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1
00:00:09,906 --> 00:00:12,141
Kids, it happens to be
our anniversary today,
2
00:00:12,175 --> 00:00:14,477
so it might be a nice idea
if you wished your mother
3
00:00:14,510 --> 00:00:15,945
a happy anniversary.
4
00:00:15,978 --> 00:00:17,847
Okay, um...
5
00:00:17,881 --> 00:00:19,718
What would you like us to say?
6
00:00:20,516 --> 00:00:22,083
Well, you could start by saying,
7
00:00:22,117 --> 00:00:23,553
"Happy anniversary."
8
00:00:24,500 --> 00:00:26,254
Mmm, okay, but why are we wishing her
9
00:00:26,289 --> 00:00:27,690
a happy anniversary?
10
00:00:27,992 --> 00:00:29,288
Isn't that something that you two
11
00:00:29,323 --> 00:00:30,405
are supposed to say to each other?
12
00:00:30,431 --> 00:00:32,531
Yeah, it's called
being courteous, honey.
13
00:00:32,826 --> 00:00:34,893
You know, the Bloomfield kids
used to throw their parents
14
00:00:34,927 --> 00:00:36,728
an anniversary party every year.
15
00:00:36,764 --> 00:00:38,965
Mhmm... um, if we're truth telling,
16
00:00:38,999 --> 00:00:41,299
the Bloomfields were
always a little too friendly
17
00:00:41,335 --> 00:00:42,768
with one another.
18
00:00:42,802 --> 00:00:44,302
I just don't understand
what kind of family
19
00:00:44,338 --> 00:00:46,328
skinny dips together.
20
00:00:46,606 --> 00:00:48,006
John, are you ready?
21
00:00:48,042 --> 00:00:49,131
Yes, sweetheart.
22
00:00:49,156 --> 00:00:51,377
Happy anniversary!
23
00:00:51,411 --> 00:00:54,447
Congratulations on your
ongoing love for one another.
24
00:00:54,481 --> 00:00:55,795
You did it!
25
00:00:56,049 --> 00:00:57,549
Okay kids, that's enough.
26
00:00:57,584 --> 00:00:59,750
You sound like the
incestuous Bloomfields.
27
00:00:59,811 --> 00:01:01,554
Have a blessed day.
28
00:01:04,424 --> 00:01:09,227
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
29
00:01:10,897 --> 00:01:12,965
Ahem! Hello there, Roses.
30
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,466
- Hello there, you!
- Yes...
31
00:01:14,501 --> 00:01:15,935
May we join you?
32
00:01:15,968 --> 00:01:18,504
- Oh, we just ordered to go.
- Yeah, we're not staying,
33
00:01:18,539 --> 00:01:20,039
we've got a million things to do.
34
00:01:20,073 --> 00:01:22,108
Oh, well then, I guess you don't want
35
00:01:22,141 --> 00:01:24,043
your present then, huh?
36
00:01:25,978 --> 00:01:27,713
You wanna guess what your present is?
37
00:01:27,748 --> 00:01:29,781
- No, I do not.
- Dinner!
38
00:01:30,045 --> 00:01:32,116
We're gifting you a dinner!
39
00:01:32,352 --> 00:01:35,420
At the most exclusive eatery in Elmdale.
40
00:01:35,456 --> 00:01:37,390
- Oh.
- It's very hard to get a table.
41
00:01:37,424 --> 00:01:39,658
But uh, I pulled a few strings.
42
00:01:39,692 --> 00:01:42,594
That sounds too good
to... what's the catch?
43
00:01:42,628 --> 00:01:44,162
No, there's-there's no catch,
44
00:01:44,198 --> 00:01:47,061
just every new council
member gets a dinner, so.
45
00:01:47,468 --> 00:01:50,002
Oh, how very civilized.
46
00:01:50,037 --> 00:01:53,438
It is... thank you, Roland. We accept.
47
00:01:53,473 --> 00:01:55,775
Terrific, so we'll pick
you up around seven.
48
00:01:55,808 --> 00:01:57,944
- We?
- Yeah, we have a coupon.
49
00:01:57,978 --> 00:02:00,078
Four entrees for the price of three,
50
00:02:00,114 --> 00:02:01,819
it expires soon, though.
51
00:02:02,081 --> 00:02:04,417
It should be really fun, you guys.
52
00:02:04,450 --> 00:02:06,885
Yes, it will be fun...
53
00:02:06,920 --> 00:02:08,253
Well, it would be fun,
54
00:02:08,288 --> 00:02:10,823
if today were not our anniversary.
55
00:02:11,007 --> 00:02:13,658
- Yeah...
