Original subtitles

[triumphant music]

Downloaded from YTS.MX

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

[gentle music]

[man sighs]

- [Marie] Can I tell you something in confidence?

I find my husband so goddamned irritating

that I'm planning to leave him.

And that's a fact.

[gentle music]

[typewriter clatters]

♪ You can dance

♪ You can make me laugh

[dog barking]

♪ You got X-ray eyes

♪ You know how to sing

♪ You're a diplomat

♪ You got it all

♪ Everybody loves you ♪ [typewriter crashes]

♪ You can charm the birds ♪

♪ Out of the sky, but I, I've got one thing ♪

[dog barking]

♪ You have always known just what to say ♪

♪ And when to go

♪ But I've got one thing

♪ You can see in the dark ♪

♪ But I've got one thing

[garbage crunching]

♪ I loved you better

[upbeat music]

[garbage clattering]

♪ Send it up, watch it rise, see it fall ♪

♪ Gravity's rainbow

♪ Send it up, watch it rise, see it fall ♪

♪ Gravity's angel

- [Radio Host] Well, good morning.

It's 7:00 a.m., and it's gonna be another really hot day.

Sorry, folks, but we're gonna have some showers too,

I'm afraid, so bring your umbrellas.

- Let's begin at the beginning.

[radio host laughs]

Yesterday afternoon, I was sitting in the kitchen,

quietly reading a magazine,

when my fucking pig of a husband suddenly came in

and asked me where his goddamned, horrible,

piece of shit, 200-year-old typewriter was.

I threw your typewriter out,

you goddamned, fucking, incredible pig.

I threw it out because it makes too much noise.

"Get yourself a nice, little computer

that doesn't make any noise," I told him.

You goddamned son of a bitch.

You idiot. You shit.

Get yourself a nice, little computer

that doesn't make any noise,

you worthless piece of cock-sucking turd.

[Bruce snoring]

[Marie sighs]

I'll tell you, frankly, I'm fed up with this asshole.

I've had it up to here,

and I'm gonna fucking well leave him

and see how he likes it.

Do you hear me?

I hate my life with you.

Don't you get it? I hate it!

- Oh.

Oh.

Oh, hello, darling.

- No.

- Is it time to get up? - No, no.

Oh, god, please.

Don't wake up.

Ugh, look at you.

Do you have to just lie there in a disgusting heap?

If you're gonna get up

and start wrecking my whole fucking day,

would you please get out of bed

and get some of that filth out of the sink

and make me some breakfast?

Now.

Now! Now!

I said now!

[refrigerator door opens]

[gentle music]

[refrigerator door closes]

It was a miserable summer.

It was hot.

We didn't have jobs.

We were running out of money.

We didn't have anything to read that was good.

It was all worthless shit.

I had the flu the whole time.

[Marie sighs]

[dog barking]

- [Bruce] So, darling, I found some rolls.

[knife clattering]

- Great. [car horn honking]

Just great.

What happens now, eh, honey?

- They were saying- - Eh, honey?

Eh, honey? What happens now, eh, honey?!

- Well, actually, darling,

I've been planning to leave rather early today.

You see, Roger and I thought we might have

a quick lunch together. - Oh, wow.

Lunch with Roger. Wow, the world's most fascinating person.

Boy, I wish I could be around for that lunch.

Ooh. Gosh.

Wow.

Lunch with Roger.

Jesus, think he'll tell you some of those great ideas

he has about disposable sewage in the 19th century?

[gentle music]

Ooh, boy, Roger.

What a brain he has. Oh, god.

I love to listen to Roger when he gets into his groove.

Do you know what I mean?

Just so enlightening to hear his ideas come crawling

right out of his very own mouth.

Oh, god. Roger, he's really great.

- Darling, I really think I'd better get ready

to meet Roger now because-

- You know, I am just the teeniest bit jealous

to think that you went ahead and made plans

with my favorite person,

just leaving me here at home

to think about all the marvelous insights

I won't be hearing.

But I forgive you because I know you men need time alone

just to suck each other off in your own little way.

- But you won't mind, will you, my love,

if I just shave a bit and brush my teeth now?

You didn't need to use the bathroom, did you?

Am I getting in your way?

- Why, no, not at all.

Getting in my way?

As if that could happen.

[Marie laughs]

You get in my way? What a funny idea.

Oh, god.

You are really funny.

- All right, then, darling.

I'll see you in a moment.

[Marie sighs]

- When I told him about the typewriter,

he went downstairs, and he looked in the street.

And he looked, and he looked,

but he couldn't find his filthy, little machine.

So then he came upstairs in his torn, little sweater,

and he put his head on my chest, and he cried.

And he cried, and he cried, and he cried, and he cried,

and finally, I thought, "Well, I really have to leave you."

[Bruce sobbing]

"I mean, you're a fine, little man.

You're not a bad, little man,

but, I mean, I really have to leave you,

and I really have to leave you,

and there's really nothing else to say."

And that's when I decided I had to leave him.

[elegant piano music]

- [Bruce] Hi, darling.

- Hi, Bruce.

[dishware clattering]

- Do you think we should throw out this coffee,

or keep it one more day?

- Oh, I don't know, Bruce.

What would you say about it?

Let's hear your opinion.

Keep it for a day, or just toss it out?

- Well, why don't I make you a fresh pot right now,

just so you'll have some?

- Oh, why, Bruce, how thoughtful.

I didn't know you were a saint.

That's really just terrific.

You make a perfect saint.

- Oh. Well, thank you, darling.

I'll just do this quickly. [filter tapping]

[Marie sniffing]

[Marie sighs]

[Marie sniffing]

- Bruce, darling, I think I can smell something, dear.

