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1
00:00:02,125 --> 00:00:04,030
It's about time,
Mr. Lollygag.
2
00:00:04,030 --> 00:00:05,488
I sent you to the store
hours ago.
3
00:00:05,488 --> 00:00:08,238
Sorry, Mom. I tried to drive
fast but there were squirrels.
4
00:00:08,238 --> 00:00:10,405
{\an8}Adult Timmy: My mom and Frankhad this weird co-dependency
5
00:00:10,405 --> 00:00:12,280
{\an8}where his happinesswas tied to her happiness,
6
00:00:12,280 --> 00:00:14,197
but so was her happiness.
7
00:00:14,197 --> 00:00:16,780
{\an8}Hell's bells,
real Cool Whip? It was on your list.
8
00:00:16,780 --> 00:00:19,072
{\an8}- Oh...
- You let him buy real Cool Whip?
9
00:00:19,072 --> 00:00:20,322
Did I get a raise
I don't know about?
10
00:00:20,322 --> 00:00:23,155
{\an8}I wrote Cool Whip with a "K,"
the cheap store brand.
11
00:00:23,155 --> 00:00:24,530
{\an8}Never buy anything
spelled correctly.
12
00:00:24,530 --> 00:00:26,655
{\an8}At Ralph's you pay extra
for grammar.
13
00:00:26,655 --> 00:00:28,738
Been a long day.
I'm gonna take a shower.
14
00:00:28,738 --> 00:00:30,822
It won't happen again, Mom.
I need to be able to count on you
15
00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:32,072
while your dad's doing
all this overtime.
16
00:00:34,488 --> 00:00:37,447
{\an8}[ Southern accent ] Greetings
and salutations, madam!
17
00:00:37,447 --> 00:00:39,863
{\an8}I had been castin a production of "Show Boat,"
18
00:00:39,863 --> 00:00:41,447
playing a suaveriverboat gambler.
19
00:00:41,447 --> 00:00:43,280
Unfortunately, the onlyperson from the South
20
00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:45,238
I was familiar withwas Foghorn Leghorn.
21
00:00:45,238 --> 00:00:48,572
{\an8}I say, I say,
what a charming evening,
22
00:00:48,572 --> 00:00:51,447
{\an8}the scent of juniper
filling the air.
23
00:00:51,447 --> 00:00:53,863
{\an8}Oh.
It's not juniper, it's Mom's boiled cabbage.
24
00:00:53,863 --> 00:00:55,863
{\an8}And you missed out!
25
00:00:55,863 --> 00:00:57,655
{\an8}Enjoy your peanut butter
sandwich for supper.
26
00:00:57,655 --> 00:00:59,947
Oh, I think we can do better
than that for our star.
27
00:00:59,947 --> 00:01:03,238
{\an8}- Star.
- I am the star!
28
00:01:03,238 --> 00:01:04,988
I totally aced my audition.
29
00:01:04,988 --> 00:01:07,280
How many male roles
in this show?
30
00:01:07,280 --> 00:01:08,197
Seventeen.
31
00:01:10,155 --> 00:01:12,238
Maybe we should've put up
more fliers.
32
00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:16,905
{\an8}♪♪
33
00:01:16,905 --> 00:01:19,530
{\an8}I'm making a Hungry-Man
dinner for your dad. I'll throw one in for you.
34
00:01:19,530 --> 00:01:22,738
He gets a Hungry-Man
for showing up late? Why is Timmy so special?
35
00:01:22,738 --> 00:01:25,030
{\an8}Oh, he's only special
compared to the rest of you.
36
00:01:25,030 --> 00:01:27,947
{\an8}Oh, you hear that?
It's not you, it's us!
37
00:01:27,947 --> 00:01:29,572
How'd rehearsal go?
38
00:01:29,572 --> 00:01:31,530
Did you bring up my suggestion
of adding a genie?
39
00:01:31,530 --> 00:01:33,572
I doubt they'd have a genie
on a Mississippi riverboat.
40
00:01:33,572 --> 00:01:35,280
All I know is it works
on that show.
41
00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:37,280
{\an8}This production has much
bigger problems, Mom.
42
00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:39,113
{\an8}I'm doing the best work
of my career,
43
00:01:39,113 --> 00:01:40,738
{\an8}but these sets
are amateur hour.
44
00:01:40,738 --> 00:01:43,072
{\an8}It's called "Show Boat,"
and so far there's no boat.
45
00:01:43,072 --> 00:01:45,072
{\an8}Wendi says they can't spend
any money on sets.
46
00:01:45,072 --> 00:01:47,322
{\an8}The whole point is raising funds
for soccer equipment.
47
00:01:47,322 --> 00:01:50,311
{\an8}The whole point is reaching
across those footlights
48
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:51,905
to bring a little magic
into people's lives.
49
00:01:51,905 --> 00:01:54,488
{\an8}And what's more magical
than a genie?
50
00:01:54,488 --> 00:01:57,738
{\an8}I'll shut up now.
51
00:01:57,738 --> 00:01:59,947
{\an8}I couldn't help overhear
that your little show
52
00:01:59,947 --> 00:02:02,905
{\an8}might be in need of some
nautical-themed items.
53
00:02:02,905 --> 00:02:05,113
{\an8}I am a man with influential
friends and associates.
54
00:02:05,113 --> 00:02:06,947
{\an8}Uh-huh, you saw
"The Godfather" again.
55
00:02:06,947 --> 00:02:08,988
{\an8}Seriously, how do you keep
getting into that movie?
56
00:02:08,988 --> 00:02:11,738
{\an8}I am a man with influential
friends and associates. [ Sighs ]
57
00:02:11,738 --> 00:02:14,238
{\an8}I might be able to procure
some boat stuff for your set.
58
00:02:14,238 --> 00:02:15,530
What's that gonna cost me?
