Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
3
00:00:23,108 --> 00:00:26,287
- can you teach an old dog
to turn tricks?
4
00:00:26,311 --> 00:00:27,555
ruff!
5
00:00:27,579 --> 00:00:30,458
canine call girls
next on sick, sad world.
6
00:00:30,482 --> 00:00:33,962
- daria, have you seen my new
teenage superstars magazine?
7
00:00:33,986 --> 00:00:35,529
- i couldn't help myself.
8
00:00:35,553 --> 00:00:38,733
i've plastered my walls
with its hot, sexy pinups.
9
00:00:38,757 --> 00:00:40,601
- i'll ask mom.
10
00:00:40,625 --> 00:00:42,703
- daria, have you seen
your father?
11
00:00:42,727 --> 00:00:45,907
- did you look under the
teenage superstars magazine?
12
00:00:45,931 --> 00:00:49,177
- i'll ask quinn.
13
00:00:49,201 --> 00:00:50,611
- need some money
for new clothes
14
00:00:50,635 --> 00:00:51,679
for the standardized test,
15
00:00:51,703 --> 00:00:52,780
because i hate filling in
16
00:00:52,804 --> 00:00:54,415
those little circles
in an old outfit.
17
00:00:54,439 --> 00:00:55,616
- now, did you see your father?
18
00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:57,418
when was the last time
you saw him?
19
00:00:57,442 --> 00:00:59,453
- hello?
anybody?
20
00:00:59,477 --> 00:01:00,654
please?
21
00:01:00,678 --> 00:01:01,990
is anybody out there?
22
00:01:02,014 --> 00:01:03,891
am i the only one left
in the house?
23
00:01:03,915 --> 00:01:05,693
- if i help you
with the first question,
24
00:01:05,717 --> 00:01:08,329
will you try to do
the second one on your own?
25
00:01:08,353 --> 00:01:09,863
- daria, thank god!
26
00:01:09,887 --> 00:01:11,132
your mother's at her work thing,
27
00:01:11,156 --> 00:01:13,134
and quinn's at her school thing,
and...
28
00:01:13,158 --> 00:01:14,769
i thought i'd be stuck
in here forever.
29
00:01:14,793 --> 00:01:17,272
- okay, listen closely.
30
00:01:17,296 --> 00:01:18,973
there's a knob on the door.
31
00:01:18,997 --> 00:01:20,641
turn it counterclockwise.
32
00:01:20,665 --> 00:01:22,443
- we're all out
of toilet paper, kiddo!
33
00:01:22,467 --> 00:01:24,111
would you believe it?
- oh.
34
00:01:24,135 --> 00:01:26,380
well, i'll go grab some
from downstairs.
35
00:01:26,404 --> 00:01:27,815
- there isn't any downstairs.
36
00:01:27,839 --> 00:01:29,317
that's why i ran up here.
37
00:01:29,341 --> 00:01:31,285
damn heart-smart chili.
38
00:01:31,309 --> 00:01:32,419
- i see.
39
00:01:32,443 --> 00:01:35,123
walking away now
with too much information.
40
00:01:35,147 --> 00:01:36,958
- kiddo, could you hurry over
to drugs 'n' stuff
41
00:01:36,982 --> 00:01:38,025
and pick up a few rolls?
42
00:01:38,049 --> 00:01:40,061
- i get stuck
on the "hurry" part.
43
00:01:40,085 --> 00:01:41,095
- damn it.
44
00:01:41,119 --> 00:01:42,997
how in hell would helen
handle this?
45
00:01:43,021 --> 00:01:44,966
"how in hell would helen"...
46
00:01:44,990 --> 00:01:47,735
hey, i bet that's one of those
backwards-and-forward things!
47
00:01:47,759 --> 00:01:50,071
no, i guess not.
48
00:01:50,095 --> 00:01:51,605
- i can hear you, you know.
49
00:01:51,629 --> 00:01:53,907
and she'd offer me a bribe.
- yeah!
50
00:01:53,931 --> 00:01:55,543
if you can make it back
in 15 minutes,
51
00:01:55,567 --> 00:01:57,011
i'll give you five bucks.
52
00:01:57,035 --> 00:01:58,579
- a decent bribe.
53
00:01:58,603 --> 00:02:00,280
- 20!
- you're on.
54
00:02:00,304 --> 00:02:02,516
see you in a few minutes.
- hurry, kiddo!
55
00:02:02,540 --> 00:02:05,875
this teenage superstars
magazine is only 64 pages.
56
00:02:09,147 --> 00:02:10,524
- ten minutes.
57
00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:13,161
i'll never make it home in time
to get that 20.
58
00:02:13,185 --> 00:02:15,163
of course, i could always
turn back
59
00:02:15,187 --> 00:02:16,630
all the clocks in the house,
60
00:02:16,654 --> 00:02:18,966
but how will i get
to his wristwatch?
61
00:02:18,990 --> 00:02:21,169
i wonder if they sell
chloroform here.
62
00:02:21,193 --> 00:02:23,137
- next.
can i help you, dear?
63
00:02:23,161 --> 00:02:25,940
- no, i just came to enjoy
your reenactment
64
00:02:25,964 --> 00:02:27,575
of the fall of saigon.
65
00:02:27,599 --> 00:02:28,710
- you mean the crowd?
66
00:02:28,734 --> 00:02:31,245
well, what do you expect
on homecoming night?
67
00:02:31,269 --> 00:02:32,646
- homecoming night?
68
00:02:32,670 --> 00:02:35,204
- everyone in town
is lining up to see the parade.
