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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:29,700 --> 00:00:32,060 - Am I alive? - No. 2 00:00:34,780 --> 00:00:36,500 - Am I a man? - Yes. 3 00:00:39,580 --> 00:00:41,420 - Am I fictional? - No. 4 00:00:45,180 --> 00:00:46,380 Am I Dan? 5 00:00:49,460 --> 00:00:50,340 Do you think? 6 00:00:50,340 --> 00:00:53,980 ♪ I pull some streams of smoke Down into my lungs ♪ 7 00:00:54,060 --> 00:00:59,340 ♪ Young face in alcohol flames I was dead on arrival ♪ 8 00:01:01,460 --> 00:01:04,860 ♪ I wish I had your voice At the end of the line ♪ 9 00:01:04,860 --> 00:01:08,940 ♪ I'm a postcard waiting In a forgotten time ♪ 10 00:01:09,340 --> 00:01:12,820 ♪ I shiver on the floor Of broken glass ♪ 11 00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:15,420 ♪ I was dead on arrival ♪ 12 00:01:17,300 --> 00:01:20,380 ♪ Took off my shirt Kicked off my shoes ♪ 13 00:01:20,500 --> 00:01:24,420 ♪ I was twisting in the movie That I'd left for you ♪ 14 00:01:24,500 --> 00:01:28,380 ♪ I said, "Throw me a cigarette I was king of the world" ♪ 15 00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:30,860 ♪ But I was dead on arrival ♪ 16 00:01:33,060 --> 00:01:36,420 ♪ I'm blocking out the pain again ♪ 17 00:01:36,900 --> 00:01:40,300 ♪ Don't know how to start again ♪ 18 00:01:40,900 --> 00:01:45,740 ♪ Life on the road holds nothing But lost sleep ♪ 19 00:01:48,300 --> 00:01:51,580 ♪ When a woman can be alone ♪ 20 00:01:52,140 --> 00:01:55,420 ♪ With her weakness or sin ♪ 21 00:01:56,660 --> 00:02:01,980 ♪ How does she write the sickness Out of her heart? ♪ 22 00:02:02,580 --> 00:02:05,820 ♪ Hooked and sick Now we're dust and done ♪ 23 00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:09,820 ♪ So I said my goodbye, Good luck and so on ♪ 24 00:02:10,820 --> 00:02:13,620 ♪ Trembling hands I must be insane ♪ 25 00:02:13,740 --> 00:02:16,380 ♪ But I was dead on arrival ♪ 26 00:02:18,740 --> 00:02:21,500 ♪ I just don't know ♪ 27 00:02:22,420 --> 00:02:25,900 ♪ Where I can be found ♪ 28 00:02:26,460 --> 00:02:28,460 ♪ You don't remember ♪ 29 00:02:30,860 --> 00:02:32,940 ♪ You don't remember ♪ 30 00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:38,780 ♪ You said it's plain to see ♪ 31 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,940 ♪ I'm stuck on you ♪ 32 00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:46,060 ♪ You don't remember ♪ 33 00:02:47,780 --> 00:02:50,220 ♪ You don't remember ♪ 34 00:02:52,020 --> 00:02:54,500 ♪ You don't remember ♪ 35 00:02:55,860 --> 00:02:58,260 ♪ I was dead on arrival ♪ 36 00:02:58,740 --> 00:03:00,060 ♪ I just don't know... ♪ 37 00:03:00,060 --> 00:03:02,540 ♪ I was dead on arrival ♪ 38 00:03:02,620 --> 00:03:04,380 ♪ Where I can be found ♪ 39 00:03:04,380 --> 00:03:06,860 ♪ I was dead on arrival ♪ 40 00:03:11,020 --> 00:03:12,260 A bit literal. 41 00:03:19,820 --> 00:03:22,060 How many mini Scotch eggs is too many? 42 00:03:22,060 --> 00:03:24,620 - How many have we had? - Twenty. 43 00:03:24,620 --> 00:03:25,900 Maybe more. 44 00:03:26,140 --> 00:03:28,140 Yeah, that's too many. 45 00:03:30,500 --> 00:03:31,900 Come on. 46 00:03:32,340 --> 00:03:34,020 We should go back inside. 47 00:03:37,540 --> 00:03:39,060 It's only temporary. 48 00:03:39,060 --> 00:03:41,100 I do it in between acting jobs. 49 00:03:41,100 --> 00:03:46,020 Yeah. I mean, it's advertising so I guess that's always pretty well paid? 50 00:03:46,140 --> 00:03:48,460 And actually the skills do feed in. 51 00:03:49,100 --> 00:03:51,740 Yeah, I know. I'm... I'm really lucky. 52 00:03:51,940 --> 00:03:53,340 Improvisation. 53 00:03:54,020 --> 00:03:55,420 Mime. 54 00:03:55,500 --> 00:03:58,220 Oh, no, no. That wasn't one of our clients. 55 00:03:58,220 --> 00:04:01,580 To be honest, the thing I don't like about it is the name. 56 00:04:01,580 --> 00:04:02,980 Nanny. 57 00:04:03,260 --> 00:04:04,780 Stupid name for a job. 58 00:04:05,220 --> 00:04:07,300 I think hypocrisy is quite a strong word. 59 00:04:07,300 --> 00:04:08,460 Nanny... 60 00:04:08,860 --> 00:04:10,060 Nanny! 61 00:04:10,700 --> 00:04:13,220 I'm just gonna ask... Is this the day to be asking me this? 62 00:04:13,220 --> 00:04:14,380 Is this the day? 63 00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:18,060 His mum's made me read loads of books about cot death. 64 00:04:18,060 --> 00:04:19,660 All of death, actually. 65 00:04:19,820 --> 00:04:22,420 I mean, loads of ways that you can die... 66 00:04:22,420 --> 00:04:23,780 Loads. 67 00:04:25,380 --> 00:04:26,660 I hate people. 68 00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:30,660 Babe, did you tell Dan's cousin I was a homeopathist? 69 00:04:30,660 --> 00:04:31,860 No, I didn't. 70 00:04:32,700 --> 00:04:34,580 I said you were a homeopath. 71 00:04:34,580 --> 00:04:36,540 "Homeopathist" is not a word. 72 00:04:37,140 --> 00:04:38,420 What are you talking about? 73 00:04:38,420 --> 00:04:42,100 I don't tell people at first meet he works in the city. 74 00:04:42,220 --> 00:04:44,020 - People blame him for stuff. - Seph! 75 00:04:44,020 --> 00:04:45,420 I'm protecting him! 76 00:04:46,020 --> 00:04:48,500 I wish I'd lied about my own job, to be honest. 77 00:04:48,500 --> 00:04:51,460 I thought today was the one day I wouldn't feel like a failure. 78 00:04:51,460 --> 00:04:53,620 You know, compared to dying, I'm doing all right. 79 00:04:53,620 --> 00:04:55,020 - Seph! - What? 80 00:04:56,140 --> 00:05:00,900 Sorry, could you, for one second, not make this about your fucking self? 81 00:05:01,220 --> 00:05:02,380 The guy is dead. 82 00:05:07,260 --> 00:05:08,500 Should we go? 83 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:13,260 Just give me five minutes. 84 00:05:17,060 --> 00:05:18,100 Hey, it's Pandora. 85 00:05:18,100 --> 00:05:22,140 Sorry, I can't take your call. Leave a message and I'll ring you back. 86 00:05:22,140 --> 00:05:23,500 Hi, Pan. It's me. 87 00:05:24,940 --> 00:05:27,460 Alex... I'm so sorry to bother you. 88 00:05:28,260 --> 00:05:30,340 I know you're working all day. 89 00:05:31,780 --> 00:05:33,020 I just... 90 00:05:34,900 --> 00:05:38,820 I don't know... I just... I just really wish you were here. 91 00:05:38,820 --> 00:05:40,060 It's really hard. 92 00:05:40,060 --> 00:05:41,220 I'm... 93 00:05:42,500 --> 00:05:46,220 I'm sorry. I'm not gonna go. I know you can't be here. 94 00:05:46,220 --> 00:05:49,340 Anyway... Sorry. Of course, I'll lend you that money. 95 00:05:49,340 --> 00:05:51,740 I'm... I'm sorry I've been a twat. 96 00:05:52,220 --> 00:05:53,580 Anyway, I love you. 97 00:05:53,780 --> 00:05:55,140 I'll see you later. 98 00:06:02,380 --> 00:06:04,380 I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. 99 00:06:05,180 --> 00:06:06,580 It's okay. 100 00:06:07,780 --> 00:06:10,220 I'm not trying to make it about myself, but just... 101 00:06:10,220 --> 00:06:11,380 No, I know. 102 00:06:13,180 --> 00:06:14,580 I'm sorry. 103 00:06:27,900 --> 00:06:29,140 I love you, mouse. 104 00:06:31,580 --> 00:06:32,820 I love you, too. 105 00:06:37,460 --> 00:06:41,180 And you've gotta stop telling people you're a failure. 106 00:06:42,140 --> 00:06:44,660 It's not failure like normal failure. 107 00:06:44,980 --> 00:06:46,140 What? 108 00:06:47,060 --> 00:06:48,420 No, it's acting. 109 00:06:49,500 --> 00:06:51,300 It's a lottery, isn't it? 110 00:06:52,100 --> 00:06:53,860 It's like failure like... 111 00:06:54,100 --> 00:06:56,220 "Oh, I didn't win the lottery." 112 00:06:58,620 --> 00:07:00,540 You keep ploughing on, baba. 113 00:07:02,540 --> 00:07:03,820 So brave. 114 00:07:11,500 --> 00:07:13,940 - Are you sure that we could just... - What? 115 00:07:13,940 --> 00:07:16,060 We can't just leave. It's not allowed. 116 00:07:16,060 --> 00:07:17,780 No, no. Hang on a second. 117 00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:19,540 Wait there. Amelia! 118 00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:21,660 Darling. 119 00:07:22,140 --> 00:07:24,300 Sorry, we weren't sneaking out. 120 00:07:25,620 --> 00:07:27,500 We have to show you something. 121 00:07:27,500 --> 00:07:28,780 Henry. 122 00:07:29,220 --> 00:07:30,580 Come on. 123 00:07:33,220 --> 00:07:35,740 I've been calling this Dan's dongle. 124 00:07:43,180 --> 00:07:44,580 Right. 125 00:07:45,820 --> 00:07:48,060 Let's leave them to it, shall we? 126 00:07:48,420 --> 00:07:49,820 Darling? 127 00:07:56,820 --> 00:07:58,620 Go on. Open it. 128 00:08:14,380 --> 00:08:16,740 Is that... Is that my bathroom? 129 00:08:16,860 --> 00:08:20,580 Seph. Okay, so... I'm gonna die. 130 00:08:20,940 --> 00:08:24,500 Yeah. And you have no idea... 131 00:08:24,900 --> 00:08:28,860 I start fucking chemotherapy tomorrow. 132 00:08:29,140 --> 00:08:32,020 I mean, it's just... It's just palliative. 133 00:08:32,540 --> 00:08:36,860 The doctors took great pains to explain that it's not gonna save my life. 134 00:08:36,860 --> 00:08:38,100 Thank you, David. 135 00:08:38,740 --> 00:08:42,700 Yeah. You know it's serious when they say, "Call me David." 136 00:08:44,620 --> 00:08:45,780 Okay. Right. 137 00:08:47,140 --> 00:08:50,380 Yeah, I... I don't know when you're watching this. 138 00:08:50,380 --> 00:08:52,500 How long I've been, you know... 139 00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:54,780 haloed. 140 00:08:55,420 --> 00:08:57,180 But... I love you. 141 00:08:57,380 --> 00:08:58,860 I love you both a lot. 142 00:08:59,180 --> 00:09:03,580 And I am sorry that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm ill... 143 00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:05,620 but I'm not! 144 00:09:06,260 --> 00:09:09,260 I reckon one day... One day you'll get it. 145 00:09:09,700 --> 00:09:11,180 Or not. I don't know. 146 00:09:11,540 --> 00:09:13,020 Anyway, I've had a fucking... 147 00:09:13,020 --> 00:09:16,260 I've had a fucking brilliant idea just now. 148 00:09:16,620 --> 00:09:17,860 I'm gonna give you... 149 00:09:17,860 --> 00:09:21,460 I bequeath you... 150 00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:24,060 my ashes. 151 00:09:26,060 --> 00:09:27,700 What? 152 00:09:27,860 --> 00:09:28,740 What? 153 00:09:28,740 --> 00:09:32,700 Yeah. I've told my missus what I want and she's not happy about it. 154 00:09:32,700 --> 00:09:34,100 But fuck it! 155 00:09:34,540 --> 00:09:38,340 Mom, if you are watching this, you fucking shouldn't be. 156 00:09:38,420 --> 00:09:39,660 I told you-- 157 00:09:39,740 --> 00:09:41,500 Amelia, I'm really sorry. 158 00:09:43,020 --> 00:09:45,780 You know, I didn't realize he hated me... 159 00:09:46,100 --> 00:09:47,740 that he really hated me. 160 00:09:48,060 --> 00:09:49,300 But he does. 161 00:09:50,260 --> 00:09:51,420 Did. 162 00:09:52,300 --> 00:09:53,460 He really did. 163 00:09:54,340 --> 00:09:56,780 - Of course he didn't-- - No, he did! 164 00:09:57,740 --> 00:09:59,140 You'll see. 165 00:10:07,580 --> 00:10:09,700 What the fuck is wrong with him? 166 00:10:10,060 --> 00:10:11,620 Well, you know... 167 00:10:12,900 --> 00:10:14,300 probably the cancer. 168 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:21,900 - I told you-- - Dan! 169 00:10:21,900 --> 00:10:24,180 Dan, I think I'm actually gonna wet myself! 170 00:10:24,180 --> 00:10:25,620 All right, all right! 171 00:10:27,540 --> 00:10:28,820 Awkward time jump. 172 00:10:29,540 --> 00:10:31,740 Ruined it for yourself there, Al. 173 00:10:35,780 --> 00:10:37,060 Okay, so... 174 00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:41,260 There are four places I wanna go back to. 175 00:10:41,900 --> 00:10:46,620 And I want you to scatter a bit of me in each one. 176 00:10:48,980 --> 00:10:50,260 There's a list of the places-- 177 00:10:50,260 --> 00:10:54,940 I've written down the exact post codes, for your sat-nav or whatever. 178 00:10:54,940 --> 00:10:58,900 And so you just take a laptop and a USB stick... 179 00:10:59,100 --> 00:11:02,140 and I've made a video for each place... 180 00:11:02,540 --> 00:11:05,620 so it will sort of be like I'm really there. 181 00:11:07,180 --> 00:11:09,380 Oh, and Henry's agreed to lend you the car. 182 00:11:09,380 --> 00:11:11,580 I asked him this afternoon, so... 183 00:11:11,580 --> 00:11:12,940 Sorted. 184 00:11:13,700 --> 00:11:15,220 Road trip! 185 00:11:18,220 --> 00:11:20,140 Yeah, essentially this is... 186 00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:24,860 Thelma & Louise plus Casper the Friendly Ghost. 187 00:11:26,140 --> 00:11:27,740 You are welcome. 188 00:11:39,180 --> 00:11:40,940 What the fuck's going on? 189 00:11:44,540 --> 00:11:46,300 It belonged to his dad, this car. 190 00:11:46,300 --> 00:11:47,460 Ancient. 191 00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:49,980 And that's... 192 00:11:51,780 --> 00:11:54,740 where he wanted to be stored on the journey. 193 00:11:56,900 --> 00:11:58,180 He put some thought into it. 194 00:11:58,180 --> 00:11:59,780 Right. Fuck, sorry. 195 00:12:00,180 --> 00:12:02,540 Please, fuck away. I do understand. 196 00:12:05,300 --> 00:12:06,500 And this... 197 00:12:07,580 --> 00:12:10,780 seemed like a more practical receptacle. 198 00:12:15,940 --> 00:12:18,180 I thought you had to wait a bit... 199 00:12:18,300 --> 00:12:19,620 for ashes. 200 00:12:19,620 --> 00:12:21,300 I play squash with Colin. 