59
00:02:15,530 --> 00:02:17,613
{\an8}You insult me
with offers of money.
60
00:02:17,613 --> 00:02:19,030
{\an8}But someday --
61
00:02:19,030 --> 00:02:20,738
{\an8}and this day
may never come --
62
00:02:20,738 --> 00:02:23,072
{\an8}I will call upon you
to do a service for me.
63
00:02:23,072 --> 00:02:24,113
You're saying
it may never come?
64
00:02:24,113 --> 00:02:26,197
Oh...it'll come.
65
00:02:26,197 --> 00:02:28,030
So, what have I been missing
around here?
66
00:02:28,030 --> 00:02:29,822
Anything interesting
with the kids?
67
00:02:29,822 --> 00:02:31,155
You skip a few nights
at home,
68
00:02:31,155 --> 00:02:32,738
you think they
suddenly get interesting?
69
00:02:32,738 --> 00:02:34,322
That's kind of interesting.
70
00:02:34,322 --> 00:02:39,363
[ "Drunken Sailor" plays ]
71
00:02:39,363 --> 00:02:40,780
Oh, my God.
72
00:02:40,780 --> 00:02:42,405
Joey got that
for my show!
73
00:02:42,405 --> 00:02:44,863
How does he get his mitts
on crazy stuff like that?
74
00:02:44,863 --> 00:02:47,530
Don't ask too many questions.
Otherwise, I might have to return my Ginsu knives.
75
00:02:47,530 --> 00:02:49,613
I just hope there's not some
ocean liner out there,
76
00:02:49,613 --> 00:02:51,655
drifting around in circles.
77
00:02:51,655 --> 00:02:54,530
Frank, you'll need to drive
Timmy to his rehearsal.
78
00:02:54,530 --> 00:02:56,780
He's not gonna be able to carry
that wheel on his bike.
79
00:02:56,780 --> 00:02:58,863
You've got the whole house
jumping through hoops
80
00:02:58,863 --> 00:03:00,155
just because
you're in a show.
81
00:03:00,155 --> 00:03:02,030
It's not fair.
If it bugs you,
82
00:03:02,030 --> 00:03:03,947
do something great
that people like, like I do.
83
00:03:03,947 --> 00:03:06,905
I'm great at important things
like algebra and penmanship --
84
00:03:06,905 --> 00:03:08,488
not lame stuff
like musicals.
85
00:03:08,488 --> 00:03:10,488
"Show Boat," lame?
86
00:03:10,488 --> 00:03:13,655
Tell that to legendary
theater impresario...
87
00:03:13,655 --> 00:03:15,738
Florenz Ziegfeld.
88
00:03:15,738 --> 00:03:17,280
Looking back, it's shocking
89
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:19,238
that my brothersdidn't punch me more.
90
00:03:19,238 --> 00:03:21,197
[ "Drunken Sailor" plays ]
Hey!
91
00:03:21,197 --> 00:03:22,905
Look what we brought!
92
00:03:22,905 --> 00:03:25,655
A genuine captain's wheel?
Far out!
93
00:03:25,655 --> 00:03:27,197
Yeah, my brother got it for us
for the Cotton Blossom.
94
00:03:27,197 --> 00:03:30,280
Thanks so much, Frank!
95
00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:31,447
[ Laughing ] Oh.
Oh, no, no, I meant my --
96
00:03:31,447 --> 00:03:34,238
I like to support the theater.
97
00:03:34,238 --> 00:03:36,322
Aren't you late
for your dumb nonsense?
98
00:03:36,322 --> 00:03:38,155
Yeah.
99
00:03:38,155 --> 00:03:40,322
Are you one of
the actors, too, then?
100
00:03:40,322 --> 00:03:42,238
No, I'm from
the soccer team.
101
00:03:42,238 --> 00:03:44,072
We're hoping to buy
shin guards this year
102
00:03:44,072 --> 00:03:45,947
so I can finally stop bleeding
through my knee socks.
103
00:03:45,947 --> 00:03:47,905
We tried to get her
to be in the show because...
104
00:03:47,905 --> 00:03:50,447
Uh-huh, because why?
105
00:03:50,447 --> 00:03:54,447
You know, because it's set
in the South, and...
106
00:03:54,447 --> 00:03:57,655
you have such a beautiful
singing voice. I don't.
107
00:03:57,655 --> 00:03:59,280
But I am the only black person
in school.
108
00:04:01,988 --> 00:04:03,697
[ Snaps fingers ] We should
get this wheel backstage.
109
00:04:03,697 --> 00:04:07,113
Ladies, I can handle it.
I placed in the 75th percentile
110
00:04:07,113 --> 00:04:09,530
for the President's
Physical Fitness Test.
111
00:04:09,530 --> 00:04:14,738
♪♪
112
00:04:14,738 --> 00:04:16,488
Hey pal, look what
Gino brought me.
113
00:04:16,488 --> 00:04:18,447
A whole case.
114
00:04:18,447 --> 00:04:20,322
Check this out.
How'd you come across that?
115
00:04:20,322 --> 00:04:23,113
[ Chuckles ] Well, let's
just say it fell off the back of a truck.
116
00:04:23,113 --> 00:04:25,447
Is that what happened?
Pretty much.
117
00:04:25,447 --> 00:04:27,905
Truck hit a speed bump,
it fell off the back. This pleases me.
118
00:04:27,905 --> 00:04:29,863
You two have shown me
great respect.
119
00:04:29,863 --> 00:04:31,780
Oh, hey, can I try out
your ring?
120
00:04:31,780 --> 00:04:34,238
[ "Love Theme
from 'The Godfather'" plays ]
121
00:04:34,238 --> 00:04:35,822
[ Ring whirring ]
122
00:04:35,822 --> 00:04:40,363
♪♪
123
00:04:40,363 --> 00:04:42,488
Melissa: I know what you're
thinking, but no,
124
00:04:42,488 --> 00:04:44,738
this wasn't done
by professional carpenters.
