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TRACEY: # What'll I do
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00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:05,960
# When you
3
00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:09,960
# Are far away
4
00:00:09,960 --> 00:00:12,960
# And I am blue?
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00:00:12,960 --> 00:00:15,960
# What'll I do?
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00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:19,960
SHARON: # When I'm alone
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00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:21,960
# With only
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# Dreams of you
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# That won't come true
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00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:32,960
BOTH: What'll I do?
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(LAUGHTER) TRACEY: Leave it.
GARTH: Keep your eyes shut.
SHARON: All right.
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00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:43,800
Don't throw me under a bus. Oh,
hang on! Watch your step. Up you go.
13
00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:46,480
I got it. (LAUGHS)
No peeking till I say, right?
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00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,960
Say hello...to Stubbies.
15
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:50,960
Woodford's next dining sensation!
16
00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:52,960
Da-daa!
17
00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:58,960
Y-Yeah! You think
it's a bit, don't you?
18
00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:00,960
No...
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Obviously, once you look....
20
00:01:02,960 --> 00:01:05,480
past the mouse droppings and the...
21
00:01:06,640 --> 00:01:08,800
..smell of blocked drains and...
22
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..the leaky roof and...
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00:01:11,960 --> 00:01:15,160
the, er, obvious
structural problems. Sharon!
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You see the potential.
25
00:01:17,960 --> 00:01:19,960
Am I too late for the unveiling?
26
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Oh, my God. (SNIFFS)
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00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:27,960
Eurgh! Is there a blocked drain
or are you wearing a new fragrance?
28
00:01:27,960 --> 00:01:30,960
Have you been up
the old peoples home again?
29
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:35,000
Because there's a definite whiff
of OAP about you.
30
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Tudor Lawns is not
an old peoples home.
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It is a luxury retirement facility
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for the comfortable elderly.
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You been reserving a room?
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Is your visa in order?
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If you must know, Sharon,
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00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:54,320
I was visiting the elderly
relative of a friend.
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00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:57,960
Stanley was returning from
a colonic irrigation session.
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We got chatting -
And you found out he was loaded,
39
00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:03,960
so you thought you'd
clean him out in your own way.
40
00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:07,960
I've tried getting by
with my World of Quid salary,
but it doesn't work for me.
41
00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:09,960
I need money. Lots of it.
42
00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:11,960
And if I can't earn it,
I will marry it.
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00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:16,320
Well, I've had a good
look round and, er...
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00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:17,960
Oh, I like your hair.
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Just had my roots done.
Oi, Bob the Builder!
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Step away from the sister.
This is Robin.
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00:02:23,960 --> 00:02:26,960
My boss at the
heating and plumbing company.
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00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:28,960
Oh. Carry on, Robin.
49
00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:30,960
Well, as I said,
I've had a good look round
50
00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:34,960
and this is a breakdown
of what a refurb's gonna cost you.
Cheers, mate.
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00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:44,000
How much longer?
I'll be late for my spray tan.
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00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:45,960
Who's that little madam?
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That's my daughter.
Er, two minutes, Rosie.
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00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:53,960
How many feet can you get into
that big gob of yours?
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I know you from somewhere.
56
00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:06,640
I-I sat next to you in geography
for the whole of year eight. Really?
57
00:03:06,640 --> 00:03:08,960
I was a real bitch back then.
58
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:11,960
You've changed.
59
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:13,960
Who's this? Oh, my name's Poppy.
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So...cute.
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00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:20,960
(SNIGGERS) Yeah, she is, isn't she?
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Oh, I wasn't talking about her.
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00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:29,960
Look, I can't give you
any more off the radiators.
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00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:32,960
But I can give you
another 20% off labour
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00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:34,960
if Tracey will agree
66
00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:36,960
to come out for a drink with me.
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00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:41,320
Oh, sorry. (CLEARS THROAT)
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00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:42,960
Forget I said that.
69
00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:47,640
I'm sorry, I wanted to
ask you out at the Christmas party
but I lost my bottle.