I think I can smell urine, sweetheart.

I think your trousers have urine on them, dear.

Do you think you should change them?

- Darling, I'm trying to concentrate

on making this coffee.

Is that all right with you, sweetheart?

Please don't disturb me.

- But, Bruce, sweetheart,

your trousers have urine on them today, dear.

I think they should be changed, don't you?

- I'm doing my best, darling.

I'm doing my best, simply the best that I can.

Simply my best.

Simply the best that I can.

Now, these are not the trousers that I'm planning to wear.

I'm planning to change them, but I need my concentration.

I need to pay attention to the thing that I'm doing.

Do you follow me, darling?

- Yes, Bruce, I think I do, dear. I think I do, dearest.

[dial clicks] [flame roars]

We had arranged to go to Frank's for a party that evening.

Frank was a friend.

I wanted to stay home.

I had to talk to Bruce.

You know, Bruce, sweetheart,

do you think we really need to go

to Frank's tonight, darling?

Why don't we just stay home for the evening?

I need to talk to you, sweetheart.

It's been so long since we've talked.

I really have to talk to you about various things.

- Well, darling, I know we haven't had much

of a talk in a very long while, and that would be so nice,

but, you know, I just don't see how we can avoid going

over to Frank's at this point,really.

- But, Bruce, do we really need to go?

- Well, darling, he's invited us.

And as a matter of fact,

I really don't feel like going there at all,

but I think we just have to.

I mean, he did invite us, and we said we would go there.

We said we would go there, so at this point,

I just don't see how we can avoid going there now, you see?

But the thing is, we can just stay briefly,

and then we can have dinner someplace pleasant,

and we can talk all we like.

Now, doesn't that sound nice?

- Well, all right, Bruce.

Whatever you want.

Shall I meet you at Frank's,then?

- Oh, yes. Why don't you, darling?

Why don't you just meet me there?

And then afterwards, we'll go someplace nice,

and we'll have a bite to eat,

and then we can just talk all we like.

Now, is that all right, darling?

I love you, sweetheart.

Goodbye, darling.

Coffee's almost ready.

- Goodbye, Bruce.

- Goodbye, darling.

[door closes]

- [Marie] I was tired.

I was sick.

I had thrown out his typewriter,

and now I planned to leave him.

[gentle music]

It would be awful to tell him,

awful to finally kill the life we'd had together,

taking my things out of these rooms

which had once seemed so nice,

but then it would be over with, and everything would change.

I'd leave the apartment, the neighborhood, the street.

[upbeat music]

[shower running]

[gentle music]

♪ Maybe doesn't make me hot ♪

♪ Maybe doesn't burn me up ♪

♪ Maybe doesn't make me sigh ♪

♪ Maybe makes me wonder why ♪

♪ Maybe I'm in love with you ♪

♪ Maybe I could love him too ♪

♪ If you don't know what to say ♪

[patrons chattering]

- God, you're looking fabulous.

- Well, thank you.

Thanks. You too.

- No, no, but, really,

that jacket is completely new, isn't it?

- Well, I have to admit that it is.

Something happened to the gray one, you know.

I'm not sure.

I think it was because I was leaning up

against this green wall in this new place that...

You know, there's this new place, in my neighborhood,

where you can get these just amazing quantities

of vegetables very, very cheaply.

But the thing is, you have to be willing

to get really a lot of the same vegetable.

I mean, you know, they'll sell you a bag of cauliflower

that's about, you know, [laughs] this big.

And, you know, I...

It's just exciting.

♪ Yes, I do ♪

[gentle music]

[Marie sighs]

♪ Yes is smart, yes makes me laugh ♪

♪ Yes says, baby, be right back ♪

♪ Maybe isn't calm and cool ♪

♪ Maybe better stay in school ♪

♪ If you don't know what to do ♪

♪ Maybe it's goodbye to you ♪

♪ Yes is funny, yes is rich ♪ [thunder rumbles]

I mean, you know, by that time,

nearly every country in Europe had a municipal department

specifically directed toward the construction

of enormous tunnels underneath the street.

Massive tunnels.

I mean, they'd figured out this was one municipal problem

that was never gonna go away.

Massive tunnels in Rome and Paris.

Anyway, that very same year,

you suddenly find a Bavarian public works commissioner,

one Klaus Kretz, coming up with a rather novel idea.

Now, I'm absolutely serious, because his memo is legendary.

I think you can actually still see it framed

in the Museum of Municipal Affairs.

Anyway, this Kretz was working as a merchant marine

long before he worked in the municipal government,

and he'd been to India, and he wrote this memo which said,

you know, "When I was in the Indian city of Bangalore

during my stint as a merchant marine,

I happened to notice the streets were filled

with these rather enormous, terribly well-fed pigs."

[both laughing]

- No.

[both chuckling]

[siren wailing]

[dog barking]

[Marie sighs]

♪ Maybe doesn't turn me on ♪

♪ Maybe's not filet mignon ♪

♪ If your answer's I don't know ♪

♪ Maybe I will let you go ♪

♪ Yes is tender, yes is true ♪

♪ Yes says, baby, I love you ♪

♪ Yes, I do ♪

[dishware clattering]

[patrons chattering]

- Hey, you remember Bradley Congress, don't you?

- Sorta thin guy- - Used to be

Bill van Veen's roommate?

- Yes. - Well, this is unbelievable.

He's working for Thorpe now.

- Really? - It's incredible.

So I called Thorpe the other day,

and this rather officious guy says, "He isn't in,"

and "Is there anything I can do for you?"