125
00:04:44,738 --> 00:04:48,488
It's terrible, but your wheel
will definitely help.
126
00:04:52,988 --> 00:04:55,155
For the record, I wanted to do
a bake sale.
127
00:04:55,155 --> 00:04:57,697
Sister Euphemia:
Hold the work backstage!
128
00:04:57,697 --> 00:05:01,613
The artists are attempting
to engage the muse.
129
00:05:01,613 --> 00:05:03,405
From the fourth bar.
130
00:05:03,405 --> 00:05:07,197
Gaylord and Magnolia,
feeling the first tender shoots
131
00:05:07,197 --> 00:05:09,238
of love's flowering.
[ Piano plays ]
132
00:05:09,238 --> 00:05:14,030
Together:
♪ Might as well make believe ♪
133
00:05:14,030 --> 00:05:21,863
♪ I love you ♪
134
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:27,030
♪ For to tell the truth ♪
135
00:05:27,030 --> 00:05:35,363
♪ I do ♪
136
00:05:35,363 --> 00:05:37,363
Lovely, children.
137
00:05:37,363 --> 00:05:39,988
Nice working with you, kiddo.
You've got some chops.
138
00:05:39,988 --> 00:05:41,697
We might want
to speak to costumes
139
00:05:41,697 --> 00:05:42,905
about getting you some lifts.
140
00:05:45,197 --> 00:05:47,113
There goes our money
for the soccer team.
141
00:05:47,113 --> 00:05:48,697
I should've gone
to public school.
142
00:05:48,697 --> 00:05:50,488
They have Title IX,
pizza Fridays,
143
00:05:50,488 --> 00:05:52,405
and other black people.
144
00:05:52,405 --> 00:05:54,030
We'll never be ready
by show night.
145
00:05:54,030 --> 00:05:56,655
What if we went
at this differently?
146
00:05:56,655 --> 00:05:59,363
Like a bake sale?
Forget the three-dimensional boat,
147
00:05:59,363 --> 00:06:01,405
we could do something
lightweight in two dimensions
148
00:06:01,405 --> 00:06:04,280
and suspend it
from a traverse rod. That sounds smart.
149
00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:07,530
I placed in the 76th percentile
in Engineering and Physics.
150
00:06:07,530 --> 00:06:10,238
I would go with 2/10 scale
with a forced perspective.
151
00:06:10,238 --> 00:06:12,655
We'll build the ship...
152
00:06:12,655 --> 00:06:17,613
One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine...
153
00:06:17,613 --> 00:06:19,447
10 Frank's feet long.
154
00:06:19,447 --> 00:06:22,113
That sounds great, but we don't
have time to start over.
155
00:06:22,113 --> 00:06:24,280
We do if I help,
and we keep it very simple.
156
00:06:24,280 --> 00:06:26,488
We need a steam whistle,
smoke machine, lots of lights,
157
00:06:26,488 --> 00:06:27,905
and a rotating paddle wheel.
158
00:06:27,905 --> 00:06:29,488
Your set will look
like a million bucks.
159
00:06:29,488 --> 00:06:31,155
We have ten.
160
00:06:31,155 --> 00:06:32,447
Eight. I bought gum
for the crew.
161
00:06:35,155 --> 00:06:37,238
Where on Earth are you
coming from, Frank?
162
00:06:37,238 --> 00:06:38,697
I swear I heard you
cleaning the gutters,
163
00:06:38,697 --> 00:06:40,197
stomping around up there.
164
00:06:40,197 --> 00:06:42,488
That possum
must be putting on weight.
165
00:06:42,488 --> 00:06:44,697
Sorry, Mom, I stuck around
to help work on Timmy's sets.
166
00:06:44,697 --> 00:06:46,280
Every day you put
the gutters off,
167
00:06:46,280 --> 00:06:47,947
that possum becomes
a more formidable foe.
168
00:06:47,947 --> 00:06:49,905
Why can't somebody else
do the gutters, like Lawrence?
169
00:06:49,905 --> 00:06:51,280
'Cause I told you to do it.
170
00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:53,113
Yeah. Plus, I have
that inner-ear thing.
171
00:06:53,113 --> 00:06:55,530
Whenever I go up on a ladder,
my inner ear hears the words,
172
00:06:55,530 --> 00:06:57,238
"This seems like
a Frank job."
173
00:06:57,238 --> 00:06:59,905
Mom, guess what?
I'm playing two roles now.
174
00:06:59,905 --> 00:07:01,863
They asked me to also play
Stevedore Joe,
175
00:07:01,863 --> 00:07:03,447
so I get to sing
"Old Man River"!
176
00:07:03,447 --> 00:07:05,030
Isn't Joe
an Afro-American?
177
00:07:05,030 --> 00:07:07,363
It'll be my greatest
acting challenge.
178
00:07:07,363 --> 00:07:09,947
But no black-face.
That's considered in poor taste now.
179
00:07:09,947 --> 00:07:12,155
Very good, Mom.
Hmm. Heard that
180
00:07:12,155 --> 00:07:14,447
from an Oriental.
Eh, there it is.
181
00:07:14,447 --> 00:07:16,988
So, I'm thinking I want to keep
helping the girls with the set.
182
00:07:16,988 --> 00:07:20,113
They really like my ideas.
Ideas.
183
00:07:20,113 --> 00:07:22,113
No, I have much too much work
for you to do around here.
184
00:07:22,113 --> 00:07:23,947
Besides, I only have room
in this family
185
00:07:23,947 --> 00:07:25,405
for one insufferable
show-off.
186
00:07:25,405 --> 00:07:27,488
Forward roll!
[ Telephone ringing ]
187
00:07:27,488 --> 00:07:29,155
Here we go.
[ Laughs ]
188
00:07:29,155 --> 00:07:31,488
- Oh!
