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1
00:00:01,002 --> 00:00:02,604
- Summer: Bye, mom! Bye, dad!
- Morty: Drive carefully!
2
00:00:02,628 --> 00:00:03,796
Have fun, you two.
3
00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:06,465
Yes, we will have as
much fun as possible on our...
4
00:00:06,549 --> 00:00:08,593
Titan/c-themed getaway.
5
00:00:08,676 --> 00:00:10,469
Lefslose the 'tude, please.
6
00:00:10,553 --> 00:00:12,263
It's supposed to be romantic.
7
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:14,586
Speaking of disasters, dad,
we are leaving you in charge.
8
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:16,267
I know, c—can we wrap this up?
9
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:18,603
Morty and I have some
synthetic laser eels
10
00:00:18,686 --> 00:00:19,812
oxidizing in the garage.
11
00:00:19,896 --> 00:00:21,480
Hey, don't blow me off.
12
00:00:21,564 --> 00:00:23,316
I am drawing a line, okay?
13
00:00:23,399 --> 00:00:25,526
Any damage to this house
or these children
14
00:00:25,610 --> 00:00:27,570
when we get back, and...
15
00:00:27,653 --> 00:00:29,614
N-No more adventures with morty.
16
00:00:29,697 --> 00:00:31,782
Aw, geez, Rick, if my mom's
the one saying it,
17
00:00:31,866 --> 00:00:33,784
then you know it's pretty
serious this time.
18
00:00:33,868 --> 00:00:35,328
- Both: That's right.
- Wait. What?
19
00:00:35,411 --> 00:00:37,330
Listen, you have
my word as a caregiver,
20
00:00:37,413 --> 00:00:39,248
everything's gonna be fine.
21
00:00:39,332 --> 00:00:41,959
And if not, like you say, no
more adventures or whatever.
22
00:00:42,043 --> 00:00:43,753
It's like that old song
23
00:00:43,836 --> 00:00:45,796
"blomp blomp-a noop noop
a—noop noop noop."
24
00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:48,049
Y-You guys know that song?
From tiny rogerts?
25
00:00:48,132 --> 00:00:49,634
You never heard of it?
26
00:00:49,717 --> 00:00:52,094
You know, the black effeminate
guy from the '50s?
27
00:00:52,178 --> 00:00:53,596
No-nobody?
28
00:00:53,679 --> 00:00:55,640
A-All right, whatever.
Look, who cares?
29
00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:57,767
Just go on your stupid trip.
30
00:00:57,850 --> 00:01:00,186
Not one thing out of place.
31
00:01:03,481 --> 00:01:06,150
Not a single thing.
32
00:01:16,577 --> 00:01:18,412
Well, we're past
the point of no return.
33
00:01:18,496 --> 00:01:19,872
I'm going to have a party.
34
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:54,407
Summer: I found jello. Can you
sneak your mom's vodka?
35
00:01:54,490 --> 00:01:56,742
Yes, she does.
I saw it in your laundry room.
36
00:01:56,826 --> 00:01:59,578
Listen, you can't both be
in denial about it.
37
00:01:59,662 --> 00:02:01,247
- Okay, bye.
- Summer!
38
00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:03,374
You can't throw a party!
Remember what mom said?
39
00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:04,834
Yeah, if anything
gets messed up,
40
00:02:04,917 --> 00:02:06,237
you and grandpa Rick get
punished.
41
00:02:06,294 --> 00:02:07,479
I'm only a human being, morty.
42
00:02:07,503 --> 00:02:09,463
Rick, tell summer
she can't have a party!
43
00:02:09,547 --> 00:02:11,382
Uh, summer, you can't
have a party.
44
00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:13,050
Because
45
00:02:13,134 --> 00:02:14,719
I'm having
a party, b—i-i—i-itch!
46
00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:16,595
Oh, what?! Rick, you can't!
47
00:02:16,679 --> 00:02:18,639
What do you mean
you're having a party?
48
00:02:18,723 --> 00:02:20,683
Are some glip glops
from the third dimension
49
00:02:20,766 --> 00:02:22,810
going to come over
and play cards or something?
50
00:02:22,893 --> 00:02:24,020
"Glip glop?“
51
00:02:24,103 --> 00:02:25,747
you're lucky a traflorkian
doesn't hear you say that.
52
00:02:25,771 --> 00:02:27,315
Is that like their n-word?
53
00:02:27,398 --> 00:02:29,042
It's like the n-word
and the c-word had a baby
54
00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:30,985
and it was raised by
all the bad words for Jews.
55
00:02:31,068 --> 00:02:32,862
Listen, I think the
three of us could just,
56
00:02:32,945 --> 00:02:34,840
you know, have a nice
time, like, just hanging out,
57
00:02:34,864 --> 00:02:36,584
and, you know, doing
a little bonding and...
58
00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:38,326
Screw that. This is my chance...
59
00:02:38,409 --> 00:02:40,161
To gain some footing
with the cool kids.
60
00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:42,621
That's why you party?
Boy, you really are 17.
61
00:02:42,705 --> 00:02:44,790
- Why do you party?
- To get...
62
00:02:44,874 --> 00:02:46,959
Wr—wriggedy
wriggedy wrecked, son!
