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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,640
HOLLY: Come on, Boss Pro! Faster!
2
00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:06,960
For fuck's sake. Here comes
the big finisher. Under. Over.
3
00:00:08,640 --> 00:00:11,960
THEY GRUNT
Shabamala-a-a-am!
4
00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:14,960
GRUNTING
Pick up the pace!
5
00:00:14,960 --> 00:00:17,000
Remember, fun Holly died
back in Pollards.
6
00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:18,960
I'm your boss and I need results.
7
00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:20,960
SHE GRUNTS
8
00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:30,960
One, two, three!
9
00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:35,960
Crap.
10
00:00:35,960 --> 00:00:38,000
THEY GROAN
What? I'm cancelling our night off.
11
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:39,960
THEY PROTEST
What?!
12
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:42,960
Sorry, pardon?!
Again, from the top. Faster.
13
00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:44,960
Faster?!
Oh, for fuck's sake.
14
00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:46,960
Cancelling our Friday night off
is going a bit far.
15
00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:48,960
You are lucky
I am strongly anti-union.
16
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:50,960
That was, like, 12-out-of-ten good.
17
00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:55,480
I don't give out shabamalams
for just anything. Ooh! Shabamalam.
18
00:00:55,480 --> 00:00:57,960
And that's even with
Colonel Pathetic here as a stand-in.
19
00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:00,960
Ooh, promoted from captain!
Thank you.
20
00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:03,320
Why isn't that bloody Hurricane diva
training with us anyway?
21
00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:08,960
Well, as I explained, Clifford,
she is also a chef.
22
00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:14,640
And, Mya, as I told you,
she is also a vet.
23
00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:17,640
So... busy, busy.
24
00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:21,640
But she'll be there on the day and
she's much faster, so pick it up.
25
00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:24,160
There were still telegraphed moves,
lazy bumps.
26
00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:26,320
The show is not ready,
for fuck's sake!
27
00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:28,960
Ah, there she goes again
with her famous catchphrase...
28
00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:30,000
ALL: Oh, for fuck's sake!
29
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:31,960
IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE:
For fuck's sake!
30
00:01:31,960 --> 00:01:33,960
This is Slamageddon.
31
00:01:33,960 --> 00:01:36,960
We need to look twice as good
as Nick's goons!
32
00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:39,960
MYA: We do! Hols, the Nitro lot,
33
00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:41,960
they're not just living rent-free
in your head.
34
00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:44,960
They're Airbnb-ing it,
and making a profit.
35
00:01:44,960 --> 00:01:45,960
For fuck...
ALL: Hey!
36
00:01:45,960 --> 00:01:48,960
I didn't say it. She just said it.
Yeah. Definitely did. Definitely.
37
00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:51,960
I... need to go and see my mum.
38
00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:53,960
Uh, I'll be back in 45.
39
00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:55,960
Run the whole show
from the top, OK?
40
00:01:55,960 --> 00:01:57,960
Yep.
Yeah. Fine. No problem at all.
41
00:01:57,960 --> 00:01:58,960
Absolutely no problem.
42
00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:02,960
So, we all having that night off,
then? Oh, yeah. Yeah.
43
00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:04,800
Oh, yeah. I think we are.
44
00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:13,960
ALL: # Happy birthday, Nick Nitro...
Nitro!
45
00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:15,000
# Me!
46
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:20,000
# Happy birthday to you
To me! #
47
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,160
Yes! Quality!
48
00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:24,960
Ha-ha! Right.
Go on, then. Blow 'em out.
49
00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:27,000
That's my boy.
My boy, isn't he gorgeous?
50
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:28,960
Whoo!
Isn't he gorgeous?
51
00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:30,960
What a son, eh?
Oh, for fuck's sake.
52
00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:34,960
In my day, if you wanted to instil
a bit of discipline in someone,
53
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:36,960
you'd piss in their boots. Easy.
54
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:40,160
No-one's gonna piss
in anyone's boots, Clifford.
55
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,960
Just like we're not bringing back
your weird old-style matches
56
00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:44,960
with rules no-one understands.
57
00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:46,800
Well, they couldn't be simpler.
58
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:48,640
Whoever sings
the national anthem loudest
59
00:02:48,640 --> 00:02:50,960
begins with what's called
Grimble's Advantage. Now...
60
00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:54,960
Right, I'm going for a Balti.