- Wow, happy anniversary!
56
00:02:13,693 --> 00:02:15,461
Well, thank you, thank you.
57
00:02:15,496 --> 00:02:17,896
You two are obviously
gonna want to spend tonight
58
00:02:17,920 --> 00:02:19,078
just the two of you, so...
59
00:02:19,103 --> 00:02:21,234
- Yes, that was the plan.
- Yeah.
60
00:02:21,268 --> 00:02:23,034
Oh, well you know, the coupon expires
61
00:02:23,069 --> 00:02:24,603
in three weeks, so...
62
00:02:24,638 --> 00:02:26,204
Okay, all right, let it go.
63
00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:27,639
You have fun, you guys!
64
00:02:27,674 --> 00:02:29,040
- Okay.
- Okay?
65
00:02:29,075 --> 00:02:31,257
- Bye bye, now.
- Bye!
66
00:02:31,835 --> 00:02:33,846
Boy, that was a close call.
67
00:02:39,819 --> 00:02:41,257
What are you doing with that?
68
00:02:42,545 --> 00:02:44,445
With what, this yearbook?
69
00:02:44,557 --> 00:02:46,085
Could you put it back, please?!
70
00:02:47,608 --> 00:02:49,109
Why would I put it back,
71
00:02:49,134 --> 00:02:51,301
when Stevie Budd was voted:
72
00:02:51,326 --> 00:02:53,382
"Most likely to get the guy."
73
00:02:54,643 --> 00:02:56,210
With that hair cut?!
74
00:02:56,235 --> 00:02:58,870
I'll have you know I was
very popular with the boys.
75
00:02:58,991 --> 00:03:01,060
And girls, it seems.
76
00:03:01,140 --> 00:03:03,508
Wow, well, according to the Internet,
77
00:03:03,842 --> 00:03:06,679
you were "Mister Popular."
78
00:03:06,712 --> 00:03:08,313
I will have you know that that head-shot
79
00:03:08,348 --> 00:03:11,109
got me a two-episode
arc on a TV series.
80
00:03:11,413 --> 00:03:12,481
What series?
81
00:03:13,217 --> 00:03:14,444
"Dateline."
82
00:03:14,801 --> 00:03:18,305
I played a boy who got
abducted from a grocery store.
83
00:03:18,625 --> 00:03:20,026
- Wow.
- Yeah.
84
00:03:20,060 --> 00:03:21,828
And the performance was so riveting,
85
00:03:21,861 --> 00:03:24,710
people thought I actually
was the "Value-mart victim."
86
00:03:24,828 --> 00:03:27,129
Hmm, bet that got you laid.
87
00:03:27,234 --> 00:03:29,889
It did. It really did.
88
00:03:33,406 --> 00:03:34,841
You know, I am surprised
that you haven't asked me
89
00:03:34,875 --> 00:03:36,420
to leave early today.
90
00:03:36,742 --> 00:03:38,281
Are you telepathic or something,
91
00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:40,841
because I have been thinking
about asking you that question
92
00:03:40,866 --> 00:03:42,225
every day this week.
93
00:03:42,515 --> 00:03:44,007
I was just kidding.
94
00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:47,188
Oh... no yeah, me too.
95
00:03:47,213 --> 00:03:50,582
No, just with the big
soiree at Mutt's tonight,
96
00:03:50,656 --> 00:03:53,406
I figured that you would
need ample time to get ready.
97
00:03:54,312 --> 00:03:56,272
Mutt's having a soiree?
98
00:03:56,298 --> 00:03:57,597
Well, I'm sure you're invited.
99
00:03:58,194 --> 00:04:01,329
Yeah, no. Yeah, no, why wouldn't I be?
100
00:04:01,496 --> 00:04:03,530
Um, were you invited?
101
00:04:03,604 --> 00:04:05,003
Yeah. Yeah.
102
00:04:05,038 --> 00:04:08,174
I guess it's just-just
a bit of a pride issue,
103
00:04:08,207 --> 00:04:11,110
you know, do I attend the
party hosted by the guy
104
00:04:11,134 --> 00:04:13,052
that... you left me for?
105
00:04:13,347 --> 00:04:15,213
Yeah, no, I'm sure he wouldn't mind.
106
00:04:15,248 --> 00:04:18,764
Yeah, but I really would
have to basically throw
107
00:04:18,788 --> 00:04:21,353
all my self-respect just
right out the window.
108
00:04:21,387 --> 00:04:23,221
Aww, that's so sweet.
109
00:04:23,257 --> 00:04:25,944
So um, what time is the party tonight?
