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1
00:00:01,597 --> 00:00:04,861
# It seems today
that all you see #
2
00:00:04,961 --> 00:00:08,247
# Is violence in movies
and sex on TV #
3
00:00:08,331 --> 00:00:11,733
# But where are those
good old-fashioned values #
4
00:00:11,785 --> 00:00:14,703
# On which we used to rely? #
5
00:00:15,071 --> 00:00:18,324
# Lucky there's a family guy #
6
00:00:18,391 --> 00:00:21,527
# Lucky there's a man
who positively can do #
7
00:00:21,594 --> 00:00:23,128
# All the things that make us #
8
00:00:23,213 --> 00:00:24,546
# Laugh and cry #
9
00:00:24,597 --> 00:00:26,312
# He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! #
10
00:00:26,637 --> 00:00:30,137
# Family Guy 10x23 #
Internal Affairs
Original Air Date on May 20, 2012
11
00:00:30,138 --> 00:00:33,638
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
12
00:00:34,524 --> 00:00:37,059
And now,
Quahog Channel 5 presents:
13
00:00:37,127 --> 00:00:39,328
"Movie and a Bath
with a Guy Named Lou."
14
00:00:39,396 --> 00:00:42,054
Hey. It's Saturday night,
and you know what that means.
15
00:00:42,089 --> 00:00:43,198
We're gonna take a bath
16
00:00:43,266 --> 00:00:46,385
and watch the 1984
interesting movie, Gremlins.
17
00:00:46,453 --> 00:00:48,125
Now, the Gremlins are funny.
18
00:00:48,171 --> 00:00:49,765
I don't know
if those things are puppets
19
00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:51,923
or they put costumes
on dogs or something,
20
00:00:51,991 --> 00:00:54,096
but let's press "play"
and find out, huh?
21
00:00:54,377 --> 00:00:56,945
You can't get them things
wet, by the way,
22
00:00:57,013 --> 00:00:59,648
but don't worry,
this don't affect that.
23
00:01:02,151 --> 00:01:05,087
We interrupt this program for some
breaking news, which is why
24
00:01:05,154 --> 00:01:08,357
I'm still chewing a bagel.
Mmmm...
25
00:01:08,424 --> 00:01:09,459
Just-just roll the footage.
26
00:01:09,559 --> 00:01:11,560
A major drug bust
in Quahog today
27
00:01:11,628 --> 00:01:14,606
as police seized
over 100 kilos of cocaine.
28
00:01:14,764 --> 00:01:16,930
Okay, I'm done.
That's right, Joyce. Apparently,
29
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:20,031
there were 100 kilos of cocaine
right here in Quahog,
30
00:01:20,066 --> 00:01:22,034
and yet my guy can't get dick.
31
00:01:22,113 --> 00:01:25,690
Singled out for special recognition
in orchestrating today's drug bust
32
00:01:25,725 --> 00:01:27,646
was Officer Joe Swanson.
33
00:01:27,735 --> 00:01:30,439
It feels good to know that,
thanks to me and my colleagues,
34
00:01:30,513 --> 00:01:32,814
a lot fewer people
will be injecting cocaine
35
00:01:32,882 --> 00:01:34,750
into their penises tonight.
36
00:01:34,817 --> 00:01:36,952
- Is that a thing?
- It's a great thing.
37
00:01:39,172 --> 00:01:40,472
- Great job, Joe!
- Way to go!
38
00:01:40,556 --> 00:01:41,506
There he is!
39
00:01:41,591 --> 00:01:42,991
Hey, thanks, everybody.
40
00:01:43,059 --> 00:01:45,460
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, Joe, I saw you on TV.
41
00:01:45,528 --> 00:01:47,071
Now I have to go
through the five stages
42
00:01:47,130 --> 00:01:48,297
of having a celebrity friend.
43
00:01:48,365 --> 00:01:50,332
Oh, you're on TV!
That's so cool!
44
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:51,867
We're going right
to the top together.
45
00:01:51,935 --> 00:01:53,669
Oh, you think
you're better than us, huh?
46
00:01:53,737 --> 00:01:56,271
Just one ****** stroke of luck,
and you're there and I'm here.
47
00:01:56,339 --> 00:01:58,823
I'm sorry I overreacted.
Look, you got to be careful.
48
00:01:58,858 --> 00:02:00,509
You need someone looking out
for you, who knows you.