69
00:02:38,610 --> 00:02:41,422
- now, really look
inside your work,
70
00:02:41,446 --> 00:02:45,393
and ask, "in focusing
so intently on my subject,
71
00:02:45,417 --> 00:02:48,396
have i neglected
my negative space?"
72
00:02:48,420 --> 00:02:50,364
daria.
have you seen jane?
73
00:02:50,388 --> 00:02:51,632
- not lately.
74
00:02:51,656 --> 00:02:54,168
- i was hoping she might
help us paint windows.
75
00:02:54,192 --> 00:02:55,936
we need her color sense.
76
00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:57,972
- cece, i'm going
to throw paint on you!
77
00:02:57,996 --> 00:03:00,708
now, gary, don't you dare!
78
00:03:00,732 --> 00:03:03,244
- no, people.
treasure your medium.
79
00:03:03,268 --> 00:03:06,914
- must get home.
must get home.
80
00:03:11,542 --> 00:03:17,725
♪ ♪
81
00:03:19,951 --> 00:03:22,096
ah!
82
00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:24,898
- you'll pay through the nose
for that shot, missy...
83
00:03:24,922 --> 00:03:26,734
unless you can give me
a plausible reason
84
00:03:26,758 --> 00:03:27,802
for your being here.
85
00:03:27,826 --> 00:03:29,503
- i was having
too much fun at home,
86
00:03:29,527 --> 00:03:31,906
so i thought i'd go out
and get killed
87
00:03:31,930 --> 00:03:33,875
by an unstable parade float.
88
00:03:33,899 --> 00:03:35,143
- yep, through the nose.
89
00:03:35,167 --> 00:03:36,510
- i'd stay and talk,
90
00:03:36,534 --> 00:03:39,247
but i've got 20 bucks riding
on my quick escape.
91
00:03:39,271 --> 00:03:40,447
join me?
92
00:03:40,471 --> 00:03:42,684
- got a date
with a thoughtless delinquent.
93
00:03:42,708 --> 00:03:44,285
- you're meeting tom here?
94
00:03:44,309 --> 00:03:46,220
- what better place
than a high school homecoming
95
00:03:46,244 --> 00:03:49,557
to chronicle the anarchic
death spiral of western society?
96
00:03:49,581 --> 00:03:52,259
- so your date consists
of making fun of people.
97
00:03:52,283 --> 00:03:54,562
- if you must be
all simplistic about it.
98
00:03:54,586 --> 00:03:56,397
and you're here because...
99
00:03:56,421 --> 00:03:58,733
- my dad sent me
on an emergency errand,
100
00:03:58,757 --> 00:04:00,167
and i got stranded.
101
00:04:00,191 --> 00:04:02,202
- i'm betting
he's stranded too.
102
00:04:02,226 --> 00:04:03,437
oh, look!
103
00:04:03,461 --> 00:04:05,372
hope you have time for a cheer
before you go.
104
00:04:05,396 --> 00:04:08,475
- okay, girls, let's pump up
the spirit.
105
00:04:08,499 --> 00:04:10,344
who's the team
that's number one?
106
00:04:10,368 --> 00:04:11,979
lawndale!
lawndale!
107
00:04:12,003 --> 00:04:13,681
who's the team
that's lots of fun?
108
00:04:13,705 --> 00:04:15,616
lawndale!
lawndale!
109
00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:16,717
go...
110
00:04:16,741 --> 00:04:17,784
football!
111
00:04:22,647 --> 00:04:24,325
hmm!
112
00:04:24,349 --> 00:04:27,060
- kevin, maybe we shouldn't be
so friendly up here.
113
00:04:27,084 --> 00:04:28,362
- relax, babe.
114
00:04:28,386 --> 00:04:30,431
you're the football sweetheart,
and i'm the q.b.
115
00:04:30,455 --> 00:04:32,232
i'm supposed to be touching you
and stuff.
116
00:04:32,256 --> 00:04:33,701
it's the law.
117
00:04:33,725 --> 00:04:35,736
- but brittany's my friend,
and she's right there.
118
00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:37,805
- hey, we're elected officials.
119
00:04:37,829 --> 00:04:39,707
it's like manifold destiny.
120
00:04:39,731 --> 00:04:40,874
- um, kevin?
121
00:04:40,898 --> 00:04:43,311
we're all supposed to be
throwing candy.
122
00:04:43,335 --> 00:04:45,234
- cool!
- ouch!
123
00:04:47,138 --> 00:04:49,316
oh, that really hurt!
oh, my god.
124
00:04:49,340 --> 00:04:50,317
- check it out;
125
00:04:50,341 --> 00:04:53,453
i'll catch it
in my mouth. ow!
126
00:04:53,477 --> 00:04:54,521
- that's it.
127
00:04:54,545 --> 00:04:56,456
when the candy reaches
escape velocity,
128
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,059
it's time to leave.
129
00:04:58,083 --> 00:04:59,493
- where the hell is tom?
130
00:04:59,517 --> 00:05:01,696
he was supposed to be here
15 minutes ago.
131
00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:03,264
- i wouldn't let it bother you.
132
00:05:03,288 --> 00:05:05,666
just because he's a few minutes
late doesn't mean
133
00:05:05,690 --> 00:05:07,168
he's an inconsiderate jerk
134
00:05:07,192 --> 00:05:09,403
who will ultimately
bring you nothing but misery.
135
00:05:09,427 --> 00:05:11,205
- i'm glad you're starting
to warm to him.
136
00:05:11,229 --> 00:05:13,106
- i need to cross
this street now
137
00:05:13,130 --> 00:05:15,476
if i want to make it home
before the next ice age.
