Original subtitles

HAPPY 80TH, DON HUMBERTO

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

I couldn’t sleep last night.

Alright…

How do people see me?

and today is a leader in the pharmaceutical industry

and feeds almost 10,000 families.

What do I care about that?

but with no prestige.

Well, through your foundation you’ve helped to set up projects…

Everyone knows what foundations are for.

That building is practically unused.

I’ve turned 80.

I want to be remembered differently.

I don’t know,

to do something that lasts.

A bridge, for example,

designed by a famous architect.

A bridge with my name on it.

To finance it, then donate it to the State.

The Humberto Suárez Bridge.

Or if not, a movie.

A movie?

You want to direct a movie?

No, you idiot, how can I direct a movie?

To finance a movie.

To be the maker.

So that people know I’m behind it.

But not any movie.

A great movie,

with a great director, famous actors,

with the best.

A movie.

What would it be about?

How should I know?

Lola Cuevas, the director.

She’s the most prestigious now.

She snaps up all the awards.

Highly prized by the critics.

She never grants interviews.

She’s kind of strange.

Remind me a bit about this project.

It’s all fine, we have the book rights.

despite loads of difficulties, which was expected.

They belong to different worlds.

Iván is the master actor, very prestigious,

and Félix is…

a worldwide star.

I’m interested in that tension, I think it’ll help us a lot.

And they’ve never worked together.

I don’t know…

I want the best.

Are they the best?

Better, worse…

wouldn’t use those terms to define an artist,

but I get your question

and the answer is yes, they’re absolutely the best for this.

Excellent.

- You really don’t want any? - No, you go ahead.

Well, getting the book wasn’t easy.

But that’s it.

We have it, it’s mine now.

You know I’ll do a very loose version of the novel, don’t you?

It was the first thing I said when they called me.

But there will be something of the book left?

It cost me a fortune.

Tell me,

what did you think?

It’s meant to be good, isn’t it?

It’s a Nobel Prize winner.

I’d love you to tell me what it’s about.

How do I tell you?

Rivalry is…

Alright then…

It’s the story of two brothers:

1970: a country town.

Manuel is driving his parents down a road.

It’s night and he’s drunk.

He loses control and the car rolls over and over.

Lucy says yes.

Manuel sinks into a terrible depression.

Then he finds out that Lucy is pregnant.

Manuel asks, almost begs to talk to his brother.

The brothers walk around the estate at night, in darkness.

Manuel apologizes to Pedro.

Pedro relents.

The brothers embrace and cry like children.

Because men do cry.

OFFICIAL COMPETITION

Maestro, we meet at last.

It’ll be a real honor to work with you.

Good luck, pal.

You’ll need it.

Sure.

Coats.

Thank you.

Go ahead.

Look, there she is.

Lola, good afternoon.

With all my notes.

I can’t stop.

How about we do a short exercise?

Okay.

a touch of the macho, aggression, nationalism…

He channels the primitive side,

joining other primates on the bleachers of the stadium.

I love the idea of two brothers forming a single entity,

but split into two bodies.

Look.

They try to lead their lives on different paths,

but an unexpected event puts them in opposition.

Yes, yes.

The fate of one is irrevocably linked to that of the other.

In fact, what happens to one,

- happens to the other, right? - Exactly.

When you go to the doctor,

you don’t need him to tell you his life story to believe him.

Well…

And it underestimates the actor, it underestimates our work.

- No, I don’t think so. - Yes.

There’s an exercise I do with my students.

I tell them that when they’re alone

to call themselves out loud.

For that very reason, to see and feel themselves from outside.

I want to return to what you said about the character,

that he doesn’t want children.

Do you have any Iván?

Sorry?

- Do you have any children? - Yes, yes.

but now it’s a little late.

- I would have liked to. - Okay.

but we do agree on the mediocrity of having children.

- Shall we read? - Yes, of course.

“The phone rings. It’s 11:30 at night. Pedro looks at the time and answers.”

- “Good evening.” - Once more.

“Good evening.”

Once more.

- “Good evening.” - Again.

“Good evening.”

Once more.

“Good evening.”

That’s it.

“Scene 2: exterior, night, road.

“Pedro reaches the scene of the crash.

Excuse me, Lola.

A small observation on this text.

Here the script says:

“What happened? What have you done, you fucking drunk?”

trying to understand the situation.

