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WWW.MY-SUBS.COM
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Uh, Sid, can you pass the salt?
2
00:00:07,338 --> 00:00:09,732
Sure, Charlie. I assume you're
asking that because I have
3
00:00:09,757 --> 00:00:12,460
all the time in the world,
since my boyfriend dumped me.
4
00:00:12,976 --> 00:00:14,296
Well, while we're passing things,
5
00:00:14,467 --> 00:00:16,226
I might want to pass on some advice:
6
00:00:16,329 --> 00:00:18,406
wash your hat once!
7
00:00:20,789 --> 00:00:24,539
All right, I know things have been
tough since you broke up with John,
8
00:00:24,564 --> 00:00:27,663
but if you don't stop talking like
that, I'm gonna kick your little ass.
9
00:00:28,509 --> 00:00:30,765
Why does everyone hate me?
10
00:00:31,108 --> 00:00:33,093
I'm so unlovable.
11
00:00:34,776 --> 00:00:36,999
Yikes. I don't need salt, okay?
12
00:00:38,178 --> 00:00:39,522
Unbelievable.
13
00:00:40,055 --> 00:00:42,694
I just got a invitation
to my son Tony's wedding.
14
00:00:42,882 --> 00:00:44,045
Check this out.
15
00:00:44,569 --> 00:00:46,765
"Hosted by Lorraine and Reggie."
16
00:00:46,790 --> 00:00:49,179
My ex-wife and her husband
are running the show.
17
00:00:49,283 --> 00:00:50,391
No mention of me at all.
18
00:00:50,562 --> 00:00:51,762
- I have been replaced.
- Whoa.
19
00:00:51,855 --> 00:00:54,323
I don't think Tony is
trying to replace you.
20
00:00:54,386 --> 00:00:56,269
I mean, you guys
are really close, right?
21
00:00:56,298 --> 00:00:58,050
Well, yeah. I mean, that's my son.
22
00:00:58,251 --> 00:00:59,488
Fruit of my loins.
23
00:00:59,781 --> 00:01:02,273
We don't chitty-chat all that much,
'cause we're grown-ass men.
24
00:01:02,298 --> 00:01:03,389
But I told him, I said,
25
00:01:03,414 --> 00:01:07,390
"You let me know when and where
this wedding is and I will be there."
26
00:01:07,766 --> 00:01:10,499
Well, it sounds like he's doing
exactly what you told him to.
27
00:01:13,626 --> 00:01:15,038
It sounds like you're not listening.
28
00:01:15,062 --> 00:01:18,422
I'm being sidelined at
my own son's wedding.
29
00:01:19,062 --> 00:01:21,328
Well, it's time for old
Hank to assert himself.
30
00:01:21,353 --> 00:01:23,664
And I'm gonna start by
inviting y'all three.
31
00:01:23,762 --> 00:01:25,851
Oh, no. Count me out, Hank.
32
00:01:25,897 --> 00:01:28,609
I really don't need
any tense family drama.
33
00:01:29,156 --> 00:01:31,445
It's at some fancy Vegas hotel.
34
00:01:32,172 --> 00:01:34,179
Well, what is life
without a little drama?
35
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I'm in. I love Vegas.
36
00:01:35,570 --> 00:01:38,593
Yeah. Me, too. I got that town wired.
37
00:01:39,098 --> 00:01:41,672
I got connections at
the Sands, the Sahara.
38
00:01:41,892 --> 00:01:44,263
It sounds like you had that town wired.
39
00:01:44,444 --> 00:01:46,044
Those places have been torn down.
40
00:01:46,109 --> 00:01:48,630
No. Trust me, when they
hear that I'm coming back,
41
00:01:48,819 --> 00:01:50,212
I'm gonna rule that place.
42
00:01:50,374 --> 00:01:51,755
You know, back in the '70s,
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00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:53,919
they used to call me
Charlie Sell Phones.
44
00:01:54,043 --> 00:01:56,222
Stop lying, stank hat.
45
00:01:56,433 --> 00:01:59,409
They didn't even have
cell phones in the '70S.
46
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Uh-uh.
47
00:02:00,496 --> 00:02:02,002
"Sell" with an "S."
48
00:02:02,288 --> 00:02:05,252
I used to sell rotary
phones to key figures
49
00:02:05,277 --> 00:02:06,666
in the Vegas underworld.
50
00:02:06,844 --> 00:02:07,947
They were untappable.
51
00:02:09,315 --> 00:02:11,088
Well, y'all have fun.
52
00:02:11,619 --> 00:02:13,916
Vegas is no place for the brokenhearted.
53
00:02:14,323 --> 00:02:16,862
I should go someplace like Pittsburgh.
54
00:02:17,549 --> 00:02:20,346
Oh, come on. This is gonna be great.
55
00:02:20,447 --> 00:02:22,994
Vegas is the perfect place
for you to get over John.
56
00:02:23,083 --> 00:02:25,041
After my divorce, I went to Vegas.
57
00:02:25,066 --> 00:02:27,119
I got over ten years
of pain in one weekend.