- Wow.
189
00:07:31,488 --> 00:07:33,238
- Cleary residence.
- Hey, Frank.
190
00:07:33,238 --> 00:07:34,655
- Oh, hi, Wendi.
- Hey, thanks again
191
00:07:34,655 --> 00:07:35,988
for all your help today.
192
00:07:35,988 --> 00:07:39,030
Yeah, about that.
I'm not sure --
193
00:07:39,030 --> 00:07:41,738
Oh, we're asking too much,
aren't we? N--
194
00:07:41,738 --> 00:07:44,113
I-I understand.It's just watching you today,
195
00:07:44,113 --> 00:07:46,197
all lit up with inspiration,
196
00:07:46,197 --> 00:07:47,780
this show started
to get fun again.
197
00:07:47,780 --> 00:07:49,613
Well, it's just
I'm not sure...
198
00:07:49,613 --> 00:07:52,780
- [ Laughs ]
- Hey, hey.
199
00:07:52,780 --> 00:07:54,238
- Whup!
- Nice!
200
00:07:54,238 --> 00:07:55,905
...how I'll be able
to sleep tonight,
201
00:07:55,905 --> 00:07:57,155
dreaming about
putting that boat together.
202
00:07:57,155 --> 00:08:00,405
See you tomorrow, Wendi.
Is that my girlfriend?
203
00:08:00,405 --> 00:08:02,822
Sorry you had to talk
to Frank.
204
00:08:02,822 --> 00:08:05,655
[ Gags ] Now the receiver
smells like Frank breath.
205
00:08:12,488 --> 00:08:14,238
♪ You an' me,
we sweat an' strain ♪
206
00:08:14,238 --> 00:08:17,322
To get away with defying Mom,Frank had to work double-duty,
207
00:08:17,322 --> 00:08:20,488
still executingall her heinous chores
208
00:08:20,488 --> 00:08:23,405
and then secretly slipping awayto build sets with Wendi.
209
00:08:23,405 --> 00:08:28,863
♪ An' you land
in jaaaaiiiil... ♪
210
00:08:28,863 --> 00:08:31,613
[ Wagner's "Ride of
the Valkyries" plays ]
211
00:08:31,613 --> 00:08:39,947
♪♪
212
00:08:39,947 --> 00:08:42,197
What's up? Besides us.
213
00:08:42,197 --> 00:08:45,072
Ha!
No horseplay! I'm on a ladder.
214
00:08:45,072 --> 00:08:46,405
Where did you get
the scissor lift?
215
00:08:46,405 --> 00:08:47,947
If I tell you,
everyone gets one,
216
00:08:47,947 --> 00:08:50,030
then they're
not cool anymore.
217
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:51,863
That looks like
pretty grim work.
218
00:08:51,863 --> 00:08:54,072
It's not bad, except for
the baby bird skeletons,
219
00:08:54,072 --> 00:08:56,238
but I get the satisfaction
of helping Mom.
220
00:08:56,238 --> 00:08:58,988
More satisfaction than helping
those girls from the play
221
00:08:58,988 --> 00:09:02,322
who are your own age
and not related to you?
222
00:09:02,322 --> 00:09:05,280
Entertainment folk with their
free and easy ways...
223
00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:07,197
Nobody's "free and easy."
224
00:09:07,197 --> 00:09:09,655
They're nice girls who
just want to play soccer.
225
00:09:09,655 --> 00:09:12,113
[ "Love Theme from 'The Godfather'" plays ]
How about I take over here for you
226
00:09:12,113 --> 00:09:14,613
so you can go hang out
with your show folk?
227
00:09:14,613 --> 00:09:17,363
Then one day, you can do
a favor for me.
228
00:09:17,363 --> 00:09:20,405
♪♪
229
00:09:20,405 --> 00:09:22,572
Okay.
230
00:09:22,572 --> 00:09:25,113
But if isn't done to perfection,
Mom'll know it wasn't me.
231
00:09:25,113 --> 00:09:27,363
Relax, I'll do it
exactly like someone
232
00:09:27,363 --> 00:09:29,363
who is weirdly obsessed
with the approval of his mother. You better.
233
00:09:34,447 --> 00:09:35,780
[ Brakes squeal ]
234
00:09:37,863 --> 00:09:39,905
[ "Drunken Sailor" plays ]
235
00:09:43,322 --> 00:09:44,488
[ Tires squeal ]
236
00:09:44,488 --> 00:09:46,030
[ Door closes ]
237
00:09:46,030 --> 00:09:47,738
Where'd that thing
come from?
238
00:09:47,738 --> 00:09:49,738
I know a guy
who knows a guy.
239
00:09:49,738 --> 00:09:51,363
In court they're called
accomplices.
240
00:09:51,363 --> 00:09:53,738
Get down from there.
You and I are going for seafood.
241
00:09:58,113 --> 00:09:59,988
Hey, you know that favor
you owe me?
242
00:09:59,988 --> 00:10:01,655
I need it right now,
and fast.
243
00:10:01,655 --> 00:10:04,155
You think something like this
is a harmless prank,
244
00:10:04,155 --> 00:10:07,155
but folks have gone to jail
for less.
245
00:10:07,155 --> 00:10:10,155
I don't want to go to jail.
No, you don't.
246
00:10:10,155 --> 00:10:13,280
There are much better ways
to see Johnny Cash for free.
247
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:15,530
But maybe if you and I go in the
restaurant and you apologize,
248
00:10:15,530 --> 00:10:16,613
we can smooth this over.
249
00:10:16,613 --> 00:10:19,072
Okay.
250
00:10:19,072 --> 00:10:20,863
But what am I apologizing for?
251
00:10:20,863 --> 00:10:22,572
Seriously?
252
00:10:22,572 --> 00:10:23,863
You're gonna sit there and deny
that you stole that?
253
00:10:25,488 --> 00:10:27,905
Stole what?