201 00:12:23,020 --> 00:12:24,900 - Man from the crem. - Right. 202 00:12:25,180 --> 00:12:26,540 Nice guy. 203 00:12:34,500 --> 00:12:35,820 I don't think we should do it. 204 00:12:35,820 --> 00:12:37,420 - What? - Take it a week... a couple... 205 00:12:37,420 --> 00:12:39,780 I... I don't know. And just take him back to them. 206 00:12:39,780 --> 00:12:41,020 But it's what he wanted. 207 00:12:41,020 --> 00:12:44,100 It doesn't matter. It's fucked up. It's really fucked up. 208 00:12:44,100 --> 00:12:45,300 Even for Dan. 209 00:12:46,940 --> 00:12:48,060 I'll call you tomorrow. 210 00:12:48,060 --> 00:12:50,940 - Al, could we talk about this? - Oh, please. 211 00:12:50,980 --> 00:12:53,460 Pandora, turn that fucking radio off. 212 00:12:53,740 --> 00:12:54,980 Oh, my God! 213 00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:04,540 Is that Pandora? 214 00:13:05,220 --> 00:13:07,340 Obviously, you know each other. 215 00:13:08,300 --> 00:13:09,660 But... 216 00:13:10,580 --> 00:13:12,980 I have literally no idea who that is. 217 00:13:12,980 --> 00:13:14,180 Rachel. 218 00:13:14,220 --> 00:13:15,420 Rachel? Right. 219 00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:16,860 - Alex-- - Oh, my God. 220 00:13:18,180 --> 00:13:19,620 Our friend just died. 221 00:13:19,940 --> 00:13:22,220 Her friend... just died. 222 00:13:22,460 --> 00:13:25,020 Your girlfriend's friend just died. 223 00:13:25,020 --> 00:13:27,100 Who refuses to go to a funeral? 224 00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:30,060 Who refuses because they'd rather be doing... 225 00:13:30,060 --> 00:13:31,740 I mean, what the fuck is wrong with you? 226 00:13:31,740 --> 00:13:34,940 Okay, I think this is between me and Alex. Alex? 227 00:13:35,700 --> 00:13:36,780 Oh, my God, Alex! 228 00:13:36,780 --> 00:13:39,420 I will cut you, Pandora. I swear to God. 229 00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,300 You were right. 230 00:13:45,100 --> 00:13:47,180 Twenty Scotch eggs is too many. 231 00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:50,820 Jesus Christ. What a day! 232 00:13:50,820 --> 00:13:52,020 I'm gonna kill her. 233 00:13:52,020 --> 00:13:53,180 Seriously. 234 00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:55,740 I'm gonna go round there tomorrow and I'm gonna skin her alive 235 00:13:55,740 --> 00:13:57,620 and wear her as a coat to a fucking party. 236 00:13:57,620 --> 00:13:59,300 - Seph! - Dan would want to stick with her. 237 00:13:59,300 --> 00:14:01,100 He would! He'd probably come back and help. 238 00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:02,700 Just calm down. 239 00:14:08,700 --> 00:14:10,100 Al... 240 00:14:13,460 --> 00:14:14,820 Al. 241 00:14:15,900 --> 00:14:19,060 - Alex-- - Can I please not talk about it? 242 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:34,100 All right. Good night. 243 00:14:34,700 --> 00:14:36,100 Night. 244 00:14:37,220 --> 00:14:38,380 Are you okay? 245 00:14:38,660 --> 00:14:40,140 - What? - I just... 246 00:14:41,300 --> 00:14:42,700 Nothing. 247 00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:44,660 Sleep well. 248 00:14:44,900 --> 00:14:46,180 You too. 249 00:14:46,180 --> 00:14:47,580 I'll just be in there... 250 00:14:47,580 --> 00:14:48,820 Obviously. 251 00:14:48,820 --> 00:14:50,220 See you. 252 00:14:50,820 --> 00:14:52,180 Okay. 253 00:15:47,860 --> 00:15:49,020 Al? 254 00:15:50,420 --> 00:15:51,780 Tea. 255 00:16:04,740 --> 00:16:06,020 I love you. 256 00:16:07,780 --> 00:16:08,980 I can't breathe. 257 00:16:11,780 --> 00:16:15,780 Yogurt is so in trend right now. You got FroYo... I grow my own yogurt. 258 00:16:15,780 --> 00:16:18,100 - What? Bacteria? - Yeah. Bacteria. 259 00:16:18,300 --> 00:16:21,380 Anyway, Alex is gonna tell you about the copy. 260 00:16:23,580 --> 00:16:24,740 Alex? 261 00:16:26,940 --> 00:16:28,340 Alex... 262 00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:30,340 - Alex... - My ashes! 263 00:16:30,980 --> 00:16:32,220 - Alex. - Yes! 264 00:16:32,620 --> 00:16:34,020 Sorry. 265 00:16:34,260 --> 00:16:35,660 Yogurt. 266 00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:51,460 But, Madan, this is what I'm saying... I don't think you are depressed. 267 00:16:51,460 --> 00:16:53,820 - Well... I... - If you'll let me finish, please. 268 00:16:53,820 --> 00:16:56,140 - Sorry. - I think you are lonely... 269 00:16:56,340 --> 00:16:58,100 and a little bit tired. 270 00:16:59,940 --> 00:17:03,100 Madan, I've just seen the clock. I'm afraid we're out of time. 271 00:17:03,100 --> 00:17:05,580 But if you just let what I've said... 272 00:17:06,260 --> 00:17:07,620 marinate. 273 00:17:07,700 --> 00:17:09,140 - Okay? And... - Okay. 274 00:17:09,780 --> 00:17:11,860 keep filling out the mood-sheets. 275 00:17:11,860 --> 00:17:13,140 Namaste. 276 00:17:14,780 --> 00:17:16,020 Divorce. 277 00:17:16,020 --> 00:17:18,180 I don't think he's very bright. 278 00:17:18,420 --> 00:17:19,820 He's... 279 00:17:22,540 --> 00:17:23,780 Into REM? 280 00:17:23,780 --> 00:17:24,940 Lovely. 281 00:17:25,620 --> 00:17:26,820 Coffee? 282 00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:28,420 Yeah. Thank you. 283 00:17:28,500 --> 00:17:31,460 Decaf for me. Madan's left me slightly wired. 284 00:17:31,460 --> 00:17:32,620 Sure. 285 00:17:35,260 --> 00:17:36,420 Oh, talk to me. 286 00:17:36,540 --> 00:17:38,940 - What? - Your friends. Your dead friends? 287 00:17:38,940 --> 00:17:40,300 Oh! 288 00:17:41,500 --> 00:17:42,860 Oh, you need to talk about it. 289 00:17:42,860 --> 00:17:44,580 - You must talk about it. - Yeah. 290 00:17:44,580 --> 00:17:48,940 Words are a paddle. They're like a rudder through pain, you know? 291 00:17:49,060 --> 00:17:50,180 Am I making any sense? 292 00:17:50,180 --> 00:17:51,420 Yeah, I think so. 293 00:17:52,660 --> 00:17:54,300 Don't think of me as your boss. 294 00:17:54,300 --> 00:17:55,500 Thanks. 295 00:17:55,500 --> 00:17:58,140 - Don't think of me as James' boss's wife. - No. 296 00:17:58,140 --> 00:18:00,660 No, I'm... I'm a human being, just like you... 297 00:18:00,660 --> 00:18:02,140 and I'm here for you. 298 00:18:02,180 --> 00:18:04,180 Anything you want, anything at all. 299 00:18:04,180 --> 00:18:06,020 You're in the right place, actually. 300 00:18:06,020 --> 00:18:07,220 I totally get it. 301 00:18:08,900 --> 00:18:10,380 Well, actually I was-- 302 00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:12,900 Are there any Jaffa Cakes, by the way? 303 00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:14,660 - No-- - Fuck! 304 00:18:15,380 --> 00:18:16,500 Sorry. I don't need them. 305 00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:17,380 I don't need them. 306 00:18:17,380 --> 00:18:20,460 It's Pavlov's dogs, actually. It's the smell of the coffee. 307 00:18:20,460 --> 00:18:21,620 Sorry. 308 00:18:22,340 --> 00:18:23,500 Carry on. 309 00:18:24,980 --> 00:18:26,260 Well... 310 00:18:26,260 --> 00:18:30,020 Actually, I was gonna ask you if I could take a week off. 311 00:18:34,540 --> 00:18:35,780 What? 312 00:18:35,780 --> 00:18:37,700 I mean, it's simple, it's minimalist. 313 00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:41,220 This generation YouTube, and have no attention span. 314 00:18:44,820 --> 00:18:46,900 At the end of the day, it's yogurt. 315 00:18:46,900 --> 00:18:49,460 It's not, I don't know... atomic fusion, is it? 316 00:18:49,460 --> 00:18:51,460 Does Johannes mean nothing to you? 317 00:18:51,460 --> 00:18:53,300 - What? No-- - He's a baby. 318 00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:57,940 You are proposing leaving a baby on his own for a week. 319 00:18:57,980 --> 00:18:59,900 - Well, to be fair-- - A week! 320 00:18:59,940 --> 00:19:02,340 What's that thing that Bono did, when he clicked his fingers? 321 00:19:02,340 --> 00:19:03,460 Yeah, a child dies. 322 00:19:03,460 --> 00:19:06,460 Every time I do that is the time it takes for someone to eat yogurt. 323 00:19:06,460 --> 00:19:07,740 Fifteen dead kids. 324 00:19:07,940 --> 00:19:10,460 At least, because some people eat slowly. 325 00:19:10,460 --> 00:19:12,420 This is actually classic, Seph. This is textbook. 326 00:19:12,420 --> 00:19:15,540 I gotta tell you that your friend is dead. There's nothing you can do about it. 327 00:19:15,540 --> 00:19:17,340 It's a truth that we never want to acknowledge 328 00:19:17,340 --> 00:19:20,220 that there is a skull at the banquet, there is a worm at the core... 329 00:19:20,220 --> 00:19:21,980 Death is the final answer. 330 00:19:29,740 --> 00:19:31,020 I've just been fired. 331 00:19:31,020 --> 00:19:32,420 Let's do it. 332 00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:34,820 Let's scatter Dan. 333 00:19:46,820 --> 00:19:48,780 - She really said that? - Yeah. 334 00:19:48,780 --> 00:19:49,740 Fuck. Wow. 335 00:19:49,740 --> 00:19:52,140 She didn't actually fire me until I pointed out 336 00:19:52,140 --> 00:19:54,660 that she's there, you know, all the time, 337 00:19:54,660 --> 00:19:58,300 and I am, therefore, somewhat surplus to requirements. 338 00:19:58,340 --> 00:20:00,220 - You know what she bought the other day? - What? 339 00:20:00,220 --> 00:20:02,100 - An almond milker. - What? 340 00:20:02,180 --> 00:20:03,380 I shit you not. 341 00:20:03,580 --> 00:20:04,660 She was shouting at me, 342 00:20:04,660 --> 00:20:06,900 telling me I had no sense of responsibility, 343 00:20:06,900 --> 00:20:09,700 and I had this beautiful moment of clarity. 344 00:20:09,700 --> 00:20:12,420 I thought, "This woman milks nuts. 345 00:20:12,860 --> 00:20:14,020 She milks them. 346 00:20:14,980 --> 00:20:16,420 I mean, what am I doing? 347 00:20:16,420 --> 00:20:18,420 What am I doing with my life?" 348 00:20:19,740 --> 00:20:21,460 So I told her to go fuck herself. 349 00:20:21,460 --> 00:20:23,660 - Very strong choice. - Thank you. 350 00:20:25,820 --> 00:20:27,860 Were your lot not sympathetic? 351 00:20:28,100 --> 00:20:29,420 What? 352 00:20:29,420 --> 00:20:32,580 - About the funeral. - Yeah, I didn't tell them. 353 00:20:36,220 --> 00:20:37,620 What? 354 00:20:37,940 --> 00:20:39,340 Nothing. 355 00:20:40,700 --> 00:20:42,260 I don't know. We just decided. 356 00:20:42,260 --> 00:20:43,140 Thank you. 357 00:20:43,140 --> 00:20:44,540 What? 358 00:20:44,620 --> 00:20:45,980 No, not a whim. 359 00:20:46,900 --> 00:20:48,300 Oh, for God's sake! 360 00:20:48,300 --> 00:20:49,620 We're driving across Britain. 361 00:20:49,620 --> 00:20:51,300 It's not fucking Mexico! 362 00:20:52,780 --> 00:20:54,980 I... I don't give a shit what you say, James. 363 00:20:54,980 --> 00:20:56,220 I really don't. 364 00:20:56,620 --> 00:20:58,300 But I'm not sorry, am I? 365 00:21:00,700 --> 00:21:03,820 Oh, for God's sake! Look, I... I don't expect you to understand it. 366 00:21:03,820 --> 00:21:05,940 Okay? Because you never liked him. 367 00:21:05,940 --> 00:21:07,340 Did you? 368 00:21:07,740 --> 00:21:09,140 You... I... I'll... 369 00:21:09,740 --> 00:21:11,740 I'll call you tomorrow... possibly. 370 00:21:11,740 --> 00:21:12,940 Bye. 371 00:21:13,460 --> 00:21:14,620 Dickhead! 372 00:21:19,380 --> 00:21:21,340 How's that working out for you? 373 00:21:21,340 --> 00:21:22,540 Delicious. 374 00:21:26,100 --> 00:21:28,900 I still can't believe Dan didn't tell us. 375 00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:30,660 I can. 376 00:21:31,420 --> 00:21:35,340 'Cause then you can just sort of get on with it, can't you? 377 00:21:35,780 --> 00:21:38,140 Oh, my God, that's what you'd do, isn't it? 378 00:21:38,140 --> 00:21:39,340 Yeah, probably. 379 00:21:52,540 --> 00:21:53,860 Have you spoken to her yet? 380 00:21:53,860 --> 00:21:55,220 Nope. 381 00:21:55,380 --> 00:21:56,620 - Not at all? - No. 382 00:21:58,580 --> 00:22:00,820 - You will have to, you know? - No. 383 00:22:02,060 --> 00:22:04,260 I mean, what about all your stuff? 384 00:22:04,260 --> 00:22:05,500 It's just stuff. 385 00:22:05,700 --> 00:22:08,820 Went out and bought more clothes this morning. 386 00:22:09,580 --> 00:22:12,420 I mean, what about your laptop and your passport? 387 00:22:12,420 --> 00:22:14,060 She's literally got all your stuff, Al. 388 00:22:14,060 --> 00:22:15,420 Look, it's just stuff. 389 00:22:15,420 --> 00:22:16,980 Seriously, I don't care. 390 00:22:16,980 --> 00:22:18,340 If there'd been a fire... Right? 391 00:22:18,340 --> 00:22:20,140 If there'd been a massive fire in the flat... 392 00:22:20,140 --> 00:22:21,620 then I'd have lost it all anyway. 393 00:22:21,620 --> 00:22:23,660 So that's what it's like. That's how I'm seeing it. 394 00:22:23,660 --> 00:22:26,700 There was a massive fire or bomb and all my stuff was lost... 395 00:22:26,700 --> 00:22:27,860 and she died. 396 00:22:30,820 --> 00:22:33,660 I mean, yes, the literal facts are that she's not dead... 397 00:22:33,660 --> 00:22:35,820 and that she's got all my stuff. 398 00:22:36,100 --> 00:22:38,020 But it's how you look at it. 399 00:22:46,660 --> 00:22:49,740 So, rather excitingly, we seem to have got beyond Wirral, 400 00:22:49,740 --> 00:22:51,900 and are now in the middle of bum fat nowhere! 