138
00:05:15,500 --> 00:05:16,610
see you.
139
00:05:16,634 --> 00:05:20,481
- godspeed,
indiana morgendorffer.
140
00:05:20,505 --> 00:05:23,050
- ms. morgendorffer,
where do you think you're going?
141
00:05:23,074 --> 00:05:25,819
- slowly insane, but i need
to pop in at home first.
142
00:05:25,843 --> 00:05:28,021
- as principal
of lawndale high,
143
00:05:28,045 --> 00:05:30,191
i can't just permit spectators
to cross a parade route.
144
00:05:30,215 --> 00:05:31,292
- right.
145
00:05:31,316 --> 00:05:33,227
isn't that how
world war i started?
146
00:05:33,251 --> 00:05:35,196
- if you were to get impaled
on a float
147
00:05:35,220 --> 00:05:36,930
or sexually harassed by a clown,
148
00:05:36,954 --> 00:05:38,065
things could get ugly.
149
00:05:38,089 --> 00:05:39,499
- things already have,
150
00:05:39,523 --> 00:05:42,136
but i don't have time
to debate this right now.
151
00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:43,770
- crowd control inadequate.
152
00:05:43,794 --> 00:05:46,873
next year,
consider electric fences.
153
00:05:46,897 --> 00:05:49,576
- i can still
make it back in time.
154
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:52,546
all i need is a catapult
and a good tailwind.
155
00:05:52,570 --> 00:05:53,847
- rah, rah, rah!
156
00:05:53,871 --> 00:05:55,582
we're number one!
157
00:05:55,606 --> 00:05:58,885
- um, i think the roaring '20s
are back that way.
158
00:05:58,909 --> 00:06:01,054
- let's do
the lawndale shuffle.
159
00:06:01,078 --> 00:06:04,025
- how about the "get the hell
away from me" slide?
160
00:06:06,918 --> 00:06:08,629
- my head's too big.
161
00:06:08,653 --> 00:06:10,898
- that's 'cause
it's so full of dreams.
162
00:06:10,922 --> 00:06:11,966
thud!
163
00:06:11,990 --> 00:06:13,701
- rah, rah, rah.
164
00:06:13,725 --> 00:06:15,858
please help me up.
165
00:06:17,896 --> 00:06:19,139
- ms. li's gone.
166
00:06:19,163 --> 00:06:20,841
i'm out of here.
167
00:06:26,905 --> 00:06:28,816
- tad?
- daria?
168
00:06:28,840 --> 00:06:32,653
oh, daria, i'm scared.
169
00:06:34,679 --> 00:06:35,889
- so am i.
170
00:06:35,913 --> 00:06:37,158
where are your mom and dad?
171
00:06:37,182 --> 00:06:38,292
- i don't know.
172
00:06:38,316 --> 00:06:40,361
i saw a windmill
in the toy store window,
173
00:06:40,385 --> 00:06:41,796
so i went to look,
174
00:06:41,820 --> 00:06:44,365
'cause they're such
a clean source of energy,
175
00:06:44,389 --> 00:06:47,134
and when i turned around,
everyone was gone.
176
00:06:47,158 --> 00:06:50,304
now i'm frightened i'll be
stuck in this parade forever.
177
00:06:50,328 --> 00:06:52,640
- i know the feeling.
let's find you a cop.
178
00:06:52,664 --> 00:06:54,007
- oh, no.
179
00:06:54,031 --> 00:06:56,911
my dad says police officers
too often utilize
180
00:06:56,935 --> 00:07:00,447
excessive force in their quest
for efficient pacification.
181
00:07:00,471 --> 00:07:03,251
- and i'm sure your father
has had more than his share
182
00:07:03,275 --> 00:07:05,085
of scrapes with john law.
183
00:07:05,109 --> 00:07:08,144
- won't you stay with me,
daria?
184
00:07:10,782 --> 00:07:12,960
come on.
185
00:07:12,984 --> 00:07:14,462
much to my surprise,
186
00:07:14,486 --> 00:07:17,164
my conscience tells me i should
help you find your parents.
187
00:07:17,188 --> 00:07:18,566
- hooray!
188
00:07:18,590 --> 00:07:21,268
with you along, this'll be
an exciting adventure,
189
00:07:21,292 --> 00:07:22,803
like the travels of babar.
190
00:07:22,827 --> 00:07:25,806
- easy on the elephant
comparisons, kid.
191
00:07:30,502 --> 00:07:32,301
stupid conscience.
192
00:07:40,812 --> 00:07:42,857
- what's your favorite part
of the parade, daria?
193
00:07:42,881 --> 00:07:45,926
- the thigh.
no, wait, the drumstick.
194
00:07:45,950 --> 00:07:47,995
- oh.
i like the clowns.
195
00:07:48,019 --> 00:07:49,130
- of course you do.
196
00:07:49,154 --> 00:07:51,031
keep looking for your parents.
197
00:07:51,055 --> 00:07:54,034
- i also like it when they
throw candy from the floats.
198
00:07:54,058 --> 00:07:56,103
- since when do you eat candy?
199
00:07:56,127 --> 00:07:57,804
you told me it was poison.
200
00:07:57,828 --> 00:08:00,273
- oh, it is,
but every piece i catch
201
00:08:00,297 --> 00:08:03,377
is one cavity some other
boy or girl will never get.
202
00:08:03,401 --> 00:08:05,713
that's what makes it
so rewarding.
203
00:08:05,737 --> 00:08:07,848
- tad, when you brush
your teeth,
204
00:08:07,872 --> 00:08:09,883
do you ever scrub
right through to your brain?
