subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for Welcome.Home.Roscoe.Jenkins.2008.1080p.BluRay.x264.AAC5.1-[YTS.MX]

Afrikaans

Akan

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bemba

Bengali

Bihari

Bosnian

Breton

Bulgarian

Cambodian

Catalan

Cebuano

Cherokee

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish

Dutch

English Download

Esperanto

Estonian

Ewe

Faroese

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Guarani

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Interlingua

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Kinyarwanda

Kirundi

Kongo

Korean

Krio (Sierra Leone)

Kurdish

Kurdish (Soranî)

Kyrgyz

Laothian

Latin

Latvian

Lingala

Lithuanian

Lozi

Luganda

Luo

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mauritian Creole

Moldavian

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Montenegrin

Nepali

Nigerian Pidgin

Northern Sotho

Norwegian

Norwegian (Nynorsk)

Occitan

Oriya

Oromo

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese (Brazil)

Portuguese (Portugal)

Punjabi

Quechua

Romanian

Romansh

Runyakitara

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Serbo-Croatian

Sesotho

Setswana

Seychellois Creole

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhalese

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Spanish (Latin American) Download

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Tatar

Telugu

Thai

Tigrinya

Tonga

Tshiluba

Tumbuka

Turkish

Turkmen

Twi

Uighur

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Wolof

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:51,092 --> 00:00:55,263 [voice over] Lights, camera, access. 2 00:00:56,264 --> 00:01:00,352 [TV announcer] Yes, it's true. The master of midday TV goes prime time. 3 00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:04,397 Talk show host Dr. RJ Stevens has popped the question to Bianca Kittles, 4 00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:06,274 recent winner of Survivor: Kiribati. 5 00:01:06,358 --> 00:01:07,442 What's good, family? 6 00:01:07,525 --> 00:01:09,986 [TV announcer] The Doctor's show, with his irreverent guests... 7 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,113 I've been banging your sister. 8 00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:13,281 [woman screams] 9 00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:16,785 [TV announcer] ...party-like atmosphere and his "Team of Me" philosophy... 10 00:01:16,868 --> 00:01:19,079 - [RJ] The team of who? - [crowd] Me! 11 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:20,622 Rely on yourself. 12 00:01:20,705 --> 00:01:22,999 [TV announcer] ...has gotten a significant ratings boost 13 00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:25,710 since news of his impending nuptials became public. 14 00:01:25,794 --> 00:01:29,631 This is, no doubt, welcome news to the ultra-competitive, glammed-out Bianca. 15 00:01:29,714 --> 00:01:32,717 The TV reality star used every asset she possessed 16 00:01:32,801 --> 00:01:35,929 to outwit, outplay and outlast the competition 17 00:01:36,012 --> 00:01:37,472 on her quest for the million bucks. 18 00:01:37,555 --> 00:01:39,849 It's a Q-rating bonanza, 19 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,268 as these two couldn't be more perfectly matched. 20 00:01:42,352 --> 00:01:45,105 Life is good for the good doctor. 21 00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:46,648 - [Bianca] Wow. - On Access. 22 00:01:46,731 --> 00:01:49,566 That was fabulous! 23 00:01:49,650 --> 00:01:50,859 Honey, I'm so proud of you. 24 00:01:50,943 --> 00:01:52,945 - Thank you. [chuckles] - You're such a star. 25 00:01:53,028 --> 00:01:54,738 - Isn't he a star? - [crowd applauds] 26 00:01:54,822 --> 00:01:56,448 He is a superstar. 27 00:01:56,532 --> 00:01:59,785 Now, that is how you announce your engagement! 28 00:02:01,328 --> 00:02:02,746 [Marty] That was genius. 29 00:02:02,830 --> 00:02:05,207 - [Marty] You're the talk of the town! - [woman] Hey, RJ. 30 00:02:05,290 --> 00:02:07,376 Could you imagine this five years ago, bro? 31 00:02:07,459 --> 00:02:09,336 [RJ] With a girl like that? Hell, no. 32 00:02:09,420 --> 00:02:13,090 Hit show, big mansion on the block. Now, I'm international. 33 00:02:13,173 --> 00:02:14,383 You look great, by the way. 34 00:02:14,466 --> 00:02:18,137 Shit, man, that's all this tofu Bianca got me eating. 35 00:02:18,220 --> 00:02:21,265 Besides the hunger pains, being a vegan is the shit. 36 00:02:21,348 --> 00:02:22,349 [both laugh] 37 00:02:23,016 --> 00:02:25,352 - Cheers. - [Bianca] Honey! Telephone. 38 00:02:25,436 --> 00:02:27,521 Hmm. Huh? 39 00:02:27,604 --> 00:02:28,814 - [chuckles] - [Marty] Get going. 40 00:02:28,897 --> 00:02:33,152 [Bianca] That sounds wonderful. I can't wait. 41 00:02:33,235 --> 00:02:34,945 Great. 42 00:02:35,028 --> 00:02:39,074 Oh, well, it's nice speaking to you. Okay, hold on. 43 00:02:39,158 --> 00:02:42,077 It's your mom. Hurry up. Talk. We still have guests. 44 00:02:42,161 --> 00:02:43,245 - Hi! - [woman] Hi there! 45 00:02:43,328 --> 00:02:47,207 [Bianca] You made it. Oh, my God. You look amazing! Gorgeous! 46 00:02:47,291 --> 00:02:48,459 Hey, Mama. 47 00:02:49,042 --> 00:02:51,961 Well, hello, stranger. 48 00:02:52,045 --> 00:02:55,090 We're just beginning to think you just forgot all about us. 49 00:02:55,174 --> 00:02:58,927 No, Mama. [chuckles] I can't forget my number one girl. 50 00:02:59,011 --> 00:03:02,055 [RJ laughs over phone] And I didn't forget your anniversary, either. 51 00:03:02,139 --> 00:03:06,351 I sent y'all a 50 inch plasma TV. 52 00:03:06,435 --> 00:03:08,145 One inch for every year. 53 00:03:08,228 --> 00:03:13,025 Oh, that's sweet, baby. But we'd much rather meet Blanca. 54 00:03:13,108 --> 00:03:14,984 She sounds so nice. 55 00:03:15,068 --> 00:03:17,778 [RJ] Oh, Bianca, Mama. Not Blanca. 56 00:03:17,862 --> 00:03:21,824 [Mama J] Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was Blanca. 57 00:03:21,908 --> 00:03:24,535 Well, baby, you know it's our 50th anniversary. 58 00:03:24,619 --> 00:03:28,456 Mama, um, I don't think we're gonna be able to make it. 59 00:03:28,539 --> 00:03:29,540 - [gasps] - Uh... 60 00:03:29,624 --> 00:03:32,460 Jamaal, you know, he's got this big soccer game. 61 00:03:32,543 --> 00:03:34,670 [RJ] The boy loves himself some soccer, Mama. 62 00:03:34,754 --> 00:03:37,715 [Mama J] I know. He talks to Papa all the time. 63 00:03:37,798 --> 00:03:39,133 Jamaal and Daddy have been talking? 64 00:03:39,217 --> 00:03:41,469 Mm-hm. And writing letters. 65 00:03:41,552 --> 00:03:46,265 [Mama J] Lord! You know, we haven't seen that child since he was a baby. 66 00:03:46,349 --> 00:03:48,684 You've just got to come. Everybody's coming. 67 00:03:48,768 --> 00:03:52,396 We got Ellie and Cleavon, Clyde and Lucinda and... 68 00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:54,649 - Lucinda? - [Mama J] Oh, yes. 69 00:03:54,732 --> 00:03:57,068 - Lucinda and Clyde? - [Mama J] Mm-hm. 70 00:03:57,151 --> 00:03:59,195 - They're coming together? - [Mama J] I forgot to tell you. 71 00:03:59,278 --> 00:04:00,404 But I... I thought... 72 00:04:00,488 --> 00:04:03,157 [man speaking over phone] That's a lot of questions, boy. 73 00:04:03,241 --> 00:04:04,575 Hey, Daddy. 74 00:04:04,659 --> 00:04:08,454 Especially from someone who has shown very little interest in his family. 75 00:04:08,538 --> 00:04:09,580 Yes, sir, but I... 76 00:04:09,664 --> 00:04:13,876 If you can find the time to explore The Mind Of A Stripper, 77 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:17,296 or Sisters Gone Wild with your so-called "family," 78 00:04:17,380 --> 00:04:21,175 then you can find the time to spend with your actual family. 79 00:04:21,259 --> 00:04:22,760 So you've been watching! 80 00:04:22,843 --> 00:04:25,846 Boy, don't disappoint your mother. 81 00:04:28,099 --> 00:04:30,142 [sighs] 82 00:04:42,529 --> 00:04:44,197 [RJ sighs] 83 00:04:44,781 --> 00:04:47,867 - [whistle blowing] - [indistinct chatter] 84 00:04:47,951 --> 00:04:49,411 [RJ] Go, Jamaal! 85 00:04:49,494 --> 00:04:53,498 There you go, there you go! Right. Move. Push it! 86 00:04:54,082 --> 00:04:55,667 Right there! 87 00:04:55,750 --> 00:04:57,586 Let it go, Jamaal! 88 00:04:58,878 --> 00:05:00,839 [RJ] That's a winner, Jamaal! 89 00:05:00,922 --> 00:05:03,592 Woo-hoo! [laughs] 90 00:05:05,427 --> 00:05:06,928 - [crowd cheers] - [whistle blowing] 91 00:05:07,012 --> 00:05:10,390 - [cheers] - [indistinct chatter] 92 00:05:12,225 --> 00:05:16,646 Jamaal, way to go. Woohoo! Way to go. That's how you do that. 93 00:05:16,730 --> 00:05:21,651 Whoo! That's my boy. That's my boy. 94 00:05:22,652 --> 00:05:28,908 That's a lot of running for one goal. But, hey, at least you hit it. [chuckles] 95 00:05:28,992 --> 00:05:31,578 Dad, you should come more often. 96 00:05:31,661 --> 00:05:33,246 Hey, I'm here. 97 00:05:33,830 --> 00:05:36,416 Dad, why don't you want to go to Dry Springs? 98 00:05:36,499 --> 00:05:40,462 [grunts] Come on. Not you too. 99 00:05:40,545 --> 00:05:42,714 Papa Jenkins says Dry Springs is awesome. 100 00:05:42,797 --> 00:05:45,967 He said all my cousins will be there and I'd have a lot of fun. 101 00:05:46,051 --> 00:05:49,054 Oh, really? What else do y'all talk about? 102 00:05:49,136 --> 00:05:54,017 I don't know. School, my friends, soccer, global warming. 103 00:05:54,100 --> 00:05:55,644 Global warming? 104 00:05:55,727 --> 00:06:00,190 We talk about a lot of stuff. He's really cool. 105 00:06:00,273 --> 00:06:02,984 - [Jamaal] Can't we please go? - [sighs] 106 00:06:04,944 --> 00:06:06,321 I'll think about it, Jamaal. 107 00:06:08,113 --> 00:06:11,575 [Jamaal] Oh. Talk it over with the boss, first. 108 00:06:13,577 --> 00:06:15,829 Boss? [scoffs] 109 00:06:17,623 --> 00:06:21,710 Son, men run things in a relationship. 110 00:06:21,794 --> 00:06:23,754 And between us men... 111 00:06:23,837 --> 00:06:27,675 never let a woman tell you what to do, and how to do it. 112 00:06:28,717 --> 00:06:31,303 Your dad is in complete control. 113 00:06:31,387 --> 00:06:32,721 - [RJ screaming] - [Bianca] Who's in control? 114 00:06:32,805 --> 00:06:36,016 - [RJ screaming] - [Bianca] Tell me. Who's in control? 115 00:06:36,100 --> 00:06:38,394 - I don't know! - Take me higher, you can do it! 116 00:06:38,477 --> 00:06:40,312 - Oh, no. - [Bianca] Come on. 117 00:06:40,396 --> 00:06:41,939 Take me harder! 118 00:06:42,022 --> 00:06:43,857 - [Bianca] Come on, lover! - Mama! 119 00:06:43,941 --> 00:06:45,526 - [demonic voice] Yes! - Oh, shit! 120 00:06:45,609 --> 00:06:46,652 [demonic voice] Push it! 121 00:06:46,735 --> 00:06:48,153 - What the hell are you... - Yes! 122 00:06:48,237 --> 00:06:49,279 [screaming] 123 00:06:49,363 --> 00:06:52,908 [speaks indistinctly] 124 00:06:56,578 --> 00:06:57,830 [Bianca] Oh. 125 00:06:57,913 --> 00:07:00,999 Speaking in tongues. That's a first. 126 00:07:02,459 --> 00:07:06,296 Oh, I'm so proud of you. [smooches] 127 00:07:06,380 --> 00:07:10,175 [Bianca] I want to look hot for your family. 128 00:07:10,259 --> 00:07:14,263 - [hisses] - So now, time for my seven miles. 129 00:07:15,264 --> 00:07:18,016 - [thread mill machine beeping] - [footsteps pattering] 130 00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:20,060 Can you untie me first? 131 00:07:22,938 --> 00:07:23,981 Babe? 132 00:07:25,482 --> 00:07:28,193 Babe! Babe... 133 00:07:31,572 --> 00:07:34,282 [sighs] It's all done. I booked the tickets. 134 00:07:34,866 --> 00:07:38,161 Honey, I'm hearing a tinge of doubt in your voice. 135 00:07:38,244 --> 00:07:39,245 [RJ grunts] 136 00:07:39,328 --> 00:07:40,872 I'm cool. You know, it's... 137 00:07:40,955 --> 00:07:44,333 It'll be four days, then we get back to our lives. 138 00:07:44,417 --> 00:07:45,585 Exactly. 139 00:07:46,169 --> 00:07:48,129 This will solidify our union to the world. 140 00:07:49,255 --> 00:07:51,299 We'll tape your parents' banquet, 141 00:07:51,382 --> 00:07:54,635 you make a heartfelt speech, and the ratings? 142 00:07:54,719 --> 00:07:55,887 Oh, my God! 143 00:07:56,471 --> 00:07:58,890 - [Bianca sighs] - Yeah. 144 00:07:58,973 --> 00:08:04,103 "Country boy done good, returns home with his Survivor queen." 145 00:08:04,187 --> 00:08:06,898 [RJ chuckles] Hey, my audience will dig that. 146 00:08:07,482 --> 00:08:10,943 - [chuckles] - See? That's why I love you. 147 00:08:11,027 --> 00:08:14,489 Baby, I've dated all kinds of men. 148 00:08:14,572 --> 00:08:19,827 Athletes, CEOs, princes, bad boys, 149 00:08:19,911 --> 00:08:21,537 attorneys, mob bosses... 150 00:08:21,621 --> 00:08:24,332 No, I get... I get it. I get that. 151 00:08:24,916 --> 00:08:27,001 But... 152 00:08:27,084 --> 00:08:31,130 I've never connected with any of them the way that I do with you. 153 00:08:31,714 --> 00:08:34,884 RJ Stevens. Mm. 154 00:08:34,967 --> 00:08:36,344 Team of Me. 155 00:08:36,427 --> 00:08:37,929 [chuckles] 156 00:08:38,012 --> 00:08:40,306 Hmm, your very words helped me win Survivor, 157 00:08:40,389 --> 00:08:43,226 and they brought me right to you. 158 00:08:44,227 --> 00:08:45,520 - They did, didn't they? - Uh-huh. 159 00:08:45,603 --> 00:08:48,481 - [chuckles] - See? We connect. 160 00:08:48,564 --> 00:08:50,608 - Yes. - We're winners. 161 00:08:50,691 --> 00:08:52,735 - Mm-hm. - And you? 162 00:08:52,819 --> 00:08:54,821 You're the man. 163 00:08:54,904 --> 00:08:56,197 - I am the man. - Mm-hm. 164 00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:57,782 Say it louder. 165 00:08:57,865 --> 00:08:59,533 - I'm the man. - Say it louder. 166 00:08:59,616 --> 00:09:01,034 - I'm the man! - Yeah! 167 00:09:01,117 --> 00:09:05,539 [Outkast's "So Fresh, So Clean" playing] 168 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:25,517 [Bianca] Honey, don't ruin your outfit. 169 00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:30,105 Baby, men don't wear outfits. [grunts] 170 00:09:32,774 --> 00:09:34,943 What do you have in these bags, anyway? 171 00:09:35,026 --> 00:09:38,446 You went 39 days on a desert island with... 172 00:09:38,530 --> 00:09:40,073 With a toothpick and a thong. 173 00:09:40,156 --> 00:09:42,409 [chuckles] I need options. 174 00:09:42,492 --> 00:09:44,911 [RJ] Damn the options. I need room. 175 00:09:45,495 --> 00:09:47,873 [grunts] [pants] 176 00:09:47,956 --> 00:09:50,292 - I'd be happy to check that for you. - Hell, no! 177 00:09:50,375 --> 00:09:52,127 - [chuckles] - [RJ] Um... 178 00:09:52,711 --> 00:09:54,921 I had some bad experiences. 179 00:09:55,505 --> 00:09:57,966 I'll just slip it in the captain's closet. 180 00:09:58,049 --> 00:09:59,092 Uh... 181 00:10:00,260 --> 00:10:02,554 It's the safest place it could be. 182 00:10:19,905 --> 00:10:20,906 Oh. 183 00:10:22,908 --> 00:10:25,659 - Let's get this party started. - [chuckles] Uh-uh-uh. 184 00:10:25,743 --> 00:10:27,453 I got you beet juice. 185 00:10:27,536 --> 00:10:30,539 - Come on, baby, I want to live a little. - Precisely. 186 00:10:30,623 --> 00:10:33,125 - It's an excellent source of antioxidants. - [flight attendant] Your drink, sir. 187 00:10:33,208 --> 00:10:34,793 - Drink up. - [RJ sighs] 188 00:10:34,877 --> 00:10:36,045 [flight attendant] Enjoy. 189 00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:38,088 [beeps] 190 00:10:39,882 --> 00:10:40,966 Hey, Dad? 191 00:10:41,050 --> 00:10:42,509 Yeah, son? 192 00:10:42,593 --> 00:10:44,970 This is gonna be great. Thanks. 193 00:10:45,054 --> 00:10:46,805 Anything for you, my man. 194 00:10:49,141 --> 00:10:51,226 - [exclaims] - [Bianca gasps] 195 00:10:51,310 --> 00:10:55,064 [announcer] And now we ask you to please relax, 196 00:10:55,147 --> 00:10:57,775 sit back and enjoy the flight. 197 00:10:58,275 --> 00:11:00,235 [airplane zooms] 198 00:11:00,319 --> 00:11:02,446 [announcer] Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Georgia. 199 00:11:02,529 --> 00:11:05,324 How does his bag get lost in a captain's closet? 200 00:11:05,407 --> 00:11:06,992 - Explain that to me. - [man] Yes, ma'am. 201 00:11:07,076 --> 00:11:09,954 - Where's your father? - He won't come out of the bathroom. 202 00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:11,664 [announcer] The white zone is for immediate loading 203 00:11:11,747 --> 00:11:12,623 - and unloading only. - [knocks] 204 00:11:12,706 --> 00:11:14,583 Honey, how do the pants fit? 205 00:11:27,054 --> 00:11:29,181 - [Jamaal giggles] - [clears throat] 206 00:11:36,897 --> 00:11:39,316 You mean to tell me this is the only pair of pants 207 00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:41,402 you could find in this country-ass airport? 208 00:11:41,484 --> 00:11:43,654 I like it. 209 00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:45,406 Colors look fabulous on you. 210 00:11:46,991 --> 00:11:50,660 Babe, I look like a clown. 211 00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:52,829 Look... Look at how tight these are. Look! 212 00:11:54,706 --> 00:11:57,333 Ooh, I see that, tiger. [snarls] 213 00:11:57,417 --> 00:12:00,670 Come. Let's get the car. [clicks tongue] 214 00:12:03,505 --> 00:12:05,383 [chuckles] 215 00:12:05,466 --> 00:12:08,469 [announcer] Ladies and gentlemen, for your own safety and protection, 216 00:12:08,553 --> 00:12:10,346 please do not leave your bags unattended. 217 00:12:10,430 --> 00:12:14,892 [Keite Young's "Thinkuboutmi" playing] 218 00:12:17,729 --> 00:12:19,564 [Jamaal] Wow, the whole weekend is planned. 219 00:12:19,647 --> 00:12:22,900 There's a barbecue today, a softball game tomorrow, 220 00:12:22,984 --> 00:12:25,486 a fish fry on Saturday. 221 00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:28,114 Oh, look! An obstacle course race! 222 00:12:28,197 --> 00:12:32,201 And the anniversary banquet's Sunday night. Cool! 223 00:12:33,161 --> 00:12:37,707 [Jamaal scoffs] Whoo! Nice ears, Dad. 224 00:12:37,790 --> 00:12:41,085 - [Jamaal laughs] - Oh, man. Nice picture, Dad. 225 00:12:43,337 --> 00:12:44,255 [Jamaal] Oh, man. 226 00:12:52,638 --> 00:12:55,141 - [car honking] - [man shouting, indistinct] 227 00:12:55,224 --> 00:12:59,979 How terribly quaint. As if time stood still. 228 00:13:00,063 --> 00:13:02,899 It has. I told you, don't nothing ever happen around here. 229 00:13:02,982 --> 00:13:05,777 - [Gorilla Zoe's Hood Figga playing] - [car wheels screech] 230 00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:10,865 - [Reggie] That shit was tight, right? - [exclaims] 231 00:13:10,948 --> 00:13:12,574 Oh, damn! 232 00:13:13,575 --> 00:13:17,704 Oh, my God, baby. You get me so freaking hot! 233 00:13:17,788 --> 00:13:19,498 [Bianca] Do you know them? 234 00:13:19,580 --> 00:13:22,292 I don't know her, but that's my cousin Reggie. 235 00:13:22,375 --> 00:13:24,503 You got your jewelry? You got your purse? 236 00:13:24,585 --> 00:13:26,338 All right? Cause the boy could con Jesus. 237 00:13:28,298 --> 00:13:29,883 Oh, no. Oh, no, that's him. 238 00:13:29,966 --> 00:13:31,468 - Oh, that's him! - Who? 239 00:13:31,551 --> 00:13:33,095 Here he comes. Here he comes. 240 00:13:33,178 --> 00:13:37,933 My nigga Roscoe Steven Jenkins! Hollywood did came to town! 241 00:13:38,016 --> 00:13:40,644 - [laughs] What's up, dawg? - What's up? 242 00:13:40,727 --> 00:13:43,438 - What up, cuz? What up, cuz? - [Reggie laughs] 243 00:13:43,522 --> 00:13:45,440 - How you doing? How you do... - [laughing] 244 00:13:45,524 --> 00:13:48,276 Come on, man, give it up! Man, what's happening? 