And I figure, you know, "Oh, why not?"

So I ask him a couple of pretty simple questions,

and he is really annoying.

I mean, he's acting like

I'm sort of stupid for asking, you know?

So finally, I say, "Oh, whom am I speaking to exactly?"

And he says, rather reluctantly,

"Well, Bradley Congress."

[Bruce chuckles]

And I say, "Bradley Congress, Bill van Veen's old roommate?"

And he said, "What?

Who are you?"

So after a while, you know,

we ended up having lunch together,

and he turned out to be this rather charming fellow.

And the weirdest thing of all, guess who he's married to.

- Mm, who?

- Natalie Nauman. - Ooh!

[Roger laughs] No, impossible.

Oh, my god.

[Roger laughs] [Bruce laughs]

- And she said, "I'm serious.

There's a cow that's escaped next door,

and I have to go put the cow back,"

'cause she lived in Wisconsin. - Really?

Really? - Yeah.

- Wow. - Yeah.

- Well, it was great

to see you. - It was wonderful.

- Yes. - It was just great, yeah.

- Okay. - Okay.

- Okay.

- Great.

[upbeat music]

[gentle guitar music]

[door opens]

[door closes]

[woman singing in foreign language]

[dishware clattering]

- Whoa!

What's in that sandwich?

- It's roast veal with tomatoes.

- [Man] Oh, yeah?

[man laughs]

[dog barking]

[gentle music]

[woman singing in foreign language]

[dog barking]

- It was a long time before I had to be at Frank's,

so I decided to walk there by an indirect route.

[gentle ethereal music]

Why had a dog come out of nowhere to find me?

[Marie laughs]

[Marie laughs]

[ball bouncing] [bell jingling]

At first, he was following me.

But after a while, I started following him.

We didn't seem to go far.

We were walking on streets I'd somehow

never ran across before.

[child screams] [people laughing]

[door opens]

[gentle music]

Wait!

Stop!

[water splashing]

The sound of the water was intoxicating.

He felt it too.

We sat on the grass and listened to the water.

[Marie chuckling]

[couple shouting]

[door opens]

[door closes]

- [Bruce] Do you have a room available?

- Certainly, sir. - Go on, get out of here!

Go!

Fucking asshole!

- [Man] Shut the fuck up.

- Go back to her,

why don't you?! - Fuck it, I'm outta here.

- [Woman] Go! Good!

[card rattling]

- Do you have any luggage?

- No, no.

No luggage.

[woman screaming]

[wall thudding]

[woman screaming]

[couple shouting]

- [Man] This is a perfectly nice place.

This place is fucking great!

- Oh?! - You know how much this cost.

Look- - I don't give a shit!

I don't give a shit!

[woman screams] [baby crying]

What's that?!

What's that, you fucker?!

[couple shouting] [baby crying]

- [Man] Just put it down!

Put it down!

Stop!

[woman screams] Stop!

Just stop! - What is that?!

- [Man] Just stop, okay?!

- [Woman] Oh, sure, I'll stop!

Next time-

- The next one's gonna hurt!

[baby crying] [couple shouting]

[siren wailing]

[gentle bell music]

[car horn honking]

[window squeaking]

[gentle music]

[Bruce sighs]

[refrigerator door opens]

[refrigerator door closes]

[bottle cap rattles]

[siren wailing]

[people chattering]

- [Marie] I woke up.

It was cold.

It was time to get to Frank's.

It was time to meet Bruce

and finally tell him that I had to leave him.

[dog barking] [thunder rumbling]

[door opens]

[door closes]

[siren wailing]

[gentle music]

[upbeat music]

[doorbell buzzes]

[door buzzes] [door opens]

[man singing in foreign language]

[door closes]

[people chattering]

- [Man] Hey, you made it.

- Yes.

Gosh. - Well, come on in.

Always room for one more, I hope.

[man laughs]

Well, here. We'll just toss this in here.

- [Woman] Are you okay?

- [Man] I'm fine, I really wish you wouldn't do this

in front of all- - Okay.

[woman laughs]

- [Marie] Bruce obviously wasn't there yet.

I kept telling myself that he promised

we'd only stay briefly,

and then we'd go out to dinner and talk.

[people laughing]

- Hey.

What can I get you?

- I'm not sure.

- [Bartender] In that case, try a Malaysian Tuesday.

[people laughing]

- That's great. Thank you.

- [Woman] That there are babies dying

because they were brought up

on milk that was intentionally mislabeled.

- But, Jean- - There are old men and women

that could be our parents

that can't even afford to buy underwear.

I mean, these are people with pride,

and they need all the money they have

just to survive and pay rent.

- [Man] I know.

- [Jean] But they don't have anything to complain about.

- [Man] Jean, I understand.

Please, my only point was that people can do what they want.

- Oh, that is fucked.

It's fucked. - Fucking insane.

He's just insane.

I mean, I've done everything I can for this guy.

I mean, I've helped him.

I've worked very hard for the guy for three whole years,

but it's driving me bananas

to the point where I really don't know what to do.

Do you see what I'm saying?

- [Woman] Sure. He's insane.

Really, I'm just trying to help you.

- [Man] I mean that I'm in a situation

which I don't like and I have to get out of it,

and I'm not sure how to get out of it, that's all.

- [Woman] What if I just might not be able

to find anything else?

[people chattering]

- [Man] No, it's brightness and just bigness.

- [Woman] You like this, don't you?

- No. - You like the drama.

- Bettina. - Hey, Bruce.

- [Bruce] Great to see you.

- [Bettina] Great to see you too.

- Hello. - Good to see you, man.

- [Bruce] Oh, yeah, hi.

