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1
00:00:08,733 --> 00:00:10,167
(Bobbi)
Driver, I'm dying in here.
2
00:00:10,233 --> 00:00:11,733
Can't you get the air
up a little bit?
3
00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:13,367
(Eliot)
Mom, don't call him driver.
4
00:00:13,433 --> 00:00:15,200
Yeah, they call
this security, this guy.
5
00:00:15,267 --> 00:00:16,867
Like, he's gonna
stop anybody, huh?
6
00:00:16,933 --> 00:00:18,600
Esther Baumgarten?
7
00:00:18,667 --> 00:00:21,000
No, no, that's my mother,
she's dead.
8
00:00:21,067 --> 00:00:23,267
Huh?
Dead! She's dead!
9
00:00:23,333 --> 00:00:24,767
Okay, go ahead.
10
00:00:24,833 --> 00:00:27,133
(Bobbi)
God, I needed to be
slapped in the face
11
00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:28,367
with this Vitamin D.
12
00:00:28,433 --> 00:00:30,133
I could feel
my mustache lightening.
13
00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,667
Yup, you told us
and the TSA guy.
14
00:00:32,733 --> 00:00:34,467
Oh, please, you're just grumpy
'cause you lost your luggage.
15
00:00:34,533 --> 00:00:37,033
Yeah, I got this
amazing suitcase
16
00:00:37,100 --> 00:00:38,800
that I saw
on Refinery29.
17
00:00:38,867 --> 00:00:40,133
It's the one that Drew
18
00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:41,700
Barrymore recommends.
Barrymore recommends.
19
00:00:41,767 --> 00:00:44,300
Oh, Eliot, I am so sorry
for your loss.
20
00:00:45,667 --> 00:00:47,300
(Bobbi)
It's insane that
you didn't carry-on.
21
00:00:47,367 --> 00:00:48,833
But, look, I had to check.
22
00:00:48,900 --> 00:00:50,767
I had my shampoo
and my conditioner.
23
00:00:50,833 --> 00:00:53,200
And it's made especially
for the humid...ity.
24
00:00:53,267 --> 00:00:54,833
Oh, yikes.
25
00:00:56,100 --> 00:00:57,067
Oh, I love it.
Oh, no.
26
00:00:57,133 --> 00:00:58,133
Welcome to Florida.
27
00:00:58,200 --> 00:01:00,633
America's droopy dick.
28
00:01:00,700 --> 00:01:03,100
* Four and three
and two and one-one *
29
00:01:03,167 --> 00:01:05,300
**
30
00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:09,233
(Bobbi)
You know what?
You could hold my purse.
31
00:01:09,300 --> 00:01:10,733
Oh, thanks.
32
00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:12,867
Ab, something I've meaning
to talk to you about.
33
00:01:12,933 --> 00:01:14,500
And I don't wanna offend.
34
00:01:14,567 --> 00:01:16,467
I really, really think
35
00:01:16,533 --> 00:01:18,967
you need to change your
profile picture on Facebook.
36
00:01:19,067 --> 00:01:21,500
You're not doing
yourself any favors.
Okay.
37
00:01:21,567 --> 00:01:22,800
Why are you guys even
friends on Facebook?
38
00:01:22,867 --> 00:01:24,067
What do you mean?
I'm friends with
39
00:01:24,100 --> 00:01:25,233
all your friends
on Facebook.
40
00:01:25,300 --> 00:01:27,133
And I got news for you.
They request me.
41
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:28,567
She's right,
I mean, I did.
42
00:01:28,633 --> 00:01:30,567
A couple of times,
actually.
43
00:01:30,633 --> 00:01:32,267
God, do you feel
this Florida sun?
44
00:01:32,333 --> 00:01:33,700
I am loving it.
45
00:01:33,767 --> 00:01:35,667
Bobbi Wexler!
Jesus!
Jesus!
46
00:01:35,733 --> 00:01:37,067
What, this?
47
00:01:37,067 --> 00:01:38,800
It's called "Stand
Your Ground," snowflakes.
48
00:01:38,867 --> 00:01:40,267
Hi, Eleanor.
49
00:01:40,333 --> 00:01:41,933
We're meeting
my sister upstairs.
50
00:01:42,067 --> 00:01:43,900
We're here to clean out Mom's
apartment before it's sold.
51
00:01:43,967 --> 00:01:46,733
These are my three
beautiful children.
52
00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:49,467
These are Esther's
grandchildren?
53
00:01:49,533 --> 00:01:51,933
Oh! Come, give me
a big hug!
54
00:01:52,067 --> 00:01:53,800
A group hug...
How nice to meet you.
55
00:01:53,867 --> 00:01:54,733
(gunshot)
Ahh!
56
00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,100
Damn it.
What? What?
57
00:01:56,167 --> 00:01:57,267
Fuckin' Florida.
58
00:01:57,333 --> 00:02:00,067
**
59
00:02:01,267 --> 00:02:02,533
Hello, hello, hello!
60
00:02:02,600 --> 00:02:05,067
Beverly Baumgarten,
we're here!
61
00:02:05,067 --> 00:02:06,167
Hi, there!
62
00:02:06,233 --> 00:02:07,500
(all)
Hi!
63
00:02:07,567 --> 00:02:09,767
Aunt Bev,
you look jah-mazing!