245 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:49,861 Oh, man, look at what you... 246 00:13:49,945 --> 00:13:52,364 Uh, look, you got them picnic tablecloth pants on. 247 00:13:52,447 --> 00:13:55,158 "Hey, Boo-Boo, let me get another picnic basket." 248 00:13:55,951 --> 00:13:58,453 I guess Outkast's about to name their third member. 249 00:13:58,537 --> 00:14:01,039 Li'l Roscoe 1000. [laughs] 250 00:14:01,123 --> 00:14:03,542 Yeah, but don't be mad cause you ain't up on the style. 251 00:14:03,624 --> 00:14:06,378 - Ain't that right, baby? - Roscoe? 252 00:14:06,461 --> 00:14:07,838 Why do you call him Roscoe? 253 00:14:07,921 --> 00:14:10,090 That's his government name. 254 00:14:10,173 --> 00:14:12,050 - [car honking] - [chuckles] 255 00:14:12,134 --> 00:14:16,888 Oh, not into full disclosure. I see. Okay. Welcome to the family. 256 00:14:16,972 --> 00:14:17,931 Oh, thank you. 257 00:14:18,014 --> 00:14:20,225 Lookie here, lookie here. 258 00:14:20,308 --> 00:14:23,436 First it was Survivor, now it's America's Next Top Model. 259 00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:25,647 [chuckles] Oh, stop it. Really? 260 00:14:25,730 --> 00:14:28,150 Oh, hell, yeah, really! 261 00:14:28,233 --> 00:14:31,903 My God, I'll drink your dishwater, bathwater, all types of waters. 262 00:14:31,987 --> 00:14:33,780 I'll drink all your waters. 263 00:14:33,864 --> 00:14:35,657 - Boy, you do your thing. - [RJ] Get off me. 264 00:14:35,740 --> 00:14:37,576 - [Reggie] Look at you doing your thing. - [RJ] Will you stop that? 265 00:14:37,659 --> 00:14:39,244 - You do your thing. - Get off me! 266 00:14:39,327 --> 00:14:40,704 Do your thing, boy. You do your thing. 267 00:14:40,787 --> 00:14:42,204 Why'd you keep checking my pockets, Reggie? 268 00:14:42,288 --> 00:14:44,456 You do your thing. You need to get me out there to LA. 269 00:14:44,540 --> 00:14:45,416 - Lookie here. Look. - [woman] Hi! 270 00:14:45,499 --> 00:14:47,960 - Hi! - I'm Amy. 271 00:14:48,043 --> 00:14:50,754 Yeah, me and Amy are friends, man. You know what I'm saying? 272 00:14:50,838 --> 00:14:54,008 She's been a real inspiration to me, putting my new hip-hop album out. 273 00:14:54,091 --> 00:14:57,052 - [Reggie] You know what I'm saying? - And my dad's company is financing it. 274 00:14:57,136 --> 00:14:59,847 It's Pimp Nasty Records! Word! 275 00:14:59,930 --> 00:15:02,266 - Pimp Nasty? [laughs] - [woman] Like that. 276 00:15:02,349 --> 00:15:03,309 [RJ] So everything is... 277 00:15:03,392 --> 00:15:05,561 - Hey, boy, what the... What you doing? - [barks] 278 00:15:05,644 --> 00:15:07,229 Get back! Get back! 279 00:15:07,313 --> 00:15:09,523 Water rat! That's a water rat, right there. 280 00:15:09,607 --> 00:15:11,984 - Get back! Get back! [groans] - [dog barks] 281 00:15:12,067 --> 00:15:13,569 [Bianca] It's okay, Fifi. 282 00:15:13,652 --> 00:15:15,613 [RJ] Reggie, man. She's a dog, man. 283 00:15:15,696 --> 00:15:16,739 It's Fiona. 284 00:15:16,822 --> 00:15:19,033 Yo quiero Taco Bell. I ain't know what it was, man. 285 00:15:19,116 --> 00:15:20,868 I thought it was a little fur coat with some feet, or something 286 00:15:20,951 --> 00:15:23,454 that damn walked over here, boy. 287 00:15:23,537 --> 00:15:25,039 [both chuckle] 288 00:15:25,122 --> 00:15:27,666 Man, Mama J sent us down here to get some ice. 289 00:15:27,750 --> 00:15:29,919 - And? - We're probably gonna need about 300. 290 00:15:30,002 --> 00:15:31,587 - $300? - [Reggie] Yeah. 291 00:15:31,670 --> 00:15:33,255 - For some ice? - For some ice. 292 00:15:33,339 --> 00:15:36,717 - You must think I'm a damn fool. - No, I know you ain't no damn fool. 293 00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:38,636 You standing there with that beautiful lady, right there. 294 00:15:38,719 --> 00:15:40,429 Look like you a lucky fool. 295 00:15:41,722 --> 00:15:43,515 [chuckles] 296 00:15:45,476 --> 00:15:47,686 What? It's just $300, baby. Go on. 297 00:15:47,770 --> 00:15:50,147 - You're not cheap, baby. - Yes, he is. 298 00:15:50,231 --> 00:15:52,983 You don't know him like we... He's tight. Yeah, he is. 299 00:15:53,067 --> 00:15:56,695 - It's only $300, baby. - That's it, $300. For your family? 300 00:15:57,655 --> 00:15:58,906 Please? 301 00:15:58,989 --> 00:16:00,574 Go on, baby. 302 00:16:01,659 --> 00:16:03,410 [scoffs] 303 00:16:03,494 --> 00:16:05,037 - For the family. - Mm-hm. 304 00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:08,081 [Jill Scott's "It's Love" playing] 305 00:16:15,255 --> 00:16:17,674 [man] All right, good to see you. 306 00:16:17,757 --> 00:16:19,467 - [Mama J] Papa? - [Papa J] Huh? 307 00:16:19,550 --> 00:16:20,551 They made it! 308 00:16:21,719 --> 00:16:24,180 Told you. Well, come on. 309 00:16:27,141 --> 00:16:28,142 [Mama J] Come on, baby. 310 00:16:29,852 --> 00:16:31,437 [Mama J exclaims joyfully] 311 00:16:32,021 --> 00:16:36,317 - Oh, my baby's home! - Hey, Mama! How you doing? 312 00:16:36,901 --> 00:16:39,320 [Papa J] Well, well. Look who showed up. 313 00:16:39,404 --> 00:16:43,658 My grandson's father, Dr. RJ Stevens. 314 00:16:43,741 --> 00:16:45,451 It's been a long time, Dr. Stevens. 315 00:16:45,535 --> 00:16:48,997 - Dad, that's just a stage name. - Yeah, I know. 316 00:16:50,164 --> 00:16:52,792 - Jamaal, welcome back. - Thanks, Papa Jenkins. 317 00:16:52,875 --> 00:16:55,461 [Mama J] Oh, and this is Blanca! 318 00:16:55,545 --> 00:16:57,630 Pretty girl, Roscoe. 319 00:16:57,714 --> 00:17:01,259 You must got some Indian in you, all that long, pretty hair. 320 00:17:01,843 --> 00:17:05,888 Roscoe, you been eating? You all skin and bone! 321 00:17:05,972 --> 00:17:07,515 Don't look like I never nourished you. 322 00:17:07,598 --> 00:17:10,018 - [both chuckle] - I know! Doesn't he look fabulous? 323 00:17:10,101 --> 00:17:12,186 [man] Yeah, he looks fabulous, all right. 324 00:17:12,270 --> 00:17:15,857 Downright metrosexual, with them young-ass pants on. 325 00:17:15,940 --> 00:17:19,360 Oh, no. You should have seen his ensemble before his little accident. 326 00:17:19,444 --> 00:17:20,737 It was exquisite. 327 00:17:20,820 --> 00:17:23,448 [chuckles] Are you kidding? Better than this? 328 00:17:25,408 --> 00:17:27,243 What? I didn't say "outfit." 329 00:17:27,827 --> 00:17:29,746 - Got you! Pounced on you. - [grunting] Get... Get off... 330 00:17:29,829 --> 00:17:31,331 - Get off me! - Let me see how strong you are. 331 00:17:31,414 --> 00:17:32,665 - Otis! - [Otis] Yeah. 332 00:17:32,749 --> 00:17:35,542 - [RJ groans] - [laughing] Just like old times again. 333 00:17:35,625 --> 00:17:37,252 - Lord, Otis. - Do it. Get out of it. 334 00:17:37,336 --> 00:17:39,504 - Mama! - Otis! Otis! 335 00:17:39,588 --> 00:17:40,922 Let go of me, O. 336 00:17:41,006 --> 00:17:44,509 Yeah, go ahead, do it. I want you to. Boy, introduce me. That's rude. 337 00:17:44,593 --> 00:17:45,761 I... 338 00:17:46,970 --> 00:17:48,221 [chuckles] 339 00:17:48,305 --> 00:17:53,560 Bianca, this is my country, neckbone-eating brother, Otis... 340 00:17:54,102 --> 00:17:55,312 The sheriff. 341 00:17:55,395 --> 00:17:57,939 Southern hospitality at your service. 342 00:17:58,023 --> 00:17:59,566 - Hmm. - Get up off that! 343 00:17:59,649 --> 00:18:01,985 - [chuckles] - This here is Ruthie. 344 00:18:02,069 --> 00:18:03,320 - Hi. - That's my baby she's carrying. 345 00:18:03,403 --> 00:18:06,198 Wow, Ruthie, you look like you're about to pop. 346 00:18:06,281 --> 00:18:07,699 No, I'm just six months. 347 00:18:09,117 --> 00:18:11,453 - But I bet y'all be loading up soon, huh? - [Bianca chuckles] 348 00:18:11,536 --> 00:18:15,248 Oh, God, no! Nothing's wrecking this figure. 349 00:18:15,749 --> 00:18:16,750 Hmm. 350 00:18:16,833 --> 00:18:20,962 At least not right now. Jamaal, say hello. 351 00:18:21,046 --> 00:18:22,798 Are you really "The Sheriff?" 352 00:18:22,881 --> 00:18:25,550 Mm-hm. "To serve and protect." 353 00:18:25,634 --> 00:18:27,260 [speaks in low voice] And occasionally whoop ass. 354 00:18:27,344 --> 00:18:29,679 Meet your cousins. Junior! Callie! 355 00:18:31,306 --> 00:18:35,143 Oh, damn! What are they on? 356 00:18:35,227 --> 00:18:37,521 All steroids and no carbs? 357 00:18:37,604 --> 00:18:40,065 [RJ chuckling] Them some thick-ass kids! 358 00:18:40,148 --> 00:18:42,734 No, I'm serious. Mama, them is thick-ass. No, I'm serious. 359 00:18:42,818 --> 00:18:45,320 Like, they be 12. Them some thick-ass... 360 00:18:48,073 --> 00:18:49,866 [sighs] Respect. 361 00:18:52,786 --> 00:18:54,204 This here's your cousin Jamaal. 362 00:18:54,287 --> 00:18:56,540 Get him a bat, and get him some batting practice. 363 00:18:56,623 --> 00:18:58,333 [Otis] And, Callie, go easy on him. 364 00:18:58,417 --> 00:19:01,377 - [thuds] - [spits] You got it, Daddy. 365 00:19:01,460 --> 00:19:02,294 Huh? 366 00:19:03,045 --> 00:19:07,091 Come on, son. You and Granddad will take them on together. 367 00:19:08,008 --> 00:19:10,136 - You play baseball, don't you? - [Jamaal] All right, I guess. 368 00:19:10,219 --> 00:19:13,681 Well, Blanca, you want to come in the house and freshen up? 369 00:19:13,764 --> 00:19:17,184 And, Roscoe, you get the bags and just take them up to your room. 370 00:19:17,268 --> 00:19:18,936 - Okay. - [Mama J] And, baby... 371 00:19:19,520 --> 00:19:25,359 Please find some clothes that fit. You got all your business in the street. 372 00:19:25,443 --> 00:19:26,402 [groans] 373 00:19:29,029 --> 00:19:32,366 Oh, God. It's good to see you, man. 374 00:19:34,869 --> 00:19:36,120 Little help with the bags, O? 375 00:19:36,704 --> 00:19:41,333 Man, I ain't no bellhop. Plus, I ain't had my steroids today. 376 00:19:41,417 --> 00:19:43,127 [laughs] Got you! 377 00:19:43,210 --> 00:19:47,631 Southern hospitality! Yeah, right. [scoffs] 378 00:19:47,715 --> 00:19:49,633 Oh, and next time you grabbing on people, 379 00:19:49,717 --> 00:19:52,845 wear some deodorant, you little fake-ass Conan! 380 00:19:56,265 --> 00:19:58,809 - Oh, shit! Mama! Mama! - [Otis] Come here, boy! 381 00:19:58,893 --> 00:20:00,728 I'm an all-State linebacker! Look at that speed! 382 00:20:00,811 --> 00:20:03,105 [RJ] Mama! I said leave me alone, O! Leave me alone! 383 00:20:03,189 --> 00:20:08,027 - [indistinct chatter] - [people laughing] 384 00:20:08,611 --> 00:20:12,865 [woman] I haven't had so many people in the kitchen since I don't know when. 385 00:20:12,948 --> 00:20:16,869 - [woman] No, you use this one. - [Betty] Oh! You a bad bitch! 386 00:20:16,952 --> 00:20:18,871 [Betty] Oh! Oh! 387 00:20:18,954 --> 00:20:22,833 Wait a minute, girl. I'm serious. I'm serious. You bad! 388 00:20:22,917 --> 00:20:25,668 You are the baddest bitch Survivor ever had. 389 00:20:25,752 --> 00:20:28,838 Soon to be my sister-in-law, up in my kitchen, girl. 390 00:20:28,922 --> 00:20:30,965 - I'm honored! [chuckles] - Thank you. 391 00:20:31,049 --> 00:20:32,675 All right, now, tell me the truth, okay? 392 00:20:32,759 --> 00:20:35,136 Tell me the truth, cause it's you and me. We relating. 393 00:20:35,220 --> 00:20:38,473 Can that hook-head handle you? Cause, see, we a lot alike, Binaca. 394 00:20:38,556 --> 00:20:42,227 Cause we too much woman for one man! You feel me? 395 00:20:42,310 --> 00:20:44,646 - [Betty laughs] - Betty, let the child breathe. 396 00:20:44,729 --> 00:20:46,898 - Now, is the tea ready? - It's right here, Mama. 397 00:20:46,981 --> 00:20:48,608 Binaca, you got to try my tea, girl. 398 00:20:48,691 --> 00:20:52,362 I'm telling you right now, this tea right here ain't no joke, Balolo. 399 00:20:52,445 --> 00:20:54,531 - Best in the county. - Ugh. It's Bianca. 400 00:20:54,614 --> 00:20:55,740 That's what I said. 401 00:20:56,324 --> 00:20:59,285 And I'd love to. Cheers! 402 00:21:01,120 --> 00:21:02,830 [Bianca spits] Oh! 403 00:21:02,914 --> 00:21:05,959 Oh, God, that's liquid diabetes! You drink that? 404 00:21:06,042 --> 00:21:09,212 - [Bianca] Ugh. - No, no. No, no, wait a minute now, baby. 405 00:21:09,295 --> 00:21:10,880 Don't get all uppity, okay? 406 00:21:10,964 --> 00:21:13,383 Cause I'm gonna let you know the brothers down at the pen, 407 00:21:13,466 --> 00:21:16,761 they rave about my sweet tea every Sunday at my Bible reading. 408 00:21:16,844 --> 00:21:20,056 It ain't the sweet tea. It's them short skirts you be wearing. 409 00:21:20,139 --> 00:21:24,018 I'm just doing my part, trying to be a good Christian. 410 00:21:24,102 --> 00:21:27,438 And if them brothers need to get a peek at this thong 411 00:21:27,522 --> 00:21:29,899 to get them through them long lonely nights, 412 00:21:29,983 --> 00:21:35,113 then, Father God and all the heavens up above and the Episcopals, so be it! 413 00:21:35,196 --> 00:21:36,864 Oh, girl, don't make me sick. 414 00:21:36,948 --> 00:21:38,449 - You know I'm pregnant. - Thank you. 415 00:21:38,533 --> 00:21:40,326 Betty, your thong is an image 416 00:21:40,410 --> 00:21:42,245 - I do not need. - Ditto. [chuckles] 417 00:21:42,829 --> 00:21:45,415 [chuckles] Wait a minute. 418 00:21:45,498 --> 00:21:49,002 Now, see, we trying to bond with you and everything, welcome you in, 419 00:21:49,085 --> 00:21:51,503 but you getting it twisted. You getting me twisted. 420 00:21:51,587 --> 00:21:53,505 But don't... get it twisted. 421 00:21:53,589 --> 00:21:55,674 This kitchen here is my domain. 422 00:21:55,757 --> 00:21:58,176 My domain. This ain't no kennel. 423 00:21:58,260 --> 00:22:01,305 And then this lab rat got to go. Got to go. 424 00:22:01,388 --> 00:22:04,099 Do you hear me? Am I clear? I bites dogs. 425 00:22:04,182 --> 00:22:05,559 - [snarls] - [dig whimpers] 426 00:22:05,642 --> 00:22:07,311 Know who I am, okay? 427 00:22:07,394 --> 00:22:09,605 Now, ditto that! 428 00:22:09,688 --> 00:22:12,691 - [operator] Yes, sir. Can I help you? - Yeah, hello. 429 00:22:12,774 --> 00:22:14,693 - Yeah. What is your name? - [operator] Patricia. 430 00:22:14,776 --> 00:22:16,194 - Luqueesha? - [operator] I can barely hear you. 431 00:22:16,278 --> 00:22:17,946 Look here, Luqueesha, somebody... 432 00:22:18,030 --> 00:22:20,991 - [operator] Sir, could you please hold? - Yeah, I'll hold. 433 00:22:43,639 --> 00:22:46,308 [chuckles] 434 00:22:49,269 --> 00:22:51,647 [dog growling] 435 00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:56,318 Bucky? 436 00:22:56,401 --> 00:22:59,071 You done messed around and got old, huh, Bucky? 437 00:22:59,153 --> 00:23:01,031 You still alive? [snarls] 438 00:23:01,114 --> 00:23:03,992 - [Bucky growls] - [soft chuckles] 439 00:23:04,076 --> 00:23:06,119 Yeah, you used to terrorize me when I was little. 440 00:23:06,203 --> 00:23:08,830 I don't play that now, man. I'm a grown man. 441 00:23:08,914 --> 00:23:11,416 - Look at me when I'm talking to you. - [whimpers] 442 00:23:11,500 --> 00:23:13,835 I should kick you in your ass right now, Bucky. 443 00:23:13,919 --> 00:23:16,088 Yeah. Yeah, when you bit my ankle, I should... 444 00:23:16,170 --> 00:23:18,381 - [operator] Hello, Dr. Stevens? - [RJ] Yeah, excuse me. 445 00:23:18,464 --> 00:23:20,800 - [operator] We found your bag. - [RJ] Well, all right. 446 00:23:20,883 --> 00:23:23,302 - [RJ] That's more like it. Mm-hm. - [operator] We need an address. 447 00:23:23,386 --> 00:23:24,595 - [thuds] - [RJ screaming] Oh! 448 00:23:24,679 --> 00:23:26,347 Get off me, you crazy dog! 449 00:23:29,392 --> 00:23:30,893 What the hell? 450 00:23:37,817 --> 00:23:39,985 You gonna stay inside all day, Dr. Stevens? 451 00:23:40,569 --> 00:23:43,906 No, sir. [scoffs] Daddy, you don't have to call me that. 452 00:23:45,198 --> 00:23:48,452 - I just don't want to offend the star. - Offend me? 453 00:23:48,536 --> 00:23:49,370 Hey, hey, Daddy. 454 00:23:50,705 --> 00:23:53,082 How come you never opened this plasma? 455 00:23:53,165 --> 00:23:55,167 I don't need a skinny TV. 456 00:23:55,251 --> 00:23:58,629 That console's been there since 1977. Good picture. 457 00:23:59,212 --> 00:24:03,592 Daddy, this is a Hi-Def flat screen! 458 00:24:03,676 --> 00:24:07,847 Football on Sundays, them hits'll be like, "Boom!" 459 00:24:07,930 --> 00:24:09,348 Make you feel like you really there. 460 00:24:09,432 --> 00:24:11,308 I am really gonna be there. 461 00:24:12,268 --> 00:24:13,853 Your cousin Clyde gave me season tickets. 462 00:24:15,938 --> 00:24:17,857 See that picture? 463 00:24:17,940 --> 00:24:20,693 That's his third dealership. 464 00:24:20,776 --> 00:24:23,154 Man, that Clyde is something special. 465 00:24:24,155 --> 00:24:27,240 Yeah. Clyde's special. 466 00:24:28,241 --> 00:24:29,827 I gotta get outside. 467 00:24:29,910 --> 00:24:33,831 I'm grooming the next Jackie Robinson. My grandson. 468 00:24:39,962 --> 00:24:42,757 [Reggie humming] 469 00:24:48,344 --> 00:24:49,763 - Reg. - Huh? 470 00:24:49,846 --> 00:24:51,848 That don't look like $300 worth of ice. 471 00:24:51,931 --> 00:24:53,767 It's hot down here, man. 472 00:24:53,850 --> 00:24:56,895 Half of it melted before you even got down. I'm telling you, the bag was... 473 00:24:56,978 --> 00:24:59,898 It's hot down. Ask anybody about the heat, 'Scoe. 474 00:24:59,981 --> 00:25:02,817 - I ain't gonna lie about none of that. - Whatever. 475 00:25:02,901 --> 00:25:04,110 - Hey, O. - Yo. 476 00:25:04,194 --> 00:25:07,363 How old is crazy-ass Bucky? Shouldn't he be dead by now? 477 00:25:07,447 --> 00:25:09,908 Oh, Bucky's at least 25 now. 478 00:25:09,991 --> 00:25:11,743 [Reggie] Yeah. Yeah, that dog is old, boy. 479 00:25:11,826 --> 00:25:15,830 Are you serious? That's, uh, 175 people years! 480 00:25:15,914 --> 00:25:17,916 And he's still a little player, I'm telling you. 481 00:25:17,999 --> 00:25:19,834 You better watch little Fiona around here. 482 00:25:19,918 --> 00:25:22,962 He gonna hit her in the one that stink and not the one that wink. 483 00:25:24,631 --> 00:25:26,257 [Reggie] He good at scooping up behind you. 484 00:25:26,341 --> 00:25:27,175 [growls] 485 00:25:27,759 --> 00:25:28,760 So, um... 486 00:25:30,595 --> 00:25:32,931 did I hear Clyde was coming with Lucinda? 487 00:25:35,767 --> 00:25:39,187 - Mm-hm. Should be here any minute now. - [chuckles] 488 00:25:39,270 --> 00:25:40,814 I thought she was engaged. 489 00:25:40,897 --> 00:25:43,358 - Uh-uh. - That ended a while ago, baby bro. 490 00:25:43,441 --> 00:25:45,401 Yeah, that, man, no, she moved to Atlanta, man. 491 00:25:45,485 --> 00:25:48,863 And that smooth nigga Clyde supposed to be hollering at her again. 492 00:25:48,947 --> 00:25:52,951 What you mean "again?" He ain't never been with her. Never! 493 00:25:53,034 --> 00:25:55,370 - Oh, lookie here. Little Hollywood man. - Ooh! 494 00:25:55,453 --> 00:25:57,914 - "He's never been with her. Never!" - "Never!" 495 00:25:57,997 --> 00:26:00,625 What, you look like you trying to throw your hat in the ring. 496 00:26:00,708 --> 00:26:01,543 [both laugh] 497 00:26:01,626 --> 00:26:04,045 No, I'm just setting the record straight, bubblehead. 498 00:26:05,296 --> 00:26:07,090 - [thuds] - Set the record straight on this. 499 00:26:07,173 --> 00:26:08,550 - [Reggie exclaims] - [Otis] Now. 500 00:26:08,633 --> 00:26:11,468 Good God Almighty, I smell them funky ribs! 501 00:26:11,552 --> 00:26:13,929 [Otis] Yeah, baby, they're good too. Here, baby bro. 502 00:26:14,012 --> 00:26:18,767 Now, I need your discriminate tongue to let me know if I'm still on track. 