70
00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:51,960
I've been kicking myself ever since.
It all just came tumbling out.
I'm sorry.
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00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:53,960
Look, I'll knock off the 20% anyway.
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00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,960
I'd love to go out
for a drink with you.
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00:03:57,960 --> 00:04:00,480
Well, that's...brilliant!
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00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:02,640
Well... Well, I'll give you a ring.
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(LAUGHS) That's great.
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00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:11,960
What?
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I'm entitled to some fun and all.
78
00:04:13,640 --> 00:04:16,960
Still, money off
for services rendered...
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00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:18,960
You know what that is?
80
00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:22,960
The only opportunity
you'll ever have of earning
more than the minimum wage.
81
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:32,960
Ahem!
82
00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:34,960
Ooo! Look at you!
83
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:37,960
I hardly recognise you, Tracey.
84
00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:39,960
You actually look fabulous.
85
00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:43,960
What does this make?
Four dates in 10 days?
86
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:45,960
He reminds me a bit of Darryl.
87
00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:47,960
Does he keep nipping out
to rob a bank?
88
00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:50,960
He makes me feel safe.
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00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:52,960
When he puts his arms around me,
90
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:54,800
I get this funny feeling
in my tummy.
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00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:56,640
Yeah, nothing like
the frisson of a date.
92
00:04:56,640 --> 00:04:58,320
That promise of the unknown.
93
00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:00,960
There's nothing unknown
about your dates.
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00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:03,960
They all end up exactly the same.
95
00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:06,960
One foot through the car window
and one through the sunroof.
96
00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:09,000
Well, not with Stanley.
97
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:14,960
The only flashing going
on there is the warning light
on his heart monitor.
98
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,960
How old is he exactly?
99
00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:19,960
He's a nonagenarian.
100
00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:21,960
That's older than Bruce Forsyth!
101
00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:26,960
How could you?
Stanley has no relatives.
102
00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:29,960
I'm the only visitor he's had
in years. I light up his life!
103
00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:34,960
No need for his defibrillator
when I'm around.
104
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,960
You don't snog him, do you?
105
00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:39,960
Your tongue don't get stuck
under his plate
106
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:43,960
when you have a little snog?
Sharon! Sharon! Stop it! Stop it.
107
00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:46,960
We just talk.
108
00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:49,960
We chat about soup.
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00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:54,960
He loves soup.
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00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:57,960
(HORN BEEPS) Oh, that's Robin.
Yeah, and I better get a move on.
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00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:01,640
Stanley's not up to much after 9:30
once the medication kicks in.
112
00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,960
Good luck, Tracey. Cheers, Dor.
113
00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:06,320
You gonna be all right? I'll be fine.
114
00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:08,960
I've got four bottles
of cider, a curry,
115
00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:11,000
Saw 1 and 2,
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00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:14,480
and Halloween Slashers: The Return.
117
00:06:14,480 --> 00:06:15,960
What more could a girl want?
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00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:18,960
Enjoy yourself. See you later.
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00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:20,960
Well, apart from Daniel Craig
in a mankini.
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00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:25,960
(WIND WHISTLES)
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(TENSE MUSIC)
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(SCREAMING) (SCREAMS)
123
00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:38,960
(BANGING)
124
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:01,960
(WINDOW BANGS)
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00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,960
(SIGHS)
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00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:10,320
(GASPS) I'm warning you, mate!
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I-I've got a vicious
old dog in here.
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00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:14,960
Stay, Dorian! Stay!
129
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:19,160
Sharon?
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00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:22,960
Sharon!
131
00:07:22,960 --> 00:07:24,960
Lenny? Blimey.
132
00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:27,960
Here, what you doing here?
133
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:29,960
I think I should be asking you that.
134
00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:35,960
(DOOR OPENS)
DORIAN: Hello, Stanley dear.
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00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:37,960
How are you this evening? (GIGGLES)
136
00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:42,960
(SIGHS)
137
00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:44,960
Have you heard?