Frances.

Frances, oh, you look fantastic.

Cassandra. Hey, gorgeous dress.

Mwah.

Mwah. - Aww, hi,

it's nice to see you.

[people chattering]

- I seem to be a little late. I'm so sorry.

Have you been here long?

- Not really. - No?

Oh, no. That looks like a bar over there.

[people laughing]

- [Marie] He looked like a prince.

He was handsome.

He looked like a god.

- [Bruce] Mm, this one.

- Ooh, very wise choice, sir. - Oh, good.

I hope so.

- Hey, Bruce.

- Oh. Janet.

- Hi. - Hello.

How are you? - How you been?

- I've been just fine. You?

- I'm great. - You look gorgeous.

- Thank you very much. - This is a lovely party.

Can I have some salt? - Hey, Annie.

- [Bruce] Did you put salt on that already?

- [Bartender] There's just a little bit of salt.

- Okay. - Are we having plans?

- Christie? - Yeah.

- [Woman] She's supposed to be here.

[people laughing]

[people chattering]

- [Man] Because he gave me the job, and I started out-

- [Woman] Are you getting a salary too?

- [Man] No, yes, yes.

- Hi. - Hi.

- You work with Frank, don't you?

- No, I don't.

- Oh, I thought I once saw you over at his office.

I sell them stuff sometimes.

Actually, I never know who I'm gonna see over there

because Rosemary keeps reorganizing

the departments all the time.

Always thought that's a rather inefficient way to run...

[people laughing]

- [Man] I don't think it's a safe piece.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- You all right?

- Yeah.

Yeah, I'm fine.

- [Man] I mean, you go to a lot of parties?

[glasses clinking] [people laughing]

- [Man] Sometimes, yeah.

- Ah. Very delicious.

I think I'll get plowed.

What a party.

The people here are great.

Really, really fantastic.

Really delightful.

- Janet in particular, eh, darling?

- Janet?

Janet? What?

Are you joking?

Janet? Janet?

Well, yes, Janet is an unusual woman, darling.

I mean, did you know that she's actually a dancer?

But really, darling. - Well, she's very attractive.

Yes, well, yes.

Yes, she is.

She is very attractive, but not to me.

You see, darling, not to me, darling.

- A little overheated, though, by her, sweetheart.

- What? You must be crackers.

I'm as sound as a bell, if you get my meaning.

- Oh. [Bruce groans]

Spilled the drink, eh, darling?

- Wow.

Wow, gotta watch the angle

of those fucking, those fucking-

- Bruce, sweetheart, you seem a little tight, a little high.

- Listen, are you kidding?

You are in very good hands tonight, darling, believe me.

Believe me, I am in very good shape.

I am really in very good shape.

And you're not in bad shape yourself, you know, darling?

I mean, fuck Janet.

You are really looking very attractive.

Very, very attractive, darling.

I'm really not kidding.

I really...

You really look great.

I mean, your hair, darling, and that marvelous lipstick.

- Well, Bruce- - No, I...

Really, darling.

I'm really being serious.

The people at this party are very excited by you, darling.

I've been watching the way they look you over.

And I mean, these people would really like to have you.

They'd really like to have you.

I mean, they really want you, if you get my meaning.

- Well, Bruce-

- Darling, your hands are awfully cold. Why is that?

- I'm not sure.

- But why are your hands cold, darling?

Are you sick? Are you?

- I don't think so, Bruce.

- Darling, listen to me, you don't think it's possible-

- What?

I mean, you don't think that-

- No, no, darling.

I was referring to the flu.

I mean, I'm sure that you're all right.

You just looked a little bit peaked.

But now why don't you sit here quietly,

and I'll get you a drink?

You need another drink now, darling.

- What?

[Marie groaning]

- Excuse me. Excuse me.

Let me get this part straight

in my head before we go any further.

I mean, you seem to be saying that, pretty soon,

children won't need to learn to read.

Isn't that really your point?

- No, I didn't- - Oh, I'm sorry.

I thought that was what you just finished saying.

- [Man] No, I really didn't say children don't need to read.

- What? - Slap me, hit me-

- Oh, the TV show.

I don't watch television. - Oh.

- I'm afraid I don't watch television.

- [Marie] I needed to get us outta there,

but Bruce seemed to be having the time of his life.

- Soon, they'll be machines on the market

and sooner than we think,

that will be capable of sending virtual messages

directly to our brain.

- Oh, what a marvelous man.

Oh, he's so extraordinary. He's so remarkable.

And I've just been sitting there,

day after day, just taking it all in.

And that's fine. That's wonderful.

But the fact happens to be

that the guy is really driving me bananas.

- Right.

- [Woman] Sure.

- This is the man that you work for?

- Yes. I mean, the guy's insane.

He's fucking insane.

- World without any books at all.

I mean, books will just be out.

I mean, really, just no more books.

No more books of any kind

because they really won't be needed, will they?

So why should anyone learn to read? Why should they?

I mean, isn't that really what the whole

situation comes to, really?

- [Woman] Coming into your space,

I don't think that's appropriate.

- It's just impossible.

And I work for the guy.

I mean, I've done what I can for the guy.

I've worked very hard for the guy for three whole years.

I've worked my ass off, and he just can't leave me alone.

And it's reached the point,

well, just really reached the point

where it's just driving me bananas.

[people chattering]

[gentle music]

[Marie sighs]

- [Man] You people have completely

missed the point. - Excuse me.

- [Man] It's a satire.

- Well, here you go, darling.

Here's that drink.

And here's one for me.

Oh.

Oh, good Christ, I like these.

Are you all right, darling?