64
00:02:09,833 --> 00:02:12,967
Oh, you know,
one SoulCycle a month ago,
65
00:02:13,067 --> 00:02:15,167
and I swear
I'm still sweating.
66
00:02:15,233 --> 00:02:16,300
Otherwise known
as a hot flash.
67
00:02:16,367 --> 00:02:17,600
Ooh!
68
00:02:17,667 --> 00:02:19,967
(Bev)
Abbi, you're
so much prettier
69
00:02:20,067 --> 00:02:22,367
than that pic of yours
on Facebook.
70
00:02:22,433 --> 00:02:23,600
(Bobbi)
Right, I told her that.
71
00:02:23,667 --> 00:02:25,067
Let me see this manicure.
72
00:02:25,067 --> 00:02:26,400
What is that,
"Trophy Wife"?
73
00:02:26,467 --> 00:02:28,133
Second wife.
(sniffing)
74
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:30,167
I knew it!
She smells of mothballs.
75
00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:32,667
Oh, here we go.
You started cleaning out
the stuff before me!
76
00:02:32,733 --> 00:02:35,400
No....
You have a lot of nerve
starting before me.
77
00:02:35,467 --> 00:02:37,433
I waited an entire year
to come down here
78
00:02:37,500 --> 00:02:39,500
because you couldn't
leave the city 'cause
79
00:02:39,567 --> 00:02:41,467
you might be getting
"Hamilton" tickets?
80
00:02:41,533 --> 00:02:43,067
Sheryl's niece is
dating an usher
81
00:02:43,133 --> 00:02:45,467
who could slip us
through the garbage chute,
82
00:02:45,533 --> 00:02:47,300
but we had to be
ready at any moment.
83
00:02:47,367 --> 00:02:48,633
At any moment!
84
00:02:48,700 --> 00:02:50,800
(Bobbi)
Don't raise your voice
to me, missy!
85
00:02:50,867 --> 00:02:53,300
I'm the person who taught you
how to insert a diaphragm!
86
00:02:53,367 --> 00:02:55,700
So let's just show
a little respect!
87
00:02:59,533 --> 00:03:01,100
We're gonna go
to the pool.
88
00:03:01,167 --> 00:03:03,367
(Eliot)
Wait, my bathing suit is
in my suitcase.
89
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:04,967
What am I gonna wear?
90
00:03:05,067 --> 00:03:08,233
I can't believe I have been
on hold for two hours.
91
00:03:08,300 --> 00:03:10,333
Mmm.
Jesus Christ.
92
00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:12,800
Also, this bathing suit
is so tight.
93
00:03:12,867 --> 00:03:14,567
I can't believe
Grandpa used to wear this.
94
00:03:14,633 --> 00:03:16,600
Grandpa?
That's Grandma Esther's suit.
95
00:03:16,667 --> 00:03:18,633
What?
I knew it would fit you,
same hips.
96
00:03:18,700 --> 00:03:20,300
Oh, my God,
this is humiliating.
97
00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:21,700
Oh, own it, boi.
98
00:03:21,767 --> 00:03:23,733
Enjoy your beautiful body
in a tropical climate.
99
00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:26,100
So much better than
disgusting N-Y-C.
100
00:03:26,167 --> 00:03:31,533
So... the key to sunbathing
is to have a solid tan plan.
101
00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:34,567
First I do my back,
then I do my front.
102
00:03:34,633 --> 00:03:35,933
I didn't say it was,
like, a complicated plan.
103
00:03:36,067 --> 00:03:38,933
Okay, so can you help me
put on this 100 SPF?
104
00:03:39,067 --> 00:03:41,400
A dermatologist once told me
that I need to wear 100 SPF
105
00:03:41,467 --> 00:03:43,500
because I'm
"devastatingly white."
106
00:03:43,567 --> 00:03:45,700
What is it,
my fucking birthday?
Turn around.
107
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:47,867
El, come on, you need
this too, brother--
108
00:03:47,933 --> 00:03:49,133
Too hot!
109
00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:50,867
Respect.
110
00:03:50,933 --> 00:03:54,100
Excuse me, are you
the new on-site mortician?
111
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:57,900
I just loved Doris' eyebrows
at her service yesterday.
112
00:03:57,967 --> 00:04:00,333
No, I'm the late
Esther Baumgarten's
granddaughter, Ilana.
113
00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:03,733
Oh, you're the one dating
the gangster dentist.
114
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:08,567
Uh... no, we, uh...
We broke up, actually.
115
00:04:09,433 --> 00:04:10,967
Good for you.
116
00:04:12,933 --> 00:04:14,233
Oh, dude.
117
00:04:14,300 --> 00:04:16,300
(laughs)
The gun holder.
118
00:04:16,367 --> 00:04:17,600
Amazing.
119
00:04:17,667 --> 00:04:18,800
(Bev)
Pearls.
(Bobbi)
Crap.
120
00:04:18,867 --> 00:04:20,967
Ersatz ruby from
Little Richard.
121
00:04:21,067 --> 00:04:23,100
Let's just cut the crap,
Princess Ticklefeather.
122
00:04:23,167 --> 00:04:24,767
Let's talk about the ring.
123
00:04:24,833 --> 00:04:26,100
You really wanna
get into that?
124
00:04:26,167 --> 00:04:27,400
You bet your ass I do.
125
00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:28,767
All right, all right.
126
00:04:30,100 --> 00:04:32,067
All right, Mommy would
want me to have it.