58
00:02:27,196 --> 00:02:30,539
And so Vegas Margaret was born.
59
00:02:31,025 --> 00:02:34,057
One day, I tipped the
pool boy with my room key.
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00:02:34,082 --> 00:02:36,447
Oh, all right. All right,
all right, all right, I'll go.
61
00:02:36,472 --> 00:02:39,745
Anything to keep me from
hearing the end of your sex story.
62
00:02:39,770 --> 00:02:41,432
Oh, you're gonna hear it all right.
63
00:02:41,457 --> 00:02:44,292
So, the air is thick with
the smell of chlorine,
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00:02:44,572 --> 00:02:46,681
- and I am really horny...
- Aah!
65
00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:12,246
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.MY-SUBS.com
66
00:03:14,518 --> 00:03:15,964
What the hell happened to Vegas?
67
00:03:15,989 --> 00:03:17,730
It used to be the devil's playground.
68
00:03:17,755 --> 00:03:20,706
Now it looks like a unicorn
threw up all over the place.
69
00:03:21,288 --> 00:03:23,030
And most of it landed on your outfit.
70
00:03:23,504 --> 00:03:25,589
Hey, you ain't seen nothin' yet.
71
00:03:25,655 --> 00:03:27,893
This is Vegas Margaret understated.
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00:03:27,918 --> 00:03:31,018
I got an outfit in my
bag that needs batteries.
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00:03:32,026 --> 00:03:34,378
Okay, Sid, come on. Let's
go get you over John.
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00:03:34,725 --> 00:03:36,301
I'll tell you what would
help me get over John is
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00:03:36,325 --> 00:03:38,184
you not saying his
name every five minutes.
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00:03:39,429 --> 00:03:41,429
- All right, I'm gonna go check us in.
- All right.
77
00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:44,014
- Hey, Pop!
- Tony!
78
00:03:45,435 --> 00:03:48,106
Look at you. My son, getting married.
79
00:03:49,770 --> 00:03:51,590
- There's the man of the hour.
- Hey, Reggie.
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00:03:51,781 --> 00:03:53,555
Thanks so much for those
MMA tickets last night.
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00:03:53,579 --> 00:03:55,186
We were so close, we got blood on us.
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00:03:57,025 --> 00:03:59,241
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Re-Re-Reggie, Reggie, Reggie.
83
00:03:59,359 --> 00:04:01,515
Excuse me, me and, uh,
Tony weren't finished
84
00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:02,700
with our little greeting yet.
85
00:04:02,986 --> 00:04:05,421
Ha-ah! Here I go.
86
00:04:10,530 --> 00:04:12,671
We do... we do this all the time.
87
00:04:13,082 --> 00:04:14,126
I love you so much, son.
88
00:04:16,065 --> 00:04:18,241
I knew you were gonna make
a fool of yourself at this wedding,
89
00:04:18,265 --> 00:04:20,686
I just didn't know it was gonna
be in the first minute, Hank.
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00:04:22,869 --> 00:04:25,358
So you do know my name.
'Cause I couldn't find it
91
00:04:25,490 --> 00:04:27,429
- on that invitation.
- That's enough, you two.
92
00:04:28,007 --> 00:04:29,297
I don't need you guys
fighting all weekend.
93
00:04:29,321 --> 00:04:30,641
Let's just focus on the positive.
94
00:04:30,983 --> 00:04:34,116
We're all here together... you, me, Dad,
95
00:04:34,533 --> 00:04:36,467
Reggie, that guy.
96
00:04:37,498 --> 00:04:39,818
those two other white people
you brought who I barely know.
97
00:04:41,057 --> 00:04:43,030
All right, my room is comped.
98
00:04:43,555 --> 00:04:45,062
They must have heard I was back in town.
99
00:04:45,086 --> 00:04:47,365
This has got Ronnie Room
Comps written all over it.
100
00:04:47,739 --> 00:04:50,046
Actually, it was Reggie. He
picked up everybody's rooms.
101
00:04:50,384 --> 00:04:51,411
He's the best, isn't he?
102
00:04:51,703 --> 00:04:53,670
Uh, Reggie, me and my
friends... we not impressed
103
00:04:53,695 --> 00:04:55,178
with your little room comp.
104
00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:58,326
Reggie, you honor me with this comp.
105
00:05:00,403 --> 00:05:02,592
If you ever need a
rotary phone installed,
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00:05:02,857 --> 00:05:04,108
I'm your guy.
107
00:05:06,247 --> 00:05:07,412
Good to know. Thank you.
108
00:05:08,966 --> 00:05:11,834
Oh, yes. Reggie's paying for everything.
109
00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:15,123
And I mean everything.
110
00:05:16,539 --> 00:05:19,342
Bachelor party. Bachelorette
party. Rooms. Wi-Fi.
111
00:05:19,370 --> 00:05:21,893
And that's premium Wi-Fi, no buffering.
112
00:05:22,486 --> 00:05:24,768
Well, it's not every day
your son gets married.