49
00:02:00,577 --> 00:02:02,511
Someone you can trust.
Give me some money!
50
00:02:02,579 --> 00:02:04,880
Man, that was some pretty
impressive police work, Joe.
51
00:02:04,948 --> 00:02:06,548
Thanks, Quagmire.
I'll be honest,
52
00:02:06,616 --> 00:02:09,051
it was nice to be acknowledged
by the chief for once.
53
00:02:09,119 --> 00:02:10,535
Usually, he's just
reminding me
54
00:02:10,594 --> 00:02:12,654
that whatever punk
I'm roughing up ain't worth it.
55
00:02:12,705 --> 00:02:15,475
You son of a bitch!
I ought to kill you right here!
56
00:02:16,025 --> 00:02:18,494
Hey! This punk's
not worth it.
57
00:02:18,561 --> 00:02:19,828
You're right.
58
00:02:22,365 --> 00:02:23,866
You're not worth it.
59
00:02:26,636 --> 00:02:29,688
So, listen, if you guys
aren't doing anything later,
60
00:02:29,756 --> 00:02:32,558
the chief's throwing me a little
party to celebrate my bust.
61
00:02:32,625 --> 00:02:34,927
I am going to let Quagmire
answer first.
62
00:02:34,994 --> 00:02:36,361
- Yeah, I'll go.
- I shall go, too.
63
00:02:36,429 --> 00:02:38,578
Oh, great. I'll see
you guys tonight.
64
00:02:43,035 --> 00:02:45,437
Oh, God, buddy,
I'm sorry. You okay?
65
00:03:05,474 --> 00:03:07,175
You bastard!
66
00:03:32,368 --> 00:03:34,919
Well, now I've seen
Woodrow Wilson naked.
67
00:08:08,410 --> 00:08:10,662
Hey, Bonnie, I made a
major drug bust today.
68
00:08:10,730 --> 00:08:12,364
The biggest one the
force has ever seen.
69
00:08:12,431 --> 00:08:13,965
That's great, Joe.
70
00:08:14,033 --> 00:08:17,502
You don't seem very excited.
I mean, this is a huge deal for me.
71
00:08:17,570 --> 00:08:19,804
The chief is even throwing
me a party tonight.
72
00:08:19,872 --> 00:08:23,241
I don't know if I can take another
evening of sympathetic eye contact
73
00:08:23,309 --> 00:08:25,243
from all the other wives.
74
00:08:26,779 --> 00:08:29,548
Well, just so you know,
this is a really big deal.
75
00:08:29,615 --> 00:08:32,984
They even asked me to be a guest
on Muy Importante!
76
00:08:36,806 --> 00:08:39,241
Muy Importante!
77
00:08:42,828 --> 00:08:45,463
Muy Importante!
78
00:08:49,168 --> 00:08:52,003
Muy Importante!
79
00:08:52,391 --> 00:08:55,474
Muy Importante!
80
00:08:55,741 --> 00:08:58,343
Muy Importante!
81
00:08:58,411 --> 00:09:01,746
A donkey just bit
a child in the hallway.
82
00:09:06,485 --> 00:09:08,687
Wow, I've never been
to a cop bar before.
83
00:09:08,754 --> 00:09:09,955
Yeah, look at the bartender.
84
00:09:10,022 --> 00:09:11,790
I bet working here,
she's one of those women
85
00:09:11,857 --> 00:09:13,925
who's tough as nails
and good at giving sass.
86
00:09:15,795 --> 00:09:16,823
What will it be, fellas?
87
00:09:16,896 --> 00:09:19,698
I'd like to cram both your boobs
into a martini glass.
88
00:09:22,902 --> 00:09:24,715
I-I think she's just
a normal woman.
89
00:09:24,804 --> 00:09:26,471
To Joe Swanson!
90
00:09:26,539 --> 00:09:29,272
And the biggest drug bust
in the history of Quahog!
91
00:09:32,595 --> 00:09:35,714
Officer Swanson, I just wanted
to say congratulations.
92
00:09:35,781 --> 00:09:37,349
I'm Nora. I just
joined the force.
93
00:09:37,416 --> 00:09:38,623
Nice to meet you.
94
00:09:38,673 --> 00:09:40,602
Wow, I've heard
so much about you.
95
00:09:40,670 --> 00:09:42,404
You're like a legend
at the academy.