127
00:04:32,067 --> 00:04:35,067
Ha!
It's probably the only
engagement ring
128
00:04:35,100 --> 00:04:36,967
I'm ever gonna have
at this point.
129
00:04:37,067 --> 00:04:39,667
You are so full of shit,
I need a plunger.
130
00:04:39,733 --> 00:04:42,767
Mommy would've wanted
that ring to go to Ilana,
131
00:04:42,833 --> 00:04:45,133
her only granddaughter,
or Eliot even!
132
00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:48,800
So, now I'm being punished
because I don't have children?
133
00:04:48,867 --> 00:04:51,600
Drama queen.
You know, I still may.
134
00:04:56,467 --> 00:04:58,700
Man, this place is
so magical.
135
00:04:58,767 --> 00:04:59,767
It's got everything.
136
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:02,067
Sunshine, warmth, greenery.
137
00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:04,333
Oh, my God,
is that an orange tree?
138
00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:06,433
So legit,
from "Mutta" Earth, baby.
139
00:05:06,500 --> 00:05:10,200
Real fruit that hasn't already
been licked by a bodega cat?
140
00:05:10,267 --> 00:05:11,500
Oh, God.
141
00:05:11,567 --> 00:05:12,967
Nuts.
142
00:05:13,067 --> 00:05:14,233
Nuts!
143
00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:16,533
Man, I feel so good
right now.
144
00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:18,233
I just feel at peace here.
145
00:05:18,300 --> 00:05:19,467
Of course
you feel at peace.
146
00:05:19,533 --> 00:05:20,900
You don't have the city
grinding you down,
147
00:05:20,967 --> 00:05:23,067
twisting your titties till
you're beggin' for mercy!
148
00:05:23,067 --> 00:05:25,233
Yeah, I don't feel
anxiety at every turn.
149
00:05:25,300 --> 00:05:27,533
There's not, like, danger
lurking at every corner.
150
00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:28,800
Good afternoon.
151
00:05:28,867 --> 00:05:30,100
Hey...
Hello.
152
00:05:30,167 --> 00:05:31,300
Holy shit.
153
00:05:31,367 --> 00:05:33,700
Okay, the gun thing
is actually terrifying.
154
00:05:33,767 --> 00:05:36,100
But other than that, dude,
I'm like... free!
Other than that.
155
00:05:36,167 --> 00:05:37,367
Other than that.
156
00:05:37,433 --> 00:05:39,133
It's, like, why do we choose
to live in New York?
157
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:41,800
Why do we want things
to be so fucking hard?
158
00:05:41,867 --> 00:05:43,567
It's like our lives are
Richard Pryor's dick,
159
00:05:43,633 --> 00:05:45,067
and New York is
the cocaine.
160
00:05:45,100 --> 00:05:46,633
Yeah.
161
00:05:46,700 --> 00:05:48,433
Wait, what?
162
00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:50,300
Richard Pryor, dude.
163
00:05:50,367 --> 00:05:53,233
Pam Grier found an actual
buildup of cocaine on her cervix
164
00:05:53,300 --> 00:05:56,533
'cause Richard used to,
like, dip his dick in coke
before they had sex
165
00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:57,700
so that it would take him
longer to come.
166
00:05:57,767 --> 00:05:59,767
But, it's, like,
just come, man.
167
00:05:59,833 --> 00:06:01,600
Coming feels amazing.
168
00:06:01,667 --> 00:06:03,167
And that's what
New York City is.
169
00:06:03,233 --> 00:06:05,233
One giant delayed orgasm.
170
00:06:05,300 --> 00:06:07,433
Instead of enjoying it now,
we're just suffering through it
171
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:11,233
so in 40 years, we can say,
"We did that! We lived there!"
172
00:06:11,300 --> 00:06:13,600
But until then, we're just
getting constantly fucked
173
00:06:13,667 --> 00:06:16,400
by Richard Pryor's
numb cocaine dick.
174
00:06:16,467 --> 00:06:17,633
(sighs)
175
00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:19,967
Oh, an open house.
We should go tomorrow.
176
00:06:20,067 --> 00:06:21,300
I bet they'll have
free cookies.
177
00:06:21,367 --> 00:06:22,900
Yeah, I bet they'll
have a free toilet!
178
00:06:22,967 --> 00:06:24,500
What?
I have to pee.
179
00:06:24,567 --> 00:06:25,933
Oh, let's go.
180
00:06:26,067 --> 00:06:32,867
* Angels live
in skies of blue *
181
00:06:34,467 --> 00:06:35,600
Ohh...
182
00:06:37,133 --> 00:06:38,067
(door closes)
183
00:06:38,067 --> 00:06:39,533
This is huge.
Yeah, wow.
184
00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:40,800
Hello.
185
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:42,433
Hi.
Hello, sir.
186
00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:43,767
Oh, my gosh,
Ilana, look.
187
00:06:43,833 --> 00:06:46,133
The kitchen is its own room
and the windows...
188
00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:47,533
It's a home.
189
00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:48,967
Oh, a home,
we don't have those.
190
00:06:49,067 --> 00:06:50,533
We have New York City
apartments.
191
00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:52,067
Well, this place
has it all.
192
00:06:52,067 --> 00:06:55,533
A lanai,
prune juice on tap.
193
00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:58,267
Life Alert buttons
in every corner.
