All language subtitles for Tyler Perrys House of Payne - S10E07 - In The Hot Seat WEBDL-1080p_track3_[eng]

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,724 --> 00:00:09,827 - ♪ 2 00:00:09,931 --> 00:00:11,275 - Hey, everybody. - Hey, baby. 3 00:00:11,379 --> 00:00:13,275 - Hey! 4 00:00:13,379 --> 00:00:17,241 Ooh, and I made homemade samosas and tandoori chicken. 5 00:00:17,344 --> 00:00:20,931 - [Curtis coughing] 6 00:00:21,034 --> 00:00:24,413 - CALVIN: Oh, yeah, best dinner ever, babe. 7 00:00:27,310 --> 00:00:29,689 Followed by the best lunch ever, Mom. 8 00:00:29,793 --> 00:00:33,310 - Oh, thank you, babe. 9 00:00:33,413 --> 00:00:35,758 - Baby, do you want some more cream and sugar 10 00:00:35,862 --> 00:00:36,965 for your coffee? 11 00:00:37,068 --> 00:00:38,068 - Oh, well, I'll definitely take some cream. 12 00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:39,551 - All right. 13 00:00:39,655 --> 00:00:42,758 - But, uh, come back here and put the sugar right here. 14 00:00:42,862 --> 00:00:46,344 - Ooh, I'd love to. 15 00:00:46,448 --> 00:00:49,068 - Oh, God! 16 00:00:49,172 --> 00:00:51,137 Really? - CALVIN: Go ahead, CJ, 17 00:00:51,241 --> 00:00:52,931 'cause I know you got something to say. 18 00:00:53,034 --> 00:00:54,896 - No, man, no, I'm jealous. 19 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,000 You know, I ain't had no sugar in a while. 20 00:00:57,103 --> 00:01:00,793 - [Ella smooching] 21 00:01:00,896 --> 00:01:05,068 - I don't think he talking about that kind of sugar, baby. 22 00:01:05,172 --> 00:01:07,000 - No, that was just fine. Thank you, Auntie. 23 00:01:07,103 --> 00:01:08,620 - Anytime. 24 00:01:10,758 --> 00:01:13,068 - I mean, you know what I'm talking about, right? 25 00:01:16,241 --> 00:01:20,586 - So, what's everybody doing this afternoon? 26 00:01:20,689 --> 00:01:25,344 - Well, I've got a hot date with the couch and college football. 27 00:01:27,724 --> 00:01:30,172 - If by "couch" and "college football," 28 00:01:30,275 --> 00:01:32,448 you mean "yard" and "rake." 29 00:01:32,551 --> 00:01:35,172 Curtis, I need these weeds out of my garden. 30 00:01:35,275 --> 00:01:37,620 - Oh yeah, that's right. 31 00:01:37,724 --> 00:01:39,965 - Mwah. 32 00:01:40,068 --> 00:01:41,517 - Don't worry, Unc. 33 00:01:41,620 --> 00:01:44,655 I'm sure you'll get a lot of yardage out there. 34 00:01:44,758 --> 00:01:46,413 - Yeah, well, at least I'm not fumbling 35 00:01:46,517 --> 00:01:48,103 in the end zone. 36 00:01:48,206 --> 00:01:52,172 - LAURA: Babe, tell them what we got going on. 37 00:01:52,275 --> 00:01:53,862 - Laura and I have a big day today. 38 00:01:53,965 --> 00:01:55,000 - Yes, we do. 39 00:01:55,103 --> 00:01:56,275 - Are y'all gonna get to it, 40 00:01:56,379 --> 00:02:00,206 or are you waiting on me to upchuck? 41 00:02:00,310 --> 00:02:02,689 - Today we start pre-marital counseling. 42 00:02:02,793 --> 00:02:04,931 The church sent us a survey to get things started. 