138
00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:49,960
They're calling us
the Catherine Zeta Jones and
Michael Douglas of the Day Room.
139
00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:52,960
Are you up to having
a little read from my book?
140
00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:55,960
Very well.
141
00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,960
Now, where were we? Oh...
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00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,960
Page 73, I think.
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00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:04,160
(GIGGLES)
144
00:08:04,160 --> 00:08:06,960
"Lotti laid on the bed.
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00:08:06,960 --> 00:08:09,640
Her body quivered
as he moved slowly towards her.
146
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:14,960
She could smell
the testosterone in the air
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00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:16,960
as he reached forward,
148
00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:18,640
grabbed her flimsy blouse,
149
00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,960
allowing him...to expose her!"
150
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:22,960
(WHEEZES) Oh!
151
00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,960
Yes, I think we
better stop there, Stanley.
152
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:32,960
We don't want to push our luck.
153
00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:38,960
Well, what shall we do next?
154
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(WHISPERS)
155
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(GASPS) Stanley!
156
00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:46,960
I couldn't possibly do that!
157
00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:49,960
What if someone were to come in?
158
00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:53,960
Oh, very well.
159
00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:55,960
You know I can never say no to you.
160
00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:14,960
I'd have never give this place a
spin if I'd have known it was yours.
161
00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:16,960
Oh, it's not mine actually.
162
00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:19,960
It's Tracey's. Tracey?
163
00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:21,960
(LAUGHS) God!
164
00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:25,960
Here, do you remember
when we used to go out as a foursome
with her and Darryl down in...
165
00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:28,960
BOTH: The Tottenham Royal!
That's right. (LAUGHS)
166
00:09:28,960 --> 00:09:32,800
I used to keep a look out while
you did the fag machines. (SIGHS)
167
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:34,960
Happy days. Oh, yeah.
168
00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:36,960
They were good times.
169
00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:42,960
It's really good
to see you again, Shal.
170
00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:44,960
You too, Lenny.
171
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:47,640
Do you fancy a cider?
172
00:09:47,640 --> 00:09:50,160
(IN A POSH VOICE) I've got
a couple of bottles chilling.
173
00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:52,960
(IN A POSH VOICE) Oh!
Well, that would be very nice!
174
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,960
(BOTH LAUGH)
175
00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:00,960
Keep your eyes off the knickknacks.
Oh! Sorry.
176
00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:02,960
Force of habit.
177
00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:06,960
Ah, it's lovely.
178
00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:08,960
Thank you.
To be honest, my favourite eatery
179
00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:12,160
is a greasy spoon
off the Great Cambridge Road.
180
00:10:12,160 --> 00:10:14,320
I love a good cafe.
181
00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:16,160
Jan, Rosie's mum...
182
00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:19,000
(SUCKS TEETH) She used to
tell me off for going there.
183
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,800
Thought we were above that.
184
00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:22,960
Then she ran off with the milkman.
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00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:25,000
Filthy animal.
186
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,960
Sorry. Well...
187
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:32,800
Technically, he owned the dairy,
but my version makes her sound
like more of a scrubber. (LAUGHS)
188
00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:35,960
I've really missed her.
189
00:10:36,960 --> 00:10:38,960
Until now.
190
00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:43,960
You've filled
a big, big hole, Tracey.
191
00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:54,480
Which is more than
this dinner's gonna do.
192
00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:55,960
I thought there was potato!
193
00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:58,960
I think that's it there.
Under your radish.
194
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:02,960
You think that cafe
of yours will still be open?
195
00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:05,960
They do a lovely
all-night all-day breakfast.
196
00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:07,160
Sounds good to me.
197
00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:09,960
Won't you feel a bit overdressed?
Oh, don't worry.
198
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:12,320
I'll tell 'em my donkey jacket's
in the wash. (LAUGHS)
199
00:11:12,320 --> 00:11:14,480
Cheers, Jan. I'll sort the bill.
