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♪ Who put the
"glad" in gladiator? ♪
2
00:00:10,750 --> 00:00:12,083
♪ Hercules ♪
3
00:00:12,166 --> 00:00:14,542
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theater? ♪
4
00:00:14,625 --> 00:00:16,458
♪ Hercules ♪
5
00:00:16,542 --> 00:00:17,542
♪ Is he bold? ♪
6
00:00:17,625 --> 00:00:18,542
♪ No one braver ♪
7
00:00:18,625 --> 00:00:19,875
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
8
00:00:19,959 --> 00:00:21,959
♪ Our favorite
flavor, Hercules ♪
9
00:00:22,041 --> 00:00:24,041
- ♪ What a guy ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
10
00:00:24,125 --> 00:00:25,875
- ♪ Ask his friends ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
11
00:00:25,959 --> 00:00:26,875
♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
12
00:00:26,959 --> 00:00:29,291
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
13
00:00:29,375 --> 00:00:32,083
♪ Hercules ♪
14
00:00:32,166 --> 00:00:33,750
- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ No one's fool ♪
15
00:00:33,834 --> 00:00:35,291
♪ Now the boy's in school ♪
16
00:00:35,375 --> 00:00:36,750
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
17
00:00:36,834 --> 00:00:37,917
♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
18
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♪ And the nicest guy ♪
19
00:00:39,417 --> 00:00:40,834
♪ No complainin' ♪
20
00:00:40,917 --> 00:00:41,917
♪ He was a no one ♪
21
00:00:41,959 --> 00:00:43,709
♪ Zero, zero, give
him a quick deed ♪
22
00:00:43,792 --> 00:00:44,917
♪ He's our hero ♪
23
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:48,458
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
24
00:00:48,542 --> 00:00:49,542
♪ From zero to hero ♪
25
00:00:50,417 --> 00:00:51,875
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
26
00:00:52,834 --> 00:00:57,625
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
27
00:00:57,709 --> 00:00:59,417
Wait and see!
28
00:01:09,959 --> 00:01:12,417
OK, boys, I haven't got all day.
29
00:01:12,500 --> 00:01:14,542
Actually, I've got eternity.
30
00:01:14,625 --> 00:01:17,750
What am I talkin' about? I just
don't wanna spend it with you two.
31
00:01:17,834 --> 00:01:20,458
OK, so, how's the business, huh?
32
00:01:20,542 --> 00:01:23,375
Everything's coming up
lilies, your morbidness.
33
00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:25,375
You flame-kissing
little yutzes, ya.
34
00:01:25,458 --> 00:01:27,625
OK, details. Give me details.
35
00:01:27,709 --> 00:01:29,417
Our gift shop, Death 'n' Stuff,
36
00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:32,291
is boasting record profits.
37
00:01:32,375 --> 00:01:33,709
Uh, too many details.
38
00:01:33,792 --> 00:01:36,500
Let's just focus on our
core business, shall we?
39
00:01:36,625 --> 00:01:37,625
Dead people.
40
00:01:37,667 --> 00:01:38,667
Aah.
41
00:01:39,041 --> 00:01:41,667
We experienced a slight
decrease in new arrivals.
42
00:01:41,750 --> 00:01:43,458
That concludes our presentation.
43
00:01:43,959 --> 00:01:44,792
Back up.
44
00:01:44,875 --> 00:01:48,250
What was that about
"decrease in new arrivals"?
45
00:01:48,333 --> 00:01:50,834
Uh... heh heh... uh...
46
00:01:50,917 --> 00:01:54,375
It's, uh, not as bad as it
looks, your vindictiveness.
47
00:01:54,458 --> 00:01:58,417
Zero new dead people.
48
00:01:58,500 --> 00:02:01,166
Well, that's great.
That's just dandy.
49
00:02:01,250 --> 00:02:02,917
I told ya he wouldn't be mad.
50
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:06,333
Of course not. Can't
you appreciate irony?
51
00:02:09,417 --> 00:02:12,166
My business is dead people,
52
00:02:12,250 --> 00:02:14,500
and without dead people,
53
00:02:14,583 --> 00:02:17,125
my business is dead, people.
54
00:02:19,583 --> 00:02:21,583
Look, people die every day.
55
00:02:21,667 --> 00:02:24,000
They get sick, they
whine about it, they kvetch,
56
00:02:24,083 --> 00:02:26,083
But they die. Boom.
Ba-da-bing. Dead.
57
00:02:26,166 --> 00:02:29,583
So, if there's this rash
of wellness going around,
58
00:02:29,667 --> 00:02:31,667
I would like to know who or what
59
00:02:31,750 --> 00:02:33,750
ungodly force is behind it.