254
00:10:27,905 --> 00:10:31,280
[ "Drunken Sailor" plays ]
255
00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:33,655
That wasn't there before.
256
00:10:33,655 --> 00:10:35,155
[ Tires squeal ]
257
00:10:35,155 --> 00:10:37,863
♪♪
258
00:10:37,863 --> 00:10:40,238
Let's go. Come on.
259
00:10:40,238 --> 00:10:42,322
Just point it
at the backdrop and...
260
00:10:42,322 --> 00:10:44,738
[ Button clicks,
projector whirring ]
261
00:10:44,738 --> 00:10:48,155
Wendi: Wow!
So pretty, Frank.
262
00:10:48,155 --> 00:10:50,238
You're an artist.
263
00:10:50,238 --> 00:10:52,155
Is that somebody surfing
on the Mississippi River?
264
00:10:52,155 --> 00:10:54,113
Oh, I shot this
at Zuma Beach.
265
00:10:54,113 --> 00:10:55,738
We can splice that out.
266
00:10:55,738 --> 00:10:57,113
You should be really proud.
267
00:10:57,113 --> 00:10:59,530
I mean, you built
a really great set.
268
00:10:59,530 --> 00:11:01,780
And more importantly,
got Melissa to stop yapping
269
00:11:01,780 --> 00:11:03,322
about her bake sale.
270
00:11:03,322 --> 00:11:04,738
I'm selling cupcakes
in the lobby.
271
00:11:04,738 --> 00:11:06,113
I don't care
what anybody says.
272
00:11:06,113 --> 00:11:08,322
Places for dress rehearsal!
[ Piano plays ]
273
00:11:08,322 --> 00:11:15,780
♪ Only make believe
I love you... ♪
274
00:11:15,780 --> 00:11:18,363
♪ Only make believe ♪
275
00:11:18,363 --> 00:11:21,488
♪ That you love me ♪
276
00:11:21,488 --> 00:11:24,863
[ Horn blowing ]
Together: ♪ Others find peace of mind ♪
277
00:11:24,863 --> 00:11:27,822
♪ In pretending... ♪
[ Applause, scattered cheers ]
278
00:11:27,822 --> 00:11:30,780
Timmy: ♪ Couldn't you? ♪
279
00:11:30,780 --> 00:11:32,780
Magnolia: ♪ Couldn't I? ♪
280
00:11:32,780 --> 00:11:36,947
Together: ♪ Couldn't we... ♪
281
00:11:36,947 --> 00:11:39,822
♪ Make... ♪
There I was,singing my guts out,
282
00:11:39,822 --> 00:11:42,405
and all anyone was looking atwas Frank's stupid boat.
283
00:11:42,405 --> 00:11:44,947
[ Crowd chanting "Frank" ]
My pride kept me from caringwhat they thought --
284
00:11:44,947 --> 00:11:47,988
or it would have if I had any.
Forward roll!
285
00:11:47,988 --> 00:11:49,738
[ Chanting continues ]
286
00:11:53,197 --> 00:11:55,613
[ Cheers ]
287
00:11:59,863 --> 00:12:02,988
Look, all I'm asking is you tone
down the effects tomorrow night
288
00:12:02,988 --> 00:12:04,905
so the audience
notices I'm there.
289
00:12:04,905 --> 00:12:07,280
Actors, they always think
they're the ones
290
00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:09,988
people come to see,
but the star tonight was my set.
291
00:12:09,988 --> 00:12:12,738
And me!
I play the boat!
292
00:12:12,738 --> 00:12:15,488
Okay, the stage crew
liked it, sure, but tomorrow
293
00:12:15,488 --> 00:12:17,863
is a paying audience of
soccer team boosters --
294
00:12:17,863 --> 00:12:20,655
a more sophisticated,
European crowd.
295
00:12:20,655 --> 00:12:22,113
I'm not changing a thing.
296
00:12:22,113 --> 00:12:24,488
It's called "Show Boat,"
not Show Timmy.
297
00:12:24,488 --> 00:12:26,405
Frank had gotten his firsttaste of that fleeting,
298
00:12:26,405 --> 00:12:28,613
shallow showbiz glorythat feels so much better
299
00:12:28,613 --> 00:12:29,905
than actual love,
300
00:12:29,905 --> 00:12:31,863
but it was supposed to mine.
301
00:12:31,863 --> 00:12:34,822
And in taking it,he had made a powerful enemy.
302
00:12:34,822 --> 00:12:37,780
Hey, Dad, why don't you
get out that projector
303
00:12:37,780 --> 00:12:39,488
and show us those home movies
you took at the air show?
304
00:12:40,697 --> 00:12:42,780
Outstanding idea.
305
00:12:42,780 --> 00:12:44,905
- Mm-hmm.
- Buckle up, kids.
306
00:12:44,905 --> 00:12:47,613
Tonight we are soaring
with the Blue Angels!
307
00:12:47,613 --> 00:12:49,447
[ Laughs ]
308
00:12:49,447 --> 00:12:50,947
His air show movies?
309
00:12:50,947 --> 00:12:52,697
Really? Why would you
do that to us?
310
00:12:52,697 --> 00:12:55,113
I'll have to find my glasses
with the fake open eyes.
311
00:12:55,113 --> 00:12:57,613
We all agreed we'd only let him
show those on Father's Day
312
00:12:57,613 --> 00:12:59,322
and only if we forgot
to get him a card.
313
00:12:59,322 --> 00:13:00,697
And ever since
we made that rule,
314
00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:02,613
we have never forgotten
the card.
315
00:13:02,613 --> 00:13:04,780
Oh, come on.
Those movies aren't so bad,
316
00:13:04,780 --> 00:13:06,488
and it makes your dad happy
when we watch 'em together.
317
00:13:06,488 --> 00:13:08,155
I'll be in the kitchen.