I mean, you look just great.

Just great.

Great.

So why don't you tell me?

Be frank with me, darling.

Let's be absolutely true to what we feel.

I mean, really, darling, do you care for me at all?

I mean, let's talk frankly.

Do you actually like me?

What do you feel? Why not just tell me?

Do you love me, darling?

Do you actually love me?

- Well, Bruce, I find you very attractive,

if that's what you mean.

You're a very beautiful man, Bruce.

You're a very beautiful man.

You have a very beautiful body, actually.

- Well, darling, do you really find me handsome?

- You're a very handsome man, Bruce.

You're a very, very attractive man.

- That's very exciting.

I like that, darling. I really do like it.

[chuckles]

Only you should fuck me more often, then, darling.

I mean, if you find me so handsome-

- Bruce, really?

- No, really. I mean it.

You should fuck me more often,

because, I mean, you can be sort of a cunt, darling,

at certain times, when you refuse to fuck me.

[Marie sighs]

Anyway, I'm just saying you should fuck me more often.

- I hear you, Bruce.

- Well, I'm being an asshole, I know.

I mean, sometimes, that's my way.

Sometimes I seem to be an asshole.

I mean, other people aren't, but I am one, somehow.

An asshole, I mean.

I mean, you know me, darling. I'm an asshole.

Bruce, really?

- But I need another drink.

I really do like the way they're making

these drinks here tonight.

They're just extremely decently prepared.

Shall I get you one, sweetheart?

I'll bet you'd like another drink, wouldn't you?

I'll bet you would.

[dog barking]

- [Woman] Weird.

- You're drawing a connection

between two completely different things.

I mean, the fact that these machines have been invented

doesn't really have much to do with

my opinions about popular music.

- [Man] Well, didn't you just say that?

Didn't you say children should listen

to popular music in school?

- [Man] Oh, here I am. Coming through.

Hot soup.

- No, I'm curious as to why you feel

it's important, in any way, to-

- [Man] I mean, it was a weird night that we [laughs]...

[people chattering]

[dog barking]

- [Woman] Okay, can I just ask you,

why didn't you call him back?

[people chattering]

[bird tweeting]

- [Man] I mean, what are you doing?

What are you doing in here?

- [Man] Well, if you were doing something that is perhaps...

[people chattering]

- It's so hard to deal with a guy like this

on a day-to-day basis

because you really don't wanna hurt his feelings.

But on the other hand,

you really wanna do certain things

that would probably really hurt him.

And you really should do them, but you just don't want to.

- Right.

- You're trying to be nice, but he makes it impossible.

- There are times when you just have to be brutal

with people like that.

- But, you know, I understand what you're saying.

But I mean, isn't it possible for people to just sometimes

not feel what they actually do feel?

- What?

- Do you know what I mean?

- Sure. - I mean, they may actually

feel a certain thing,

but they don't really know that they do

because, in their own conscious minds,

they're so incredibly involved in what they think

that they feel that they don't really feel the thing at all.

Do you see what I'm saying?

I mean, like, for example,

a very common example is when you're supposed

to feel pleased by something.

- Right. - Mm.

Like, when somebody gives you a present,

and you're supposed to feel pleased,

but, actually, you don't because the thing is something

that actually you hate,

or you actually already have the thing.

Well, then, you're not supposed to say,

"Well, I really hate this."

You're supposed to say,

"Oh, boy, that's great, I really like it."

- [Bruce] Well, here's that drink now, my love.

- Thank you, Bruce.

I feel really sick.

- Oh.

Well, you can rest right here, darling.

You can even fall asleep.

No one will disturb you.

- I think I'm gonna close my eyes for a minute.

- Was very enjoyable for all concerned.

The exquisite dishes, the languid conversations.

Oh, my god, of course, we loved it all.

It was utterly sublime.

The embroidered napkins,

the little bars of soap in the guest bathrooms.

If anyone tells you that we didn't adore it,

they're simply a liar.

The inside walls of those limousines were lined

with some kind of a beige moleskin

that made you feel somehow

as if the outside world was barely...

[gentle music]

[winds blowing]

[waves crashing]

- Come.

Join us.

- We're having one of Margaret's special stews tonight.

It's spring squash with pea shoots and tomatoes.

- [Man] Gwendolyn was just telling us

about a ceremony she attended.

- Yes, well, I was just saying that, by this time,

most of us had drunk from the rushing river.

And, of course, we were naked.

[group chuckling]

And then, the woman with the necklace

reached into a little bag

and took out a jewel that looked like a blue marble.

See, I brought one back with me.

[Marie gasps]

- Oh. - Ooh.

- [Marie] Oh.

[Marie chuckles]

- And then the woman with the necklace

picked one of the people and did something like this.

[gentle music]

[Marie laughs]

[chandelier jingling]

[group chuckling]

[group applauding] [group laughing]

- So beautiful.

- Come on, come on. - Come on.

- You can do it. - Come on.

[group cheering] - Maybe they're just

too tired for-

- Obviously, I'm not saying I know the whole story.

I'm not saying I know more than you do.

I've been there, of course,

but I've never really lived there.

I don't really know about

the way things work there. [Marie yawns]

I've read certain articles- - Oh, you've read an article.

- [Man] I've read certain articles.

I've read certain articles,

talked to some people who know more than I do,

and the fact happens to be that I happened to be there

at the very odd moment,

I happened to be there when some of the things

I've read about happened to be occurring.

- [Woman] You were there yourself?

- [Woman] Or are you saying that...

[gentle music]

[man coughing]

- Why do you think [coughs]...

Why do you think the thought of popular music

bothers you so much?