401 00:22:51,900 --> 00:22:53,860 Where possible, do a U-turn. 402 00:22:54,460 --> 00:22:55,860 Do a U-turn. 403 00:22:57,060 --> 00:22:58,220 Maybe just do a U-turn-- 404 00:22:58,220 --> 00:23:00,100 Just shut up! It'll come back in a minute. 405 00:23:00,100 --> 00:23:03,140 Look, we are here, okay? Glastonbury is here. 406 00:23:03,300 --> 00:23:06,460 We are driving in the opposite fucking direction. 407 00:23:06,460 --> 00:23:08,060 - You sure? - Yes! I'm-- 408 00:23:08,540 --> 00:23:10,620 Hang on. Are you holding it the wrong way around? 409 00:23:10,620 --> 00:23:14,580 Please, just get in the car before I punch you in the mouth. 410 00:23:19,620 --> 00:23:20,980 Okay. 411 00:23:24,100 --> 00:23:25,380 Oh, hello! 412 00:23:26,260 --> 00:23:28,180 Ah, Glastonbury Abbey. 413 00:23:28,580 --> 00:23:30,500 Beautiful. Always wanted to come back here. 414 00:23:30,500 --> 00:23:33,500 Could you just turn me around so I can see it? 415 00:23:33,500 --> 00:23:35,380 Oh, it's beautiful. 416 00:23:36,380 --> 00:23:38,460 Yeah, you can turn me back now. 417 00:23:42,060 --> 00:23:46,780 Okay, so... I came here once, when I was a toddler, with Dad. 418 00:23:46,860 --> 00:23:48,500 It was his favorite place. 419 00:23:48,500 --> 00:23:50,620 And apparently, I took down my pants 420 00:23:50,620 --> 00:23:53,620 and peed against one of the ruins like a dog. 421 00:23:54,940 --> 00:23:56,220 Cocked my leg. 422 00:23:57,220 --> 00:23:58,540 Very embarrassing. 423 00:23:59,860 --> 00:24:03,740 Anyway, this place is meant to be, you know, important. 424 00:24:04,420 --> 00:24:07,420 King Arthur's buried here, supposedly. It's pretty glam. 425 00:24:07,420 --> 00:24:11,340 And three unnamed Saxon kings. Less glam, sure, but... 426 00:24:11,940 --> 00:24:13,340 Dad loved it. 427 00:24:13,380 --> 00:24:15,940 Came here all the time when he was at university. 428 00:24:15,940 --> 00:24:17,140 "Spiritual." 429 00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:19,460 That's what he said... Spiritual. 430 00:24:19,460 --> 00:24:22,700 And, yeah, he wasn't, you know, like that. 431 00:24:23,220 --> 00:24:24,460 So... 432 00:24:24,780 --> 00:24:25,980 I believed him... 433 00:24:26,500 --> 00:24:27,860 more. 434 00:24:29,340 --> 00:24:31,100 Yeah. I mean, I don't know about that stuff. 435 00:24:31,100 --> 00:24:33,580 But I don't want it to be that all I could say about the place 436 00:24:33,580 --> 00:24:35,740 is that I once took a piss on it. 437 00:24:36,180 --> 00:24:37,660 And Dad wanted to be cremated... 438 00:24:37,660 --> 00:24:38,620 scattered here. 439 00:24:38,620 --> 00:24:40,380 But no one listened to him. They buried him. 440 00:24:40,380 --> 00:24:41,460 Did I ever tell you that? 441 00:24:41,460 --> 00:24:43,100 His fucking sister! 442 00:24:43,220 --> 00:24:45,620 Yeah! Good one, Mandy! 443 00:24:46,140 --> 00:24:47,540 Twat. 444 00:24:50,620 --> 00:24:52,020 So... 445 00:24:52,780 --> 00:24:55,460 I want a bit of me here. 446 00:24:56,980 --> 00:24:59,460 'Cause a bit of me means a bit of him. 447 00:25:08,820 --> 00:25:11,420 Well, someone made you a lovely dinner. 448 00:25:15,180 --> 00:25:16,940 And Al... Fuck. 449 00:25:17,140 --> 00:25:21,700 Al has been talked into lending Pandora 500 quid. 450 00:25:24,260 --> 00:25:26,660 Yeah, I think you should probably dump her, mate. 451 00:25:26,660 --> 00:25:28,060 Life is too short... 452 00:25:28,100 --> 00:25:29,460 even if you're not me. 453 00:25:29,460 --> 00:25:31,860 It's fucking nothing. It just goes. 454 00:25:32,260 --> 00:25:34,740 We waste so much time... 455 00:25:35,740 --> 00:25:38,660 and look, I know you. I know that neither of you are very happy. 456 00:25:38,660 --> 00:25:39,700 Not really. 457 00:25:39,700 --> 00:25:40,940 Not at the moment. 458 00:25:41,020 --> 00:25:43,700 So, look, this trip is not just about me. 459 00:25:43,900 --> 00:25:45,980 I want you both to have time... 460 00:25:46,420 --> 00:25:48,940 to get some space, to just work out... 461 00:25:49,780 --> 00:25:53,820 I don't know, just work out some stuff, whatever that means. 462 00:25:54,100 --> 00:25:56,180 I mean, I can help you, because... 463 00:25:56,180 --> 00:25:58,780 Well, you have to listen to me. You can't ignore me because... 464 00:25:58,780 --> 00:26:00,020 I'm dying. 465 00:26:01,020 --> 00:26:02,420 I'm dead. 466 00:26:03,100 --> 00:26:04,460 Ha... 467 00:26:07,180 --> 00:26:08,380 Yeah, I'm dead. 468 00:26:13,900 --> 00:26:16,020 Yeah, and I'm telling you, this is the worst thing... 469 00:26:16,020 --> 00:26:17,900 Feeling like you haven't made the most 470 00:26:17,900 --> 00:26:21,140 of every tiny little second you've breathed. 471 00:26:29,980 --> 00:26:31,140 Okay, so... 472 00:26:34,060 --> 00:26:35,220 This... 473 00:26:36,220 --> 00:26:37,580 is for you two. 474 00:26:38,700 --> 00:26:40,740 This is appropriate because... 475 00:26:41,700 --> 00:26:42,900 it's Kerouac. 476 00:26:43,300 --> 00:26:47,780 Though you'll probably be frequenting more Little Chefs than he did. 477 00:26:47,780 --> 00:26:50,460 "The only people for me are the mad ones. 478 00:26:51,660 --> 00:26:53,580 The ones who are mad to live, 479 00:26:53,660 --> 00:26:54,900 mad to talk, 480 00:26:54,900 --> 00:26:56,180 mad to be saved, 481 00:26:56,580 --> 00:26:59,500 desirous of everything at the same time. 482 00:27:00,100 --> 00:27:01,740 The ones who never yawn... 483 00:27:01,740 --> 00:27:03,700 or say a commonplace thing, 484 00:27:03,820 --> 00:27:06,860 but burn, burn, burn... 485 00:27:07,340 --> 00:27:10,700 like fabulous yellow Roman candles... 486 00:27:11,260 --> 00:27:14,820 exploding like spiders across the stars." 487 00:27:16,700 --> 00:27:18,020 What? 488 00:27:18,020 --> 00:27:20,020 Not allowed. We've never allowed scattering. 489 00:27:20,020 --> 00:27:21,260 No way, Jose. 490 00:27:21,820 --> 00:27:23,900 But why? I mean, it's just ash. 491 00:27:23,900 --> 00:27:25,100 He's just ash. 492 00:27:25,180 --> 00:27:26,620 Let me stop you right there. 493 00:27:26,620 --> 00:27:27,900 It's not just ash. 494 00:27:27,900 --> 00:27:30,980 That contains human bones and other parts of a human. 495 00:27:30,980 --> 00:27:33,860 We're a significant archaeological site... 496 00:27:34,180 --> 00:27:35,740 and we've got badgers. 497 00:27:38,260 --> 00:27:39,580 What? 498 00:27:39,580 --> 00:27:41,500 I can give you a guided tour. 499 00:27:41,900 --> 00:27:43,140 Okay. 500 00:27:43,140 --> 00:27:44,500 Six pounds each. 501 00:27:45,900 --> 00:27:47,780 I won't charge you for him. 502 00:27:52,900 --> 00:27:55,860 And you'll notice that a lot of these tombs are quite small 503 00:27:55,860 --> 00:27:58,700 because people in Medieval times were very short. 504 00:27:58,700 --> 00:27:59,780 Their stature... 505 00:27:59,780 --> 00:28:02,500 But I don't believe King Arthur would have been short of stature. 506 00:28:02,500 --> 00:28:04,340 I think he would have been a strapping man. 507 00:28:04,340 --> 00:28:07,420 Handsome, with flowing hair... probably quite muscular. 508 00:28:07,420 --> 00:28:11,340 Of course, his wife, Guinevere, cheated on him... 509 00:28:11,580 --> 00:28:13,940 with a knight, Sir Lancelot. 510 00:28:14,700 --> 00:28:18,780 Because in those days, women could also be cheating, lying whores 511 00:28:18,780 --> 00:28:20,660 as they are now. 512 00:28:22,300 --> 00:28:23,660 This... 513 00:28:24,060 --> 00:28:27,380 Said to be the final resting place of King Arthur. 514 00:28:27,660 --> 00:28:29,060 Right, so it's all right for him? 515 00:28:29,060 --> 00:28:30,460 Different times. 516 00:28:30,740 --> 00:28:32,260 It's different times. 517 00:28:33,340 --> 00:28:34,660 It's better times. 518 00:28:39,060 --> 00:28:41,980 - Quickly, whilst her back's turned! - What? 519 00:28:42,220 --> 00:28:43,900 It's never fully turned. 520 00:28:46,500 --> 00:28:48,740 I can't believe we fucked up already. 521 00:28:48,740 --> 00:28:51,180 - It's the first place, and we can't do it! - Seph. 522 00:28:51,180 --> 00:28:53,220 I mean, you know that stuff would hurt his dad, Al. 523 00:28:53,220 --> 00:28:54,500 I mean, his poor dad. 524 00:28:54,500 --> 00:28:56,260 It's not our fault. Come on, Seph, it's... 525 00:28:56,260 --> 00:28:58,900 It's... You know, it's... the badgers. 526 00:29:04,460 --> 00:29:05,820 I might... 527 00:29:06,260 --> 00:29:07,420 have a solution. 528 00:29:17,780 --> 00:29:19,900 - Thank you so much. - Thank you. 529 00:29:20,660 --> 00:29:21,980 There he is. 530 00:29:23,780 --> 00:29:25,740 It's better this way, isn't it? 531 00:29:25,740 --> 00:29:29,940 Because he can stay here, and he won't be floating about all... 532 00:29:30,420 --> 00:29:31,580 loose. 533 00:29:32,380 --> 00:29:33,460 Yeah. 534 00:29:33,460 --> 00:29:35,180 He'll be between here and the gift shop. 535 00:29:35,180 --> 00:29:37,180 And I'll take him out at lunch times. 536 00:29:37,180 --> 00:29:38,100 Thank you. 537 00:29:38,100 --> 00:29:41,060 And on fag breaks, if I start smoking again. 538 00:29:41,060 --> 00:29:43,780 - I might do. Might... Might not. - Right. 539 00:29:46,380 --> 00:29:49,500 Don't worry. I won't use him as an ashtray. I... 540 00:29:49,500 --> 00:29:51,940 I'm gonna look after him. I promise. 541 00:29:54,860 --> 00:29:56,260 Sorry. 542 00:29:57,140 --> 00:29:58,300 It's okay. 543 00:29:58,820 --> 00:30:00,260 People are just so... 544 00:30:01,020 --> 00:30:02,780 weird and... kind. 545 00:30:02,980 --> 00:30:03,900 I know. I know. 546 00:30:03,900 --> 00:30:06,060 Take him outside at lunchtime... 547 00:30:06,660 --> 00:30:08,060 God! 548 00:30:09,940 --> 00:30:11,020 - Hi. - Jesus! 549 00:30:11,020 --> 00:30:14,420 Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I just heard... 550 00:30:16,060 --> 00:30:18,060 I just heard you... Heard sobbing. 551 00:30:18,060 --> 00:30:20,220 Sorry, I was just having a... 552 00:30:20,620 --> 00:30:21,860 Oh, yeah. Yeah. 553 00:30:22,020 --> 00:30:23,020 Here. 554 00:30:23,020 --> 00:30:24,620 Oh, my God. Thank you. 555 00:30:25,380 --> 00:30:27,340 They've got a protective balm. 556 00:30:27,340 --> 00:30:31,180 It's quite... It's quite soothing if you've got, you know, sensitive skin... 557 00:30:31,180 --> 00:30:32,580 or something. 558 00:30:32,740 --> 00:30:35,020 - I do have sensitive skin. - Yeah. 559 00:30:37,220 --> 00:30:39,180 What you girls doing tonight? 560 00:30:45,620 --> 00:30:47,100 I'm Adam, by the way. 561 00:30:47,220 --> 00:30:48,580 Hi, Adam. 562 00:30:50,020 --> 00:30:51,620 Hey, this is Seph's phone. 563 00:30:51,620 --> 00:30:54,180 Wait for the beep and then say something fascinating... 564 00:30:54,180 --> 00:30:56,380 or offer me money! Thanks. Bye. 565 00:30:58,780 --> 00:31:00,380 Hey, babe, it's me. 566 00:31:01,340 --> 00:31:03,940 Yeah, I'm sorry about earlier. I... I guess I was just worried. 567 00:31:03,940 --> 00:31:04,900 That's all. 568 00:31:04,900 --> 00:31:07,180 But you're right. I was being a dick. 569 00:31:07,180 --> 00:31:10,540 But the good part of it is I've got your job back. 570 00:31:11,140 --> 00:31:12,820 So, yeah, I just hope you don't mind that. 571 00:31:12,820 --> 00:31:16,700 I spoke to Tim and I just explained to him that, you know, it's been a bit of a... 572 00:31:16,700 --> 00:31:18,260 You know, you're not... 573 00:31:18,260 --> 00:31:21,140 Yeah. So, anyway, it's all fine. All's forgiven. 574 00:31:21,140 --> 00:31:23,260 So you don't need to sign on... 575 00:31:23,620 --> 00:31:24,860 or go on the game. 576 00:31:25,140 --> 00:31:27,220 Bad spot, either of those decisions. 577 00:31:27,220 --> 00:31:28,500 Obviously. 578 00:31:29,140 --> 00:31:31,020 Right. Okay. Love you. 579 00:31:31,140 --> 00:31:32,540 Bye. 580 00:31:35,140 --> 00:31:37,020 Yeah, it's just a small kind of gathering. 581 00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:38,020 Friends not foes. 582 00:31:38,020 --> 00:31:39,420 You don't have the foes in here. 583 00:31:39,420 --> 00:31:42,500 They can't dance, and they piss in the cider. 584 00:31:52,580 --> 00:31:54,900 How... How long are we going to be here for? 585 00:31:54,900 --> 00:31:57,340 - What? - An hour? Two hours? What? 586 00:31:57,580 --> 00:32:01,460 I don't know. Can't we just stay and see what happens? 587 00:32:01,540 --> 00:32:03,780 Yeah, okay. I'm just... I'm just checking. 588 00:32:03,780 --> 00:32:06,740 Look, you need to chill out, okay? Just relax. 589 00:32:06,740 --> 00:32:08,580 Use tonight to listen to yourself-- 590 00:32:08,580 --> 00:32:10,660 Right. I can take that shit from Dan. He is dead. 591 00:32:10,660 --> 00:32:11,620 You? No. 592 00:32:11,620 --> 00:32:14,700 Listen, Sparky. How about you interact with some new people 593 00:32:14,700 --> 00:32:16,260 and chill the fuck out? 594 00:32:18,460 --> 00:32:19,700 Hey, don't leave me on my-- 595 00:33:21,620 --> 00:33:22,580 - Oh, my God! - Alex... 596 00:33:22,580 --> 00:33:23,980 Ashes... 597 00:33:26,220 --> 00:33:27,980 - You all right? - Oh, God. 598 00:33:27,980 --> 00:33:30,620 - You okay? - Sorry. I just... zoned out. 599 00:33:30,700 --> 00:33:32,100 Yeah. 600 00:33:33,820 --> 00:33:35,220 Thanks. 601 00:33:35,860 --> 00:33:37,300 - Your mate... - Yeah. 602 00:33:38,220 --> 00:33:39,460 - She's seeing anyone? - Yes. 603 00:33:39,460 --> 00:33:40,780 Yeah, I thought so. 604 00:33:45,820 --> 00:33:46,940 - How about you? - Me? 605 00:33:46,940 --> 00:33:49,460 - Yeah. - I'm a massive bender, sorry. 