63
00:02:47,043 --> 00:02:49,837
Just keep your Sci-Fi friends
away from my awesome ones.
64
00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:52,131
Yeah, and you keep your
awesome friends away
65
00:02:52,214 --> 00:02:54,508
from my canapes.
66
00:02:54,592 --> 00:02:57,636
After dinner, 77'z'an/02will
attach to the rail system
67
00:02:57,720 --> 00:02:59,013
near our replica iceberg,
68
00:02:59,096 --> 00:03:00,890
and the hydraulics
encased in these tubes
69
00:03:00,973 --> 00:03:03,726
will execute a controlled sink
into the icy depths.
70
00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:05,770
A rail system seems archaic
71
00:03:05,853 --> 00:03:08,356
for an attraction this
impressive.
72
00:03:08,439 --> 00:03:10,232
Are you sure the ship will sink?
73
00:03:10,316 --> 00:03:11,901
I can assure you the ship
will sink,
74
00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:13,819
as it has a thousand
times before.
75
00:03:13,903 --> 00:03:17,531
- It is UN-unsinkable.
- Ooh!
76
00:03:17,615 --> 00:03:19,784
Look, it's the line for the bow!
77
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,660
Jerry, I'd love to just
kick back
78
00:03:21,744 --> 00:03:23,496
with a Margarita and read.
79
00:03:23,579 --> 00:03:25,515
Do you mind if I skip the whole
"king of the world" bit?
80
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:27,541
Well, it's not
the "king of the world" bit.
81
00:03:27,625 --> 00:03:28,793
That's Jack and fabrizio.
82
00:03:28,876 --> 00:03:31,087
This is where Rose says,
"I'm flying, Jack!"
83
00:03:31,170 --> 00:03:32,505
But whatever.
84
00:03:32,588 --> 00:03:33,774
I can be the only one
to do it alone.
85
00:03:33,798 --> 00:03:35,883
Well, what about her?
Excuse me, ma'am.
86
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:37,968
Would you like to take
my place in line?
87
00:03:38,052 --> 00:03:40,346
I, uh —- I could get
into trouble.
88
00:03:40,429 --> 00:03:42,139
We won't tell.
89
00:03:42,223 --> 00:03:45,267
So... you're a titan/c fanatic?
90
00:03:45,351 --> 00:03:47,603
Oh, yes. I've worked here
since it opened,
91
00:03:47,686 --> 00:03:49,814
but I've never been able
to participate.
92
00:03:49,897 --> 00:03:51,732
Happy to help... Rose.
93
00:03:51,816 --> 00:03:53,484
! Giggles I
94
00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:55,486
I love watching bukkake.
95
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:57,756
I mean, like, I don't know if!
Personally would ever do it...
96
00:03:57,780 --> 00:03:59,740
- Brad! Hey!
- Yo.
97
00:03:59,824 --> 00:04:02,284
Brad is here! Quick, make
my hair look drunk.
98
00:04:02,368 --> 00:04:04,787
Check it out.
Tammy's already drunk.
99
00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:07,498
Cool.
100
00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:09,542
The beacon was activated.
101
00:04:09,625 --> 00:04:12,378
- Who is in danger?
- Ugh! Grandpa!
102
00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:13,921
Birdperson!
103
00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:15,673
I am pleased there is
no emergency.
104
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,425
Oh, there's an emergency, ahnght
105
00:04:17,508 --> 00:04:18,968
a pussy emergency!
106
00:04:19,051 --> 00:04:20,845
When's the last time
you got laid, 'pers?
107
00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:24,306
It has been a... challenging
mating season for birdperson.
108
00:04:24,390 --> 00:04:26,434
Then it's time to get
your beak wet tonight, player.
109
00:04:26,517 --> 00:04:28,578
Go have some fun out there
birdp... bird... birdperson.
110
00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:30,604
Oh, man, how many
people did you invite, Rick?
111
00:04:30,688 --> 00:04:35,067
Uh... people? Mm, six.
112
00:04:35,151 --> 00:04:37,319
Yo! What up, my glip glops?!
113
00:04:37,403 --> 00:04:38,863
Oh, man!
114
00:04:41,282 --> 00:04:43,784
Oh!
115
00:04:43,868 --> 00:04:46,662
Y—y-you know there's
a garbage, right?
116
00:04:48,289 --> 00:04:49,957
Hey, uh, what the hell?!
117
00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,810
Ooh. That's why you never
invite a floopy doop
118
00:04:51,834 --> 00:04:55,004
and a shmoopy doop
to the same party.
119
00:04:57,965 --> 00:04:59,758
Oh, oh, 9...
Oh, that's disgusting!
120
00:04:59,842 --> 00:05:01,122
You guys are in my parents' bed!
121
00:05:01,177 --> 00:05:03,095
Oh. Sorry.
I'm not feeling too well.
122
00:05:03,179 --> 00:05:05,222
I just needed to lie down
for a bit.
123
00:05:05,306 --> 00:05:07,600
Oh. Okay. S-S-Sorry.
124
00:05:09,477 --> 00:05:11,312
Oh, my god! Are you kidding me?!
125
00:05:11,395 --> 00:05:14,940
The thing people don't
realize about the gear wars
126
00:05:15,024 --> 00:05:18,235
is that it was never really
about the gears at all.