96
00:09:42,472 --> 00:09:44,106
Is it true you got straight A's
97
00:09:44,173 --> 00:09:46,040
in Officer Henderson's
Overintensity Workshop?
98
00:09:46,092 --> 00:09:47,692
You're damn right I did!
99
00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:49,694
Well, you did some
great work today.
100
00:09:49,762 --> 00:09:52,731
And I mean regular-person great,
not just wheelchair-person great.
101
00:09:52,799 --> 00:09:54,566
Yeah, I guess.
102
00:09:54,634 --> 00:09:57,068
You seem a little distracted.
Is everything okay?
103
00:09:57,136 --> 00:09:59,638
Yeah, sorry,
I was just thinking about...
104
00:09:59,705 --> 00:10:02,207
someone should have come
tonight, but they didn't.
105
00:10:02,575 --> 00:10:05,277
- Ah, it's nothing.
- That's good.
106
00:10:05,344 --> 00:10:07,546
- Hey, Officer Swanson?
- Yeah?
107
00:10:07,613 --> 00:10:10,015
You know how they say
never meet your heroes?
108
00:10:10,082 --> 00:10:12,200
Well, they don't say anything
about kissing them.
109
00:10:13,286 --> 00:10:14,920
Whoa!
110
00:10:14,987 --> 00:10:16,755
Geez, every cop in town is here.
111
00:10:16,823 --> 00:10:19,291
I know. Who do you think is
taking care of the city?
112
00:10:19,883 --> 00:10:20,860
No.
113
00:10:21,060 --> 00:10:22,278
No.
114
00:10:22,478 --> 00:10:23,770
No.
115
00:10:23,980 --> 00:10:25,246
No.
116
00:10:27,133 --> 00:10:28,500
What the hell? Come on!
117
00:10:28,568 --> 00:10:30,335
No drive. Is wet.
118
00:10:37,083 --> 00:10:38,800
Hey-hey, fun party
last night, Joe.
119
00:10:38,868 --> 00:10:40,669
You guys, I got something
to tell you.
120
00:10:40,737 --> 00:10:43,405
The weirdest thing happened
to me at that party.
121
00:10:43,473 --> 00:10:45,507
I got kissed
by this chick cop.
122
00:10:45,575 --> 00:10:47,909
No way! What's she look like?
Is she hot?
123
00:10:47,977 --> 00:10:49,344
Well, I don't know. Uh...
124
00:10:49,412 --> 00:10:51,546
Is Elizabeth Perkins hot?
125
00:10:51,614 --> 00:10:55,150
I... I, uh...
I-I don't... I don't know.
126
00:10:55,218 --> 00:10:57,052
Way to go, Joe.
Did you bang her?
127
00:10:57,120 --> 00:11:00,522
What? Of course not, Quagmire.
I mean, I'm a married man.
128
00:11:00,590 --> 00:11:02,124
I could never cheat on Bonnie.
129
00:11:02,191 --> 00:11:04,392
Well, under normal circumstances,
you'd be right to say that,
130
00:11:04,460 --> 00:11:06,862
but in this case, cheating
would be the only fair thing.
131
00:11:06,930 --> 00:11:08,530
What? What are you
talking about?
132
00:11:08,598 --> 00:11:11,331
Come on. Didn't Bonnie
have that affair in Paris?
133
00:11:11,366 --> 00:11:13,435
Oh, yeah. I don't want
to talk about that.
134
00:11:13,503 --> 00:11:15,303
Joe, how can I put this
delicately?
135
00:11:15,371 --> 00:11:19,254
He used his stinky French
wiener to defile her.
136
00:11:19,289 --> 00:11:22,495
Wow. That's a...
real hit above the belt.
137
00:11:22,530 --> 00:11:24,913
But I'm still not sure that's
a reason to betray Bonnie.
138
00:11:24,981 --> 00:11:27,349
Come on, Joe. Sleeping with
this girl wi even things up.
139
00:11:27,416 --> 00:11:30,343
You can't have that kind of
imbalance in your relationship.
140
00:11:30,378 --> 00:11:33,165
In fact, you owe it to Bonnie
to have sex with this woman.
141
00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:34,072
It's for the good
of your marriage.
142
00:11:34,173 --> 00:11:35,557
Yeah, you should go for it, Joe.
143
00:11:35,625 --> 00:11:37,526
Secrets are what
keep a marriage fresh.