113
00:05:24,793 --> 00:05:27,284
Uh, stepson. Don't
forget the, uh, "step."
114
00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:29,316
- You see what he's doing?
- Yeah.
115
00:05:29,340 --> 00:05:31,753
He trying to make me look
bad in front of my own son.
116
00:05:31,890 --> 00:05:34,363
All right, guys, we're out.
I hope we see both of you
117
00:05:34,388 --> 00:05:36,308
at the bachelor party
dinner tonight. It's on me.
118
00:05:36,401 --> 00:05:39,651
The hell it is. I'm buying
dinner for the family.
119
00:05:39,721 --> 00:05:41,455
- Wow, thanks, Dad.
- Hank's paying?
120
00:05:41,518 --> 00:05:43,260
Where y'all eating,
at a vending machine?
121
00:05:48,855 --> 00:05:50,682
So, check it out, Sid.
122
00:05:50,959 --> 00:05:53,900
This is my Vegas Margaret outfit.
123
00:05:54,732 --> 00:05:56,690
Well, honey, it's like the sun...
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00:05:56,715 --> 00:05:58,228
it's bright, shiny
125
00:05:58,863 --> 00:06:00,041
and hard to look at.
126
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:03,674
Enough. Time to change that attitude
127
00:06:03,699 --> 00:06:05,174
- and get you over...
- No, no!
128
00:06:05,199 --> 00:06:06,307
Don't you say it.
129
00:06:07,125 --> 00:06:09,345
You know who. All right.
130
00:06:09,553 --> 00:06:12,693
We're gonna go big, Sid.
We've each got $500 in chips.
131
00:06:12,718 --> 00:06:14,894
So if you follow my
lead, we can triple this.
132
00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:18,742
Waitress. Could we get a couple
of Moscow Mules for us high rollers?
133
00:06:19,029 --> 00:06:20,242
No more bets.
134
00:06:21,324 --> 00:06:22,882
Wait. Sid, what did you do?
135
00:06:23,798 --> 00:06:25,585
I went big, like you told me to.
136
00:06:25,967 --> 00:06:28,405
I put all your chips on
red, all my chips on black,
137
00:06:28,471 --> 00:06:29,859
so we cannot lose.
138
00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:31,765
Green! The rare double zero.
139
00:06:31,790 --> 00:06:34,937
What?! Wait, Sid. What the hell?
140
00:06:34,962 --> 00:06:37,093
That's all our money
for the whole weekend.
141
00:06:37,118 --> 00:06:38,867
Well, why didn't you
tell me about green?
142
00:06:38,972 --> 00:06:40,796
Nobody bets on green.
143
00:06:40,862 --> 00:06:43,757
Well, if he had, he
would've won $36,000.
144
00:06:45,321 --> 00:06:46,582
Butt out, dealer.
145
00:06:46,613 --> 00:06:47,637
The name's John.
146
00:06:47,693 --> 00:06:48,693
Damn it!
147
00:06:49,950 --> 00:06:51,648
Ooh, are you guys tapped out?
148
00:06:51,822 --> 00:06:53,671
Free drinks are for gamblers only.
149
00:06:54,010 --> 00:06:55,484
Whiskey soda for John?
150
00:06:55,603 --> 00:06:56,960
Oh, come on!
151
00:06:57,628 --> 00:07:00,257
Margaret, you told me this
trip was gonna cheer me up.
152
00:07:00,552 --> 00:07:02,989
I'm broke, I'm sober,
and we're hanging out
153
00:07:03,014 --> 00:07:05,930
in what apparently is
an all-John casino.
154
00:07:06,346 --> 00:07:10,044
How can I go big in Vegas
when I don't have any money?
155
00:07:10,716 --> 00:07:11,752
I've got a plan.
156
00:07:11,994 --> 00:07:13,753
What are you gonna do,
skin another peacock
157
00:07:13,778 --> 00:07:15,142
and throw it on your back?
158
00:07:20,833 --> 00:07:22,447
What the hell have I gotten into?
159
00:07:22,814 --> 00:07:24,697
Look at the prices on this menu, man.
160
00:07:25,009 --> 00:07:26,353
And I ain't seeing no combos.
161
00:07:26,378 --> 00:07:29,048
Oh, relax, Hank. You're
with Charlie Sell Phones.
162
00:07:29,229 --> 00:07:32,319
Yeah. We're here for the
Henderson bachelor party,
163
00:07:32,362 --> 00:07:33,929
and we expect to be taken care of.
164
00:07:34,377 --> 00:07:36,236
We know Robbie Restaurants.
165
00:07:37,056 --> 00:07:39,197
You know Robbie Restaurants?
166
00:07:39,705 --> 00:07:41,353
We know Robbie Restaurants.
167
00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:44,287
Are you saying in broken English
168
00:07:44,331 --> 00:07:46,205
that you're not gonna
rob the restaurant?
169
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:49,989
It's a person. Robbie Restaurants.
170
00:07:50,736 --> 00:07:52,856
I don't know what's happening,
but your table's ready.