127
00:05:18,319 --> 00:05:20,070
Uh-huh. Yeah.
No, no, to-totally.
128
00:05:20,154 --> 00:05:21,572
Rick, you gotta stop —-
129
00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,282
morty! Have you met gearhead?
130
00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:24,909
- Hey, how's...
- Morty here, he -...
131
00:05:24,992 --> 00:05:26,792
He would love to hear
all about the gear wars.
132
00:05:26,869 --> 00:05:29,705
How familiar are you
with the gear wars, exactly?
133
00:05:29,788 --> 00:05:31,624
Uh... not at all.
134
00:05:31,707 --> 00:05:33,626
Oh, boy. I envy you.
135
00:05:33,709 --> 00:05:37,963
Okay, it was about
754 years ago...
136
00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:47,389
Oh, hey, morty! H-Have you met
my buddy scropon?
137
00:05:47,473 --> 00:05:48,724
Not again, Rick.
138
00:05:48,807 --> 00:05:50,809
That last guy droned on for
20 minutes, you know?
139
00:05:50,893 --> 00:05:52,704
And meanwhile, the whole house
is being destroyed!
140
00:05:52,728 --> 00:05:54,539
Whoa, morty, this guy's
entire planet was destroyed.
141
00:05:54,563 --> 00:05:56,106
Have a little perspective.
142
00:05:56,190 --> 00:05:58,400
Hey, Rick, squanchy party, bro!
143
00:05:58,484 --> 00:05:59,860
Aw! Squanchy!
144
00:05:59,944 --> 00:06:02,071
Is there a good place for me
to squanch around here?
145
00:06:02,154 --> 00:06:04,406
Squanchy, you can
squanch wherever you want, man.
146
00:06:04,490 --> 00:06:06,450
Mi casa es su casa, dawg!
147
00:06:06,534 --> 00:06:08,953
All right! I like your squanch!
148
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:11,247
Uh, Rick, what exactly
is "squanching"?
149
00:06:11,330 --> 00:06:13,082
Morty, listen... we've had a lot
150
00:06:13,165 --> 00:06:14,893
of really cool adventures
over the last year,
151
00:06:14,917 --> 00:06:16,544
but it's time to relax.
152
00:06:16,627 --> 00:06:18,021
Yeah, if I relax now,
there might not
153
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:19,421
even be any more adventures!
154
00:06:19,505 --> 00:06:21,048
Jesus, morty, you're
bumming me out.
155
00:06:21,131 --> 00:06:22,776
Can't we just pretend like
everything's fine
156
00:06:22,800 --> 00:06:24,426
for a few hours,
enjoy ourselves,
157
00:06:24,510 --> 00:06:26,387
and then worry
about all this later?
158
00:06:26,470 --> 00:06:28,264
Yeah, that's easy
for you to say, Rick.
159
00:06:28,347 --> 00:06:30,266
You know, you like not
caring about stuff.
160
00:06:30,349 --> 00:06:33,894
You know, wh-wh-what's
in this for me?
161
00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:42,194
Jessica.
162
00:06:42,278 --> 00:06:43,988
Knock it off, slow mobius!
163
00:06:44,071 --> 00:06:45,823
Ha ha! Sorry, dude!
164
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:49,910
I'm just trying to show off
my powers, bro!
165
00:06:49,994 --> 00:06:51,579
I can't believe she's here.
166
00:06:51,662 --> 00:06:53,306
Well, what are you
doing standing here, morty?
167
00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:54,915
Go. Talk to her.
168
00:06:54,999 --> 00:06:56,309
Tonight, the only adventure
you're on
169
00:06:56,333 --> 00:06:58,085
is your cusping manhood.
170
00:07:01,005 --> 00:07:03,048
Oh, Rose.
171
00:07:03,132 --> 00:07:06,594
Wheel
172
00:07:06,677 --> 00:07:08,053
is that what I think it is?
173
00:07:08,137 --> 00:07:10,115
Yes, every couple gets
to re—create Jack's drowning
174
00:07:10,139 --> 00:07:12,016
at the end of the movie.
175
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:13,100
It's so romantic.
176
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,019
I can't wait to do
that with Beth.
177
00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:16,895
I don't know, Jerry.
With all due respect...
178
00:07:16,979 --> 00:07:18,957
It seems like your wife
may not be that interested.
179
00:07:18,981 --> 00:07:20,399
[Gasdsi look!
180
00:07:20,482 --> 00:07:22,693
Iceberg, right ahead!
The buffet is now closed.
181
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:26,030
Iceberg, right ahead!
The buffet is now closed.
182
00:07:26,113 --> 00:07:28,866
Uh, sir? There's not a problem.
183
00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:31,243
What do you mean
there's noz'a problem?
184
00:07:31,327 --> 00:07:33,203
The guidance system
isn't putting us
185
00:07:33,287 --> 00:07:34,955
on a direct collision course.
186
00:07:35,039 --> 00:07:37,958
This ship is about to completely
miss the giant iceberg!
187
00:07:38,042 --> 00:07:40,169
Well, do something!
Steer into it!
188
00:07:40,252 --> 00:07:42,421
I'm trying!