60
00:02:33,834 --> 00:02:34,750
Ooh.
61
00:02:34,834 --> 00:02:36,542
I am Hippocrates.
62
00:02:36,625 --> 00:02:38,000
I am a doctor.
63
00:02:38,083 --> 00:02:39,917
I cure the sick.
64
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,750
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
65
00:02:45,417 --> 00:02:46,792
I am Hippocrates.
66
00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,083
I am a doctor.
67
00:02:48,166 --> 00:02:50,250
I cure the sick.
68
00:02:51,166 --> 00:02:52,709
I am Hippocrates.
69
00:02:52,792 --> 00:02:54,250
I am a doctor...
70
00:02:54,333 --> 00:02:59,625
Hey, I have found my career.
71
00:02:59,709 --> 00:03:01,125
Thespian!
72
00:03:01,208 --> 00:03:02,309
So what do you think, Cassandra?
73
00:03:02,333 --> 00:03:04,208
You'd have to come
out of your shell.
74
00:03:04,291 --> 00:03:05,709
I really don't need Career Day.
75
00:03:05,792 --> 00:03:07,875
I know what my
career's gonna be.
76
00:03:07,959 --> 00:03:09,000
Hero.
77
00:03:09,083 --> 00:03:11,709
Heh heh. It's not
just an adventure,
78
00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:13,000
It's a job.
79
00:03:13,083 --> 00:03:14,500
Like the time Jason and me
80
00:03:14,583 --> 00:03:16,834
took down the Caledonian Boar.
81
00:03:16,917 --> 00:03:19,667
That bruiser had
big yellow tusks
82
00:03:19,750 --> 00:03:22,583
as big as javelins and eyes...
83
00:03:22,667 --> 00:03:24,500
What's a doctor?
84
00:03:24,583 --> 00:03:26,291
Well, a doctor is a...
85
00:03:26,375 --> 00:03:29,959
guy who sits by
himself at a booth
86
00:03:30,041 --> 00:03:32,959
because apparently
it would seem that...
87
00:03:33,041 --> 00:03:34,709
I don't know!
88
00:03:34,792 --> 00:03:36,000
Nice try.
89
00:03:36,083 --> 00:03:38,208
Doctor? Might as
well be a fig farmer.
90
00:03:38,291 --> 00:03:42,000
So, uh, how's business?
91
00:03:42,208 --> 00:03:44,834
You actually know what a doctor
is? You've heard of my work?
92
00:03:44,917 --> 00:03:47,750
Uh, no... on both counts.
93
00:03:48,750 --> 00:03:49,959
I am Hippocrates.
94
00:03:50,083 --> 00:03:51,500
I am a doctor.
95
00:03:51,583 --> 00:03:54,291
I cure the sick.
96
00:03:54,375 --> 00:03:57,417
I thought curing the sick was
something only the gods could do.
97
00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:58,333
And me.
98
00:03:58,417 --> 00:04:01,500
Now keep in mind,
this was a big pig.
99
00:04:01,583 --> 00:04:05,291
So we staked out the north
side olive grove... hmm...
100
00:04:05,375 --> 00:04:09,000
Ba-boom. Ba-boom.
Ya see? It's a pump.
101
00:04:09,083 --> 00:04:10,667
Excuse me, kids.
102
00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:13,667
Ooh. Well,
something's got his goat.
103
00:04:13,750 --> 00:04:16,291
Consumed by the
green-eyed monster.
104
00:04:16,375 --> 00:04:17,792
Nah, I think he's just jealous
105
00:04:17,875 --> 00:04:19,142
that Herc is talking
to that doctor guy.
106
00:04:19,166 --> 00:04:21,375
This is great. You
sound just like a...
107
00:04:21,458 --> 00:04:22,375
Hero.
108
00:04:22,458 --> 00:04:26,458
Phil, w-w-what's...
You, hero. Him, quack.
109
00:04:27,166 --> 00:04:28,959
No, Phil. He's a doctor.
110
00:04:29,041 --> 00:04:30,834
Pfft. That's a career?
111
00:04:30,917 --> 00:04:32,583
Might as well be a lawyer.
112
00:04:32,667 --> 00:04:33,667
Hey.
113
00:04:33,750 --> 00:04:36,458
But he cures sick people.
114
00:04:36,542 --> 00:04:38,667
Humph. I'd like to see that.
115
00:04:38,959 --> 00:04:39,959
Ooh.
116
00:04:41,792 --> 00:04:42,792
Phil.