171
00:07:54,541 --> 00:07:55,586
Okay, forget about it.
172
00:07:55,611 --> 00:07:57,797
We'll get tap waters,
share a side salad.
173
00:07:57,822 --> 00:07:59,622
- Good thing it's just the four of us.
- Yeah.
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00:07:59,824 --> 00:08:02,423
Hey, guys, over here. Dad,
these are my groomsmen.
175
00:08:02,448 --> 00:08:03,908
Oh, hey.
176
00:08:07,142 --> 00:08:08,470
Oh... Oh.
177
00:08:09,744 --> 00:08:12,030
- Hey, now. It's good to see...
- Their flight got delayed.
178
00:08:12,054 --> 00:08:13,454
They haven't eaten since breakfast.
179
00:08:14,076 --> 00:08:16,767
Well, how the hell did the
plane even lift off the ground?
180
00:08:29,267 --> 00:08:31,775
Did Vernon just order
another seafood tower?
181
00:08:33,752 --> 00:08:35,469
What happened to your
s-smaller friends?
182
00:08:35,642 --> 00:08:37,299
Les, Slim, String Bean and them?
183
00:08:37,645 --> 00:08:38,776
Vernon is String Bean.
184
00:08:39,166 --> 00:08:40,603
What the hell happened to him?
185
00:08:41,611 --> 00:08:44,451
He's actually lost a lot of weight
since that last trip we took to Cabo.
186
00:08:45,181 --> 00:08:46,806
Vernon, looking good.
187
00:08:48,864 --> 00:08:51,321
You been using your
maracas? I know I have.
188
00:08:54,236 --> 00:08:55,329
What the hell is this, man?
189
00:08:55,663 --> 00:08:57,578
Taking my son on trips,
getting him maracas.
190
00:08:58,133 --> 00:08:59,282
Bastard.
191
00:09:00,462 --> 00:09:03,251
Hey, Hank. Can you pass that
bottle of wine? I need to top off.
192
00:09:03,649 --> 00:09:05,541
Yeah, 'cause you're running
through it, you lush.
193
00:09:05,565 --> 00:09:07,480
This the good stuff.
You've got to savor it.
194
00:09:07,583 --> 00:09:08,726
Like this.
195
00:09:14,181 --> 00:09:15,349
Delectable.
196
00:09:16,133 --> 00:09:17,797
See, that way one glass lasts all night.
197
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:20,881
Look, I'm spending all this money,
198
00:09:20,905 --> 00:09:23,430
and I'm not making no
brownie points with my son.
199
00:09:23,750 --> 00:09:25,781
I'm gonna set this down.
I'm getting the check.
200
00:09:26,820 --> 00:09:28,105
I'd like to say a few words.
201
00:09:28,203 --> 00:09:29,640
Reggie!
202
00:09:31,492 --> 00:09:33,396
Getting to know this man and his friends
203
00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:35,156
has been a privilege and an honor.
204
00:09:35,445 --> 00:09:37,550
Well, that certainly wasa
few words. Thank you, Reggie.
205
00:09:37,574 --> 00:09:39,054
Thanks for opening. Have a seat.
206
00:09:39,695 --> 00:09:41,335
Have a seat, Reggie.
207
00:09:44,148 --> 00:09:45,320
Good evening, everyone.
208
00:09:45,765 --> 00:09:46,765
Hank!
209
00:09:50,108 --> 00:09:54,389
Well, what a fine evening
I have provided for you all.
210
00:09:54,722 --> 00:09:57,803
And to my son and his now
unrecognizable friends,
211
00:09:58,264 --> 00:10:00,902
and his, uh, mama's
side piece down there,
212
00:10:01,748 --> 00:10:03,818
I want to say it's getting late,
213
00:10:03,861 --> 00:10:06,928
so forks up, hands down, got to go.
214
00:10:07,905 --> 00:10:08,910
Dad, it's 7:15.
215
00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:13,467
7:15? Well, what is
this check doing here?
216
00:10:13,567 --> 00:10:14,780
I know I didn't ask for it.
217
00:10:16,405 --> 00:10:18,444
Ooh, this thing is heavy.
I'm scared to open it up.
218
00:10:18,507 --> 00:10:20,514
Oh, just do it, bud. Like a Band-Aid.
219
00:10:21,319 --> 00:10:24,451
All right, no matter
what the figure is inside,
220
00:10:24,983 --> 00:10:26,493
I will not react.
221
00:10:28,095 --> 00:10:30,115
Son of a bitch!
222
00:10:33,991 --> 00:10:35,530
What a deal!
223
00:10:43,423 --> 00:10:45,577
- Surprise!
- Surprise!
224
00:10:45,602 --> 00:10:47,794
It's your ex-husband's friends.
225
00:10:49,298 --> 00:10:51,343
This is the bachelorette party, right?
226
00:10:51,648 --> 00:10:54,413
Sure. But what the heck
are you two doing here?