Mike: Peg!
318
00:13:08,155 --> 00:13:10,780
My Bell and Howell
projector is gone!
319
00:13:10,780 --> 00:13:13,072
Well, things have a way of
disappearing around this house.
320
00:13:13,072 --> 00:13:16,405
I can't keep
a bra catalogue!
321
00:13:16,405 --> 00:13:17,905
Your projector is missing?
322
00:13:17,905 --> 00:13:19,530
I don't know.
That's strange.
323
00:13:19,530 --> 00:13:21,322
I might know who had something
to do with this.
324
00:13:21,322 --> 00:13:23,363
Joey!
325
00:13:23,363 --> 00:13:25,197
You know anything about
my missing projector?
326
00:13:25,197 --> 00:13:27,738
No, Pop, but I can ask
Mousey and Ray-Ray
327
00:13:27,738 --> 00:13:29,530
to check the word
on the street. Or maybe I can call the police
328
00:13:29,530 --> 00:13:30,988
and have them search
the premises,
329
00:13:30,988 --> 00:13:32,863
including a certain,
uh, tree house.
330
00:13:32,863 --> 00:13:35,697
You don't have to call
the police.
331
00:13:35,697 --> 00:13:37,280
I took your projector.
You took it?
332
00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:39,322
I'm using it for special effects
in "Show Boat."
333
00:13:39,322 --> 00:13:41,530
Oh, maybe we should've
taken you to the doctor
334
00:13:41,530 --> 00:13:43,613
when you failed that hearing
test at school and they said
335
00:13:43,613 --> 00:13:45,947
it might be something serious,
because I specifically told you
336
00:13:45,947 --> 00:13:48,738
not to work on "Show Boat."
I know, but I-I...
337
00:13:48,738 --> 00:13:50,988
I like it.
I'm good at it,
338
00:13:50,988 --> 00:13:53,030
and it makes me happy.
Is that the groovy, new trend now?
339
00:13:53,030 --> 00:13:55,780
Everyone doing things that
they're good at and being happy?
340
00:13:55,780 --> 00:13:57,488
Plus the people there
show me appreciation,
341
00:13:57,488 --> 00:13:59,030
which never happens
around here.
342
00:13:59,030 --> 00:14:00,322
Hey, pal,
your appreciation is
343
00:14:00,322 --> 00:14:02,238
that we haven't sold you
to the Gypsies.
344
00:14:02,238 --> 00:14:04,030
Yeah, I'm starting to wonder
what's really going on --
345
00:14:04,030 --> 00:14:05,822
if this sudden interest
in theater
346
00:14:05,822 --> 00:14:07,197
is really an interest
in those girls?
347
00:14:07,197 --> 00:14:08,322
What?!
Mm-hmm.
348
00:14:08,322 --> 00:14:09,863
[ Scoffs ]
349
00:14:09,863 --> 00:14:12,113
No!
Wh-What's going on here
350
00:14:12,113 --> 00:14:13,988
is you can't stand me doing
something away from you
351
00:14:13,988 --> 00:14:15,613
that isn't under
your thumb!
352
00:14:15,613 --> 00:14:18,030
I'm just trying to protect you
from making a fool of yourself.
353
00:14:18,030 --> 00:14:19,780
The only thing you're
protecting me from
354
00:14:19,780 --> 00:14:21,572
is having my own life
355
00:14:21,572 --> 00:14:23,030
because it means
maybe someday
356
00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:25,405
I won't be
at your beck and call!
357
00:14:25,405 --> 00:14:28,238
You're so afraid to go out
in the world and do things,
358
00:14:28,238 --> 00:14:30,780
you just want the rest
of us to be as afraid of the world as you are.
359
00:14:30,780 --> 00:14:33,363
- Hey, knock it off!
- Well, I'm not afraid!
360
00:14:33,363 --> 00:14:34,780
And I'm not afraid of you.
361
00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:40,905
I'm still scared of you, Mom.
362
00:14:40,905 --> 00:14:43,280
Thank you, William. You always
know just what to say.
363
00:14:47,322 --> 00:14:48,655
Once the ideaof watching air show movies
364
00:14:48,655 --> 00:14:50,405
got into his head,my dad couldn't sleep.
365
00:14:50,405 --> 00:14:51,613
And he wasn't about to let thelack of a projector stop him.
366
00:14:51,613 --> 00:14:54,863
Ooh, delta formation.
367
00:14:54,863 --> 00:14:56,530
Such precision.
368
00:14:56,530 --> 00:14:59,155
Whoa, they're flying
backwards.
369
00:14:59,155 --> 00:15:01,822
There you go.
370
00:15:01,822 --> 00:15:03,322
[ Thud in distance ]
371
00:15:03,322 --> 00:15:05,655
[ Dog barking in distance ]
372
00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:08,905
[ "Drunken Sailor" plays ]
373
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:13,322
Ahoy, buttheads. King crabs,
straight from Seafood Fart.
374
00:15:13,322 --> 00:15:16,697
Seriously bummed to see that "O" back.
Pull up the ladder in case of visitors.
375
00:15:16,697 --> 00:15:19,113
My brother Pat climbs in his sleep.
One of the crabs got away from me
376
00:15:19,113 --> 00:15:20,738
when I was locking up my bike.
377
00:15:20,738 --> 00:15:22,322
They trick you
by running sideways.
378
00:15:22,322 --> 00:15:24,697
[ Door closes ]
Wow. These are almost as nice
379
00:15:24,697 --> 00:15:26,405
as the crabs I got
from your sister. [ Laughter ]
380
00:15:26,405 --> 00:15:28,113
- I don't have a sister.
- You have any girl cousins?
381
00:15:28,113 --> 00:15:29,988
- Yeah.
- Then it works.
382
00:15:29,988 --> 00:15:31,697
[ Laughter ]
Where were we? Oh, yeah,
383
00:15:31,697 --> 00:15:33,655
I believe this is mine.