117
00:04:43,667 --> 00:04:45,583
Ooh, acute subdural hematoma.
118
00:04:45,667 --> 00:04:47,917
We've gotta get
him to my hospital.
119
00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:50,458
We're off to the
hospital... Whatever that is.
120
00:04:50,542 --> 00:04:53,125
All right. Hold up, baby.
121
00:04:53,208 --> 00:04:55,041
We know what you're
thinking out there.
122
00:04:55,125 --> 00:04:58,542
You're thinking, "Mmm,
that girl looks fine."
123
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,667
You're thinking, "What's
so weird about a doctor?"
124
00:05:01,750 --> 00:05:03,667
The world's got so many.
125
00:05:03,750 --> 00:05:06,917
But, you see, in Herc's day,
honey, there just weren't any.
126
00:05:13,750 --> 00:05:15,000
Sterilize the forceps.
127
00:05:15,083 --> 00:05:17,917
I may need to transect his
post-infarctive corpus callosum.
128
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:19,083
Relax, my friends.
129
00:05:19,166 --> 00:05:22,834
My medical techniques are
state of the art. Leeches stat.
130
00:05:23,917 --> 00:05:24,917
Clear!
131
00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:28,000
Aah!
132
00:05:29,583 --> 00:05:32,291
Hands off the fur, buster.
133
00:05:32,792 --> 00:05:34,552
Let's go, Herc. I want
out of this nut house.
134
00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:36,208
Hmm.
135
00:05:36,291 --> 00:05:38,375
Uh, Phil, I thought I might
136
00:05:38,458 --> 00:05:40,000
stick around for a while.
137
00:05:40,083 --> 00:05:41,875
This is fascinating.
138
00:05:41,959 --> 00:05:46,625
Join me as I push the
envelope of medical science.
139
00:05:46,750 --> 00:05:48,583
The only thing I'm
pushin' is the door.
140
00:05:48,667 --> 00:05:50,375
Phil, w-w-what's...
141
00:05:50,458 --> 00:05:53,333
You know, I could
recommend a good veterinarian.
142
00:05:55,041 --> 00:05:56,208
I'm gone.
143
00:05:56,291 --> 00:05:58,000
Well, don't just
stand there, lad.
144
00:05:58,083 --> 00:06:01,834
Join me in the great
adventure called health care.
145
00:06:01,917 --> 00:06:03,125
Count me in.
146
00:06:03,208 --> 00:06:05,375
Icarus, you wanna
stick around for awhile?
147
00:06:05,458 --> 00:06:06,875
M-m-might be a good idea.
148
00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:10,083
♪ Used to be when you got sick ♪
149
00:06:10,166 --> 00:06:12,375
♪ You'd shrivel up
and die real quick ♪
150
00:06:12,458 --> 00:06:17,125
♪ There wasn't much
That anyone could do-o-o ♪
151
00:06:17,208 --> 00:06:19,709
♪ Ya had to leave
your tonsils in ♪
152
00:06:19,792 --> 00:06:22,291
♪ And stick close by
your Siamese twin ♪
153
00:06:22,375 --> 00:06:25,667
♪ But now those dark and
dismal days Are through ♪
154
00:06:25,750 --> 00:06:28,875
♪ Because a
different kind of hero ♪
155
00:06:28,959 --> 00:06:32,041
♪ Has just rolled into town ♪
156
00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:34,542
♪ For pains and
breaks and bellyaches ♪
157
00:06:34,625 --> 00:06:36,542
♪ He's good to have around ♪
158
00:06:36,625 --> 00:06:39,291
♪ Now Hercules is starry-eyed ♪
159
00:06:39,375 --> 00:06:43,875
♪ He thinks he'd like to
be A different kind of hero ♪
160
00:06:43,959 --> 00:06:47,959
♪ Just like Dr. Hippocrates ♪
161
00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:49,250
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
162
00:06:52,542 --> 00:06:54,375
You keep that
clean at all times.
163
00:06:54,458 --> 00:06:57,208
We don't want to risk
another middle eye infection.
164
00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:58,959
OK, Doc. See ya.
165
00:07:01,375 --> 00:07:05,709
That's the guy the boss wants
us to knock off. Let's get him.
166
00:07:05,792 --> 00:07:08,333
We can't. It's not our turn yet.
167
00:07:08,417 --> 00:07:10,041
Next. Mr. Smith.
168
00:07:10,125 --> 00:07:12,500
Mr. John Smith.
169
00:07:12,583 --> 00:07:13,959
Nope? Anyone?
170
00:07:14,041 --> 00:07:15,208
That's us.