503 00:26:18,851 --> 00:26:20,227 You know how I gets down. 504 00:26:25,524 --> 00:26:27,442 Give him some bread and a Pepsi, right now! 505 00:26:27,526 --> 00:26:31,196 No, no, I'm cool. I'm gonna wait on the chicken. 506 00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:32,239 Skinless. 507 00:26:32,823 --> 00:26:34,992 - Why? You Muslim now? - Yeah, what the hell? 508 00:26:35,075 --> 00:26:37,202 - You a Five Percenter? - [RJ] Nah. 509 00:26:37,286 --> 00:26:41,415 I just adopted a low-fat, high-fiber diet. Bianca and I... 510 00:26:41,498 --> 00:26:43,709 [Otis groans] "Bianca and I..." I know what it is. 511 00:26:43,792 --> 00:26:47,170 The black Paris Hilton done sissified you off the pig. That's what's up. 512 00:26:47,254 --> 00:26:49,214 - It ain't like that, O. - [Reggie] Bullshit! 513 00:26:49,298 --> 00:26:51,049 You on that Hollywood shit. Nigga, please. 514 00:26:51,133 --> 00:26:56,054 Give me... Let me see this. You see this swine is fine, divine, sublime, 515 00:26:56,138 --> 00:26:57,931 - and right on time. - Right on time! 516 00:26:58,015 --> 00:26:59,224 [both laugh] 517 00:26:59,308 --> 00:27:02,060 - Man! Look at that. - Want some of this dipping sauce, baby? 518 00:27:02,144 --> 00:27:04,354 Yeah, go on. Go on, taste a little piece of that. 519 00:27:04,438 --> 00:27:06,607 Don't be scared. You got on the Kwanzaa outfit now. 520 00:27:06,690 --> 00:27:09,318 Get down, like you live. Go ahead and taste a piece of that. 521 00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:10,319 - [Reggie] Bite that. - Go on. 522 00:27:10,401 --> 00:27:12,863 How about a piece, Nelson Mandela? 523 00:27:12,946 --> 00:27:14,197 Stop being so scary, man. 524 00:27:14,281 --> 00:27:16,617 Farrakhan ain't nowhere around here. 525 00:27:16,700 --> 00:27:17,826 - [Reggie] Man! - What's up, man? 526 00:27:17,910 --> 00:27:19,703 - [chuckles] - Come on! Uh. Uh... 527 00:27:19,786 --> 00:27:22,205 The Last King from Scotland. Look. 528 00:27:22,289 --> 00:27:24,583 - With the Forest Whitaker eye. - [Otis laughs] 529 00:27:24,666 --> 00:27:27,127 Wait, look. Put a little barbecue sauce on the dead eye. 530 00:27:27,210 --> 00:27:29,212 - Might jump up out of there. - [Otis laughs] 531 00:27:29,296 --> 00:27:31,381 - [Reggie and Otis laugh] - [Otis] Boy, you crazy. 532 00:27:33,592 --> 00:27:39,055 Oh, yes, indeed, that's gonna be good! Stir that up for me, Bilante. 533 00:27:39,555 --> 00:27:42,642 Now, in episode 11, did you have to pull your titties out? 534 00:27:42,725 --> 00:27:44,977 I had to have that chocolate cake. 535 00:27:45,061 --> 00:27:47,605 But you threw it up. On purpose. 536 00:27:47,688 --> 00:27:51,567 Whether on Survivor or in life, I believe in winning at all costs. 537 00:27:52,860 --> 00:27:56,113 That's why RJ and I are perfectly matched. 538 00:27:56,697 --> 00:28:00,201 [laughs] Girl, you tripping. 539 00:28:00,284 --> 00:28:01,869 - [Betty laughing] - You better mind out, Betty. 540 00:28:01,953 --> 00:28:03,371 Come on now, Mama. 541 00:28:03,453 --> 00:28:06,082 Roscoe and winning don't even go in the same sentence. 542 00:28:06,165 --> 00:28:08,376 Only Clyde gets that distinction. 543 00:28:08,458 --> 00:28:11,337 - Who's Clyde? - Oh. 544 00:28:11,420 --> 00:28:12,338 I'm glad you asked. 545 00:28:12,421 --> 00:28:16,425 Clyde is our cousin. He came to live with us once his folks went on to glory. 546 00:28:16,509 --> 00:28:19,303 They became famous and left their child behind? 547 00:28:19,387 --> 00:28:21,263 Bitch, are you crazy? 548 00:28:21,347 --> 00:28:24,183 They was in a car accident. They dead. Goddamn! 549 00:28:24,266 --> 00:28:25,518 - [Betty] Anyway... - [woman] Oh. 550 00:28:25,601 --> 00:28:30,272 ...Now Roscoe and Clyde was fierce rivals, though "rival" is not quite accurate, 551 00:28:30,356 --> 00:28:33,734 cause Clyde used to whoop Roscoe's tail in everything. 552 00:28:33,818 --> 00:28:35,653 I don't know about "everything" now, Betty. 553 00:28:35,736 --> 00:28:38,155 Everything, Mama! 554 00:28:38,239 --> 00:28:41,367 - [ball thumping] - [Betty] Basketball. 555 00:28:41,450 --> 00:28:43,703 - [Clyde] Game! - [Betty] Checkers. 556 00:28:43,786 --> 00:28:46,956 - [thuds] - King me. 557 00:28:47,039 --> 00:28:49,458 - [Betty] Chess. - [thuds] [Clyde] Checkmate. 558 00:28:50,042 --> 00:28:52,461 - [Betty] Arm wrestling. - [grunts] 559 00:28:52,545 --> 00:28:55,089 - [indistinct chatter] - [laughs] 560 00:28:55,172 --> 00:28:58,050 Oops. That was me. 561 00:28:58,134 --> 00:29:00,552 - You're telling me RJ never won? - [Betty] Never. 562 00:29:00,635 --> 00:29:04,347 That is, of course, until the obstacle course in 1985. 563 00:29:04,431 --> 00:29:05,682 Obstacle course? 564 00:29:05,765 --> 00:29:08,018 [Betty] Yep. It's a Jenkins' family tradition. 565 00:29:08,101 --> 00:29:09,978 - [people cheering] - [Papa J] Have fun, now! 566 00:29:10,061 --> 00:29:14,107 Clyde, Roscoe, we got our eyes on you! 567 00:29:14,190 --> 00:29:16,192 [Betty] Clyde and Roscoe made a bet 568 00:29:16,276 --> 00:29:20,864 that the winner would get to ask Lucinda Allen to the Spring Formal. 569 00:29:20,947 --> 00:29:23,033 And who is Lucinda Allen? 570 00:29:23,116 --> 00:29:25,160 [Betty] Only the most popular Southern belle 571 00:29:25,243 --> 00:29:28,371 to ever come out of these parts, the Spring Formal Queen that year. 572 00:29:28,455 --> 00:29:30,248 [Bianca] So what happened? 573 00:29:30,331 --> 00:29:32,083 Girl, your man 574 00:29:32,167 --> 00:29:34,419 - took off like a house on fire! - [gunshot] 575 00:29:37,422 --> 00:29:38,840 [Papa J] Come on! 576 00:29:38,923 --> 00:29:40,508 [Betty] He moved through that obstacle course 577 00:29:40,592 --> 00:29:42,594 faster than a runaway slave. Doing it! 578 00:29:49,601 --> 00:29:54,189 [Betty] Now, see, Clyde was right there with his skinny ass, baby, neck and neck. 579 00:29:54,272 --> 00:29:57,275 He was trying to hold on until the end. 580 00:29:57,358 --> 00:29:58,610 - [Betty] But old Roscoe... - Come on! 581 00:29:58,693 --> 00:30:01,029 Old Roscoe broke that tape, baby. 582 00:30:01,112 --> 00:30:04,407 He smiled so hard, I thought his cheeks would burst. 583 00:30:04,491 --> 00:30:06,284 - Yes! - [people cheering] 584 00:30:06,367 --> 00:30:10,330 - [exclaiming] Woohoo! - [people cheering] 585 00:30:10,413 --> 00:30:13,249 [Betty] I ain't never seen Mama and Daddy so proud as that day. 586 00:30:13,333 --> 00:30:14,542 Oh! 587 00:30:14,626 --> 00:30:18,755 [Betty] Now, all Roscoe had to do was claim the real prize. 588 00:30:19,255 --> 00:30:22,050 - Lucinda? - Hey. 589 00:30:22,133 --> 00:30:24,969 Will you go to the Spring Formal with me? 590 00:30:26,512 --> 00:30:30,265 Oh, Roscoe, how sweet, but... Clyde just asked me. 591 00:30:33,143 --> 00:30:35,854 Come on, Lucinda, let's get a strawberry soda. 592 00:30:35,938 --> 00:30:38,273 - My treat. - [Lucinda] Okay. 593 00:30:38,357 --> 00:30:40,567 Bye, Roscoe. Great race. 594 00:30:42,027 --> 00:30:43,320 Bye. 595 00:30:43,403 --> 00:30:44,988 [Betty] I felt bad for the boy. 596 00:30:45,072 --> 00:30:46,573 [laughs] 597 00:30:46,657 --> 00:30:50,702 [Betty] Now, nobody knew about the bet, so Clyde just beat him to the punch. 598 00:30:50,786 --> 00:30:52,788 [Whitney Houston's "Saving All My Love" playing] 599 00:30:52,871 --> 00:30:55,833 [Betty] Clyde and Lucinda danced all night long, 600 00:30:55,916 --> 00:30:58,460 looking like eternal lovers. 601 00:30:59,753 --> 00:31:03,507 And Roscoe looked like a hot mess. 602 00:31:03,590 --> 00:31:06,635 And his date wasn't much better. 603 00:31:08,387 --> 00:31:09,638 Lord Jesus! 604 00:31:13,016 --> 00:31:16,436 But in typical Roscoe fashion, he snitched. 605 00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:17,813 But that mess backfired. 606 00:31:17,896 --> 00:31:22,651 Lucinda is a young lady, not some trophy you can win! 607 00:31:23,735 --> 00:31:26,905 - I'm very disappointed in you. - But what about Clyde? 608 00:31:26,989 --> 00:31:30,409 Clyde will be dealt with. 609 00:31:30,492 --> 00:31:33,996 Now, drop your britches and bend over. 610 00:31:41,753 --> 00:31:43,046 - [belt slaps] - [young RJ gasps] 611 00:31:43,130 --> 00:31:46,842 [Betty] But that Clyde... Oh, girl, he is a smooth operator. 612 00:31:46,925 --> 00:31:49,720 All right, what have you got to say for yourself? 613 00:31:49,803 --> 00:31:51,471 I let Roscoe win. 614 00:31:52,722 --> 00:31:55,600 It meant more to him to beat me. 615 00:31:55,683 --> 00:31:58,561 And it meant more to me to go out with Lucinda. 616 00:31:59,604 --> 00:32:00,897 She's so beautiful. 617 00:32:02,231 --> 00:32:03,524 I know you're disappointed. 618 00:32:04,942 --> 00:32:07,904 And if my parents were alive, they'd be disappointed too. 619 00:32:08,988 --> 00:32:11,032 But you're the only parent I got, Papa Jenkins. 620 00:32:11,115 --> 00:32:14,785 So you do what you think is right. I'll understand. 621 00:32:18,915 --> 00:32:23,669 Don't you ever let something like this ever happen again. 622 00:32:23,753 --> 00:32:24,962 [whispers] What? 623 00:32:25,046 --> 00:32:26,380 You understand? 624 00:32:30,551 --> 00:32:31,594 Yes, sir. 625 00:32:38,851 --> 00:32:42,772 [Betty] He went upstairs and cried like a baby. 626 00:32:42,855 --> 00:32:45,274 Now, how you know Roscoe was crying? 627 00:32:45,358 --> 00:32:47,902 - [sobs] - [Betty] Because all his hollering 628 00:32:47,985 --> 00:32:49,695 woke me up from a sound sleep. 629 00:32:49,779 --> 00:32:51,989 - [young RJ sobbing] - [laughs] 630 00:32:52,073 --> 00:32:54,450 So, are they still an item? 631 00:32:54,533 --> 00:32:56,285 They dated awhile, but you know, 632 00:32:56,369 --> 00:32:59,497 the Queen is too pure for the likes of Clyde. 633 00:32:59,580 --> 00:33:01,374 He needs a real woman. 634 00:33:01,457 --> 00:33:03,876 - Betty, y'all are cousins. - Whatever! 635 00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:09,966 Now, the point is, Roscoe ain't been the same since Clyde stole Miss Lucinda. 636 00:33:10,049 --> 00:33:14,762 [chuckles] I think they call that "evolution." 637 00:33:14,845 --> 00:33:19,391 RJ's clearly over any childhood crush. 638 00:33:19,474 --> 00:33:21,184 - [Betty] Really? - Really. 639 00:33:21,268 --> 00:33:24,521 Well, where do you think that "Team of Me" mess started? 640 00:33:26,022 --> 00:33:29,067 - [chuckles] - All right, Betty, that is enough. 641 00:33:29,150 --> 00:33:30,652 Okay, Mama, but I'm just saying... 642 00:33:30,735 --> 00:33:33,113 Come on in this house before I pop you. 643 00:33:33,196 --> 00:33:35,031 [Betty] Now, somebody help that white girl. 644 00:33:35,115 --> 00:33:37,951 She getting eggshells in the tater salad. Help her. 645 00:33:38,034 --> 00:33:40,704 [Mama J] Always running your mouth! You talk too much. 646 00:33:40,787 --> 00:33:43,123 [Betty] Don't nobody want no crunchy-ass potato salad. 647 00:33:43,206 --> 00:33:46,042 - And you put vinegar on these? - Yeah. 648 00:33:46,126 --> 00:33:47,585 [RJ] You gotta market these, O. 649 00:33:47,669 --> 00:33:49,087 Oh, no. 650 00:33:51,214 --> 00:33:53,049 - RJ! - Huh? 651 00:33:53,758 --> 00:33:55,302 What the hell are you eating? 652 00:33:56,511 --> 00:34:00,098 I'm not eating, baby, I'm tasting these soy ribs. 653 00:34:00,181 --> 00:34:04,019 - You want some? - Ugh! Forget it, carnivore! 654 00:34:04,102 --> 00:34:05,729 Why don't you tell me about Lucinda Allen? 655 00:34:05,812 --> 00:34:06,688 - Oh. Oh, shit. - Oh. 656 00:34:06,771 --> 00:34:08,398 - [RJ] Lucinda Allen? - That was a bad one. 657 00:34:08,481 --> 00:34:09,983 Well, see, I... 658 00:34:10,066 --> 00:34:11,609 - [woman screams] - Baby, she's just, you know... 659 00:34:11,693 --> 00:34:15,447 [screaming] Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Hey, Clyde's here now! 660 00:34:15,530 --> 00:34:17,991 [Maze's "Before I Let Go" playing] 661 00:34:45,934 --> 00:34:48,020 Let me introduce you. 662 00:34:48,103 --> 00:34:49,605 [Clyde] What's up, family? 663 00:34:52,066 --> 00:34:54,818 - Hi! Hey there, baby. What's up, baby? - [Betty chuckles] 664 00:34:54,902 --> 00:34:56,945 - You looking sharp. - Look at you. Betty, you too much. 665 00:34:57,029 --> 00:34:59,323 - [Otis] Clyde! - What's up, O? What's up, Big Law? 666 00:34:59,406 --> 00:35:01,825 I see you ain't getting no bigger. Look at you, boy. 667 00:35:01,909 --> 00:35:03,952 [Otis] Lucinda, what's up, baby? 668 00:35:04,036 --> 00:35:05,579 - Oh, my God, hi! - [both chuckle] 669 00:35:05,662 --> 00:35:07,039 Good seeing you, baby. 670 00:35:07,122 --> 00:35:09,375 Hey, look at you, boy. Look. You sure you our relative? 671 00:35:09,458 --> 00:35:11,335 [chuckles] Little Mexican. 672 00:35:11,418 --> 00:35:13,462 [Clyde] I got a little something for everybody. 673 00:35:13,545 --> 00:35:15,964 I stopped to pick up some red velvet cakes for the picnic. 674 00:35:16,048 --> 00:35:16,924 [Mama J gasps] 675 00:35:17,007 --> 00:35:21,011 From Cooter's Bakery in Tuscaloosa? 676 00:35:21,095 --> 00:35:24,556 Well, you only get one golden anniversary, Mama J. 677 00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:27,393 [chuckles] 678 00:35:27,476 --> 00:35:28,936 [Mama J exclaiming] 679 00:35:29,019 --> 00:35:30,604 - [people exclaiming] - [Clyde] Uh-oh. 680 00:35:30,687 --> 00:35:33,899 [Clyde] There he is! What's up, Papa J? How you doing, man? 681 00:35:33,982 --> 00:35:35,734 Is the fountain of youth around here somewhere, 682 00:35:35,818 --> 00:35:37,027 or you been taking that Viagra? 683 00:35:37,111 --> 00:35:38,946 - You better watch it. - [both chuckle] 684 00:35:39,029 --> 00:35:40,406 - See, 'Cinda? - [Papa J] Lucinda! 685 00:35:40,489 --> 00:35:42,116 I'm so glad to see you. Welcome home. 686 00:35:42,199 --> 00:35:43,200 Oh! Oh! 687 00:35:43,283 --> 00:35:49,373 Now that's nostalgia for you, right there. Family spirit award goes to Roscoe! 688 00:35:49,456 --> 00:35:51,959 Cross Colour Jones! Look at you, boy! 689 00:35:52,042 --> 00:35:54,336 Still wearing Otis' hand-me-downs. Come here, man. 690 00:35:54,420 --> 00:35:56,213 - [laughs] - [RJ] They're in the bag. 691 00:35:56,296 --> 00:35:58,507 Well, the airlines lost my bag, so... 692 00:35:58,590 --> 00:36:00,134 What's your excuse? 693 00:36:00,217 --> 00:36:03,429 [chuckles] Man... Hey, man, this, that Tiger Hoods, man. 694 00:36:03,512 --> 00:36:06,557 You know me. I get my nine holes in. 695 00:36:07,057 --> 00:36:08,434 - [Clyde chuckles] - Roscoe Jenkins. 696 00:36:08,517 --> 00:36:12,770 - Oh. - [chuckles] Oh, it's been ages. 697 00:36:12,854 --> 00:36:16,023 - Oh. - Oh, wow, it's been so long! 698 00:36:16,107 --> 00:36:17,275 [Bianca clears throat] 699 00:36:17,358 --> 00:36:22,280 Oh, um, Clyde, Lucinda, this is my fiancée, 700 00:36:22,363 --> 00:36:24,615 - uh, my fiancée, uh... - Bianca. 701 00:36:24,699 --> 00:36:25,783 - Bianca. - Bianca Kittles. 702 00:36:25,867 --> 00:36:27,827 How you doing? Sweeter than Skittles. 703 00:36:27,910 --> 00:36:30,121 - Girl, you prettier in person. - Is that so? 704 00:36:32,415 --> 00:36:35,251 You find somebody that say different, see if I don't slap them to sleep. 705 00:36:35,334 --> 00:36:39,213 - And I don't even get violent. - It's my pleasure, Bianca. [chuckles] 706 00:36:39,297 --> 00:36:43,468 - Wow, congratulations, you two. - The pleasure's mine. [scoffs] 707 00:36:46,804 --> 00:36:47,638 What's up with that? 708 00:36:47,722 --> 00:36:51,851 And, Lord, we thank you for the pork ribs, 709 00:36:51,934 --> 00:36:54,896 as well as, yes, the coleslaw, and... 710 00:36:54,979 --> 00:36:57,315 I hear what you're saying, but look, I gotta go. 711 00:36:57,398 --> 00:37:01,110 Thank you! And we thank you for the sweet potato pie. 712 00:37:01,194 --> 00:37:05,448 And, yes, for the scrumptious red velvet cakes from Cooter's... 713 00:37:05,531 --> 00:37:07,867 We thank You, Lord! And they all did say... 714 00:37:07,950 --> 00:37:10,077 [all] Amen! 715 00:37:11,412 --> 00:37:13,331 We thank you for that beautiful benediction. 716 00:37:13,414 --> 00:37:14,957 - [Otis] You mean long. - Otis! 717 00:37:15,041 --> 00:37:18,544 Mama and I are just filled with joy. 718 00:37:18,628 --> 00:37:22,924 So many friends and family have joined us on this very special occasion. 719 00:37:23,007 --> 00:37:26,260 [Papa J] This woman has put up with me for five decades, 720 00:37:26,344 --> 00:37:28,554 and I love her now more than ever. 721 00:37:28,638 --> 00:37:30,723 Thank you, baby. 722 00:37:30,806 --> 00:37:33,392 - [applauds] - [Otis] All right. Hear, hear, now. 723 00:37:34,685 --> 00:37:36,770 [Betty] Clyde, you try some of this corn, baby? 724 00:37:36,853 --> 00:37:37,812 Mm-hm. 725 00:37:37,896 --> 00:37:40,732 And don't you forget these rolls, cause I made them with you in mind. 726 00:37:40,815 --> 00:37:43,568 - You butter the biscuits? - [laughs] You know I did. 727 00:37:43,652 --> 00:37:45,111 - [Otis] Hey, Betty? Betty. - What? 728 00:37:45,195 --> 00:37:48,406 He's your cousin, not a potential tip. 729 00:37:48,490 --> 00:37:50,617 You know what, Otis? Okay? Shut up. 730 00:37:50,700 --> 00:37:52,744 Now, I'm just glad to see him, that's all. 731 00:37:52,827 --> 00:37:55,580 And, and... Okay, you too, queenie. 732 00:37:55,664 --> 00:37:58,917 - Oh. Thank you, Betty. - Mm-hm. 733 00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:02,212 So, Lucinda, I hear you two were high school sweethearts. 734 00:38:02,295 --> 00:38:05,131 Oh, well, that was a long time ago. 735 00:38:06,716 --> 00:38:09,761 Yeah. But you never forget your first love. 736 00:38:09,844 --> 00:38:10,929 Ain't that right, 'Cinda? 737 00:38:11,012 --> 00:38:13,848 - [Lucinda] Yeah, I guess not. - [sighs] 738 00:38:13,932 --> 00:38:16,017 Look at her. Just as beautiful as ever. 739 00:38:16,101 --> 00:38:18,812 You know, I'm gonna leave some of these hood-rats alone, 740 00:38:18,895 --> 00:38:21,898 get real serious about making this girl Mrs. Stubbs. 741 00:38:21,982 --> 00:38:25,110 You know, matter of fact... Otis, get me a broom right now. I'm gonna jump! 742 00:38:25,193 --> 00:38:27,404 - [Otis and Clyde laugh] - Mazel tov! 743 00:38:27,487 --> 00:38:29,823 [Clyde] You know what I'm talking about, Otis? 744 00:38:29,906 --> 00:38:31,283 Don't believe this one, okay? 745 00:38:31,366 --> 00:38:33,994 He's more interested in jumping bones than jumping brooms. 746 00:38:34,077 --> 00:38:35,453 [all] Ooh. 747 00:38:35,537 --> 00:38:38,790 Well, best of luck to the both of you. You make a great couple. 748 00:38:38,873 --> 00:38:40,333 [coughs] Bullshit! 749 00:38:40,417 --> 00:38:41,251 Betty! 750 00:38:41,334 --> 00:38:42,627 [chuckles] 751 00:38:42,711 --> 00:38:46,881 Excuse me, y'all, I had a piece of celery stuck in my throat. 752 00:38:46,965 --> 00:38:50,176 [Clyde] Well, you know, I admit it. I like to play. 753 00:38:51,052 --> 00:38:53,513 But, after I get me a couple of more dealerships, 754 00:38:53,597 --> 00:38:58,184 I will be King of the South, who will need his Queen. 755 00:38:58,268 --> 00:38:59,352 - [pecks] - [Lucinda chuckles] 756 00:39:00,604 --> 00:39:02,730 Well, my king has a surprise. 757 00:39:03,522 --> 00:39:08,986 RJ's having a professional camera crew film the anniversary banquet! 