Later, yes…

as he gradually gets angrier,

he explodes at his brother,

but not…

Let’s go from where Pedro arrives at the scene of the crash.

“Sorry, sorry.

“Something ran in front of me, a dog or whatever…”

- Stop. Let’s stop for a moment. - Yes.

- One crucial thing that you know… - Yes.

A drunk tries not to look drunk, isn’t that right?

Then let’s…

How…?

Imagine your level of drunkenness

A 5.

Sorry, sorry.

Something ran in front of me, a dog or whatever…

Sorry, sorry.

Something ran in front of me, a dog or whatever…

- Nobody? - Nobody.

I believe you.

Alright, another one.

Some guy comes along and hits you square in the face.

Alright.

Because you stole his girlfriend or he just doesn’t like you.

- For whatever reason. - Okay.

- Okay. - Go.

- Slowly first, right? - Yes, in slow motion.

One at most.

So, if there’s anyone here

who’s not absolutely sure that they’re this chosen one,

people who turn the wheel, laborers who work,

but one thing it doesn’t need is more actors.

Does no one have any doubts?

No.

Yes.

Maybe.

This guy is in every fucking movie in this country. No.

Maybe.

No.

Yes.

No.

No.

No.

No way.

No.

No.

What a bland face. No.

This cross eyed one, maybe.

No.

No.

No.

No.

No.

Yes.

- Hey, he was a student of mine. - Really?

- Yes. Not much talent, poor guy. - Then no.

No, no, please, let him!

You don’t have to be a genius to sit without saying a word.

Take him, please.

- We’ll include him for you. - Thanks.

They are actors, aren’t they? I don’t want any surprises.

Yes, they’re all actors.

Poor guys.

- I’d keep… - Excuse me.

Apologies for Félix’s delay.

He had to see the doctor, but he’ll be here in a minute.

I warn you, he’s not in a good mood.

I don’t give a crap. And who is this?

Félix’s errand boy.

Come, come.

I’ll introduce you. Darío, Félix’s personal assistant, Iván.

He’s ready.

The issue is what I do with all these projectiles on me.

You won’t be doing this before every take, will you?

Action.

Mum and Dad would hate you if they were alive.

Don’t even say their names! You should’ve died in the crash.

Okay, stop. Let’s go back.

Here, Pedro bangs the glass hard.

He’s very upset, he starts to cry.

Do it, please.

What?

Your actions.

Do your actions. Cry, I want to see it.

There’s no need, I’ll do it in the take.

I can’t cry gratuitously, just like that.

Sure.

- Well, how do we do it? - That’s…

- Don’t try to do it well. - Okay.

Find the truth.

Hold on…

Give me a break, man!

This time I’ll let it go, but next time…

I swear I’ll smash that fools face in, eh?

When you get a film actor,

don’t get one who needs this whole circus.

Plus, he has an Argentinian accent. 20 years in Spain and he still has the accent.

He has no accent.

As if there weren’t Spanish actors who could play my brother.

There must be a hundred.

Come on, you still have time.

Paco Carrasco. A wonderful actor, wonderful.

Emilio’s very good too, eh?

He’s very good.

- What are you doing? - Nothing.

Don’t get side-tracked.

I thought you knew.

Why would I know that crap?

Is that true? It’s extraordinary.

It’s pretty wild.

Come on, let’s act.

Let’s go.

The link between these two brothers is broken now,

it has shattered.

But something is still alive, okay?

Let’s work on that, that impotence.

I’m your brother.

I’m all you have.

Mum and Dad would hate you if they were alive.

Don’t even say their names!

Don’t even say their names!

You should’ve died in the crash.

You.

- Thank you. - Very good.

You don’t have to smash a chair to show anger.

Anyway, in the end it turned out great.

I’ll tell you something. I’m sure we’ll make a great movie.

I hope so.

I can see us getting an Oscar in the Dolby Theater in Hollywood.

Your speech in English. You do speak English, right?

- No, not at all. - No?

Check out the lesbian-looking eyesore outside.

I bet you 100 euros she’s one of Lola’s girlfriends.

Done.

She writes children’s stories.

I’m sure you’ve heard her name. Violeta Valderrobles.

She’s famous in the circle of children’s writers.

It’s the story of a special child, an immigrant

who lives on the street and turns junk objects

into imaginary treasures that teach him something.