[man coughing]

- Doesn't bother me a bit.

- [Man] Well, don't you think there's anything to be learned

by listening to them? - Well, I saw that man

being pressed between two panes of glass,

and it was horrible, horrible. [woman screaming]

I mean, you can't imagine.

The way his tongue was hanging to one side.

He looked just like a slaughtered beast.

- But why are you telling me this?

- [Man] These are the articles.

These people...

Don't you see? [woman laughing]

- This is what I was trying to explain to your brother.

- Don't bring him into this. - Don't what?

- [Woman] Don't bring my brother into this!

- Oh, he's already in it.

He is involved in this.

He is involved in it.

He's in the field we're discussing.

Don't tell me not to bring him into it.

He's in it.

- [Man] No limits on their demands or appetites.

[people chattering]

- [Man] See, ultimately, the idea of anything gourmet,

specifically, sort of disgusts me.

- [Woman] That's sad.

[people laughing]

- Well, I was sitting over there in the other room.

I had to sit down and rest for a minute

'cause I'd had quite a few of those margaritas.

And I started thinking back over the day I'd had,

and I realized I'd really had quite a day.

I really had.

First, lunch with Roger, which was enjoyable, as always.

And then I had some shopping to do.

So I started to walk through some unfamiliar parts of town.

Then I really had such an interesting walk.

I walked through different sorts of streets,

and even down by a waterfront somewhere.

And, eventually, I got thirsty.

And I went into a cafe

where they made me a delicious drink

made of freshly squeezed orange juice and soda.

- Here you go. - Well, I was sipping my drink

when, all of a sudden, there was a blaze of sunlight

from the street outside,

and a young woman came in and sat down right next to me.

She almost immediately reached into her bag,

and, with great precision,

brought out a sheet of newspaper and started to read it.

I could see it was an article about a horrible murder

that had happened recently.

And I thought to myself,

"Something had gone wrong in this person's life.

She's lost.

She's searching for something."

Her face was intense, desperate,

with a wild restlessness.

I thought, "I'm gonna start a conversation with her.

And then I'm gonna go to her apartment and fuck her."

Wait!

That meat is hot.

- What did you just say?

- I was...

You have to be careful not to burn yourself.

I realized that a sexual encounter might unlock

a terrible grief in her.

She might become unstable, even hysterical.

I looked at her feet.

They seemed dirty.

I decided to masturbate instead.

Can I have the check, please?

[woman screaming]

[wall thudding] [woman screaming]

[couple shouting]

I went to a sordid hotel which looked out on an alley.

But across the passageway, a stranger appeared in a window.

Was she aware of me?

She showed herself to me, expecting nothing in return.

I felt she was warm and loving,

and I was moved,

overwhelmed.

I watched, and I felt nourished.

I felt replenished.

[gentle music]

[object crashes]

[man yelling]

My god.

I was already supposed to be at Frank's.

And there was still something I wanted to buy on the way.

[lively music]

After I left the store, I didn't wanna run.

I was afraid of sweating.

I walked with big strides, rapidly, controlling the sweat.

[people laughing] [people chattering]

- [Man] It's as if they slapped the wrong guy.

That's what's funny about it.

- [Man] Oh, that's interesting.

- Bettina. - Hey, Bruce.

- Great to see you.

- [Bettina] Great to see you too.

- Hello. - Good to see you.

- I made it to Frank's just a little bit late.

[people chattering]

- [Marie] I slept so soundly.

My body seemed to sink into the sofa so heavily,

so far, like an object falling in water.

When I woke up again, I felt really sick.

Bruce was sitting right next to me.

- Well, darling, I'm glad to see you awake.

You had me worried for a while.

I wish you could've heard the conversation

I was just having with Jack.

There were some amazing things

about the treatment of certain illnesses

that he was explaining to me.

I mean, did you know that, at one time,

vomiting was considered an expression

of sadness rather than a-

- Bruce, did you slap me when I was sleeping?

- Why, of course not, darling.

What do you mean? Are you crazy?

- I don't feel normal.

- God, darling, you...

Do you think you might be...

I mean, what's going on? [Marie groaning]

Are you mentally ill?

I mean, what is it?

Do you think you might actually be crazy now?

- Oh, Bruce- - Darling, I really hope not.

- Oh, Bruce, please.

- Oh, I've had this terrible feeling lately

that something was gonna happen somehow.

- Just talk to me, Bruce.

Help me.

Hold me. - Oh.

Oh, god, well, let's see.

Do I have anything to say to you?

Well, I had a marvelous lunch with Roger.

Prawns and peas.

It was absolutely great.

- Aw, darling, I'm sick.

- Yes.

And then, oh!

Oh, yes.

Gloria and I were just having

the most fascinating conversation.

We were talking about the whole question

of people having servants.

And I was saying that it really seems

to be sort of a shame that the whole tradition

of people having servants has gone out of style,

because, I mean, the whole point of it was

that servants were people who could be counted on

to really care about your welfare,

and sort of respect you, whether you deserved it or not.

- [Marie groans] - And I just think that's...

I just think that's so nice.

[Marie sighs] Oh, darling, I'm boring you.

I'm so sorry. Really, how dreadful.

- Bruce, please.

- It's just awful.

I really am sorry.

Well, I'll get you another drink,

and meanwhile, you can just rest here.

I have to have a talk with Grace over there.

- With who, Bruce?

- Well, you remember, darling.

The friend of Chuck's.

The brunette.

The woman who went fishing in her panties.

- What? [Bruce chuckles]

- Actually...

You know, actually, darling,

I spent the night with her once, about 11 years ago.