384
00:15:33,655 --> 00:15:35,947
Again?
Seriously?
385
00:15:35,947 --> 00:15:38,238
Oh, you'll have a chance
to win it back.
386
00:15:38,238 --> 00:15:41,738
- Five card stud.
- Look what I found in my tree --
387
00:15:41,738 --> 00:15:44,113
some delinquent Keebler Elves.
388
00:15:44,113 --> 00:15:46,905
Dad, you can't just barge in
on a man's tree house.
389
00:15:46,905 --> 00:15:48,155
I could've legally
shot you.
390
00:15:48,155 --> 00:15:51,280
[ Grunts ]
My tree, my rules.
391
00:15:51,280 --> 00:15:55,197
- Hi, Mr. Cleary.
- Stay for a while, son.
392
00:15:55,197 --> 00:15:58,530
I'm hurt you didn't invite me
to your party.
393
00:15:58,530 --> 00:16:00,363
You'll note mine's
a cream soda.
394
00:16:00,363 --> 00:16:02,405
I-I was planning on doing some
scissor lifting later.
395
00:16:02,405 --> 00:16:05,238
You do realize gambling's
illegal in this state?
396
00:16:05,238 --> 00:16:08,488
T-True, but we're 14 feet
off the ground,
397
00:16:08,488 --> 00:16:10,405
so technically,
we're subject to astronaut law.
398
00:16:10,405 --> 00:16:12,363
Davey: We don't always play
for money, Mr. Cleary.
399
00:16:12,363 --> 00:16:14,238
A lot of the times,
Joey forgives our debts
400
00:16:14,238 --> 00:16:15,530
if we're able
to offer him a favor.
401
00:16:15,530 --> 00:16:17,655
I got him that scissor lift
from my dad's job site.
402
00:16:17,655 --> 00:16:20,572
Mm. Looks like you called in
a lot of favors.
403
00:16:20,572 --> 00:16:23,238
I see radial tires, olive oil,
404
00:16:23,238 --> 00:16:25,488
a wiggling sack of something.
405
00:16:25,488 --> 00:16:27,238
As a responsible father,
406
00:16:27,238 --> 00:16:29,363
there's only one way
for me to handle this.
407
00:16:31,113 --> 00:16:32,447
Deal me in.
408
00:16:32,447 --> 00:16:33,905
[ Chuckles ]
409
00:16:33,905 --> 00:16:34,697
Davey: Uh...
410
00:16:34,697 --> 00:16:36,738
♪♪
411
00:16:36,738 --> 00:16:39,572
Here's a little something
I call the "Cleary"
412
00:16:39,572 --> 00:16:42,197
because it's a...
413
00:16:42,197 --> 00:16:43,405
full house.
414
00:16:43,405 --> 00:16:46,655
Poor me
with only two pair...
415
00:16:46,655 --> 00:16:48,197
of the same thing.
416
00:16:48,197 --> 00:16:50,405
[ "Drunken Sailor" plays ]
That's better, isn't it?
417
00:16:50,405 --> 00:16:52,113
[ Laughs ]
418
00:16:52,113 --> 00:16:54,155
This feels like
a good stopping point.
419
00:16:54,155 --> 00:16:56,822
Because you have
all the money! [ Laughing ] Yeah!
420
00:16:56,822 --> 00:16:58,363
I mean, you're not
seriously keeping it?
421
00:16:58,363 --> 00:17:00,197
Uh, uh, your goal was to teach
me a lesson, right?
422
00:17:00,197 --> 00:17:02,072
Yeah, I like to get paid
for my lessons.
423
00:17:02,072 --> 00:17:04,030
I won this by cheating
fair and square.
424
00:17:04,030 --> 00:17:05,822
You cheated?
425
00:17:05,822 --> 00:17:07,905
Yeah.
[ Chuckles ]
426
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:11,530
But it's okay,
427
00:17:11,530 --> 00:17:14,822
because we're under
astronaut law.
428
00:17:14,822 --> 00:17:18,822
[ Switch engages ]
T-minus 10...9...
429
00:17:18,822 --> 00:17:22,322
8...7...
430
00:17:22,322 --> 00:17:24,530
It was finally show night.
431
00:17:24,530 --> 00:17:27,488
A battle royale between meand a cardboard boat.
432
00:17:27,488 --> 00:17:30,322
Fortunately, I had a secretweapon up my sleeve.
433
00:17:30,322 --> 00:17:31,822
[ Lighter clicking ]
434
00:17:31,822 --> 00:17:34,863
- Timmy, I need to talk to you.
- Uh, s-s-sure -- sure.
435
00:17:34,863 --> 00:17:37,238
I guess Mom isn't coming tonight
because of our fight.
436
00:17:37,238 --> 00:17:40,155
Sorry about that. I know how her
approval means a lot to you.
437
00:17:40,155 --> 00:17:42,113
I think I understand now
what it's like for you,
438
00:17:42,113 --> 00:17:43,905
doing something
that inspires you
439
00:17:43,905 --> 00:17:47,113
while other people crap on it
and try to hold you back.
440
00:17:47,113 --> 00:17:49,072
Other people like me.
441
00:17:49,072 --> 00:17:50,863
You have been
one of my harshest critics.
442
00:17:50,863 --> 00:17:52,697
You and that smug
second grader
443
00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:54,405
who writes those reviews
for the school paper.
444
00:17:54,405 --> 00:17:56,280
Well, she's a hack.
445
00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:57,613
Good luck tonight.
446
00:17:58,863 --> 00:18:00,530
Frank.
447
00:18:02,155 --> 00:18:04,780
I asked Dad to show us
his home movies last night
448
00:18:04,780 --> 00:18:07,280
so Mom would find out and stop
you from doing the show.
449
00:18:07,280 --> 00:18:09,530
I was jealous of your set
for upstaging me.
