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.
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00:00:01,160 --> 00:00:08,960
# What'll I do when you are far away
3
00:00:09,960 --> 00:00:16,800
# And I am blue, what'll I do
4
00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:25,960
# When I'm alone
with only dreams of you
5
00:00:25,960 --> 00:00:32,960
# That won't come
true what'll I do #
6
00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:42,960
I was right.
They were all up in your room.
7
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Not this one.
8
00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,960
Dorian was using this
to soak her dentures.
9
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:50,960
Oh, I forgot about them.
10
00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:52,800
I bought this lot to
replace that lot.
11
00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:54,960
No wonder there's never
anything ever to drink out of.
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00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:58,960
I'll go get the cereal bowls.
Good boy, Travis.
13
00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:01,960
See I do my share.
You get him to, you mean.
14
00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:03,960
It's called delegating, Trace!
15
00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:06,960
If you're making a cup of tea,
I'll have one.
16
00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:08,960
Is there any Battenburg left?
17
00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:10,960
No, but there's enough
penicillin in this mug,
18
00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:13,960
to cure Dorien of whatever
she's caught this week.
19
00:01:15,960 --> 00:01:18,960
Don't worry, Dor. I put
your gnashers under your pillow.
20
00:01:20,960 --> 00:01:25,000
You can expect a visit tonight from
a platoon of toothfairies.
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00:01:25,960 --> 00:01:28,960
I have no idea what you're
talking about Sharon,
22
00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:30,960
absolutely no desire to learn.
23
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:36,960
Your publisher didn't like
your new book? No. He didn't.
24
00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:41,000
He said 80 Shades of Ecstasy
was more like 70 Yards of Yawn.
25
00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:45,960
But what should I expect from that
brainless ungrateful timeserver?
26
00:01:45,960 --> 00:01:48,960
"Oh, we didn't like this bit.
Oh, we didn't like that bit..."
27
00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:52,480
What a nerve. Insulting your bits!
28
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So, basically the new one's
not dirty enough?
29
00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:06,960
Exactly. And it's all
your fault, Tracey!
30
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:10,960
My fault? Since living here,
I have had fewer steamy encounters
31
00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:12,960
than Sharon's had paid jobs.
32
00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:17,960
I mean I can hardly invite
a gentleman caller
33
00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:22,960
back to this temple
of bourgeois repression, can I?
34
00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:24,960
What's that suppose to mean?
35
00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:28,960
I think she's trying to say,
you're cramping her style, Trace.
36
00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:31,960
No, I'm not. I just don't want
any more of your geriatric
37
00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:33,960
hanky panky in my house.
38
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:37,960
Look you just need to be
more creative, Dor.
39
00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,960
For example...
40
00:02:39,960 --> 00:02:41,960
I did it once...
41
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:43,960
in a skip behind Screwfix.
42
00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:50,960
Ladies and gentlemen,
dinner is served!
43
00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:52,960
It's not that
liver supreme again, is it? No.
44
00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,960
It's Brains au Gratin!
45
00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:58,960
Oh, lovely!
I'm not having any of that!
46
00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:00,960
Oh, of course not.
47
00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:03,960
The last thing anyone needs
in this house is more brains!
48
00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:07,960
It was a Chef's Special but
for some reason nobody ordered it.
49
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:10,960
Oh, I like the jacket, mate.
50
00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:12,960
What this old thing?
51
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:17,480
Don't you think you should
give your mum some housekeeping
52
00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:19,160
before you go
splashing out on yourself?
53
00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:20,960
That's rich coming from you, Sharon.
54
00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:23,960
Well, as it happens...
here you go, Mum.
55
00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:25,960
Oh, thanks, love.
56
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,960
You robbed a bank?
Well, it does run in the family.
57
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:31,960
I got paid!
(DOORBELL RINGS)
58
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:33,960
Who's that?
59
00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:39,800
Yeah?
60
00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:40,960
We're looking for
a Mr Garth Stubbs.
61
00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:42,960
It's the Old Bill!
Quick, you've got to hide.
62
00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:47,640
I haven't done anything! They don't
do courtesy calls. Get in there!
63
00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:49,960
You two, act natural.
64
00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:01,640
(SIGHS)
65
00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:03,960
It's upside down, Dor.