Don’t tell him the whole book.

and unjust world we live in.

I love it. Thanks a lot.

I’ll speak in Spanish.

I think is atrocious.

Why then have I come?

the weight of the law.

I don’t need that.

It’s not a need Iván,

it’s an exercise.

Come on, it’s only 5 tons.

Is this safe?

Are we ready?

Remember, you’re talking to a judge.

That image will haunt me my whole life.

Memories of horror.

Mum and Dad stretched out.

Let’s go again.

From “I didn’t see my brother”.

- Less. - But…

If I do any less, I’ll be doing nothing, Lola.

That’s the idea.

Say it from here.

I would rather have died

and they lived.

- Fake, I don’t believe it. - No.

Truth, I want the truth.

Resigned, disillusioned and distressed.

An accident I couldn’t prevent.

We’ve done three rehearsals. Six to go.

I never understood that. Nine seemed like very few.

Sorry, it’s the best I can do with my schedule.

Sure, but…

You always have to rehearse according to what the work requires.

Sometimes rehearsing too much can overcook the thing.

Too much, no, what’s necessary.

Don’t worry about it.

We’re rehearsing for nine days because that’s enough.

Lola, sorry, you’ve finished with the rock, haven’t you?

- Ready? - Got it.

- Straight to Instagram, eh? - Yeah, yeah.

Let’s go.

I’m sorry.

It all got terribly complicated.

The third time.

Lola, Diana is coming, but she’s with Mr Suárez.

You don’t say.

And to what do we owe the visit from our producer?

He’s bringing his daughter Diana. I told you she’s playing the role of Lucy.

That was true? I thought it was a joke.

He asked me, I did loads of tests and the girl’s great,

She’s in her place, she goes with the flow.

Action.

Okay, okay, okay.

Okay, okay, okay.

Tell me about it later.

So the idea is to fly on Tuesday the 21st.

In the morning, early.

Excuse me.

Lola, yes?

Yes.

Fine, I’ll put it on speaker.

It’s Lola.

Hi, guys, how are you?

I wanted to ask you a favour.

Iván, I like you more every day.

- I have to go. I have classes. - Fine.

gluten-free, all made in Spain.

Félix.

Félix.

Félix.

Here.

Look, this is it.

This one, this one.

Yes, he has money, but we have to imagine

what he thinks is refined, a rough, unrefined guy.

What does he think is refined? Not the art director. Got it?

I’ve got it. It’s about this man’s aspiration.

- Exactly. - Lola.

Iván should’ve come half an hour ago. I’ve called him three times.

- Call from my phone. - Yes.

Well, Susana, that’s it.

Check the notes, that’s why I spent seven hours looking at fabrics.

- Hello? - Iván, hello.

- Lola? - No, it’s Julia.

I’m calling from Lola’s mobile, my battery’s run out.

Sure.

Iván, you do remember that we start at 2 o’clock?

Yes, it’s in my diary,

but since I was made to wait in the last rehearsal

and the one before,

etcetera, etcetera,

today I’ll make them wait two hours to make up for it.

And I’m charging for it.

These are just some of them.

From right to left, the San Sebastián Silver Shell,

two Golden Globes,

the Volpi Cup from the Venice festival,

and two of my five Goyas.

The other three are in my home in Saint-Tropez.

Yours, Iván?

I don’t have nearly as many.

Obviously, I must be a much worse actor.

The Medal for Excellence in the Performing Arts,

a Max Award…

Trust, trust, guys.

I want you to lose all autonomy, all of it.

One is anchored to the other, and vice versa.

It’s one of the things I like most about the novel, if not the most.

The body as an enclosure,

a prison and a sentence,

where the skin is merely a casing, a vessel.

One.

Curtain!

No!

No!

No, not that, please!

Fucking bitch!

Not that!

Not that!

To transform, that’s the reason. It transforms.

Transform… I’ll turn your face into a Picasso!

Take it easy, Félix.

- 4310 Segurola and La Habana, 7th floor. - They’ll be there!

Félix’s lawyers demand that the destroyed awards are replaced

Fuck, “non-material damages”…

Let’s see?

Duplicates of the six you destroyed comes to 83,000 euros.

The day I got out, I wanted to go back to jail.

No, no.

- What? - No.

and you’re going to tell me how to do my fucking job?

Don’t fuck with me.