What are youse doing tonight, lads?
61
00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:58,960
Uh, not a lad.
It's actually a big LARPing night.
62
00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:01,960
We're building an effigy
of the Norse dragon Lord Fafnir
63
00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:03,960
in order to absorb his powers.
64
00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:06,960
We each contributed an element
to his mighty frame.
65
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:11,960
DRAGON ROARS,
DRAMATIC MUSIC
66
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:14,960
Oh, dear.
MYA: No, Cliff.
67
00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:18,960
Your ideas are either old and dull
or scary and weird.
68
00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:20,960
There's nothing weird
about slicing up my forehead
69
00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:22,480
with a razor blade mid-match.
70
00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:24,160
Adds a bit of colour,
and the kids love it.
71
00:03:24,160 --> 00:03:26,480
What about you, Jack?
Oh, it's Jack's big date.
72
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,960
First one since the divorce.
73
00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:30,800
OK, not technically a divorce. Um...
74
00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:32,640
Hey, you should use me chat up line.
75
00:03:32,640 --> 00:03:35,000
Wanna play birthmark or rash?
76
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:36,960
Or ask them if they like food.
77
00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:38,960
Or just whap it out.
78
00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:39,960
Uh, no. No, thank you.
79
00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:41,960
I-I-I don't wanna feel
everyone over my shoulder.
80
00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:45,960
I thought mostly I'd just try to say
as little as possible,
81
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:48,960
but to make things spicy...
82
00:03:49,960 --> 00:03:51,960
..this spicy bottle of red.
83
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:56,000
96 out of 100 in Wine Spectator,
but only 5.99 in Aldi.
84
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,160
Wow.
85
00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:02,960
You are part of the snowflakiest
generation on record.
86
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:04,960
And you know what
the snowflakes killed? Dinosaurs.
87
00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:07,640
Men of my standing,
we were hell-raisers.
88
00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:10,640
One tour, I drank solidly
from Sun up to Sun down,
89
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:11,960
and do you know why
that was impressive?
90
00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:12,960
It was in Iceland.
91
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:16,480
Eight weeks, that was,
and I didn't miss a show.
92
00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:19,960
You do realise
nowadays it's cool to not drink?
93
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,960
Pfft.
But if we went shot for shot,
94
00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:25,960
your wrinkly arse
would be unconscious.
95
00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:28,000
Sounds like a drinking contest
to me.
96
00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:35,320
Care to formalise it in blood
with my lucky razor blade?
97
00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:37,960
There's no-one more screwed up
than a pro-wrestler
98
00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:40,960
who went to boarding school.
Mm-hm?
99
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:42,960
Thanks for the gin fusion, Saima.
100
00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:47,320
Oh, and, uh,
if Mrs Tothill sadly passes,
101
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:48,960
could you do us a Tramadol?
102
00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:50,960
Oh, and her handbag.
Uh, yeah.
103
00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:53,960
Right, mustn't keep you.
104
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:55,960
Got a bit of a busy night.
105
00:04:55,960 --> 00:04:57,960
Busy? You're in hospital.
106
00:04:57,960 --> 00:04:59,640
Stelios, the night porter,
107
00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:04,960
is dropping by later
to, uh, plump me pillows. Big hands.
108
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:05,960
Cheers, Mum. Do the rest of
109
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:08,000
my presents later, yeah?
Yeah.
110
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:11,800
You know, you haven't been to visit
Mum once in a month.
111
00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:13,960
Oh, Holly, don't. He's got lots on.
112
00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:17,960
Yeah. See, running a successful
company actually keeps you busy.
113
00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:20,960
Yeah, you're doing very well,
aren't you, love?
114
00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:22,960
You know it's my birthday tomorrow?
115
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:26,960
Day after Nick's,
like... every year?
116
00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:28,960
Course.
117
00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:34,960
That's why I've got you,
erm, erm... this.
118
00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:39,960
Yeah.
Chewing gum?
119
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:44,480
Nicotine. It-It-It's from Saudi,
so it's dead strong.
120
00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:46,960
So, you doing anything nice
with your evening?
121
00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:49,960
Well, I...
Yeah, we've got a show.
122
00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:53,960
It's gonna be massive...
like my dick.
123
00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:57,960
GAGS
Oh, he's like his dad, in that way.
124
00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:00,640
Your old man was like
two cans of Tenants.
125
00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:02,960
What is wrong with the pair of you?