66
00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:06,960
(WHISTLES SOFTLY)
67
00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:11,480
Where's Garthy?
Who?
68
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:14,960
It's all right, Shal.
The Old Bill have gone.
69
00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:17,960
What's he done?
(SIGHS)
70
00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:20,800
Nothing.
I told you!
71
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:31,960
What did the police want then?
72
00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:33,960
Boys, you better come and sit down.
73
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:35,960
Ooh, that sounds ominous.
74
00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:42,320
It's about your dad.
75
00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:43,960
What's he done now?
76
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:45,960
He's had an accident.
77
00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:49,960
He fell through
a warehouse roof in Wrexham.
78
00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:54,160
Oh! I mean, it's bad enough
79
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:56,960
they make people work
for minimum wage,
80
00:04:56,960 --> 00:04:59,960
without sending them up
on unsafe roofs.
81
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:02,960
Haven't they ever heard
of health and safety in Wales?
82
00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:04,960
He was breaking in!
83
00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:10,960
Well, there's a surprise (!)
84
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:13,960
Where is he now? Can we see him?
Well...
85
00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:15,960
that's the thing, innit.
86
00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:17,960
What's the thing?
87
00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:21,960
Oh, my God, Tracy, he isn't?
88
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:25,960
Oh, Tracy, I'm so sorry.
89
00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:28,960
Well, why were the police
asking for Garth?
90
00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:31,960
He's the next of kin.
91
00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:34,960
Aren't you the next of kin?
Not since the divorce.
92
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,960
What the bloody hell
was he doing up on that roof?
93
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:39,320
He never had a head for heights!
94
00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:42,960
Well, he did lead that roof top
protest at Strangeways.
95
00:05:43,960 --> 00:05:45,960
That was after he nicked
a bottle of tranquilisers
96
00:05:45,960 --> 00:05:47,960
from the prison dispensary.
97
00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:50,960
Suddenly, I'm living
with the Sopranos.
98
00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:54,960
He should have known.
Crime's a young man's game
99
00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:57,640
You go running around on
roof tops sooner or later
100
00:05:57,640 --> 00:05:59,480
something's gotta give.
Well - Uh.
101
00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:03,960
I knew this would happen one day.
102
00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:08,960
Right, why don't we all
have a nice cup of tea, eh?
103
00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:11,960
Well, I think we need
something stronger than that.
104
00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:14,960
You all right, boys?
105
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:18,960
What's he doing robbing
warehouses at his age anyway?
106
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:19,960
Loser.
107
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,960
Hold on, that's our dad
you're rubbishing.
108
00:06:23,640 --> 00:06:26,960
Look, I know you loved him,
mate, but I only met him five times.
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00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:29,960
And four of them I needed
a prison visiting order.
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00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:33,960
Look, he might have been a dad
to you, but he wasn't a dad to me.
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00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:40,960
What are we going to do
about a funeral?
112
00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:43,960
It's nothing to do with us.
How can you say that?
113
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,000
We split up 15 years ago.
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00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:48,960
Your dad had made
a new life for himself...
115
00:06:48,960 --> 00:06:50,160
and we weren't part of it.
116
00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:53,960
But Mum!
You gotta do something, Trace.
117
00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:55,960
Darryl loved you.
118
00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:58,960
Everything he did, he did for you.
119
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:01,960
Wasn't that the theme song from
Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves?
120
00:07:04,960 --> 00:07:07,480
Just asking.
121
00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:10,960
Everything he did was at
the end of a sawn off shotgun.
122
00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:12,960
He never gave me anything legitimate.
123
00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:15,960
Oh, that's nice (!)
Yeah, cheers for that, Mum (!)
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Except for you and your brother.
125
00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:19,960
Look...
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00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:24,480
I know you're angry, Tracey,
but you still need some closure.
127
00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:27,960
If it helps,
I've seen a little black dress
128
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:30,960
that's crying out
for an occasion like this.
129
00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:32,960
I'm not buying a little black dress.
130
00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:34,960
No, not for you, for me!
131
00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:53,960
What?
132
00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:56,960
If you find half a chicken
doner down there, it's mine.
133
00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:58,960
It's in the bin.
134
00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:05,960
Oi! I was going to have that while
I was watching Saturday Kitchen.