205
00:08:09,907 --> 00:08:11,285
- oh, look!
206
00:08:11,309 --> 00:08:16,056
do you think he'll be
throwing candy from his car?
207
00:08:17,716 --> 00:08:20,561
- no, that car has things
thrown at it.
208
00:08:20,585 --> 00:08:22,163
- do my eyes deceive me?
209
00:08:22,187 --> 00:08:24,198
the divine ms. mmm.
210
00:08:24,222 --> 00:08:26,800
and who, may i ask,
is your young suitor?
211
00:08:26,824 --> 00:08:29,837
- i'm not supposed to give
my name to strange people.
212
00:08:29,861 --> 00:08:32,172
- and they don't come
any stranger than this.
213
00:08:32,196 --> 00:08:33,808
- so quick to dismiss.
214
00:08:33,832 --> 00:08:36,811
i like that...
for a while.
215
00:08:36,835 --> 00:08:38,212
but you'll change your tune
216
00:08:38,236 --> 00:08:40,314
when you see what i've done
with the back seat.
217
00:08:40,338 --> 00:08:43,284
does the notion of satin
upholstery get you excited?
218
00:08:43,308 --> 00:08:45,218
- sure, if it's lining
your coffin.
219
00:08:45,242 --> 00:08:47,654
feisty!
220
00:08:47,678 --> 00:08:50,690
i'll be parked at the end
of the parade route, gorgeous.
221
00:08:50,714 --> 00:08:53,594
so remember,
if the love machine's rocking,
222
00:08:53,618 --> 00:08:56,730
by all means, come a-knocking!
223
00:08:58,956 --> 00:09:00,000
- daria?
224
00:09:00,024 --> 00:09:02,136
- oh. tom.
225
00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:04,104
aren't you supposed to be
with jane?
226
00:09:04,128 --> 00:09:06,473
she was waiting for you
in front of drugs 'n' stuff.
227
00:09:06,497 --> 00:09:07,574
- oh.
228
00:09:07,598 --> 00:09:09,043
she just said to meet
at the pharmacy;
229
00:09:09,067 --> 00:09:10,444
i thought
she meant the other one.
230
00:09:10,468 --> 00:09:12,412
i guess it was just
a big misunderstanding.
231
00:09:12,436 --> 00:09:14,214
- that's what pol pot said.
232
00:09:14,238 --> 00:09:16,183
- he didn't mean to kill
2 million people;
233
00:09:16,207 --> 00:09:18,252
he only wanted to scare them.
234
00:09:18,276 --> 00:09:20,520
anyway, who's this?
- tad.
235
00:09:20,544 --> 00:09:21,855
former baby-sitting job.
236
00:09:21,879 --> 00:09:23,924
he's lost, and we're looking
for his parents.
237
00:09:23,948 --> 00:09:25,793
- hiya, tad.
i'm tom.
238
00:09:25,817 --> 00:09:27,360
mind if i tag along
with you guys?
239
00:09:27,384 --> 00:09:29,129
- actually,
we'd be better off...
240
00:09:29,153 --> 00:09:31,531
- we're both headed back
toward drugs 'n' stuff.
241
00:09:31,555 --> 00:09:33,267
we can help each other.
242
00:09:33,291 --> 00:09:35,536
- if you really want
to walk with us, fine,
243
00:09:35,560 --> 00:09:37,438
but i don't think
you'll find jane.
244
00:09:37,462 --> 00:09:39,673
i've never seen this street
so crowded before.
245
00:09:39,697 --> 00:09:41,375
- it is a stunning array
of pod people.
246
00:09:41,399 --> 00:09:43,544
it's times like these i'm glad
i don't go to your school.
247
00:09:43,568 --> 00:09:44,945
- uh-huh.
248
00:09:44,969 --> 00:09:48,115
and i suppose your ivy-choked
prep school is any better.
249
00:09:48,139 --> 00:09:49,116
wait a minute.
250
00:09:49,140 --> 00:09:51,118
was i just defending lawndale?
251
00:09:51,142 --> 00:09:52,319
- you know, i think you were.
252
00:09:52,343 --> 00:09:54,421
- we never had
this conversation.
253
00:09:54,445 --> 00:09:56,190
- what conversation?
254
00:09:56,214 --> 00:09:59,393
- all this waving is making
my arm tired.
255
00:09:59,417 --> 00:10:01,161
isn't there something else
we can do?
256
00:10:01,185 --> 00:10:03,397
- there was, until someone
257
00:10:03,421 --> 00:10:05,532
handed out all our head shots
at once.
258
00:10:05,556 --> 00:10:06,634
- i didn't mean to.
259
00:10:06,658 --> 00:10:08,936
oh, i should have
paced myself better.
260
00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:11,038
- we should do something
that showcases
261
00:10:11,062 --> 00:10:13,373
our, like, charity
and stuff.
262
00:10:13,397 --> 00:10:14,675
- perhaps we could select
263
00:10:14,699 --> 00:10:16,810
a less fortunate girl
from the audience
264
00:10:16,834 --> 00:10:18,112
and give her a makeover.
265
00:10:18,136 --> 00:10:20,681
- that is such a good idea,
sandi.
266
00:10:20,705 --> 00:10:22,483
- maybe we should hop a float.
267
00:10:22,507 --> 00:10:24,151
we could see more people
that way,
268
00:10:24,175 --> 00:10:25,653
and more people
could see us.
269
00:10:25,677 --> 00:10:27,821
i don't hop floats.
270
00:10:27,845 --> 00:10:29,457
i don't hop.