171
00:07:16,041 --> 00:07:17,417
Coming through!
172
00:07:17,500 --> 00:07:19,620
Don't worry, sir. You'll
be feeling better in no time.
173
00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:21,000
- Ohh.
- Sorry about that.
174
00:07:21,083 --> 00:07:23,875
Hey, how come he
got to go ahead of us?
175
00:07:23,959 --> 00:07:25,667
We were here first.
176
00:07:25,750 --> 00:07:28,291
Oh, that man was
an emergency case,
177
00:07:28,375 --> 00:07:30,041
my impatient little patients.
178
00:07:30,125 --> 00:07:33,417
Emergency?
179
00:07:33,875 --> 00:07:36,417
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
180
00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:39,375
Hmm. A rowing accident, eh?
181
00:07:39,458 --> 00:07:42,792
We both feel so silly.
182
00:07:42,875 --> 00:07:43,875
I've seen worse.
183
00:07:48,959 --> 00:07:51,434
Doctor, come quickly.
There's a patient in the E.R.
184
00:07:51,458 --> 00:07:53,166
with a sniffling nose.
185
00:07:53,250 --> 00:07:55,875
Great Zeus! Prep
a crash cart stat.
186
00:07:55,959 --> 00:07:57,834
This is code blue. I
repeat... code blue!
187
00:08:03,291 --> 00:08:06,041
I have never felt so soothed.
188
00:08:06,125 --> 00:08:08,834
I forgot why we even came here.
189
00:08:08,917 --> 00:08:14,041
Could it possibly have
been to kill the doctor?
190
00:08:14,333 --> 00:08:17,041
You idiots. What
is that, cherry?
191
00:08:17,458 --> 00:08:18,458
Gimme a taste of that.
192
00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:21,792
Mmm. Nice. OK...
193
00:08:21,875 --> 00:08:23,709
The doctor is curing people.
194
00:08:23,792 --> 00:08:26,500
The business is going
to, well, you know, to here.
195
00:08:26,583 --> 00:08:30,000
But we're gonna fight back.
We're not gonna give up.
196
00:08:30,083 --> 00:08:30,917
Right?
197
00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:32,000
This looks good.
198
00:08:32,041 --> 00:08:35,041
An ouzo salesman
wanted. Salary plus dental.
199
00:08:35,125 --> 00:08:36,041
Hmm.
200
00:08:36,125 --> 00:08:37,125
Right?
201
00:08:37,208 --> 00:08:40,083
But, your viciousness,
this guy's good.
202
00:08:40,166 --> 00:08:42,917
Yeah. And now with
Hercules working with him...
203
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:47,750
Hercules? Oh, that's just great.
204
00:08:48,500 --> 00:08:51,500
Uh, sir, are-are you
being ironic again?
205
00:08:51,583 --> 00:08:52,810
Because it's
really hard to tell.
206
00:08:52,834 --> 00:08:54,667
Wait, wait, wait. This is great.
207
00:08:54,750 --> 00:08:56,834
Hercules always
wants to help people.
208
00:08:56,917 --> 00:08:58,917
Little humanity helper Hercules.
209
00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:02,166
Well, now he's gonna help me.
210
00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:06,375
He can help me
spread a little something.
211
00:09:06,417 --> 00:09:09,709
Left over from Pandora's box.
212
00:09:11,166 --> 00:09:12,834
I think Dr. Die-Little
213
00:09:12,917 --> 00:09:16,542
is about to be
"plagued" with troubles.
214
00:09:16,625 --> 00:09:18,792
Heh heh heh heh.
215
00:09:22,166 --> 00:09:23,500
Phil, where are you?
216
00:09:23,583 --> 00:09:24,583
Catch!
217
00:09:25,834 --> 00:09:28,709
OK, kid. Today we're
gonna really sweat it up.
218
00:09:28,792 --> 00:09:32,500
Primo hero stuff. Come on.
Come on. Get the iron out.
219
00:09:32,583 --> 00:09:34,000
Phil, I, uh...
220
00:09:34,083 --> 00:09:36,667
Isn't it great to be back doin'
what you were born to do?
221
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:39,750
I mean, Career Day is
fun, but a doctor? Pfft.
222
00:09:39,834 --> 00:09:43,000
Hah. Well, that's all out
of your system now, right?
223
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,000
Right?
224
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:45,417
Mmm, actually,
225
00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:48,750
I-I was gonna ask if
I could skip practice
226
00:09:48,834 --> 00:09:50,500
to help Hippocrates again.
227
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:54,208
You weren't planning anything
special for today, were ya?