189
00:07:44,715 --> 00:07:47,051
It's too late.
Ladies and gentlemen...
190
00:07:47,134 --> 00:07:48,719
Don't brace yourselves.
191
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:51,639
Jerry: No! What happened?!
192
00:07:51,722 --> 00:07:53,932
Woman:
Their rail system must have failed.
193
00:07:57,144 --> 00:07:59,521
Totally gonna get laid tonight.
194
00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:01,190
I like your feathers.
195
00:08:01,273 --> 00:08:03,168
They are designed to attract
the attention of the female.
196
00:08:03,192 --> 00:08:04,735
It's working.
197
00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:06,403
Tammy, I should let you know
198
00:08:06,487 --> 00:08:08,739
I just got out of a highly
intense soul bond
199
00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:10,407
with my previous spirit mate.
200
00:08:10,491 --> 00:08:12,951
I'm not looking to get
into a soul bond.
201
00:08:13,035 --> 00:08:15,287
I'm just looking for...
202
00:08:15,371 --> 00:08:17,956
I believe birdperson can
arrange that.
203
00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:20,626
Hey, summer, haven't seen you
at flute practice in a while.
204
00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:22,628
Summer, don't tell me
you're friends with her.
205
00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:24,296
Are you kidding me?
206
00:08:24,380 --> 00:08:26,298
I don't even know
what she's doing here.
207
00:08:26,382 --> 00:08:28,300
Whoa. Not cool, summer.
This is a party.
208
00:08:28,384 --> 00:08:30,010
Everybody should be welcome.
209
00:08:32,638 --> 00:08:34,640
Oh, great. Who invited
abradolph lincoler?
210
00:08:34,723 --> 00:08:36,934
I thought everyone was welcome.
211
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,602
It's not the same, summer.
212
00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:40,145
Lincoler is a crazed maniac...
213
00:08:40,229 --> 00:08:42,064
Just a misguided effort
of mine to create
214
00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:43,787
a morally neutral
superleader by combining
215
00:08:43,816 --> 00:08:45,734
the DNA of Adolf Hitler
and Abraham Lincoln.
216
00:08:45,818 --> 00:08:49,697
Turns out it just adds
up to a lame, weird loser.
217
00:08:49,780 --> 00:08:52,366
Rick, you brought me
into this world,
218
00:08:52,449 --> 00:08:54,201
a suffering abomination
219
00:08:54,284 --> 00:08:57,037
tortured by the duality
of its being.
220
00:08:57,121 --> 00:08:59,164
But I shall finally know peace
221
00:08:59,248 --> 00:09:01,709
when I watch the life drain
from your wretched body!
222
00:09:01,792 --> 00:09:03,085
Whoa. What's up, man?
223
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:05,003
I have no quarrel with you, boy.
224
00:09:05,087 --> 00:09:06,839
"Boy"?
What's that supposed to mean?
225
00:09:06,922 --> 00:09:08,257
It's just —- i-look,
226
00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:11,135
I-I don't know how you thought
I meant it, but...
227
00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:12,511
Don't look at me, dude.
228
00:09:12,594 --> 00:09:14,972
Look, I'm
half-Abraham Lincoln, so -...
229
00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:17,224
So I should get on my knees
and kiss your ass?!
230
00:09:17,307 --> 00:09:18,892
Well, no, but...
231
00:09:18,976 --> 00:09:20,894
- You know?
- What do I know?
232
00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:23,605
That the third reich will reign
for a thousand years?
233
00:09:23,689 --> 00:09:25,816
- Leave him alone, Brad.
- Stay out of this, Jessica!
234
00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:28,152
Kick his ass, Brad!
Kick his ass!
235
00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:31,405
All: Kick his ass! Kick his ass!
236
00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:32,364
Brad!
237
00:09:32,448 --> 00:09:33,907
Stupid!
238
00:09:33,991 --> 00:09:35,617
Rick!
239
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,911
I just did you a favor, morty.
240
00:09:38,954 --> 00:09:40,581
Sorry about all that.
241
00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:42,207
Rick has some really
strange friends.
242
00:09:42,291 --> 00:09:44,752
Ugh! Brad is such a jerk.
243
00:09:44,835 --> 00:09:46,754
He's always trying to prove
what a man he is.
244
00:09:46,837 --> 00:09:50,299
I just want to find somebody
nice and sweet.
245
00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:53,427
Jessica, can I show
you something?
246
00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:57,556
- Wow! Look at all this stuff.
- Yeah.
247
00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:59,975
This is me and my grandpa Rick's
Sci-Fi workshop.
248
00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:01,560
Check this out.
249
00:10:03,479 --> 00:10:05,063
It's beautiful.
250
00:10:05,147 --> 00:10:07,065
You know, Jessica,
there's something
251
00:10:07,149 --> 00:10:09,234
I've always wanted to tell you.
252
00:10:09,318 --> 00:10:12,196
- What's that, morty?
- I think you're the most —-
253
00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:14,072
no, that... those weird sounds
254
00:10:14,156 --> 00:10:17,743
coming from the closet
over there.
255
00:10:21,705 --> 00:10:22,915
- Oh, my god!
- Aah!
256
00:10:22,998 --> 00:10:24,583
Hey, I'm squanching in here!