110
00:04:27,593 --> 00:04:29,829
Happy anniversary, sweetheart.
111
00:04:29,862 --> 00:04:32,531
Oh darling, what a sweet gesture,
112
00:04:32,566 --> 00:04:33,932
and a precursor no doubt,
113
00:04:33,966 --> 00:04:36,108
to something more grand planned.
114
00:04:37,670 --> 00:04:39,038
Something more grand?
115
00:04:39,372 --> 00:04:41,816
Ah, knowing your penchant for surprises,
116
00:04:41,841 --> 00:04:44,685
I'm guessing you have
something else up your sleeve.
117
00:04:46,279 --> 00:04:48,937
- Yes, I do.
- Uh oh!
118
00:04:48,961 --> 00:04:51,297
I do, I...
119
00:04:51,784 --> 00:04:53,031
Was going to tell you later,
120
00:04:53,055 --> 00:04:56,055
but I booked a restaurant in Elmdale,
121
00:04:56,088 --> 00:04:58,423
it's supposed to be very fancy!
122
00:04:58,457 --> 00:05:01,526
The one that Roland and
Jocelyn just told us about?
123
00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:03,629
Yes! Yes, but...
124
00:05:03,663 --> 00:05:05,798
Who knew they were asking us tonight!
125
00:05:05,831 --> 00:05:07,867
- Just the two of us?
- Mhmm.
126
00:05:07,901 --> 00:05:10,502
Sort of a "Lady and the Tramp"
meets "9 1/2 Weeks"
127
00:05:10,536 --> 00:05:12,257
kind of dinner date?
128
00:05:12,505 --> 00:05:14,774
Could for one second
believe that I would not
129
00:05:14,807 --> 00:05:18,163
have planned something...
For our anniversary?
130
00:05:18,586 --> 00:05:19,648
Tonight?
131
00:05:20,814 --> 00:05:21,795
The two of us?
132
00:05:32,045 --> 00:05:34,211
Hi, Rose, party of two.
133
00:05:34,528 --> 00:05:36,329
Yeah, we spoke on the
phone this afternoon.
134
00:05:36,362 --> 00:05:38,163
You're lucky we had that cancellation.
135
00:05:38,197 --> 00:05:39,865
Yes, well, lucky for someone.
136
00:05:39,899 --> 00:05:43,336
We... had a reservation
which I of course made uh,
137
00:05:43,518 --> 00:05:44,975
weeks ago.
138
00:05:45,137 --> 00:05:46,706
You always could swing a good table
139
00:05:46,740 --> 00:05:48,139
at the last minute, John.
140
00:05:49,437 --> 00:05:51,004
Okay, it'll just be a few minutes.
141
00:05:51,028 --> 00:05:52,896
- Thank you.
- Okay.
142
00:05:52,980 --> 00:05:54,225
Moira?
143
00:05:54,639 --> 00:05:55,973
- Bev?
- Don!
144
00:05:55,997 --> 00:05:57,365
- Moira!
- Bev!
145
00:05:57,389 --> 00:05:59,091
Oh my God, the Roses! You're alive!
146
00:05:59,115 --> 00:06:00,684
- Ohhhh!
- Oh my gosh!
147
00:06:00,709 --> 00:06:03,244
- Good to see you!
- Wow! What? Don?
148
00:06:03,423 --> 00:06:06,255
- Oh, I don't believe it!
- Come on, Don!
149
00:06:06,281 --> 00:06:07,625
Muah! Muah!
150
00:06:07,661 --> 00:06:09,127
What are you two doing here?
151
00:06:09,161 --> 00:06:10,829
Well, we were dropping
MacKenzie off at college,
152
00:06:10,863 --> 00:06:12,630
and decided we'd take
the scenic route home.
153
00:06:12,665 --> 00:06:15,134
You must... they should...
you must join us!
154
00:06:15,168 --> 00:06:16,634
Join us for dinner!
155
00:06:16,670 --> 00:06:18,069
- Well-oh, yes!
- That would be great!
156
00:06:18,105 --> 00:06:21,574
We are just dying to find
out what you've been up to!
157
00:06:21,608 --> 00:06:23,475
We're dying to tell you!
158
00:06:23,509 --> 00:06:24,910
Okay.
159
00:06:24,944 --> 00:06:26,992
Ohhh...
160
00:06:40,026 --> 00:06:41,694
Oh, I wouldn't do that if I were you.
161
00:06:41,728 --> 00:06:43,129
Oh, I wouldn't either,
162
00:06:43,163 --> 00:06:44,529
but I couldn't find a cocktail shaker,
163
00:06:44,564 --> 00:06:46,952
and someone brought
room temperature vodka.