194
00:06:58,333 --> 00:06:59,833
So, um...
195
00:06:59,900 --> 00:07:03,167
I don't know, how much is
this place, uh, going for?
196
00:07:03,233 --> 00:07:04,600
$425.
197
00:07:04,667 --> 00:07:06,167
425 a night, yeah,
times 30 nights,
198
00:07:06,233 --> 00:07:10,133
that's $12,000 a month.
No, $425 a month.
199
00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:12,367
Ugh.
200
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:15,867
We'll take it.
We'll take it.
201
00:07:17,533 --> 00:07:18,967
I could see us living here--
Dying here.
202
00:07:19,067 --> 00:07:19,967
I think that we could
put, like, the sofa--
203
00:07:20,067 --> 00:07:21,167
They have a lot of--
204
00:07:21,233 --> 00:07:23,567
I mean, normally,
you have to be
205
00:07:23,633 --> 00:07:26,400
over 55 years of age
to rent in this c0mmunity.
206
00:07:26,467 --> 00:07:27,733
Ohh...
207
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:30,900
But you are
a Darlington Lakes legacy.
208
00:07:30,967 --> 00:07:32,267
Yeah, I mean...
209
00:07:32,333 --> 00:07:34,333
we could sign a year-long
lease right now.
210
00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:38,433
Listen, there's already another
couple who's interested.
211
00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,933
And they are the right age.
212
00:07:43,067 --> 00:07:46,300
But... why don't you
go ahead and apply?
213
00:07:46,367 --> 00:07:50,167
There's a board meeting on
Thursday night where the, uh,
214
00:07:50,233 --> 00:07:53,167
community will vote on who
the next tenants should be.
215
00:07:53,233 --> 00:07:55,633
You'll have to convince them
that you're the right fit.
216
00:07:55,700 --> 00:07:56,667
Thank you, sir.
217
00:07:56,733 --> 00:07:58,067
You're welcome.
218
00:07:58,100 --> 00:08:01,267
Okay, are we doing this?
Are we moving to Florida?
219
00:08:01,333 --> 00:08:02,833
I think so.
220
00:08:02,900 --> 00:08:05,267
I mean, we "live" in New York,
but do we really live there?
221
00:08:05,333 --> 00:08:07,833
Yeah, I don't wanna
rise and grind anymore.
222
00:08:07,900 --> 00:08:11,500
I wanna rise and then,
like, lay right back down.
223
00:08:11,567 --> 00:08:13,467
Ab, we're doing this.
224
00:08:13,533 --> 00:08:15,100
We're moving to Florida.
(both laughing)
225
00:08:16,467 --> 00:08:17,600
Oh, my gosh, okay.
226
00:08:17,667 --> 00:08:19,067
If we're gonna impress
all these old people,
227
00:08:19,067 --> 00:08:20,833
we got a lot
of work to do.
228
00:08:20,900 --> 00:08:23,400
Oof, it is net-twerking
time, gaga.
229
00:08:24,700 --> 00:08:26,533
Great serve, Edna!
230
00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:27,667
Great return, Ethel.
231
00:08:27,733 --> 00:08:30,400
That was out!
I win, bitch!
232
00:08:30,467 --> 00:08:31,967
Oh, shove it, Edna.
233
00:08:32,067 --> 00:08:33,900
That was on the line,
and you know it.
234
00:08:33,967 --> 00:08:36,500
Girls, you saw it.
You make the call.
235
00:08:36,567 --> 00:08:39,300
I can't tell who has more
power in the community.
236
00:08:39,367 --> 00:08:41,300
Um...
237
00:08:41,367 --> 00:08:42,967
Well, Edna looks
like she's wearing
238
00:08:43,067 --> 00:08:44,767
a really expensive skirt.
239
00:08:44,833 --> 00:08:46,633
Could mean that
she's, like, elite.
240
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:47,800
Right.
241
00:08:47,867 --> 00:08:49,233
But Ethel's
so fucking bossy.
242
00:08:49,300 --> 00:08:51,067
I feel like she'd force
people to vote for us.
243
00:08:51,133 --> 00:08:52,567
She's like a cyberbully IRL.
244
00:08:52,633 --> 00:08:54,967
So, like a bully.
245
00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:56,933
Huh.
I forgot about bullies.
246
00:08:57,067 --> 00:08:58,267
You know what?
247
00:08:58,333 --> 00:09:01,467
I don't think we can choose.
We need both votes.
248
00:09:01,533 --> 00:09:03,567
You won,
but you should let her win.
249
00:09:03,633 --> 00:09:04,700
She needs it more.
250
00:09:04,767 --> 00:09:06,333
She needs it more.
251
00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:08,233
You're the pretty one.
It's the right thing to do.
252
00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:09,333
(sighs)
253
00:09:09,400 --> 00:09:11,100
You're the one
with the incredible body
254
00:09:11,167 --> 00:09:12,700
and that slammin' tuchus.
255
00:09:12,767 --> 00:09:13,900
It's the right thing
to do.
256
00:09:13,967 --> 00:09:15,567
Maybe you're right.
We've been friends
257
00:09:15,633 --> 00:09:17,533
since we're 16 years old.
258
00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:18,833
And I always get everything.
259
00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:20,233
Just between you and me,
260
00:09:20,300 --> 00:09:22,800
I got to fuck JFK,
and she didn't.