126
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:09,960
What?!
I-I might have... Oh, bloody hell.
127
00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:13,960
Shot for shot until someone gives,
and to keep things interesting,
128
00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:16,960
we'll play bragging rights
with pints downed in one.
129
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:18,960
SCOFFS
I hate beer.
130
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:20,960
Good thing I won't be drinking any.
131
00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:23,960
Mm, big talk from a little...
Round one.
132
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:24,960
HOLLY: I'm back!
133
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:26,960
How are you all getting on?
DOOR CLOSES
134
00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:29,800
Guys, my night cannot get any...
135
00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:35,960
Oh, come on!
MANGO IN DISTANCE: Hello?! Hello?!
136
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:37,960
Ah! Hey, Holly!
137
00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:41,480
Mango. Come to preview
some Boss Pro action?
138
00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:43,960
Ah, no. Uh, sorry.
139
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,960
I'm heading over to Nick Nitro's
show, actually, out of respect.
140
00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:49,000
Um, I came to see if
anyone was heading over that way.
141
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:54,960
Yeah, but they're all busy.
Busy?
142
00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:57,960
Uh, Bertha went LARPing,
Mya and Clifford are drinking,
143
00:06:57,960 --> 00:06:59,960
Woodhouse is working,
and Ben's gone for his tea.
144
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:03,320
It was all in GWONK's daily update,
"Grappling With Gossip".
145
00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:05,960
Who cares what the boss wants, eh?
146
00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:07,960
The Hurricane
was mysteriously absent.
147
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,960
Oh, and Jack has a date.
148
00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:11,960
Jack has a date?
149
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:14,960
I actually stumbled on his profile,
after forensically searching for it.
150
00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:17,480
"Dislikes -
a haphazard and tardy approach
151
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,960
"to email system and filing."
152
00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:23,480
I totally agree.
Personally, I'm inbox zero,
153
00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:26,960
but at the very least,
have an out of office.
154
00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:30,160
"Height, 5'11''...
and three fifths."
155
00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:32,960
And you're exactly the same height
as in your bio.
156
00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:34,960
"Likes - democracy."
157
00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:36,960
So, who do you vote for?
158
00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:40,960
"Seeks... true love."
159
00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:45,320
Well, I mean,
who'd wanna go out with that?
160
00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:46,960
Can I bring you some menus?
161
00:07:46,960 --> 00:07:49,640
BOTH: Actually,
I already checked online.
162
00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:52,960
I'll give you a moment.
163
00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:56,960
Well, this is very nice.
Very, very nice.
164
00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:02,960
Ben?
All right, Jack?
165
00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:05,960
Don't mind me, pal.
I'm not even here.
166
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:08,960
You done with them chutneys?
167
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:13,960
Down that pint
if you haven't crashed a wedding.
168
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,960
Got off
with the mother of the bride.
169
00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:19,960
Conducted the ceremony
and got booked for three more.
170
00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:23,960
Jack?!
171
00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:29,960
You're popular.
That's quite extraordinarily-untrue.
172
00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:30,960
How are you, Mya?
173
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:32,960
Are you done with them poppadoms?
Yeah.
174
00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:35,960
Cliff.
175
00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:37,960
Which is how I came to own
176
00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,960
three of Lewis Capaldi's
empty beer cans.
177
00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:43,960
PHONE CHIMES
Ah, new poster art.
178
00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:45,960
I bought
a spare Nitro wrestling ticket
179
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:49,320
for a GWONK-etition winner...
and no-one entered.
180
00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:54,960
Would you like it?
CHUCKLES
181
00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,640
The only reason I'd go
is to ruin his...
182
00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:02,960
Yes. Uh, yes,
I will take the ticket. Thanks.
183
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,480
I'm sorry.
They're just unnerving me.
184
00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:08,960
I understand that,
but they're not my friends,
185
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,320
they're not unnerving me unduly.
186
00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:15,960
Now... Ah-ha!
..I brought us a little something.
187
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:21,960
It's scored 96 out of 100
in Wine Spectator, but was only...
188
00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:23,960
BOTH: ..5.99 in Aldi!
189
00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:30,800
For once, I'm gonna fuck
one of Nick's birthdays up.
190
00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:35,960
CLATTERING
It's actually... quite dark.
191
00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:42,960
Why would you ask that question
if you knew you hadn't done it?