200
00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:17,960
(Jan?)
201
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:22,960
TRACEY: I'm back!
202
00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:28,960
You're home early. Robin's
got a trade fair in the morning.
203
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:30,960
What you been up to? Not a lot.
204
00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:33,960
Hello, Trace!
205
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,800
How are you? Eh?
206
00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:40,960
It's really funny, you know?
You'll never guess what's happened.
207
00:11:40,960 --> 00:11:42,640
Try me. Well...
208
00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:45,960
Lenny bumped into Fat Angela
and she gave him my address
209
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,960
and then he popped round
just on the off chance I'd be in...
210
00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:51,960
and he got lucky. Didn't he just.
211
00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:56,800
Would you mind putting
some trousers on, please?
212
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,960
Oops! (LAUGHS) Where's my manners?
213
00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:04,960
What?!
214
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:06,960
Didn't he used to be a burglar?
215
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,960
Lenny? No!
216
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:12,960
You're thinking of someone else. No,
I'm not. Lenny and the fag machines.
217
00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:16,320
Well, that's me and Marcie
shafted then. What's happened?
218
00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:19,960
The cold room in the kitchen's
gone crook. Oh, speak English.
219
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:22,160
No cold room means
I can't store food, Mum.
220
00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:24,960
If I can't store food,
I can't open the restaurant.
221
00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:26,960
And if I can't open
the restaurant...
222
00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:29,960
I can't pay the bills, Mum. Oh, no.
223
00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:32,960
(SIGHS)
224
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:35,640
We did have one idea
how to raise some cash.
225
00:12:35,640 --> 00:12:37,960
A pop-up. Pop-up?
226
00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:40,960
It's like a restaurant
but it's somewhere different.
227
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:42,960
Like in a lift.
228
00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:46,960
Little bit small.
229
00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:49,960
I was thinking maybe here.
What here, here?!
230
00:12:49,960 --> 00:12:52,480
It's a bit of a liberty, Garthy.
231
00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:55,960
Filling up your mum's house
with people she hardly knows.
232
00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:01,960
Do you mind if I make myself
a cup of tea?
233
00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:03,960
I've worked up a terrible thirst.
234
00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:11,960
That's different.
235
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:15,960
.
236
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:19,960
.
237
00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:22,960
There you go. Lovely. Ta.
238
00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:27,960
The matron at Stanley's
retirement home
239
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,960
has agreed to let me
bring him here for a meal.
240
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:33,160
Now...make sure
we get the corner table.
241
00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:36,000
I don't want anyone
tripping over his oxygen bottle.
242
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:40,960
And champagne! I am pretty sure
that he is planning to propose.
243
00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:44,160
You're not seriously going
through with all this, are you?
244
00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:47,320
Desperate times
call for desperate measures.
245
00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:50,960
I'm starting to forget what the
inside of Harvey Nic's looks like.
246
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:52,960
Right, give us a hand, Dor.
247
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:54,960
Er, I'm actually rather busy.
248
00:13:54,960 --> 00:13:57,960
Where's Tracey?
Why isn't she helping you?
249
00:13:57,960 --> 00:13:59,960
Didn't come home last night.
250
00:13:59,960 --> 00:14:01,960
Really? Mm.
251
00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:03,960
That's a first for Tracey.
252
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:05,960
Even Darryl had to wait
from Easter till Christmas
253
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,960
before he got a glimpse
of Santa's grotto.
254
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:11,000
(DOOR OPENS) Here she is!
255
00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:16,960
Trying to creep in the back door,
eh? You brazen hussy.
256
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,960
Grow up, Sharon.
257
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:20,640
Come on, then, Tracey. Did you?
258
00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:22,960
Did I what? BOTH: Do it?
259
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:24,960
Course I did. (GASPS)
260
00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,960
Yes! Oh-oh!
261
00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:30,960
Well, where did you go?
Was it a seedy budget hotel?
262
00:14:30,960 --> 00:14:33,960
Back seat of a car?