164
00:06:47,266 --> 00:06:50,668
N-no, I mean... Mutt made those
ice cubes from well water,
165
00:06:50,704 --> 00:06:53,072
so... they smell a little fishy.
166
00:06:53,105 --> 00:06:54,264
Oh.
167
00:06:54,774 --> 00:06:56,509
Yeah, wouldn't want
that melting in my drink,
168
00:06:56,543 --> 00:06:57,877
thank you very much.
169
00:06:57,911 --> 00:07:00,446
- I'm Jake.
- David.
170
00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:02,156
It's nice to meet you, handsome.
171
00:07:07,846 --> 00:07:10,848
I-I'll-I'm gonna...
So I'll just...
172
00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:17,596
Wow! Look at you.
173
00:07:17,630 --> 00:07:19,365
What's that supposed to mean?
174
00:07:19,399 --> 00:07:21,406
No, I've just never seen
you this dressed up before.
175
00:07:21,951 --> 00:07:23,615
I do what I want.
176
00:07:23,836 --> 00:07:27,038
And tonight, I'm
wanting to meet someone.
177
00:07:27,074 --> 00:07:28,139
Hmm.
178
00:07:28,165 --> 00:07:29,817
So, I have a certain
high school reputation
179
00:07:29,843 --> 00:07:31,310
I need to live up to.
180
00:07:31,343 --> 00:07:32,978
Uh huh, yeah, and good luck with that.
181
00:07:33,012 --> 00:07:35,180
Um, speaking of sexual popularity,
182
00:07:35,215 --> 00:07:40,000
I'm pretty sure that
um... that guy at the bar,
183
00:07:41,288 --> 00:07:42,459
is into me.
184
00:07:43,055 --> 00:07:45,812
- Who, Jake?
- Yeah. Jake.
185
00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:50,470
Why, was he one of your
high school conquests?
186
00:07:50,502 --> 00:07:51,757
Actually, no.
187
00:07:51,783 --> 00:07:54,266
But I have a pretty stellar
radar for being able to tell
188
00:07:54,300 --> 00:07:55,701
when guys are into me.
189
00:07:55,735 --> 00:07:59,406
Mhmm... um, and having
swam in both ponds,
190
00:08:00,045 --> 00:08:02,708
I can say that I might be
able to navigate those waters
191
00:08:02,742 --> 00:08:04,452
a little but better than you.
192
00:08:04,711 --> 00:08:07,713
Uh huh? Well, we'll see.
193
00:08:07,747 --> 00:08:09,348
Hmm.
194
00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:24,353
So-so there we are at Izzy
Tennison's country home...
195
00:08:24,387 --> 00:08:26,754
Oh, tell me she doesn't
still have that stuffed bison.
196
00:08:26,790 --> 00:08:28,490
Oh, does she have it?
197
00:08:28,524 --> 00:08:30,750
She's moved it to the front hall!
198
00:08:30,774 --> 00:08:31,459
What?!
199
00:08:31,483 --> 00:08:33,904
Grier wanted to hang
her coat on the horns!
200
00:08:35,999 --> 00:08:38,200
And it gets better. Don here...
201
00:08:38,234 --> 00:08:39,600
Oh, wait now, don't
throw me under the bus,
202
00:08:39,635 --> 00:08:41,135
it was Borden who started it all.
203
00:08:41,171 --> 00:08:42,971
Borden Simons?
204
00:08:43,005 --> 00:08:44,807
It's like old home week!
205
00:08:45,418 --> 00:08:48,452
Anyway, I look over,
206
00:08:48,477 --> 00:08:51,547
and Don and Borden are
on their hands and knees,
207
00:08:51,581 --> 00:08:54,817
crawling through the
doggie door in the kitchen!
208
00:08:54,850 --> 00:08:59,086
It was too funny!
209
00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:01,389
- Oh, you should've been there.
- Oh, wish we could've been.
210
00:09:01,423 --> 00:09:04,405
- Maybe next time.
- Well, cheers to that!
211
00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:06,208
Cheers.
212
00:09:08,628 --> 00:09:11,897
Hey uh... Johnny? Moira?
213
00:09:11,922 --> 00:09:14,139
Oh my God!
214
00:09:14,164 --> 00:09:16,085
Um, what are you guys doing here?
215
00:09:16,999 --> 00:09:19,433
Well, we-we just ran into each other.
216
00:09:19,741 --> 00:09:21,109
It's their anniversary, Roland,
217
00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:22,644
just let them do what they want.
218
00:09:22,678 --> 00:09:24,145
It's your anniversary?