758 00:39:09,069 --> 00:39:10,571 [indistinct chatter] 759 00:39:10,654 --> 00:39:12,364 - [Bianca] Tell them, honey! - [people chattering] 760 00:39:12,448 --> 00:39:14,825 - Go ahead! - Uh... 761 00:39:14,908 --> 00:39:18,829 Like my baby said, it was supposed to be a surprise. 762 00:39:18,912 --> 00:39:22,333 A gift, really, you know. Uh, no big deal. Just a... 763 00:39:22,416 --> 00:39:25,044 Just a little something special for y'all. 764 00:39:25,127 --> 00:39:26,629 That's so sweet. 765 00:39:26,712 --> 00:39:29,381 Wait a minute. Hold up. Nigga, you got some cameras hidden around? 766 00:39:29,465 --> 00:39:30,924 - You done brought some cameras? - Reggie... 767 00:39:31,008 --> 00:39:34,720 You got that shit hidden around here? Oh, y'all seen his show. 768 00:39:34,803 --> 00:39:37,181 Roscoe be jumping out of bushes on little midgets. 769 00:39:37,264 --> 00:39:38,932 - [Mama J] Midgets? - [all laugh] 770 00:39:39,016 --> 00:39:42,561 Neglected albino children. Al-Qaeda leaders. 771 00:39:42,645 --> 00:39:47,775 - [chants in Arabic] - Rice, chicken kebab, chicken falafel. 772 00:39:47,858 --> 00:39:51,195 - [singing] - [chuckles] Boy, you crazy. 773 00:39:51,278 --> 00:39:54,281 I'm telling you, they be scattering like roaches, like cops. 774 00:39:54,365 --> 00:39:56,700 You gonna win a Emmy, and I'm voting for you. 775 00:39:56,784 --> 00:40:00,621 Remember, son, this is a family celebration, 776 00:40:00,704 --> 00:40:02,331 not some Hollywood production. 777 00:40:02,915 --> 00:40:04,416 Yes, sir. 778 00:40:04,500 --> 00:40:07,544 Oh, hell, it'll be all right, Papa J. 779 00:40:07,628 --> 00:40:09,838 I'm sure old Roscoe gonna do the right thing. 780 00:40:09,922 --> 00:40:13,217 I'm just glad to see your baby boy back gracing us with his presence. 781 00:40:13,300 --> 00:40:15,678 - [scoffs] - [Clyde] You done good, 'Scoe. 782 00:40:15,761 --> 00:40:20,808 You got a outstanding career, beautiful fiancée, great son. 783 00:40:20,891 --> 00:40:22,518 You finally winning, man. 784 00:40:22,601 --> 00:40:25,604 Don't even matter that you could never beat me at nothing. 785 00:40:25,688 --> 00:40:29,357 Oh, shit! That's the button. 786 00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:30,858 [RJ] What you trying to do, Clyde? 787 00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:35,071 I'm trying my best to be a better man. 788 00:40:35,154 --> 00:40:38,533 And you trying to drag me into a penis-swinging contest? 789 00:40:38,616 --> 00:40:40,118 - [Betty] My goodness. - That definitely ain't no contest. 790 00:40:40,201 --> 00:40:42,787 [all laugh] 791 00:40:42,870 --> 00:40:45,456 You a sad man, Clyde. 792 00:40:45,540 --> 00:40:48,084 Your competitive edge imprisons you. 793 00:40:50,002 --> 00:40:53,506 Feel good for what you've done, not for what you haven't. 794 00:40:53,589 --> 00:40:58,302 The one loss you suffered at my hands is still a burden to you. 795 00:40:58,386 --> 00:41:01,723 Get over it. I have. 796 00:41:01,806 --> 00:41:04,642 That's the "Team of Me." 797 00:41:07,437 --> 00:41:08,688 Oh! 798 00:41:08,771 --> 00:41:10,148 [whispers] That's right, baby. 799 00:41:10,231 --> 00:41:14,026 Oh! And, uh, just for the record, 800 00:41:14,110 --> 00:41:16,863 I'll beat you again. And worse. 801 00:41:17,947 --> 00:41:18,906 [Clyde] Is that right? 802 00:41:19,490 --> 00:41:22,535 Care to make it interesting? Little wager, perhaps? 803 00:41:22,618 --> 00:41:27,039 For what? You'd just find a way to renege again, renigga. 804 00:41:27,123 --> 00:41:28,416 [all] Oh. 805 00:41:28,499 --> 00:41:31,127 - I ain't never reneged on no bet. - You a damn liar! 806 00:41:31,210 --> 00:41:33,671 Oh, this is getting hot! 807 00:41:33,755 --> 00:41:36,466 You know damn well what the hell I'm talking about. 808 00:41:36,549 --> 00:41:39,135 You're a sore loser, and you stole what was mine. 809 00:41:51,731 --> 00:41:53,523 Lemonade is good, Mama. 810 00:41:55,901 --> 00:41:59,613 There it is. That bitch done made you tough, Roscoe. 811 00:42:00,989 --> 00:42:04,242 You hungry as shit, but that bitch done made you tough! 812 00:42:05,744 --> 00:42:08,455 - [door closing] - [RJ] What is wrong with you? 813 00:42:08,538 --> 00:42:11,374 [Bianca] I can't believe you're still pining after the prom queen. 814 00:42:11,458 --> 00:42:15,086 - We only said three words to each other! - Forty words. 815 00:42:15,670 --> 00:42:18,465 And that Clyde, he's a smug son of a bitch. 816 00:42:18,548 --> 00:42:22,677 No wonder he's a car salesman. He's slick and unethical. 817 00:42:23,178 --> 00:42:26,181 Why the hell did you tell everybody about the camera crew? 818 00:42:26,264 --> 00:42:27,766 They were gonna see them anyway. 819 00:42:27,849 --> 00:42:30,727 And besides, we were losing ground. I had to make a move. 820 00:42:31,269 --> 00:42:33,021 Bianca, this is not Survivor. 821 00:42:34,606 --> 00:42:36,525 Oh, yes, it is. 822 00:42:37,025 --> 00:42:41,321 [grunts] Look, baby, baby, baby. Listen. Listen. 823 00:42:41,404 --> 00:42:45,033 [sighs] Let's not fight, okay? I'm sorry. 824 00:42:45,116 --> 00:42:48,954 Lucinda was just a crush, but I moved on. 825 00:42:50,872 --> 00:42:51,915 So you're over her? 826 00:42:51,998 --> 00:42:54,334 How can I not be, with you as my lady? 827 00:43:01,216 --> 00:43:06,012 Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah! Oh, baby. 828 00:43:06,096 --> 00:43:09,975 All the time I spent here, I never got a little piece of nothing. 829 00:43:11,309 --> 00:43:15,063 No way. These walls are way too thin. 830 00:43:15,146 --> 00:43:17,357 And plus, your family listens. 831 00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:19,608 That's ridiculous! 832 00:43:19,692 --> 00:43:23,988 Look, now, I want to speak in tongues. [speaks indistinctly] 833 00:43:24,071 --> 00:43:26,448 Nope. Forget it. 834 00:43:27,032 --> 00:43:28,117 Damn! 835 00:43:34,373 --> 00:43:36,750 Think you so damn special. 836 00:43:36,834 --> 00:43:41,338 I sent a plasma, you bought cake. Negro, please! 837 00:43:41,422 --> 00:43:44,008 Hey, Roscoe, I didn't know you were still up. 838 00:43:44,091 --> 00:43:47,428 - Hey, Lucinda, how you doing? - I'm great. 839 00:43:47,511 --> 00:43:49,763 - Who you talking to? - [stammers] Nobody. 840 00:43:50,347 --> 00:43:55,686 Well, actually, myself. I do that. You know, just practicing for the show. 841 00:43:55,769 --> 00:43:57,938 You know, keep it fresh, you know? 842 00:43:58,022 --> 00:43:59,440 Okay, I see. 843 00:43:59,523 --> 00:44:00,900 Can you take a break? 844 00:44:08,198 --> 00:44:10,618 - Damn! - [chuckles] 845 00:44:10,701 --> 00:44:13,537 - This cake is scrumptious. - I knew you'd like it. 846 00:44:13,621 --> 00:44:15,915 So, you said your publicist introduced you? 847 00:44:15,998 --> 00:44:19,460 Yeah. Well... Yeah. 848 00:44:19,543 --> 00:44:23,547 We had her on the show after she won. 849 00:44:23,631 --> 00:44:26,884 And, uh... We just sort of connected, you know? 850 00:44:26,967 --> 00:44:29,053 Oh, so how does she and Jamaal get along? 851 00:44:29,136 --> 00:44:32,765 Real good. You know, she got him eating right. 852 00:44:33,807 --> 00:44:35,809 - Maternal stuff. - He's a great kid. 853 00:44:35,893 --> 00:44:37,603 Oh, thank you. 854 00:44:37,686 --> 00:44:38,687 Um... 855 00:44:40,147 --> 00:44:41,982 So, you and Clyde? 856 00:44:42,066 --> 00:44:43,400 Oh. Uh, no. 857 00:44:43,484 --> 00:44:46,986 He was a familiar face when I moved to Atlanta. 858 00:44:47,070 --> 00:44:49,238 He's sweet, but your cousin's a player. 859 00:44:50,281 --> 00:44:52,992 What happened to your engagement? Wasn't there some guy? 860 00:44:53,076 --> 00:44:55,745 Are you keeping tabs on me, Roscoe Jenkins? 861 00:44:55,828 --> 00:44:59,165 Well, no, no, I heard things. You know... Look at my ears. 862 00:44:59,248 --> 00:45:01,876 You know, I heard... I heard it. You know I heard it. 863 00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:04,337 [laughs] You stupid. 864 00:45:04,420 --> 00:45:07,131 Oh, what did you hear? Huh? 865 00:45:07,215 --> 00:45:09,425 That I went to school to find a husband, right? 866 00:45:10,009 --> 00:45:14,180 See? Yeah, I did. I got engaged early. 867 00:45:14,263 --> 00:45:17,600 I had the vision of having a two-income household, 868 00:45:17,684 --> 00:45:22,021 three kids before 30, Sunday brunch with my homegirls. 869 00:45:22,105 --> 00:45:25,942 - Sounds good to me. - Don't it, though? 870 00:45:26,442 --> 00:45:31,990 But the student loans never go away. You're still broke after grad school. 871 00:45:33,157 --> 00:45:34,909 And he didn't want kids. 872 00:45:36,536 --> 00:45:37,704 Ever. 873 00:45:38,746 --> 00:45:41,416 So... dream deferred. 874 00:45:42,417 --> 00:45:44,836 I feel you. [sighs] 875 00:45:44,919 --> 00:45:48,923 Me and Jamaal's mom was a disaster. [scoffs] 876 00:45:49,007 --> 00:45:53,761 I wasn't ready to be a parent, either. But he's my son. 877 00:45:54,345 --> 00:45:57,015 Spoken like a true Jenkins man. 878 00:46:06,107 --> 00:46:09,318 - You need to finish that cake. - [chuckles] Shit. 879 00:46:09,402 --> 00:46:11,403 If I don't watch this figure, who will? [chuckles] 880 00:46:11,486 --> 00:46:12,904 I could think of some takers. 881 00:46:13,822 --> 00:46:17,533 Me too! Sign me up for that booty duty! 882 00:46:17,617 --> 00:46:20,746 Hey, Reggie. We were just saying good night. 883 00:46:20,829 --> 00:46:23,248 Hell, no, don't let me interrupt. Don't let me interrupt. 884 00:46:23,331 --> 00:46:26,835 - Don't let him interrupt. - [Lucinda] Oh, no, no, no. It's okay. 885 00:46:27,419 --> 00:46:32,799 I need to go home and see my parents. And I'll talk to you guys tomorrow, okay? 886 00:46:32,883 --> 00:46:35,093 - Good night. - Good night. 887 00:46:43,602 --> 00:46:46,813 Tell the truth. You got a woody, don't you? 888 00:46:46,897 --> 00:46:49,691 Fool, if I had a woody, I'd flip this table over. 889 00:46:49,775 --> 00:46:51,109 We was just catching up. 890 00:46:52,486 --> 00:46:55,030 Your daddy don't want that plasma you bought. 891 00:46:55,113 --> 00:46:56,406 I'll tell you that right now. 892 00:46:56,490 --> 00:46:59,201 And it's a damn shame that it's just going to waste like that. 893 00:47:00,619 --> 00:47:03,747 Just a TV, just sitting there, ain't gonna do nothing, man, is... 894 00:47:03,830 --> 00:47:05,665 There's so many poor people down here that need... 895 00:47:05,749 --> 00:47:07,834 Would you like that plasma, Reggie? 896 00:47:07,918 --> 00:47:10,087 [stammers] I... Boy, I ain't lying. I could use it. 897 00:47:10,170 --> 00:47:11,505 Would you like to have it? 898 00:47:11,587 --> 00:47:14,883 Yeah! I'm gonna get it and freak it. I'm gonna have it right. 899 00:47:14,966 --> 00:47:16,301 Not gonna happen. 900 00:47:16,384 --> 00:47:18,594 - Just tight. That's just... - [woman imitates wailing] 901 00:47:20,847 --> 00:47:23,558 Hey, Lone Ranger, it's time to saddle up. 902 00:47:23,642 --> 00:47:26,019 - [slaps] - Uh-oh. Gotta go. 903 00:47:26,937 --> 00:47:30,690 Hi-yo, Silver! Off to the ATM machine! 904 00:47:33,693 --> 00:47:36,862 - [woman] Giddy-up! - [Reggie] Giddy-up! 905 00:47:41,408 --> 00:47:44,078 It's gonna be a long weekend. 906 00:47:46,580 --> 00:47:48,999 - [birds chirping] - [rooster crowing] 907 00:47:59,927 --> 00:48:01,303 [groans] 908 00:48:03,430 --> 00:48:08,352 [Missy Elliott's "Get Ur Freak On" playing] 909 00:48:29,456 --> 00:48:32,042 [farts] Excuse me. 910 00:48:32,126 --> 00:48:34,545 [farts louder] Oh, excuse. 911 00:48:37,298 --> 00:48:39,466 Baby, my Downward Dog is fine. 912 00:48:39,550 --> 00:48:43,012 Your alignment's off. Watch me. 913 00:48:43,095 --> 00:48:44,346 [inhales] 914 00:48:46,140 --> 00:48:48,475 [exhales] 915 00:48:48,976 --> 00:48:52,062 Damn, you are flexible! 916 00:48:52,146 --> 00:48:53,147 Good morning, Reggie. 917 00:48:53,230 --> 00:48:56,192 Good morning to you! What's up, 'Scoe? 918 00:48:56,275 --> 00:48:57,943 Fuck you looking at, Reggie? 919 00:48:58,027 --> 00:49:00,529 You wanna glue your eyes back into your head, now? 920 00:49:00,613 --> 00:49:04,157 Oh, my fault. I didn't mean to look, but I was just checking out the pose, man. 921 00:49:04,240 --> 00:49:06,743 - Hey! - That is nice. That's hot. That is so hot. 922 00:49:06,826 --> 00:49:10,079 - Can I help you with something, Reggie? - Oh, your bag is here. 923 00:49:10,163 --> 00:49:11,956 You couldn't just say that from Jump Street. 924 00:49:12,040 --> 00:49:12,874 I was distracted, 925 00:49:12,957 --> 00:49:15,627 cause it looked like somebody hit you in the face with a sack of nickels. 926 00:49:15,709 --> 00:49:18,296 Well, maybe a foot in your ass will help you focus, huh? 927 00:49:18,379 --> 00:49:21,341 Maybe a slice of red velvet cake will help you focus. 928 00:49:28,014 --> 00:49:31,017 Man, get your look and move on. One look. 929 00:49:32,018 --> 00:49:35,146 - [Bianca groans] - ...and down. 930 00:49:35,230 --> 00:49:38,233 - That's it. One. One! - One more, one more, one time. 931 00:49:38,316 --> 00:49:42,820 - That's it. Move on! - Oh, my God. Damn, 'Scoe! 932 00:49:42,904 --> 00:49:44,738 [Bianca] Namaste. 933 00:49:44,822 --> 00:49:46,407 Oh! Hey. 934 00:49:46,491 --> 00:49:48,993 Reggie's got a Frank Aaron jersey too, baby. 935 00:49:49,077 --> 00:49:52,413 That's Hank, baby. And mine is a limited edition. 936 00:49:52,497 --> 00:49:54,624 Reggie wouldn't even know where to look for one. 937 00:49:54,707 --> 00:49:56,292 Oh, it's your world, player. 938 00:49:56,376 --> 00:49:59,796 I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut, if you know what I mean. 939 00:49:59,879 --> 00:50:01,798 [Fifi yelps] 940 00:50:01,881 --> 00:50:06,427 Man, you need to get her pregnant soon. Come on, Bucky, let's go. 941 00:50:07,303 --> 00:50:09,389 [Bucky pants] 942 00:50:09,973 --> 00:50:12,517 [whimpers] 943 00:50:14,352 --> 00:50:16,980 My God. Did you see that? 944 00:50:18,940 --> 00:50:21,859 Yeah. That's my jersey, ain't it? 945 00:50:24,570 --> 00:50:25,863 Come on, Jamaal. 946 00:50:25,947 --> 00:50:30,117 - I don't think I'm cut out for softball. - Don't be such a girl about it. 947 00:50:31,493 --> 00:50:34,663 Jamaal, forget all that. You a natural. 948 00:50:34,746 --> 00:50:37,541 Plus, this was your dad's sport. All right? 949 00:50:37,624 --> 00:50:42,170 The main thing is to relax and keep cool. Just like your dad. 950 00:50:42,254 --> 00:50:45,340 [RJ] Come on, we got them, we got them! We got them, we got them! 951 00:50:45,424 --> 00:50:46,258 We got them! 952 00:50:46,341 --> 00:50:47,968 - [groans] - [man] You out, sucka! 953 00:50:48,051 --> 00:50:49,678 - Damn it! - [Otis] Good throw, Betty! 954 00:50:49,761 --> 00:50:52,639 How could this fool steal everything but third? 955 00:50:52,723 --> 00:50:56,560 Cause I got a cannon in this arm, boy! A-Rod ain't stealing on me. 956 00:50:56,643 --> 00:50:58,687 Damn, I'm a thief. I don't never get caught stealing. 957 00:50:58,770 --> 00:51:00,272 Can't steal third, brother, not around here. 958 00:51:00,355 --> 00:51:02,065 [stammers] My shirt! 959 00:51:02,149 --> 00:51:03,734 - Go home, man. - Yeah, my fault. 960 00:51:03,816 --> 00:51:06,987 - This ain't authentic, is it? - [chuckles] 961 00:51:08,322 --> 00:51:10,866 - Where does that child think she is? - I don't know. 962 00:51:10,949 --> 00:51:15,412 - But I bet that come with paint remover. - [Mama J] Good God! 963 00:51:15,495 --> 00:51:18,582 [RJ] Jamaal! Widen your stance, son. Keep your eye on the ball. 964 00:51:18,665 --> 00:51:22,002 - Choke up on the bat. Focus. - Okay. 965 00:51:22,085 --> 00:51:23,503 [Betty] Do what your father told you. 966 00:51:23,587 --> 00:51:26,423 Now, don't be scared of Callie. I know she's big. 967 00:51:26,506 --> 00:51:29,301 We all big. That's why you in question. 968 00:51:29,384 --> 00:51:31,511 [RJ] Jamaal! Focus. 969 00:51:31,595 --> 00:51:33,680 [Otis] All right, it's 0 and 2. Come on, Jamaal. 970 00:51:35,891 --> 00:51:38,101 - Strike three! - [Mama J] That's all right, baby. 971 00:51:38,727 --> 00:51:41,104 - [Mama J] That's a good try. - Ugh. God, this kid's pathetic! 972 00:51:41,188 --> 00:51:42,439 [Mama J] You're making Grandma proud. 973 00:51:42,522 --> 00:51:45,400 - [Papa J] Good try, Jamaal. - [Betty] No, no, it wasn't, Daddy. 974 00:51:45,484 --> 00:51:47,819 Now, what is he, Roscoe? One of them meatless people? 975 00:51:47,903 --> 00:51:50,280 [Betty] Is he one of them vegans or vogans, whatever? 976 00:51:50,364 --> 00:51:53,200 You need to feed that child, Roscoe. That's what's wrong with him! 977 00:51:53,700 --> 00:51:56,035 [grunts] 978 00:51:56,118 --> 00:51:57,703 - Good one, Callie! - [spits] 979 00:51:57,787 --> 00:51:59,914 [Betty] Can't understand nothing. He's dumb in the brain. 980 00:52:00,498 --> 00:52:01,916 [sighs] 981 00:52:04,043 --> 00:52:06,837 [Betty] Come on, Roscoe! Hit one for Mama! 982 00:52:06,921 --> 00:52:09,799 - All I need you to do is make contact. - I got this. 983 00:52:09,881 --> 00:52:12,385 You got a strikeout a-coming if you ain't careful. 984 00:52:12,468 --> 00:52:16,097 You's got a strikeout coming if you ain't careful. 985 00:52:16,180 --> 00:52:18,057 "Boy, you's go..." 986 00:52:19,308 --> 00:52:21,477 [Otis] Y'all don't take the smile for a weakness all the time, okay? 987 00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:23,437 - [Reggie] I've never thought that. - Y'all think I'm weak or something. 988 00:52:23,521 --> 00:52:25,106 - No, I don't think you weak. - Okay. 989 00:52:25,189 --> 00:52:27,108 - Don't. Okay. - I thought you was Uncle Ben. 990 00:52:28,317 --> 00:52:31,821 Hey. Take a seat. Let me get this, right here. 991 00:52:31,903 --> 00:52:34,115 All right. That's what I'm talking 'bout, now! 992 00:52:34,198 --> 00:52:36,158 Let the games begin! Come on, baby! 993 00:52:37,576 --> 00:52:41,705 - What the hell you think you doing, Clyde? - I'm about to strike you out, player! 994 00:52:41,789 --> 00:52:44,208 I've got a narrow strike zone, boy. 995 00:52:44,291 --> 00:52:45,584 Oh, that's all right, Papa J. 996 00:52:45,668 --> 00:52:48,629 Anything wider than Roscoe head would be unfair. 997 00:52:48,712 --> 00:52:51,549 - [all laugh] - Everybody sit down. Have a seat. 998 00:52:51,632 --> 00:52:54,844 Take a load off. Get comfortable. Don't worry about it. 999 00:52:54,926 --> 00:52:57,929 Bring the La-Z-Boys out here or something. Come on, boy. 1000 00:52:58,013 --> 00:52:59,598 I got this, right here. 1001 00:53:00,932 --> 00:53:03,811 What's up, 'Scoe? You ready? 1002 00:53:03,894 --> 00:53:06,439 You want to be in the big time? Here we go, yeah. 1003 00:53:06,522 --> 00:53:07,939 Right here, baby! 1004 00:53:09,191 --> 00:53:10,317 Strike! 1005 00:53:11,360 --> 00:53:14,363 [chuckles] That's better than air conditioning right there, boy. 1006 00:53:14,447 --> 00:53:17,783 [babbles] Feel that breeze? 1007 00:53:17,867 --> 00:53:20,951 - [Betty laughs] - Come on, Roscoe! 1008 00:53:21,035 --> 00:53:24,747 They just talking smack, baby. You can do it, baby! 1009 00:53:24,831 --> 00:53:27,876 Focus, RJ! Come on. Get a hit! 1010 00:53:28,376 --> 00:53:31,421 Whoa. "Focus, RJ!" [chuckles] 1011 00:53:32,005 --> 00:53:34,007 All right, everybody good? 1012 00:53:34,090 --> 00:53:36,468 Betty, all right, give me a little something. 1013 00:53:36,551 --> 00:53:37,760 [Betty] Okay. 1014 00:53:43,433 --> 00:53:46,853 Okay, I got you. Good to go. All right, cool, cool, cool. 1015 00:53:48,438 --> 00:53:49,689 Right here. 1016 00:53:57,906 --> 00:53:59,282 Crush it! Kill it! 1017 00:54:02,619 --> 00:54:03,786 - [thuds] - Uh. 1018 00:54:03,870 --> 00:54:07,499 - [screaming] You hit my mama! - Mama! 1019 00:54:07,582 --> 00:54:11,669 - Mama J! - [Mama J] Oh, Jesus. 