257
00:10:24,666 --> 00:10:26,543
Oh, my god!
Oh, that is so disgusting!
258
00:10:26,627 --> 00:10:29,129
Ow! Oh! Oh, crap!
259
00:10:46,897 --> 00:10:48,816
Huh. Big star in the sky.
260
00:10:48,899 --> 00:10:51,819
Oxygen-rich atmosphere.
261
00:10:51,902 --> 00:10:53,821
Giant testicle monsters.
262
00:10:53,904 --> 00:10:55,239
We'll be fine! Let's party!
263
00:11:02,371 --> 00:11:05,958
J” just shake that ass, bitch,
and let me see whatcha got j“
264
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:07,835
j” just shake that ass... j”
265
00:11:07,918 --> 00:11:10,254
summer: I swear to god, morty,
if it weren't for the fact
266
00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:12,137
that everyone's still
having a blast in there,
267
00:11:12,214 --> 00:11:14,091
I would be so furious
with you right now.
268
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:15,968
Oh, man. Y-You hear that, morty?
269
00:11:16,051 --> 00:11:17,931
You really lucked out
with summer o-on that one.
270
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:20,055
How are you guys not
freaking out right now?!
271
00:11:20,138 --> 00:11:22,683
T-The whole house is sitting
in another dimension!
272
00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:24,935
I-I mean, w-what the hell
are we supposed to do?!
273
00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:26,812
M-M-Mom and dad are gonna
kill us!
274
00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:29,273
- I'm losing it here, Rick!
- Relax, morty, relax!
275
00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,858
It's gonna be fine.
276
00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:33,151
All we have to do is go out
and find us
277
00:11:33,235 --> 00:11:34,653
some kalaxian crystals.
278
00:11:34,736 --> 00:11:36,655
Oh, shit, motherfucker!
279
00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:38,282
Kalaxian crystals, morty,
280
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:39,741
just a few miles south of here.
281
00:11:39,825 --> 00:11:41,285
Okay. Let's go, then.
282
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:43,263
W-W-We got to go get those
crystals right now, Rick.
283
00:11:43,287 --> 00:11:45,205
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Morty, I-I can't go with you.
284
00:11:45,289 --> 00:11:46,874
I got to hang back
285
00:11:46,957 --> 00:11:49,167
and make sure everything stays
cool here, you know?
286
00:11:49,251 --> 00:11:52,337
I mean, who knows what... what
if somebody breaks something?
287
00:11:52,421 --> 00:11:54,298
Yeah. Me too. I should stay.
288
00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:55,716
You guys have any aspirin?
289
00:11:55,799 --> 00:11:57,467
Oh, hey, morty, this is perfect!
290
00:11:57,551 --> 00:11:59,386
You can take lincoler with you.
291
00:11:59,469 --> 00:12:01,069
Hey, I'm not going anywhere.
I'm injured.
292
00:12:01,138 --> 00:12:02,764
Shut up, lincoler.
293
00:12:02,848 --> 00:12:05,058
It's the least you can do
for wrecking the living room.
294
00:12:05,142 --> 00:12:07,561
Yeah! And, Nancy,
you should go, too.
295
00:12:07,644 --> 00:12:09,479
What? Why... why me?
296
00:12:09,563 --> 00:12:11,815
Because, uh, you're...
297
00:12:11,899 --> 00:12:14,985
You're so good
at playing the flute.
298
00:12:17,112 --> 00:12:18,989
Captain:
Sorry for the inconvenience, folks.
299
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:21,158
We should resume sinking shortly.
300
00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:23,160
In the meantime, please,
stay on the ship
301
00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:26,038
and enjoy a complimentary plate
of James cameronion rings.
302
00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:28,206
Great. Not only is
the ship not sinking,
303
00:12:28,290 --> 00:12:30,083
but now the fourth wall
has been broken.
304
00:12:30,167 --> 00:12:33,211
I am gonna go back
to the room to finish my book.
305
00:12:33,295 --> 00:12:35,005
You should find that Lucy woman.
306
00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:36,214
But —- but —-
307
00:12:36,298 --> 00:12:38,216
You see, Jerry?
308
00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:39,885
May I show you something?
309
00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:41,511
Had everything gone as planned,
310
00:12:41,595 --> 00:12:43,221
this entire area
would be underwater.
311
00:12:43,305 --> 00:12:45,515
I would have liked to see it.
312
00:12:45,599 --> 00:12:48,185
This trip has been a "Titanic"
failure.
313
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:50,270
Get it? Ooh!
314
00:12:50,354 --> 00:12:52,522
- Draw me, Jerry.
- Oh, boy.
315
00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:54,232
Lucy, wow.
316
00:12:54,316 --> 00:12:56,944
Uh, this isn't
what! Had in mind.
317
00:12:57,027 --> 00:12:58,695
But it's the perfect moment.
318
00:12:58,779 --> 00:13:01,073
We've been dreaming
about this for 16 years.
319
00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:02,950
Um, not like this.
Not -— not with you.
320
00:13:05,035 --> 00:13:06,954
You are gonna draw me.
321
00:13:07,037 --> 00:13:10,123
Then you're going to fuck
me in that car over there.
