00:14:07,356 --> 00:14:08,623 You're a Hummer guy. 319 00:14:08,624 --> 00:14:11,761 I'm not a Hummer guy, Stewie. I'm a responsible Prius driver 320 00:14:11,762 --> 00:14:13,729 who's making the best of a bad situation. 321 00:14:13,730 --> 00:14:15,531 I didn't ask for this car. 322 00:14:15,532 --> 00:14:17,767 I also didn't ask for these slowpokes in front of me. 323 00:14:17,768 --> 00:14:20,836 - Out of the way, you old bag! - Brian, that's Paul McCartney 324 00:14:20,837 --> 00:14:23,638 doing "Carpool Karaoke" songs we can afford. 325 00:14:23,639 --> 00:14:27,844 ♪ She'll be coming 'round the mountain when she comes ♪ 326 00:14:27,845 --> 00:14:29,644 ♪ Whoo! ♪ 327 00:14:29,645 --> 00:14:32,181 (HONKS) 328 00:14:32,182 --> 00:14:33,815 How should we end the scene, Brian? 329 00:14:33,816 --> 00:14:35,685 Sam Elliott or Kiss "Lick it Up"? 330 00:14:35,686 --> 00:14:37,386 Why not both? 331 00:14:37,387 --> 00:14:39,555 SAM ELLIOTT: "Lick it up. Lick it up. 332 00:14:39,556 --> 00:14:41,423 Oh, yeah." 333 00:14:41,424 --> 00:14:44,227 That's about all I care to read of that. 334 00:14:49,666 --> 00:14:51,801 Refrigerator Meg here 335 00:14:51,802 --> 00:14:53,402 having one of my favorite snacks: 336 00:14:53,403 --> 00:14:55,437 french fry sandwiches on white bread. 337 00:14:55,438 --> 00:14:59,175 Bad sugars and starches are the bomb! 338 00:14:59,176 --> 00:15:00,776 (WIND WHISTLING SOFTLY) 339 00:15:00,777 --> 00:15:02,580 (WIND CHIMES JINGLE) 340 00:15:04,581 --> 00:15:07,883 Meg's feet are gone. Rotted. 341 00:15:07,884 --> 00:15:10,719 I have a gift for knowing when something bad happens 342 00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:14,657 to someone's legs, kind of like a shining. 343 00:15:14,658 --> 00:15:16,693 (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) 344 00:15:20,596 --> 00:15:23,465 CLEVELAND: How you doing, doc? 345 00:15:23,466 --> 00:15:24,466 (PETER SHOUTS) 346 00:15:24,467 --> 00:15:27,104 (CLEVELAND SCREAMING) 347 00:15:31,941 --> 00:15:33,643 (HORROR MUSIC STING) 348 00:15:35,479 --> 00:15:37,946 Oh, you were thirsty, weren't you? 349 00:15:37,947 --> 00:15:39,614 Good girl. No! 350 00:15:39,615 --> 00:15:41,617 Good boy. You're a boy car. 351 00:15:41,618 --> 00:15:43,618 - Yeah, that's weird. Stop that. - Stop what? 352 00:15:43,619 --> 00:15:45,187 The way you're touching, feeding, 353 00:15:45,188 --> 00:15:48,257 - and talking to your car. - His name is Mark McGrath. 354 00:15:48,258 --> 00:15:49,926 What's happened to you? 355 00:15:49,927 --> 00:15:52,894 I-I don't know. All I know is I love this Hummer. 356 00:15:52,895 --> 00:15:54,530 God, the power. 357 00:15:54,531 --> 00:15:56,431 I deserved a sweet ride for a little while. 358 00:15:56,432 --> 00:15:58,200 It felt so good. 359 00:15:58,201 --> 00:16:00,503 People turned their heads when I pulled into Hooters, 360 00:16:00,504 --> 00:16:03,638 Lids, GNC. It's not fair! 361 00:16:03,639 --> 00:16:06,242 - How much creatine... - I've been doing a lot of creatine! 362 00:16:06,243 --> 00:16:08,243 - (CAR HORN HONKS) - All set. 363 00:16:08,244 --> 00:16:11,647 You can probably get another 130,000 miles out of this thing. 364 00:16:11,648 --> 00:16:13,916 Well, let's see... I drive about 4,000 a year, 365 00:16:13,917 --> 00:16:15,785 so when this car goes, I'll be... 366 00:16:15,786 --> 00:16:17,388 Dead for 18 years. 367 00:16:18,522 --> 00:16:20,458 Let me just say goodbye to the Hummer. 368 00:16:22,459 --> 00:16:24,727 I'll miss you, Mark McGrath. 