135
00:08:05,960 --> 00:08:07,960
Look, I know that you're
trying to cheer me up.
136
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:09,960
No, I ain't.
I really was gonna have it
137
00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:11,960
while I was watchin'
Saturday Kitchen.
138
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:13,960
Look, I just want all this
to be over.
139
00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:18,000
I know.
Look, sit down a minute, Trace.
140
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:24,960
Look, I popped into
some funeral places on the way home.
141
00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:26,960
I know you mean well,
but all this does
142
00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:29,960
is remind me of when I was
a gangster's moll for 25 years
143
00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:31,960
and never even knew.
144
00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:33,960
At least Darryl looked after you.
145
00:08:35,960 --> 00:08:37,960
Gave you a beautiful house.
146
00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,960
Smashing' kids, lovely jewellery.
147
00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:43,960
I was married to a bank robber too.
148
00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:47,480
All Chris ever gave me was herpes.
149
00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:54,960
And I don't even like Greek food.
150
00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:58,960
Liar!
151
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:03,000
Look, Trace. There's
lots of good deals going on.
152
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,960
I mean, one of them
does a buy one get one free.
153
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,960
And Dorien ain't
gettin' any younger.
154
00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:14,960
(OOORBELL RINGS)
155
00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:16,480
GARTH: I'll get it.
156
00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,960
Unless you want me to
hide in the cupboard again?
157
00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:24,960
Stick these in some water son
and I wouldn't say no to a cuppa.
158
00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:28,320
Three sugars.
It's been a helluva shock.
159
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:32,320
Tracey, I just heard.
160
00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:33,960
What a tragedy.
161
00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:36,960
That could easily have
been me up there on that roof.
162
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,960
Sharon, what can I say?
163
00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:42,960
You can say what you're doing
here and then you can say good-bye.
164
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:45,960
How did you hear, Len?
You joking?
165
00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:49,160
It's the sole topic of conversation
in every snooker hall in Romford.
166
00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:50,960
Sad day.
167
00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:53,480
We're going to give him
a good send off though.
168
00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:55,960
Suit yourself. If you want
to trek all the way to Wrexham.
169
00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:58,960
Wrexham? Nobody's going to Wrexham.
170
00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:01,960
He's got to be buried
down 'ere, among his own people.
171
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:04,960
You expect me to pay
for a big East End funeral,
172
00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:07,000
for a man who let me
down time after time?
173
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:10,960
You don't have to worry your pretty
little head about the wedge, Trace.
174
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:12,960
The lads'll pay for everything.
175
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:13,960
Out of the goodness of their hearts?
176
00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:16,960
He was one of their own.
All you got to do is decide
177
00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:19,960
what sort of funeral you want.
178
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:22,960
Well, that's very
generous of you, Lenny.
179
00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:25,960
Look, there's plenty of options.
180
00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:31,800
You can have him buried or
cremated, religious or humanist.
181
00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:36,160
You can even have a holistic
pagan funeral in Epping Forest.
182
00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:39,000
As far as I'm concerned,
you can have him stuffed.
183
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,960
Do they do that as well?
184
00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:44,960
Not in the Co-op, no.
185
00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:47,960
Excuse us.
186
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:52,960
Look, Trace, this funeral
ain't gonna cost you a penny.
187
00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:55,960
And it's only right that your boys
say a proper good-bye to their dad.
188
00:10:57,800 --> 00:10:59,640
(LENGTHY SIGH)
189
00:10:59,640 --> 00:11:01,960
All right, we'll have the funeral.
190
00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:03,960
But I don't want to
be beholden to you, Lenny.
191
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:07,480
So make sure you keep it
dignified, short and cheap.
192
00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:12,960
What do you think?
193
00:11:12,960 --> 00:11:15,800
Well, two out of three ain't bad.
194
00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:33,960
A good turnout, eh?
195
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,960
Every dodgy geezer in
East London by the look of it.
196
00:11:40,960 --> 00:11:45,000
Sad day, sad day.
197
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,960
You look tasty, Shal.
198
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,960
There's a time and a place, Lenny.
199
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,960
Yeah? You tell me where and when!
200
00:11:57,960 --> 00:11:59,000
Who are all those people?
201
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:01,960
The Don Corleone
Appreciation Society?