1020 00:54:11,753 --> 00:54:14,547 [Papa J] That done knocked the wig off and everything. Damn! 1021 00:54:17,884 --> 00:54:19,511 [RJ] Get off me about it right now. 1022 00:54:19,594 --> 00:54:21,429 - [Otis] Really? Get off you about it? - That's right. 1023 00:54:21,513 --> 00:54:23,515 Yeah, okay? Stop sweating me about it. 1024 00:54:23,598 --> 00:54:25,808 I was trying to tell you to wait on the flutterball. 1025 00:54:25,892 --> 00:54:27,894 You up there swinging like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, 1026 00:54:27,977 --> 00:54:30,230 now my mama got a red titty on her head. 1027 00:54:30,313 --> 00:54:31,731 She's my mama too, O. 1028 00:54:31,814 --> 00:54:34,526 We don't know that. You could be adopted. 1029 00:54:34,609 --> 00:54:37,862 Look, I gotta get the fish. Meet me at Monty's. Can you do that? 1030 00:54:37,946 --> 00:54:39,906 [car horn honking] 1031 00:54:41,324 --> 00:54:44,953 Mama, I'm sorry. Really sorry, Mama. 1032 00:54:45,035 --> 00:54:48,539 I know, baby. Mama will be all right. 1033 00:54:48,622 --> 00:54:51,667 Mama, I was trying to hit it out the park. I didn't know it was going that way. 1034 00:54:51,750 --> 00:54:54,002 I'm getting my headache, baby. Be quiet. 1035 00:54:54,503 --> 00:54:56,171 - Daddy... - Son... 1036 00:54:56,255 --> 00:54:58,507 We all make mistakes. 1037 00:54:58,590 --> 00:55:00,008 We just have to learn from them. 1038 00:55:01,593 --> 00:55:05,430 Though I don't know what you learn by giving your mama a concussion. 1039 00:55:10,227 --> 00:55:12,980 - [police car's horn honks] - [officer] Hey, Big O! 1040 00:55:13,062 --> 00:55:15,107 I don't know how you take it down here, O. 1041 00:55:15,190 --> 00:55:18,110 [scoffs] Man, you was the best linebacker in the state. 1042 00:55:18,193 --> 00:55:20,612 If it wasn't for your knee injury, shoot! 1043 00:55:20,696 --> 00:55:24,866 Man, you'd be in the NFL, living in a mansion, driving a Benz. 1044 00:55:24,950 --> 00:55:26,952 [chuckles] Yeah, that's good, man. 1045 00:55:27,035 --> 00:55:28,662 But it wasn't in God's plans for me. 1046 00:55:28,745 --> 00:55:31,999 God's plan is cool, but you needed the "me" plan. 1047 00:55:32,081 --> 00:55:36,253 Oh, man, stop talking that bullshit. I ain't no failure. I'm a king. 1048 00:55:36,336 --> 00:55:37,921 [Otis] I got a great family. 1049 00:55:38,005 --> 00:55:41,550 I live in a great community that I love and that loves me back. 1050 00:55:41,633 --> 00:55:43,927 - You the failure. - How do you figure that? 1051 00:55:44,011 --> 00:55:45,596 [chuckles] I made it. 1052 00:55:45,679 --> 00:55:48,348 Oh, why? Cause you got some money? Cause you on TV? 1053 00:55:48,432 --> 00:55:51,768 - [Otis] What else you got to show for it? - Everything I ain't have growing up. 1054 00:55:51,852 --> 00:55:53,729 What you ain't have that was that important? 1055 00:55:55,147 --> 00:55:57,816 Hey, why don't Jamaal know how to play baseball? 1056 00:55:57,899 --> 00:56:00,109 You used to love to play, and you was halfway decent. 1057 00:56:00,193 --> 00:56:05,198 Man, I ain't got time for all that. Besides, Jamaal only loves soccer. 1058 00:56:05,282 --> 00:56:06,115 [chuckles] 1059 00:56:06,199 --> 00:56:09,077 I think Jamaal would love whatever sport his father showed interest in. 1060 00:56:09,161 --> 00:56:12,455 [scoffs] Oh, so you a parenting expert, now? 1061 00:56:13,456 --> 00:56:15,458 Man, all I'm saying is... [thuds] 1062 00:56:15,541 --> 00:56:17,125 Don't let money raise your kids. 1063 00:56:17,209 --> 00:56:20,128 Well, don't let cornbread and chitlins raise yours. 1064 00:56:20,212 --> 00:56:23,382 What you looking at me like that for, O? 1065 00:56:23,466 --> 00:56:27,345 Yeah, I said it. Why you approaching me? 1066 00:56:27,428 --> 00:56:28,512 I just didn't hear you. 1067 00:56:28,596 --> 00:56:31,641 I said what you looking at me like that for? Ain't nobody scared of you. 1068 00:56:31,724 --> 00:56:33,809 What'd you say before that? Don't let what? 1069 00:56:33,893 --> 00:56:36,896 Don't let chitlins, cornbread, ham hocks, 1070 00:56:36,979 --> 00:56:39,690 cheese sticks or none of that raise your kids. 1071 00:56:39,774 --> 00:56:41,025 That's what I said. 1072 00:56:41,108 --> 00:56:43,986 What, you got hostility? [stammers] What's happening? 1073 00:56:44,070 --> 00:56:46,906 This ain't your little brother no more, O. I'm a grown man. 1074 00:56:46,989 --> 00:56:49,200 You know, I don't get ass whoopings, I give 'em out. 1075 00:56:49,283 --> 00:56:52,870 - Mm-hm? - You a officer here in Mayberry. 1076 00:56:52,953 --> 00:56:55,956 Come on. What you carry? A flashlight and a baton? 1077 00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:58,793 A'ight, tell you what. Maybe... 1078 00:56:58,876 --> 00:57:02,213 If you a good old boy, I hire you as my security. 1079 00:57:02,296 --> 00:57:05,216 Yeah, I got the pull. I can do it. [chuckles] 1080 00:57:05,299 --> 00:57:07,718 - Big-ass... - [bangs] 1081 00:57:07,802 --> 00:57:08,803 [thuds] 1082 00:57:11,305 --> 00:57:14,266 Now you and Mama got matching titties. 1083 00:57:14,350 --> 00:57:16,227 Maybe y'all are related. 1084 00:57:24,985 --> 00:57:28,698 [toad croaking] 1085 00:57:29,699 --> 00:57:35,955 [Rick James' "Super Freak" playing on car radio] 1086 00:57:36,038 --> 00:57:38,832 [laughs] 1087 00:57:38,915 --> 00:57:42,711 You know, you should do a show about scrawny little brothers 1088 00:57:42,794 --> 00:57:45,839 that constantly get bitched. [laughs] 1089 00:57:45,922 --> 00:57:48,049 Look at your head! 1090 00:57:48,133 --> 00:57:51,886 Yeah, but thank you. But my next show gonna be about prison hoes... 1091 00:57:51,970 --> 00:57:52,929 Oh. 1092 00:57:53,012 --> 00:57:55,724 ...who mask conjugal visits as Bible readings. 1093 00:57:55,807 --> 00:57:56,641 Uh-uh. 1094 00:57:56,725 --> 00:58:01,438 Yeah, it's gonna be called "Bible Thumpers" or "Bible Humpers?" 1095 00:58:01,521 --> 00:58:05,024 You available? [laughs] 1096 00:58:05,108 --> 00:58:07,736 You got time? [laughs] 1097 00:58:07,819 --> 00:58:11,156 - [keys jangling] - What you feeling? 1098 00:58:11,239 --> 00:58:13,825 Oh. Oh, okay. 1099 00:58:13,908 --> 00:58:16,161 You better get your Butterfinger-eating ass back in the car. 1100 00:58:16,244 --> 00:58:18,663 I may not hit a woman, but I'll beat a bitch's ass. 1101 00:58:18,747 --> 00:58:19,914 - Is that what you gonna do? - Yeah. 1102 00:58:19,998 --> 00:58:20,832 - That's what you gonna do? - What? 1103 00:58:20,915 --> 00:58:22,625 - You gonna beat a bitch's ass? - [groans] 1104 00:58:22,709 --> 00:58:24,919 What bitch you gonna beat, 'Scoe? What bitch you gonna beat? 1105 00:58:25,003 --> 00:58:27,255 Maybe that's what it's like? Is that what it's like? 1106 00:58:27,338 --> 00:58:29,758 Hold up. What bitch you gonna beat, 'Scoe? 1107 00:58:29,841 --> 00:58:32,093 - You snapped my neck. - Look out! You didn't know. Golden glove. 1108 00:58:32,177 --> 00:58:34,763 Watch. I'm gonna give you a dirty, South-ass whipping, boy! 1109 00:58:34,846 --> 00:58:36,639 - [RJ groans]! - Come on, come on! 1110 00:58:36,723 --> 00:58:38,224 Bring it back! Bring it back, punk! 1111 00:58:38,308 --> 00:58:39,851 - Come on, bring it on back! - [screams] 1112 00:58:39,934 --> 00:58:41,186 - Oh! - [thuds] 1113 00:58:41,269 --> 00:58:43,480 [Betty] Roscoe, get your damn... Get off of me, 'Scoe! 1114 00:58:43,563 --> 00:58:45,774 [both grunting] 1115 00:58:45,857 --> 00:58:48,651 [Betty] That ain't weave, fool! Oh, you gonna be sorry! 1116 00:58:48,735 --> 00:58:50,487 - [bangs] - [RJ grunting] Oh! 1117 00:58:50,570 --> 00:58:51,571 - [thuds] - [Betty] Wait a minute! 1118 00:58:51,654 --> 00:58:53,406 [Betty] You done pulled out my damn tracks! 1119 00:58:53,490 --> 00:58:56,075 - [both grunt] - What you gonna do, RJ? [snaps] 1120 00:58:56,159 --> 00:58:58,495 I'm sick of you! I'm sick! Say you sorry. Say uncle. 1121 00:58:58,578 --> 00:59:01,122 - Say uncle! Say uncle! Say it! - [grunts] 1122 00:59:01,206 --> 00:59:04,374 Talk your shit now, you fake-ass Bruce Lee! 1123 00:59:04,458 --> 00:59:06,293 - [groans] - You wanna get up? You wanna get up? 1124 00:59:06,376 --> 00:59:09,838 Come on, come on. I done told you about your mouth! 1125 00:59:09,922 --> 00:59:12,508 [Betty] I am not a ho! 1126 00:59:12,591 --> 00:59:15,844 I am doing God's work! Say, "Praise the Lord!" 1127 00:59:15,928 --> 00:59:18,764 [RJ groaning] 1128 00:59:18,847 --> 00:59:23,352 Now I'm gonna tell you something. You'd better be glad I'm a good Christian. 1129 00:59:23,435 --> 00:59:26,605 Cause the next time, I might not be so merciful. 1130 00:59:26,688 --> 00:59:29,942 You done made me lose my protection from the Lord. 1131 00:59:30,025 --> 00:59:34,071 Father God, forgive him, for he know not what he do. 1132 00:59:34,154 --> 00:59:36,031 I'm gonna pray for you, Roscoe. 1133 00:59:37,533 --> 00:59:42,246 Thank you, I pray... [grunts] 1134 00:59:42,329 --> 00:59:44,206 [wheezes] 1135 00:59:48,210 --> 00:59:50,128 [RJ groaning] 1136 01:00:01,139 --> 01:00:02,558 [RJ] Hey, Lucinda. 1137 01:00:02,641 --> 01:00:05,102 Oh, my God! Roscoe, are you okay? 1138 01:00:06,061 --> 01:00:07,145 What do you mean? 1139 01:00:07,729 --> 01:00:10,232 Well, your face looks like you got run over by a tractor. 1140 01:00:10,816 --> 01:00:13,193 Really? I feel fine. 1141 01:00:13,277 --> 01:00:15,779 Well, it looks terrible. Here, sit. 1142 01:00:16,446 --> 01:00:20,033 [groans] 1143 01:00:20,117 --> 01:00:22,619 - [RJ chuckles] - Oh, my God. 1144 01:00:24,246 --> 01:00:26,665 - Here. - [RJ] Oh. 1145 01:00:26,748 --> 01:00:29,500 Ah! That feels good. 1146 01:00:30,668 --> 01:00:33,337 Good, good. 1147 01:00:33,421 --> 01:00:37,884 Hey. It might be a good idea to stop teasing everybody. 1148 01:00:37,967 --> 01:00:38,968 - [RJ scoffs] - [Lucinda laughs] 1149 01:00:39,051 --> 01:00:40,803 This is nothing. [chuckles] 1150 01:00:40,887 --> 01:00:44,223 - Why you trying to front? - I'm not fronting. 1151 01:00:44,307 --> 01:00:47,435 - [groans] Oh, oh. - See? See? 1152 01:00:47,518 --> 01:00:49,770 - [RJ sighs] - You know you're hurting. 1153 01:00:51,147 --> 01:00:53,524 The Roscoe Jenkins I knew would've owned up to it. 1154 01:00:55,026 --> 01:00:58,112 Well, this is RJ Stevens you're tending to now, girl. 1155 01:00:58,696 --> 01:01:02,491 Yeah, the new and improved... Roscoe 7.0. 1156 01:01:04,201 --> 01:01:09,165 I think Roscoe 1.0 was just fine. 1157 01:01:15,755 --> 01:01:17,131 Oh! 1158 01:01:17,214 --> 01:01:19,383 - [Papa J] I didn't know you're back. - We weren't doing nothing! 1159 01:01:22,678 --> 01:01:24,388 Nothing much, that is. 1160 01:01:27,475 --> 01:01:29,810 Well, good. 1161 01:01:29,894 --> 01:01:33,731 - Why don't you give me a hand, Roscoe? - Papa J, I thought you wanted me to help. 1162 01:01:33,814 --> 01:01:35,775 No, that's all right. Roscoe's got this. 1163 01:01:36,359 --> 01:01:40,112 Yeah, I got this. 1164 01:01:42,740 --> 01:01:43,574 [sighs] 1165 01:01:46,661 --> 01:01:48,871 [grunts] 1166 01:01:51,207 --> 01:01:52,833 [hammering] 1167 01:01:53,834 --> 01:01:55,669 [hammering] 1168 01:01:57,212 --> 01:01:58,296 [Papa J] Son... 1169 01:01:59,756 --> 01:02:01,758 You are ready to get married, aren't you? 1170 01:02:01,841 --> 01:02:04,761 [chuckles] Of course! 1171 01:02:04,844 --> 01:02:07,597 Yeah. Yeah. Why do you ask? 1172 01:02:08,515 --> 01:02:10,892 Well, if I didn't know any better, 1173 01:02:10,976 --> 01:02:13,395 I'd think there's something going on between you and Lucinda. 1174 01:02:13,478 --> 01:02:15,772 Oh, no! [chuckles] 1175 01:02:15,855 --> 01:02:18,358 I'm just, you know... 1176 01:02:18,441 --> 01:02:20,902 [stammers] We're just catching up. 1177 01:02:20,986 --> 01:02:24,823 Daddy, the wedding is gonna be hot. [chuckles] 1178 01:02:24,906 --> 01:02:27,409 Got the caterer, R. Kelly's singing. 1179 01:02:27,492 --> 01:02:31,496 Beyoncé is gonna choreograph the Electric Slide. 1180 01:02:31,579 --> 01:02:33,623 - [RJ] Um... - Roscoe... 1181 01:02:33,707 --> 01:02:35,500 I think you know what I'm saying. 1182 01:02:36,835 --> 01:02:39,379 The marriage isn't about the wedding day. 1183 01:02:39,462 --> 01:02:42,465 Your mama and I got married right out there in the front yard. 1184 01:02:42,549 --> 01:02:43,383 I know, but... 1185 01:02:44,217 --> 01:02:47,470 Well, Bianca wants a big wedding with all the trimmings. 1186 01:02:48,388 --> 01:02:49,848 Is that what you want? 1187 01:02:51,391 --> 01:02:55,061 [stammers] Yeah, I think. 1188 01:02:56,146 --> 01:02:58,356 I do. I do. 1189 01:02:58,440 --> 01:03:00,525 [chuckles] 1190 01:03:00,608 --> 01:03:03,528 - How does Jamaal feel about that? - [sighs] 1191 01:03:03,611 --> 01:03:06,448 Jamaal, he... Jamaal's cool, Daddy. 1192 01:03:07,032 --> 01:03:08,825 Be mindful of that boy. 1193 01:03:10,035 --> 01:03:12,412 He never sees his own mother. 1194 01:03:12,495 --> 01:03:14,998 From what he tells me, he doesn't see much of you, either. 1195 01:03:16,082 --> 01:03:17,459 I'm trying, Daddy. 1196 01:03:17,542 --> 01:03:19,961 All right, but the show keeps me so busy... 1197 01:03:20,045 --> 01:03:22,212 Oh! The show. 1198 01:03:22,296 --> 01:03:24,339 Team of Me. 1199 01:03:25,758 --> 01:03:28,135 I never quite understood that. 1200 01:03:28,218 --> 01:03:31,138 Well, it's just... It's just a saying, you know? 1201 01:03:31,221 --> 01:03:33,599 "Protect yourself. Be your own man." 1202 01:03:34,183 --> 01:03:35,976 Well, that's fine, son, but... 1203 01:03:36,060 --> 01:03:39,938 there are times you gotta depend on others, family and friends. 1204 01:03:40,022 --> 01:03:42,858 I mean, you never learned anything like that around here. 1205 01:03:42,941 --> 01:03:45,319 And that's certainly not something you teach a child. 1206 01:03:50,199 --> 01:03:52,534 Some kids learn it on their own, Daddy. 1207 01:04:12,554 --> 01:04:14,681 [snoring] 1208 01:04:14,765 --> 01:04:16,892 [birds chirping] 1209 01:04:16,975 --> 01:04:19,103 [RJ snoring] 1210 01:04:19,561 --> 01:04:20,562 - Honey! - [grunts] 1211 01:04:20,646 --> 01:04:25,067 I've been busy with a personal project all morning and I'm exhausted, so... 1212 01:04:25,651 --> 01:04:27,820 Be a dear and walk Fifi for me? 1213 01:04:27,903 --> 01:04:32,032 Come on, baby. Let Feef run around and enjoy nature. 1214 01:04:32,116 --> 01:04:34,535 - [Fifi pants] - I was hoping to get a little nap. 1215 01:04:34,618 --> 01:04:35,619 Aw. 1216 01:04:36,745 --> 01:04:38,872 My little man is tired. 1217 01:04:39,706 --> 01:04:41,792 Well, I promise 1218 01:04:41,875 --> 01:04:46,546 I'll do any little thing you want if you do this little thing for me. 1219 01:04:46,629 --> 01:04:48,297 [Bianca] Mm? 1220 01:04:48,381 --> 01:04:51,801 Plus, I want to show you my little project. 1221 01:04:51,884 --> 01:04:53,636 [buzzes] 1222 01:04:55,388 --> 01:04:56,722 What project? 1223 01:04:59,976 --> 01:05:01,519 Damn! [gasps] 1224 01:05:01,602 --> 01:05:03,354 [yelps] 1225 01:05:04,355 --> 01:05:06,858 - Are those my initials? - [Bianca] Mm-hm. 1226 01:05:06,941 --> 01:05:07,859 [buzzing] 1227 01:05:07,942 --> 01:05:10,027 I told you it was yours. 1228 01:05:10,111 --> 01:05:13,739 [chuckles] You're a hell of an artist, baby. 1229 01:05:15,867 --> 01:05:17,577 Come on, Feef! 1230 01:05:22,540 --> 01:05:24,500 Come on, Feef, go pee. 1231 01:05:25,001 --> 01:05:27,420 [rattles] 1232 01:05:27,503 --> 01:05:28,671 [hisses] 1233 01:05:28,754 --> 01:05:31,424 Oh, shit! Snake! Feef! Come on, Feef! 1234 01:05:31,507 --> 01:05:33,009 - [Fifi whimpering] - Run, Fifi! 1235 01:05:33,593 --> 01:05:35,303 [RJ] Run! Come on! 1236 01:05:35,386 --> 01:05:38,431 - [grunting] Come on! Hey! Lucinda... - Hey, what's the matter? 1237 01:05:38,514 --> 01:05:41,767 Don't go down there. Fifi's cornered by this big-ass poisonous snake. 1238 01:05:41,851 --> 01:05:44,937 - And you left her? - No! Lucinda! Save yourself! 1239 01:05:47,565 --> 01:05:51,611 - [Lucinda screaming] - Oh! You see? I'm sorry, Fifi! 1240 01:05:52,195 --> 01:05:55,198 I ain't sucking out no... No poison! 1241 01:05:55,781 --> 01:05:59,493 You okay, girl? Yeah? You just got a little scare, huh? 1242 01:05:59,577 --> 01:06:01,996 [chuckles] Fifi... 1243 01:06:02,079 --> 01:06:03,706 It's okay. It's all right. 1244 01:06:03,789 --> 01:06:05,541 - She all right? - Yeah. 1245 01:06:05,625 --> 01:06:06,834 - Oh. - Here you go. 1246 01:06:06,918 --> 01:06:09,003 - See? It was just a little milk snake. - Ah! 1247 01:06:09,086 --> 01:06:11,839 [sighs] Now, that wasn't the snake I saw. 1248 01:06:11,923 --> 01:06:16,051 - It was an anaconda or a python. - Well, we don't have those down here. 1249 01:06:17,093 --> 01:06:18,762 - For real? - Uh-huh. 1250 01:06:19,679 --> 01:06:20,847 There you go. 1251 01:06:22,474 --> 01:06:24,684 [sighs] You want to take a walk? 1252 01:06:26,770 --> 01:06:27,812 Sure. 1253 01:06:29,481 --> 01:06:31,691 [RJ] You out here running off that red velvet cake, huh? 1254 01:06:31,775 --> 01:06:33,526 - [Lucinda] I deserve some cake. - [RJ] Yeah, no... 1255 01:06:35,237 --> 01:06:38,949 [RJ] Oh, come on, you heard the stories. Hell, you witnessed a bunch. 1256 01:06:39,032 --> 01:06:41,785 Everybody did everything better than me. 1257 01:06:41,868 --> 01:06:43,578 So, I found something I'm good at. 1258 01:06:44,162 --> 01:06:48,291 I get in front of that audience and they feel me. 1259 01:06:48,375 --> 01:06:49,834 More than anyone here ever did. 1260 01:06:49,918 --> 01:06:53,296 Please, Roscoe. What family doesn't mess with one another? 1261 01:06:53,380 --> 01:06:56,049 I mean, I got teased to no end about my skinny legs. 1262 01:06:56,132 --> 01:06:58,343 Yeah, well, you do have some slim-jims. 1263 01:06:58,426 --> 01:07:00,470 Shut up! You could pick your teeth with those legs. 1264 01:07:00,553 --> 01:07:02,639 - [RJ chuckles] - [laughs] Shut up. 1265 01:07:02,722 --> 01:07:07,060 See? You can dish it out, boy. Especially when it comes to Clyde. 1266 01:07:07,644 --> 01:07:09,980 Clyde. [scoffs] 1267 01:07:10,063 --> 01:07:13,066 Clyde's big-headed ass needs to be knocked off his high horse sometimes. 1268 01:07:13,149 --> 01:07:15,777 Why are you two always digging at each other? 1269 01:07:15,860 --> 01:07:20,031 Because Clyde is dirty, and will use any underhanded trick to win. 1270 01:07:20,115 --> 01:07:22,242 Aren't you exaggerating just a little? 1271 01:07:22,325 --> 01:07:23,743 Uh, no. 1272 01:07:24,661 --> 01:07:26,913 And what was all that "you stole what was mine" business? 1273 01:07:26,997 --> 01:07:30,875 - Mm? - At the picnic. What did he steal? 1274 01:07:34,713 --> 01:07:35,672 [sighs] 1275 01:07:35,755 --> 01:07:37,424 A great opportunity. 1276 01:07:42,344 --> 01:07:46,390 Well, if it was that great, why can't you create another one? 1277 01:07:49,935 --> 01:07:51,645 Maybe I will. 1278 01:07:53,397 --> 01:07:54,857 Maybe you should. 1279 01:07:56,692 --> 01:08:00,654 [Reggie] Well, well, well. Here y'all are again! 1280 01:08:01,780 --> 01:08:02,740 [Reggie] Uh-huh. 1281 01:08:03,365 --> 01:08:07,786 Caught you, didn't I? Mamma gonna get ya. Uh-huh. 1282 01:08:08,370 --> 01:08:10,497 [Reggie] This raises some eyebrows. 1283 01:08:10,581 --> 01:08:13,917 Well, sing like a canary, Reggie. Whistle. 