261
00:09:22,867 --> 00:09:24,067
Wow...
262
00:09:25,433 --> 00:09:27,100
Wow.
263
00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:28,933
I do owe her one.
264
00:09:29,067 --> 00:09:31,833
She fucked JFK
so I wouldn't have to.
265
00:09:31,900 --> 00:09:33,833
Ooh, such a predator.
266
00:09:33,900 --> 00:09:35,167
I'm so sorry.
267
00:09:35,233 --> 00:09:37,267
Women have been
treated horrible
268
00:09:37,333 --> 00:09:40,133
up until this time
and including this time.
269
00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:41,600
Tell me about it.
270
00:09:41,667 --> 00:09:43,067
So, could we call it a tie?
271
00:09:43,867 --> 00:09:45,833
Sure.
Who cares?
272
00:09:45,900 --> 00:09:48,967
**
273
00:09:52,733 --> 00:09:55,067
(scatting)
274
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:05,467
(applause)
275
00:10:07,333 --> 00:10:08,300
(sighs)
276
00:10:10,867 --> 00:10:12,033
(sniffs)
277
00:10:13,933 --> 00:10:15,233
(man)
Thank you for calling
North American Airlines.
278
00:10:15,300 --> 00:10:16,233
How may I assist you?
279
00:10:16,300 --> 00:10:18,333
Hi, you guys lost my luggage.
280
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:20,100
Oh, so sorry,
this is misplaced baggage.
281
00:10:20,167 --> 00:10:22,133
I'm gonna have to transfer you
to the lost baggage department.
282
00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:23,733
Please hold.
What, no,
how are those different?
283
00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:26,100
Fuck!
284
00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:27,867
Yo, Fabio.
Jesus, Mom!
285
00:10:27,933 --> 00:10:29,133
Why don't you make
yourself useful
286
00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:31,567
and either help me pack
or thump me?
287
00:10:31,633 --> 00:10:32,700
I'm having a very bad day.
288
00:10:32,767 --> 00:10:34,033
Thump you?
289
00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:36,800
Dealing with your Aunt Bev
is destroying my neck.
290
00:10:36,867 --> 00:10:39,000
She's a pain in my ass.
(long sigh)
291
00:10:39,067 --> 00:10:41,567
Okay, I can't believe
I'm thumping my mother.
292
00:10:41,633 --> 00:10:43,900
Ah, delicious, ohh...
293
00:10:43,967 --> 00:10:45,267
Oh, come on,
deeper.
294
00:10:45,333 --> 00:10:46,667
Right there,
ah, right there.
295
00:10:46,733 --> 00:10:47,767
Ahh...
296
00:10:47,833 --> 00:10:49,033
Mom...
Oh!
297
00:10:49,100 --> 00:10:51,500
I can't, you're--
The noises, the noises.
298
00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:53,533
All right, fuck you.
299
00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:55,333
Fuck you!
300
00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:56,400
Sorry.
301
00:10:56,467 --> 00:10:58,600
Dude, we are frickin'
nailing this.
302
00:10:58,667 --> 00:11:00,600
Yeah, I feel like they're
really starting to like us.
303
00:11:00,667 --> 00:11:02,500
I mean, I already got
three marriage proposals.
304
00:11:02,567 --> 00:11:04,833
Ah!
Yeah, I can't wait
to live here.
305
00:11:04,900 --> 00:11:06,633
Me neither.
It is lit-ral-ly, like,
306
00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,367
blue skies are
smiling at me.
307
00:11:08,433 --> 00:11:10,567
Oh.
(plane engine overhead)
308
00:11:10,633 --> 00:11:12,133
Shit, ugh.
309
00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:14,167
I almost forgot
we're in Florida.
310
00:11:14,233 --> 00:11:15,333
I mean, if we move here,
311
00:11:15,400 --> 00:11:17,233
we'll be in, like,
Donald (bleep) land.
312
00:11:17,300 --> 00:11:19,233
Maybe this is
a bad decision.
313
00:11:20,333 --> 00:11:22,067
What?
Jaime just texted me.
314
00:11:22,067 --> 00:11:23,800
It is four degrees
in New York City.
315
00:11:23,867 --> 00:11:28,567
And our pipes in our apartment
just froze and burst... again.
316
00:11:30,733 --> 00:11:32,067
This is a good decision,
it's great.
I think it's a good decision.
317
00:11:32,067 --> 00:11:33,100
I love it,
I think it's right.
318
00:11:33,167 --> 00:11:34,367
You know, Florida
might be filled
319
00:11:34,433 --> 00:11:35,967
with (bleep) supporters,
but if we move here,
320
00:11:36,067 --> 00:11:38,833
our votes could
swing the state.
321
00:11:38,900 --> 00:11:40,400
Oh, okay,
now we can't not.
322
00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,067
Let's go borrow
Grandma Esther's dope Cadillac.
323
00:11:42,100 --> 00:11:43,533
Head up to "Pube-icks,"
AKA Publix,
324
00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:45,300
and get some goddamn
whitefish salad
325
00:11:45,367 --> 00:11:47,333
for these
old dirty bastards.
