All language subtitles for H.H.S03E04.The.Grandpa.Grenade.1080p.HDTV.x264.CRiMSON.77729_track1_[eng]

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Original subtitles

- My family believes that honesty is the best policy,

but... Now, with all this grandpa business,

they're acting like it's less of a policy and more of a guideline.

Only less of a guideline and more of a suggestion.

You know what, honestly, it's possible they've forgotten the phrase altogether.

- Holly hobbie inc, official social media update report.

Ready? - Yeah.

- Video views up 5000, subscribers up 250,

followers up 2000.

(chuckles) - 2000?!

- They all loved your beauty teardown video. So we'll build on that.

Holly? I'm getting weird vibes through the phone.

- Sorry, it's um...

Recognized the logo?

- Ah, your until recently dead grandpa.

- My still dead to me, but actually quite alive grandpa?

(chuckles) yeah.

He started dropping over, trying to make up for lost time or something.

I'm team grandma though, so...

I don't even want to be in the same room as him.

Which is why I am still outside.

(intriguing music)

- hey, ma.

Uh, you called before...?

Oh, uh...

I must've been watching tv...

- And now my dad is having to lie to my grandma

because she doesn't know that grandpa's back in our lives.

- Maybe I had the volume up really loud.

Well, I'm sorry for worrying you.

Bye, ma.

- Hey. How are you feeling?

Wanna get outside?

Take a spin around the yard, see how your berries are doing?

(chuckles)

- I should go check on heather.

And then have my third nap before noon, it's a record.

- See? This is way too stressful for him.

How is my dad supposed to heal with all this?

My grandpa's to blame,

so I'm gonna let him know that he's not welcome here anymore.

♪ you and me run to a different beat ♪

♪ we are brave lead the way lead the way ♪

♪ be the you inside ♪

♪ and watch the world take flight ♪

♪ we are brave lead the way lead the way ♪

♪ be the change ♪

♪ be the change ♪

♪ gotta be the change ♪

- we're all clear.

- Hurry!

- So it's real. - Very real, I told you.

We win a game and we celebrate in style.

- Whoa! Extra sour gummy worms.

You can't even get these in collinsville.

- I know, but my grandma can order them for me from chicago.

And it only cost me two weeks' worth of allowance.

- Hey! Whoa!

There's my big winner.

Dipping into the secret stash, huh?

- I have to celebrate. Your cut.

- Don't tell your mother.

So, tell me about the big game?

I hear you struck out seven batters.

- And she got a diving catch. - Wow!

Wish I could've been there.

Must've been the new glove I got you, huh?

Just imagine how good it'll be when we break it in.

Catch you later.

(birds chirping)

- my new glove, it's gone! - What? How?

Gloves don't just walk away.

- Maybe it didn't walk home with us.

- You were out of our lives for the past 25 years.

Now could you please just go back to doing... That?

No! Okay, come on, holly.

Strap-on your big girl pants and tell your grandpa what's up.

Ahem!

- Holly!

Oh wow, what a surprise.

I'm excited to see you.

I was hoping-- I didn't reach out to you

because I didn't want to pressure you.

And now I'm rambling like a teenage girl.

No offense.

What I'm saying is, uh...

It's nice to see you.

I'm sorry about all the mess here, but what made you stop by?

- Is that acoustic from the '60s?

(chuckles) - yep.

This is my baby.

Brazilian rosewood, spruce neck.

I busted the headstock awhile back,

but I just glued it back on and it seems good as new.

(strums)

you wanna give it a spin?

(strums)

sounds better in your hands.

Hey, can I show you a little trick?

You're buzzing on this barred f.

If you put your fingers like this,

the base is an a but it still makes an f chord

and it's way easier.

(holly strums) (chuckles)

it's a bit of a cheat,

but I won't tell anybody if you don't.

(laughing)

(bright music)

- hey, slugger!

Rise and grind, am I right? Come here, sit down.

I thought we could get a head start on breaking in your mitts

before your next game.

- I actually have to be, um... At school early this morning.