606 00:33:50,780 --> 00:33:51,940 Fair dues. 607 00:33:52,820 --> 00:33:54,140 Fair dues. 608 00:34:02,340 --> 00:34:03,740 - I'll be on. - Good. 609 00:34:13,860 --> 00:34:15,500 Adam rescued me in London. 610 00:34:15,500 --> 00:34:16,420 Really? 611 00:34:16,420 --> 00:34:19,460 I'd been there for a couple of weeks or something. It was a Sunday. 612 00:34:19,460 --> 00:34:20,740 Really busy. 613 00:34:20,940 --> 00:34:24,140 And I was on my way to the fucking, I don't know, Tate or something... 614 00:34:24,140 --> 00:34:25,940 and this pigeon shat on me. 615 00:34:26,340 --> 00:34:28,700 - And then an old man flashed me. - Oh, God! 616 00:34:28,700 --> 00:34:31,180 And I was eating this awful sandwich. 617 00:34:31,180 --> 00:34:33,980 She told me it was halloumi and it wasn't. 618 00:34:34,100 --> 00:34:35,620 I just started crying. 619 00:34:36,460 --> 00:34:38,940 Bawling, you know, like a little kid. 620 00:34:39,220 --> 00:34:41,580 And then... Adam just appeared. 621 00:34:43,100 --> 00:34:45,540 I don't know how. He was just there. 622 00:34:45,540 --> 00:34:47,100 He gave me this hug... 623 00:34:47,500 --> 00:34:50,100 and he told me everything was gonna be okay... 624 00:34:50,100 --> 00:34:53,940 and that he knew somewhere where I might be a bit happier. 625 00:34:54,100 --> 00:34:55,620 He does seem pretty... 626 00:34:55,980 --> 00:34:57,980 - Pretty cool. - He's amazing. 627 00:35:40,380 --> 00:35:41,980 ...and they're dead. 628 00:35:41,980 --> 00:35:43,660 And they burn out, but... 629 00:35:44,260 --> 00:35:45,500 but in the future. 630 00:35:48,020 --> 00:35:49,260 No, hang on. 631 00:35:51,700 --> 00:35:53,100 Yeah... The past. 632 00:35:53,620 --> 00:35:56,220 They're the past. We... We're looking at the past... 633 00:35:56,220 --> 00:35:58,820 because they're... They're dead. 634 00:35:58,940 --> 00:36:01,500 But, to us, they are still burning. 635 00:36:02,140 --> 00:36:05,020 That is... That is life from the past. 636 00:36:05,980 --> 00:36:07,540 You know, that is life. 637 00:36:08,780 --> 00:36:11,060 You know, The Tudors or something. 638 00:36:12,940 --> 00:36:14,340 And we just waste... 639 00:36:15,660 --> 00:36:16,780 this time. 640 00:36:16,780 --> 00:36:18,820 And waste our lives just... 641 00:36:20,500 --> 00:36:24,100 worrying about things that don't even matter. Like... 642 00:36:25,340 --> 00:36:26,740 am I too fat? 643 00:36:28,300 --> 00:36:29,860 Does she still love me? 644 00:36:32,340 --> 00:36:35,140 Why did I get that tattoo? It sucks a bit. 645 00:36:37,020 --> 00:36:41,100 And we fight each other and kill each other and argue about... 646 00:36:42,100 --> 00:36:45,340 my God is better than your God and all that shit. 647 00:36:47,740 --> 00:36:49,620 And all the while, we are... 648 00:36:50,940 --> 00:36:53,100 we are looking out at death. 649 00:36:54,700 --> 00:36:56,540 And it's really beautiful. 650 00:36:57,580 --> 00:37:01,780 And that is actually, literally... 651 00:37:02,620 --> 00:37:05,460 lighting up the fucking sky at night. 652 00:37:07,660 --> 00:37:10,500 We should just... We should just be calm... 653 00:37:10,500 --> 00:37:11,700 and say... 654 00:37:12,540 --> 00:37:14,020 And say, "Oh, fuck it. 655 00:37:14,860 --> 00:37:16,260 It doesn't matter." 656 00:37:16,620 --> 00:37:18,020 'Cause... 657 00:37:18,660 --> 00:37:19,980 nothing matters. 658 00:37:21,500 --> 00:37:22,820 Because it's okay. 659 00:37:25,180 --> 00:37:26,380 God, Adam. 660 00:37:27,100 --> 00:37:28,460 Sorry, I got a bit-- 661 00:37:28,540 --> 00:37:29,940 No! 662 00:37:31,500 --> 00:37:33,660 Dan would have really liked you. 663 00:37:34,220 --> 00:37:35,940 Yeah. Yeah, he would. 664 00:37:37,340 --> 00:37:39,940 I'd say that is a profound compliment. 665 00:37:43,220 --> 00:37:45,340 - To Dan. - To Dan. 666 00:37:45,420 --> 00:37:46,700 - To Dan. - To Dan. 667 00:38:02,580 --> 00:38:04,140 Have you seen my shoes? 668 00:38:06,140 --> 00:38:07,540 No. 669 00:38:11,380 --> 00:38:12,780 Jesus. 670 00:38:16,100 --> 00:38:17,300 Alex? 671 00:38:19,460 --> 00:38:20,620 Alex! 672 00:38:25,300 --> 00:38:26,500 Alex. 673 00:38:26,500 --> 00:38:27,900 Fuck. What? 674 00:38:28,820 --> 00:38:30,780 Alex, it's okay. It's me. 675 00:38:31,020 --> 00:38:32,980 Oh, Jesus... How I... Christ. 676 00:38:33,060 --> 00:38:34,180 I know. 677 00:38:34,180 --> 00:38:35,660 Where the fuck are we? 678 00:38:35,700 --> 00:38:36,980 On a farm. 679 00:38:37,500 --> 00:38:38,700 Oh, God. 680 00:38:38,940 --> 00:38:42,260 It's fine. Come on. Let's just go. It's... It's fine. 681 00:38:42,260 --> 00:38:44,700 We'll get some breakfast on the way. 682 00:38:56,340 --> 00:38:57,500 Ahoy there! 683 00:38:58,380 --> 00:38:59,700 - Oh, hi. - How are you? 684 00:38:59,700 --> 00:39:00,900 Bit rough, yeah? 685 00:39:02,620 --> 00:39:04,060 What time are we off? 686 00:39:05,700 --> 00:39:07,100 What? 687 00:39:07,180 --> 00:39:09,580 Come in the car with us. We'll take you. 688 00:39:09,580 --> 00:39:10,740 - Really? - Yeah. 689 00:39:10,940 --> 00:39:12,300 Yeah. 690 00:39:12,420 --> 00:39:13,820 Cardiff, yeah. 691 00:39:14,020 --> 00:39:15,420 Cardiff. 692 00:39:16,140 --> 00:39:18,140 Girls are just getting their shit together, so... 693 00:39:18,140 --> 00:39:20,060 I'll see you in a sec, yeah? 694 00:39:20,340 --> 00:39:21,620 Road trip. 695 00:39:28,700 --> 00:39:30,980 Music can be a distraction. 696 00:39:31,500 --> 00:39:32,660 Sometimes... 697 00:39:33,700 --> 00:39:36,100 You know, sometimes it's better just to... 698 00:39:36,100 --> 00:39:40,140 to listen to what's already there... out there in the ether. 699 00:39:41,980 --> 00:39:44,380 You know, you just listen. You lis-- 700 00:39:44,820 --> 00:39:45,860 Listen. 701 00:39:45,860 --> 00:39:48,420 And... And see what you can hear. 702 00:39:48,540 --> 00:39:49,940 See... 703 00:39:50,340 --> 00:39:51,620 Now I can hear... 704 00:39:52,220 --> 00:39:53,420 Now you could hear the rain. 705 00:39:53,420 --> 00:39:55,660 Pitter patter, pitter patter, pitter patter. 706 00:39:55,660 --> 00:39:57,060 And I could hear... 707 00:39:58,100 --> 00:39:59,540 hear the road beneath us. 708 00:39:59,540 --> 00:40:01,220 You know, that's a constant... 709 00:40:01,220 --> 00:40:02,620 Sorry. 710 00:40:03,900 --> 00:40:05,180 It's quite... 711 00:40:05,220 --> 00:40:07,500 Yeah, it's quite a rough surface. 712 00:40:08,380 --> 00:40:11,220 All part of the journey, though. Isn't it? 713 00:40:11,260 --> 00:40:12,540 And... 714 00:40:14,020 --> 00:40:16,340 Vibration. What's that vibration? 715 00:40:17,820 --> 00:40:21,660 That's... That's actually... That's the vibration of my phone. 716 00:40:21,660 --> 00:40:23,220 See? Who... Who is it? Who's that? 717 00:40:23,220 --> 00:40:26,380 Who's... Yeah, probably. 718 00:40:27,740 --> 00:40:29,940 Cool. We'll call him back later. 719 00:40:30,020 --> 00:40:31,540 And then there's all of us together. 720 00:40:31,540 --> 00:40:33,740 There's all our energy together. 721 00:40:34,940 --> 00:40:37,420 Can you hear the buzz? 722 00:40:39,020 --> 00:40:41,180 That's the buzz. The buzz of us. 723 00:40:43,100 --> 00:40:44,300 Is this your car? 724 00:40:44,740 --> 00:40:47,460 - No it's Dan's stepdad's. - Who's Dan? 725 00:40:48,780 --> 00:40:50,300 Oh, shoot. Sorry. Sorry. 726 00:40:50,300 --> 00:40:51,460 Sorry. 727 00:41:09,060 --> 00:41:10,660 You guys want anything? 728 00:41:11,380 --> 00:41:12,740 No, we're all right. Thanks. 729 00:41:12,740 --> 00:41:14,620 Cool. See you in a second. 730 00:41:18,980 --> 00:41:20,700 Actually, I should probably go for a wee. 731 00:41:20,700 --> 00:41:21,860 - Wait. - What? 732 00:41:22,540 --> 00:41:24,660 - I'm not driving up to Cardiff. - What? 733 00:41:24,660 --> 00:41:27,500 I know, I know. I'm a terrible person. But... 734 00:41:27,500 --> 00:41:28,900 I'm not doing it. 735 00:41:29,180 --> 00:41:30,460 They're weird. 736 00:41:30,540 --> 00:41:32,940 He's old and... they're weird! 737 00:41:33,500 --> 00:41:34,980 They make me feel panicky. 738 00:41:34,980 --> 00:41:36,580 What if I end up like that? 739 00:41:36,580 --> 00:41:40,180 I mean, is that what happens when you're arty, but essentially a big shit? 740 00:41:40,180 --> 00:41:43,420 He has the charisma of a benign Charles Manson. 741 00:41:43,940 --> 00:41:45,660 - I don't like it! - But... 742 00:41:45,660 --> 00:41:47,340 I'll end up killing one of them. 743 00:41:47,340 --> 00:41:50,580 I swear to God, I'll use one of them as a weapon to kill the other two. 744 00:41:50,580 --> 00:41:52,540 Right. But, I mean, can we... 745 00:41:52,860 --> 00:41:55,060 I mean, could we just leave them? 746 00:41:56,540 --> 00:41:58,500 Dan would have hated them. 747 00:41:59,260 --> 00:42:00,420 He hates them. 748 00:42:29,220 --> 00:42:30,460 I feel really bad. 749 00:42:30,460 --> 00:42:31,420 Oh, shut up. 750 00:42:31,420 --> 00:42:33,060 I think we should go back and get them. 751 00:42:33,060 --> 00:42:34,140 No way! 752 00:42:34,140 --> 00:42:36,100 But, seriously, what if something happens to them? 753 00:42:36,100 --> 00:42:38,540 Look, Alex, we've done a bad thing, okay? 754 00:42:38,540 --> 00:42:39,620 Just... 755 00:42:39,620 --> 00:42:40,820 try and enjoy it. 756 00:43:09,020 --> 00:43:10,420 What? 757 00:43:10,940 --> 00:43:12,300 Welcome to Wales. 758 00:43:12,580 --> 00:43:14,020 You are now in Wales. 759 00:43:17,220 --> 00:43:19,020 Where does your mum live? 760 00:43:19,020 --> 00:43:20,420 Why? 761 00:43:20,940 --> 00:43:22,820 I don't know. Never met her. 762 00:43:22,820 --> 00:43:24,660 Well, why would you? 763 00:43:24,820 --> 00:43:27,980 I've met most people's mums. You've met mine. 764 00:43:29,700 --> 00:43:31,100 I don't know... 765 00:43:32,020 --> 00:43:34,220 I've known you for nearly ten years. 766 00:43:34,220 --> 00:43:36,460 We're scattering the ashes of our newly dead friend. 767 00:43:36,460 --> 00:43:39,700 And you're telling me that me meeting your mum would be... what? 768 00:43:39,700 --> 00:43:43,060 Taking this to an inappropriate level of intimacy? 769 00:43:57,620 --> 00:44:00,300 Do I look like children's TV presenter in this scarf? 770 00:44:00,300 --> 00:44:01,660 What? No. Shut up. 771 00:44:03,660 --> 00:44:05,780 They're different to your mum, so... 772 00:44:05,780 --> 00:44:06,980 Don't be a dick. 773 00:44:08,340 --> 00:44:10,860 Now, listen. I haven't told her what we're doing on the phone. 774 00:44:10,860 --> 00:44:12,260 I haven't told her about Dan. 775 00:44:12,260 --> 00:44:13,540 What? Why? 776 00:44:13,540 --> 00:44:14,700 Just because. 777 00:44:14,700 --> 00:44:17,780 Please don't say anything. She'll get upset. 778 00:44:20,500 --> 00:44:22,660 I've said we're scattering your granny. 779 00:44:22,660 --> 00:44:23,820 What? 780 00:44:29,580 --> 00:44:31,420 - Hello. - Hello. Hi. 781 00:44:32,420 --> 00:44:33,620 Come in. 782 00:44:42,620 --> 00:44:45,260 What a lovely thing you're doing for your nan. 783 00:44:45,260 --> 00:44:48,020 Oh, well, you know, it's what she wanted. 784 00:44:50,020 --> 00:44:51,780 You'll stay tonight, won't you? 785 00:44:51,780 --> 00:44:53,380 Mum, I told you, we... We got to-- 786 00:44:53,380 --> 00:44:54,740 Come on, Al? 787 00:44:55,420 --> 00:44:56,580 We'd love to. 788 00:44:57,340 --> 00:44:58,500 Brilliant! 789 00:44:58,860 --> 00:45:01,540 Yeah, I got the bedding out just in case. 790 00:45:04,100 --> 00:45:06,180 Chicken kiev's okay for your tea? 791 00:45:06,180 --> 00:45:07,540 Lovely. 792 00:45:08,380 --> 00:45:10,420 I'll... I'll put the oven on. 793 00:45:12,100 --> 00:45:13,660 What's wrong with you? 794 00:45:14,700 --> 00:45:16,100 She's so nice. 795 00:45:19,540 --> 00:45:21,340 Do you need a hand, Shelle? 796 00:45:30,900 --> 00:45:32,180 It's a new carpet? 797 00:45:32,380 --> 00:45:33,700 It is, yes. 798 00:45:33,940 --> 00:45:36,020 Do you know Dai's lad down the hill? 799 00:45:36,020 --> 00:45:37,380 No. 800 00:45:38,460 --> 00:45:40,020 He lives down the hill. 801 00:45:40,420 --> 00:45:42,820 This is our postman, Dai Persephone. 802 00:45:43,100 --> 00:45:44,500 Oh, right. 803 00:45:44,900 --> 00:45:46,780 But he's got a son, Dai does. 804 00:45:46,780 --> 00:45:48,180 Evan, his name is... 805 00:45:48,460 --> 00:45:50,100 from his first marriage. 806 00:45:50,420 --> 00:45:51,820 Didn't work out. 807 00:45:52,780 --> 00:45:55,420 She ran off with a man from the Council. 808 00:45:55,420 --> 00:45:56,820 Nasty piece of work. 809 00:45:57,180 --> 00:45:58,340 Malcolm... 810 00:45:58,620 --> 00:45:59,980 Smelt like bacon. 811 00:46:00,900 --> 00:46:02,460 Anyway, Evan's a sweet lad, 812 00:46:02,460 --> 00:46:04,820 and he runs his own carpet shop. 813 00:46:05,020 --> 00:46:06,260 He does it on the Internet, 814 00:46:06,260 --> 00:46:08,820 as well as having a little shop you can go into. 815 00:46:08,820 --> 00:46:10,180 Making a killing. 816 00:46:10,220 --> 00:46:13,740 Actually, more like a genocide, in terms of numbers, apparently. 817 00:46:13,740 --> 00:46:15,860 Anyway, he knew I needed a new carpet 818 00:46:15,860 --> 00:46:18,180 because I've been going on about it for months. 819 00:46:18,180 --> 00:46:20,340 And I was down his way about a fortnight ago, 820 00:46:20,340 --> 00:46:22,420 and he said to me, "Oye, Shelle! 