326
00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:50,900
(car starts)
**
327
00:11:50,967 --> 00:11:53,467
* Jessemey's got a feelin'
like she want to *
328
00:11:53,533 --> 00:11:56,433
* Standin' in front of me
like shorty what you gon' do? *
329
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:59,333
* Said, Sailor baby, let me see
you do some... *
330
00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:01,733
* You might say... *
331
00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:04,700
* She work
that booty like a boss *
332
00:12:04,767 --> 00:12:07,700
* She work that booty
like a boss, boss *
333
00:12:07,767 --> 00:12:10,700
* She work that
booty like a boss *
334
00:12:10,767 --> 00:12:15,167
* She work that booty
like a boss, boss... *
335
00:12:15,233 --> 00:12:17,433
* Down, down, get it back *
336
00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:20,533
* Get it back,
get it nice *
337
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:25,500
* Get it...
Get it... *
338
00:12:25,567 --> 00:12:26,867
* Oh *
339
00:12:26,933 --> 00:12:28,667
**
340
00:12:28,733 --> 00:12:31,100
* She work that booty
like a boss *
341
00:12:31,167 --> 00:12:32,700
* Boss, boss, boss, boss *
342
00:12:32,767 --> 00:12:34,700
* Like a boss... *
343
00:12:34,767 --> 00:12:37,867
* She work that booty
like a boss *
344
00:12:37,933 --> 00:12:42,167
* She work that booty like a
boss, boss, boss, boss, boss **
345
00:12:42,233 --> 00:12:43,600
Gorgeous people!
346
00:12:43,667 --> 00:12:46,433
Oh, my gosh,
I've got hors d'oeuvre.
347
00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:48,433
Hope you take as
much as you like.
348
00:12:48,500 --> 00:12:50,433
Just remember
to vote for us.
349
00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:54,067
These give me terrible gas.
350
00:12:58,067 --> 00:13:00,567
Bitches are horny
for butterscotch.
351
00:13:05,667 --> 00:13:10,300
The Darlington Lakes
Executive Board
352
00:13:10,367 --> 00:13:14,267
will now confer
to make a decision
353
00:13:14,333 --> 00:13:16,633
regarding the new tenants.
354
00:13:19,133 --> 00:13:21,200
I wonder how long
they'll take.
355
00:13:21,267 --> 00:13:23,467
We've reached a decision.
356
00:13:23,533 --> 00:13:25,200
That was really fast.
Okay.
357
00:13:28,767 --> 00:13:30,133
Congratulations, ladies!
358
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:31,467
Oh!
Oh, my God.
359
00:13:31,533 --> 00:13:35,533
You're the new residents
at Darlington Lakes.
360
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:37,633
(applause)
361
00:13:39,267 --> 00:13:41,600
Thank you guys so much,
you're so cute.
362
00:13:41,667 --> 00:13:42,833
We are family now!
363
00:13:42,900 --> 00:13:44,533
Yeah, you won't be sorry,
we promise.
364
00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:48,200
Well, we'd rather have
two young Jewish dykes
365
00:13:48,267 --> 00:13:50,600
than a couple of (bleep).
366
00:13:50,667 --> 00:13:53,400
(applause)
367
00:14:00,700 --> 00:14:01,833
(Ilana)
We gotta get
the hell outta here!
368
00:14:01,900 --> 00:14:03,300
I don't even know
what to do with this!
369
00:14:03,367 --> 00:14:05,067
I can't believe guns
come with the apartment!
370
00:14:05,133 --> 00:14:06,833
(loud grunt)
371
00:14:06,900 --> 00:14:08,067
A bunch of monsters!
372
00:14:11,367 --> 00:14:12,800
(Bobbi)
All right, you let me
have the ring.
373
00:14:12,867 --> 00:14:14,833
And I'm gonna give you
374
00:14:14,900 --> 00:14:18,100
the end tables
and the sleeper sofa.
375
00:14:18,167 --> 00:14:22,833
Oh, please, people pay not to
sleep on that pile-a-bullshit.
376
00:14:22,900 --> 00:14:25,733
Here's what I'm gonna
do for you.
377
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:29,900
You can have the fake Van Gogh
and all of the china.
378
00:14:29,967 --> 00:14:31,833
(laughing)
China?!
379
00:14:31,900 --> 00:14:33,467
That shit is Ikea.
380
00:14:33,533 --> 00:14:35,200
Do I look like
a frickin' idiot?
381
00:14:35,267 --> 00:14:37,733
I taught you everything
you know, girlie.
382
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,300
You're not puttin'
one over on me.
383
00:14:39,367 --> 00:14:42,400
If you're gonna behave
like this...
384
00:14:46,667 --> 00:14:50,433
...then maybe you shouldn't
come to Sandals this year.
385
00:14:51,467 --> 00:14:53,900
You did not.
386
00:14:53,967 --> 00:14:55,533
Yeah, I did.
387
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:59,900
How dare you take
my Sandals vacay hostage.
388
00:15:00,067 --> 00:15:01,133
How dare you!
389
00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,067
Un-frickin'-believable.
390
00:15:03,100 --> 00:15:04,933
Now you're Miss Sensitive.
391
00:15:05,067 --> 00:15:07,133
You bet your ass I am!
392
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:12,600
(man)
We've located your bag.
We're dispatching it to you.
393
00:15:12,667 --> 00:15:15,067
Yeah, whatever.
394
00:15:15,133 --> 00:15:16,100
(phone thuds)
395
00:15:18,933 --> 00:15:19,967
Hey.
396
00:15:20,067 --> 00:15:22,133
(Abbi)
I'm sorry, I'm sorry...