228
00:09:54,291 --> 00:09:57,291
Oh, no, nothing too special.
229
00:09:58,750 --> 00:10:01,083
Kid, you already got a career.
230
00:10:01,166 --> 00:10:04,041
But, Phil, I'm in training
with Hippocrates, too.
231
00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:08,125
Just maybe to be a
different kind of... hero.
232
00:10:08,208 --> 00:10:10,542
Don't you dare
233
00:10:10,625 --> 00:10:12,792
use the "H" word for that guy.
234
00:10:12,875 --> 00:10:15,959
Yes. I just... Help!
235
00:10:16,041 --> 00:10:17,875
Help!
236
00:10:17,959 --> 00:10:20,125
We're gonna be smashed to bits.
237
00:10:20,208 --> 00:10:22,375
I have to save them. Hold on.
238
00:10:22,458 --> 00:10:23,458
I'm coming.
239
00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:35,083
Gaah! Sushi. Yuck!
240
00:10:35,166 --> 00:10:37,250
Don't blow our cover, stupid.
241
00:10:38,709 --> 00:10:40,500
Good work, kid. I'm proud of ya.
242
00:10:40,583 --> 00:10:42,792
Ya see? That's what
a real hero does.
243
00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:46,291
Ow, my neck! I think I broke it.
244
00:10:46,375 --> 00:10:47,750
My arm!
245
00:10:47,834 --> 00:10:49,917
It hurts.
246
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,041
Phil, I have to take
these people to the doctor.
247
00:10:52,125 --> 00:10:54,709
Hey, what am I, chopped
mutton? I'm a trainer.
248
00:10:54,792 --> 00:10:58,166
I can handle an injury
as good as any doctor.
249
00:10:58,250 --> 00:11:01,333
It's easy. Just a
little elbow grease
250
00:11:01,417 --> 00:11:04,750
and a little more elbow grease.
251
00:11:04,834 --> 00:11:06,125
Ahh...
252
00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:08,709
Walk it off, pops.
253
00:11:08,792 --> 00:11:11,000
I'm sorry, Phil, but these
people need Hippocrates.
254
00:11:11,083 --> 00:11:12,959
Grrr.
255
00:11:13,041 --> 00:11:15,875
I'll be back as soon as I
drop them off at the hospital.
256
00:11:20,750 --> 00:11:21,750
Heh heh heh.
257
00:11:46,166 --> 00:11:47,166
What's this?
258
00:11:47,250 --> 00:11:49,667
Oh, just a little plague.
259
00:11:49,750 --> 00:11:53,166
Compliments of Hades,
lord of the underworld.
260
00:11:53,250 --> 00:11:55,375
And you know what,
Jerkules? Bada-boom.
261
00:11:55,458 --> 00:11:57,375
I couldn't have
done it without you.
262
00:11:57,458 --> 00:11:59,458
You the man. Ho!
263
00:11:59,542 --> 00:12:03,250
Heh heh. The town is
gonna put up a statue to you,
264
00:12:03,333 --> 00:12:05,750
if there's anybody
left alive to build it!
265
00:12:05,834 --> 00:12:08,000
Hah! Gotta go. I'm
too hip. Can't stay.
266
00:12:18,500 --> 00:12:20,583
Incoming!
267
00:12:24,250 --> 00:12:25,458
Relax, mister.
268
00:12:25,542 --> 00:12:26,709
You'll live...
269
00:12:26,875 --> 00:12:30,083
Until that chariot accident
nine years from now.
270
00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:34,250
Doctor, there's an alert in
I.C.U. A patient's in danger.
271
00:12:36,375 --> 00:12:38,792
We have no time to lose. Fluids.
272
00:12:38,875 --> 00:12:40,041
Breathing's shallow.
273
00:12:40,125 --> 00:12:41,458
- Suction.
- Heart rate's slow.
274
00:12:41,542 --> 00:12:42,583
Mustard plaster.
275
00:12:42,667 --> 00:12:43,709
I'm losing the pulse.
276
00:12:43,792 --> 00:12:45,792
Come on. Come on.
277
00:12:45,875 --> 00:12:47,041
Live.
278
00:12:47,291 --> 00:12:49,041
Live, you idiot.
279
00:12:54,083 --> 00:12:55,583
We lost him.
280
00:12:55,667 --> 00:12:57,875
I lost him.
281
00:12:59,333 --> 00:13:02,834
Oh, yeah! We are
open for business.
282
00:13:02,917 --> 00:13:03,750
Yeah!
283
00:13:03,834 --> 00:13:04,935
It's a great day to be dead.