You should've told us!
219
00:09:24,179 --> 00:09:25,327
We don't want to intrude.
220
00:09:25,352 --> 00:09:28,317
No, you're not intruding,
this is a surprise treat.
221
00:09:28,350 --> 00:09:31,687
Oh, okay, well then, are we intruding?
222
00:09:31,721 --> 00:09:33,388
Because before you were saying
223
00:09:33,423 --> 00:09:35,437
that you didn't wanna
go out tonight, so...
224
00:09:36,024 --> 00:09:38,025
No, no, we-we uh...
225
00:09:38,061 --> 00:09:39,695
You can certainly join us,
226
00:09:39,729 --> 00:09:41,421
if you don't have your own table.
227
00:09:41,509 --> 00:09:43,144
We do, but that would be great!
228
00:09:43,427 --> 00:09:45,830
- Okay!
- Yes, well then, by all means,
229
00:09:45,855 --> 00:09:49,691
yes, let's uh-let's...
Let's all sit at one table.
230
00:09:49,716 --> 00:09:51,716
- This is cozy. Hello.
- Hi.
231
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:53,709
Good evening.
232
00:10:09,926 --> 00:10:12,125
Wow. Look at you.
233
00:10:12,629 --> 00:10:14,263
Is it weird that I'm here?
234
00:10:14,297 --> 00:10:15,697
It's only weird if you think it's weird.
235
00:10:15,731 --> 00:10:18,200
Yeah. Okay. I don't if you don't.
236
00:10:18,234 --> 00:10:20,635
Um, in fact, I don't actually
know how late I can stay.
237
00:10:20,669 --> 00:10:24,105
I just wanted to pop in, and say hey.
238
00:10:24,139 --> 00:10:26,523
Well, you're awfully
dolled up for a "pop in."
239
00:10:26,688 --> 00:10:30,057
Oh my God, stop, I
basically came from work.
240
00:10:30,082 --> 00:10:32,217
Babe, your stove's being testy again,
241
00:10:32,243 --> 00:10:33,677
should I just serve the cider cold?
242
00:10:33,701 --> 00:10:38,639
Uh... Alexis, this is uh, my girlfriend,
243
00:10:38,788 --> 00:10:41,789
Tennessee. Wow!
244
00:10:41,823 --> 00:10:43,570
Wow. Woweee.
245
00:10:43,595 --> 00:10:45,596
Alexis, hi.
246
00:10:45,761 --> 00:10:47,129
It's so nice to finally meet you,
247
00:10:47,163 --> 00:10:48,830
Mutt's told me so much about you.
248
00:10:48,865 --> 00:10:51,171
The way he describes you,
it's like you're this...
249
00:10:51,898 --> 00:10:53,567
Beautiful little poem.
250
00:10:53,602 --> 00:10:55,803
Well, love "little!"
251
00:10:55,837 --> 00:10:58,740
Look at you! You're like a poem too.
252
00:10:58,774 --> 00:11:02,344
Like, a really pretty poem, or like,
253
00:11:02,378 --> 00:11:04,296
a mermaid, or something.
254
00:11:04,614 --> 00:11:06,695
Mutt, you're growing back your beard.
255
00:11:07,046 --> 00:11:10,018
Yeah, she likes it.
256
00:11:10,052 --> 00:11:11,335
Okay.
257
00:11:12,288 --> 00:11:16,158
Um, okay uh, I'm gonna go grab a drink.
258
00:11:16,192 --> 00:11:19,327
But um, it was so nice
to finally meet you,
259
00:11:19,361 --> 00:11:20,639
Tallahassee, so...
260
00:11:20,664 --> 00:11:23,331
- It's ah, Tennessee.
- Yes, Tennessee.
261
00:11:23,365 --> 00:11:25,937
I love that name, it's so unique.
262
00:11:26,269 --> 00:11:27,668
Um, thank God you look the way you do,
263
00:11:27,703 --> 00:11:29,859
because that name on the
wrong girl would just...
264
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:31,556
Ooh! So...
265
00:11:31,581 --> 00:11:33,225
You should feel really
good about yourself.
266
00:11:35,631 --> 00:11:36,875
She's cute.
267
00:11:38,081 --> 00:11:40,282
You guys haven't ordered yet, have you?
268
00:11:40,316 --> 00:11:43,452
Because I need to present this
coupon to the waiter first.
269
00:11:44,911 --> 00:11:46,592
Don't know what that means.
270
00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:48,413
He's so ironic, this one.
271
00:11:48,438 --> 00:11:50,500
Oh!
272
00:11:50,625 --> 00:11:53,528
So where are you living now, Moira?