322
00:13:10,207 --> 00:13:12,042
It's weird,
'cause I definitely think
323
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:14,044
that all men are created equal.
324
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,254
But, at the same time... - Okay!
325
00:13:16,338 --> 00:13:18,423
Um, the crystals should be
really close.
326
00:13:18,507 --> 00:13:19,967
There they are!
327
00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:22,844
Wait. Something's not right.
328
00:13:27,057 --> 00:13:29,101
Get the crystals!
I'll handle the beast!
329
00:13:29,184 --> 00:13:32,896
Prepare to be emancipated from
your own inferior genes!
330
00:13:34,523 --> 00:13:36,274
[Gasdsi
summer's gonna like me again.
331
00:13:43,031 --> 00:13:45,242
Lincoler, come on!
Let's get out of here!
332
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:47,911
Mein journey is over, morty.
333
00:13:47,995 --> 00:13:52,916
I have something
important to tell you.
334
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:56,503
J” and the gears, they turned
for a thousand years j”
335
00:13:56,586 --> 00:14:00,007
j” until the dark day
that they stopped j”
336
00:14:00,090 --> 00:14:02,009
[gasdsi Rick, I got them!
337
00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:03,427
I got the crystals!
338
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,095
All right! You did it, morty.
339
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:07,389
Rick, wait! There's something
you need to know.
340
00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:09,141
I couldn't have done it
without lincoler.
341
00:14:09,224 --> 00:14:10,493
He said that he was really sorry
342
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,144
and that he loves you
like a father.
343
00:14:12,227 --> 00:14:13,562
He only wanted you
to accept him,
344
00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:15,022
and he hopes that his final act
345
00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:16,440
would redeem him in your eyes.
346
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:18,942
He sacrificed himself to save
all of us, Rick.
347
00:14:19,026 --> 00:14:20,569
He died.
348
00:14:20,652 --> 00:14:22,362
Well, at least
he didn't die in vain.
349
00:14:22,446 --> 00:14:25,115
He got these crystals.
350
00:14:26,533 --> 00:14:28,493
And these babies just saved
this lame-ass party!
351
00:14:28,577 --> 00:14:30,037
Wubba, iubba, dub, dub!
352
00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:31,872
Play something.
S—somebody, play something.
353
00:14:31,955 --> 00:14:34,166
Wait a minute. What?
354
00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:40,088
J” put your right foot forward
and your left foot back j”
355
00:14:40,172 --> 00:14:42,841
j” then slide around like
on a nordictrack j”
356
00:14:42,924 --> 00:14:45,177
j” move to the left.
Step to the right j”
357
00:14:45,260 --> 00:14:48,930
j” wiggle your elbows, and look
up into the light j”
358
00:14:49,014 --> 00:14:51,183
j” it's the, it's the j”
359
00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:53,810
j” it's the Rick dance j”
360
00:14:53,894 --> 00:14:55,771
j” it's the, it's the j”
361
00:14:55,854 --> 00:14:57,647
j” it's the Rick dance j”
362
00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,441
slow mobius, hit me
with the clock beam!
363
00:15:04,446 --> 00:15:06,907
J” it's the, it's the j”
364
00:15:06,990 --> 00:15:08,158
j” it's the Rick dance j”
365
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:10,494
that's the Rick dance!
All right!
366
00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:11,912
Whoa, man!
367
00:15:12,996 --> 00:15:15,457
What the hell was that?!
368
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:17,460
I thought those crystals were
supposed to help us
369
00:15:17,501 --> 00:15:18,835
get home or something!
370
00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:21,088
What? No, no, no, I can get us home
whenever I want to.
371
00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:23,608
But, listen, speaking of those
crystals, can I get the rest of them?
372
00:15:23,632 --> 00:15:25,342
I'm starting to come down,
morty.
373
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:28,220
Crystal kalaxian is a really
strong, but fleeting high.
374
00:15:30,097 --> 00:15:32,015
That's what I think of your
crystals, Rick!
375
00:15:32,099 --> 00:15:33,850
Oh, morty, you idiot!
376
00:15:33,934 --> 00:15:36,186
Does anybody else have
any more k-lax?
377
00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:37,562
B-Birdperson? Uh, squanchy?
378
00:15:37,646 --> 00:15:39,231
Don't squaunch at me.
379
00:15:39,314 --> 00:15:41,525
All right, everybody,
party is officially over!
380
00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:43,527
Rick, take us home now.
381
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:45,904
All right, fine, morty,
you party pooper buzzkill!
382
00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:47,322
Boo, boo! Morty sucks!
383
00:15:47,405 --> 00:15:50,158
Boo! You suck,
whatever your name is.
384
00:15:50,242 --> 00:15:52,160
Rick:
Morty, you're the worst, morty.
385
00:15:52,244 --> 00:15:54,412
But these gears just
started turnin'.
386
00:15:54,496 --> 00:15:56,289
Lucy: Almost finished, Jerry?
387
00:15:56,373 --> 00:15:58,333
Uh, almost.
388
00:15:58,416 --> 00:16:01,628
I haven't quite captured
your beautiful eyes.
389
00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:03,380
I'm sure it's good enough. Move!