Let me do the scene once,

and if you don’t like it, you come and do it, eh, cutie?

Did you fight with your new call girl?

Okay, it’s fine, we all have bad days.

Yes.

- From the top. - Lola, Lola, wait. Iván…

I have something to tell you.

It’s very hard to say,

I don’t want to shake you up.

If there’s anything I don’t want, it’s to be pitied.

I’d better get to the point, come straight out with it.

Earlier this month

I have to have more tests,

but if they confirm what seems to be…

Maybe I can even channel this painful experience

to nourish my character.

Count on my help for whatever you want.

Thank you.

We’re going to make a fucking great film.

Forgive my mood swings and these outbursts, but…

this medication has got me…

kind of crazy.

Everything disturbs me and…

Julia.

DENTAL BLEACHING

Losing one of your actors as soon as you start shooting.

It’s horrible, yes.

It’s really tough.

Lola, sorry.

Félix’s mobile is off. He’s half an hour late.

Don’t call him again, my God.

If it gets worse…

We hope not, of course, we hope not.

Félix, how are you, honey?

It’s all fine, fine.

Did you rest up?

because the bitch wants to stay in my house in Saint-Tropez.

But she knows about your disease, right?

What disease?

Oh, no, no… the cancer thing?

No, she doesn’t because…

You destroyed something very fragile, Félix.

and I want to make this clear,

it’s objective,

It’s easy to see which one of us has the most talent.

You’re the master.

Pure banal entertainment,

That’s what I really think.

and as complex as that.

YOU’RE FIRED, YOU IDIOT

Is something wrong?

Excuse me.

Félix, Iván,

Lola just told me she’s not coming.

I’ll read the message.

“I’ll see them on Tuesday.”

Sorry.

Holy shit, man.

Holy shit.

Let’s not give this nutcase the satisfaction of a comment.

What a bitch.

Goddamn bitch.

- Wonderful. - Yes, it’s great, great.

Listen to that texture, the dirt in the background.

Where is he from?

He’s Canadian, but he lives in Düsseldorf.

He’s a performer as well.

Terrified. Terrified.

Genius.

Jerk.

Ridiculous.

Ridiculous.

Sorry, I didn’t want to interrupt, but they’re ready.

Idiot!

Ignoramus!

Ass kisser!

Go fuck yourself!

Double fuck yourself!

Fathead, filth!

Bastard!

Scumbag!

Shit eater!

Leech!

I shit on your teeth!

Triple fuck your fucking mother!

Nutjob!

Abortion!

Fuck your mother! I shit on your mother’s face!

Not me.

Not me, Iván Torres.

- That’s enough. - Take it easy.

I’d never hit an old man clearly in inferior shape.

Excellent.

Did you do something to your teeth? They’re very white.

You hesitate for a second.

Even if it’s too late, I wanted to apologize to you.

Hold it there.

And you always protected me, almost like a father.

I just want to…

tell you I’m sorry…

for everything.

Manuel, you paid your debt.

you had no bad intentions.

Don’t think it was easy for me to testify against you.

The truth is that, whatever happens,

we’re brothers.

Now!

Cap.

That’s it. The complete mutation.

Here the voice-over would come in.

Manuel took over the life of his brother.

The end.

Okay, cut.

Very good.

Rest up, we’ll be playing this loads of times.

I didn’t think it was that good.

You have to know it in your sleep.

Very good.

All three looking at the camera, please.

Shooting begins in two days.

I want to thank these great artists,

together for the first time!

Thank you, and make the best of films!

I was thinking

She’d die to get…

Even worse.

Indeed!

I’ll smoke with you.

Now I’m the face for a charity campaign

that makes houses for African refugees from discarded containers.

Just a second.

And in the name of “charisma” we have to endure horrible actors

Clearly, the film industry

is too generous, too generous.

Lola told me what they’re paying him.

- It’s grotesque. - Right.

I’m used to it.

But…

this individual, so to speak,

Anyway…

I think the main thing now is…

of airheads, whores and the corrupt.

You go.

It’s finished.

Well, I’ll get going.

Anyway…

Right then…

Yes, the Humberto Suárez Foundation.

It’s the third time I’ve called.

There’s a man…!

How many times do I have to call for a goddamn ambulance?

Next question.

You, please.

He’s the same, in a vegetative state.

The diagnosis is diff…

Thank you.

But others,