273
00:11:53,562 --> 00:11:54,859
Tell us all about it.
274
00:11:54,884 --> 00:11:58,600
Oh, we're in a rustic, ranch style...
275
00:11:58,753 --> 00:12:01,506
Bungalow... that...
276
00:12:02,171 --> 00:12:03,484
It's very nice.
277
00:12:03,509 --> 00:12:06,639
Very nice, it's got plenty of parking,
278
00:12:06,664 --> 00:12:08,442
and a TV in every room.
279
00:12:08,811 --> 00:12:10,592
Oh, how many bedrooms?
280
00:12:10,618 --> 00:12:12,785
- Ten.
- Ten bedrooms!
281
00:12:12,811 --> 00:12:15,979
Yeah, well, we don't
use all the bedrooms.
282
00:12:16,004 --> 00:12:18,504
That must be a nightmare to clean!
283
00:12:18,529 --> 00:12:20,631
Um, Stevie does an adequate job.
284
00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:22,390
- Stevie's one of your staff?
- Mhmm!
285
00:12:22,591 --> 00:12:25,100
Stevie's the only staff.
286
00:12:25,861 --> 00:12:27,763
This olive tapenade is...
287
00:12:27,797 --> 00:12:29,342
Salty, I know!
288
00:12:29,890 --> 00:12:31,457
Is it? I-I thought it was good,
289
00:12:31,889 --> 00:12:33,357
but yeah, it's salty.
290
00:12:34,217 --> 00:12:36,052
Hmm! Here's a funny story.
291
00:12:36,076 --> 00:12:37,273
Oh, good.
292
00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:40,167
On our way here, we
drove through a town...
293
00:12:40,518 --> 00:12:45,588
Not a word of a lie,
called... "Schittstown!"
294
00:12:45,748 --> 00:12:48,482
Oh! No, it was called, "Schittsville!"
295
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:50,317
Schittsville!
296
00:12:50,352 --> 00:12:51,753
And from the looks of it,
297
00:12:51,788 --> 00:12:53,721
the town was living up to its name!
298
00:12:53,755 --> 00:12:56,457
Let's not go for the
low-hanging fruit here, Don.
299
00:12:56,491 --> 00:12:59,538
Okay? No, these are funny jokes.
300
00:12:59,828 --> 00:13:01,616
Please continue, Don.
301
00:13:01,642 --> 00:13:05,381
You see, Roland gets it!
302
00:13:15,778 --> 00:13:17,278
You know, I'm actually
having more fun at this party
303
00:13:17,312 --> 00:13:18,678
than I thought I would.
304
00:13:19,615 --> 00:13:21,125
How did you do it?
305
00:13:21,386 --> 00:13:23,254
Well, I started by drinking all four
306
00:13:23,278 --> 00:13:24,946
of those peach schnapps
that you left in my fridge...
307
00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:27,794
No, I mean you seemed
so cool about everything
308
00:13:27,820 --> 00:13:30,875
after we broke up. It
was almost annoying.
309
00:13:31,711 --> 00:13:32,960
Cool?
310
00:13:33,863 --> 00:13:37,359
Alexis... I couldn't stop crying.
311
00:13:37,746 --> 00:13:39,671
I was scaring all the animals at work.
312
00:13:40,293 --> 00:13:46,780
But when I... had to go on
our honeymoon without you,
313
00:13:47,509 --> 00:13:49,110
the zip line instructor
314
00:13:49,144 --> 00:13:51,645
at the Los Passions
Couples Resort told me
315
00:13:51,681 --> 00:13:53,945
that I just gotta get through it.
316
00:13:56,163 --> 00:13:59,014
Meaning my fear of heights,
which I did get through.
317
00:13:59,290 --> 00:14:02,210
But with you, it just...
318
00:14:02,823 --> 00:14:04,791
It took a little longer.
319
00:14:07,081 --> 00:14:08,327
I'm sorry.
320
00:14:09,297 --> 00:14:10,562
It's okay.
321
00:14:14,474 --> 00:14:15,937
Staff dance?
322
00:14:16,303 --> 00:14:17,971
Yes!
323
00:14:27,350 --> 00:14:28,616
Mmm!
324
00:14:28,642 --> 00:14:31,928
Hmm, I thought I was
shame eating in private.
325
00:14:32,148 --> 00:14:34,383
What is shame eating?
326
00:14:34,408 --> 00:14:36,375
I don't think we have
enough time for that tonight.
327
00:14:38,764 --> 00:14:40,327
Are you looking for someone?