271
00:10:29,481 --> 00:10:30,558
- come on, daria.
272
00:10:30,582 --> 00:10:32,159
you gotta embrace
the nightmare.
273
00:10:32,183 --> 00:10:33,827
don't you want to wave
to the crowd?
274
00:10:33,851 --> 00:10:35,529
- look, tom, i know
that you and jane
275
00:10:35,553 --> 00:10:37,298
see this whole thing
as a big joke,
276
00:10:37,322 --> 00:10:39,467
but that's not me.
277
00:10:40,625 --> 00:10:42,235
i stand corrected.
278
00:10:42,259 --> 00:10:44,738
this whole thing is a big joke.
279
00:10:44,762 --> 00:10:46,140
- um, quinn?
280
00:10:46,164 --> 00:10:49,743
isn't that your relative
or whatever walking toward us?
281
00:10:49,767 --> 00:10:51,011
- oh, no.
282
00:10:51,035 --> 00:10:53,113
okay, we need to speed up now.
283
00:10:53,137 --> 00:10:55,983
- okay, pull harder.
ow, my back!
284
00:10:56,007 --> 00:10:58,352
- this is perfect.
285
00:10:58,376 --> 00:11:00,588
we can make her over.
286
00:11:00,612 --> 00:11:04,425
- wow!
the crowd will be amazed.
287
00:11:04,449 --> 00:11:06,460
- wait, not that float.
288
00:11:06,484 --> 00:11:08,128
- daria, come on!
289
00:11:08,152 --> 00:11:09,996
don't leave me.
290
00:11:11,822 --> 00:11:14,056
daria!
291
00:11:15,827 --> 00:11:17,171
- okay, we looked.
292
00:11:17,195 --> 00:11:18,872
now, let's get down before...
293
00:11:18,896 --> 00:11:20,841
- we'll need to apply
some base.
294
00:11:20,865 --> 00:11:22,276
but first some pre-base.
295
00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:23,878
- do you want to use
my scrunchie?
296
00:11:23,902 --> 00:11:25,545
please use my scrunchie.
297
00:11:25,569 --> 00:11:30,918
- i'll take
the "before" picture.
298
00:11:30,942 --> 00:11:33,853
- call them off,
or i start hugging you.
299
00:11:33,877 --> 00:11:34,921
- you wouldn't dare!
300
00:11:34,945 --> 00:11:36,891
- try me.
301
00:11:36,915 --> 00:11:39,059
- isn't it great
how they keep electing us
302
00:11:39,083 --> 00:11:41,262
homecoming king and queen
every year?
303
00:11:41,286 --> 00:11:43,663
- yes, it's such a generous
and enlightened gesture.
304
00:11:43,687 --> 00:11:45,199
it completely makes up
305
00:11:45,223 --> 00:11:47,667
for the town's utter lack
of diversity, in my mind.
306
00:11:47,691 --> 00:11:48,903
- and we're playing into it.
307
00:11:48,927 --> 00:11:50,204
- damn college applications.
308
00:11:50,228 --> 00:11:51,839
- this is so humiliating.
309
00:11:51,863 --> 00:11:55,309
- this is so humiliating!
let go of me!
310
00:11:55,333 --> 00:11:57,911
- not until she holsters
that hair spray.
311
00:11:57,935 --> 00:12:00,347
- um, quinn's cousin
or whatever?
312
00:12:00,371 --> 00:12:02,549
could you just let us
pull your hair back?
313
00:12:02,573 --> 00:12:04,084
it won't, like, hurt.
314
00:12:04,108 --> 00:12:07,754
- that product was tested
on bunnies and kitties.
315
00:12:07,778 --> 00:12:09,757
- it was?
- duh.
316
00:12:09,781 --> 00:12:11,224
that's why we use it...
317
00:12:11,248 --> 00:12:14,094
so those cute animals
didn't suffer in vain.
318
00:12:14,118 --> 00:12:15,195
- oh.
319
00:12:15,219 --> 00:12:16,830
- you're a mean old witch.
320
00:12:16,854 --> 00:12:18,599
- i am not old.
- you're mean.
321
00:12:18,623 --> 00:12:19,733
- i am not old...
322
00:12:19,757 --> 00:12:21,334
- quinn, your friend
and her friends
323
00:12:21,358 --> 00:12:23,003
aren't getting into the spirit.
324
00:12:23,027 --> 00:12:24,638
- they shouldn't even
be up here.
325
00:12:24,662 --> 00:12:25,839
- there's a news flash.
326
00:12:25,863 --> 00:12:27,607
we're looking for tad's parents.
327
00:12:27,631 --> 00:12:28,675
have you seen them?
328
00:12:28,699 --> 00:12:30,444
- no.
now, get down.
329
00:12:30,468 --> 00:12:33,080
- come on, tad.
enough of this ivory tower.
330
00:12:33,104 --> 00:12:34,381
back to the streets.
331
00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:37,084
- you don't respect
other species' rights.
332
00:12:37,108 --> 00:12:39,074
- shove it, veggie boy.
333
00:12:40,678 --> 00:12:44,191
- that girl just doesn't know
what's good for her.
334
00:12:44,215 --> 00:12:46,126
- tell me about it.
335
00:12:46,150 --> 00:12:47,594
- wait till i tell my parents
336
00:12:47,618 --> 00:12:52,532
i was on a real live float
and i met an animal abuser.
337
00:12:52,556 --> 00:12:53,767
- uh-oh.
338
00:12:53,791 --> 00:12:56,370
the animals are about to exact
their revenge.
339
00:12:56,394 --> 00:12:58,872
- here we go, lawndale!
here we go!