369 00:16:24,728 --> 00:16:26,862 I'll miss scaring the hell out of homeless people 370 00:16:26,863 --> 00:16:29,632 with your cruise-ship-grade air horn. 371 00:16:29,633 --> 00:16:31,267 I'll miss catching the eye of women 372 00:16:31,268 --> 00:16:33,870 smoking outside of government buildings. 373 00:16:41,644 --> 00:16:44,546 But mostly, I'll miss driving a military vehicle 374 00:16:44,547 --> 00:16:46,782 45 miles an hour through a school zone 375 00:16:46,783 --> 00:16:49,017 - to get Crest Whitestrips. - (GLASS SHATTERS) 376 00:16:49,018 --> 00:16:52,321 The back side of this car is all wrecked. 377 00:16:52,322 --> 00:16:53,855 Who fixed this thing, your wife? 378 00:16:53,856 --> 00:16:56,592 - No, she can't fix a car. - That's my point. 379 00:16:56,593 --> 00:16:59,961 She passed away last month. She was addicted to Pancresta, 380 00:16:59,962 --> 00:17:02,530 so she didn't so much pass away as elevate 381 00:17:02,531 --> 00:17:04,767 to a higher level of consciousness. 382 00:17:04,768 --> 00:17:08,571 Just turned into a smiling beam of light right before my eyes. 383 00:17:08,572 --> 00:17:11,306 She told me to be at peace, and I was. 384 00:17:11,307 --> 00:17:13,709 I'm hearing a lot of good stuff about this Pancresta. 385 00:17:13,710 --> 00:17:15,544 Sorry, Mr. Griffin. I don't know what happened. 386 00:17:15,545 --> 00:17:16,812 Looks like you got the Hummer 387 00:17:16,813 --> 00:17:19,217 for another couple of days at least. 388 00:17:20,269 --> 00:17:22,617 Stewie, why did you do it? 389 00:17:22,618 --> 00:17:24,519 Oh, you were having so much fun, Bri. 390 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:26,588 Besides, the Earth is on fire. 391 00:17:26,589 --> 00:17:28,707 One dog driving a Prius won't fix that. 392 00:17:28,708 --> 00:17:29,861 Where to? 393 00:17:29,862 --> 00:17:32,627 Let's do donuts on Mark Ruffalo's lawn. 394 00:17:32,628 --> 00:17:34,963 - (TIRES SCREECHING) - BRIAN: Yeah! 395 00:17:34,964 --> 00:17:36,966 (LAUGHS, WHOOPS) 396 00:17:36,967 --> 00:17:39,003 Hey, come on, you guys. Knock it off. 397 00:17:40,636 --> 00:17:42,738 Hey, why don't you turn into the Hulk? 398 00:17:42,739 --> 00:17:44,573 Oh, right. You're just a Hollywood sissy. 399 00:17:44,574 --> 00:17:45,673 I'm calling the cops! 400 00:17:45,674 --> 00:17:48,376 Oh, you hear that, Brian? Hulk's calling the cops. 401 00:17:48,377 --> 00:17:52,202 (BOTH LAUGHING) 402 00:17:54,684 --> 00:17:56,951 SAM ELLIOTT: Turns out old Mark really was the Hulk. 403 00:17:56,952 --> 00:17:58,187 (STEWIE AND BRIAN SCREAMING) 404 00:17:58,188 --> 00:18:02,357 And Brian and Stewie got tossed clear up to New Hampshire. 405 00:18:02,358 --> 00:18:03,625 I'm Sam Elliott. 406 00:18:03,626 --> 00:18:06,529 This concludes your B story. 407 00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:12,367 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 408 00:18:12,368 --> 00:18:14,036 Look at 'em all out there, Meg. 409 00:18:14,037 --> 00:18:16,037 They're all here because of you. 410 00:18:16,038 --> 00:18:17,972 Hi, Meg. 411 00:18:17,973 --> 00:18:19,909 It's your friends, Patty, Ruth and Esther. 412 00:18:19,910 --> 00:18:21,943 If anyone remembered what we look like, 413 00:18:21,944 --> 00:18:23,979 it would be shocking how fat we are. 414 00:18:23,980 --> 00:18:26,348 You've inspired us to gain all this weight, 415 00:18:26,349 --> 00:18:28,383 and we just wanted to say thanks. 416 00:18:28,384 --> 00:18:30,520 (GIRLS FARTING MUSICALLY) 417 00:18:35,525 --> 00:18:38,496 ♪ ♪ 418 00:18:39,962 --> 00:18:41,564 Dad, I can't do this. 419 00:18:41,565 --> 00:18:43,699 All my friends are fat because of me. 420 00:18:43,700 --> 00:18:45,735 I don't want them to lose their feet, too. 421 00:18:45,736 --> 00:18:47,202 Everybody needs their feet. 422 00:18:47,203 --> 00:18:51,440 SAM ELLIOTT: Feet. Those little weirdos on the end of your legs. 423 00:18:51,441 --> 00:18:54,979 I used mine to mosey on over to the A story. 