1284 01:08:14,001 --> 01:08:16,295 [sings] All that with the birds. 1285 01:08:16,378 --> 01:08:19,465 Harmonize with 'em. But you're not getting the plasma. 1286 01:08:20,132 --> 01:08:21,759 I was walking the dog. 1287 01:08:22,718 --> 01:08:25,721 How's that? Bucky's with us. 1288 01:08:25,804 --> 01:08:31,393 - I'm talking about Fiona. Where is Feef? - Oh, I think she's down by the gully. 1289 01:08:32,394 --> 01:08:34,480 - Where's Bucky? - Down by the gully. 1290 01:08:34,563 --> 01:08:35,481 Oh. 1291 01:08:37,358 --> 01:08:39,651 - [Reggie] He's gonna tear it up. - [Bucky howling] 1292 01:08:39,735 --> 01:08:42,488 - Buck! - [Bucky howling] 1293 01:08:42,571 --> 01:08:44,615 - Bucky, get your ass off! - [thuds] 1294 01:08:44,698 --> 01:08:46,075 [whines] 1295 01:08:46,158 --> 01:08:47,701 Oh, my God. 1296 01:08:47,785 --> 01:08:49,870 - [exclaiming] Whoa! - [yelps] 1297 01:08:49,953 --> 01:08:52,456 - She is so working him. - [Fifi yelping] 1298 01:08:53,040 --> 01:08:56,085 - [Bucky groaning] - [Fifi yelps] 1299 01:08:56,168 --> 01:08:59,213 Don't be surprised if he starts barking in tongues. 1300 01:08:59,296 --> 01:09:01,507 [groans] 1301 01:09:01,590 --> 01:09:03,509 - [Fifi yelps] - [thuds] 1302 01:09:06,469 --> 01:09:09,263 - [sighs] - Bucky done turned the bitch out. 1303 01:09:09,347 --> 01:09:11,849 - [Bucky groaning] - [sighs] 1304 01:09:12,850 --> 01:09:16,354 [pants] 1305 01:09:16,437 --> 01:09:19,690 [whines] 1306 01:09:24,445 --> 01:09:28,199 - Reggie, not a word. - I got you. 1307 01:09:28,282 --> 01:09:30,284 Is that plasma TV under warranty? 1308 01:09:32,453 --> 01:09:33,913 Mm-hm. 1309 01:09:33,996 --> 01:09:37,583 I'm a steel trap, player. That dog gonna need counseling. 1310 01:09:42,046 --> 01:09:45,925 - You gonna be all right? - Maybe she won't notice. 1311 01:09:48,886 --> 01:09:49,887 [RJ exhaling] 1312 01:09:49,971 --> 01:09:52,557 Oh, baby. [chuckles] 1313 01:09:52,640 --> 01:09:56,936 Me and Fifi had so much fun out there, we completely lost track of time. 1314 01:09:57,019 --> 01:09:58,020 Yeah... 1315 01:09:58,104 --> 01:10:01,315 Daddy loves himself some Fifi. Isn't that right, Fifi? 1316 01:10:01,399 --> 01:10:03,943 [RJ] Daddy loves his little Fifi! Yeah! 1317 01:10:04,026 --> 01:10:06,487 Oh, we was running all over the place, baby. [chuckles] 1318 01:10:06,571 --> 01:10:08,823 Yeah, she may need a bath. 1319 01:10:08,906 --> 01:10:11,742 She got dirty. Real dirty. 1320 01:10:12,326 --> 01:10:13,411 Now see here, buster. 1321 01:10:13,995 --> 01:10:17,707 Your alliance is with me, not the prom queen. 1322 01:10:17,790 --> 01:10:22,670 Oh, come on, baby. There's no other alliance. All right? 1323 01:10:23,671 --> 01:10:26,382 Now, how about you show me that little project? 1324 01:10:26,966 --> 01:10:30,635 - I shaved off my little project. - Why'd you do that? 1325 01:10:30,719 --> 01:10:33,138 If I discover there's a mutiny afoot, 1326 01:10:33,221 --> 01:10:36,099 I'm gonna shave off your little project. Understand? 1327 01:10:40,061 --> 01:10:41,354 Damn! 1328 01:10:42,397 --> 01:10:43,899 - Damn! - Damn! 1329 01:10:43,982 --> 01:10:46,526 [man on TV] One timer! Kaberle. 1330 01:10:46,610 --> 01:10:49,779 - Goal! - [all laugh] 1331 01:10:49,863 --> 01:10:53,783 Dang, you got game, nephew. It's all right. 1332 01:10:53,867 --> 01:10:55,702 Hey, Dad! 1333 01:10:55,785 --> 01:10:58,371 Roscoe Malley! What's up, man? 1334 01:10:58,955 --> 01:11:03,335 So I heard you been running around with my girl again. Come on, man. 1335 01:11:03,418 --> 01:11:06,213 Let's play the game. Me and Junior take on you and Jamaal. 1336 01:11:06,296 --> 01:11:08,757 - Yeah. - I don't play children's games. 1337 01:11:08,840 --> 01:11:10,592 Oh, is that right? 1338 01:11:11,176 --> 01:11:14,179 Then what's your poison, brother? [chuckles] 1339 01:11:14,262 --> 01:11:16,223 - [rattling] - [Clyde] Ya hear that, though. Huh? 1340 01:11:16,306 --> 01:11:21,269 You like that, eh? Yeah, I've been dying to play a little click-clack. 1341 01:11:22,270 --> 01:11:24,814 Sure you want to take it there, Clyde? 1342 01:11:24,898 --> 01:11:26,399 Cause I don't play for fun. 1343 01:11:27,192 --> 01:11:29,611 Ain't no fun losing money. 1344 01:11:29,694 --> 01:11:32,531 Then you're about to have a bad time. 1345 01:11:32,614 --> 01:11:35,075 - [both exclaim] - Seven! 1346 01:11:35,158 --> 01:11:36,952 Oh, that's gonna be all day right there! 1347 01:11:37,035 --> 01:11:38,954 - [RJ] Can you handle it? - Money maker! Money maker! 1348 01:11:39,037 --> 01:11:40,705 Daddy needs a new pair of gators. 1349 01:11:40,789 --> 01:11:42,499 Uh-uh. Watch this right there. 1350 01:11:42,582 --> 01:11:44,459 Talking about shake 'em up, shake 'em up, wake 'em. 1351 01:11:44,543 --> 01:11:46,711 - Oh! - Yeah, Dad! 1352 01:11:46,795 --> 01:11:48,296 Daddy, yes! 1353 01:11:48,380 --> 01:11:50,674 You know what, man? I admire you. 1354 01:11:50,757 --> 01:11:52,175 - Yeah? - I admire you, Roscoe. 1355 01:11:52,259 --> 01:11:55,095 I mean, do you still keep trying. 1356 01:11:55,178 --> 01:11:59,098 You know, cause even when I lose, I win. 1357 01:11:59,181 --> 01:12:00,558 - Ooh. - Ooh. 1358 01:12:00,641 --> 01:12:02,893 Well, then this must feel like the championship, 1359 01:12:02,977 --> 01:12:04,228 cause you're losing the grip. 1360 01:12:04,979 --> 01:12:06,438 Bitch! [laughs] 1361 01:12:06,522 --> 01:12:08,899 [all laugh] 1362 01:12:08,983 --> 01:12:11,151 - Right there. Right there. - Come on, baby, eat for Mama. 1363 01:12:12,903 --> 01:12:14,488 Uh, Binata? 1364 01:12:14,572 --> 01:12:18,784 You're not listening. Now, I told you to take that dog out of my kitchen. 1365 01:12:18,867 --> 01:12:21,912 It just ain't sanitary! What's wrong with people? 1366 01:12:21,996 --> 01:12:25,874 Bringing damn dogs up in folks' kitchen? Don't make no damn sense. 1367 01:12:26,584 --> 01:12:28,210 Oh! 1368 01:12:28,294 --> 01:12:31,755 That ain't nothing, you ain't even slick with yours, so that's the problem. 1369 01:12:31,839 --> 01:12:35,843 Everybody see what you're doing, man. But she mine, bro. 1370 01:12:35,926 --> 01:12:38,178 - Yeah? - Well, you might want to tell her that, 1371 01:12:38,262 --> 01:12:39,888 cause she's feeling a brother. 1372 01:12:39,972 --> 01:12:42,683 Seven again! [laughs] 1373 01:12:42,766 --> 01:12:45,019 All right, grease is hot, I need that fish. 1374 01:12:45,102 --> 01:12:46,562 - [Ruthie] Here you go, baby. - Thank you. 1375 01:12:46,645 --> 01:12:47,646 Mm-hm. 1376 01:12:47,730 --> 01:12:50,524 Hmm. It's a little sweet, but it's delicious. 1377 01:12:50,608 --> 01:12:54,653 Yes! And that wine of yours, baby, set it right off! 1378 01:12:54,737 --> 01:12:57,114 - The '67 Margaux? - Yeah! 1379 01:12:57,197 --> 01:13:00,659 - That's a $600 bottle! - And worth every penny! [clinks] 1380 01:13:00,743 --> 01:13:03,537 - Oh! - [grunting] Ugh! 1381 01:13:04,538 --> 01:13:05,623 Seven again! 1382 01:13:05,706 --> 01:13:09,835 Oh! Somebody stop it! 1383 01:13:09,918 --> 01:13:11,420 [laughs] 1384 01:13:11,503 --> 01:13:13,047 - Come on, roll the dice. - [RJ laughs] 1385 01:13:13,130 --> 01:13:14,632 I get it. That's mine, that's mine. 1386 01:13:14,715 --> 01:13:16,467 Pass on that ass. 1387 01:13:16,550 --> 01:13:17,843 - Oh! - [all] Oh! 1388 01:13:17,926 --> 01:13:19,762 - Could it be? - No, no. 1389 01:13:19,845 --> 01:13:21,846 No, no. I call gator on that right there. 1390 01:13:21,929 --> 01:13:23,389 Nigga, this ain't Monopoly. 1391 01:13:23,473 --> 01:13:26,059 Hey, hey, man! Roll again, bro. 1392 01:13:28,061 --> 01:13:31,064 Clyde, you better un-ass me before you find yourself a pinky short. 1393 01:13:31,147 --> 01:13:34,067 You better roll again before you find yourself an artery short. 1394 01:13:35,360 --> 01:13:36,653 - [RJ growling] - [thuds] 1395 01:13:36,736 --> 01:13:40,114 You brought it on yourself! You brought it on yourself, Clyde! 1396 01:13:40,198 --> 01:13:42,241 - Let's go get some fish. - [Callie] Okay. Come on, Jamaal. 1397 01:13:42,325 --> 01:13:44,661 Is this what you wanted, Clyde? That's what you want. 1398 01:13:44,744 --> 01:13:46,162 - [both grunt] - [RJ] Oh! 1399 01:13:46,245 --> 01:13:48,414 That's right! That's right! That's Junior Varsity right there, bro! 1400 01:13:48,498 --> 01:13:51,584 [both scream] 1401 01:13:52,627 --> 01:13:54,253 - [RJ] Feel that? - That's your ass right there! 1402 01:13:59,509 --> 01:14:00,718 [Callie] Hey, stop. 1403 01:14:00,802 --> 01:14:03,012 Y'all better stop all that running through my kitchen! 1404 01:14:03,096 --> 01:14:04,764 - [RJ] Got you! Yeah! - [Clyde grunts] 1405 01:14:04,847 --> 01:14:08,059 Oh! You broke Daddy's table! We worked hard on this! 1406 01:14:08,142 --> 01:14:09,352 [screams] 1407 01:14:09,435 --> 01:14:11,354 - [thuds] - That's cause you fixed it! 1408 01:14:11,437 --> 01:14:12,563 [grunts] 1409 01:14:14,732 --> 01:14:18,152 [women laugh] 1410 01:14:18,236 --> 01:14:20,613 [indistinct chatter] 1411 01:14:20,697 --> 01:14:22,907 [Amy] I said, why are you drinking when you're pregnant? 1412 01:14:22,990 --> 01:14:25,535 - They said I could have a glass of wine. - Really? 1413 01:14:25,618 --> 01:14:28,037 They didn't say how many times you could refill it, though, baby. 1414 01:14:28,121 --> 01:14:29,247 I want to be pregnant! 1415 01:14:29,330 --> 01:14:32,250 - How about another one? - Let's do it, Balolo! 1416 01:14:32,333 --> 01:14:34,168 - [RJ] Clyde-o-mania, baby! - [groans] 1417 01:14:34,252 --> 01:14:36,796 - [thuds] - [groaning] Oh! 1418 01:14:36,879 --> 01:14:40,133 You ended up with a big dog now, boy. You ought to check my dental records. 1419 01:14:40,216 --> 01:14:44,137 [both scream and grunt] 1420 01:14:44,721 --> 01:14:46,556 Lord, these fools been playing dice. 1421 01:14:46,639 --> 01:14:48,181 - [indistinct chatter] - [Mama J] Stop them. 1422 01:14:48,265 --> 01:14:49,182 Hey, knock it off! 1423 01:14:49,266 --> 01:14:52,102 Ladies, get the tartar sauce and the hot sauce, 1424 01:14:52,185 --> 01:14:54,813 cause the Jenkins family is about to throw down! 1425 01:14:54,896 --> 01:14:57,941 - [bangs] - [Clyde and RJ grunting] 1426 01:14:58,024 --> 01:15:00,819 - [both grunt] - [all clamoring] 1427 01:15:00,902 --> 01:15:02,195 [shouting] Man, what are y'all doing? 1428 01:15:02,279 --> 01:15:04,573 - Stop that! - [women clamoring] 1429 01:15:04,656 --> 01:15:06,491 - [women scream] - [Otis] RJ, no! 1430 01:15:06,575 --> 01:15:08,118 [both grunt] 1431 01:15:08,201 --> 01:15:10,787 - [Lucinda] RJ no! - It's hot! It's hot! 1432 01:15:10,871 --> 01:15:12,873 - [women scream] - [thuds] 1433 01:15:13,915 --> 01:15:17,252 - [Otis] Oh, hell no! - [Ruthie] Oh, my God. 1434 01:15:18,587 --> 01:15:20,297 [Amy] Are you okay? 1435 01:15:22,507 --> 01:15:26,178 Oh, my God. 1436 01:15:26,762 --> 01:15:28,430 - He started it. - He started it. 1437 01:15:28,513 --> 01:15:31,433 [Reggie] What they heading for now? What they heading for now... 1438 01:15:31,516 --> 01:15:32,517 Damn! 1439 01:15:33,810 --> 01:15:35,187 Poor Mama. 1440 01:15:36,021 --> 01:15:39,232 You should have had more prenatal care. Look at your kids. 1441 01:15:41,151 --> 01:15:42,819 I'm sorry. 1442 01:15:43,320 --> 01:15:45,447 [whimpers] 1443 01:15:45,530 --> 01:15:48,366 Baby, I'm sorry. 1444 01:15:48,450 --> 01:15:49,951 - It was an accident. - Silence. 1445 01:15:50,035 --> 01:15:52,996 Shower, strategy. That's all I need right now. 1446 01:15:53,079 --> 01:15:54,956 [knocking on door] [door opens] 1447 01:15:55,040 --> 01:15:58,001 Oh! Boy, the shower is all yours. 1448 01:15:58,084 --> 01:16:00,629 [Reggie laughing] 1449 01:16:00,712 --> 01:16:01,755 [Fifi whimpering] 1450 01:16:01,838 --> 01:16:04,132 - You used all my shit! - Yeah, what? 1451 01:16:04,216 --> 01:16:06,301 - And you're wearing my robe? - What? 1452 01:16:06,384 --> 01:16:09,095 - Now, you little... - Bianca, how's Fiona doing? 1453 01:16:09,679 --> 01:16:12,307 - She still spooked by that snake? - What snake? 1454 01:16:13,307 --> 01:16:15,643 [Reggie] The snake Lucinda saved Fifi from. 1455 01:16:15,726 --> 01:16:17,269 [shushes] 1456 01:16:17,353 --> 01:16:20,773 I mean, she seems pretty relaxed. That's probably cause... 1457 01:16:20,856 --> 01:16:22,483 - Satellite! - Huh, 'Scoe? 1458 01:16:22,566 --> 01:16:26,320 Satellite, pay-per-view, premium channels, sports channels, 1459 01:16:26,403 --> 01:16:28,614 platinum titty channels... All that, man. 1460 01:16:28,697 --> 01:16:31,283 - Playboy channels? - Yeah, butt-naked channels. 1461 01:16:31,367 --> 01:16:33,410 - You like butt-naked? - Oh, I got to have it. 1462 01:16:33,494 --> 01:16:35,704 You like when they butt-naked, showing all ass? 1463 01:16:36,956 --> 01:16:41,126 - You know it. Gospel channels? - Yeah, you... Gospel, all that! 1464 01:16:41,210 --> 01:16:43,087 - Telemundo? - [RJ] You like Telemundo? 1465 01:16:43,170 --> 01:16:46,173 - I like Tele... I like Spanish. - [speaks indistinctly] All that! 1466 01:16:46,257 --> 01:16:47,967 All the... [sings tango music] 1467 01:16:50,094 --> 01:16:51,720 My man. Peace. 1468 01:16:52,888 --> 01:16:54,431 [snarls] 1469 01:16:58,018 --> 01:17:01,897 I don't know who you are anymore, Roscoe Jenkins. 1470 01:17:01,981 --> 01:17:04,149 Baby, it's me. 1471 01:17:04,733 --> 01:17:06,610 It's RJ. 1472 01:17:06,694 --> 01:17:11,991 Are you really willing to put your career, your future in jeopardy over a crush? 1473 01:17:12,074 --> 01:17:15,286 Career? Baby, we're getting married. 1474 01:17:15,369 --> 01:17:19,665 Get your priorities in order and decide what and who you really want. 1475 01:17:21,375 --> 01:17:23,502 Let that simmer while you sleep on the couch tonight. 1476 01:17:23,586 --> 01:17:27,298 - [Bianca] We're going to take a shower. - [chuckles] 1477 01:17:27,798 --> 01:17:31,010 [water splashes] 1478 01:17:51,821 --> 01:17:53,990 - Reggie! - Ugh! Hell, no! 1479 01:17:54,073 --> 01:17:56,826 - Get your nasty ass outta here! - I didn't know that was you. 1480 01:17:56,910 --> 01:17:59,829 You knew I was in here! You is a nasty common freak! 1481 01:17:59,913 --> 01:18:02,957 There is a naked linebacker in our shower right now. 1482 01:18:03,041 --> 01:18:05,084 You done brought that little white gal up in here, 1483 01:18:05,168 --> 01:18:07,045 now you trying to sneak around and see some black meat? 1484 01:18:07,128 --> 01:18:09,297 Girl, ain't no. I didn't try to come here and look at you! 1485 01:18:09,380 --> 01:18:11,049 Well, then hand me my feminine wash! 1486 01:18:11,132 --> 01:18:13,676 I can see why you can't keep a man now. 1487 01:18:13,760 --> 01:18:17,263 You got to lay off them Milky Ways and Doritos and tortillo chips. 1488 01:18:17,347 --> 01:18:18,973 Your mother shouldn't have did them goddamn drugs 1489 01:18:19,057 --> 01:18:21,309 when she was pregnant with you! That's what's wrong with your black ass! 1490 01:18:21,392 --> 01:18:23,937 God, your titties are huge, Betty. 1491 01:18:24,020 --> 01:18:25,104 Look, I'm gonna tell Daddy. 1492 01:18:25,188 --> 01:18:27,231 I'm gonna tell my daddy that you are in here 1493 01:18:27,315 --> 01:18:29,108 trying to see my treats, Reggie. 1494 01:18:29,192 --> 01:18:31,027 You're gonna be lying if you tell him that! 1495 01:18:31,110 --> 01:18:33,196 - Then what was you doing in here? - I thought that... 1496 01:18:33,279 --> 01:18:35,698 Can I give you this bubblegum and get on out of here? 1497 01:18:35,782 --> 01:18:37,825 What? You wanted Chick-fil-A, that's what you got. 1498 01:18:37,909 --> 01:18:41,412 I'm Burger King. I'm a Double Whopper. You want to see this dark meat? 1499 01:18:41,496 --> 01:18:43,873 I don't play that foolishness. You're sick. 1500 01:18:43,957 --> 01:18:50,004 I do want to see the black meat, but I don't want to see a bundle of it. 1501 01:18:50,088 --> 01:18:53,341 Get out of here, you sick nasty bastard! 1502 01:18:55,468 --> 01:18:57,595 [RJ] She gonna put me out of my room. 1503 01:18:57,679 --> 01:19:02,517 She's a survivor. I'm a survivor! Kiribati, my ass! 1504 01:19:04,102 --> 01:19:07,104 Good night, vegan! [laughs] 1505 01:19:07,688 --> 01:19:12,025 Finally, peace at last. 1506 01:19:12,526 --> 01:19:15,070 [snores] 1507 01:19:18,323 --> 01:19:19,491 Bucky! 1508 01:19:27,582 --> 01:19:30,711 You stinky dog! Bucky! 1509 01:19:30,794 --> 01:19:32,254 Oh, hell no! 1510 01:19:32,337 --> 01:19:35,048 - [splashes] - [screams] 1511 01:19:37,384 --> 01:19:40,345 He done pissed in my eyes! 1512 01:19:40,429 --> 01:19:42,681 It stinks! My eyes! It burns! 1513 01:19:42,764 --> 01:19:45,475 [screaming] Oh, Lord! Oh! Oh... 1514 01:19:45,559 --> 01:19:47,894 - [groans] - [thuds] 1515 01:19:48,520 --> 01:19:49,813 [groans] 1516 01:19:50,313 --> 01:19:52,315 It stink. 1517 01:19:52,399 --> 01:19:56,194 It stink. My eyes are burning. It got in my mouth! 1518 01:19:56,778 --> 01:19:58,321 [RJ] They're burning! 1519 01:19:58,405 --> 01:20:00,657 Where did I go wrong with that boy? 1520 01:20:02,451 --> 01:20:03,410 [RJ] Mama! 1521 01:20:03,493 --> 01:20:06,538 Mama! Mama! 1522 01:20:06,621 --> 01:20:08,331 Lord have mercy. 1523 01:20:08,415 --> 01:20:10,876 - [RJ] Mama! - [Papa J grunts] 1524 01:20:13,628 --> 01:20:15,589 [spraying] 1525 01:20:15,672 --> 01:20:17,299 - [whispering] I don't know what that is. - [spraying] 1526 01:20:17,382 --> 01:20:19,509 [woman whispering] Hell, no, that ain't me. 1527 01:20:19,593 --> 01:20:24,431 - What the... - [spraying] 1528 01:20:24,514 --> 01:20:27,350 [sprays] 1529 01:20:27,434 --> 01:20:30,520 Come on, baby brother. Ease up, man. You got my eyes tearing. 1530 01:20:30,604 --> 01:20:33,105 - My skin is all itchy. - [sprays] 1531 01:20:33,189 --> 01:20:34,482 [whispering] Don't do that, man! 1532 01:20:34,565 --> 01:20:36,692 Smells like garbage truck juice out here. 1533 01:20:36,776 --> 01:20:39,320 - [Papa J] Today... - [spray whooshes] 1534 01:20:39,403 --> 01:20:45,076 ...you all continue the Dry Springs obstacle course tradition. 1535 01:20:45,159 --> 01:20:50,915 So get out there and display that Jenkins family athletic prowess! 1536 01:20:51,415 --> 01:20:54,126 And, no matter what... 1537 01:20:54,210 --> 01:20:59,006 - Have fun! - [all cheer] 1538 01:21:01,717 --> 01:21:03,677 Good luck, young man. Make me proud. 1539 01:21:03,761 --> 01:21:06,555 - Win something. Have fun. - Go on, have a good time. 1540 01:21:08,641 --> 01:21:12,144 Jamaal, nobody remembers who came in second, okay? 1541 01:21:12,228 --> 01:21:15,773 So you gotta get pumped, right? Loosen up. 1542 01:21:16,774 --> 01:21:19,735 Loosen up your muscles. Come on, loosen up! Come on, come on! 1543 01:21:19,819 --> 01:21:23,823 - Win! Win! We're winners. We're winners. - Ease up now, Kiribati. 1544 01:21:23,906 --> 01:21:26,742 Jamaal, go. This ain't none of your business, Clyde. 1545 01:21:26,826 --> 01:21:29,203 Look, come on, man. This is just kids having fun. 1546 01:21:29,286 --> 01:21:31,872 It ain't no fun getting beat. You should know that, Cadillac man. 1547 01:21:31,956 --> 01:21:35,501 Hey, that was one time! Even a blind squirrel can find a nut. 1548 01:21:35,584 --> 01:21:37,086 Who are you calling a squirrel? 1549 01:21:37,169 --> 01:21:39,004 "Who are you calling a squirrel?" 1550 01:21:39,088 --> 01:21:43,425 Roscoe, that's who! A blind, stink-ass squirrel. 1551 01:21:43,509 --> 01:21:46,011 - And you the nut. Koo-koo! - [Bianca gasps] 1552 01:21:46,095 --> 01:21:47,847 Hey, leave my lady out of this. 1553 01:21:47,930 --> 01:21:49,890 I know you're not calling my victory a fluke. 