227
00:10:54,952 --> 00:10:56,610
We want to celebrate
the upcoming nuptials
228
00:10:56,653 --> 00:10:58,350
of our favorite couple, Tony
229
00:10:58,394 --> 00:10:59,917
and... bride.
230
00:11:00,062 --> 00:11:02,839
Yeah, it's not like
we lost all our money,
231
00:11:02,872 --> 00:11:06,466
can't afford drinks, and are
trying to glom on to your thing.
232
00:11:07,474 --> 00:11:10,403
Anyhoo, what are you drinking?
233
00:11:10,559 --> 00:11:12,403
Martinis? Appletinis?
234
00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:14,747
Any tinis going on in here?
235
00:11:15,075 --> 00:11:16,949
Well, we're just staying in tonight.
236
00:11:16,981 --> 00:11:18,341
The wedding's early tomorrow.
237
00:11:21,802 --> 00:11:23,161
Oh.
238
00:11:24,895 --> 00:11:26,474
Looking good, ladies.
239
00:11:27,153 --> 00:11:29,106
This is supposed to cheer me up?
240
00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:31,488
They are whitening their friggin' teeth.
241
00:11:31,513 --> 00:11:32,957
- Uh...
- Let's just go down to the bar
242
00:11:32,981 --> 00:11:35,411
- and play Guess Who's a Prostitute.
- No.
243
00:11:35,661 --> 00:11:38,341
We're gonna have fun tonight.
I'm gonna make this happen.
244
00:11:38,622 --> 00:11:40,505
You want to have fun,
don't you, Lorraine?
245
00:11:40,833 --> 00:11:42,220
Of course I do, but I promised
246
00:11:42,256 --> 00:11:44,800
Reggie and Tony that
I'd-I'd behave myself.
247
00:11:44,825 --> 00:11:46,684
Apparently, when I party in Vegas,
248
00:11:46,927 --> 00:11:48,923
I hurt and embarrass the ones I love.
249
00:11:49,559 --> 00:11:51,261
Hurting and embarrassing
the ones you love
250
00:11:51,286 --> 00:11:53,130
is what Vegas is all about.
251
00:11:53,309 --> 00:11:55,380
Come on, I want to be
Vegas Margaret tonight.
252
00:11:55,802 --> 00:11:58,856
And I bet you there's a Vegas
Lorraine in there somewhere.
253
00:11:59,020 --> 00:12:00,778
Oh, yeah, there is.
254
00:12:00,966 --> 00:12:02,145
She's wild.
255
00:12:02,170 --> 00:12:03,513
She's wild!
256
00:12:05,090 --> 00:12:07,074
I promised... I promised
I'd stay in the room.
257
00:12:07,504 --> 00:12:09,348
Well, then we'll make
the fun come to us.
258
00:12:10,039 --> 00:12:11,345
Come on, you guys.
259
00:12:11,832 --> 00:12:14,323
This is your bride's
last night of freedom.
260
00:12:14,348 --> 00:12:17,035
Don't you want to blow
it out, make it memorable?
261
00:12:17,746 --> 00:12:20,067
Sweetie, I know that you don't know me,
262
00:12:20,129 --> 00:12:22,356
but marriage is boring as hell.
263
00:12:22,793 --> 00:12:25,770
The same guy every single night?
264
00:12:26,059 --> 00:12:29,417
This is your last chance to
grab a beef cake by both cheeks
265
00:12:29,442 --> 00:12:30,746
and let him do his thing.
266
00:12:33,784 --> 00:12:36,370
Well, I don't know what that
was, but I'll take it as a yes.
267
00:12:37,190 --> 00:12:39,932
You twisted my arm. Just give
me a minute to get ready.
268
00:12:40,901 --> 00:12:42,533
Sha-bam!
269
00:12:44,299 --> 00:12:47,025
Ah! I was gonna sneak out
after they fell asleep.
270
00:12:47,143 --> 00:12:48,765
Lorraine!
271
00:12:50,610 --> 00:12:52,908
Thanks again for dinner, Dad.
Want to come hit the tables?
272
00:12:53,088 --> 00:12:54,354
Yeah, I'll be there in a minute, son.
273
00:12:54,378 --> 00:12:56,393
I can't wait to gamble
the money I definitely have.
274
00:12:58,393 --> 00:13:01,611
Okay. I made a few calls,
but none of them panned out.
275
00:13:02,307 --> 00:13:04,416
Turns out that Robbie
Restaurants is dead,
276
00:13:04,727 --> 00:13:07,038
Harry Hubcaps is in jail
and the only guy I could
277
00:13:07,072 --> 00:13:08,682
get on the phone was Mikey Mumbles.
278
00:13:08,742 --> 00:13:10,862
- What did he say?
- Couldn't understand a word of it.
279
00:13:11,611 --> 00:13:14,096
Damn. I'm gonna look like
a idiot in front of my son.
280
00:13:14,369 --> 00:13:15,994
Reggie's just gonna love that.
281
00:13:16,143 --> 00:13:17,307
I can't afford this.