821 00:46:22,420 --> 00:46:25,420 I am doing a certain kind of carpet for half price this week." 822 00:46:25,420 --> 00:46:26,980 And I said, "All right, are you?" 823 00:46:26,980 --> 00:46:28,340 And he said, "Yes"! 824 00:46:29,140 --> 00:46:31,140 Oh, he fitted the whole thing. 825 00:46:31,900 --> 00:46:33,540 Only took about an hour. 826 00:46:34,140 --> 00:46:35,340 Oh, it's lovely. 827 00:46:35,980 --> 00:46:37,140 It is lovely. 828 00:46:37,460 --> 00:46:38,900 It's a lovely color. 829 00:46:39,020 --> 00:46:40,340 Oh, thank you. 830 00:46:43,300 --> 00:46:44,460 Do you like it? 831 00:46:46,220 --> 00:46:48,180 Yeah. Yeah, it's quite nice. 832 00:46:53,020 --> 00:46:55,020 She doesn't know about Dan... 833 00:46:55,860 --> 00:46:57,180 What about Pandora? 834 00:46:59,580 --> 00:47:01,540 Does she even know about her? 835 00:47:03,860 --> 00:47:05,860 Al, does she know you're gay? 836 00:47:31,820 --> 00:47:33,340 Hey. It's me. 837 00:47:34,980 --> 00:47:36,540 Can you call me please? 838 00:47:36,860 --> 00:47:38,220 It feels weird. 839 00:47:38,740 --> 00:47:42,260 I've been doing some very weird things since you've not been here. 840 00:47:42,260 --> 00:47:44,900 Just ate a pack of crisps on the toilet. 841 00:47:47,700 --> 00:47:49,060 And... 842 00:47:49,860 --> 00:47:52,060 I've been feeling bad about Dan. 843 00:47:53,660 --> 00:47:54,980 I didn't hate him. 844 00:47:55,900 --> 00:47:57,300 He just... 845 00:47:57,820 --> 00:48:01,060 could be a bit of a twat sometimes, couldn't he? 846 00:48:02,740 --> 00:48:04,300 But I didn't hate him. 847 00:48:34,340 --> 00:48:35,740 All right. Bye. 848 00:48:38,660 --> 00:48:40,300 Look after her, won't you? 849 00:48:40,300 --> 00:48:41,620 Of course, I will. 850 00:48:42,500 --> 00:48:43,940 Thanks for having us. 851 00:48:49,020 --> 00:48:49,900 Al... 852 00:48:49,900 --> 00:48:52,820 I really do not want to talk about it, okay? 853 00:49:03,620 --> 00:49:04,860 What? 854 00:49:04,940 --> 00:49:06,380 This can't be right. 855 00:49:07,860 --> 00:49:09,900 Oh, let's just watch the video. 856 00:49:09,900 --> 00:49:11,900 And what is the significance... 857 00:49:11,900 --> 00:49:13,460 of Livid Nightclub, you ask? 858 00:49:13,460 --> 00:49:15,020 Well, traveling friends, 859 00:49:15,020 --> 00:49:18,780 you are standing by the hallowed ground upon which I lost my virginity 860 00:49:18,780 --> 00:49:20,540 on a geography field trip. 861 00:49:21,500 --> 00:49:22,700 It was beautiful. 862 00:49:22,940 --> 00:49:26,140 I mean, sure, it was in a toilet, but it was beautiful. 863 00:49:26,140 --> 00:49:28,740 I was 13. She was a bit older. 864 00:49:28,860 --> 00:49:30,420 We both had train tracks, 865 00:49:30,420 --> 00:49:33,780 and I had a light smattering of acne on my top lip. 866 00:49:34,180 --> 00:49:35,580 Hot. 867 00:49:35,780 --> 00:49:37,580 And as a result of my love affair, 868 00:49:37,580 --> 00:49:39,660 I remember very little about shale formation, 869 00:49:39,660 --> 00:49:41,100 and the word fannies. 870 00:49:43,580 --> 00:49:44,780 Fuck. 871 00:49:46,940 --> 00:49:48,140 Cheers. 872 00:49:52,060 --> 00:49:53,220 So... 873 00:49:53,500 --> 00:49:55,020 I was Googling this... 874 00:49:56,220 --> 00:49:59,060 thing today. It's crazy. You should do it. 875 00:49:59,300 --> 00:50:02,260 Apparently, it's a one in 800,000 chance... 876 00:50:02,260 --> 00:50:04,980 of someone my age getting pancreatic cancer. 877 00:50:04,980 --> 00:50:07,260 One in 800,000! 878 00:50:07,980 --> 00:50:09,220 Lucky. 879 00:50:10,420 --> 00:50:12,460 Yeah, basically, very special. 880 00:50:13,580 --> 00:50:14,980 Okay. Right. 881 00:50:15,300 --> 00:50:16,740 We're gonna play a game. 882 00:50:16,740 --> 00:50:20,380 I want... I want each of you to tell the other one 883 00:50:20,500 --> 00:50:23,060 something about yourself that they don't know. 884 00:50:23,060 --> 00:50:24,620 Do it now. Pause the video. 885 00:50:24,620 --> 00:50:25,780 Pause the video! 886 00:50:26,780 --> 00:50:28,180 Oh, come on. 887 00:50:29,100 --> 00:50:32,220 I don't think I'm in love with James anymore. 888 00:50:32,980 --> 00:50:34,380 What? 889 00:50:36,180 --> 00:50:39,340 - Well, what are you going to do? - I don't know. 890 00:50:40,740 --> 00:50:41,940 You go. 891 00:50:41,940 --> 00:50:44,340 What? No. I'm sorry. Can we just... 892 00:50:44,460 --> 00:50:46,540 Okay, here's a fun fact. 893 00:50:47,380 --> 00:50:49,900 Fun? Yeah, it's actually quite weird. 894 00:50:50,700 --> 00:50:52,140 That you have both... 895 00:50:52,820 --> 00:50:54,820 at some point in your lives... 896 00:50:55,540 --> 00:50:58,460 given me a blowjob. 897 00:51:01,060 --> 00:51:02,460 Awkward! 898 00:51:04,580 --> 00:51:07,020 Fuck. I'm sorry. I'm awful. 899 00:51:07,500 --> 00:51:08,780 We're awful. 900 00:51:10,540 --> 00:51:13,980 Yeah, I love you both very much. But... 901 00:51:15,260 --> 00:51:16,540 not in a sexy way. 902 00:51:17,500 --> 00:51:20,660 I'm just glad we worked that out before I died. 903 00:51:23,340 --> 00:51:25,540 Not that it worked out much else. 904 00:51:25,660 --> 00:51:28,820 Fuck, I always thought I would know eventually. 905 00:51:29,020 --> 00:51:30,100 You know... 906 00:51:30,100 --> 00:51:34,100 I mean, definitely before I fucking died, I thought I'd settle. 907 00:51:34,100 --> 00:51:36,060 And I'd have a husband or a wife 908 00:51:36,060 --> 00:51:39,580 and we'd be 80, living in charming artistic squalor. 909 00:51:40,860 --> 00:51:43,500 Okay, Seph, you need to ask Al to tell you... 910 00:51:43,500 --> 00:51:44,900 about Amy. 911 00:51:45,780 --> 00:51:47,220 That one is serious, Al. 912 00:51:47,220 --> 00:51:48,980 You need to do that, okay? 913 00:51:50,340 --> 00:51:51,740 Just please. 914 00:51:52,420 --> 00:51:55,420 Because I know I'm the only person you told, Al. And... 915 00:51:55,420 --> 00:51:57,860 I'm not gonna be around anymore. I won't be able to help you. 916 00:51:57,860 --> 00:51:59,420 So just tell someone else. 917 00:51:59,420 --> 00:52:00,620 All right, Yoda! 918 00:52:00,820 --> 00:52:02,220 Jesus. 919 00:52:13,980 --> 00:52:16,220 All right, go on, then. When did you do it? 920 00:52:16,220 --> 00:52:17,260 Years ago. 921 00:52:17,260 --> 00:52:19,020 That time we went to Corfu. 922 00:52:19,020 --> 00:52:21,100 And you all became convinced I was an alcoholic. 923 00:52:21,100 --> 00:52:22,020 Oh, yeah. 924 00:52:22,020 --> 00:52:24,780 You took me to an AA meeting in a Taverna. 925 00:52:26,060 --> 00:52:27,340 When did you do it? 926 00:52:28,900 --> 00:52:30,260 At his mum's house. 927 00:52:30,780 --> 00:52:32,380 One of his birthdays... 928 00:52:32,500 --> 00:52:33,940 It was fancy dress... 929 00:52:34,260 --> 00:52:36,020 and I was wearing a crown. 930 00:52:36,540 --> 00:52:37,820 I initiated the whole thing. 931 00:52:37,820 --> 00:52:39,140 - Did you? - Yeah. 932 00:52:39,140 --> 00:52:40,300 Brazen. 933 00:52:41,380 --> 00:52:42,860 Did you keep your crown on? 934 00:52:42,860 --> 00:52:44,260 Yes. 935 00:52:48,180 --> 00:52:49,340 James? 936 00:52:50,220 --> 00:52:51,620 Oh, God. 937 00:52:53,820 --> 00:52:56,420 I mean, he's nice and he's kind and... 938 00:52:56,820 --> 00:52:58,140 he's all other things. 939 00:52:58,140 --> 00:52:59,340 All of them. 940 00:52:59,900 --> 00:53:01,060 But... 941 00:53:01,460 --> 00:53:04,700 It's got to the point where I can read his face so well. 942 00:53:04,700 --> 00:53:06,060 I know his sex eyes. 943 00:53:06,700 --> 00:53:10,020 You know, when someone's trying to initiate sex, right? 944 00:53:10,020 --> 00:53:11,340 And my heart sinks. 945 00:53:12,300 --> 00:53:13,460 I just think... 946 00:53:14,140 --> 00:53:15,420 "Go on, then. 947 00:53:15,460 --> 00:53:18,780 Probably less mind-numbing than talking to you for another eight minutes." 948 00:53:18,780 --> 00:53:21,420 I mean, I've had sex out of politeness before... 949 00:53:21,420 --> 00:53:22,940 you know, with people. 950 00:53:23,140 --> 00:53:26,300 When you think this is probably less awkward and time consuming 951 00:53:26,300 --> 00:53:28,940 than explaining to you why I'm backing out. 952 00:53:28,940 --> 00:53:31,060 But it shouldn't be happening with him... 953 00:53:31,060 --> 00:53:32,500 with James, should it? 954 00:53:32,500 --> 00:53:34,300 No. Probably not. 955 00:53:39,180 --> 00:53:40,380 Who's Amy? 956 00:53:40,380 --> 00:53:41,780 No. 957 00:53:42,580 --> 00:53:45,580 Let's go to our hotel and get really pissed. 958 00:53:45,980 --> 00:53:48,660 Fuck that. Let's take Dan back to Livid. 959 00:53:55,860 --> 00:53:57,660 Fuck. It's fucking freezing. 960 00:53:57,660 --> 00:53:58,860 You want my coat? 961 00:53:59,100 --> 00:54:00,820 - It comes at a price. - Fuck off. 962 00:54:00,820 --> 00:54:02,140 Yeah, we're all right. Thanks. 963 00:54:02,140 --> 00:54:03,780 No, he's just being a cock. 964 00:54:03,780 --> 00:54:05,380 Serious. Have it. 965 00:54:06,580 --> 00:54:07,980 Are you sure? 966 00:54:10,100 --> 00:54:11,300 Thanks. 967 00:54:44,420 --> 00:54:45,620 Excuse me. 968 00:54:46,260 --> 00:54:47,660 Excuse me! 969 00:54:59,180 --> 00:55:00,900 Oy! She's got a boyfriend. 970 00:55:00,900 --> 00:55:02,300 - So? - So she's got a boyfriend! 971 00:55:02,300 --> 00:55:04,980 - You've got a fucking boyfriend. - You do? 972 00:55:04,980 --> 00:55:07,380 - Maybe. - She does. His name's James. 973 00:55:07,380 --> 00:55:08,900 Oh, piss off, Al. 974 00:55:34,020 --> 00:55:35,580 This is all your fault. 975 00:55:41,780 --> 00:55:42,860 Oh, shit. 976 00:55:42,860 --> 00:55:44,020 What? 977 00:55:44,380 --> 00:55:45,860 I need to talk to her. 978 00:55:45,900 --> 00:55:47,060 Okay. 979 00:55:47,620 --> 00:55:48,700 Alone. 980 00:55:48,700 --> 00:55:50,660 Oh, all right. I'll... I'll just stand over here. 981 00:55:50,660 --> 00:55:53,820 No, you go back inside. I'll find you in a minute. 982 00:55:53,820 --> 00:55:54,940 Can I get your number? 983 00:55:54,940 --> 00:55:56,740 I'll find you back inside. 984 00:56:03,300 --> 00:56:04,780 Did you just shag him? 985 00:56:05,500 --> 00:56:06,780 It was a homage... 986 00:56:07,740 --> 00:56:08,900 A what? 987 00:56:08,900 --> 00:56:10,700 An homage to Dan. 988 00:56:11,820 --> 00:56:13,300 We were in the toilet. 989 00:56:15,740 --> 00:56:16,820 Alex! 990 00:56:16,820 --> 00:56:18,900 Hey, this is Seph's phone. I'm away for a bit. 991 00:56:18,900 --> 00:56:21,500 But leave me a message and I'll call you when I get back. 992 00:56:21,500 --> 00:56:23,340 Seph, call me back. Please. 993 00:56:24,820 --> 00:56:26,140 Please. I know you're pissed off 994 00:56:26,140 --> 00:56:29,220 but this is starting to make me feel pathetic. 995 00:56:31,620 --> 00:56:33,020 Come on. 996 00:56:33,340 --> 00:56:34,740 Little mouse... 997 00:56:36,060 --> 00:56:37,860 I've been to your house... 998 00:56:38,180 --> 00:56:39,660 and you're not there. 999 00:56:40,220 --> 00:56:41,620 Where are you? 1000 00:56:43,980 --> 00:56:45,340 Where are you? 1001 00:56:51,420 --> 00:56:53,340 - Alex, wait. - Seph, please. Just stop talking. 1002 00:56:53,340 --> 00:56:54,700 - You all right? - Yes. 1003 00:56:54,700 --> 00:56:56,260 - Good night? - Yeah. Sorry, we're just-- 1004 00:56:56,260 --> 00:56:57,700 - You two having a row? - No. We're-- 1005 00:56:57,700 --> 00:56:58,860 You're having a lesbian row? 1006 00:56:58,860 --> 00:57:01,900 - No! We're just... Please. I... - Can we give you a little kiss? 1007 00:57:01,900 --> 00:57:04,660 - No, I'm all right. Thanks. - Back off, mate. 1008 00:57:04,660 --> 00:57:06,420 Just a little kiss. That's all right, innit? 1009 00:57:06,420 --> 00:57:08,020 Are you trying to get him to snog you? 1010 00:57:08,020 --> 00:57:09,220 Jesus Christ. 1011 00:57:09,220 --> 00:57:11,140 - You can touch my cock if you want. - Oh, God. 1012 00:57:11,140 --> 00:57:12,140 I don't... I don't mind. 1013 00:57:12,140 --> 00:57:14,260 Or, you know, you two could get off with each other... 1014 00:57:14,260 --> 00:57:15,580 and I could touch my own cock. 1015 00:57:15,580 --> 00:57:17,940 No. Can you let me... Could we just use the cashpoint? 1016 00:57:17,940 --> 00:57:19,300 Oh, why so sensitive? 1017 00:57:19,300 --> 00:57:20,900 - It's just a fucking joke. - Yeah. 1018 00:57:20,900 --> 00:57:22,140 You wanna touch his cock? 1019 00:57:22,140 --> 00:57:23,420 I've seen it. It's massive. 1020 00:57:23,420 --> 00:57:24,300 Gay. 1021 00:57:24,300 --> 00:57:25,460 Thick as a baby's arm, love. 1022 00:57:25,460 --> 00:57:26,700 Been really nice to meet you. 1023 00:57:26,700 --> 00:57:28,780 Please. I don't wanna touch you or have sex with you. 1024 00:57:28,780 --> 00:57:30,740 I'm really tired. I just wanna use the cashpoint. 1025 00:57:30,740 --> 00:57:33,220 So can you please just let me do that? 1026 00:57:33,700 --> 00:57:36,100 You actually think I wanna fuck you? 1027 00:57:37,300 --> 00:57:38,580 You think I... 1028 00:57:39,260 --> 00:57:40,700 would wanna fuck you? 1029 00:57:41,340 --> 00:57:42,500 You arrogant little bitch. 1030 00:57:42,500 --> 00:57:43,540 I'm... I'm not... 1031 00:57:43,540 --> 00:57:46,340 Well, you know what? I would fuck you. I would. 1032 00:57:46,340 --> 00:57:47,860 But I wouldn't like it. 1033 00:57:47,860 --> 00:57:49,380 And neither would you. 1034 00:57:49,380 --> 00:57:52,060 But I'd do it to teach you a lesson, you fucking dike. 1035 00:57:54,140 --> 00:57:56,580 What the fuck's the matter with you? 1036 00:58:01,780 --> 00:58:03,340 What the fuck was that? 1037 00:58:04,460 --> 00:58:07,380 I got taught that in self-defense in school. 