328
00:14:40,467 --> 00:14:42,440
No, yeah, I mean, sorry,
329
00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:45,533
I'm just, I lost my friend
who should... be around here
330
00:14:45,567 --> 00:14:47,836
somewhere um, watching this so.
331
00:14:47,870 --> 00:14:49,225
Are you here with Stevie?
332
00:14:49,528 --> 00:14:51,148
I am. Yeah.
333
00:14:51,740 --> 00:14:53,307
- Okay.
- Not here "with."
334
00:14:53,341 --> 00:14:55,342
No, we're not together,
I'm very much single, so.
335
00:14:55,470 --> 00:14:57,195
You wanna get some air?
336
00:14:57,836 --> 00:14:59,837
Yeah. Uh huh.
337
00:14:59,863 --> 00:15:01,230
Mm! Yeah.
338
00:15:07,288 --> 00:15:08,956
Who do you have to kill around here
339
00:15:08,990 --> 00:15:12,178
to get another bottle
of this undrinkable wine?
340
00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:14,023
I think it's good.
341
00:15:14,328 --> 00:15:16,764
I ordered the one with the
highest alcohol content.
342
00:15:16,985 --> 00:15:18,577
What do you do, Roland?
343
00:15:19,014 --> 00:15:21,788
Something in agriculture,
by the looks of it?
344
00:15:22,573 --> 00:15:25,777
Roland is actually
the mayor of our town.
345
00:15:25,849 --> 00:15:27,273
Oh!
346
00:15:27,298 --> 00:15:28,546
Not Schittsville, I hope!
347
00:15:31,245 --> 00:15:33,302
What do you even call
someone from Schittsville?
348
00:15:33,327 --> 00:15:35,452
A Schitter? A Schitthead?
349
00:15:35,688 --> 00:15:38,178
- Okay, you know what?
- John, John.
350
00:15:38,457 --> 00:15:41,126
Don't worry, Moira, I
won't say anything untoward.
351
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:42,769
We're just having fun, John.
352
00:15:42,793 --> 00:15:44,394
And I thought we were having fun, Bev,
353
00:15:44,419 --> 00:15:45,854
but you know what, we're not.
354
00:15:45,879 --> 00:15:48,113
Oh come on, it's just a joke!
355
00:15:48,230 --> 00:15:50,663
No Don, here's the joke.
356
00:15:51,432 --> 00:15:54,600
The joke is I'm sitting here
in a half decent restaurant
357
00:15:55,017 --> 00:15:58,484
with my wife... and our friends...
358
00:16:00,142 --> 00:16:03,428
And all you two have done
is complain about the food,
359
00:16:03,453 --> 00:16:06,188
and pretend that you
didn't leave us high and dry
360
00:16:06,214 --> 00:16:08,181
after we lost everything.
361
00:16:08,217 --> 00:16:10,153
Oh, we're past all that now.
362
00:16:10,177 --> 00:16:11,835
I'm not quite past it, Moira.
363
00:16:13,489 --> 00:16:14,835
You wrote us off, Don.
364
00:16:16,086 --> 00:16:17,631
Not a phone call,
365
00:16:18,426 --> 00:16:20,070
not an email,
366
00:16:20,721 --> 00:16:22,092
not a nickel.
367
00:16:24,259 --> 00:16:26,393
Roland and Jocelyn here,
368
00:16:26,418 --> 00:16:28,119
could not have been more generous
369
00:16:28,144 --> 00:16:31,256
with what little they have.
370
00:16:32,075 --> 00:16:34,038
They found us a place to live,
371
00:16:34,976 --> 00:16:37,381
they've offered us their
truck whenever we've needed it.
372
00:16:38,484 --> 00:16:40,967
They've invited us to their parties,
373
00:16:41,813 --> 00:16:46,017
they even offered to take
us out to dinner tonight.
374
00:16:46,254 --> 00:16:48,056
Well, just to be clear, Johnny,
375
00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:49,490
we were always gonna split the bill,
376
00:16:49,524 --> 00:16:50,493
it's just with the coupon...
377
00:16:50,518 --> 00:16:51,851
Rollie, Rollie.
378
00:16:56,738 --> 00:16:58,719
And that town you passed through,
379
00:16:59,244 --> 00:17:01,378
it's not called Schittsville.
380
00:17:01,403 --> 00:17:02,907
It's called Schitt's Creek.
381
00:17:04,344 --> 00:17:05,798
And it's where we live.
382
00:17:18,617 --> 00:17:20,521
So Jake, um...
383
00:17:20,556 --> 00:17:22,856
Do you drink red wine, or white wine?
384
00:17:22,892 --> 00:17:24,273
I don't really drink wine.