282
00:13:18,041 --> 00:13:19,494
Well, there is one other option.
283
00:13:20,282 --> 00:13:21,532
Dine and dash?
284
00:13:21,807 --> 00:13:24,541
At our age, it's more
"gobble and hobble," but, yes.
285
00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:26,877
- Gentlemen. Is there a problem?
- Oh!
286
00:13:27,189 --> 00:13:28,252
Where the hell did you...?
287
00:13:28,580 --> 00:13:30,328
Wha... What, were you spying on us?
288
00:13:30,627 --> 00:13:32,508
We have a policy of watching anyone
289
00:13:32,533 --> 00:13:35,260
who screams "son of a bitch"
when they get their bill.
290
00:13:35,961 --> 00:13:39,057
You know what, if I can get
Tommy Two Tux on the phone,
291
00:13:39,213 --> 00:13:41,296
you are gonna be done in this town.
292
00:13:41,502 --> 00:13:44,666
Yeah. I just don't think
that's a real person, so...
293
00:13:45,745 --> 00:13:46,900
Don't play dumb.
294
00:13:47,299 --> 00:13:48,869
He always wears two tuxes?
295
00:13:49,041 --> 00:13:52,291
Half black, half white,
split right down the middle?
296
00:13:52,612 --> 00:13:55,189
I believe you're
describing a Batman villain?
297
00:13:56,697 --> 00:13:58,244
Hey, I thought you were right behind us.
298
00:13:58,268 --> 00:14:00,244
Dad, all these women
keep hitting on Reggie.
299
00:14:00,330 --> 00:14:01,345
It's hilarious.
300
00:14:02,454 --> 00:14:03,572
Is there a problem over here?
301
00:14:03,596 --> 00:14:04,861
You the problem, man.
302
00:14:05,025 --> 00:14:07,931
This man is trying to steal my son.
303
00:14:08,275 --> 00:14:09,658
Amber Alert!
304
00:14:09,869 --> 00:14:13,650
- This man trying to steal my little boy.
- Dad, calm down.
305
00:14:13,807 --> 00:14:16,439
- Don't scream "Amber Alert."
- Not trying to steal anyone.
306
00:14:16,592 --> 00:14:18,768
We're talking about an adult
son, by the way. He's 40.
307
00:14:18,869 --> 00:14:22,408
This man is trying to hug my little boy.
308
00:14:23,588 --> 00:14:25,580
Okay, I'm gonna walk away from this.
309
00:14:26,830 --> 00:14:28,142
What's your deal?
310
00:14:28,791 --> 00:14:30,622
Why'd you have to make a
scene and spoil a great dinner?
311
00:14:30,646 --> 00:14:32,801
It was great for you
and your big-ass friends.
312
00:14:33,010 --> 00:14:34,611
Me? All I had is half a salad.
313
00:14:35,314 --> 00:14:37,868
- Forget it.
- Tony, wait a minute.
314
00:14:37,893 --> 00:14:40,205
Sir, you can't leave without
paying your bill. Security.
315
00:14:41,008 --> 00:14:43,150
I found a fingernail in my salad.
316
00:14:44,689 --> 00:14:45,689
Really?
317
00:14:45,830 --> 00:14:47,478
You're gonna bring your goons in?
318
00:14:47,603 --> 00:14:49,290
All right, here's what
is going to happen.
319
00:14:49,407 --> 00:14:53,181
You are going to let us
walk out of here right now.
320
00:14:54,129 --> 00:14:55,129
Take him, too.
321
00:15:08,090 --> 00:15:10,361
That's how Mama likes it. Yeah!
322
00:15:11,462 --> 00:15:14,555
Ooh, yeah, boy. Earn that tuition.
323
00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:16,025
Earn it.
324
00:15:16,377 --> 00:15:17,784
I love Vegas, Lorraine.
325
00:15:17,827 --> 00:15:20,400
I love how you call
your hands dong tongs.
326
00:15:21,009 --> 00:15:22,142
Snap, snap.
327
00:15:22,377 --> 00:15:23,955
Can't control my dong tongs.
328
00:15:25,541 --> 00:15:27,968
Hey, wait, wait. Where's
your little buddy?
329
00:15:28,011 --> 00:15:30,125
Oh, he's nursing a bad breakup.
330
00:15:30,150 --> 00:15:31,556
I've been trying to
cheer him up all night.
331
00:15:31,580 --> 00:15:33,557
- He's probably in the bathroom crying.
- Oh...
332
00:15:34,736 --> 00:15:36,259
Fire in the hole!
333
00:15:41,471 --> 00:15:43,853
My stripper name is Backdraft.
334
00:15:44,080 --> 00:15:45,637
Oh!
335
00:15:45,978 --> 00:15:48,548
Go Vegas Sid!
336
00:15:50,118 --> 00:15:51,181
Oh!
337
00:15:51,533 --> 00:15:53,111
Oh, that must be the other stripper.
338
00:15:58,400 --> 00:15:59,978
Ooh. Look at this one.