1038 00:58:07,380 --> 00:58:09,060 Panic row with your arms. 1039 00:58:09,300 --> 00:58:10,780 Confuse the attacker. 1040 00:58:10,780 --> 00:58:13,140 Majority of people don't actually want to assault someone 1041 00:58:13,140 --> 00:58:15,820 who manifests genuine psychiatric problems. 1042 00:58:15,820 --> 00:58:16,980 Too much hassle. 1043 00:58:18,900 --> 00:58:21,940 I mean, technically that's the windmill, isn't it? 1044 00:58:21,940 --> 00:58:23,100 Sure. 1045 00:58:24,580 --> 00:58:27,820 Look, we can just go home if you're so fucking furious, Alex. 1046 00:58:27,820 --> 00:58:29,340 Dan wanted us to take him to York. 1047 00:58:29,340 --> 00:58:31,260 So we're taking him to York. 1048 00:58:32,380 --> 00:58:33,940 God, I miss him. 1049 00:58:34,620 --> 00:58:35,980 Me too. 1050 00:58:56,860 --> 00:58:57,780 - My... - Alex? 1051 00:58:57,780 --> 00:58:58,940 ...ashes. 1052 00:59:18,100 --> 00:59:19,500 Hi, James. 1053 00:59:24,340 --> 00:59:25,900 James says to call him. 1054 00:59:26,140 --> 00:59:27,420 What? 1055 00:59:27,420 --> 00:59:30,420 - Alex, what did you say-- - Fuck off. As if I'd tell him. 1056 00:59:30,420 --> 00:59:32,020 Give me a bit of credit. 1057 00:59:33,060 --> 00:59:34,220 Sorry. 1058 00:59:34,780 --> 00:59:39,260 I just said we're on our way to York and that your phone's run out. 1059 00:59:40,940 --> 00:59:43,300 Look, I'm sorry if what I did upset you. 1060 00:59:43,300 --> 00:59:44,820 That's not an apology. 1061 00:59:44,820 --> 00:59:45,820 What? 1062 00:59:45,820 --> 00:59:47,620 If you put the onus on the person's reaction 1063 00:59:47,620 --> 00:59:50,740 rather than what you did, it's not an apology. 1064 00:59:51,220 --> 00:59:53,580 "Sorry for what I did" is being actually sorry. 1065 00:59:53,580 --> 00:59:56,140 "Sorry if what I did upset you" is not. 1066 00:59:56,340 --> 00:59:58,580 You're basically telling me I'm being overly sensitive. 1067 00:59:58,580 --> 00:59:59,940 Jesus Christ. 1068 01:00:00,660 --> 01:00:04,060 - Look, Al. I just wanted-- - We don't have to talk about it. 1069 01:00:04,060 --> 01:00:05,980 - I want to! - Well, I don't. 1070 01:00:05,980 --> 01:00:07,980 - Why not? - Why, do you think? 1071 01:00:08,140 --> 01:00:10,580 - It's not the same. - Stop talking about it! 1072 01:00:10,580 --> 01:00:14,860 Look, it's not like I think that what she did to you is okay, Al. 1073 01:00:16,740 --> 01:00:18,620 What the fuck are you doing? 1074 01:00:18,620 --> 01:00:20,660 If I say I don't wanna talk about something, 1075 01:00:20,660 --> 01:00:22,620 I fucking mean it, all right? 1076 01:00:35,220 --> 01:00:36,380 Fuck! 1077 01:00:37,220 --> 01:00:39,220 Have you ever done an Airbnb before? 1078 01:00:39,220 --> 01:00:42,140 No. Weirdly, I still prefer hotels to complete strangers' houses. 1079 01:00:42,140 --> 01:00:43,500 Excellent. 1080 01:00:44,060 --> 01:00:46,020 So our host's name is Doug. 1081 01:00:46,260 --> 01:00:48,940 Twenty five reviews of people saying what a nice man he is. 1082 01:00:48,940 --> 01:00:52,140 You're gonna get a bonk on him as well, are you? 1083 01:00:58,660 --> 01:01:00,020 My goodness. 1084 01:01:00,700 --> 01:01:01,860 How tragic! 1085 01:01:03,420 --> 01:01:05,420 Do you know why he chose York? 1086 01:01:05,860 --> 01:01:08,220 We tend to find out when we watch the videos. 1087 01:01:08,220 --> 01:01:09,620 I see. 1088 01:01:10,380 --> 01:01:11,380 Must be off. 1089 01:01:11,380 --> 01:01:12,660 Rehearsals. 1090 01:01:13,140 --> 01:01:15,900 Look, I'll... I'll leave you these keys. 1091 01:01:16,300 --> 01:01:17,500 Are you an actor? 1092 01:01:18,260 --> 01:01:19,420 Am-dram. 1093 01:01:20,020 --> 01:01:21,540 What are you rehearsing? 1094 01:01:21,540 --> 01:01:22,700 The passion. 1095 01:01:22,940 --> 01:01:24,140 The Passion of the Christ. 1096 01:01:24,140 --> 01:01:25,340 All right. Wow. 1097 01:01:25,340 --> 01:01:27,340 Seph's an actress... sometimes. 1098 01:01:27,340 --> 01:01:28,660 Chapeau, my friend. 1099 01:01:28,780 --> 01:01:30,180 Chapeau! 1100 01:01:53,900 --> 01:01:55,140 Excuse me. 1101 01:01:55,500 --> 01:01:56,660 - Hi. - Hi. 1102 01:01:57,100 --> 01:01:58,380 - Hi. - Hi. 1103 01:02:00,580 --> 01:02:03,220 - Oh, sorry. Did you want to... - Oh, no. 1104 01:02:03,340 --> 01:02:04,740 After you. 1105 01:02:06,340 --> 01:02:07,740 Okay. 1106 01:02:17,500 --> 01:02:18,860 - All done? - Yeah. 1107 01:02:20,420 --> 01:02:21,820 Go on, love. 1108 01:02:28,540 --> 01:02:31,060 - His mum. - All right. I'm sorry. 1109 01:02:32,100 --> 01:02:33,380 I'm not. 1110 01:02:41,380 --> 01:02:42,660 Hey, guys. 1111 01:02:47,460 --> 01:02:50,220 I just got back from seeing your play, Seph. 1112 01:02:50,220 --> 01:02:51,420 Little Women. 1113 01:02:52,580 --> 01:02:53,780 Jesus. 1114 01:02:54,260 --> 01:02:55,660 It is... 1115 01:02:55,900 --> 01:03:00,300 the first time I felt relatively okay about facing imminent death. 1116 01:03:00,340 --> 01:03:03,700 It was fucking shit. 1117 01:03:04,780 --> 01:03:08,500 Yeah, and Alex was meant to meet me for dinner before... 1118 01:03:08,580 --> 01:03:11,460 but she was late so I had a pizza on my own. 1119 01:03:12,140 --> 01:03:15,540 Gonna feel pretty bad about that now, Al, aren't you? 1120 01:03:15,540 --> 01:03:16,900 Yeah. 1121 01:03:17,380 --> 01:03:18,580 You should. 1122 01:03:23,580 --> 01:03:25,460 So York's pretty nice, huh? 1123 01:03:25,620 --> 01:03:26,820 Mm-hmm. 1124 01:03:26,980 --> 01:03:28,980 It's where my dad was born... 1125 01:03:30,060 --> 01:03:34,180 and where Mum and Henry decided to get married. 1126 01:03:35,060 --> 01:03:36,420 Good one. 1127 01:03:37,380 --> 01:03:39,020 Broke his fucking heart. 1128 01:03:41,620 --> 01:03:43,020 Mum. 1129 01:03:45,420 --> 01:03:46,940 You're probably watching all of these 1130 01:03:46,940 --> 01:03:49,900 even though I've expressly told you not to. 1131 01:03:51,620 --> 01:03:52,940 You're a bitch. 1132 01:03:56,140 --> 01:03:57,420 He's dead. 1133 01:03:58,100 --> 01:03:59,420 I'm nearly dead... 1134 01:04:00,820 --> 01:04:04,260 and you're just there, pottering around, doing... 1135 01:04:05,140 --> 01:04:08,940 I don't know, whatever the fuck pointless things you do. 1136 01:04:09,900 --> 01:04:11,660 Tell me, how is that fair? 1137 01:04:12,740 --> 01:04:14,100 Huh? 1138 01:04:14,580 --> 01:04:15,980 I'm fucking... 1139 01:04:17,260 --> 01:04:18,540 I'm 29. 1140 01:04:30,380 --> 01:04:32,820 So... I had my CT today. 1141 01:04:33,300 --> 01:04:34,700 And... 1142 01:04:34,860 --> 01:04:37,660 I'm fucked. Totally. It's not working. 1143 01:04:43,700 --> 01:04:45,020 And God... 1144 01:04:45,700 --> 01:04:47,980 You know, tonight, Al, you... 1145 01:04:48,620 --> 01:04:51,420 You actually complimented me on my beanie. 1146 01:04:52,460 --> 01:04:53,620 Yeah. 1147 01:04:53,620 --> 01:04:55,020 I mean... 1148 01:04:55,220 --> 01:04:57,700 I mean, sure. I'm on trend, as usual. 1149 01:04:57,820 --> 01:04:59,100 But, fuck. 1150 01:05:06,980 --> 01:05:08,340 And... 1151 01:05:10,220 --> 01:05:11,500 I'm sorry. 1152 01:05:12,260 --> 01:05:13,500 I am sorry... 1153 01:05:14,500 --> 01:05:18,780 I'm lying to you, but, seriously, fuck you for believing me. 1154 01:05:31,260 --> 01:05:33,820 I thought I was gonna be good at dying. 1155 01:05:34,900 --> 01:05:36,580 Like, really good. 1156 01:05:36,660 --> 01:05:37,860 Like... 1157 01:05:38,060 --> 01:05:40,020 they'd project me at Ted Talks, 1158 01:05:40,020 --> 01:05:42,540 and I'd be appreciated after my time. 1159 01:05:45,380 --> 01:05:46,900 But no. Turns out... 1160 01:05:48,100 --> 01:05:49,380 I don't wanna die. 1161 01:05:50,300 --> 01:05:51,620 I love being alive. 1162 01:05:53,660 --> 01:05:55,220 Much more than you two. 1163 01:05:56,020 --> 01:05:57,420 You just... 1164 01:05:57,620 --> 01:06:00,500 fucking moan and feel sorry for yourselves. 1165 01:06:00,500 --> 01:06:04,540 You just go on and on and on and on and on, all the time. 1166 01:06:04,620 --> 01:06:06,620 It's so fucking tedious. 1167 01:06:14,140 --> 01:06:15,540 Seph. 1168 01:06:16,420 --> 01:06:18,140 You need to get your head out of your arse 1169 01:06:18,140 --> 01:06:20,260 and realize that you're not really good at acting. 1170 01:06:20,260 --> 01:06:22,820 No one will ever tell you that, so I'm doing it. 1171 01:06:22,820 --> 01:06:24,180 I don't give a fuck. 1172 01:06:24,180 --> 01:06:25,460 Do something else. 1173 01:06:26,780 --> 01:06:30,140 Alex is too polite to say anything, but I bet she agrees with me. 1174 01:06:30,140 --> 01:06:34,980 James is too fucking supportive to say anything either. 1175 01:06:35,060 --> 01:06:39,980 He's an idiot. He's a fucking patronizing idiot. 1176 01:06:43,980 --> 01:06:46,660 Yeah, and don't think you're getting off the hook... 1177 01:06:46,660 --> 01:06:48,300 Alex. No. 1178 01:06:49,380 --> 01:06:51,100 You say you're honest. 1179 01:06:52,260 --> 01:06:55,580 Yeah? You say you pride yourself on that? 1180 01:06:56,260 --> 01:06:58,660 And then you keep all these secrets. 1181 01:06:59,260 --> 01:07:00,460 Amy. 1182 01:07:00,860 --> 01:07:02,860 Has she told you about Amy yet, Seph? 1183 01:07:02,860 --> 01:07:06,020 No, probably not, even though I asked you to. 1184 01:07:06,380 --> 01:07:08,340 So fuck you if you didn't. 1185 01:07:08,860 --> 01:07:11,460 Because you should be doing what I say. 1186 01:07:13,740 --> 01:07:15,140 And you're a liar. 1187 01:07:16,780 --> 01:07:18,220 You push people away. 1188 01:07:22,420 --> 01:07:24,580 I mean, what's the point of you? 1189 01:07:26,140 --> 01:07:28,340 Either of you. What's the point? 1190 01:07:58,460 --> 01:07:59,820 Hey. 1191 01:08:01,060 --> 01:08:02,260 I'm in York. 1192 01:08:02,620 --> 01:08:03,860 Don't tell Seph. 1193 01:08:04,620 --> 01:08:05,780 Where are you? 1194 01:08:14,380 --> 01:08:17,180 Right. There's something you should know. 1195 01:08:17,580 --> 01:08:18,980 What? 1196 01:08:20,100 --> 01:08:21,580 Oh, my God, is that... 1197 01:08:25,620 --> 01:08:26,900 - Hi. - Hi. 1198 01:08:28,100 --> 01:08:31,780 - Al, do you mind giving us a minute? - Yeah, absolutely. 1199 01:08:32,780 --> 01:08:33,700 You good for a drink? 1200 01:08:33,700 --> 01:08:35,100 - Yeah. Yeah. - Cool. 1201 01:08:38,780 --> 01:08:40,100 Are you okay? 1202 01:08:41,220 --> 01:08:43,340 What the fuck is wrong with you? 1203 01:08:43,780 --> 01:08:45,260 You're unbelievable, Seph. 1204 01:08:45,260 --> 01:08:46,460 Unbelievable! 1205 01:08:47,140 --> 01:08:48,620 Okay? You lose your job, 1206 01:08:48,620 --> 01:08:51,940 which, pardon me for trying to be helpful, I got you, 1207 01:08:51,940 --> 01:08:54,140 making me look like a fucking idiot in front of my boss 1208 01:08:54,140 --> 01:08:56,460 because you're supposed to be looking after his only child, 1209 01:08:56,460 --> 01:08:58,380 and he has to tell me that you've told his wife 1210 01:08:58,380 --> 01:08:59,460 to go fuck herself... 1211 01:08:59,460 --> 01:09:01,700 and thrown a baby monitor at her? 1212 01:09:02,100 --> 01:09:04,100 And then you just take off without even telling me. 1213 01:09:04,100 --> 01:09:05,780 I've got no clue where the fuck you are, 1214 01:09:05,780 --> 01:09:07,740 apart from the fact that you're with Al somewhere. 1215 01:09:07,740 --> 01:09:12,580 And I thank God for that, because at least she picks up her fucking phone. 1216 01:09:13,180 --> 01:09:14,540 Sorry. 1217 01:09:16,980 --> 01:09:20,060 Look, and you can't just write it off as grief... 1218 01:09:20,060 --> 01:09:21,420 To being upset. 1219 01:09:21,900 --> 01:09:26,300 Other people are finding it hard too, you know? It's not just you. 1220 01:09:27,220 --> 01:09:30,500 It is possible to deal with things in a better... 1221 01:09:31,020 --> 01:09:32,500 in a less selfish way. 1222 01:09:36,340 --> 01:09:38,460 I've been so worried about you. 1223 01:09:39,100 --> 01:09:40,220 - James, I... - No. 1224 01:09:40,220 --> 01:09:42,020 Listen, you don't need me. 1225 01:09:43,820 --> 01:09:45,300 And I don't need you. 1226 01:09:51,260 --> 01:09:52,540 But I want you. 1227 01:09:53,340 --> 01:09:54,620 Seph. 1228 01:09:54,620 --> 01:09:56,220 I... I want you so much. 1229 01:09:57,140 --> 01:09:58,420 Will you marry me? 1230 01:09:59,180 --> 01:10:00,500 Jesus. Fuck. 1231 01:10:01,460 --> 01:10:02,860 Yes. 1232 01:10:03,980 --> 01:10:05,380 Yes. 1233 01:10:06,140 --> 01:10:07,500 God. 1234 01:10:08,020 --> 01:10:09,340 Oh, my God. 1235 01:10:16,180 --> 01:10:17,700 Are you sure you don't mind? 1236 01:10:17,700 --> 01:10:21,220 Of course not! I mean, you two should, you know, have a night in. 1237 01:10:21,220 --> 01:10:22,820 I mean, congratulations. 1238 01:10:22,820 --> 01:10:23,900 - Thank you. - So great! 1239 01:10:23,900 --> 01:10:25,100 What the fuck are you doing? 1240 01:10:25,100 --> 01:10:27,180 I've got to get back for a lunchtime meeting, so... 1241 01:10:27,180 --> 01:10:29,780 - I'll see you in London, okay? - Oh, yes. Yeah. 1242 01:10:29,780 --> 01:10:30,860 But, hey! 1243 01:10:30,860 --> 01:10:35,260 Chief bridesmaid, so go ahead and start buying penis straws... 1244 01:10:35,340 --> 01:10:36,780 and booking strippers... 1245 01:10:36,780 --> 01:10:39,300 - Yeah! - ...and all the classic stuff. 