385
00:17:24,719 --> 00:17:26,055
I'm more of a beer guy.
386
00:17:26,079 --> 00:17:27,547
Right. Yeah.
387
00:17:27,638 --> 00:17:29,906
That doesn't help me much. Um...
388
00:17:29,971 --> 00:17:32,339
Well, I better get going.
389
00:17:32,476 --> 00:17:34,810
I've gotta get to the shop
early tomorrow morning, so.
390
00:17:34,836 --> 00:17:36,609
Oh, you work retail as well?
391
00:17:37,059 --> 00:17:40,462
No, no. The wood shop. I make furniture.
392
00:17:40,488 --> 00:17:43,070
Ah. Yeah. No, I did a lot of um...
393
00:17:43,517 --> 00:17:45,049
I did a lot of wood
working in high school.
394
00:17:45,075 --> 00:17:46,624
- Oh.
- Yeah, uh,
395
00:17:46,648 --> 00:17:48,650
Christie McFadden
accidentally nailed her hand
396
00:17:48,683 --> 00:17:50,298
to her paper towel holder,
397
00:17:50,323 --> 00:17:53,414
so that's-the lesson is
just not to nail stuff...
398
00:17:58,227 --> 00:18:00,203
You know, I'm a pretty open-minded guy.
399
00:18:00,582 --> 00:18:03,500
So... why don't you stop
by the shop sometime?
400
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:05,555
Okay.
401
00:18:05,766 --> 00:18:08,376
- Good night.
- Good night.
402
00:18:13,075 --> 00:18:15,210
I knew it!
403
00:18:24,817 --> 00:18:26,016
Uh...
404
00:18:27,222 --> 00:18:29,359
Where were you?
405
00:18:29,906 --> 00:18:31,492
Where were you?!
406
00:18:32,119 --> 00:18:34,087
Some townies were trying to get us high,
407
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:36,213
and we didn't want to offend them,
408
00:18:36,239 --> 00:18:38,640
because they're doing so well in life.
409
00:18:38,977 --> 00:18:40,766
Didn't want to burn a bridge.
410
00:18:41,883 --> 00:18:44,939
Actually, those boys did
burn a bridge last summer.
411
00:18:44,973 --> 00:18:47,469
Luckily they don't get
as bored as they used to.
412
00:18:47,724 --> 00:18:49,592
Okay. Um...
413
00:18:49,775 --> 00:18:53,070
So Jake... is into me.
414
00:18:53,816 --> 00:18:54,923
Is he?
415
00:18:55,871 --> 00:18:58,798
- Yeah!
- What makes you think that?
416
00:18:58,823 --> 00:19:02,516
Because we just necked
out behind the barn.
417
00:19:03,734 --> 00:19:07,328
Seriously, what makes you think that?
418
00:19:09,064 --> 00:19:11,398
Because we put our mouths together,
419
00:19:11,634 --> 00:19:13,414
out behind the barn.
420
00:19:14,135 --> 00:19:17,171
Just so you know, I kissed him too.
421
00:19:19,595 --> 00:19:20,945
Well, that didn't happen.
422
00:19:21,607 --> 00:19:23,180
Who's to say?
423
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,570
Well, when would you
have had time to do that?
424
00:19:28,232 --> 00:19:30,434
Did he invite you to his wood shop?
425
00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:32,126
Sorry, that came out wrong.
426
00:19:43,526 --> 00:19:45,993
Smells like grass in here.
427
00:19:46,355 --> 00:19:50,192
- Oh my God!
- Oh my God!
428
00:19:52,229 --> 00:19:54,730
Okay, this is not okay! What
are you guys doing here?!
429
00:19:54,765 --> 00:19:57,209
Shhh, Alexis!
430
00:19:57,233 --> 00:19:59,776
For once in your life Shhhh!
431
00:20:00,136 --> 00:20:02,904
I don't care what snarky
remarks you kids are gonna make
432
00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:06,776
under your breath, tonight
we are dancing as a family.
433
00:20:06,809 --> 00:20:08,479
What is happening?
434
00:20:15,376 --> 00:20:17,353
Do you know your father and I
435
00:20:17,386 --> 00:20:20,501
hold great affection for the two of you?
436
00:20:21,124 --> 00:20:23,226
It may not always be obvious, but...
437
00:20:23,259 --> 00:20:25,096
Just say it, Moira!
438
00:20:25,654 --> 00:20:28,323
We love you both very much.
439
00:20:28,568 --> 00:20:30,518
Love you too!
440
00:20:34,337 --> 00:20:35,872
Love you too.
441
00:21:15,260 --> 00:21:19,685
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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