284
00:13:04,959 --> 00:13:06,000
Yeah.
285
00:13:06,083 --> 00:13:08,041
Ooh, yeah. Get down.
286
00:13:08,125 --> 00:13:10,417
Come on down. Ooh,
hey, come on down.
287
00:13:10,959 --> 00:13:14,375
♪ Ohh, what a shame ♪
288
00:13:14,458 --> 00:13:19,083
♪ Looks like Hades Is
back on top of his game ♪
289
00:13:19,166 --> 00:13:22,250
♪ Our boys could use a break ♪
290
00:13:22,333 --> 00:13:26,667
♪ Time out ♪
291
00:13:27,792 --> 00:13:29,583
I should've listened
to my mother,
292
00:13:29,667 --> 00:13:31,291
gone into fig farming.
293
00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:34,250
Who was I kidding to think
I could do what you do?
294
00:13:34,333 --> 00:13:37,166
Darn it, I'm a
hero, not a doctor.
295
00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:40,709
Hey, a pity party.
Oh, I love these.
296
00:13:40,792 --> 00:13:42,709
It's over, Icarus.
297
00:13:42,792 --> 00:13:45,083
I lost a patient.
298
00:13:45,166 --> 00:13:46,917
It was all my fault.
299
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:49,250
Oh, come on. You can't quit now.
300
00:13:49,333 --> 00:13:52,959
What about all those patients
in there who still need you?
301
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:57,458
Icarus, I... Don't
you "Icarus, I" me.
302
00:13:57,542 --> 00:13:59,750
Ya can't give up.
Sure, things look bad.
303
00:13:59,834 --> 00:14:01,166
Sure, the whole city's sick.
304
00:14:01,250 --> 00:14:04,083
Sure, you can't do a
ding dang diddly about it.
305
00:14:04,166 --> 00:14:08,625
But, you... uh... Whoa.
Now I'm depressed.
306
00:14:08,709 --> 00:14:10,959
He's right. We can't quit now.
307
00:14:11,041 --> 00:14:12,625
Oh, yes, we can.
308
00:14:12,709 --> 00:14:15,417
A true hero doesn't
give up without a fight.
309
00:14:15,500 --> 00:14:18,000
If his sword doesn't
work, he tries arrows.
310
00:14:18,083 --> 00:14:21,000
If arrows don't
work, he tries spears.
311
00:14:21,083 --> 00:14:24,750
Rule number 157.
Phil taught me that.
312
00:14:24,834 --> 00:14:27,417
Wait a moment. That's it.
313
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:30,875
I've been toying with
something radically new.
314
00:14:30,959 --> 00:14:33,291
It's called "medicine."
315
00:14:33,375 --> 00:14:34,750
Medi-what?
316
00:14:34,834 --> 00:14:36,709
Ach, what am I
saying? It's impossible.
317
00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:39,434
The ingredients are very rare.
They're scattered all over the world.
318
00:14:39,458 --> 00:14:41,375
Hey, that's my kind of job.
319
00:14:42,500 --> 00:14:44,583
OK, here's what I need.
320
00:14:45,166 --> 00:14:48,542
And that, honey, was the
world's first prescription.
321
00:14:48,625 --> 00:14:52,041
And it was the only
one that was ever free.
322
00:15:24,625 --> 00:15:26,166
Here ya go.
323
00:15:26,250 --> 00:15:29,792
Oh, great. Great. Excellent.
Excellent. Why the shark?
324
00:15:29,875 --> 00:15:31,792
It says right here
on your paper...
325
00:15:31,875 --> 00:15:34,291
"Eyes of a killer shark."
326
00:15:34,375 --> 00:15:36,959
Heh heh. No, you just
can't read my writing.
327
00:15:37,041 --> 00:15:39,542
It says, "Eggs
of a winter lark."
328
00:15:39,667 --> 00:15:40,834
See?
329
00:15:40,917 --> 00:15:44,959
Oh, I feel bad for
the shark. Hey!
330
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:47,291
Here goes nothin'.
331
00:15:54,375 --> 00:15:55,625
Ahhh!
332
00:15:55,709 --> 00:15:56,792
It works.
333
00:15:56,875 --> 00:15:58,625
We can cure the plague.
334
00:15:58,709 --> 00:16:04,375
Yes, but the battle's not won
until we cure all of Athens.
335
00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:40,667
Oh, ya did it, Doc!
336
00:16:40,750 --> 00:16:42,333
Ya stopped a plague!
337
00:16:42,417 --> 00:16:44,208
♪ You stopped a plague
N-n-no more plague ♪
338
00:16:44,917 --> 00:16:49,250
I know. Ha. And it took
every last drop of medicine.