- Oh, okay. I'll just take the glove and I'll get start--

- no, I need it for class. - Really?

- Yeah, we're throwing baseballs back and forth

to learn about parabolas.

- Man, school's a lot more fun than when I was a kid.

Alright, well, I guess we can start on it tonight.

Have a good day.

- Okay, quick, I need ideas for something to do tonight.

- Um, how about a movie? - Too romantic.

- Uh... A trip to the library? - Way too boring.

- Hey, quick question, you know I have soccer, right?

Should I be jealous? - No, silly.

I reconnected with my grandpa.

And we're trying to think of ideas of things that we could do together

to get to know each other. - Yeah, your zombie grandpa.

- He's not a zombie.

- What else do you call someone who came back from the dead?

(phone vibrating) - oh, amazing!

He's hosting a bonfire with some of his old friends and he wants me to come.

- That sounds pretty epic. - Three hot cocoas.

One invitation to come and watch the bachelor tonight.

- I would love to! (coughing)

- ooh, grandma, I think I'm coming down with something

and we have so much homework to do.

- Yeah, big science project. - English midterm.

- Yeah, every subject, pretty much.

- It's okay, we can watch two episodes next week.

- Okay.

(sighs)

- if he's such a great guy, why are you lying to your grandma?

- It's complicated. - I know it is.

She pretended he was dead for your whole, entire life.

- Ooh, maybe he's in a cult. - He's not in a cult.

He's an apiarist. - Or, that's just his cover story

and he's really an international assassin.

- Or, maybe he's just a really cool, misunderstood grandpa.

You guys really don't think that's possible?

- That glove cost 150 bucks!

My family can't afford to replace it.

And I can't tell my dad I lost it! He'll be crushed.

Robbie, we need to el-say more m-jay, pronto.

- El-say... You have to help me out, I flunked spanish class?

- Jam! Can we sell more jam? I need to make money.

- Sorry, she still hasn't got back to me yet.

- Fine, can I have 150 bucks then?

(laughs)

- you really are my funniest sister.

- What am I gonna do?

- I guess you're gonna have to sell your own blood.

- Do people do that? To who?

- To vampires, duh. They love that stuff.

Not helpful.

- Actually, maybe it is.

- But don't you need your blood?

- Yeah, but you know what I do have that people love

and I could sell?

(together): My secret candy stash!

- It's perfect. Everyone at school will go wild for it.

- Yeah, but are you allowed to do that?

- Anything's allowed if you don't get caught.

(guitars playing)

- that's a lot of strangers, are you sure I'm not intruding?

I mean, if so, I can--

- you're starting to sound like you don't trust me.

- Bob hobbie,

I have all your albums with the banshees.

Could I get a picture? - Sure.

- Okay. - Come on in.

- Thank you.

- Is that charlie wilson from the narrows?

- Why? Is he dangerous?

- No, he's pretty famous, actually.

- Charlie, this is my granddaughter, holly.

She's something of a musician herself.

- Oh yeah, I've heard your stuff and I dig it.

Keep it up. Thanks.

- I guess you didn't expect your granddad to be such a big deal, did you?

- I still have a few questions, though.

- Okay, shoot.

- Why did you run out on your family?

You disappeared when dad was my age.

I can't imagine.

- We had a lot of challenges, your grandma and me.

But I just didn't bail.

- So you didn't abandon them?

- I had a chance to go on tour.

She said if I went, not to come back.

- So you just left?

- It was my dream.

Heck, I figured

I'd become a rock star, prove her wrong,

win her back.

It just didn't happen.

- Grandma never told us any of that.

- She also said I was dead, right?

- Hey, bob, you've gotta get in on this, come on.

- Well, only if my granddaughter can too.

- Thank you.

- See if you remember this one.

Three, four.

(gentle music)

♪ I feel the morning rain ♪

♪ something in the air's telling me I've gotta leave again ♪

♪ 'cause I've got a home and I'll always have my friends ♪

♪ but I can't help chasing the wind ♪

♪ so I pack my bags for any destination ♪

♪ I don't care which way I'll hit the tracks ♪

♪ 'cause I know when this train's gonna ♪

♪ leave the station I'll wave goodbye ♪

♪ and I won't look back ♪

(chuckling)

- step right up, step right up and get your never before

seen in collinsville candy!