202
00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:05,960
Although that one
is strangely attractive,
203
00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:07,960
in a wolfish kind of way.
204
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:10,960
Is that a gun in his pocket, or -
205
00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:12,960
It's a gun. Keep walking.
206
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:16,960
They're not all gangsters, are they?
207
00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:19,480
No, the one in
the long frock is a vicar.
208
00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:21,640
(HORSES NEIGH)
209
00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:43,960
It's what he would have wanted.
210
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:45,960
.
211
00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:48,960
.
212
00:12:55,320 --> 00:12:57,960
Come on then, bruv.
What?
213
00:12:57,960 --> 00:13:00,960
Well, we've gotta help carry Dad.
214
00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:03,000
Well, I can't!
Don't be such a wuss.
215
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,960
But he's...dead.
216
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:08,960
You kind of have to be
to get into a coffin.
217
00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:12,960
We want to help.
218
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:16,960
No need, son. We're all
experts at manhandling corpses.
219
00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:20,640
LOL.
220
00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:22,320
Well, in that case...
No.
221
00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:24,640
It's our duty.
222
00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:27,960
(CLEARS THROAT)
223
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:33,160
Come on, Trace.
We should be going in now.
224
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:37,960
Hold on. That's Barry bloody Farmer!
225
00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:42,960
I don't remember
inviting the Old Bill.
226
00:13:42,960 --> 00:13:45,960
Just paying my respects. I'm very
sorry for your loss, Mrs Stubbs.
227
00:13:45,960 --> 00:13:47,960
Don't give me that cobblers.
228
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:49,960
You been taking pictures
of Darryl's mates, ain't you?
229
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:51,960
I'm checking to see
who's crawled out
230
00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,960
from their respective stones.
231
00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:56,480
You got a nerve. And to think
that I actually used to like you.
232
00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:00,800
Come on.
Let's get it over with.
233
00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:05,960
I'll wait here.
234
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,320
Funerals make me nervous.
235
00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:09,960
Yeah, well, they would, at your age.
236
00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:19,640
I'd like to thank you all
for coming to this sad occasion.
237
00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:22,960
Certainly is a terrific turnout.
238
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:28,800
Let us begin by singing our
first hymn: 'Tis a folly and a Crime.
239
00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:39,960
All: # Oh 'tis a folly and a crime
240
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:45,960
# To put religion by...
241
00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:50,960
Dorien.
242
00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:54,960
Vince.
Hello, Vince.
243
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:57,960
Do funerals make you nervous too?
244
00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:01,960
No, just bored.
You know, I've been to so many.
245
00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:04,960
Have I seen you somewhere?
246
00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:06,960
It's entirely possible.
247
00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:10,800
Yeah, I saw your photofit up on the
board at Hainault nick, didn't I?
248
00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,960
You most certainly did not!
249
00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:15,800
I'm an internationally
acclaimed novelist.
250
00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:19,960
Perhaps you've read
60 Shades of Green?
251
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,960
Can't read.
252
00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:23,960
Quaint.
253
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:25,960
But I've heard it.
You mean, you've heard of it.
254
00:15:25,960 --> 00:15:28,800
No, don't tell me what I mean, love.
255
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:30,960
My cellmate used to read
out all the best bits
256
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:34,160
if I gave him, lend him a phonecard.
257
00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:38,960
So, erm...did all them
things really happen to you?
258
00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:41,960
All them things and more.
259
00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:45,960
You writing another one?
260
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:47,960
I've almost finished one actually.
261
00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:51,960
Just needs a little
more cut and thrust.
262
00:15:55,960 --> 00:15:58,960
Darryl was one of the best.
263
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:03,800
I'm not saying that
he never bent the rules,
264
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:06,320
but like it says in the Good Book,
265
00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:11,960
"Let he who is without sin
cast the first stone."
266
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,480
Well, Darryl did
cast the first stone...
267
00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:20,960
..when he led that protest
on the roof of Strangeways.
268
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:27,960
To be completely honest,
Darryl cast the first tile.
269
00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:33,960
He got three months loss of
privileges for that,
270
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:38,960
but the rest of the rioters ended
up with tellies in their cells.
271
00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:44,960
And I know you've
always been very grateful.
272
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,960
(CONGREGATION AGREES)
273
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:52,960
You're having a giraffe.