192
00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:43,960
I thought I had done it.
193
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:47,960
And if you hadn't fact-checked it
online... Nah, busted!
194
00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:49,960
Riding to the ring
on a stolen milk float
195
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:53,960
was "The Whistling Werewolf"
Johnny Rollerblades.
196
00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:56,960
God, that was a confusing gimmick.
Um...
197
00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:59,800
CLEARS THROAT
..by the way, have you ever...
198
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:03,960
Have you ever spoken
to that Masked Hurricane?
199
00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:05,960
How are youse? How do you reckon
Jack's date is gonna go?
200
00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:07,960
Here's exactly what I reckon.
201
00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:11,960
Whilst Cliff was on the loo -
against the rules by the way -
202
00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:14,960
I started a book with odds
for the night.
203
00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:19,480
"20 to one, gets a boner and cries."
That's bang out of order.
204
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:22,960
Stick a fiver on that, and 30 quid
says they're done within the hour.
205
00:10:23,960 --> 00:10:24,960
Legend.
206
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:26,960
OK, Jack, you just need to breathe.
207
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:30,960
Like this bottle
of reasonably-priced spicy red wine.
208
00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:34,960
Jack? Ooh!
Bertha. What is this?
209
00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:39,960
Oh, um, the upstairs function room
is transforming into Fafnir's Lair
210
00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:43,960
via the magic of LARPing,
and, um, a lava lamp.
211
00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:48,960
Fafnir's Lair?
You look extraordinary.
212
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:53,960
Aw! Check this out.
CLEARS THROAT
213
00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:58,960
I bless you both with my flaps.
Unexpected.
214
00:11:03,640 --> 00:11:06,960
The, um, chains are attached
to my actual nipples.
215
00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:20,960
WOMAN: Aww, thanks, Nick!
216
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,960
Paid for a ticket to see
some proper wrestling, did you?
217
00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:26,960
No, but I did! Happy birthday, Nick.
218
00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:29,960
I made you this card.
OK. Thanks, Mary.
219
00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:32,960
It's Mango. You're so welcome.
OK.
220
00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:36,960
Sold out crowd chanting my name.
221
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:39,480
Gonna be the best birthday ever.
222
00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:41,960
Oh, wait! Whoa!
Hang on, hang on, hang on!
223
00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:43,800
No hats or headgear.
224
00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:47,640
I'm not... Wait, you're joking.
225
00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:49,960
Just following the rules, Hols.
226
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,960
So, if you want to see the show,
then, uh...
227
00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:54,960
CLICKS TONGUE
..gonna have to take 'em off.
228
00:11:54,960 --> 00:11:56,960
Fine.
229
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:59,960
Oh, my God! She's actually done it!
LAUGHS
230
00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:04,960
As if her fake ears are a hat. Wow!
Reject!
231
00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:09,960
Change of plan.
I'm not gonna ruin the show.
232
00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:11,800
I'm gonna stop it fucking happening.
233
00:12:13,960 --> 00:12:17,320
Can I stick a tenner
on panic attack...
234
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:18,960
with an ambulance call?
235
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:19,960
Yes!
Yes.
236
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:20,960
BREATHES UNEVENLY
237
00:12:20,960 --> 00:12:23,960
Four people I work with back-to-back
showing up here, I just...
238
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:27,960
Jack, you've apologised on average
once every 45 seconds.
239
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:30,160
At least
the night can't get any stranger.
240
00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:32,960
Welcome to Hot, Hot, Hot Tandoori.
241
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:37,960
My name is... Rishi. Ah! Hi, Jack.
242
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:41,960
Due to my journalistic integrity,
243
00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:43,960
I can't be
part of these shenanigans.
244
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:47,960
Plus, Nick and I have
a real connection.
245
00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:51,960
Do you know who should be here
for this? My team.
246
00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:54,960
SHE SIGHS
247
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,960
But they don't wanna hang out
with me,
248
00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:01,960
even though they're
a bunch of anti-social weirdos.
249
00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,000
You know why?
250
00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:08,960
Cos you call them
a bunch of anti-social weirdos?
251
00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:11,960
Not that I'd ever do this,
252
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:15,320
but have you considered
sneaking through the front door,
253
00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:17,960
wearing this hi-vis jacket,
holding this clipboard,
254
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:19,960
and saying
you're with St John's ambulance?