How did he suggest it?
263
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:35,960
He didn't. I did.
264
00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:39,960
Tracey Stubbs! Don't look like that!
265
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:41,960
You both give it away like sweets.
266
00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:45,960
Was he better than Darryl?
It wouldn't be difficult.
267
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,960
Darryl made love
the way he robbed banks.
268
00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:51,960
He went in hard,
fired off a couple of shots
and got out as quick as he could.
269
00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:55,960
(DOOR CLOSES) GARTH: We're back!
270
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:58,960
Don't say anything to the boys
about me being out last night.
271
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:00,960
You already have, haven't you?
272
00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:06,640
All right, Mum?
273
00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:08,800
So have I got a new dad, then?
274
00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:11,800
All right, Mum?
275
00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:14,640
Good night, was it?
276
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:17,960
I'll see you later.
277
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,960
I may have mentioned it.
278
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:26,320
Mum, get your gladrags off.
You've got carrots to scrape.
279
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:28,480
Come on, chop chop.
280
00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:34,640
Right, here you go.
281
00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:36,960
That's, er, crab
with lemon something.
282
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:40,640
And a dollop of
whatsit sauce on the side.
283
00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:42,800
Enjoy.
284
00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:45,960
Can't you try and sound
a bit more professional?
285
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:47,960
It's the taste what's important.
286
00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:49,960
And you had your thumb
in that bloke's soup.
287
00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:52,960
No, I didn't! And it's not soup,
it's prawn consomme.
288
00:15:56,960 --> 00:15:58,960
Hello. What are you doing here?
289
00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:01,960
Well, I just thought I'd come
and see how you were getting on.
290
00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:04,960
We're fully booked.
All our neighbours have
turned to support Garthy.
291
00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:07,960
Really? GARTH: Service!
292
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,960
Look, I'm obviously
in the way here, so...
293
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:12,960
Why don't I come back later when
you're done and I'll take you out?
294
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:15,320
Well, I'll probably be
a bit knackered but, er...
295
00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:17,960
I usually get a second wind
around midnight.
296
00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:19,960
Mm-mm-hm. (LAUGHS)
297
00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:23,960
Don't I know it!
298
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,960
Oh. Oh! (LAUGHS)
299
00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:31,320
(GROANS)
300
00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:36,960
Why are we here?
I thought I'd buy you dinner.
301
00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:38,960
What, are we, like, 35?
302
00:16:40,160 --> 00:16:42,320
I've got a much better idea.
303
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,960
So, are you gonna show me
your room, or what?
304
00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:51,960
It's just that it's a bit messy.
305
00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:53,960
Then we won't turn the light on.
306
00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:55,960
It's just that...
307
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:57,800
there's clothes on the floor and...
308
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,960
You're not a virgin, are you?
309
00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:01,000
(LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
310
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,960
No.
311
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:05,960
TRACEY: Travis! We could do
with your help down here!
312
00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:07,960
Ah, would you believe it?
313
00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:09,960
Next time.
314
00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:17,960
In you come. Er, Tracey.
Tracey, this is Stanley.
315
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:19,960
Welcome to Stubbies Pop-up, Stanley.
316
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:22,160
Hope you didn't have any trouble
with the front step.
317
00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:23,960
Trust me, not a problem for Brendan.
318
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,960
Over here, Brendan.
319
00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:28,000
Over here.
320
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:31,960
I don't think we're gonna fit that
wheelchair in the downstairs loo.
321
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:33,960
Not a problem. He, erm...
322
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:35,960
He wears his own facilities.
323
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,960
Now, listen...
324
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,960
as soon as he pops the question,
325
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,960
I will order the champagne.
326
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:44,960
But make sure you take
the cork out in the kitchen.
327
00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:46,960
Any sudden bangs
could finish him off.
328
00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:53,960
You still up
for going out tonight?
329
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:55,640
Not half.
330
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,000
I, er...
331
00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:58,960
I got you a little something.
332
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:01,960
Oh, Lenny.