340
00:12:58,896 --> 00:13:01,808
- didn't i just leave you
for dead a while ago?
341
00:13:01,832 --> 00:13:02,809
beat it.
342
00:13:02,833 --> 00:13:04,778
- come on, let's have a cheer!
343
00:13:04,802 --> 00:13:06,213
- she said beat it, leo.
344
00:13:06,237 --> 00:13:07,314
- wow.
345
00:13:07,338 --> 00:13:08,815
that was the modern equivalent
346
00:13:08,839 --> 00:13:11,252
of laying your cape
over a puddle of water for me.
347
00:13:11,276 --> 00:13:13,053
- well, i don't know you
well enough
348
00:13:13,077 --> 00:13:14,555
to wear my cape
around you.
349
00:13:14,579 --> 00:13:17,791
wait a minute;
was that a smile i just saw?
350
00:13:17,815 --> 00:13:18,959
- a twitch.
351
00:13:18,983 --> 00:13:20,560
more of a tic, really.
352
00:13:20,584 --> 00:13:22,796
- i knew you were having fun.
why hide it?
353
00:13:22,820 --> 00:13:24,765
you need to learn
how to laugh out loud
354
00:13:24,789 --> 00:13:26,800
at the ridiculous horror
of all this.
355
00:13:26,824 --> 00:13:28,335
look, cheerleaders!
356
00:13:28,359 --> 00:13:30,236
- the lions can't be beat!
357
00:13:30,260 --> 00:13:31,872
they're lightning on their feet!
358
00:13:31,896 --> 00:13:34,040
they're the best team
on our street
359
00:13:34,064 --> 00:13:37,977
or lots of other streets.
he touched her butt.
360
00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:39,279
did anyone else see?
361
00:13:39,303 --> 00:13:40,614
he touched her butt!
362
00:13:40,638 --> 00:13:42,882
okay, mr. busy hands.
363
00:13:42,906 --> 00:13:44,518
let's see how your team does
364
00:13:44,542 --> 00:13:47,409
without cheerleaders
to back you up.
365
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:50,924
- uh-oh!
366
00:13:50,948 --> 00:13:52,226
- they're coming right for us!
367
00:13:52,250 --> 00:13:53,827
turn, turn!
368
00:13:53,851 --> 00:13:56,786
- it's not designed
to turn so fast.
369
00:14:04,161 --> 00:14:05,572
- wow.
370
00:14:05,596 --> 00:14:07,140
- it's like the hindenburg.
371
00:14:07,164 --> 00:14:10,510
- oh, the lack of humanity.
372
00:14:14,939 --> 00:14:16,783
- this is magnificent.
373
00:14:16,807 --> 00:14:19,253
when homecoming parades
turn hellish.
374
00:14:19,277 --> 00:14:21,187
- now aren't you glad
you were here to see this?
375
00:14:21,211 --> 00:14:22,989
- well, i definitely understand
376
00:14:23,013 --> 00:14:25,526
why you wanted
to share this with jane.
377
00:14:25,550 --> 00:14:26,727
sorry you never hooked up.
378
00:14:26,751 --> 00:14:27,927
- it's okay.
379
00:14:27,951 --> 00:14:30,063
by now she'd be so busy
snapping pictures,
380
00:14:30,087 --> 00:14:31,531
she'd forget
i was even here.
381
00:14:31,555 --> 00:14:32,632
you know how she is.
382
00:14:32,656 --> 00:14:34,368
- yeah, i know how she is.
383
00:14:34,392 --> 00:14:37,036
- thanks for getting lost
in the moment with me.
384
00:14:37,060 --> 00:14:39,673
- um, you're welcome?
385
00:14:39,697 --> 00:14:40,774
- heh.
386
00:14:40,798 --> 00:14:42,776
what do you think
of all this, tad?
387
00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:45,178
tad?
tad?
388
00:14:45,202 --> 00:14:47,080
- oh, no.
- he couldn't have gone far.
389
00:14:47,104 --> 00:14:48,771
- did we pass any windmills?
390
00:14:56,681 --> 00:14:58,292
- tad?
tad gupty?
391
00:14:58,316 --> 00:14:59,760
- i was holding his hand last,
daria.
392
00:14:59,784 --> 00:15:00,994
i'll take responsibility.
393
00:15:01,018 --> 00:15:02,796
- maybe we should
start waving again.
394
00:15:02,820 --> 00:15:04,598
- why play
into this stupid charade
395
00:15:04,622 --> 00:15:05,732
any more than we have to?
396
00:15:05,756 --> 00:15:07,200
- we don't have to do anything.
397
00:15:07,224 --> 00:15:09,068
hell, we don't have to be
up here.
398
00:15:09,092 --> 00:15:10,504
- that's actually a good point.
399
00:15:10,528 --> 00:15:12,928
what's the worst
they could do to us?
400
00:15:17,401 --> 00:15:18,378
- what happened?
401
00:15:18,402 --> 00:15:19,779
- oh, what the hell.
402
00:15:19,803 --> 00:15:22,249
we may be tokens, but we're
damn good-looking ones.
403
00:15:22,273 --> 00:15:23,650
- can't argue with that.
404
00:15:23,674 --> 00:15:25,719
hey, is that daria?
405
00:15:25,743 --> 00:15:28,088
- what's she doing
at a homecoming parade?
406
00:15:28,112 --> 00:15:30,223
- tad?
tad?
407
00:15:30,247 --> 00:15:31,892
i can't believe this.
408
00:15:31,916 --> 00:15:33,026
- hey, it could be worse.