144
00:11:37,593 --> 00:11:39,735
I have a CB radio
in the basement.
145
00:11:39,770 --> 00:11:42,311
I go down there a couple times
a week to have CB sex.
146
00:11:42,346 --> 00:11:43,331
Lois has no idea.
147
00:11:43,399 --> 00:11:45,300
Breaker breaker one-nine.
What's your 20?
148
00:11:49,472 --> 00:11:52,641
Ah, it's so hot
just knowing you're in a truck.
149
00:11:56,678 --> 00:11:57,762
Good morning, Officer Swanson.
150
00:11:57,830 --> 00:11:59,464
Oh, hey... Nora.
151
00:11:59,732 --> 00:12:01,777
- Uh, listen, I...
- It's okay, Joe.
152
00:12:01,812 --> 00:12:03,077
You don't need to explain.
153
00:12:03,112 --> 00:12:05,921
I stepped over the line at the bar
last night. I'm... I'm sorry.
154
00:12:05,988 --> 00:12:09,524
It's not that I don't find you
attractive. I do. I just...
155
00:12:09,592 --> 00:12:12,911
- I'm married and...
- I get it. I totally understand, Joe.
156
00:12:14,594 --> 00:12:16,114
Excuse me. Hello?
157
00:12:16,182 --> 00:12:17,015
Joe?
158
00:12:17,083 --> 00:12:18,049
Bonnie?
159
00:12:18,117 --> 00:12:21,207
Oh. I-I meant to call
someone else.
160
00:12:21,242 --> 00:12:22,089
Oh.
161
00:12:22,124 --> 00:12:22,934
Yeah.
162
00:12:22,989 --> 00:12:24,506
So, how is everything?
163
00:12:29,595 --> 00:12:31,596
Didn't Bonnie
have that affair in Paris?
164
00:12:31,664 --> 00:12:34,432
He used his stinky
French wiener to defile her.
165
00:12:34,500 --> 00:12:36,468
Didn't Bonnie
have that affair in Paris?
166
00:12:36,535 --> 00:12:39,704
He used his stinky
French wiener to defile her.
167
00:12:40,072 --> 00:12:42,040
Hey, Quagmire,
we're in Joe's head.
168
00:12:42,075 --> 00:12:44,592
Hey, let's mess with him. I'm going
to leave a fart trapped in here.
169
00:12:47,246 --> 00:12:48,367
All right,
let's get out of here.
170
00:12:51,216 --> 00:12:52,967
- I want you.
- I want you too.
171
00:12:53,018 --> 00:12:56,321
Come on. I have a little
place we can go to.
172
00:12:56,388 --> 00:12:59,490
Wow. I've never seen a sofa
in a bathroom stall before.
173
00:12:59,558 --> 00:13:01,526
Well, I'm the only
one who comes in here,
174
00:13:01,594 --> 00:13:03,161
so I figured I'd
make it my own.
175
00:13:03,229 --> 00:13:04,529
How are you enjoying
your steak?
176
00:13:04,597 --> 00:13:06,130
Mmm. It's delicious.
177
00:13:06,198 --> 00:13:08,099
Let me put another
log on the fire.
178
00:13:09,401 --> 00:13:10,535
Thanks, Joe.
179
00:13:10,603 --> 00:13:12,370
It was getting
a little chilly in here.
180
00:13:12,438 --> 00:13:14,038
That's 'cause you're
all the way over there.
181
00:13:14,106 --> 00:13:16,140
Well, let me fix that.
182
00:13:17,709 --> 00:13:20,144
- Oh, Joe.
- Oh, Nora.
183
00:13:20,212 --> 00:13:22,204
- Did you bring protection?
- Oh, don't worry.
184
00:13:22,268 --> 00:13:23,748
Nothing comes out of the front.
185
00:13:27,853 --> 00:13:29,921
What a great day
for Joe and Bonnie.
186
00:13:29,989 --> 00:13:33,224
This is Kevin's first birthday
since he came home from Iraq.
187
00:13:33,292 --> 00:13:35,026
Why does Kevin always sit
at the bus stop,
188
00:13:35,094 --> 00:13:36,561
but never gets on a bus?
189
00:13:36,629 --> 00:13:37,896
Please don't bring that up.
190
00:13:37,963 --> 00:13:39,764
Don't bring
anything he does up.
191
00:13:40,032 --> 00:13:42,867
Hey, you guys.