1246 01:10:39,340 --> 01:10:40,860 All right, then. Bye. 1247 01:10:40,940 --> 01:10:42,140 - Bye. - See ya. 1248 01:10:45,060 --> 01:10:46,420 Come on. 1249 01:10:54,580 --> 01:10:57,140 I mean, what is the point of you? 1250 01:10:57,860 --> 01:10:59,580 Seriously. Either of you. 1251 01:11:02,900 --> 01:11:04,140 What's the point? 1252 01:11:08,060 --> 01:11:09,420 You're a liar. 1253 01:11:11,300 --> 01:11:12,740 You push people away. 1254 01:11:53,860 --> 01:11:56,100 - Hi, Doug. I was just-- - Where's the other one? 1255 01:11:56,100 --> 01:11:57,420 - Who? Seph? - The actress. 1256 01:11:57,420 --> 01:11:59,740 She's... I... I don't know. I just tried to call her, but-- 1257 01:11:59,740 --> 01:12:01,180 - Damn! - What's wrong? 1258 01:12:01,180 --> 01:12:04,020 Well, it's a disaster. A fucking disaster, excuse my language. 1259 01:12:04,020 --> 01:12:05,220 What's happened? 1260 01:12:05,420 --> 01:12:07,300 Can you spare me three hours? 1261 01:12:07,300 --> 01:12:08,900 I'm desperate. Please. 1262 01:12:08,900 --> 01:12:10,620 Legally, we can't put on a performance 1263 01:12:10,620 --> 01:12:13,180 without a full dress to test out all the harnesses and so. 1264 01:12:13,180 --> 01:12:14,980 And then he hasn't showed up! 1265 01:12:14,980 --> 01:12:16,460 Who hasn't turned up? 1266 01:12:17,060 --> 01:12:18,500 We're so grateful. Thank you. 1267 01:12:18,500 --> 01:12:20,140 Right. Back in a second. 1268 01:12:20,220 --> 01:12:21,820 Sorry, where are you going? 1269 01:12:21,820 --> 01:12:23,060 Hang tight, kid. 1270 01:12:23,220 --> 01:12:24,540 What? 1271 01:12:24,540 --> 01:12:25,940 Where-- 1272 01:12:28,100 --> 01:12:29,260 Come back! 1273 01:12:35,060 --> 01:12:37,180 What on earth is going on? 1274 01:12:37,420 --> 01:12:39,380 What took you so long? 1275 01:12:39,540 --> 01:12:41,860 I mean, this is truly 1276 01:12:41,940 --> 01:12:46,300 an extraordinarily literal manifestation of your maso-complex, Al. 1277 01:12:46,300 --> 01:12:47,620 Fuck off. 1278 01:12:47,620 --> 01:12:49,580 I assume your version of the Son of God 1279 01:12:49,580 --> 01:12:51,900 is one where he's got all these weird secrets. 1280 01:12:51,900 --> 01:12:54,300 And he's secretly been shagging someone called Amy, 1281 01:12:54,300 --> 01:12:55,420 rather than Mary Magdalene. 1282 01:12:55,420 --> 01:12:57,860 Seph, seriously, you don't know what you're talking about. 1283 01:12:57,860 --> 01:12:59,180 Oh, go on, then. 1284 01:12:59,500 --> 01:13:00,860 Talk to me. 1285 01:13:01,460 --> 01:13:02,620 Talk to me! 1286 01:13:04,220 --> 01:13:07,220 Look, I'm an awful person, okay? I'm awful. 1287 01:13:07,420 --> 01:13:08,700 I'm a cock. 1288 01:13:08,700 --> 01:13:11,940 I did a rude in a toilet with a man I don't know. 1289 01:13:12,220 --> 01:13:14,900 I'm a filthy slapper, whatever. 1290 01:13:15,260 --> 01:13:17,180 Are you... Are you drinking wine? 1291 01:13:17,180 --> 01:13:18,500 Look... 1292 01:13:18,500 --> 01:13:21,340 I don't think telling James is a solution here. 1293 01:13:21,340 --> 01:13:24,020 I don't think that alleviating my guilt by telling him is-- 1294 01:13:24,020 --> 01:13:25,780 All right, yeah. Here we go. 1295 01:13:25,780 --> 01:13:26,820 I'm serious. 1296 01:13:26,820 --> 01:13:29,300 I mean, what good would it do him, actually, to know? 1297 01:13:29,300 --> 01:13:30,700 He'll know! 1298 01:13:31,180 --> 01:13:32,540 Knowing is... 1299 01:13:32,820 --> 01:13:35,180 It... It's really important, Seph. 1300 01:13:35,900 --> 01:13:38,540 If you don't know stuff, then you don't know someone. 1301 01:13:38,540 --> 01:13:39,980 - Bullshit. - He's a nice guy! 1302 01:13:39,980 --> 01:13:41,100 He's not a nice guy. 1303 01:13:41,100 --> 01:13:43,420 Oh, Seph, fuck off. He is a nice guy. 1304 01:13:43,420 --> 01:13:45,500 Okay. So he is a nice guy. 1305 01:13:45,580 --> 01:13:47,340 Yes. I think you did a bad thing, okay? 1306 01:13:47,340 --> 01:13:49,780 You did a shit thing. You're a shit. 1307 01:13:50,700 --> 01:13:53,380 But that's not the thing, okay? The sex isn't the thing. 1308 01:13:53,380 --> 01:13:54,860 But to not tell him... 1309 01:13:55,380 --> 01:13:56,980 and then agree to marry him! 1310 01:13:56,980 --> 01:13:59,940 I'm not actually going to marry him! Jesus! 1311 01:14:00,620 --> 01:14:01,780 I was just... 1312 01:14:02,420 --> 01:14:04,140 shocked by what Dan... 1313 01:14:05,300 --> 01:14:08,180 I was angry about what he said about James. 1314 01:14:08,540 --> 01:14:10,980 And I didn't want to humiliate him in the pub... 1315 01:14:10,980 --> 01:14:15,860 despite his fucking Mr. Darcy "I love you in spite of yourself" proposal. 1316 01:14:16,580 --> 01:14:18,420 I'm not gonna actually go through with it. 1317 01:14:18,420 --> 01:14:20,500 Well, then that's really shit. 1318 01:14:21,140 --> 01:14:23,380 And I think Pandora did a shit thing to me... 1319 01:14:23,380 --> 01:14:25,500 because she could have just told me she wasn't happy. 1320 01:14:25,500 --> 01:14:26,780 - Could she? - Yes, she could! 1321 01:14:26,780 --> 01:14:28,220 Of course, she could. 1322 01:14:28,540 --> 01:14:29,780 But she didn't. 1323 01:14:30,420 --> 01:14:33,220 She lied. She fucking... She fucking lied. 1324 01:14:33,700 --> 01:14:37,300 And you're doing exactly the same thing to James. You're doing... 1325 01:14:37,300 --> 01:14:39,580 And you're gonna break his heart. 1326 01:14:39,580 --> 01:14:40,940 I just can't... I can't... 1327 01:14:40,940 --> 01:14:43,820 I can't... I can't deal with people. 1328 01:14:44,740 --> 01:14:47,140 I can't deal with them... Their thoughts and their feelings 1329 01:14:47,140 --> 01:14:49,780 and their lives being all mixed up with mine. 1330 01:14:49,780 --> 01:14:51,180 Just fuck off. 1331 01:14:51,220 --> 01:14:52,340 Alex, please. 1332 01:14:52,340 --> 01:14:55,820 I'm sorry I've been such a dick, okay? I really am. 1333 01:14:56,540 --> 01:14:58,420 And I know you think I'm... 1334 01:14:58,660 --> 01:15:01,820 evil and that I'm like Pandora, but I'm really not. 1335 01:15:01,820 --> 01:15:03,220 Okay? 1336 01:15:03,220 --> 01:15:04,420 And I'm sorry. 1337 01:15:04,580 --> 01:15:06,500 I'm sorry I'm not like you. 1338 01:15:06,740 --> 01:15:10,180 I wish I was. Honestly. I really, really wish I was. 1339 01:15:10,660 --> 01:15:12,340 I wish that I had your morals. 1340 01:15:12,340 --> 01:15:13,260 But I don't. 1341 01:15:13,260 --> 01:15:14,580 I killed my sister. 1342 01:15:16,300 --> 01:15:17,660 What? 1343 01:15:18,460 --> 01:15:19,660 Amy. 1344 01:15:20,340 --> 01:15:21,700 That's who Amy is. 1345 01:15:29,420 --> 01:15:30,940 Amy got hit by a car. 1346 01:15:32,380 --> 01:15:34,140 All that stuff with Mum... 1347 01:15:34,300 --> 01:15:35,500 Me and Mum, why it's hard? 1348 01:15:35,500 --> 01:15:37,060 Well, it's that. 1349 01:15:40,380 --> 01:15:42,620 Amy got hit by a car and she died. 1350 01:15:42,780 --> 01:15:45,660 It was all because of me. Well, definitely. 1351 01:15:46,220 --> 01:15:48,460 And I told Dan once, when we were really drunk. 1352 01:15:48,460 --> 01:15:51,020 And I made him promise not to tell you. 1353 01:15:51,180 --> 01:15:52,500 Not to tell anyone. 1354 01:15:54,940 --> 01:15:56,100 I was five. 1355 01:15:57,220 --> 01:15:59,220 And she was two and a half. 1356 01:16:00,660 --> 01:16:02,100 She was really small. 1357 01:16:02,420 --> 01:16:03,780 Tiny. 1358 01:16:05,300 --> 01:16:07,300 And I was... I was making a... 1359 01:16:08,140 --> 01:16:11,060 you know, those daisy chain crown things... 1360 01:16:12,380 --> 01:16:14,580 And I... I left her to go pick some more... 1361 01:16:14,580 --> 01:16:15,660 when I shouldn't... 1362 01:16:15,660 --> 01:16:17,860 and she ran out into the front... 1363 01:16:23,700 --> 01:16:25,260 Mum and Dad split up... 1364 01:16:25,940 --> 01:16:27,540 mainly because of that. 1365 01:16:29,740 --> 01:16:31,300 It was just me and her. 1366 01:16:32,660 --> 01:16:34,660 And she was really nice most of the time... 1367 01:16:34,660 --> 01:16:38,900 but then she'd get drunk and she'd tell me it was all my fault. 1368 01:16:40,180 --> 01:16:42,460 Though she feels bad about it now. 1369 01:16:44,500 --> 01:16:49,140 We just... I just don't... I just don't really like being around her. 1370 01:16:54,140 --> 01:16:56,940 People just, they want stuff from you, you know? 1371 01:16:56,940 --> 01:16:59,700 And you can't give it to them even if you try. 1372 01:16:59,700 --> 01:17:03,060 You just end up hurting them, so there's no point. 1373 01:17:04,180 --> 01:17:08,780 I don't think you're bad or evil or whatever it is you think I think. 1374 01:17:08,980 --> 01:17:12,940 I just think you should just not be with James. 1375 01:17:13,500 --> 01:17:15,060 - You... - Al-- 1376 01:17:15,300 --> 01:17:17,500 Fuck, Dan! I swear to God. Fuck him. 1377 01:17:17,500 --> 01:17:18,700 Fuck you! 1378 01:17:24,580 --> 01:17:25,740 I'm sorry. 1379 01:17:25,940 --> 01:17:27,300 I'm sorry. 1380 01:17:27,300 --> 01:17:28,500 I'm so sorry. 1381 01:17:30,500 --> 01:17:32,020 Um... 1382 01:17:35,980 --> 01:17:38,660 And you and your mum never talk about it? 1383 01:17:38,740 --> 01:17:40,140 No. 1384 01:17:40,900 --> 01:17:42,220 What about Pandora? 1385 01:17:42,580 --> 01:17:43,980 God, no. 1386 01:17:45,620 --> 01:17:47,420 Al, you should talk to someone. 1387 01:17:47,420 --> 01:17:48,820 Yeah, I know. 1388 01:17:49,820 --> 01:17:51,220 It's just... 1389 01:17:52,100 --> 01:17:54,820 I worry about starting talking, you know? 1390 01:17:56,860 --> 01:17:58,780 What happens if you start... 1391 01:17:59,220 --> 01:18:01,580 and, I don't know, you can't stop? 1392 01:18:02,860 --> 01:18:04,540 And you just become it... 1393 01:18:05,020 --> 01:18:06,740 You... You just become... 1394 01:18:06,900 --> 01:18:08,140 all of your stuff? 1395 01:18:14,220 --> 01:18:16,260 I don't wanna talk about Amy again, okay? 1396 01:18:16,260 --> 01:18:17,420 Please. 1397 01:18:17,420 --> 01:18:18,780 Okay. 1398 01:18:19,460 --> 01:18:21,580 I'm not being a dick. I just... 1399 01:18:21,660 --> 01:18:24,060 I don't remember anything about it. 1400 01:18:26,260 --> 01:18:27,700 Just what I got told. 1401 01:18:28,700 --> 01:18:31,620 I don't have my own actual memory about it. 1402 01:18:33,980 --> 01:18:35,180 It's all right. 1403 01:18:38,140 --> 01:18:39,540 Are you okay? 1404 01:18:40,180 --> 01:18:41,580 Yeah. 1405 01:18:51,780 --> 01:18:54,580 I don't wanna scatter the last bit of Dan. 1406 01:18:54,700 --> 01:18:56,100 Me neither. 1407 01:18:58,100 --> 01:19:00,620 I don't wanna remember him right now. 1408 01:19:02,780 --> 01:19:05,020 Let's take him back to Amelia's. 1409 01:19:05,980 --> 01:19:07,340 Yeah. 1410 01:19:12,220 --> 01:19:15,460 - Are you sure you don't mind driving? - No, it's fine. 1411 01:19:15,460 --> 01:19:17,540 I'm just sorry I drank, again. 1412 01:19:17,660 --> 01:19:19,060 It's okay. 1413 01:19:19,180 --> 01:19:20,540 Let's just go home. 1414 01:19:21,540 --> 01:19:22,900 Yeah. 1415 01:19:31,980 --> 01:19:34,940 Now at least we don't have to go to Scotland. 1416 01:19:34,940 --> 01:19:36,660 Yeah. Too cold. 1417 01:19:40,300 --> 01:19:41,620 - Al. - What? 1418 01:19:42,140 --> 01:19:43,500 That's a bit weird. 1419 01:19:43,500 --> 01:19:45,380 Do you think we should stop? 1420 01:19:45,860 --> 01:19:48,140 - No. I don't-- - I'm sure it's fine. 1421 01:19:48,140 --> 01:19:50,580 - No, I don't. - She does look quite vulnerable, actually. 1422 01:19:50,580 --> 01:19:52,900 Look, we can't have this conversation in front of her. 1423 01:19:52,900 --> 01:19:54,260 Just keep driving. 1424 01:20:02,020 --> 01:20:02,980 What if it's a sign? 1425 01:20:02,980 --> 01:20:04,860 - What? - From Dan. 1426 01:20:04,860 --> 01:20:06,700 Never pick up hitchhikers. You know that. 1427 01:20:06,700 --> 01:20:10,820 Look, I really don't think Mary Poppins is going to rip us, do you? 1428 01:20:10,820 --> 01:20:13,140 What if someone dodgy picks her up? 1429 01:20:27,540 --> 01:20:28,700 Hello. 1430 01:20:29,420 --> 01:20:30,820 Hello. 1431 01:20:31,260 --> 01:20:32,540 You okay? 1432 01:20:33,700 --> 01:20:35,100 Yes. 1433 01:20:35,900 --> 01:20:37,100 I'm Seph. 1434 01:20:37,980 --> 01:20:39,420 - Sorry? - Seph. 1435 01:20:40,100 --> 01:20:41,300 Persephone. 1436 01:20:41,980 --> 01:20:43,140 Lovely name. 1437 01:20:43,220 --> 01:20:44,380 Thank you. 1438 01:20:44,380 --> 01:20:45,780 I'm Alex. 1439 01:20:45,820 --> 01:20:46,780 Alexandra? 1440 01:20:46,780 --> 01:20:47,980 Oh, just Alex. 1441 01:20:49,220 --> 01:20:51,220 Oh, sorry. I'm Diana. 1442 01:20:53,660 --> 01:20:56,260 So where is it you want to... to get to? 1443 01:20:56,260 --> 01:20:57,500 Oxnam... 1444 01:20:57,820 --> 01:20:59,180 where my son lives. 1445 01:20:59,660 --> 01:21:00,860 Okay. 1446 01:21:02,860 --> 01:21:04,140 Is that an iPhone? 1447 01:21:04,980 --> 01:21:06,420 - Yeah. - It is, yeah. 1448 01:21:06,740 --> 01:21:07,860 You got one? 1449 01:21:07,860 --> 01:21:09,460 No. I lost my phone. 1450 01:21:09,980 --> 01:21:12,300 I mean, I didn't have one. 1451 01:21:15,100 --> 01:21:16,420 So... 1452 01:21:16,420 --> 01:21:17,500 Where is Oxnam? 1453 01:21:17,500 --> 01:21:19,420 Which... Which county is it? 1454 01:21:19,940 --> 01:21:21,100 Scotland. 1455 01:21:22,580 --> 01:21:23,860 Oh, um... 1456 01:21:24,820 --> 01:21:27,900 I'm so sorry, Diana. We're going south. 