339
00:16:01,814 --> 00:16:03,094
Ma'am, we got a noise complaint.
340
00:16:03,134 --> 00:16:06,789
Okay, so your thing is
that you don't work out
341
00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:09,119
so that you look like a regular schlub.
342
00:16:09,212 --> 00:16:10,358
I dig it.
343
00:16:10,401 --> 00:16:12,229
Ma'am, I'm the head of hotel security.
344
00:16:12,361 --> 00:16:14,797
Hey. Hey, can we turn
off the music, please?
345
00:16:14,841 --> 00:16:16,886
Well, how are you gonna dance?
346
00:16:16,930 --> 00:16:18,572
Oh, he looks pissed.
347
00:16:18,673 --> 00:16:20,251
I better cool him off.
348
00:16:25,677 --> 00:16:27,157
Take it off!
349
00:16:29,664 --> 00:16:30,798
Ha, ha, ha.
350
00:16:34,290 --> 00:16:37,167
Hey, Hank. Don't worry,
bud, I'll get us out of here.
351
00:16:37,211 --> 00:16:40,461
Before they took our phones,
I left a message with Tommy Two Tux.
352
00:16:40,649 --> 00:16:44,352
Charlie, I'm sick of your made-up
stories about your made-up friends.
353
00:16:44,484 --> 00:16:45,750
We need a real plan.
354
00:16:46,274 --> 00:16:48,375
We got to get in touch
with Margaret and Sid.
355
00:16:51,703 --> 00:16:53,270
Hank? Charlie?
356
00:16:53,719 --> 00:16:55,070
Margaret, thank God.
357
00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:56,602
Are y'all here to bail us out?
358
00:16:57,413 --> 00:16:58,438
Nope.
359
00:17:09,852 --> 00:17:12,742
My son's wedding's in an hour.
I guess I'm gonna miss it.
360
00:17:13,430 --> 00:17:14,687
Well, what does it matter?
361
00:17:14,712 --> 00:17:16,153
Reggie's his daddy now, anyway.
362
00:17:16,881 --> 00:17:19,233
Shut up, Hank. You know, you...
363
00:17:19,624 --> 00:17:22,741
You know what your
problem is, Hank is...
364
00:17:28,482 --> 00:17:29,600
Mother of my child.
365
00:17:31,288 --> 00:17:34,061
- I shouldn't have come here.
- Me either.
366
00:17:34,850 --> 00:17:37,280
I wish I was home, looking
at pictures of John.
367
00:17:37,741 --> 00:17:39,153
I also wish I had some pants.
368
00:17:39,178 --> 00:17:41,100
It's freezing here in the big house.
369
00:17:42,639 --> 00:17:45,905
Can't believe that Tommy Two
Tux didn't show up for us.
370
00:17:46,358 --> 00:17:47,889
Will you listen to the three of you?
371
00:17:48,163 --> 00:17:50,154
You know what? Vegas
Margaret is not gonna sit here
372
00:17:50,178 --> 00:17:52,072
and listen to you sad sacks complaining.
373
00:17:52,303 --> 00:17:53,591
Here's the deal, Hank.
374
00:17:54,373 --> 00:17:56,077
Reggie has more money than you do.
375
00:17:56,170 --> 00:17:58,881
Reggie will always have
more money than you do,
376
00:17:59,170 --> 00:18:02,458
and he will be better looking, and
he will be more charming...
377
00:18:02,483 --> 00:18:03,741
Get to the point.
378
00:18:04,397 --> 00:18:05,842
You can't control all of that.
379
00:18:05,867 --> 00:18:08,482
What you can control is your
relationship with your son,
380
00:18:08,507 --> 00:18:10,984
so stop moping and go talk to him.
381
00:18:11,320 --> 00:18:13,576
And you, Sid, you can
have a John pity party
382
00:18:13,601 --> 00:18:16,499
for the rest of your life,
or you can choose to move on.
383
00:18:16,788 --> 00:18:19,492
And Charlie, it's time to stop lying.
384
00:18:19,882 --> 00:18:21,693
We love you. You don't
have to keep making up
385
00:18:21,718 --> 00:18:24,515
these crazy stories
about your fake past.
386
00:18:25,267 --> 00:18:26,765
Ah.
387
00:18:29,192 --> 00:18:30,933
If it ain't Charlie Sell Phones.
388
00:18:30,984 --> 00:18:33,546
- You're looking good.
- Tommy Two Tux.
389
00:18:33,999 --> 00:18:35,077
You're not.
390
00:18:36,112 --> 00:18:37,921
- You were saying, Margaret?
- Oh.
391
00:18:38,437 --> 00:18:41,022
Marone. Get a load of the
outfit on this broad, eh?
392
00:18:43,546 --> 00:18:44,849
Look, you guys are free to go.
393
00:18:44,874 --> 00:18:45,896
- Oh.
- Yeah.
394
00:18:45,921 --> 00:18:48,702
Oh, FYI... uh, that
manager at that restaurant
395
00:18:48,725 --> 00:18:50,778
- Yeah.