You're right on time.
192
00:13:42,935 --> 00:13:45,686
Kevin just woke up screaming
from his afternoon nap.
193
00:13:45,738 --> 00:13:48,406
Mom, it's my birthday,
and you invited your friends.
194
00:13:48,474 --> 00:13:50,275
All yours are dead!
195
00:13:50,642 --> 00:13:53,544
Hey, guys. Uh, can I talk
to you for a second?
196
00:13:53,612 --> 00:13:54,913
I did something terrible.
197
00:13:54,980 --> 00:13:56,915
Ah, hey, we've all
done terrible things.
198
00:13:58,117 --> 00:13:59,254
Attention, everyone.
199
00:13:59,289 --> 00:14:03,104
The plane is sinking, so I need you all
to proceed onto the floating slide.
200
00:14:04,873 --> 00:14:06,324
Dear airplane people,
201
00:14:06,392 --> 00:14:08,793
I owe you one floating slide.
202
00:14:08,861 --> 00:14:10,962
And just so you know,
the guy stewardess
203
00:14:11,030 --> 00:14:12,964
was angry gay, not happy gay.
204
00:14:13,032 --> 00:14:14,432
- What does it say?
- Nothing.
205
00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:16,360
Just instructions and stuff.
206
00:14:16,435 --> 00:14:18,052
Oh, my God. You actually
went through with it?
207
00:14:18,120 --> 00:14:19,020
How was it?
208
00:14:19,088 --> 00:14:20,255
I don't know, you guys.
209
00:14:20,322 --> 00:14:21,623
I thought I would feel better
210
00:14:21,690 --> 00:14:23,324
after I slept with Nora,
but I don't.
211
00:14:23,392 --> 00:14:25,059
I just feel really guilty.
212
00:14:25,427 --> 00:14:27,095
And I'm not mad
at Bonnie anymore;
213
00:14:27,162 --> 00:14:28,930
I'm just mad at myself.
214
00:14:28,998 --> 00:14:30,594
Guys, am I the only one
who thinks it's weird
215
00:14:30,666 --> 00:14:33,469
talking about Joe cheating on Bonnie
in front of their baby?
216
00:14:33,536 --> 00:14:37,024
I think we can all benefit from
a little strange now and then.
217
00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:38,389
I know I will.
218
00:14:40,308 --> 00:14:41,042
Uh-oh.
219
00:14:41,110 --> 00:14:42,810
- The baby monitor.
- Wha...?
220
00:14:42,878 --> 00:14:44,245
The baby monitor.
221
00:14:44,313 --> 00:14:45,647
You cheated on me?
222
00:14:45,714 --> 00:14:47,181
I-I, uh...
223
00:14:47,249 --> 00:14:49,050
You bastard!
224
00:14:49,318 --> 00:14:50,885
Bonnie, please.
225
00:14:50,953 --> 00:14:54,480
After all I do for you,
this is how you repay me?
226
00:14:54,537 --> 00:14:56,267
Well, how do you think
I felt when I found out
227
00:14:56,322 --> 00:14:57,956
you slept with that
French guy, huh?
228
00:14:58,010 --> 00:15:02,397
- I never slept with Francois.
- What? But Peter said...
229
00:15:02,464 --> 00:15:04,012
Lois, didn't you say
that Bonnie slept with him?
230
00:15:04,076 --> 00:15:06,312
No, Peter. I said she wanted to.
231
00:15:06,347 --> 00:15:08,270
- Damn it, Peter!
- Now, hold on.
232
00:15:08,330 --> 00:15:10,405
In my defense,
it is my experience
233
00:15:10,472 --> 00:15:12,974
that I am generally correct
about most things.
234
00:15:13,042 --> 00:15:14,609
You know what,
it doesn't matter.
235
00:15:14,677 --> 00:15:17,245
Bonnie's been driving me away
for some time now.
236
00:15:17,313 --> 00:15:19,247
What? Driving you away?
237
00:15:19,315 --> 00:15:23,051
Do you have any idea
how hard it is living with you?
238
00:15:23,118 --> 00:15:26,920
They still have one of those TVs
with the big, fat back.
239
00:15:26,989 --> 00:15:28,469
Maybe we should all leave.
240
00:15:28,537 --> 00:15:29,167
- No!
- No!
241
00:15:29,238 --> 00:15:32,086
Everyone stays. I want
this to be a disaster.