409
00:15:33,050 --> 00:15:34,127
- let's see.
410
00:15:34,151 --> 00:15:35,361
in the past half-hour,
411
00:15:35,385 --> 00:15:37,898
i've lost the chance
to make 20 bucks,
412
00:15:37,922 --> 00:15:40,333
lost my dignity on a float,
and, oh, yeah,
413
00:15:40,357 --> 00:15:42,402
i lost a seven-year-old child.
414
00:15:42,426 --> 00:15:44,738
- weren't you also carrying
some toilet paper before?
415
00:15:44,762 --> 00:15:47,607
- yeah.
okay, now i'm angry.
416
00:15:47,631 --> 00:15:48,842
- daria! tom!
417
00:15:48,866 --> 00:15:50,611
i found my parents.
418
00:15:50,635 --> 00:15:51,979
they were looking for me.
419
00:15:52,003 --> 00:15:54,047
- of course we were looking
for you, honey.
420
00:15:54,071 --> 00:15:55,415
we were so worried.
421
00:15:55,439 --> 00:15:58,652
daria, tad told us all
about how you stayed with him.
422
00:15:58,676 --> 00:16:00,153
- how can we ever repay you?
423
00:16:00,177 --> 00:16:02,289
- i hear uncut diamonds
are as good as cash
424
00:16:02,313 --> 00:16:03,756
on the open market.
425
00:16:05,216 --> 00:16:07,294
- yes, well, thank you, daria.
426
00:16:07,318 --> 00:16:08,595
the next time you baby-sit,
427
00:16:08,619 --> 00:16:10,463
we'll be sure to have
some extra carrot sticks
428
00:16:10,487 --> 00:16:12,065
in the fridge just for you.
429
00:16:12,089 --> 00:16:13,934
- come on, honey.
daria here is a hero.
430
00:16:13,958 --> 00:16:15,902
i say we get her
some dried fruit.
431
00:16:15,926 --> 00:16:17,637
- my cup runneth over.
432
00:16:17,661 --> 00:16:20,440
- mom, dad!
we're missing the parade.
433
00:16:20,464 --> 00:16:22,575
- well, i guess we'd better
find a good spot.
434
00:16:22,599 --> 00:16:23,977
thanks again, daria.
435
00:16:24,001 --> 00:16:27,514
- um, this is where
i saw jane before,
436
00:16:27,538 --> 00:16:28,781
but she's not here now.
437
00:16:28,805 --> 00:16:29,916
- we've done what we can.
438
00:16:29,940 --> 00:16:31,251
i wouldn't stress about it.
439
00:16:31,275 --> 00:16:32,652
we're having a good time, right?
440
00:16:32,676 --> 00:16:34,655
- help... me!
441
00:16:34,679 --> 00:16:36,389
- not you again.
- remember us?
442
00:16:36,413 --> 00:16:38,958
we're the ones who don't enjoy
your hilarious antics.
443
00:16:38,982 --> 00:16:41,694
- can't... breathe.
- what's he saying?
444
00:16:41,718 --> 00:16:45,732
- it's either "canned beef"
or "can't breathe."
445
00:16:45,756 --> 00:16:47,901
the latter.
446
00:16:47,925 --> 00:16:51,238
- hello? where am i?
oh.
447
00:16:51,262 --> 00:16:53,106
- i can't believe it.
it's mr. o'neill.
448
00:16:53,130 --> 00:16:54,941
- and he would have gotten
away with it
449
00:16:54,965 --> 00:16:56,409
if it weren't
for us meddling kids.
450
00:16:56,433 --> 00:16:57,610
- oh, my.
451
00:16:57,634 --> 00:17:01,214
whenever i cut loose,
i always go overboard.
452
00:17:01,238 --> 00:17:02,882
oh.
453
00:17:02,906 --> 00:17:05,319
- get going!
- we can't.
454
00:17:05,343 --> 00:17:06,787
- the parade
stopped moving again.
455
00:17:06,811 --> 00:17:08,622
- we can't just
stay here forever.
456
00:17:08,646 --> 00:17:11,391
the same people have been
staring at us for too long.
457
00:17:11,415 --> 00:17:13,961
- it's like looking
into the sun.
458
00:17:13,985 --> 00:17:16,029
it's, like, really pretty,
459
00:17:16,053 --> 00:17:20,433
but if you do it for too long,
you get wrinkles.
460
00:17:20,457 --> 00:17:22,402
- yeah.
it kind of hurts too.
461
00:17:22,426 --> 00:17:25,894
- move!
move, you big, ugly vehicles!
462
00:17:29,132 --> 00:17:31,478
- ew!
463
00:17:31,502 --> 00:17:32,746
- this is gross.
464
00:17:32,770 --> 00:17:33,846
- ugh!
465
00:17:33,870 --> 00:17:35,882
- i don't understand.
466
00:17:35,906 --> 00:17:37,650
maybe the electric blanket
467
00:17:37,674 --> 00:17:39,419
is putting undue stress
on the battery.
468
00:17:39,443 --> 00:17:42,222
- i don't care what
your excuse is, don guano.
469
00:17:42,246 --> 00:17:44,491
you need to roll this car
out of the way right now.
470
00:17:44,515 --> 00:17:47,594
- that's the spirit.
let your blood boil.
471
00:17:47,618 --> 00:17:48,828
- you're holding up the parade.
472
00:17:48,852 --> 00:17:50,730
now, get out of here,
or we put on the cuffs.
473
00:17:50,754 --> 00:17:54,067
feisty.
474
00:17:54,091 --> 00:17:56,269
ow!