I couldn't, not in there!
274
00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:57,960
What a big strong man like you?
275
00:16:57,960 --> 00:16:59,960
What are you afraid of? Ghosts?
276
00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:02,960
No, it just doesn't
seem right, does it?
277
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:06,960
Well, of course it's not right,
that's what makes it so thrilling!
278
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:08,960
How many people have
coupled in the back of a hearse
279
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:11,960
and lived to tell the tale?
280
00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:14,960
But if you don't want to
feature in the climactic passage
281
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:18,320
of Foxy Cohen's next bonk-buster...?
282
00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:24,960
Well, if you put it like that...
283
00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:34,960
Dorien: Oh, my God, it is a gun!
284
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:36,960
Vince: Oi, oi, oi. Careful!
285
00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:38,960
(GUNSHOT AND HORSES NEIGH)
286
00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:47,160
I gave Darryl Stubbs
the best years of my life
287
00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:49,960
and for most of that time,
I had no idea that he was
288
00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:51,960
in the same line of
business as you lot.
289
00:17:54,960 --> 00:17:57,800
I was at school when Darryl
first asked me for a date.
290
00:17:57,800 --> 00:18:00,960
I jumped at it. He was the most
handsomest boy in the class
291
00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:03,960
with the nicest smile.
292
00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:06,960
And he had a car.
A different one every week.
293
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:13,960
I was still a girl when we met,
but in his hands, I became a woman.
294
00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:15,960
I'll never forget
the night he showed me...
295
00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:20,960
..how to do a handbrake turn.
296
00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:27,960
He wasn't perfect, far
from it, but he was a good dad,
297
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:31,960
a good provider
and the only man I ever loved.
298
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:33,960
CONGREGATION: Ah...
299
00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:43,960
Oh, my God!
300
00:18:47,480 --> 00:18:50,960
(ORGAN PLAYS UP WHERE WE BELONG)
301
00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,960
Mum, where's the hearse?
302
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:04,800
Dad's getting really heavy.
303
00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:07,960
OK, which one of you
jokers have nicked the hearse?
304
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:09,960
Leave off, Trace,
we never steal from our own.
305
00:19:09,960 --> 00:19:11,960
(HORSES WHINNY)
306
00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:17,960
Whoa!
307
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,640
Where the hell have you been?
308
00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:27,960
Walthamstow.
309
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:30,800
(ALL LAUGH)
310
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:31,960
All right, Vincey?
311
00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:33,960
All: Hey!
312
00:19:35,640 --> 00:19:37,480
Ride of my life.
313
00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:48,960
All right, lads,
all right, lads. Load him up.
314
00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:52,960
But I can't hold it!
315
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:07,960
How many legs did your husband
actually have, Mrs Stubbs?
316
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:10,800
Lenny!
317
00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:12,960
Guys!
318
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:14,960
Oi, you lot!
319
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:25,640
Dignified enough for you, Tracey?
320
00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:27,800
(SICILIAN HEART TUNE)
321
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:36,960
Well, at least you got a chance
322
00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:38,960
to tell everyone
how much you loved Darryl.
323
00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:41,960
Well, of course I loved him. That's
why I'm so bloody angry with him.
324
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:43,960
That's the irony of love, isn't it?
325
00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:46,960
Did you hear something, Sharon?
326
00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:48,960
Are you still not talking to me?
327
00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:52,640
There it goes again.
You can't blame me, Tracey.
328
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:55,960
When a research opportunity
like that presents itself,
329
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:58,800
you have to grasp
it with both hands.
330
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:04,960
Hang about,
where's me sideboard gone?
331
00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:07,160
Garth: Uh, Mum?
What?
332
00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:14,960
Oh, my God!
333
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:18,640
I reckon we've been burgled.
334
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:22,960
Well done, Sherlock (!)
335
00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:25,640
But this must've taken hours!
336
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:27,960
Well, they had hours, didn't they?
337
00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:29,960
Who knew we'd be out all day?
338
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:32,960
Every lowlife around,
thanks to you and your mate Lenny!
339
00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:38,160
And they try to tell you
that Essex is on the way up.
340
00:21:43,320 --> 00:21:45,480
subtitles by Deluxe
341
00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:11,960
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