1554 01:21:49,974 --> 01:21:51,976 Oh, fluke, luck, one in a million shot, yeah. 1555 01:21:52,059 --> 01:21:54,854 Well, bring it on, Clyde. We can do this right here, right now. 1556 01:21:54,937 --> 01:21:57,772 [all clamoring] 1557 01:21:57,856 --> 01:22:00,066 He's always been a loser. He's always gonna be a loser. 1558 01:22:00,150 --> 01:22:02,402 [clamoring] 1559 01:22:02,485 --> 01:22:05,864 Hey, Daddy! Daddy, you hear these fools? I'm gonna arrest them! 1560 01:22:05,947 --> 01:22:07,907 [arguing] 1561 01:22:07,991 --> 01:22:09,868 [Papa J shouts] 1562 01:22:10,451 --> 01:22:12,954 You two been at this for 20 years. 1563 01:22:13,037 --> 01:22:16,249 Go ahead. Knock yourselves out. Starting line, ten minutes! 1564 01:22:16,332 --> 01:22:19,085 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah, Daddy! Yeah! 1565 01:22:19,169 --> 01:22:21,963 Starting line, ten minutes, Clyde! Ten minutes. Ten minutes. 1566 01:22:22,046 --> 01:22:24,215 - Ten minutes, Clyde! - [Bianca] Get him! 1567 01:22:24,299 --> 01:22:26,009 Ten minutes to countdown, baby! 1568 01:22:26,092 --> 01:22:28,678 - Get it. Get it. - Gunfight at the O.K. Corral! 1569 01:22:28,761 --> 01:22:31,181 [Reggie] Oh, shoot, it's the Negro Olympics! 1570 01:22:33,349 --> 01:22:34,642 [breathes out] 1571 01:22:49,824 --> 01:22:54,454 - Daddy, are you sure about this? - Focus, son. Concentrate. 1572 01:22:54,954 --> 01:22:59,125 Cut me in or cut it out! Clyde is favored to do the job! 1573 01:22:59,209 --> 01:23:00,251 [Reggie] Good luck, 'Scoe. 1574 01:23:00,335 --> 01:23:01,920 - [Betty laughing] - That's right. Who gonna bet? 1575 01:23:02,003 --> 01:23:05,632 Y'all better strap yourselves in, cause this here's gonna be funny! 1576 01:23:05,715 --> 01:23:07,717 Hey, Reggie, let me get some of that action! 1577 01:23:07,800 --> 01:23:10,762 I got a pulled hamstring for Clyde and a back spasm for Roscoe. 1578 01:23:10,845 --> 01:23:12,055 [Betty laughing] 1579 01:23:12,138 --> 01:23:15,391 RJ's in top shape. Your man? No shape. 1580 01:23:15,975 --> 01:23:19,395 - Clyde is not my man. We are just... - Just friends. 1581 01:23:19,479 --> 01:23:20,521 Yeah. Like you and RJ? 1582 01:23:21,981 --> 01:23:25,651 - What are you talking about? - I've been watching you. 1583 01:23:25,734 --> 01:23:29,071 Trying to win favor with Jamaal. Realizing what you missed out on. 1584 01:23:29,154 --> 01:23:31,907 It's pathetic. And you're too late. 1585 01:23:31,990 --> 01:23:35,369 Cause there are no second chances for washed-up prom queens. 1586 01:23:35,452 --> 01:23:38,163 - Oh. [shushes] Now, that was painful. - Sorry. Sorry. 1587 01:23:38,247 --> 01:23:39,706 You a bad bitch. You bad. 1588 01:23:39,790 --> 01:23:41,917 [Lucinda] A bad bitch, Betty? Please, okay? 1589 01:23:42,000 --> 01:23:44,878 She is a fake celebrity, all right? 1590 01:23:44,962 --> 01:23:48,131 Her only claim to fame is trading her panties for peanut butter. 1591 01:23:48,215 --> 01:23:50,592 That's some nasty shit there. 1592 01:23:50,676 --> 01:23:55,514 News flash, honey. Those panties went for 20 grand online. 1593 01:23:55,597 --> 01:23:57,724 - Wait a minute, 20 grand for your panties? - [Bianca] Yes. 1594 01:23:57,808 --> 01:23:59,601 Well, wait, I got some panties, okay? 1595 01:23:59,685 --> 01:24:02,604 I got the good panties, I got the thong panties, 1596 01:24:02,688 --> 01:24:04,147 I got the period panties. They might... 1597 01:24:04,231 --> 01:24:06,942 Betty, I got a news flash for you. 1598 01:24:08,819 --> 01:24:10,946 - Bucky boned Fifi. - Oh, Lord! 1599 01:24:11,029 --> 01:24:12,114 - Well? - Did he kill her? 1600 01:24:13,198 --> 01:24:14,157 She was on top. 1601 01:24:14,241 --> 01:24:15,951 - [gasps] - [Betty] The Pomegramian? 1602 01:24:16,034 --> 01:24:18,245 - [Lucinda] Now that is a bad bitch. - [Betty] Oh, my God. 1603 01:24:18,328 --> 01:24:20,664 - Fifi! - Your dog's a whore! 1604 01:24:20,747 --> 01:24:23,875 All right. On your mark! 1605 01:24:25,544 --> 01:24:26,420 Get set! 1606 01:24:27,587 --> 01:24:30,215 - [gunshot] - [all cheering] 1607 01:24:30,299 --> 01:24:31,800 Run, baby! 1608 01:24:32,926 --> 01:24:34,803 - [thumps] - [thuds] Ugh. 1609 01:24:34,886 --> 01:24:36,388 - Get out the way! - Oh. 1610 01:24:36,471 --> 01:24:37,931 [Reggie] What is wrong with them? 1611 01:24:39,850 --> 01:24:41,310 [grunts] 1612 01:24:41,393 --> 01:24:42,477 [grunts] 1613 01:24:42,561 --> 01:24:45,147 [all grunting] 1614 01:24:45,230 --> 01:24:46,982 [all shouting] 1615 01:24:47,065 --> 01:24:48,357 [Mama J] Go! 1616 01:24:49,567 --> 01:24:51,569 [Clyde] Oh, get back! Don't want nothing. 1617 01:24:51,652 --> 01:24:54,405 - Hey, get back, sucka. - [man] Watch out! Hey! Get off me! 1618 01:24:54,488 --> 01:24:56,240 I got him! I'm going! 1619 01:24:59,285 --> 01:25:01,996 Oh, no! Share that! Share that. 1620 01:25:02,079 --> 01:25:05,291 - [RJ screams] - [Clyde] Time out! 1621 01:25:05,374 --> 01:25:07,293 [tree branch snaps] 1622 01:25:07,376 --> 01:25:09,712 - [exclaiming] Oh! - [laughs] 1623 01:25:12,757 --> 01:25:16,093 - Redemption! Redemption! - Oh, no! No! 1624 01:25:16,177 --> 01:25:17,970 Forget it! 1625 01:25:18,054 --> 01:25:20,681 - You gotta go, Rasta boy! - [grunts] 1626 01:25:20,765 --> 01:25:21,682 [laughs] 1627 01:25:21,766 --> 01:25:22,933 - No! - Hey! 1628 01:25:23,517 --> 01:25:25,436 - [grunting] Oh yeah. - [thuds] 1629 01:25:27,730 --> 01:25:30,775 - [grunts] - Oh no! Uh-uh. 1630 01:25:32,777 --> 01:25:33,944 Cannonball! 1631 01:25:34,904 --> 01:25:35,946 [Clyde screams] 1632 01:25:36,655 --> 01:25:37,615 Oh, shit! 1633 01:25:38,199 --> 01:25:39,950 - [thuds] - [RJ grunts] 1634 01:25:42,286 --> 01:25:43,788 [grunts] 1635 01:25:43,871 --> 01:25:45,414 Hit the floor, baby! G.I. Joe! 1636 01:25:45,498 --> 01:25:46,624 [screams] 1637 01:25:47,333 --> 01:25:49,710 Navy Seal! Navy Seal! 1638 01:25:49,794 --> 01:25:52,171 Slip and slide, Clyde! 1639 01:25:55,341 --> 01:25:58,761 Try the South Beach Diet, fat-ass! Yeah! 1640 01:25:58,844 --> 01:26:01,597 - [grunts] - [laughs] 1641 01:26:02,723 --> 01:26:05,976 - [screams] - Come on, baby! 1642 01:26:06,060 --> 01:26:08,521 - No, you don't! - Hey! 1643 01:26:09,105 --> 01:26:10,356 Oh, hell no! No! 1644 01:26:10,439 --> 01:26:13,234 - [screams] - [laughing triumphantly] 1645 01:26:13,317 --> 01:26:14,526 - [thuds] - Ow! 1646 01:26:14,609 --> 01:26:15,819 [crowd exclaiming] 1647 01:26:15,902 --> 01:26:18,405 [squeals] 1648 01:26:19,280 --> 01:26:20,990 Man, I felt that in my stomach. 1649 01:26:21,074 --> 01:26:22,283 [grunts] 1650 01:26:23,451 --> 01:26:25,036 [grunts] 1651 01:26:25,120 --> 01:26:28,957 - [Otis] Come on, baby! Let's go! - No! No! Hold on! 1652 01:26:29,040 --> 01:26:31,543 [screams painfully] 1653 01:26:32,502 --> 01:26:34,087 Son, no! Wait! 1654 01:26:34,170 --> 01:26:35,463 [screams] 1655 01:26:35,547 --> 01:26:37,048 [Jamaal] Sorry, Dad! 1656 01:26:37,132 --> 01:26:39,008 You! You wait! You... 1657 01:26:39,092 --> 01:26:41,553 [screams painfully] 1658 01:26:41,636 --> 01:26:43,596 Hold on, baby! Hold on! 1659 01:26:43,680 --> 01:26:45,265 - [Betty] Go, Clyde, go! - [cloth ripping] 1660 01:26:47,350 --> 01:26:48,685 Oh! 1661 01:26:48,768 --> 01:26:51,104 [laughs] 1662 01:26:51,187 --> 01:26:54,190 - That's all right, baby! - [Reggie] Look at them stretch marks! 1663 01:26:54,274 --> 01:26:56,109 - Let's go, Jamaal! You can do it! - [Otis] Go! 1664 01:26:56,192 --> 01:26:57,777 Whoo! Yeah! 1665 01:26:58,361 --> 01:26:59,821 [screaming] No! 1666 01:27:00,405 --> 01:27:02,866 - [Clyde] It's your ass! - Oh boy! No! 1667 01:27:03,450 --> 01:27:04,742 [Clyde] What the hell. 1668 01:27:04,826 --> 01:27:07,120 I got you now. See you at the finish line, boy. 1669 01:27:07,203 --> 01:27:09,622 - No! - Get up, baby! Get up! 1670 01:27:09,706 --> 01:27:11,332 [grunts] 1671 01:27:13,334 --> 01:27:14,419 - Yeah! - Yeah. 1672 01:27:14,502 --> 01:27:16,379 You see that? Upper body strength. 1673 01:27:16,463 --> 01:27:18,131 That's what being in the gym will do for you! 1674 01:27:18,214 --> 01:27:20,467 Well, I'm a power runner. True warrior! 1675 01:27:20,550 --> 01:27:23,303 - Man! I ain't never scared! - Yeah, me, neither! 1676 01:27:23,386 --> 01:27:28,349 [both scream] 1677 01:27:28,433 --> 01:27:30,310 I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! 1678 01:27:32,020 --> 01:27:33,980 [RJ] Mama! Mama! 1679 01:27:34,063 --> 01:27:35,899 [Clyde] I'm gonna die! [thuds] 1680 01:27:35,982 --> 01:27:38,902 - [grunting] - [groans] 1681 01:27:38,985 --> 01:27:40,152 [exclaiming] 1682 01:27:41,278 --> 01:27:42,696 [Betty] Go, Clyde, go! 1683 01:27:46,200 --> 01:27:47,826 Go, RJ! Get him! 1684 01:27:55,959 --> 01:27:57,961 - Help me, Dad! - Hey, come on! 1685 01:27:58,045 --> 01:27:59,421 - [Jamaal] Dad! - Dig in, come on! 1686 01:27:59,505 --> 01:28:02,549 - I can't! Help! Dad! - [RJ] Come on, son! 1687 01:28:03,509 --> 01:28:05,677 - Come on, Clyde, you can do it. - [Jamaal grunts] 1688 01:28:06,428 --> 01:28:08,597 - [grunting] Oh! - [Clyde] Come on. 1689 01:28:09,056 --> 01:28:12,935 Come on. Come on. Come on, son! Go! 1690 01:28:13,018 --> 01:28:15,729 - [Jamaal] I'm trying! - Dig in, son! 1691 01:28:15,812 --> 01:28:17,731 [RJ grunting] 1692 01:28:17,814 --> 01:28:19,733 Hurry up! Dig in! Go! 1693 01:28:19,816 --> 01:28:21,276 Leave him, baby, leave him! 1694 01:28:21,360 --> 01:28:24,446 [Bianca] Don't let Clyde beat you! Don't let him win! 1695 01:28:24,530 --> 01:28:26,406 - [Jamaal groans] - [Bianca] Win, RJ, win! 1696 01:28:26,490 --> 01:28:27,407 - What? - What? 1697 01:28:27,491 --> 01:28:29,201 - [Bianca] Go, go, go! - [grunts] 1698 01:28:29,284 --> 01:28:30,786 - [grunts] - [pants] 1699 01:28:30,869 --> 01:28:33,789 [grunting] Don't give up, son! Don't give up! 1700 01:28:33,872 --> 01:28:35,707 [Bianca] Go, baby, go! 1701 01:28:35,791 --> 01:28:37,751 [grunts] 1702 01:28:37,834 --> 01:28:38,669 Come on, baby! Go! 1703 01:28:38,752 --> 01:28:40,504 [groans] 1704 01:28:40,587 --> 01:28:42,839 - [thud] - [screams] 1705 01:28:43,465 --> 01:28:44,466 - [grunts] - Watch out! 1706 01:28:44,550 --> 01:28:46,051 - [grunts] - [thuds] 1707 01:28:46,134 --> 01:28:47,636 Whoa, whoa, whoa, baby. 1708 01:28:47,719 --> 01:28:49,054 - No... - No, that's all right. 1709 01:28:49,638 --> 01:28:51,473 This is just a mess. 1710 01:28:51,557 --> 01:28:52,599 [grunting] Oh, yeah, sucker! 1711 01:28:52,683 --> 01:28:54,851 [laughs] 1712 01:28:54,935 --> 01:28:57,771 Oh, no! Hell, no! Hell, no! 1713 01:29:00,440 --> 01:29:02,234 [grunts] 1714 01:29:03,485 --> 01:29:05,945 - Oh, no, you don't! No, you don't! - [crowd cheering] 1715 01:29:06,028 --> 01:29:09,657 - [screams] - [crowd cheering] 1716 01:29:09,740 --> 01:29:12,785 [both screaming] 1717 01:29:12,868 --> 01:29:17,206 [both screaming] 1718 01:29:17,999 --> 01:29:21,043 [exclaiming] Yeah! Yes! Yeah! 1719 01:29:21,711 --> 01:29:23,045 Welcome to the top, winner! 1720 01:29:24,255 --> 01:29:26,841 Oh! Yeah! [sighs] 1721 01:29:26,924 --> 01:29:29,969 Give it up, Clyde. I still got it. 1722 01:29:30,052 --> 01:29:33,848 This is gonna haunt your dreams for the next 20 years! Yeah! 1723 01:29:33,931 --> 01:29:36,892 - Loser! - Callie! 1724 01:29:36,976 --> 01:29:38,978 Built for comfort, not for speed. 1725 01:29:39,061 --> 01:29:43,524 Hey, good save, Steroid Stan! Good save, boy. 1726 01:29:43,608 --> 01:29:46,402 But you know what? Too bad this ain't a team competition. 1727 01:29:46,485 --> 01:29:48,279 You know why? Cause I'm the leader! 1728 01:29:48,863 --> 01:29:51,616 Yes! Captain of the Team of Me! 1729 01:29:51,699 --> 01:29:55,786 Just me! Just me, baby! Just me! 1730 01:29:56,370 --> 01:29:57,580 [RJ sighing] Yeah! Whoo! 1731 01:29:59,415 --> 01:30:01,208 [RJ panting] 1732 01:30:01,792 --> 01:30:02,960 Come here, son. 1733 01:30:03,836 --> 01:30:04,920 No, thanks. 1734 01:30:06,255 --> 01:30:08,382 Jamaal! Jamaal! 1735 01:30:10,551 --> 01:30:12,428 Jamaal! Jamaal! 1736 01:30:12,511 --> 01:30:14,680 What in God's name is wrong with you? 1737 01:30:14,764 --> 01:30:18,893 [sighs] What? He challenged me, Daddy. So I stepped to the plate. 1738 01:30:18,976 --> 01:30:23,105 - What was I supposed to do, back down? - Hey, don't use that tone with me! 1739 01:30:23,189 --> 01:30:27,234 - Show some damn respect! - Where's my respect, Daddy? Damn! 1740 01:30:27,318 --> 01:30:29,528 You've never given me credit for nothing I done! 1741 01:30:29,612 --> 01:30:32,989 Credit for what? Winning a child's race? 1742 01:30:33,073 --> 01:30:37,077 Buying some fancy TV? Or that bullshit show of yours? 1743 01:30:37,159 --> 01:30:40,246 Yes! Yes, Daddy! Yes! 1744 01:30:40,330 --> 01:30:43,165 Give me some credit! Show me some damn credit! 1745 01:30:43,750 --> 01:30:45,335 Then I feel very sorry for you. 1746 01:30:47,003 --> 01:30:49,464 So, Clyde gets off easy again. 1747 01:30:51,633 --> 01:30:53,426 It wasn't just me out there, Daddy. 1748 01:30:56,262 --> 01:31:00,058 I know he lost his father, but why did I have to lose mine too? 1749 01:31:00,141 --> 01:31:01,183 Why, Daddy? 1750 01:31:09,150 --> 01:31:13,822 Well, now I see why you stayed away for nine years. 1751 01:31:33,842 --> 01:31:36,302 Hey. Hey, Roscoe. 1752 01:31:36,886 --> 01:31:38,513 Look, man... 1753 01:31:38,596 --> 01:31:40,807 I never tried to take your place. 1754 01:31:40,890 --> 01:31:42,851 I was just trying to fit in. 1755 01:31:42,934 --> 01:31:46,020 Cause even though we're cousins, you're my brother, man. 1756 01:31:57,157 --> 01:31:59,575 Oh, now you're Mr. Innocent? Please! 1757 01:32:00,200 --> 01:32:02,619 Don't fall for it, honey. He's just trying to suck you in. 1758 01:32:02,703 --> 01:32:05,581 Oh, look, heifer, your narrow ass about to get sucked in 1759 01:32:05,664 --> 01:32:07,332 - if something... - Hey, don't do this. You got a case. 1760 01:32:07,416 --> 01:32:10,377 - I will cut you. - You got a case pending. 1761 01:32:10,461 --> 01:32:11,920 [RJ] You know what? We're going. 1762 01:32:12,004 --> 01:32:13,464 - We're going. - I'm not afraid of her. 1763 01:32:13,547 --> 01:32:15,966 You need to be afraid of her. You don't watch Wild Kingdom? 1764 01:32:16,049 --> 01:32:17,885 You ain't never seen a lion attack a gazelle? 1765 01:32:18,635 --> 01:32:21,054 She about to smack the "Cover Girl" off your face. 1766 01:32:21,138 --> 01:32:24,349 - You better get up out of here. - [Clyde] 'Scoe. 'Scoe. 1767 01:32:24,433 --> 01:32:26,643 - Hey, look, man... - [Betty] Let him go. Let him go. 1768 01:32:27,644 --> 01:32:28,645 Get off of me, Reggie! 1769 01:32:29,229 --> 01:32:31,774 - Come on, baby. - [Betty] I can see your spine. 1770 01:32:31,857 --> 01:32:33,859 [Betty] Look at that snake! 1771 01:32:33,942 --> 01:32:38,155 It was so good to see you, Jamaal. Yeah. 1772 01:32:38,739 --> 01:32:42,034 Don't you forget to stay in touch with your grandma and grandpa, you hear? 1773 01:32:42,117 --> 01:32:45,871 I will. Thanks, Mama Jenkins. 1774 01:32:46,997 --> 01:32:49,416 Well, here's something for the road. 1775 01:32:49,875 --> 01:32:52,293 - Meatloaf, your favorite. - Thanks, Mama. 1776 01:32:52,377 --> 01:32:55,547 Oh, I just hate to see you go. 1777 01:32:55,631 --> 01:32:59,468 But I understand. Lord have mercy, I understand. 1778 01:33:01,845 --> 01:33:05,182 Just don't let it be another nine years, okay? 1779 01:33:06,642 --> 01:33:08,560 - Promise? - Yeah. 1780 01:33:15,359 --> 01:33:16,944 We love you. 1781 01:33:17,027 --> 01:33:18,862 [sniffs] 1782 01:33:19,530 --> 01:33:21,490 I love you too, Mama. 1783 01:33:25,159 --> 01:33:27,829 [car revving] 1784 01:33:38,422 --> 01:33:42,510 [Bianca] Honey, don't be sad. I'm sorry things didn't work out. 1785 01:33:43,386 --> 01:33:45,763 I promise we'll fix this together. 1786 01:33:46,722 --> 01:33:50,142 - I hope so, baby. - We'll come up with a new plan. 1787 01:33:50,935 --> 01:33:53,563 Yeah, we have more time to work on the speech. 1788 01:33:53,646 --> 01:33:58,901 We'll film the banquet in LA, hire actors. It'll look better. 1789 01:33:58,985 --> 01:34:02,613 - Hire actors? To play my family? - Honey... 1790 01:34:03,447 --> 01:34:07,618 We're getting married and forming a powerful merger. 1791 01:34:08,536 --> 01:34:10,621 Where does your family fit into that? 1792 01:34:11,247 --> 01:34:12,832 I guess they don't. 1793 01:34:12,915 --> 01:34:15,167 - Dad, are you serious? - Jamaal! 1794 01:34:15,960 --> 01:34:19,547 Haven't you realized by now who your father's become? Hmm? 1795 01:34:20,214 --> 01:34:21,966 It's all about the Team of Me. 1796 01:34:22,466 --> 01:34:25,136 This is Team Stevens, and you need to get on board. 1797 01:34:25,219 --> 01:34:26,429 I'm a Jenkins. 1798 01:34:28,598 --> 01:34:29,807 RJ, please talk to your son. 1799 01:34:32,894 --> 01:34:33,853 [sighs] 1800 01:34:36,689 --> 01:34:38,149 She's right, Jamaal. 1801 01:34:38,232 --> 01:34:41,401 - We gotta move forward, all right? - Mm-hm. 1802 01:34:41,485 --> 01:34:43,529 You think just because you bonded with everybody, 1803 01:34:43,613 --> 01:34:46,532 I'm gonna send you down here for summers and Christmases... 1804 01:34:46,616 --> 01:34:47,658 - [scoffs] - [RJ chuckles] 1805 01:34:47,742 --> 01:34:49,701 ...so you can be influenced by these people? 1806 01:34:49,784 --> 01:34:51,703 - But... But, Dad! - No buts, Jamaal. 1807 01:34:51,786 --> 01:34:54,497 In fact, you know, let's not even invite them to the wedding. 1808 01:34:54,581 --> 01:34:59,377 [gasps] Oh, my God! I'm so glad you said that! 1809 01:34:59,461 --> 01:35:01,963 I've been thinking that ever since I met Betty. [sighs] 1810 01:35:02,047 --> 01:35:05,467 [scoffs] I don't blame you. Bitch ain't got no class. 1811 01:35:05,550 --> 01:35:07,135 You can say that again. 1812 01:35:10,305 --> 01:35:11,640 [chuckles] 1813 01:35:11,723 --> 01:35:13,725 [Bianca] No class. [chuckles] 1814 01:35:13,808 --> 01:35:16,019 We can say that about a few people in your family. 1815 01:35:16,853 --> 01:35:20,231 [Bianca chuckling] Right, baby? Right? 1816 01:35:24,152 --> 01:35:26,112 [Bianca] Honey, you are so doing the right thing. 1817 01:35:27,197 --> 01:35:30,700 And making me so hot in the process. 1818 01:35:30,784 --> 01:35:31,701 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 1819 01:35:31,785 --> 01:35:35,121 Well, prepare to cool off, cause I'm done with you. 1820 01:35:35,205 --> 01:35:36,623 You crazy-ass bitch! 1821 01:35:37,207 --> 01:35:40,168 - Ugh. - You know what? Thank you, Bianca. 1822 01:35:40,251 --> 01:35:41,795 Thank you so much 1823 01:35:41,878 --> 01:35:45,799 for letting me finally see you for the arrogant, sex-crazed, 1824 01:35:45,882 --> 01:35:50,053 pretentious, fake-ass celebrity wannabe that you are. 1825 01:35:50,136 --> 01:35:52,138 Thank you, Bianca. Thank you. 1826 01:35:52,222 --> 01:35:56,768 [scoffs] Oh, well, you're so welcome, Roscoe! 1827 01:35:56,851 --> 01:35:59,270 I knew it. You can't handle me. 1828 01:35:59,354 --> 01:36:02,857 You're not man enough. You don't have the balls! 1829 01:36:03,692 --> 01:36:06,653 King Kong don't have the balls! Bounce! 1830 01:36:07,779 --> 01:36:10,532 You just signed your career death certificate. 1831 01:36:10,615 --> 01:36:12,867 Our alliance is officially over! 1832 01:36:12,951 --> 01:36:14,661 And so are you. Come on, Fiona. 