475
00:17:56,293 --> 00:17:58,504
ah!
476
00:17:58,528 --> 00:17:59,706
- they're gonna kill him.
477
00:17:59,730 --> 00:18:01,708
- let's not get our hopes up.
478
00:18:05,669 --> 00:18:08,447
- thanks, daria.
it's for the yearbook.
479
00:18:08,471 --> 00:18:11,017
i'm getting some really great
pictures of couples tonight.
480
00:18:11,041 --> 00:18:12,185
- no, ted, we're not a...
481
00:18:12,209 --> 00:18:13,452
- i don't even
go to this school.
482
00:18:13,476 --> 00:18:15,655
- well, it's about
stinking time.
483
00:18:15,679 --> 00:18:17,724
- we've been looking all over
for you.
484
00:18:17,748 --> 00:18:19,292
- what do you mean,
"been looking"?
485
00:18:19,316 --> 00:18:21,161
- tom and i ran
into each other.
486
00:18:21,185 --> 00:18:23,196
we've been up and down
the entire parade route.
487
00:18:23,220 --> 00:18:25,398
- together?
and yet no torn clothes?
488
00:18:25,422 --> 00:18:27,600
no blood?
no missing organs?
489
00:18:27,624 --> 00:18:29,569
- no, we got along
pretty well.
490
00:18:29,593 --> 00:18:30,704
right, daria?
491
00:18:30,728 --> 00:18:32,205
- right, i guess.
492
00:18:32,229 --> 00:18:33,873
- i said to meet
at drugs 'n' stuff.
493
00:18:33,897 --> 00:18:35,508
where were you, you big dope?
494
00:18:35,532 --> 00:18:37,243
- no, you said at the pharmacy.
495
00:18:37,267 --> 00:18:39,279
- he was at the other one,
waiting for you.
496
00:18:39,303 --> 00:18:41,548
that's where i met him...
ran into him.
497
00:18:41,572 --> 00:18:43,183
- mm, i tried there too.
498
00:18:43,207 --> 00:18:45,652
you guys must have left
before i got there, i guess.
499
00:18:45,676 --> 00:18:47,487
- i guess.
- well, come on.
500
00:18:47,511 --> 00:18:50,345
let's get some pizza
and compare battle scars.
501
00:18:53,217 --> 00:18:55,195
come on, daria.
502
00:18:55,219 --> 00:18:56,730
- oh, my gosh!
this is so much fun!
503
00:18:56,754 --> 00:18:58,965
oops, sorry.
504
00:18:58,989 --> 00:19:01,033
- we're having a paint fight.
whoo!
505
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:03,303
- oh, no, civilian casualties.
506
00:19:03,327 --> 00:19:04,805
you look great, daria.
507
00:19:04,829 --> 00:19:06,039
- i can't believe this.
508
00:19:06,063 --> 00:19:07,340
are you okay?
- i'm...
509
00:19:07,364 --> 00:19:08,442
- here, take my jacket.
510
00:19:08,466 --> 00:19:10,844
wish i'd worn my cape.
- huh?
511
00:19:10,868 --> 00:19:11,945
- no, i'm fine.
512
00:19:11,969 --> 00:19:13,614
really, i've always wanted
513
00:19:13,638 --> 00:19:15,515
an amazing technicolor
dreamcoat.
514
00:19:15,539 --> 00:19:17,584
- i've trained her well.
never fear paint.
515
00:19:17,608 --> 00:19:18,719
- come on, daria.
516
00:19:18,743 --> 00:19:20,053
we'll stop by your house,
517
00:19:20,077 --> 00:19:22,022
and you can shower and change
before we head out.
518
00:19:22,046 --> 00:19:23,523
- no, come out like that,
daria.
519
00:19:23,547 --> 00:19:24,891
shake up your image.
520
00:19:24,915 --> 00:19:27,126
- you know, why don't you two
just go on ahead?
521
00:19:27,150 --> 00:19:29,128
i think i'll skip
the pizza tonight.
522
00:19:29,152 --> 00:19:31,464
i need to go talk to pharaoh
about his dreams.
523
00:19:31,488 --> 00:19:33,300
- aw, come on.
- yeah, come on, daria.
524
00:19:33,324 --> 00:19:35,001
- i'm kind of beat.
525
00:19:35,025 --> 00:19:36,936
- okay, see you around.
526
00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:38,993
- i'll call you later.
527
00:19:42,700 --> 00:19:45,545
- well, i never would have
believed it.
528
00:19:45,569 --> 00:19:46,946
look at you, daria,
529
00:19:46,970 --> 00:19:49,382
all decked out
in the lawndale colors.
530
00:19:49,406 --> 00:19:51,485
i knew if you just gave
school spirit a chance,
531
00:19:51,509 --> 00:19:52,819
you'd like it.
532
00:19:52,843 --> 00:19:54,053
go, lawndale!
533
00:19:54,077 --> 00:19:55,321
right, daria?
534
00:19:55,345 --> 00:19:57,356
see you in class.
535
00:19:57,380 --> 00:19:59,314
- rah.
536
00:20:00,451 --> 00:20:01,795
- daria?
537
00:20:01,819 --> 00:20:03,095
daria?
538
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:05,699
please come home, daria.
539
00:20:05,723 --> 00:20:08,234
come on; i've read this article
about the olsen twins
540
00:20:08,258 --> 00:20:09,836
five times.
541
00:20:09,860 --> 00:20:12,605
i knew i should've made it
30 bucks.
542
00:20:12,629 --> 00:20:13,740
damn it!
543
00:20:13,764 --> 00:20:16,442
35736
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.