339
00:16:49,375 --> 00:16:51,542
♪ N-n-no more medicine
N-n-no more medicine ♪
340
00:16:51,625 --> 00:16:54,166
Boy, I'd like to see
Hades' face now.
341
00:16:55,208 --> 00:17:00,041
How's this, Mr. Buttinski?
Huh? You like this face?
342
00:17:00,166 --> 00:17:01,959
Do ya? Good.
343
00:17:02,083 --> 00:17:04,500
♪ Hades is here, Hades is... ♪
344
00:17:04,583 --> 00:17:05,750
Ho.
345
00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:09,417
So, Doc, I hear you're
all out of medicine.
346
00:17:09,542 --> 00:17:10,917
And that's, hey, too bad,
347
00:17:11,041 --> 00:17:13,458
'cause I saved a little
smidgen of plague
348
00:17:13,542 --> 00:17:15,208
just for you.
349
00:17:18,625 --> 00:17:23,083
Physician, heal
thyself! Heh heh.
350
00:17:24,041 --> 00:17:26,083
OK, Doc, babe,
catch ya later, huh?
351
00:17:26,166 --> 00:17:28,291
Downstairs. You
know what I mean?
352
00:17:40,542 --> 00:17:43,750
Hello, Doc! Welcome
to my underworld,
353
00:17:43,834 --> 00:17:46,000
Home of eternal torment
since the dawn of time.
354
00:17:46,125 --> 00:17:47,125
How ya doin', babe?
355
00:17:47,166 --> 00:17:50,041
And let me be the first
to say, "Mahalo, aloha,"
356
00:17:50,125 --> 00:17:53,375
which means "Do you
prefer regular or extra crispy?"
357
00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:56,041
Nice. Hey, Doc, seriously.
You know what burns my butt?
358
00:17:56,166 --> 00:17:59,291
Little flame about that
high. Boom. Ha! Gotta go.
359
00:18:02,083 --> 00:18:04,291
You know, I could help
you with that cough.
360
00:18:05,375 --> 00:18:09,166
Phil, there you are. I need you.
361
00:18:09,250 --> 00:18:11,542
What's the matter,
run out of gauze?
362
00:18:11,667 --> 00:18:13,083
Phil, I'm late
363
00:18:13,166 --> 00:18:15,375
because I spread
plague all over the city.
364
00:18:15,458 --> 00:18:16,583
I had to help cure it.
365
00:18:16,709 --> 00:18:18,667
Sure. What's more important,
366
00:18:18,750 --> 00:18:22,959
The lives of thousands
or a coach's broken heart?
367
00:18:23,083 --> 00:18:24,834
Phil, come on.
368
00:18:24,917 --> 00:18:28,375
You made your
choice, Nurse-ules.
369
00:18:28,458 --> 00:18:30,500
I know what kind of
hero I was meant to be,
370
00:18:30,625 --> 00:18:34,000
and I need your help, coach.
371
00:18:36,583 --> 00:18:38,500
Sign me up, kid.
372
00:18:39,667 --> 00:18:42,250
Next time, remind me
to ask where we're goin'
373
00:18:42,333 --> 00:18:43,917
before I say, "Sign me up."
374
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:47,417
The River Styx. Oh, boy! Ooh.
375
00:18:52,959 --> 00:18:55,959
Be gone, mortals.
376
00:18:56,083 --> 00:19:00,500
None but the dead may ride.
377
00:19:00,625 --> 00:19:06,583
Say, pal, maybe you could bend
the rules a little for a peek at this.
378
00:19:06,959 --> 00:19:08,583
The Greekly World News?
379
00:19:08,709 --> 00:19:11,625
Oh, man, I haven't
seen the sports page
380
00:19:11,750 --> 00:19:13,630
since back when the
Giants were still in Sparta.
381
00:19:13,750 --> 00:19:14,834
Hop in!
382
00:19:18,583 --> 00:19:22,667
The Trojans still stink?
Those guys can't buy a break.
383
00:19:22,750 --> 00:19:26,291
What do you expect with that
lame-o Priam running the team? Ha.
384
00:19:26,542 --> 00:19:29,583
End of the line.
385
00:19:29,667 --> 00:19:30,709
This is it?
386
00:19:30,792 --> 00:19:33,500
It's the back way in. If
I took you any further,
387
00:19:33,625 --> 00:19:36,166
I might get in dutch with
the boss, know what I mean?
388
00:19:36,291 --> 00:19:39,083
No problem. Here,
keep the paper.