333
00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:03,960
It's lovely. Trace!
334
00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:05,960
Look at what Lenny just give me. Ah.
335
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:10,960
It looks just like the one that
Debbie at 35 got for Christmas.
336
00:18:10,960 --> 00:18:12,960
In fact, it's exactly like it.
337
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:16,640
It's even got her initials
engraved on the back.
338
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:18,960
I told you.
I warned you what he was like.
339
00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:20,960
An old dog never changes his pants.
340
00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:28,960
(LAUGHS) Excuse moi.
341
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:33,960
Have you turned over
one of our neighbours?
342
00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:35,960
No!
343
00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:38,960
Have you turned over
all of our neighbours?
344
00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:40,960
Yes.
345
00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:43,960
He's what? All right, all right,
no need to get feisty.
346
00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:46,960
Just calm down. It'll be fine.
Just keep 'em all here.
347
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:49,960
Give 'em free coffee,
brandy, whatever it takes,
348
00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:51,960
while he puts all the stuff back.
349
00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:54,960
What sort of self-respecting burglar
does a thing like that?
350
00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:57,960
The sort that will be
flambeed, filleted,
351
00:18:57,960 --> 00:19:02,960
diced, sliced and served up
to the old Bill if he don't!
352
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:04,960
All right!
353
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,160
Oh! We still on for Tuesday?
354
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:18,800
Is there anything particular you
wanted to say to me this evening?
355
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:20,160
What was that?
356
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,320
No, you can't have any more soup!
357
00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:26,960
You know how I feel about you.
358
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:28,960
You're like a fine wine.
359
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:30,960
Aged to perfection.
360
00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,000
Ready to have its cork popped.
361
00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:44,960
Stanley Barrington Court III...
362
00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:47,960
will you do me the honour
363
00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:49,960
of taking my hand in marriage?
364
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:57,320
You can't possibly be engaged!
365
00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:59,480
Who to?!
366
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,960
(MOANS)
367
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:16,960
You haven't changed,
have you, Sharon?
368
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:20,480
Can't believe you went out
with yet another criminal. (SIGHS)
369
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:24,960
And I can't believe
that you went out with someone
who's older than God.
370
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,960
Devious, conniving,
wizened old husk of a man.
371
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:29,960
Using me to make Brendan jealous.
372
00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:34,960
Don't you reckon the boy done good?
Oh, you done brilliantly. Well done.
373
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:37,800
Yeah, well done, Garthy.
Well done, both of you.
374
00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:41,000
A couple more nights like that and
we'll have all the cash we need.
A couple more?!
375
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,160
God, pour us a pino.
376
00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,960
Where's Rosie? Gone.
377
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,960
She dumped me. (SIGHS)
378
00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:53,960
That's a shame.
We wanted different things.
379
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:59,960
Seems like we've all had our
romantic dreams dashed tonight.
380
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:02,960
Not all of us.
Me and Robin are still going strong.
381
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:05,960
Try to sound
a bit less smug, Tracey.
382
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,960
Rosie says he really,
really likes you.
383
00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:11,800
Apparently, you look
exactly like her mum.
384
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:16,320
(SIGHS) Oh, my God.
385
00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:18,640
She's the spitting image
of you, Trace.
386
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:19,960
Oh, it's creepy.
387
00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:23,960
You can't go out with a man who only
sees you as a clone of his ex-wife.
388
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:25,960
Have you seen that scarf
she's wearing?
389
00:21:25,960 --> 00:21:27,960
It's exactly the same
as the one he bought me.
390
00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:32,480
He's trying to turn me into
one of them Deptford wives.
391
00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:35,480
It's Stepford. Bloody men.
392
00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:37,960
It's the last time I take
my clothes off for any of 'em.
393
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:39,960
Me and all!
394
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:45,960
Won't make promises I can't keep.
395
00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:48,960
(LAUGHTER)
396
00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:50,960
ALL: Cheers.
397
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:52,960
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398
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:18,960
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