And I have to say, she was really amazing.

I mean, pardon me, darling,

but her vagina was just incredibly tight, you know?

It was like being gripped by a hand.

And I remember when we were done,

my penis was just absolutely bright red.

I mean, it looked like a raw piece of meat or fish.

And I felt absolutely drained.

My testicles were as dry as bones.

They ached for a week.

God, it was great.

It was really something.

- Darling, I'm sick!

- Darling, why is it that whenever

we have a conversation, you always feel sick?

I mean, you ask me to talk to you,

and then I do, and then you feel sick.

Have you ever really noticed that?

Because it's really sort of a pattern with you, darling.

And, I mean, it's kind of upsetting.

It actually gives me a pain in my ass, if you wanna know.

- All right, Bruce.

- And, I mean, really, darling,

the faces you make sometimes,

I mean, the people here are gonna think

you're an absolute nut.

- All right, Bruce. I said all right!

All right!

- [Woman] Remember when they tied the guy up

with the rattlesnakes?

- I do not. - Do you remember that?

They tied him up with the rattlesnakes.

- I didn't see that. - And they injected him

with amphetamine and they gave him an hour to get out.

Do you remember that?

- We had been at the party for a really long time.

I decided it was time to leave.

I went to Frank's bedroom to get my coat.

[telephone ringing]

Hello?

- [Man] Hey, who's this?

Jane? [static crackling]

- I'm not...

I don't feel very well, so I can't talk right now.

- [Man] Calm down.

Please. - Who is this?

[static crackling]

Should I get Frank for you?

- [Man] This is Willy.

- Willy, I'll go get Frank.

[people chattering]

I went to find Frank.

I was feeling very sick.

I finally found Bruce.

- I can't stand.

- He went to get his coat, and then we left.

We walked to a restaurant.

I picked it.

I like it.

I used to go there all the time when I was single.

We ate dinner in silence.

The restaurant was cold.

Thank you.

[dishware clattering]

- Darling, you seem to be drinking

a lot of coffee, sweetheart.

Do you think that's wise?

I mean, I wonder, darling.

I mean, sometimes it makes you

a bit nervous, don't you think so?

- What? What?

Are you telling me something?

- Well, you know, darling, I was only talking.

I mean, you know me, darling. Sometimes I say things.

No, I mean, darling, I was only saying that sometimes...

I mean, you seem to be a little bit nervous

already tonight, darling.

And I sometimes notice that sometimes

when you actually already are feeling nervous,

you seem to like to drink coffee.

And sometimes that can actually have the effect

of actually making you more nervous

than you already were before.

So that's really all I was trying to say,

actually, darling.

I'm sorry.

I don't mean to upset you.

- Look, Bruce, there's a reason I wanted to talk to you,

something I needed to say.

- What is it, sweetheart?

- Bruce, do you know I never really loved you?

I never loved you.

I never loved you.

- Well, I don't-

- I pretended to you.

Sometimes I even pretended to myself.

Most of the time, I didn't even do that.

You see, I don't even like you.

Not at all.

I don't like you. I don't respect you.

You're nothing but shit, as far as I'm concerned.

- Do you think we should just have

our dinner for the moment?

Darling, I mean, perhaps we should go into all this

when we've finished our meal.

- I don't enjoy your company, I don't enjoy being with you.

You're pitiful. You're pathetic.

You're actually one of the least interesting people

I've ever met in my life.

- Yes, well, my darling, what do you think?

Are we gonna have our meal here or not?

I mean, this was the restaurant that you wanted to go to.

And personally, I would've rather had something cheap,

and this is not my favorite kind of food.

But if we are gonna be here,

then it seems somewhat absurd

if all we're gonna do is have an unpleasant conversation.

- Bruce- - I mean, I had thought

that we were going to have a nice evening together.

I know you're unhappy.

But we could discuss your unhappiness,

and still have a very nice evening together.

- I hate you, Bruce.

That's why I have to leave you.

I'm very, very sorry.

[door opens]

- [Man] Oh, hey, Fred.

All right, you know, we're both gonna have the scungilli.

No, I mean, I've been feeling worse and worse

for several days, you know.

I mean, I feel just fine.

And then I eat, and I get this sensation

that somehow the food was just rotting in my stomach.

I mean, something was not happening correctly in there.

And then, suddenly, I get these sharp, shooting pains,

like a sort of flash, like lightning,

along the entire length of my asshole, somehow.

Oh, and then, by Friday, whole new sensation.

My stomach starts to give these little leaps,

these lurches like this, like [groaning].

And I feel like I really have to go

to the bathroom, very badly.

And then two seconds go by,

and it goes away, and I feel all right.

And I don't have to go to the bathroom anymore.

Well, finally, late in the afternoon,

get one of these lurches,

and I sorta really rush to the bathroom,

and I sit right down on the toilet, and then, right then,

suddenly, I begin to feel dizzy and faint.

I really feel awful.

I actually think, I'm gonna throw up.

- God.

- There's a kinda burning sensation

along my whole rectal area, so it's very painful to shit.

But the horrible thing is that I've-

- Excuse me, sorry.

Excuse me, you see, we're eating our meal.

- You what?

- I say, we're eating our meal.

And your conversation, we couldn't help hearing it.

- What?

What?

- We can't...

We're eating.

- Is this guy trying to tell me I'm talking too loudly?

- [Bruce] Well, sir...

- Pardon me.

Can I make a suggestion?

Would you mind?

I'd like you to return to your table.

That way, we won't have any kind of trouble.

- Oh.

I see, yes.

Oh, yes, well, if that's the way you feel about it.

Well, yes.

I see.