- Ta-dah.

Get it before it's gone for the rock-bottom price of 5$.

You wanna experience the once in a lifetime wonders

of a smores chocolate bar that is wicked?

Yeah, that's right, marshmallows, chocolate and graham crackers

in a single, tiny package. - Teacher's coming.

- Okay, um.

And that is how we're going to bring the woolly mammoth back to life.

Okay, who's ready to enter flavour country?

Thank you, there you go. Thank you.

- I think I may have the coolest grandpa in the world.

He's funny, shreds on the guitar, people love him.

- Then why am I getting waves of sadness, despair,

existential dread? I'm much better at reading auras in person.

- Well, for one, we still have to keep it hidden from my grandma.

And two...

I don't know who's the bad guy anymore.

What if it's grandma?

- Or maybe there is no bad guy?

My mom does not get along with my dad,

but he's still a great dad to me, you know?

They can both still be good people. - Hi, there!

Some homemade soup for you. You're feeling better?

- Yeah, a little.

Hey, I was just, um... Wondering.

What was grandpa like?

Am I like him?

- Ah, well, um...

He loved music and he had a lot of big dreams.

So I guess you're a little bit like him.

Why the sudden curiosity?

- Oh, um...

(phone vibrating)

- you're gonna get that?

(chuckles)

(song playing)

I've always loved that song.

Who are you singing with? Is that--

uh, I have to go, I've got...

Reservations at calico.

(car door closing, engine revving)

- plus side, you look amazing.

And this charles guy has a ton of followers.

- Downside...

I might've just blown up my entire family.

Okay, what do I do? What do I do?

- It's not your fault. - How?

Grandma's gonna find out that grandpa's back in our lives,

and that my dad's been lying to her.

- Holly, it's not your mess.

You're not the one who's lied to you for your entire life.

- But my family's all so stubborn they're not gonna fix this on their own.

And they're all just gonna yell and fight,

and it's gonna be so stressful for my dad.

- So what, you're gonna lock them in a room

until they kiss and make up?

- Yes. - Yes?

- Yes! - No!

- Yes, no, amy think about it!

My grandma wouldn't have had that kind of reaction

if she still didn't have some kind of feelings, right?

- Wrong. - Okay, name some things from the '70s.

- I don't like where this is going.

- Roller skates. They might break their hip. Disco?

Oh, and what about that fabric that doesn't really breathe

and it makes you all sweaty? - Yes, polyester.

Holly, what is this list?

- My grandpa told me what it was like when they first got together.

When they were still in love.

If I can just recreate that feeling--

- they'll what, get back together?

Holly, the chances of that happening are...

Incalculable.

They've hated each other for a quarter century.

They're not just gonna fall back in love because you feed them some jell-o

and play staying alive. - Jell-o, good one.

(sighs) amy, I at least have to get them to talk.

Because then, we can end all of the lies and tomfoolery.

What else am I supposed to do?

- Whoa, that was crazy.

I've never seen kids so energetic during history.

They were bouncing off the walls.

- Happy customers, my friend.

We made about like 60 bucks, so I bet if we wait in the bus lines,

we can probably get rid of-- oh.

Hi, teach. How is...

It going? - Ah, busted.

- Can I offer you some pumpkin spice m&ms?

- Let's go.

(bright music)

- so you were just taking money from school children?

- No, I was selling them a superior product.

Everybody knows that candy is way better than lunch.

- At an incredible mark up.

You were grifting them, heather.

You do know that's wrong, don't you?

Oh, this is all my fault. - What? No.

- Ever since the accident, you've been pulling away.

- I haven't been pulling away.

- I've been trying to help you to break in the glove

and you've been avoiding me like the plague.

It's because I can't play catch anymore?

- No!

(sighs)

it's because I lost the glove.

- You mean this guy?

- What? Where was it?