- Yeah. He's gonna be mopping stalls
396
00:18:50,803 --> 00:18:53,631
at the Hard Rock from now on.
397
00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:57,014
Charlie, you came through.
398
00:18:57,639 --> 00:19:00,482
Looks like I'm gonna make
my son's wedding after all.
399
00:19:02,356 --> 00:19:03,412
Lorraine.
400
00:19:04,568 --> 00:19:05,576
Lorraine!
401
00:19:08,068 --> 00:19:09,100
Last call.
402
00:19:09,449 --> 00:19:10,568
Vodka tonic.
403
00:19:17,365 --> 00:19:19,165
- Are you ready?
- Ready, man. I'm ready, man.
404
00:19:19,248 --> 00:19:21,608
- That's what I'm talking about.
- Let's do it. Let's do it.
405
00:19:21,982 --> 00:19:22,985
Oh, there you are, Dad.
406
00:19:23,943 --> 00:19:25,193
Thanks for dressing up.
407
00:19:26,357 --> 00:19:28,381
Hey, guys. Will you, uh,
excuse us for a minute?
408
00:19:28,469 --> 00:19:29,615
Yeah.
409
00:19:31,028 --> 00:19:32,548
You know, there's food in the hallway.
410
00:19:35,498 --> 00:19:36,975
Listen...
411
00:19:37,264 --> 00:19:38,795
I want to apologize.
412
00:19:39,592 --> 00:19:41,756
I know I was acting crazy,
413
00:19:42,568 --> 00:19:43,615
'cause...
414
00:19:43,928 --> 00:19:46,709
I just feel like Reggie's
replacing me, man.
415
00:19:46,857 --> 00:19:47,935
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
416
00:19:48,467 --> 00:19:49,779
Come on, I like Reggie.
417
00:19:50,272 --> 00:19:51,287
He's my friend.
418
00:19:51,872 --> 00:19:52,872
But you're my dad.
419
00:19:53,227 --> 00:19:54,506
There's no replacing you.
420
00:19:55,658 --> 00:19:56,690
And if this is about Reggie hosting
421
00:19:56,714 --> 00:19:58,634
- the wedding, then...
- No, it's more than that.
422
00:19:59,025 --> 00:20:00,618
Y'all just seem like you're closer.
423
00:20:00,704 --> 00:20:05,204
You know, with the trips,
the hugs, all the inside jokes.
424
00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:06,848
Yeah, but that's never been your style.
425
00:20:06,922 --> 00:20:08,291
No, it ha-never has.
426
00:20:08,704 --> 00:20:09,711
But I want it to be.
427
00:20:10,086 --> 00:20:12,305
I want to be there for you from now on.
428
00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:14,186
And I want to be a part of your wedding.
429
00:20:14,406 --> 00:20:15,429
I'd love that.
430
00:20:15,646 --> 00:20:18,432
All right. And I'm gonna
walk you down the aisle.
431
00:20:18,969 --> 00:20:20,579
You ever been to a wedding?
That's not something...
432
00:20:20,603 --> 00:20:24,860
I'm walking you down that aisle.
433
00:20:24,885 --> 00:20:26,561
- Okay, Pop. Okay, okay.
- Okay.
434
00:20:26,837 --> 00:20:29,189
- So, how you feeling?
- Uh...
435
00:20:29,275 --> 00:20:31,657
- a little nervous, to be honest.
- Well, that's natural, man.
436
00:20:31,681 --> 00:20:33,470
You don't have to be strong, okay?
437
00:20:33,517 --> 00:20:35,144
'Cause you can be weak
438
00:20:35,188 --> 00:20:38,191
knowing that your daddy
is gonna be your rock.
439
00:20:39,888 --> 00:20:42,267
This... this my baby.
440
00:20:42,533 --> 00:20:44,063
My little baby boy.
441
00:20:44,308 --> 00:20:45,321
You get...
442
00:20:45,372 --> 00:20:47,017
Oh, I'm not gonna make it.
443
00:20:47,192 --> 00:20:50,543
Oh, I'm just... just joyful.
444
00:20:52,248 --> 00:20:54,004
You done found your queen.
445
00:20:54,074 --> 00:20:55,338
All right, then.
446
00:20:55,863 --> 00:20:57,152
Oh, he gonna...
447
00:20:58,051 --> 00:20:59,371
Ooh!
448
00:21:00,848 --> 00:21:04,316
Oh, that's my son! Lord!
449
00:21:05,863 --> 00:21:07,027
Here she comes.
450
00:21:08,176 --> 00:21:11,848
Oh!
451
00:21:12,051 --> 00:21:13,729
She look like a angel,
452
00:21:13,754 --> 00:21:16,402
like she's just floating on in.
453
00:21:17,168 --> 00:21:20,496
Oh. Oh!
454
00:21:23,410 --> 00:21:26,339
Eyes on the prize. She's
coming to get you, Tony...
455
00:21:28,675 --> 00:21:30,792
For ever and ever and ever and ever.
34096
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