390
00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,048
Every weekend,
Jacks and roses have
391
00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:06,883
their titan/c experience
in this car,
392
00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:09,427
and I have to mop it up.
393
00:16:09,511 --> 00:16:12,305
The floor drops out
to make it easier.
394
00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:14,015
But now it's my turn.
395
00:16:14,099 --> 00:16:16,685
We're going to get it nice
and steamy in there,
396
00:16:16,768 --> 00:16:19,146
and I'm going to slam my hand
on the steam
397
00:16:19,229 --> 00:16:20,897
and leave a nice handprint,
398
00:16:20,981 --> 00:16:23,567
and then you're going to love
inside of me.
399
00:16:23,650 --> 00:16:25,443
No mess. No clean.
400
00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:28,446
Beth!
401
00:16:28,530 --> 00:16:31,032
Bet you're glad I think
kindles are dumb now.
402
00:16:32,534 --> 00:16:34,744
Beth: I can't help
but feel a little guilty.
403
00:16:34,828 --> 00:16:36,913
I didn't peg Lucy for a rapist.
404
00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:38,915
What does a rapist
look like exactly, Beth?
405
00:16:38,999 --> 00:16:40,917
Is it a slavic man
wearing a denim jacket
406
00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:43,587
with a patchy beard
and the scent of cheap champagne
407
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:46,298
wafting over his
blister-pocked lips?
408
00:16:46,381 --> 00:16:47,382
What?
409
00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:50,969
Well, at least you got
all this free stuff.
410
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:53,972
Should be enough to satisfy your
fifan/cjones for a while.
411
00:16:54,055 --> 00:16:56,600
I'm not going to fit.
412
00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:59,352
Beth, listen to me.
You're going to get outta here.
413
00:16:59,436 --> 00:17:01,062
You're gonna go on, and -...
414
00:17:01,146 --> 00:17:02,606
Jerry, just leave the door.
415
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:04,316
It's not a door, Beth.
It's debris.
416
00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:06,151
I don't care. Just leave it.
417
00:17:06,234 --> 00:17:08,945
Yeah. Okay.
418
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:16,494
"Cape fear"!
419
00:17:16,578 --> 00:17:18,079
"Cape fear"!
420
00:17:18,163 --> 00:17:20,081
I'm... I'm doing... i'm...
I'm going to do like
421
00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:21,625
from "cape fear."
422
00:17:31,092 --> 00:17:32,344
Squanchy: Hey, squanchers!
423
00:17:32,427 --> 00:17:34,888
The party's squanching on
at my place!
424
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:38,391
- Cool.
- I'm coming, too.
425
00:17:38,475 --> 00:17:40,268
Uh, no.
You're not squanchy enough...
426
00:17:40,352 --> 00:17:42,229
For a squanchy party. — what?
427
00:17:42,312 --> 00:17:43,939
Nancy told us
what a bitch you are.
428
00:17:44,022 --> 00:17:45,857
Guys, seriously. Nancy?
429
00:17:45,941 --> 00:17:47,776
Summer, you're a bad person.
430
00:17:47,859 --> 00:17:49,945
All you care about is having
popular people like you.
431
00:17:50,028 --> 00:17:51,947
That's not what
abradolph lincoler stood for.
432
00:17:52,030 --> 00:17:55,283
Well, i-it was hard to pin down
whathe stood for,
433
00:17:55,367 --> 00:17:58,745
but it's certainly not
what he died for.
434
00:18:01,081 --> 00:18:02,999
Next time I party,
I'm just gonna focus
435
00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:05,001
on getting totally wrecked.
436
00:18:05,085 --> 00:18:06,795
You're so wise.
437
00:18:08,630 --> 00:18:10,423
May I assist you with that?
438
00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:12,133
Uh, sure, yeah. Thanks.
439
00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:15,053
Morty, do you know what
"wubba iubba dub dub" means?
440
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:17,639
Uh, that's just Rick's
stupid nonsense catchphrase.
441
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:19,516
It's not nonsense at all.
442
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:21,768
In my people's tongue, it means,
443
00:18:21,851 --> 00:18:23,728
"I am in great pain.
Please help me."
444
00:18:23,812 --> 00:18:26,273
Well, I got news for you.
He's saying it ironically.
445
00:18:26,356 --> 00:18:28,358
No, morty.
Your grandfather is, indeed,
446
00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:30,402
in very deep pain.
447
00:18:30,485 --> 00:18:32,404
That is why he must numb
himself.
448
00:18:32,487 --> 00:18:34,197
- Come on, um...
- Birdperson.
449
00:18:34,281 --> 00:18:36,700
Come on, birdperson.
Rick's not that complicated.
450
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:38,618
He's just a huge asshole.
451
00:18:38,702 --> 00:18:41,246
Then why do you care so much
if you are no longer allowed
452
00:18:41,329 --> 00:18:43,248
to continue on your adventures
together?
453
00:18:43,331 --> 00:18:45,583
It appears fate has presented
you with an opportunity
454
00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:47,335
to free yourself of Rick
forever.
455
00:18:47,419 --> 00:18:49,963
You know what? You're right.
I shouldn't even care.
456
00:18:50,046 --> 00:18:52,590
This is probably the best thing
that could have happened to me.
457
00:18:52,674 --> 00:18:54,301
I'm sick of having adventures
with Rick.