424 00:18:56,613 --> 00:18:58,146 I'm going out there to warn everybody 425 00:18:58,147 --> 00:19:00,149 about the dangers of unhealthy eating. 426 00:19:00,150 --> 00:19:02,485 Meg, I am so high on Pancresta right now, 427 00:19:02,486 --> 00:19:03,952 I don't care what you say. 428 00:19:03,953 --> 00:19:05,421 Three dimensions? 429 00:19:05,422 --> 00:19:08,090 No, six dimensions. 430 00:19:08,091 --> 00:19:11,126 (ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYING) 431 00:19:11,127 --> 00:19:13,094 Be at peace, Meg. 432 00:19:13,095 --> 00:19:14,699 Be at peace. 433 00:19:16,566 --> 00:19:18,568 Phone. Forgot my phone. 434 00:19:23,874 --> 00:19:26,475 - GIRL: We love you, Meg! - GIRL 2: Eat something gross! 435 00:19:26,476 --> 00:19:28,009 BOY: I was gonna take you to prom 436 00:19:28,010 --> 00:19:31,180 as part of a cruel bet, but I'm fat now, too! 437 00:19:31,181 --> 00:19:33,949 Hey, everybody. 438 00:19:33,950 --> 00:19:36,585 I want to talk to you guys about something important. 439 00:19:36,586 --> 00:19:38,153 Being healthy. 440 00:19:38,154 --> 00:19:40,588 I'm still Refrigerator Meg! 441 00:19:40,589 --> 00:19:44,125 But from here on, my fridge will be full of fruits, 442 00:19:44,126 --> 00:19:47,764 vegetables and lean meats! Yo, yo, yo! 443 00:19:48,999 --> 00:19:50,999 (BOOING) 444 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,700 Bring back the fridge! 445 00:19:52,701 --> 00:19:54,569 CROWD (CHANTING): Bring back the fridge! 446 00:19:54,570 --> 00:19:57,739 Bring back the fridge! Bring back the fridge! 447 00:19:57,740 --> 00:19:58,843 Aah! 448 00:20:00,743 --> 00:20:02,611 - (ELECTRONIC CHIME) - What's going on, guys? 449 00:20:02,612 --> 00:20:04,145 I'm Corey from Corey's World. 450 00:20:04,146 --> 00:20:05,881 Did you hear that all the Jewish kids 451 00:20:05,882 --> 00:20:07,884 stayed home from school that day? 452 00:20:11,521 --> 00:20:13,756 Is everyone okay, Principal Shepherd? 453 00:20:13,757 --> 00:20:15,958 Mostly. We only had one fatality. 454 00:20:15,959 --> 00:20:18,193 An old janitor was crushed under the bleachers. 455 00:20:18,194 --> 00:20:20,996 Huh. Has anyone claimed his feet? 456 00:20:20,997 --> 00:20:23,801 Yeah, and has anyone claimed his mop? 457 00:20:28,171 --> 00:20:32,240 Good news! The feet transplant was a success. 458 00:20:32,241 --> 00:20:34,108 So... 459 00:20:34,109 --> 00:20:36,880 good news all around. 460 00:20:39,682 --> 00:20:42,183 PETER: Well, I'm glad everything's back to normal. 461 00:20:42,184 --> 00:20:43,652 LOIS: No, it isn't! 462 00:20:43,653 --> 00:20:45,554 Meg got the dead janitor's feet, 463 00:20:45,555 --> 00:20:48,123 Brian and Stewie got thrown into New Hampshire by the Hulk, 464 00:20:48,124 --> 00:20:49,792 and you're a beam of light. 465 00:20:49,793 --> 00:20:51,861 CHRIS: I have the shining now. 466 00:20:51,862 --> 00:20:53,761 LOIS: And Chris has the shining now. 467 00:20:53,762 --> 00:20:55,663 PETER: Lois, just do a line of Panc. 468 00:20:55,664 --> 00:20:58,667 LOIS: (SNIFFS) Ah! Road House! 469 00:20:58,668 --> 00:20:59,802 PETER: Road House. 470 00:20:59,803 --> 00:21:01,703 SAM ELLIOTT: Road House... 471 00:21:01,704 --> 00:21:03,941 is a movie I was in. 472 00:21:03,942 --> 00:21:07,942 - Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT - - www.addic7ed.com - 36200

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