450
00:18:09,530 --> 00:18:12,572
I'm sorry.
That's okay.
451
00:18:12,572 --> 00:18:14,780
If you hadn't done that, I might
never have stood up to Mom.
452
00:18:16,030 --> 00:18:17,113
I can't believe
you were jealous.
453
00:18:17,113 --> 00:18:19,030
No one's ever been
jealous of me before.
454
00:18:19,030 --> 00:18:21,322
Except for Mrs. Strausser,
who raves about my skin.
455
00:18:21,322 --> 00:18:23,988
I'm not proud
of what I did, Frank.
456
00:18:23,988 --> 00:18:25,488
Mostly because
it didn't work.
457
00:18:25,488 --> 00:18:28,738
[ Both laugh ]
458
00:18:28,738 --> 00:18:31,905
Seriously, I wish it hadworked. I hated that damn boat.
459
00:18:31,905 --> 00:18:35,488
♪ Ol' man river ♪
460
00:18:35,488 --> 00:18:39,030
♪ Dat ol' man river ♪
461
00:18:39,030 --> 00:18:41,905
[ Horn blowing ]
♪ He mus' know sumpin' ♪
462
00:18:41,905 --> 00:18:45,988
♪ But don't say nuthin' ♪
463
00:18:45,988 --> 00:18:49,405
♪ He jes' keeps rollin' along ♪
Dr. King did not march for this.
464
00:18:49,405 --> 00:18:51,822
Just picture
those shin guards.
465
00:18:51,822 --> 00:18:54,697
[ Applause, cheering ]
466
00:18:59,780 --> 00:19:01,197
[ Door closes ]
467
00:19:01,197 --> 00:19:03,780
♪♪
468
00:19:03,780 --> 00:19:06,613
I brought
Dad's projector back.
469
00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:08,780
Didn't go to the cast party
with your new theater friends?
470
00:19:08,780 --> 00:19:12,405
Meeting up in some coffee house,
wear berets, and play bongos?
471
00:19:12,405 --> 00:19:14,447
They're mostly
just a soccer team.
472
00:19:14,447 --> 00:19:15,988
We had orange slices
at intermission.
473
00:19:18,363 --> 00:19:19,947
I brought you this.
474
00:19:19,947 --> 00:19:21,655
A program from the show.
475
00:19:21,655 --> 00:19:23,030
They put my name in there.
476
00:19:26,197 --> 00:19:29,405
Some of what you said
last night...
477
00:19:29,405 --> 00:19:30,572
might be true.
478
00:19:32,655 --> 00:19:36,363
About me sometimes
holding you back.
479
00:19:36,363 --> 00:19:38,447
Then again,
it's only natural.
480
00:19:38,447 --> 00:19:40,072
Every parent wants their
children to end up
481
00:19:40,072 --> 00:19:41,863
just a little less happy
than they are.
482
00:19:41,863 --> 00:19:43,447
I'm not sure
that's universal, Mom.
483
00:19:43,447 --> 00:19:46,655
What do I know?
I grew up in a different time.
484
00:19:46,655 --> 00:19:49,488
Expectations for girls
weren't set that high.
485
00:19:49,488 --> 00:19:53,405
And I met your father, and then
along came all you kids.
486
00:19:53,405 --> 00:19:55,947
Eight needy nails in my
hopes and dreams coffin.
487
00:20:00,530 --> 00:20:04,238
But I guess I could try to be
a little bit more encouraging.
488
00:20:06,155 --> 00:20:07,947
Let you boys march out
into the world
489
00:20:07,947 --> 00:20:09,905
with sky-high expectations.
490
00:20:09,905 --> 00:20:12,780
And if they don't work out,
I'll be here for you.
491
00:20:12,780 --> 00:20:14,905
To come crawling back to.
492
00:20:14,905 --> 00:20:16,613
To tell me I was right.
493
00:20:16,613 --> 00:20:19,155
Or if they do work out,
494
00:20:19,155 --> 00:20:21,655
we can come back
to say thank you.
495
00:20:24,447 --> 00:20:25,947
I love you, Mom.
496
00:20:25,947 --> 00:20:28,363
[ Scoffing ]
497
00:20:28,363 --> 00:20:29,738
That word.
498
00:20:29,738 --> 00:20:31,572
You're probably starving.
499
00:20:31,572 --> 00:20:34,072
I'm gonna heat you up
a Hungry-Man dinner.
500
00:20:34,072 --> 00:20:37,863
It's a new one --
Mexican enchiladas.
501
00:20:41,855 --> 00:20:44,503
Hey, you see that one?
Sure.
502
00:20:44,503 --> 00:20:46,128
X-27 Lancer.
503
00:20:46,128 --> 00:20:48,503
Any idea how many Gs
that baby's pulling?
504
00:20:48,503 --> 00:20:50,545
I don't know. 3?
505
00:20:50,545 --> 00:20:51,628
A million?
506
00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:57,128
{\an8}What's this nonsense?
507
00:20:57,128 --> 00:20:59,253
{\an8}Barry's Barnstormers
was supposed to be up next.
508
00:20:59,253 --> 00:21:03,128
{\an8}These look like the movies that
William took of Timmy's show.
509
00:21:03,128 --> 00:21:06,503
{\an8}Geez Louise,
this looks amazing!
510
00:21:06,503 --> 00:21:10,420
{\an8}It's not the "Crowned Clowns
of the Air," but...not bad.
511
00:21:10,420 --> 00:21:12,836
{\an8}Well, we all knew Timmy
had a dose of creativity,
512
00:21:12,836 --> 00:21:14,961
{\an8}but it looks like
we have a second son
513
00:21:14,961 --> 00:21:18,295
{\an8}with a budding talent.
Huh.
514
00:21:18,295 --> 00:21:21,461
{\an8}I'm thinking William could
really be a filmmaker one day.
40567
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