255
00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:24,960
WHISPERS: Lewis Capaldi's
dressing room smells of figs.
256
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:32,960
As we're all here,
except for Jill,
257
00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:34,960
who's apparently driving
a mobility scooter
258
00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:36,480
wrong way up the M1,
259
00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:38,960
it's my birthday,
I booked a stripper.
260
00:13:38,960 --> 00:13:44,960
So, a fiver in, tenner
if you wanna watch, yeah? Quality.
261
00:13:44,960 --> 00:13:46,960
# Partying, clubbing
Wrestling, shisha
262
00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:48,480
# Get yourself to Bubblez
Better than 'Biza
263
00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:49,960
# Partying, clubbing
Wrestling, shisha
264
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:51,960
# Get down to Bubblez
Better than 'Biza
265
00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,960
# What, what?
Yeah
266
00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:55,960
# What's my name?
Nick Nitro
267
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,480
# Say it louder... #
268
00:13:58,960 --> 00:14:00,160
How are you working here?
269
00:14:00,160 --> 00:14:02,960
Ah, check it. I'm a jobbie.
270
00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:04,960
Legally, the wage I accepted,
271
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:06,960
I'm on an ultra-short-term
apprenticeship.
272
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:08,960
Rishi is also a friend?
273
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:10,960
And he's also called Woodhouse.
274
00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:15,800
And a friend of Jack's is
a friend of Rishi and Woodhouse's.
275
00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:18,800
30% off until Sunday third.
276
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:21,640
Oh, yeah! I picked one of those up
in training.
277
00:14:21,640 --> 00:14:23,960
Yeah, got a bloody stack of 'em.
278
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:26,960
Do I get paid to distribute
the flyers? No.
279
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:28,960
Is it a requirement? You betcha.
280
00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:32,960
All your friends have flyers.
Jack, it's strange that you don't.
281
00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:39,960
I didn't want you to think
I was too thrifty.
282
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:42,960
There's no such thing
as too thrifty.
283
00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:48,960
Oh, I'm getting paid two thrifty
per hour, minus commish.
284
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:54,960
GRUNTS ANGRILY
285
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,640
CONTINUES GRUNTING
286
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,480
# Rest and shisha
Get down to Bubbles
287
00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:08,960
# Better than Ibiza... #
288
00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:19,960
ALL CHANT QUIETLY: Fafnir. Fafnir.
289
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:25,960
Fafnir. Fafnir.
290
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:31,960
OK, Jack, thanks for all this,
but I've matched with someone else
291
00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:33,960
and I'm meeting them
292
00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:35,800
for a drink now.
Oh.
293
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:40,320
Joking! This isn't even close
to the worst date I've been on.
294
00:15:40,320 --> 00:15:42,960
Do you have any idea
how bad men are?
295
00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:45,960
We are... statistically bad.
296
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:47,320
MYA: Rock, paper, scissors!
297
00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:52,160
Now, I'd like to read you an excerpt
from my unpublished novel.
298
00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:56,960
Oh.
I'm... I'm joking too!
299
00:15:56,960 --> 00:16:01,160
THEY LAUGH
Huh, huh, huh! Argh!
300
00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:05,960
I haven't tried the lamb bhuna.
301
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:11,960
Round 12.5?
Mm.
302
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:13,960
You know what I think, Cliffy boy?
Mm.
303
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:15,960
We're not that different.
Mm.
304
00:16:15,960 --> 00:16:19,960
Both hustlers.
Both don't know how to back down.
305
00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:25,960
But... I bet we both haven't
borrowed an animal from a zoo.
306
00:16:25,960 --> 00:16:28,640
Penguin - dare on a school trip.
307
00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:31,960
Pair of anteaters - long story.
308
00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:35,960
THEY LAUGH
309
00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:39,960
Oh! Ah!
It's like Holly, you know?
310
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:42,320
Girl does not know how to quit.
311
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:45,960
Pam says, "You don't wrestle,"
312
00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:51,000
but between us, Bertha told me
Holly's the Masked Hurricane.
313
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,960
What a legend!
314
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:57,480
MAN: Oi!
315
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:02,960
MANGO: Hey, Holly!
Doors have opened.
316
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:04,960
Oh, and the proper ring's
in the big room.
317
00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:06,960
They have two rings?
318
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:25,480
Pamela, about Holly,
I've got something to tell you.
319
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:34,960
Well, I'd rate tonight's final hour
a solid 8.3 out of ten.