397
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:25,667
Even the type of fish salad
they like is white.
398
00:15:25,733 --> 00:15:27,800
I'm now realizing that,
that the only non-white people
399
00:15:27,867 --> 00:15:30,300
I've seen in the last few days
have been, like, nurses
400
00:15:30,367 --> 00:15:33,333
and gardeners
and, like, the various
dudes driving ambulances
401
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,600
that have come in and out
of the fucking community.
402
00:15:35,667 --> 00:15:36,933
Dude, shaming
other white people
403
00:15:37,067 --> 00:15:38,867
for their racism
is, like, my thing.
404
00:15:38,933 --> 00:15:40,067
I've been in a haze!
405
00:15:40,133 --> 00:15:41,533
New York may be rough,
but at least it's not
406
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:43,800
a white supremacist's
wet dream.
407
00:15:45,067 --> 00:15:48,067
Get me back to New York
where everybody hates
408
00:15:48,133 --> 00:15:49,967
Donald (bleep)
and Mike Pence.
409
00:15:51,567 --> 00:15:52,900
This place is so scary.
410
00:15:52,967 --> 00:15:54,333
It's, like, there
are no gay people.
411
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:57,667
Ugh!
There are zero
interracial couples.
412
00:15:57,733 --> 00:15:59,900
Literally only, like,
straight white people.
413
00:16:00,067 --> 00:16:01,800
(mimicking gunshot)
What are we? In a goddamn
Woody Allen movie?
414
00:16:01,867 --> 00:16:02,833
Ugh!
415
00:16:04,900 --> 00:16:06,467
Excuse me.
416
00:16:09,133 --> 00:16:10,233
(sniffing)
417
00:16:10,300 --> 00:16:11,567
All right, come on.
418
00:16:12,967 --> 00:16:14,467
Thank you.
419
00:16:20,467 --> 00:16:21,700
So, when we were kids,
420
00:16:21,767 --> 00:16:23,200
Grandma Esther
and Grandpa Zayde
421
00:16:23,267 --> 00:16:25,533
used to take us
to the Catskills every summer.
422
00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:26,900
And the men would stay home
during the week.
423
00:16:26,967 --> 00:16:28,767
They'd come up
on the weekends to join us.
424
00:16:28,833 --> 00:16:31,100
So, one summer,
Bev and I stole
425
00:16:31,167 --> 00:16:34,067
Grandma Esther's diet pills--
speed, you know, we took it.
426
00:16:34,067 --> 00:16:35,667
And we're trying
to hide it from Grandma.
427
00:16:35,733 --> 00:16:37,133
But she spotted us
immediately
428
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,400
'cause she was high
on speed herself,
429
00:16:39,467 --> 00:16:40,667
so then...
(laughing)
430
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,100
Remember this, Beverly?
431
00:16:42,167 --> 00:16:43,500
So then...
(laughing)
432
00:16:43,567 --> 00:16:45,100
we just ended up
in the middle of the night,
433
00:16:45,167 --> 00:16:47,567
you know, in that tiny,
little bungalow kitchen
434
00:16:47,633 --> 00:16:50,067
till 3:00 in the morning
grinding our teeth.
435
00:16:50,067 --> 00:16:51,267
And we never told Daddy.
436
00:16:51,333 --> 00:16:54,367
No, we never told Daddy.
437
00:16:54,433 --> 00:16:57,967
You know, I lost my virginity
in that little bungalow.
438
00:16:58,067 --> 00:16:59,067
No, you didn't.
439
00:16:59,133 --> 00:17:00,700
You lost your virginity
to Jerry Katz
440
00:17:00,767 --> 00:17:02,300
the year after
I went to college.
441
00:17:02,367 --> 00:17:04,167
Unh-unh, I lied.
442
00:17:04,233 --> 00:17:08,067
I lost my virginity
to Neil Friedman
443
00:17:08,133 --> 00:17:09,733
in that bungalow
444
00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:13,233
while all of you were sleeping
the summer I was 15.
445
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:15,067
Wait a minute, Neil Friedman?
446
00:17:15,133 --> 00:17:17,933
Wasn't he the one
with the scoliosis brace?
447
00:17:18,067 --> 00:17:19,267
Uh-huh.
448
00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:22,100
I was so petrified
449
00:17:22,167 --> 00:17:24,100
that I was gonna wake
all of youse up
450
00:17:24,167 --> 00:17:27,567
because it kept bangin'
against the headboard.
451
00:17:27,633 --> 00:17:30,867
(loud laughter)
452
00:17:34,067 --> 00:17:35,100
Bangin'?
453
00:17:35,167 --> 00:17:38,133
Oh, Beverly,
you know what?
(laughing)
454
00:17:38,200 --> 00:17:40,300
You take the ring.
455
00:17:40,367 --> 00:17:43,433
No, Bobbi, you take it.
456
00:17:43,500 --> 00:17:45,267
No, you take it, Bev.
Who could care?
457
00:17:45,333 --> 00:17:48,533
It's just a material possession.
It doesn't mean anything.
458
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:50,633
Oh, my God, Mom,
you need to smoke more often,
459
00:17:50,700 --> 00:17:52,600
like, every damn day.
460
00:17:57,633 --> 00:18:00,567
I do need to change
my Facebook profile pic.
461
00:18:00,633 --> 00:18:02,700
I see that now, you know?