Uh-huh.

All right.

Fine, fine.

Well, all right.

Yes.

Oh, yes.

Uh-huh.

- You eat shit, Bruce.

- Yes, well, okay, okay.

- I'm sorry I met you.

I'm sorry I knew you.

Of all the men I knew, you turned out to be the worst.

It's very sad.

Our dinner was spoiled, and my life was spoiled,

all because I met you.

I wish I hadn't. [Bruce sighs]

I wish I hadn't.

- Yeah, it's a shame.

- You horrible shit.

- Yeah, that's right.

- You horrible shit!

- Well, darling, would you like to leave now?

I mean, I don't imagine you'll be wanting any dessert.

- No?

- Well, I didn't- - Well, fuck you, Bruce,

maybe I'd like some.

- Oh. Well, great.

Well, that's great. We'll, have some, yes.

Sir.

Sir.

We'll have that thing, that thing with the pears.

Right away, actually.

- Oh. All right.

- [Bruce] Yes, that would be great.

- Yes, that would be great.

- Must you always mock me, darling?

- Well, Bruce, I'm afraid I can't help it.

You're just so mockable. You're my mockable boy.

[group laughing]

- [Woman] That is the funniest thing I've ever seen.

[group chattering]

- So, Bruce, do you actually not care at all

that I'm leaving you?

- Oh, are you leaving me, darling?

- Yes, I'm planning to leave you.

[Bruce sighs]

- Well, darling, I think it's a little funny

just to tell me that, isn't it?

I mean, what brings this up right at this moment, you see?

I mean, what have I done?

I've just gone to a certain restaurant for dinner,

and I'd understood it to be one that you like,

and as far as I can tell,

it's lived up to expectations

at least a hundred percent, I would say.

- Bruce, you're funny. You really are.

So you actually don't care at all

that I'm leaving you, then.

- Well, you're not really leaving me, darling.

I mean, you feel that you would like to,

but you really aren't actually leaving,

if you see what I mean.

- You don't think I'm leaving?

- Well, are you?

- Yes, I am, Bruce. I really am.

- But, darling, I mean, don't you know you can't leave me?

I mean, don't you know that I love you, darling?

- Love me?

Love me?

Bruce, it's ridiculous for you to even use that word

because you have no idea what it stands for!

Don't you know you're not a living person?!

- I'm sorry, darling. I thought I was one.

[footsteps treading]

Well, what am I, then?

I mean, I run around like a living person.

I say things.

I talk to people.

I even have certain feelings, believe it or not.

- Bruce, I don't feel well.

- I try to be decent.

- No, Bruce, listen to me,

you are not human, you are not a person.

You have no connection to me or to any other person,

and you never will have one, and you never can have one,

and that is why, to me, you are nothing

but a filthy piece of shit

that's attached to me physically.

So I am cutting you off me, you see.

I am cutting you off me. I am cutting you away from me!

- Marie, please. - No, don't you see?

Your face isn't really even a face,

because there is nothing behind it, because you are dead.

Dead. You're a horrible, dead piece of meat.

Oh, god, it is awful.

I am sitting with someone who isn't even alive,

and that is why it's so easy!

It's so easy, it's so easy to leave!

I'm so sorry!

I'm so sorry.

[Bruce sighs]

- Darling?

- What?

- Darling, do you know what I did today?

I bought a new typewriter for myself.

It's right here in the box.

It was made in Romania, and it was remarkably cheap.

But the incredible thing is it's really very well-designed.

It's almost silent.

I tried it out at the store, and it worked like a charm.

I really love it.

I'll show you when we get home.

It's just not noisy.

It won't bother you at all.

- You bought a new typewriter?

- Yes, I did.

- But do you think you'll miss your old one?

- Well, you know, I really don't think so.

- [Marie] We finished our dessert,

and then I took him home.

By the time we left the restaurant, he was drunk again.

We went home in a taxi.

Bruce was giving his thoughts on the subjects of the day.

- I can't believe they're closing all those nightclubs.

I mean, if it bothers them so much,

that music playing on their block

and people dancing and enjoying themselves,

why don't they go live in the country?

Why don't they go live on a farm?

- I know. It's true.

- People come to the city to have a good time.

Let them go and live on a farm

with some sheep if they feel that way.

- I really agree.

- Marie...

- It's all right, Bruce.

- Oh, god.

Things are really spinning.

- It's all right.

As we rode, he hugged me tightly.

He hugged me as we went around corners.

He hugged me when the taxi went faster.

When we got home, the apartment was cool.

There was a breeze.

[lock clicking]

- He said there's this incredible new place

that sells fruit behind the laundromat.

- Oh, yeah, Mrs. Katz told me about it.

[typewriter clacking]

[typewriter whirring]

[typewriter clacking]

- Isn't that amazing?

[typewriter clacking]

[typewriter whirring]

[bell dings] [typewriter whirring]

[bell dings] [typewriter whirring]

[typewriter clacking]

- I made some hot milk,

and we sat in our chairs, and we drank it.

And then I put him to bed.

Bruce, come on, sweetheart.

[gentle piano music]

[Bruce sighs]

I stayed up for a while.

I took a shower.

I read a newspaper.

Then I went to bed myself.

[cars whooshing]

It was warm under the sheet.

I watched the shadows moving on the wall.

I listened to the cars rushing by outside the window.

[thunder rumbles]

[rain pattering]

Then it started to rain again.

It began very gently, very lightly.

And then the sound of the rain grew stronger and heavier.

I sank down farther into the darkness of my pillow,

farther and farther and farther,

and I slept.

[gentle guitar music]

[woman singing in foreign language]