320
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:38,960
I have 8.6, but then
you've not had my advantage.
321
00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:42,960
Advantage?
Being able to look into your eyes.
322
00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:48,960
Well, after
900 calories of carbohydrates,
323
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:50,960
let's push the boat out
even further.
324
00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:51,960
Think I know what it's time for.
325
00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:54,960
ALL CHANT QUIETLY: Fafnir...
326
00:17:54,960 --> 00:17:58,640
I provide Fafnir's skull.
327
00:17:58,640 --> 00:18:01,160
I provideth Fafnir's tail.
328
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:03,960
I provideth Fafnir's...
329
00:18:05,160 --> 00:18:07,960
Reasonably-priced bottle of Malbec?
330
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:09,960
Hope you've got room for this.
331
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:12,960
HE GASPS,
SHE GASPS
332
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:14,960
HE WHISPERS:
I don't know what that is.
333
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:19,960
Oh, Jack,
I thought this date was going well,
334
00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:21,960
but now it's perfect.
335
00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:24,480
I know, I'm so sor... Pardon?
336
00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:27,960
It'd like you've been reading
my incognito browsing tabs.
337
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,640
Thank you for introducing this
to me.
338
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:34,960
Well, no. It-It's not for you.
339
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:40,320
Oh, even better.
I've never pegged a man.
340
00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:44,960
But I yearn to peg.
341
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:47,320
I-I don't yearn. I-I-I yearn not!
342
00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:49,960
My God!
Yes!
343
00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:03,960
You send very mixed signals, Jack.
344
00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:05,960
I'd say you should put that
in your profile,
345
00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:07,960
but you'd only write it
in a misleading way.
346
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:14,960
Let's not make this
a totally wasted evening.
347
00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:16,960
Ooh!
348
00:19:17,960 --> 00:19:21,960
Oi, Jack! That cost me 250 quid.
349
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,000
Go and fucking get it.
350
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,000
NICK LAUGHS
NICK: Heard they kicked
351
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,960
a sad little loser out the club.
352
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:28,960
If it isn't the reject!
353
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:29,960
Show went brilliant, by the way.
354
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:33,960
Everyone loved the voddy
sour apple smell in the photo ring.
355
00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:36,960
HE SNIFFS
Class.
356
00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:38,960
Oh, come on, Hols. Give us a laugh.
357
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:41,960
Sign me something funny, eh?
It's my birthday.
358
00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:45,480
Actually, it's Holly's birthday
after midnight, which is...
359
00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:54,960
..now.
Jesus. Just look at 'em.
360
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:56,960
It's like a walking charity shop,
innit?
361
00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:59,000
And you should be ashamed
of yourself, Nicholas Nitrogen.
362
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:03,960
Pfft! Ashamed? Well, you're
the twats being led by this reject.
363
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:06,960
If Holly's a reject, then so am I.
364
00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:08,960
Literally -
just got rejected, actually.
365
00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:11,960
Yeah, proud to be a reject, mate.
You know what? Me too.
366
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:15,960
Reject Rishi reporting for duty.
367
00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:17,960
Me and Cliff are rejects too.
I don't think I...
368
00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,960
Shut up, is what we're saying.
Yep.
369
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,960
Well, there you go, Nick.
370
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:25,960
Rejects assembled. Now what?
371
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:30,960
SCOFFS
Whatever.
372
00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:34,960
Come on. Let's go back to the club.
373
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:39,960
I'm gonna buy drinks
for fit uni students all night long,
374
00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:42,320
so fuck youse all later!
375
00:20:43,960 --> 00:20:45,960
Wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait. Not my sister.
376
00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,160
Wait, or you two.
377
00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:51,960
Wait, or the blokes, obviously.
Nitro... out!
378
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:58,960
Look at this fucking shit here.
379
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:01,960
SHE LAUGHS
380
00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:08,960
# Happy birthday, dear Holly... #
381
00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:09,960
Ah!
382
00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:15,960
# Happy birthday to you! #
383
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:19,640
THEY CHEER
384
00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:23,960
THEY CHANT: Boss! Boss! Boss! Boss!
Boss! Boss! Boss!
385
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:26,960
Come on!
CHANTING CONTINUES
386
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:30,960
Hey!
387
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,960
Boss! Boss! Boss! Boss!
CHANTING CONTINUES
388
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,960
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