242
00:15:32,135 --> 00:15:34,092
'Cause this has been
a long time coming.
243
00:15:34,113 --> 00:15:36,264
You care about nothing
except yourself.
244
00:15:36,315 --> 00:15:37,649
You son of a bitch.
245
00:15:37,716 --> 00:15:40,902
I got a license to operate
a sex crane for you.
246
00:15:40,970 --> 00:15:43,121
And I got earplugs so I
could put up with that
247
00:15:43,189 --> 00:15:44,889
horrible voice of yours.
248
00:15:44,957 --> 00:15:47,425
I'm not an impressionist,
but you get the idea.
249
00:15:47,493 --> 00:15:51,796
I perform purification rituals
on my body after we have sex.
250
00:15:51,864 --> 00:15:54,532
I find it cleanses
the immeasurable sadness
251
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:56,467
of having lain with a wretch.
252
00:15:56,535 --> 00:15:59,170
- I want a divorce!
- You got it!
253
00:15:59,438 --> 00:16:01,306
Sorry. I opened
some of the gifts.
254
00:16:08,515 --> 00:16:10,234
Does the Swanson divorce
mean that
255
00:16:10,289 --> 00:16:12,397
I have to go live
with Grandma and Grandpa?
256
00:16:12,452 --> 00:16:15,405
No, Chris, it does not. That doesn't
even make any sense.
257
00:16:15,589 --> 00:16:18,908
Peter, I can't believe you would
encourage Joe to have an affair.
258
00:16:18,975 --> 00:16:21,794
- Look, Lois, it's in the Bible.
- What's in the Bible?
259
00:16:21,862 --> 00:16:24,964
I-I don't know. Doesn't that
always cover it somehow?
260
00:16:25,031 --> 00:16:28,601
Peter, you blew up their marriage.
This was a huge mistake.
261
00:16:28,668 --> 00:16:30,135
Well, we've all made mistakes.
262
00:16:33,689 --> 00:16:34,840
Eh.
263
00:16:38,245 --> 00:16:40,496
Why did the sign say
"not an exit"?
264
00:16:40,564 --> 00:16:42,665
It should have just said
"gorilla door."
265
00:16:47,720 --> 00:16:51,006
So, it's really over, huh?
After all these years?
266
00:16:51,074 --> 00:16:53,709
I'm afraid so.
But let's be honest, Peter.
267
00:16:53,777 --> 00:16:55,878
Bonnie and I seem
to have grown apart.
268
00:16:55,946 --> 00:16:59,064
Boy, I never would have seen
this day coming when we first met.
269
00:16:59,132 --> 00:17:01,708
"Africa" by Toto was playing.
270
00:17:02,185 --> 00:17:04,687
# #
271
00:17:06,723 --> 00:17:10,059
# I hear the drums
echoing tonight #
272
00:17:10,143 --> 00:17:12,394
# But she hears only whispers #
273
00:17:12,479 --> 00:17:16,382
# Of some quiet conversation #
274
00:17:18,735 --> 00:17:22,171
# I stopped an old man
along the way #
275
00:17:22,255 --> 00:17:25,324
# Hoping to find
some long forgotten words #
276
00:17:25,375 --> 00:17:28,533
# Or ancient melodies #
277
00:17:30,145 --> 00:17:33,365
# He turned to me as if to say #
278
00:17:33,416 --> 00:17:37,753
# "Hurry, boy,
it's waiting there for you" #
279
00:17:40,590 --> 00:17:45,594
# It's gonna take a lot
to drag me away from you #
280
00:17:45,679 --> 00:17:50,983
# There's nothing that a hundred
men or more could ever do #
281
00:17:51,050 --> 00:17:56,122
# I bless the rains
down in Africa #
282
00:17:56,189 --> 00:18:03,048
# Gonna take some time
to do the things we never had #
283
00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:04,746
# Ooh, ooh... #
284
00:18:13,489 --> 00:18:15,995
Lois, I know how to get
Joe and Bonnie back together.
285
00:18:16,030 --> 00:18:18,077
Joe just told me how
he and Bonnie met.
286
00:18:18,144 --> 00:18:22,131
So I figure, all we got to do is find a
way to recreate the magic of that night.
287
00:18:22,215 --> 00:18:24,683
Well, we better do something soon,
'cause I just talked to Bonnie
288
00:18:24,751 --> 00:18:27,570
- and she's already on D-Date.