1457 01:21:29,340 --> 01:21:30,660 What? 1458 01:21:30,660 --> 01:21:33,220 We're headed south. I'm so sorry. We can't take you to Scotland. 1459 01:21:33,220 --> 01:21:34,580 What? 1460 01:21:37,140 --> 01:21:39,380 Hey, look. It's okay. It's okay. 1461 01:21:39,380 --> 01:21:42,300 We need to get petrol, so just come with us. 1462 01:21:42,380 --> 01:21:46,580 We'll take you to a service station, and we'll work out what to do. 1463 01:21:56,860 --> 01:21:58,180 It's a sign. 1464 01:21:58,180 --> 01:21:59,460 What else does Dan have to do? 1465 01:21:59,460 --> 01:22:01,420 Come back from the dead wearing a fucking kilt. 1466 01:22:01,420 --> 01:22:03,100 So now you do want to go to Scotland? 1467 01:22:03,100 --> 01:22:04,780 She's... I don't know. Yeah. 1468 01:22:04,780 --> 01:22:06,180 - Yes, I do. - Alex! 1469 01:22:06,460 --> 01:22:07,700 What? 1470 01:22:07,700 --> 01:22:09,500 There's something really not right about her. 1471 01:22:09,500 --> 01:22:10,860 - Exactly. - I'm not being a dick... 1472 01:22:10,860 --> 01:22:14,020 but do you think we should try and get her sectioned? 1473 01:22:14,020 --> 01:22:15,140 What? 1474 01:22:15,140 --> 01:22:16,820 I mean, for her own good. 1475 01:22:17,540 --> 01:22:20,020 You... You can't just get someone sectioned. 1476 01:22:20,020 --> 01:22:22,340 - Why not? - Because just... You can't! 1477 01:22:22,340 --> 01:22:25,620 You don't have a fucking roving rural team of mental health specialists 1478 01:22:25,620 --> 01:22:26,620 boning around Yorkshire. 1479 01:22:26,620 --> 01:22:28,580 I'm serious. She's mad. 1480 01:22:29,140 --> 01:22:31,460 - It's worrying me. - She's not mad. 1481 01:22:31,460 --> 01:22:34,500 She's running away from someone. Seph, I think she's really frightened. 1482 01:22:34,500 --> 01:22:35,860 Yes. 1483 01:22:37,060 --> 01:22:39,580 We're going to drive you to Scotland. 1484 01:22:39,900 --> 01:22:41,300 Are... Are you sure? 1485 01:22:42,940 --> 01:22:44,140 Yes. 1486 01:22:51,980 --> 01:22:53,940 Did you laminate that, Diana? 1487 01:22:55,140 --> 01:22:58,140 Oh, yes. I thought for the rain here. 1488 01:23:00,700 --> 01:23:02,620 I'm sorry for what I said... 1489 01:23:02,660 --> 01:23:03,820 the mad business. 1490 01:23:03,820 --> 01:23:05,620 Oh, gosh. Don't be. 1491 01:23:06,540 --> 01:23:08,620 I'm sorry you were frightened. 1492 01:23:09,380 --> 01:23:11,980 I'm just not quite... myself. 1493 01:23:16,060 --> 01:23:17,820 Are either of you married? 1494 01:23:18,020 --> 01:23:19,380 - No. - No. 1495 01:23:19,780 --> 01:23:21,340 Don't you have a ring? 1496 01:23:21,500 --> 01:23:22,820 I saw it before. 1497 01:23:23,540 --> 01:23:24,900 Yeah. 1498 01:23:25,100 --> 01:23:26,300 I do. 1499 01:23:27,420 --> 01:23:28,700 I'm not sure. 1500 01:23:29,300 --> 01:23:30,660 Is he... Is he nice? 1501 01:23:31,620 --> 01:23:33,260 Yeah, he's really nice. 1502 01:23:34,340 --> 01:23:36,860 But he might be nice for someone else. 1503 01:23:38,700 --> 01:23:39,940 Where's yours? 1504 01:23:40,220 --> 01:23:41,580 Not... 1505 01:23:41,860 --> 01:23:42,940 Not nice? 1506 01:23:42,940 --> 01:23:44,380 Seph, for God's sake. 1507 01:23:44,380 --> 01:23:45,540 No, he isn't. 1508 01:23:48,940 --> 01:23:51,100 So you said your son's in Oxnam. 1509 01:23:52,580 --> 01:23:55,420 - Sorry? - Your son. You said that's where he lives. 1510 01:23:55,420 --> 01:23:56,660 Yes. 1511 01:23:56,660 --> 01:23:58,220 - He's a vet. - Right. 1512 01:23:59,780 --> 01:24:02,380 I haven't seen him for... for years. 1513 01:24:04,900 --> 01:24:06,260 His father... My... 1514 01:24:06,700 --> 01:24:08,100 He was... 1515 01:24:08,460 --> 01:24:10,940 He made him leave when he... 1516 01:24:12,060 --> 01:24:13,260 And, I didn't. 1517 01:24:15,220 --> 01:24:16,380 Daniel. 1518 01:24:16,380 --> 01:24:17,380 - What? - What? 1519 01:24:17,380 --> 01:24:18,700 That's his name. 1520 01:24:18,940 --> 01:24:20,180 Daniel. 1521 01:24:20,380 --> 01:24:21,780 Dan. 1522 01:24:25,420 --> 01:24:26,660 I need a drink. 1523 01:24:30,540 --> 01:24:32,460 What would you like to drink, Diana? 1524 01:24:32,460 --> 01:24:33,700 Oh, let me, please. 1525 01:24:33,700 --> 01:24:36,620 No, no, it's my round. What would you like? 1526 01:24:38,060 --> 01:24:39,540 A whiskey, please. 1527 01:24:40,660 --> 01:24:41,860 Some coke. 1528 01:24:42,380 --> 01:24:44,780 I'm just gonna go have a cigarette. 1529 01:24:44,860 --> 01:24:46,060 Can I come? 1530 01:24:46,420 --> 01:24:47,580 Yeah, of course. 1531 01:24:48,580 --> 01:24:49,540 Do you want one? 1532 01:24:49,540 --> 01:24:51,340 Oh, no. I don't, thank you. 1533 01:24:51,340 --> 01:24:52,700 All right. 1534 01:24:58,540 --> 01:25:00,220 Hey, have you got any cash? 1535 01:25:00,220 --> 01:25:01,180 What? 1536 01:25:01,180 --> 01:25:02,660 They don't take card. 1537 01:25:03,380 --> 01:25:04,700 Oh, here. Let me. 1538 01:25:04,740 --> 01:25:07,580 Oh, no. No. I wanted to because of, you know, before. 1539 01:25:07,580 --> 01:25:08,860 No, please. 1540 01:25:08,860 --> 01:25:11,660 And I... I want to pay you for the petrol as well. 1541 01:25:11,660 --> 01:25:13,300 I wrote it on my sign. 1542 01:25:13,540 --> 01:25:15,140 No, you don't have to-- 1543 01:25:18,380 --> 01:25:19,780 I'll pay you back. 1544 01:25:23,860 --> 01:25:25,220 Is... 1545 01:25:25,820 --> 01:25:27,540 Is that all your money? 1546 01:25:30,180 --> 01:25:31,740 You don't have a card? 1547 01:25:32,100 --> 01:25:34,020 You shouldn't be carrying around that much cash. 1548 01:25:34,020 --> 01:25:36,220 - I don't have a bank account. - Right. 1549 01:25:36,220 --> 01:25:39,220 I think he was gearing up to kill me finally. 1550 01:25:40,220 --> 01:25:41,660 Maybe I do sound mad. 1551 01:25:42,660 --> 01:25:43,820 No. 1552 01:25:45,100 --> 01:25:47,780 We'll get you to your son's. I promise. 1553 01:25:48,620 --> 01:25:49,820 It's okay. 1554 01:25:55,500 --> 01:25:57,180 It's okay. Don't worry. 1555 01:26:00,820 --> 01:26:02,740 So we just thought... 1556 01:26:02,780 --> 01:26:03,700 enough. 1557 01:26:03,700 --> 01:26:05,460 And we don't want to remember him like that. 1558 01:26:05,460 --> 01:26:06,860 Yeah. 1559 01:26:07,500 --> 01:26:08,660 But... 1560 01:26:09,100 --> 01:26:10,500 What? 1561 01:26:10,820 --> 01:26:13,100 I'm sorry. Forgive me for saying this. 1562 01:26:13,100 --> 01:26:14,740 - Yeah, that's okay. - What? 1563 01:26:14,740 --> 01:26:16,300 He's very ill... 1564 01:26:16,900 --> 01:26:19,220 this boy, your friend. He's dying. 1565 01:26:20,740 --> 01:26:21,980 He's just... 1566 01:26:22,780 --> 01:26:24,140 angry. 1567 01:26:24,500 --> 01:26:25,780 Mad. Cruel. 1568 01:26:27,020 --> 01:26:28,940 But he's not angry with you. 1569 01:26:30,580 --> 01:26:31,980 You should take him. 1570 01:26:32,660 --> 01:26:33,820 Finish it. 1571 01:26:34,740 --> 01:26:37,580 Because if you don't, you might regret it. 1572 01:26:38,100 --> 01:26:39,980 You will regret it. 1573 01:26:41,460 --> 01:26:42,780 You'll feel bad... 1574 01:26:43,420 --> 01:26:45,300 and you'll always feel bad. 1575 01:26:46,740 --> 01:26:50,100 And you'll say you'll come back here and do it... 1576 01:26:51,420 --> 01:26:52,620 but you won't. 1577 01:28:24,740 --> 01:28:26,060 You know... 1578 01:28:26,540 --> 01:28:28,060 I don't think it's... 1579 01:28:28,060 --> 01:28:30,580 Actually, I... I don't think it's... 1580 01:28:30,780 --> 01:28:32,860 Because he looks so... 1581 01:28:34,540 --> 01:28:37,900 Yes. No, no, I... I don't think it's a good idea. 1582 01:28:38,220 --> 01:28:40,140 Yes. I think it's best if I... 1583 01:28:40,140 --> 01:28:43,660 Can you take me to the nearest train station, please? 1584 01:29:18,900 --> 01:29:20,100 It's all right. 1585 01:30:26,820 --> 01:30:28,180 You okay? 1586 01:30:29,020 --> 01:30:30,180 Yeah. 1587 01:30:33,100 --> 01:30:34,700 Give me a sec, Al, yeah? 1588 01:30:45,700 --> 01:30:46,900 Hi, James. 1589 01:30:47,980 --> 01:30:49,420 No, I'm fine. 1590 01:30:50,980 --> 01:30:52,340 Listen. 1591 01:31:16,460 --> 01:31:20,820 Sorry about the last time we... met. 1592 01:31:23,220 --> 01:31:25,740 Yeah, you probably wonder why I'm keeping that in... 1593 01:31:25,740 --> 01:31:28,420 Why not just make everything nice? 1594 01:31:30,220 --> 01:31:32,620 Well, 'cause that would be bullshit. 1595 01:31:32,740 --> 01:31:34,300 You know it. I know it. 1596 01:31:35,820 --> 01:31:37,740 And that's not what this is. 1597 01:31:41,300 --> 01:31:43,500 I can be a dick, as you know. 1598 01:31:44,980 --> 01:31:47,180 And you're both awful... 1599 01:31:48,260 --> 01:31:49,460 sometimes. 1600 01:31:51,300 --> 01:31:53,460 Yeah, I mean, mostly not, but... 1601 01:31:58,300 --> 01:31:59,780 Anyways, in, uh... 1602 01:32:00,580 --> 01:32:01,740 for honesty... 1603 01:32:03,580 --> 01:32:04,740 for balance. 1604 01:32:05,260 --> 01:32:06,620 And... 1605 01:32:07,180 --> 01:32:09,980 that may not seem like the right thing to do, but... 1606 01:32:09,980 --> 01:32:11,380 there you go. 1607 01:32:17,060 --> 01:32:18,260 You... 1608 01:32:21,020 --> 01:32:22,420 You were just here. 1609 01:32:24,660 --> 01:32:25,980 Came to visit me. 1610 01:32:33,940 --> 01:32:35,340 So... 1611 01:32:36,540 --> 01:32:38,060 Ben Lomond. 1612 01:32:39,020 --> 01:32:40,380 Um... 1613 01:32:40,620 --> 01:32:42,020 Yeah. 1614 01:32:42,500 --> 01:32:44,380 I... I came here with Henry. 1615 01:32:46,740 --> 01:32:47,940 I'd not been great. 1616 01:32:47,940 --> 01:32:49,580 I was 17... 1617 01:32:49,940 --> 01:32:51,540 Sad, self-indulgent... 1618 01:32:53,140 --> 01:32:55,060 just broken up with someone. 1619 01:32:55,460 --> 01:32:58,740 Okay, fair enough, she'd just broken up with me. 1620 01:33:00,620 --> 01:33:03,780 And Henry took me on a walking holiday. 1621 01:33:05,700 --> 01:33:07,060 Um... 1622 01:33:07,980 --> 01:33:09,340 Yeah, and it was... 1623 01:33:09,620 --> 01:33:12,900 honestly, one of the best things I've ever done. 1624 01:33:15,260 --> 01:33:17,580 We were out there for about a week. 1625 01:33:18,220 --> 01:33:19,940 Yeah, I hated it at first. 1626 01:33:19,940 --> 01:33:21,940 Hated him for taking me there. 1627 01:33:22,380 --> 01:33:25,780 We had these really long, awkward walks in silence. 1628 01:33:28,780 --> 01:33:29,980 But then... 1629 01:33:31,700 --> 01:33:32,940 I don't know. 1630 01:33:34,740 --> 01:33:38,020 Well, no. I do know. I just stopped being a dick. 1631 01:33:39,220 --> 01:33:40,500 And... 1632 01:33:41,140 --> 01:33:44,140 Ben Lomond was where we went on the last day. 1633 01:33:45,660 --> 01:33:46,620 And I think... 1634 01:33:46,620 --> 01:33:50,940 it's one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen in my life. 1635 01:33:54,700 --> 01:33:56,260 Yeah, and when we got to the top, 1636 01:33:56,260 --> 01:33:59,300 I remember thinking very clearly to myself... 1637 01:34:00,780 --> 01:34:02,540 I wanna come here again... 1638 01:34:03,140 --> 01:34:07,660 and I wanna come here with someone I really love. 1639 01:34:10,740 --> 01:34:11,980 And I love you. 1640 01:34:17,460 --> 01:34:19,500 Oh, and please... 1641 01:34:20,460 --> 01:34:23,700 can you make sure you keep a bit of me... 1642 01:34:24,380 --> 01:34:25,780 for Mum and Henry? 1643 01:34:28,940 --> 01:34:30,300 For Mum. 1644 01:34:33,820 --> 01:34:35,180 Mum... 1645 01:34:37,260 --> 01:34:38,540 I'm really sorry. 1646 01:34:39,940 --> 01:34:41,340 I really, really am. 1647 01:34:45,140 --> 01:34:48,100 You were here this morning with Henry and... 1648 01:34:50,700 --> 01:34:54,220 Oh, fuck. We can't do it, can we? We just can't... 1649 01:34:55,260 --> 01:34:56,420 talk. 1650 01:34:56,780 --> 01:34:58,060 I can't, anyway. 1651 01:35:01,220 --> 01:35:04,340 And I tried just now and, like, I really did... 1652 01:35:05,500 --> 01:35:10,580 but I just can't put my heart in my mouth and say all the stuff... 1653 01:35:12,060 --> 01:35:13,740 And now there's no time. 1654 01:35:17,100 --> 01:35:19,900 But, look. Despite everything, just... 1655 01:35:21,220 --> 01:35:23,700 know that I love you. 1656 01:35:24,500 --> 01:35:26,260 Please, just know that... 1657 01:35:28,020 --> 01:35:31,660 because I don't know if I'm gonna be able to say it... 1658 01:35:31,660 --> 01:35:34,180 live, as it were. 1659 01:35:37,100 --> 01:35:39,140 You two, please make sure my mum watches this. 1660 01:35:39,140 --> 01:35:43,260 She probably has, but just in case she found the last one hard or whatever, 1661 01:35:43,260 --> 01:35:44,900 just make sure she does. 1662 01:35:55,180 --> 01:35:56,380 Okay. 1663 01:35:58,780 --> 01:35:59,980 Bye, Mum. 1664 01:36:01,820 --> 01:36:03,100 Bye, Henry. 1665 01:36:05,340 --> 01:36:06,700 Bye, you two. 1666 01:36:08,740 --> 01:36:10,060 Bye, everyone. 1667 01:36:11,980 --> 01:36:13,180 I love you. 1668 01:36:30,020 --> 01:36:31,300 Oh, and... 1669 01:36:32,380 --> 01:36:34,460 watch out for false summits. 1670 01:36:35,140 --> 01:36:36,500 There's a few. 1671 01:36:36,940 --> 01:36:38,620 - Hi. Good morning. - Hey. 1672 01:36:44,220 --> 01:36:45,580 Does that look... 1673 01:36:46,500 --> 01:36:48,060 a little higher to you? 1674 01:36:48,860 --> 01:36:50,180 Shit. 1675 01:36:52,220 --> 01:36:53,380 Shit! 1676 01:36:54,020 --> 01:36:55,660 Try not to fuck it up... 1677 01:36:58,180 --> 01:36:59,980 but don't worry if you do. 116591