- Uh-uh-uh. Right here.

You must have left it here when mom drove you home.

- So you knew about this the entire time

and you just let me sweat it out?

- Well, we haven't really been talking.

(sighs) - I'm sorry, dad.

- It's okay, kiddo.

I'm just glad you weren't avoiding me.

- Never.

Uh, so does this mean I'm not grounded?

- No, you're still grounded.

But while you are,

I'll teach you how to break in the glove.

- Ha ha! - Hey!

- Thank you.

(gentle music)

(knocking)

- robert, are you in there?

- Ahem!

- What on earth are you doing here?

- I got a call from holly.

- Robert needs a ride to physio. Me too.

That doesn't explain why does holly have your phone number

and why would anybody ever call you.

Or was this your little set up?

- What... Huh!

Believe me when I say I would be happy to never, ever see any of this again.

(scoffs)

I'll just go. - Oh, sure, run away.

Classic bob.

- Oh, you really want to hash this out?

(indistinct chatter)

- oh, my gosh. Amy, I think it's working!

It's totally working.

It's working, right? - I think they're yelling.

- Okay, but is it a good yelling or a bad yelling?

- Is there such a thing as good yelling?

- Oh, I see. So you just said I was dead.

Exactly how did I die?

- How did your music career die? - That ain't fair!

- Oh and it was fair to leave me alone with two little kids

with the farm to run? - No, but I'm back, and I want to help out.

- Oh, I've heard that before.

- You know I would've sent money if I could.

But I never had anything more than the shirt on my back.

- What, this ugly old thing?

- Oh!

- You know, you need to cool off.

- Oh, come on!

Okay, this conversation is over.

But you know, it would be a real shame

to let all of this food go to waste.

- Oh. (laughing)

(screams)

- oh, my gosh, amy! What do we do?

Should we stop this?

- I can't imagine us getting involved would improve the situation.

- Oh, this is bad. This is really, really bad.

- Ow! Ow!

- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

- Oh, um. - Dad! Dad, hey!

Dad! Hey, can you just look at the barn for a minute, please?

(groaning in the distance)

- what is happening?

- I totally messed up.

I was trying to get rid of grandpa but then,

I ended up liking him and then I accidentally

let grandma find out that he was back and so I tried to fix

that entire situation but I made the entire thing worse,

and I was just trying to relieve your stress, please don't hate me.

(laughing)

- oh, ow, ow.

- Does this mean you don't hate me?

- Oh, sweetheart,

I could never in a million years hate you.

I was so worried about grandma finding out about grandpa

that I think a food fight is not the worst-case scenario.

Hey, sweetie, at least you tried.

Which is more than I can say.

And now, the cat's out of the bag.

- The cat's also a total mess.

Maybe I should get the wet pack.

- Not my favourite words but, I am sorry.

Not for covering bob with casserole, he deserved that,

but for lying to you for so long.

- I'm really sorry too.

I should've told you that I was hanging out with him.

- No. No, no, no, don't be silly.

I mean, I'm obviously not ready to see him,

but deep down, he's not a terrible guy,

so if you want to have a relationship with him,

it's okay by me.

(relieved sigh) - good, because we already made plans to go shopping

to get some shirts that are a little less...

Covered in jell-o? (chuckling)

you know, I feel so much better now that the family

is finally living without lies.

I bet it'll help my dad recover faster too.

So, should we watch more bachelor?

Didn't we have like two more episodes to catch up on?

- For the sake of total honesty,

there's one more thing I should tell you.

You know, nate, the guy who runs the newspaper?

- Robbie's boss. - Yes.

And...

My boyfriend.

- Your what?

Okay, you know what, maybe it's more like

honesty is the best policy but somewhere hidden in the fine print

it says something like, "warning! Too much honesty

can really complicate your life."

(chuckles)

♪ so I'll pack my bags for any destination ♪

♪ I don't care which way I hit the tracks ♪

♪ 'cause I know when my train's gonna leave the station ♪

♪ I'll wave goodbye ♪

♪ and I won't look back ♪

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