It's just hard.
462
00:18:02,767 --> 00:18:04,267
Sometimes I wanna be
one of those people
463
00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:06,500
that just, like, deletes
Facebook altogether.
Yeah.
464
00:18:06,567 --> 00:18:10,200
And than I can always tell
everyone I deleted Facebook.
465
00:18:10,267 --> 00:18:13,167
But then I'd miss
all the baby pics.
466
00:18:13,233 --> 00:18:14,533
(sighs)
467
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,833
Babies.
Mmm...
468
00:18:16,900 --> 00:18:18,067
You know what,
speaking of Facebook,
469
00:18:18,100 --> 00:18:19,900
and I wasn't gonna
say anything.
470
00:18:19,967 --> 00:18:21,500
But, you know,
now I'm stoned.
471
00:18:21,567 --> 00:18:23,600
I'm gonna spill the beans.
472
00:18:23,667 --> 00:18:26,667
I saw earlier on Facebook
that, uh, Lincoln
473
00:18:26,733 --> 00:18:29,600
changed his status to single.
474
00:18:34,500 --> 00:18:37,467
Cool. Cool.
475
00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:38,867
Hey...
476
00:18:38,933 --> 00:18:40,767
Ilana, where did you
get this pot anyway?
477
00:18:40,833 --> 00:18:42,467
I brought it.
On the plane? How?
478
00:18:42,533 --> 00:18:44,100
In my pussy.
(coughing)
479
00:18:44,167 --> 00:18:45,467
(sighs)
Ew.
480
00:18:45,533 --> 00:18:47,133
I knew, it's a thing.
481
00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:49,167
Oh, big freakin' deal.
482
00:18:49,233 --> 00:18:50,600
She came out of you.
483
00:18:50,667 --> 00:18:52,700
You can't smoke a little
weed that came out of her?
484
00:18:55,133 --> 00:18:58,567
* You'll all roll
all over me *
485
00:19:03,833 --> 00:19:06,333
Good-bye, you old
Boca box of junk!
486
00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:08,700
You gave us some fun times
487
00:19:08,767 --> 00:19:11,067
and E.coli from
the pool that one year.
488
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:12,133
(sighs)
489
00:19:12,200 --> 00:19:14,267
Girls, see you
back in New York.
490
00:19:14,333 --> 00:19:15,533
Use condoms!
491
00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,100
Let's go, El.
492
00:19:17,167 --> 00:19:18,333
Thanks for the full
new wardrobe.
493
00:19:22,067 --> 00:19:24,533
I know material possessions
mean nothing, but...
494
00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:26,200
this car means a lot to me.
495
00:19:26,267 --> 00:19:28,500
Yeah, it's like we're taking
a piece of Florida home with us.
496
00:19:28,567 --> 00:19:31,633
A good one,
not a racist one.
497
00:19:31,700 --> 00:19:33,633
* ...temp be risin'... *
498
00:19:33,700 --> 00:19:35,800
(both)
Whoo!
499
00:19:35,867 --> 00:19:37,300
* ...from the start *
500
00:19:37,367 --> 00:19:40,067
* Let me hear...
with attacks to your heart *
501
00:19:40,067 --> 00:19:42,167
* Get you back, heart attack *
502
00:19:42,233 --> 00:19:44,733
* Don't you think
that it's fun *
503
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:47,067
* One more time
blow your mind *
504
00:19:47,067 --> 00:19:48,933
* All the way to the sun **
505
00:19:51,067 --> 00:19:52,833
(Ilana)
Ah, I wish you could
come with me.
506
00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:53,867
(Abbi)
I don't think I should.
507
00:19:53,933 --> 00:19:55,067
Yeah, probably not.
508
00:19:58,233 --> 00:20:00,533
(sighs)
You let me know if you
need anything, okay?
509
00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:02,167
Thanks, love you.
510
00:20:02,233 --> 00:20:03,400
Good luck, dude.
511
00:20:05,467 --> 00:20:06,833
Okay, here we go.
512
00:20:07,933 --> 00:20:09,067
(camera shutter clicks)
513
00:20:09,133 --> 00:20:12,400
Goddamn it!
(loud sigh)
514
00:20:12,467 --> 00:20:16,233
Olivia won't wait around
for you forever, Fitz.
515
00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:17,767
Who am I kidding?
516
00:20:17,833 --> 00:20:19,467
(text alert)
Of course she will.
517
00:20:21,233 --> 00:20:22,300
Hmm?
518
00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:33,033
What?
519
00:20:40,967 --> 00:20:42,033
(chuckling)
520
00:20:42,100 --> 00:20:44,933
* Lady and the tramp... *
521
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:46,433
* Girl is a tramp *
522
00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:47,500
* You walk in... *
523
00:20:47,567 --> 00:20:48,733
(grunting)
524
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:52,233
**
525
00:20:54,067 --> 00:20:55,167
Hey.
526
00:20:55,233 --> 00:20:57,033
Hi.
527
00:20:57,100 --> 00:20:58,367
You wanna come inside?
528
00:21:00,067 --> 00:21:01,133
All right.
529
00:21:03,367 --> 00:21:04,833
I'm never gonna ask
about the mechanics
530
00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:06,133
of what just happened.
531
00:21:12,867 --> 00:21:15,300
**
532
00:21:18,933 --> 00:21:20,167
(exhales)
37747
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