- What the hell's D-Date?
289
00:18:27,637 --> 00:18:29,271
Diarrhea Date. It's filthy.
290
00:18:29,356 --> 00:18:32,720
But she found someone, and they're
doing whatever they do tomorrow.
291
00:18:32,759 --> 00:18:35,027
What the hell's
wrong with people?
292
00:18:36,763 --> 00:18:40,632
Thanks for inviting me to lunch, Lois,
but why are we eating at a strip club?
293
00:18:40,700 --> 00:18:42,835
I know the waitress here
from water aerobics.
294
00:18:42,902 --> 00:18:44,770
She said she'd
give us 20% off.
295
00:18:46,239 --> 00:18:48,106
All units, all units.
296
00:18:48,158 --> 00:18:49,908
We have a disturbance
at the Fuzzy Clam.
297
00:18:49,959 --> 00:18:52,461
This is Officer Swanson.
What's the problem?
298
00:18:52,545 --> 00:18:54,713
Well, one of the dancers
was dancing with a guy
299
00:18:54,781 --> 00:18:56,832
and saying, "You're my favorite,
you're my favorite,"
300
00:18:56,916 --> 00:18:58,981
but now she's dancing
with another guy.
301
00:18:59,016 --> 00:19:00,068
That's not a crime.
302
00:19:00,153 --> 00:19:01,470
Well, shouldn't it be?
303
00:19:01,554 --> 00:19:02,954
I'll be right there.
304
00:19:07,060 --> 00:19:09,328
("Africa" by Toto playing)
305
00:19:09,396 --> 00:19:12,514
Boy, I haven't heard this
song in a long time.
306
00:19:12,599 --> 00:19:14,483
Police! What's going on?
307
00:19:15,267 --> 00:19:17,636
- Bonnie?
- Joe?
308
00:19:17,687 --> 00:19:19,988
- What are you doing here?
- I'm here with Lois.
309
00:19:20,073 --> 00:19:21,407
What are you doing here?
310
00:19:21,474 --> 00:19:23,275
I got a call.
311
00:19:23,326 --> 00:19:26,275
Is that... is that
"Africa" by Toto?
312
00:19:26,310 --> 00:19:27,366
Yeah.
313
00:19:27,530 --> 00:19:30,196
- That's our song.
- It is.
314
00:19:31,506 --> 00:19:35,037
# But she hears only whispers
of some quiet... #
315
00:19:35,121 --> 00:19:37,456
Well, it seems like
things are fine here.
316
00:19:37,507 --> 00:19:41,593
Listen, Bonnie, I, uh...
I just want to say I'm sorry.
317
00:19:41,661 --> 00:19:44,329
I was a real ass,
and I miss you.
318
00:19:44,680 --> 00:19:46,131
I'm sorry, too.
319
00:19:46,182 --> 00:19:49,301
I know I haven't been
that easy to live with lately.
320
00:19:49,652 --> 00:19:50,941
Okay.
321
00:19:52,021 --> 00:19:54,657
Well, I'm going to go now.
322
00:19:55,308 --> 00:19:57,378
Joe, wait.
323
00:19:58,311 --> 00:20:00,896
You want a lap dance, mister?
324
00:20:03,032 --> 00:20:07,453
No. Sit down.
I'm giving you one.
325
00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:11,189
# The wild dogs
cry out in the night #
326
00:20:11,241 --> 00:20:13,041
# As they grow restless #
327
00:20:13,126 --> 00:20:17,629
# Longing for
some solitary company #
328
00:20:19,466 --> 00:20:22,251
- Oh, Joe.
- Oh, Bonnie.
329
00:20:22,335 --> 00:20:25,053
# He turned to me
as if to say... #
330
00:20:25,138 --> 00:20:26,922
Can you ever forgive me?
331
00:20:27,006 --> 00:20:28,707
It's going to take
some time, Joe.
332
00:20:28,758 --> 00:20:30,843
Rest of your life okay?
333
00:20:32,562 --> 00:20:37,599
# It's gonna take a lot
to drag me away from you #
334
00:20:37,684 --> 00:20:42,738
# There's nothing that a hundred
men or more could ever do #
335
00:20:42,822 --> 00:20:47,926
# I bless the rains
down in Africa... #
336
00:20:50,761 --> 00:20:54,126
== sync, corrected by elderman ==26297
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