458
00:18:54,384 --> 00:18:55,802
My people have another saying -...
459
00:18:55,885 --> 00:18:57,429
"Gubba nub nub doo rah kah."
460
00:18:57,512 --> 00:19:00,807
It means, "whatever lets you
sleep at night."
461
00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:03,268
Guys, mom and dad are, like,
462
00:19:03,351 --> 00:19:04,936
right around the corner.
463
00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:07,772
This is your moment, morty.
Choose wisely.
464
00:19:07,856 --> 00:19:09,149
Tammy!
465
00:19:09,232 --> 00:19:11,818
Caw!
466
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:18,283
Summer: Wow. We are so screwed.
467
00:19:18,366 --> 00:19:20,177
- Rick, wake up.
- Huh? What? Wait? What? Stop.
468
00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:21,745
Rick, you got to do
something quick.
469
00:19:21,828 --> 00:19:24,122
My parents are home.
470
00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:26,499
Uh, all... all right.
All right. Hold... hold on.
471
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:29,419
Ahh! So good.
472
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:30,646
Oh, my god. They're walking up
the driveway.
473
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,839
- Bring me the thing.
- What... what thing?
474
00:19:32,922 --> 00:19:34,507
The thing. The thing.
475
00:19:34,591 --> 00:19:36,277
It's got, like, buttons on it
and lights on it.
476
00:19:36,301 --> 00:19:37,761
- It... it... it beeps.
- Rick!
477
00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:39,405
That describes everything
in your garage!
478
00:19:39,429 --> 00:19:40,347
Do you mean this?
479
00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:43,975
Summer for for the win.
480
00:19:44,059 --> 00:19:45,602
All right, that should do it.
481
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:48,897
- Whoa! What did you do?
- Uh, s-see for yourself.
482
00:19:48,980 --> 00:19:50,607
Whoa!
483
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,484
Yeah, e-everything's
frozen in time.
484
00:19:52,567 --> 00:19:54,361
Yeah, and slow mobius thinks
he's all that.
485
00:19:54,444 --> 00:19:55,820
For how long?
486
00:19:55,904 --> 00:19:57,781
I don't know.
How long do you guys want?
487
00:19:57,864 --> 00:19:59,240
A week? A month?
488
00:19:59,324 --> 00:20:02,869
Can we start cleaning the house
and see how we feel?
489
00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:27,867
- Rick: Worst movie ever.
- Summer: Dumb.
490
00:20:27,936 --> 00:20:29,312
Ooh, boy, what a waste of time.
491
00:20:30,897 --> 00:20:32,732
Get it?
You know, 'cause it's frozen.
492
00:20:32,816 --> 00:20:34,567
This has been so much fun.
493
00:20:34,651 --> 00:20:36,403
Hey, Rick.
You know, this whole time,
494
00:20:36,486 --> 00:20:38,071
I haven't once
heard you say that
495
00:20:38,154 --> 00:20:39,799
"wubba iubba dub dub" thing
that you usually say.
496
00:20:39,823 --> 00:20:41,199
Don't need to.
497
00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:42,992
I have a new catchphrase.
498
00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:44,828
Oh, yeah?
What —- what's that, Rick?
499
00:20:44,911 --> 00:20:46,996
- I love my grandkids.
- Both: Aww.
500
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:48,873
Psych! Just kidding...
My new catchphrase is,
501
00:20:48,957 --> 00:20:50,917
"I don't give a fuck!"
502
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,920
J” just shake that ass, bitch,
and let me see whatcha got j”
503
00:20:54,003 --> 00:20:56,881
j” just shake that ass, bitch,
and let me see what you got j”
504
00:20:56,965 --> 00:20:58,758
roll credits!
505
00:20:58,842 --> 00:21:00,802
J” just shake that a... j”
roll the credits! Go!
506
00:21:00,885 --> 00:21:03,138
J” just shake that ass j”
that's the end of season one!
507
00:21:03,221 --> 00:21:05,056
That's the end, motherfucker!
508
00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:07,350
"I don't give a fuck" is
my new catchphrase!
509
00:21:07,434 --> 00:21:08,810
Fuck you!
510
00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:10,854
That's season one! Boom!
511
00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:13,731
Season one up in your face,
motherfucker!
512
00:21:13,815 --> 00:21:14,816
Yeah!
513
00:21:47,724 --> 00:21:49,601
Revenge.
514
00:21:49,684 --> 00:21:51,603
What?!
515
00:21:54,355 --> 00:21:56,983
Man: Party!
516
00:21:57,066 --> 00:21:58,526
Whoo, baby!
517
00:21:58,610 --> 00:22:02,238
Lincoler: Please, stop!
518
00:22:02,322 --> 00:22:03,615
Hey, brah!
519
00:22:03,698 --> 00:22:05,617
I don't understand.
Are you enjoying this?
520
00:22:05,700 --> 00:22:07,368
Do you like this?
521
00:22:07,452 --> 00:22:09,370
Yeah, you know it, dawg!
522
00:22:11,164 --> 00:22:12,499
Whoo, baby!
523
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,460
Did you get any of that?
524
00:22:15,543 --> 00:22:17,504
It's a good-a show!
36754
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