389
00:19:39,166 --> 00:19:42,041
All right! The funnies!
390
00:19:42,125 --> 00:19:46,375
Heh heh heh heh heh.
391
00:19:46,458 --> 00:19:47,792
Now what?
392
00:19:47,875 --> 00:19:51,834
- We climb. Shouldn't be a...
- problem.
393
00:19:51,959 --> 00:19:54,208
Isn't there an easier
way to get up there?
394
00:19:55,792 --> 00:19:57,792
Phil, if you need
help, just say so.
395
00:19:58,291 --> 00:19:59,458
Phil, what are you doing?
396
00:19:59,583 --> 00:20:02,083
I'm gettin' a pedicure.
What do ya think?
397
00:20:02,166 --> 00:20:04,208
Help!
398
00:20:04,291 --> 00:20:06,417
Oh, no. Anything but the furies.
399
00:20:08,458 --> 00:20:09,834
Whoa.
400
00:20:19,834 --> 00:20:21,208
Will ya hurry it up, kid?
401
00:20:21,291 --> 00:20:22,709
I'm runnin' out of wool here.
402
00:20:33,959 --> 00:20:35,542
Here, you drive.
403
00:20:40,041 --> 00:20:42,667
Great work, kid. Too
bad we're gonna get killed.
404
00:20:42,750 --> 00:20:44,291
Aah!
405
00:20:49,834 --> 00:20:52,166
Unh. Hades...
406
00:20:52,250 --> 00:20:54,583
In the name of all
that's good and decent,
407
00:20:54,667 --> 00:20:57,000
I demand that you
let Hippocrates go.
408
00:20:57,125 --> 00:21:00,166
Let him go? Take him, please.
409
00:21:00,291 --> 00:21:01,583
I'm pulling my flame out here.
410
00:21:01,709 --> 00:21:03,834
This guy is curing dead people.
411
00:21:03,917 --> 00:21:07,000
OK, I'm in the negative.
This is unprecedented.
412
00:21:07,083 --> 00:21:09,250
Get him outta here, please!
413
00:21:09,333 --> 00:21:11,500
Hippocrates, come on.
414
00:21:11,583 --> 00:21:14,375
Yeah, ya can ditch the
domain of the dead now.
415
00:21:14,458 --> 00:21:17,709
Please, they prefer to be
called the "life challenged."
416
00:21:17,792 --> 00:21:19,709
And they need a good doctor.
417
00:21:19,792 --> 00:21:23,208
But, sir, the-the
living need you more.
418
00:21:23,291 --> 00:21:26,709
Look, Doc, I had my doubts,
but you are a bona fide hero,
419
00:21:26,792 --> 00:21:29,166
And we need all the
heroes we can get.
420
00:21:29,291 --> 00:21:32,500
Your place is with us. That's
where you can do the most good.
421
00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:34,625
Yeah, but not too
much good, right?
422
00:21:34,709 --> 00:21:37,625
I mean, look, why don't ya just
take a day off once in a while?
423
00:21:37,709 --> 00:21:40,667
Relax a little. Wednesdays.
Take Wednesdays off. Boom.
424
00:21:40,792 --> 00:21:42,375
I wouldn't know what
to do with myself.
425
00:21:42,500 --> 00:21:44,166
Well, you'll relax.
Ya play a game.
426
00:21:44,250 --> 00:21:46,643
There's a new one. I'm gonna
invent it right now. What? Golf.
427
00:21:46,667 --> 00:21:49,417
Here, OK? You'll
love it. Golf. OK?
428
00:21:51,333 --> 00:21:53,625
Golf. Interesting.
429
00:21:53,750 --> 00:21:56,667
Oy, let's go, Doc.
430
00:21:56,750 --> 00:21:57,750
And that's not all.
431
00:21:57,792 --> 00:22:00,125
I got a ton of great
medical ideas for you, OK?
432
00:22:00,208 --> 00:22:01,834
Example... double billing.
433
00:22:01,917 --> 00:22:03,685
You get paid twice for
something you did once.
434
00:22:03,709 --> 00:22:05,875
It's great. And no
more house calls.
435
00:22:05,959 --> 00:22:09,041
You are an important
man. Let them come to you.
436
00:22:09,125 --> 00:22:12,000
Here's a great one. HMOs!
437
00:22:12,083 --> 00:22:14,333
Hey, you'll love it.
Come here. Come back.
438
00:22:14,417 --> 00:22:17,059
That's good. You have... that's
what a doctor should be... unavailable.
439
00:22:17,083 --> 00:22:18,583
Good-bye. I love ya. Good-bye.
31136
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