1833 01:36:15,536 --> 01:36:16,620 [whimpers] 1834 01:36:16,704 --> 01:36:18,455 Come on, Fifi. Come to Mommy. 1835 01:36:18,539 --> 01:36:20,207 - [barks] - [RJ scoffs] 1836 01:36:20,290 --> 01:36:23,919 It looks like your alliance is over, and you've been voted off the island. 1837 01:36:24,962 --> 01:36:28,382 Bianca, the tribe has spoken. Bounce! 1838 01:36:28,465 --> 01:36:29,925 [Fiona barking] 1839 01:36:30,926 --> 01:36:33,012 [screams] 1840 01:36:33,554 --> 01:36:37,182 - Dad, you're the man! - I told you who the boss was. 1841 01:36:39,351 --> 01:36:40,352 Let's go. 1842 01:36:41,603 --> 01:36:43,230 Wait, my bags! 1843 01:36:44,982 --> 01:36:47,735 - [strap loosens] - [thuds] 1844 01:36:53,991 --> 01:36:56,285 - [RJ] I love you, son. - [Jamaal] I love you too, Dad. 1845 01:36:56,368 --> 01:36:57,619 [RJ] Let's go home. 1846 01:36:57,703 --> 01:36:59,955 [people applauding] 1847 01:37:01,749 --> 01:37:03,208 Mama said, 1848 01:37:04,084 --> 01:37:05,461 "Girl, it ain't right 1849 01:37:05,543 --> 01:37:09,048 to throw hot grits on a man when you have a disagreement." 1850 01:37:09,631 --> 01:37:12,885 Sound advice, real good advice, but did I listen? 1851 01:37:13,886 --> 01:37:16,138 No. Old Betty had to do it her way. 1852 01:37:16,221 --> 01:37:19,725 And that was my second husband. God knows I didn't mean to burn him. 1853 01:37:19,808 --> 01:37:23,437 But my third husband, Buck, baby... Buck was good to me! 1854 01:37:23,520 --> 01:37:24,813 And any time you get somebody 1855 01:37:24,897 --> 01:37:26,732 that's good to you like that, you love 'em. 1856 01:37:26,815 --> 01:37:29,860 Big black Buck had the keloid hanging from the ear. 1857 01:37:29,943 --> 01:37:30,861 [exclaims in disgust] 1858 01:37:30,944 --> 01:37:32,821 - Looked like he had a leather hearing aid. - Stop! 1859 01:37:32,905 --> 01:37:34,782 Daddy, I know you didn't like Buck a lot, 1860 01:37:34,865 --> 01:37:37,409 but Buck was a good man when he got out of jail. 1861 01:37:37,493 --> 01:37:40,370 I'm gonna tell you something. He did everything he said he was gonna do. 1862 01:37:40,454 --> 01:37:45,208 And do you know, Buck was the only man, the only man that could pick me up? 1863 01:37:45,291 --> 01:37:49,253 Baby, y'all don't know what it's like for a man to scoop you up like that. 1864 01:37:49,337 --> 01:37:51,130 - [Otis] Betty. Betty... - I'm trying to tell 'em! 1865 01:37:51,214 --> 01:37:52,423 - Scoop you like... - Betty. 1866 01:37:52,507 --> 01:37:55,009 - Get off of me! I'm not finished. - [Otis] Betty. 1867 01:37:55,093 --> 01:37:56,886 - [Betty] You a hater! - I ain't no hater. 1868 01:37:56,969 --> 01:37:59,388 - We only got five hours to be here. - Shut up! 1869 01:38:00,597 --> 01:38:04,102 [applauding] Thank you, Betty! Thank you! Yeah! 1870 01:38:04,185 --> 01:38:06,854 [crowd applauding] 1871 01:38:06,938 --> 01:38:10,233 And now for our next testimonial. It'll come from Clyde. 1872 01:38:10,316 --> 01:38:15,988 [crowd applauding] 1873 01:38:16,613 --> 01:38:19,784 All right, how's everybody doing? Ain't God good? 1874 01:38:19,867 --> 01:38:21,661 - [all] Yeah. - All the time. 1875 01:38:21,744 --> 01:38:24,330 [Clyde] It is a pleasure and a privilege to be here 1876 01:38:24,413 --> 01:38:28,126 for Papa J and Mama J's 50th anniversary. 1877 01:38:28,209 --> 01:38:31,254 Lord, growing up in this Jenkins household was something else. 1878 01:38:31,337 --> 01:38:33,673 And Papa J is a strong man. 1879 01:38:33,756 --> 01:38:36,801 Well, this the kind of person, when he say he'll slap the black off you, 1880 01:38:36,884 --> 01:38:38,678 I mean the black really will come off. 1881 01:38:38,761 --> 01:38:41,305 I woke up light-skinned at least three times in my life. 1882 01:38:41,389 --> 01:38:43,182 [all laugh] 1883 01:38:43,266 --> 01:38:44,851 [Clyde] Yeah, I got it all back. 1884 01:38:45,309 --> 01:38:47,728 You all right? You barely ate. 1885 01:38:48,354 --> 01:38:51,107 [Clyde] But you know, working in his hardware store... 1886 01:38:51,190 --> 01:38:55,862 - I just wish Roscoe were here. - Roscoe made his choice. 1887 01:38:57,697 --> 01:38:59,656 You didn't give him much of one. 1888 01:39:00,783 --> 01:39:04,287 What was I supposed to do? Be disrespected in my own home? 1889 01:39:05,538 --> 01:39:07,038 Be his father. 1890 01:39:09,124 --> 01:39:12,335 Giving him your name doesn't make him you, Roscoe. 1891 01:39:13,628 --> 01:39:17,591 It doesn't make him Betty or Otis or even Clyde. 1892 01:39:18,175 --> 01:39:21,636 He's Roscoe Junior. RJ. 1893 01:39:22,220 --> 01:39:26,057 And for a boy who didn't feel the support of his family, 1894 01:39:27,058 --> 01:39:29,561 he's doing quite well for himself. 1895 01:39:30,145 --> 01:39:34,107 [Clyde] Sleeping in the bottom bunk bed, you know, under RJ, and then, 1896 01:39:34,191 --> 01:39:36,610 I was nervous cause he would pee in the bed. 1897 01:39:36,692 --> 01:39:38,653 - [crowd laughs] - And that would, you know, that would... 1898 01:39:38,737 --> 01:39:40,572 I would have some scary nights sometime. 1899 01:39:40,655 --> 01:39:43,241 [Clyde] You know, it's hard sleeping with a raincoat on, you know. 1900 01:39:43,325 --> 01:39:46,494 - [crowd laughs] - And, you know, and... 1901 01:39:46,578 --> 01:39:48,914 And I tried to explain to them that, you know, 1902 01:39:48,997 --> 01:39:51,707 that's Roscoe the one that's peeing in the bed, not me. 1903 01:39:52,375 --> 01:39:55,337 And, uh, he... [sobs] 1904 01:39:56,963 --> 01:39:59,799 [sobbing] 1905 01:39:59,883 --> 01:40:03,678 [Clyde] You know, just the way they took me in was so gracious. 1906 01:40:03,762 --> 01:40:06,973 They didn't have to do that. I thank you. [sniffs 1907 01:40:07,057 --> 01:40:08,516 [Clyde] I thank y'all and... 1908 01:40:08,600 --> 01:40:11,019 Because I don't know where I would be right now if... 1909 01:40:11,102 --> 01:40:13,729 - [sobbing loudly] - [mic feedback] 1910 01:40:13,813 --> 01:40:16,233 Nigga, what is you crying for? 1911 01:40:16,316 --> 01:40:19,903 Big old Sugar Bear-looking-ass boy. Sitting up there crying. 1912 01:40:19,986 --> 01:40:22,030 He's still wearing the pajamas with the feet in 'em. 1913 01:40:22,113 --> 01:40:24,449 [sobs] 1914 01:40:24,532 --> 01:40:27,118 Wow, I've never seen Clyde cry before. 1915 01:40:27,202 --> 01:40:30,372 [crowd murmuring] 1916 01:40:30,455 --> 01:40:33,916 [Clyde] Ain't nobody crying. I'm just cleansing. 1917 01:40:34,500 --> 01:40:36,585 No, those some real tears right there. 1918 01:40:37,544 --> 01:40:38,671 I know. 1919 01:40:39,838 --> 01:40:43,801 I've cried more than a newborn baby getting his ass popped. 1920 01:40:43,884 --> 01:40:45,636 [all laugh] 1921 01:40:45,719 --> 01:40:46,679 Hey, guys. 1922 01:40:46,761 --> 01:40:48,931 - [RJ] I've been beat up... - Hey, Jamaal! 1923 01:40:49,014 --> 01:40:52,601 [RJ]...insulted, laughed at... 1924 01:40:53,310 --> 01:40:56,605 - A lot. - [all laughing] 1925 01:40:56,689 --> 01:40:58,107 Hey, you're laughing already. 1926 01:41:00,276 --> 01:41:04,405 I lost more games and competitions to Clyde than I can remember. 1927 01:41:05,239 --> 01:41:08,826 Oh, 3,459 and counting. 1928 01:41:08,909 --> 01:41:11,453 [all laugh] 1929 01:41:11,537 --> 01:41:12,955 Thank you, Clyde. 1930 01:41:16,083 --> 01:41:17,792 I thought I was a loser. 1931 01:41:18,585 --> 01:41:23,632 So I went away, and transformed myself into what I thought was a winner. 1932 01:41:26,385 --> 01:41:27,720 But being around y'all... 1933 01:41:28,470 --> 01:41:31,640 is a 24-7... 1934 01:41:32,599 --> 01:41:34,018 reality check. 1935 01:41:34,101 --> 01:41:36,061 Y'all rough on a brother. 1936 01:41:37,021 --> 01:41:41,734 [scoffs] The clothes, the car, the Survivor... 1937 01:41:41,816 --> 01:41:44,486 [all laugh] 1938 01:41:45,404 --> 01:41:47,031 [sighs] Y'all pull no punches. 1939 01:41:47,114 --> 01:41:49,616 - You know that's right! - [all laugh] 1940 01:41:49,700 --> 01:41:53,245 Betty, you got a hell of a right hand. 1941 01:41:53,329 --> 01:41:56,790 That's no joke. And O, you got a hell of a left hand. 1942 01:41:56,874 --> 01:41:59,459 - [all laughing] - [RJ] That's right. 1943 01:41:59,542 --> 01:42:01,461 But look, I... 1944 01:42:01,544 --> 01:42:06,299 I want to thank you, all of you, my family. 1945 01:42:08,760 --> 01:42:11,721 Thank you for making me a better man. 1946 01:42:13,514 --> 01:42:15,475 For giving me strength to... 1947 01:42:15,558 --> 01:42:19,270 To withstand anything this world throws at me. 1948 01:42:20,396 --> 01:42:21,981 For unconditional love, 1949 01:42:24,108 --> 01:42:26,277 and a place to call "home." 1950 01:42:26,860 --> 01:42:31,115 [sobs] Mm-mm. I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna cry. 1951 01:42:33,701 --> 01:42:36,245 Happy anniversary, Mommy, Daddy. 1952 01:42:37,330 --> 01:42:38,331 I love you. 1953 01:42:38,414 --> 01:42:41,834 [crowd applauding] 1954 01:42:49,842 --> 01:42:50,843 I'm so proud of you. 1955 01:42:53,221 --> 01:42:56,307 [sobs] I know. We all need love. 1956 01:42:57,850 --> 01:43:00,353 Yeah, come on, Clyde. We gonna let them have this moment. 1957 01:43:00,436 --> 01:43:02,313 - I just want a hug, O. - I know. Come over here... 1958 01:43:02,397 --> 01:43:04,023 Son... 1959 01:43:05,149 --> 01:43:09,654 If I ever drove you away, if I ever made you feel unworthy, 1960 01:43:09,737 --> 01:43:11,114 I'm sorry. 1961 01:43:12,156 --> 01:43:15,159 I love you. Glad to have you back. 1962 01:43:15,243 --> 01:43:17,745 And those words you just said, that's the best gift 1963 01:43:17,829 --> 01:43:21,332 I've ever received, RJ Stevens. 1964 01:43:21,416 --> 01:43:23,418 Well, it's from the heart, Daddy. 1965 01:43:24,168 --> 01:43:25,794 And the name is Jenkins. 1966 01:43:27,087 --> 01:43:29,673 Roscoe Steven Jenkins. 1967 01:43:30,382 --> 01:43:31,800 Just like my daddy. 1968 01:43:34,219 --> 01:43:36,096 [crowd applauds] 1969 01:43:38,515 --> 01:43:40,559 - Reggie, come here. - What the hell is wrong with you? 1970 01:43:40,642 --> 01:43:44,062 What the hell has gotten into you? 1971 01:43:46,606 --> 01:43:49,401 [Whitney Houston's "Saving All My Love For You" playing] 1972 01:43:55,282 --> 01:43:56,158 Go get her, son. 1973 01:44:14,009 --> 01:44:16,052 - [RJ] Lucinda? - Yes? 1974 01:44:16,969 --> 01:44:20,265 I waited 20 years to create this opportunity. 1975 01:44:21,850 --> 01:44:23,101 Would you dance with me? 1976 01:44:25,770 --> 01:44:27,314 I'd love to. 1977 01:44:33,028 --> 01:44:35,447 Lucinda, I'm happy for you. 1978 01:44:36,406 --> 01:44:39,659 Hey! Betty, come on, let's get out here and cut a rug, girl. 1979 01:44:39,743 --> 01:44:44,164 Negro, we're cousins. That's nasty! So desperate. That's a damn shame. 1980 01:44:45,123 --> 01:44:48,168 You gonna play me for him? He got on an ankle bracelet! 1981 01:44:53,756 --> 01:44:55,508 [clears throat] 1982 01:44:56,592 --> 01:44:58,636 [laughs] 1983 01:45:10,397 --> 01:45:11,607 [mouths] Thank you. 1984 01:45:11,690 --> 01:45:12,942 [squeals] 1985 01:45:16,445 --> 01:45:18,531 [laughs] 1986 01:45:44,598 --> 01:45:46,057 [Papa J] Now, that's a good picture. 1987 01:45:46,141 --> 01:45:48,519 - [Mama J] Oh, look at that. - Yeah, this should be good. 1988 01:45:48,602 --> 01:45:50,479 [indistinct chatter] 1989 01:45:56,610 --> 01:45:58,821 - [Otis] That looks good, Reggie. - [Ruthie] That's a blue bonnet, baby. 1990 01:45:58,904 --> 01:46:01,824 - Pow! - That boy crazy right there, isn't he? 1991 01:46:03,242 --> 01:46:07,246 - We do have one hell of a family. - We sure do, Daddy. 1992 01:46:07,329 --> 01:46:10,874 - Where are those two anyway? - Oh, Ma, you know where they are. 1993 01:46:10,958 --> 01:46:12,126 That's nice. 1994 01:46:25,513 --> 01:46:26,681 [both] Uh-uh. 1995 01:46:27,432 --> 01:46:31,311 [whimpering] 1996 01:46:42,447 --> 01:46:45,283 [announcer] Ladies and gentlemen, your host, Roscoe Jenkins! 1997 01:46:45,366 --> 01:46:47,660 [audience cheers] 1998 01:46:47,744 --> 01:46:50,246 All right. Thank you, thank you. 1999 01:46:51,497 --> 01:46:56,002 You all looking good. Looking good. What's good, family? 2000 01:46:56,586 --> 01:46:59,547 Today's show is about family. 2001 01:46:59,631 --> 01:47:02,967 And what better way to kick it off than with the doctor's own? 2002 01:47:03,676 --> 01:47:06,136 Say hello to the Jenkins clan. 2003 01:47:06,220 --> 01:47:07,930 Hey, y'all! Hey, everybody! 2004 01:47:08,014 --> 01:47:10,975 Ow! Pump, pump, pump! 2005 01:47:11,059 --> 01:47:12,518 Betty. Betty. Yes! 2006 01:47:12,602 --> 01:47:13,978 [Betty] Mind your own business, Otis. 2007 01:47:14,062 --> 01:47:16,481 - We'll be right back. - We trying to have a good time... 2008 01:47:16,564 --> 01:47:18,399 ...here on 'Scoe's show. You always gotta say something. 2009 01:47:18,483 --> 01:47:19,776 [Betty] Shut up. Shut up. 2010 01:47:19,859 --> 01:47:21,611 [audience applauding] 2011 01:47:21,694 --> 01:47:23,279 Let's get started. 2012 01:47:25,406 --> 01:47:28,576 You're a doctor, so tell me this. 2013 01:47:28,660 --> 01:47:32,747 Why am I having trouble reaching an orgasm? 2014 01:47:32,830 --> 01:47:34,123 So you've never been aced? 2015 01:47:34,207 --> 01:47:36,501 [Betty] Now, I know how to get myself to the destination, 2016 01:47:36,584 --> 01:47:39,003 I just need a captain to navigate the waters. 2017 01:47:39,087 --> 01:47:40,797 Now, 'Scoe, you got to help me here. 2018 01:47:40,880 --> 01:47:43,757 Is that thing physical or is that thing mental? 2019 01:47:43,840 --> 01:47:47,427 Or is it emotional, 'Scoe? Like, where do you go to find... 2020 01:47:47,511 --> 01:47:48,970 Can we cut? I'm... I'm uncomfortable. 2021 01:47:49,054 --> 01:47:51,890 Wait a minute. I'm trying to figure out how I'm supposed to get mine. 2022 01:47:51,973 --> 01:47:54,768 So you think it's okay to spank your kids. 2023 01:47:54,851 --> 01:47:58,105 Yeah, I spank my kids. I get in their... [bleeps] 2024 01:47:58,187 --> 01:48:00,774 They... [bleep] up, I start... [bleep] them up. 2025 01:48:00,857 --> 01:48:03,527 - Tag team. - Oh, cuss words. 2026 01:48:03,610 --> 01:48:06,113 Oh, gee, I'm sorry. 2027 01:48:06,195 --> 01:48:09,116 [bleep] that! You know me, man. 2028 01:48:09,198 --> 01:48:12,994 Hustling is my job. I mean, I ain't never really paid no rent. 2029 01:48:13,078 --> 01:48:16,164 You know what I'm saying? I ain't never really paid no bills. 2030 01:48:16,248 --> 01:48:18,041 You know what I'm saying? So... But I... 2031 01:48:18,125 --> 01:48:20,752 For some reason, I've always got cash in my pocket! 2032 01:48:21,837 --> 01:48:24,047 I guess it's cause I got a honest face. 2033 01:48:26,591 --> 01:48:27,592 I mean, I don't know, 2034 01:48:27,676 --> 01:48:30,137 you might have a problem with that since, when we was little, 2035 01:48:30,219 --> 01:48:32,681 I would always beat you. You know what I'm saying? 2036 01:48:32,764 --> 01:48:35,600 You pull out the cards, you one, two, three, you draw four, I'm like... 2037 01:48:35,684 --> 01:48:39,896 Bam! Uno. You know what I'm saying? You make a move, I'm C-4, C-2... 2038 01:48:39,980 --> 01:48:43,066 Bam! I sunk your battleship. You remember that, don't you? 2039 01:48:43,150 --> 01:48:45,277 [Betty] And then he be finished. I'm like, "Damn! 2040 01:48:45,360 --> 01:48:47,446 Is something wrong with my... My cakes?" 2041 01:48:47,529 --> 01:48:49,156 You know what I'm saying? I don't know if something wrong 2042 01:48:49,238 --> 01:48:50,615 with my tasty cakes, 'Scoe. 2043 01:48:50,699 --> 01:48:52,492 You actually tase your kids? 2044 01:48:52,576 --> 01:48:56,204 Hell, yeah, I tase my... [bleep] kids. You shock 'em, they be like... 2045 01:48:56,288 --> 01:48:59,332 I say, "You gonna take out that trash now?" He just... 2046 01:48:59,416 --> 01:49:00,751 For not taking out the trash? 2047 01:49:00,834 --> 01:49:03,545 [Otis imitating electrocution] 2048 01:49:03,628 --> 01:49:06,715 Forty five thousand volts right through his big... [bleep] 2049 01:49:06,798 --> 01:49:10,176 - "Yes... Dad..." [babbles] - Yeah. 2050 01:49:10,258 --> 01:49:13,179 - [cell phone ringing] - Hold it, hold up. Who is this? 2051 01:49:13,261 --> 01:49:14,764 Yeah, what it is? 2052 01:49:15,556 --> 01:49:18,768 Man, I'm on the show. You ain't watching? I'm on the show right now! 2053 01:49:18,851 --> 01:49:21,437 I ain't gotta... No, I'm on the show. Look at me. Look. 2054 01:49:23,522 --> 01:49:27,234 We could do it right now, bro. You put your hands up. Bam! Bam! 2055 01:49:27,318 --> 01:49:29,277 Or rock-paper-scissors. 2056 01:49:29,361 --> 01:49:32,031 We could do it right here. I mean, what you scratching for? 2057 01:49:32,114 --> 01:49:34,909 You know, you want to scratch? You want to have a scratch battle? 2058 01:49:34,992 --> 01:49:38,162 Cause we can scratch out. We can... We could DJ scratch... 2059 01:49:38,746 --> 01:49:42,166 I'll make me a bubble bath, light me some little candles, 2060 01:49:42,249 --> 01:49:45,961 and then I gets down in that water, 'Scoe, and I be too... 2061 01:49:46,045 --> 01:49:49,173 Oh, I'm thinking about it right now. Let me get myself together. 2062 01:49:49,256 --> 01:49:50,841 - Cut! Cut! - [Betty] God forgive me. 2063 01:49:50,925 --> 01:49:53,677 Take the $150, go buy you a eight ball. 2064 01:49:53,761 --> 01:49:56,514 Flip the eight ball, you gonna make 300 off that. 2065 01:49:56,597 --> 01:49:58,098 Take the 300, get you a quarter. 2066 01:49:58,682 --> 01:50:01,644 [Reggie] Take the quarter ounce, flip that. Stay over at Aunt Lea's... 2067 01:50:01,727 --> 01:50:04,021 Like if you... If there wasn't an audience out there, 2068 01:50:04,104 --> 01:50:06,190 I would race you up and down the audience steps. 2069 01:50:06,273 --> 01:50:08,442 We can go. You know we can go too. 2070 01:50:08,526 --> 01:50:11,487 Take the half ounce money, flip the half ounce money. 2071 01:50:11,570 --> 01:50:14,782 Now you ready for a ounce. You got a quarter ki now! 2072 01:50:14,865 --> 01:50:18,786 Now everybody in the neighborhood got on new sneakers and walkie-talkies. 2073 01:50:18,869 --> 01:50:23,165 Everybody is working for you, you doing your thing and everything. 2074 01:50:26,877 --> 01:50:30,756 I hope the feds ain't watching this. I'll call you back. 2075 01:50:32,466 --> 01:50:36,803 I am. I am afraid, okay? I'm... I'm... I'm afraid of being hurt, 2076 01:50:36,886 --> 01:50:38,471 and I don't want to be hurt. 2077 01:50:38,555 --> 01:50:40,223 You pursue unattainable men. 2078 01:50:41,558 --> 01:50:44,185 - What? - You want men you can't have. 2079 01:50:44,269 --> 01:50:45,770 Men I can't have? 2080 01:50:46,980 --> 01:50:50,233 Listen here... [bleep] okay? I can have any man I want, okay? 2081 01:50:50,316 --> 01:50:51,651 Don't get me twisted, 'Scoe. 2082 01:50:51,734 --> 01:50:54,737 I am pretty in the face and thick around the waist. 2083 01:50:54,821 --> 01:50:56,906 You better ask somebody. I got sugar walls! 2084 01:50:57,532 --> 01:51:00,118 This right here is sweet tea. Ain't that right, baby? 2085 01:51:00,702 --> 01:51:02,161 Yo, ma. 2086 01:51:02,245 --> 01:51:07,125 Yeah. I'm saying, Doc, the booty is illmatic! 2087 01:51:07,625 --> 01:51:11,838 Well, that wasn't quite what a brother had in mind. 2088 01:51:11,921 --> 01:51:13,590 But that's the thing about family. 2089 01:51:13,673 --> 01:51:16,301 Unpredictable, but entertaining. 2090 01:51:16,383 --> 01:51:19,095 And we love 'em. Peace. 2091 01:51:19,762 --> 01:51:25,476 [Joe's "We're Family" playing] 155308