43 00:02:05,034 --> 00:02:06,137 - Well, don't get too comfortable, 44 00:02:06,241 --> 00:02:09,241 'cause pre-marital counseling ain't no joke. 45 00:02:09,344 --> 00:02:10,758 - Yeah, well, you have to consider, 46 00:02:10,862 --> 00:02:14,103 your bride-to-be was higher than the wedding cake. 47 00:02:14,206 --> 00:02:15,551 - ELLA: Curtis! - LAURA: Calvin! 48 00:02:15,655 --> 00:02:17,896 - My bad. 49 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:21,034 - And you high right now. 50 00:02:21,137 --> 00:02:24,793 - All you two need to do is just be honest 51 00:02:24,896 --> 00:02:26,103 with each other, 52 00:02:26,206 --> 00:02:27,758 and you'll just sail right through. 53 00:02:27,862 --> 00:02:29,655 - Yes, I agree, you know? 54 00:02:29,758 --> 00:02:32,103 We're not gonna have any of those problems, Miss Ella. 55 00:02:32,206 --> 00:02:33,344 We tell each other everything. 56 00:02:33,448 --> 00:02:35,206 - Yes, we do, boo-boo. 57 00:02:38,758 --> 00:02:40,655 - CURTIS: So, Calvin, did you tell her 58 00:02:40,758 --> 00:02:43,103 what you really thought about the dinner she made last night? 59 00:02:43,206 --> 00:02:45,103 - Pops! 60 00:02:45,206 --> 00:02:46,758 - Calvin? 61 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:52,172 - Girl, you know he be... 62 00:02:52,275 --> 00:02:54,620 Girl, come on. 63 00:02:54,724 --> 00:02:57,724 - [phone ringing] 64 00:02:57,827 --> 00:02:59,827 - CJ: See? 65 00:02:59,931 --> 00:03:01,413 It's starting already. 66 00:03:01,517 --> 00:03:03,068 - Yeah, well, I hope that's your wife 67 00:03:03,172 --> 00:03:05,827 so you can tend to your own business. 68 00:03:05,931 --> 00:03:10,379 - Um, Calvin, you told me that you didn't finish the dinner 69 00:03:10,482 --> 00:03:12,689 because you had to go to the gym or something. 70 00:03:12,793 --> 00:03:14,379 - Laura. 71 00:03:14,482 --> 00:03:15,620 - [Curtis laughing] 72 00:03:15,724 --> 00:03:17,965 What he said? - We're clearing. 73 00:03:18,068 --> 00:03:19,206 - That's not what he did. He said... 74 00:03:19,310 --> 00:03:21,482 - Can I, uh... 75 00:03:21,586 --> 00:03:23,000 - ELLA: We're clearing. - That's what he said. 76 00:03:23,103 --> 00:03:24,724 - He ain't go to the gym! 77 00:03:24,827 --> 00:03:25,862 - We're clearing! 78 00:03:25,965 --> 00:03:27,241 - Did he take bags with him or anything? 79 00:03:27,344 --> 00:03:29,034 - Curtis! - Uh... 80 00:03:29,137 --> 00:03:30,620 - Did he leave his jeans? 81 00:03:32,068 --> 00:03:45,172 - ♪ 82 00:03:50,241 --> 00:03:51,724 ♪♪ 83 00:03:55,103 --> 00:03:57,275 - Babe, do we have any scented candles? 84 00:03:57,379 --> 00:04:00,000 - Why, baby? We have to start on this survey. 85 00:04:00,103 --> 00:04:02,137 We don't have any time to set the mood. 86 00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:03,517 - No, no, no, no. 87 00:04:03,620 --> 00:04:06,448 It's just some lingering Indian food smells. 88 00:04:11,551 --> 00:04:13,724 - And you think that smells bad? 89 00:04:16,241 --> 00:04:19,482 - Girl, come on now, girl. 90 00:04:19,586 --> 00:04:21,827 Now you... 91 00:04:21,931 --> 00:04:22,862 Girl. 92 00:04:22,965 --> 00:04:24,137 - Mm-hmm. 93 00:04:24,241 --> 00:04:26,793 - Man, you know my dad be starting stuff. 94 00:04:26,896 --> 00:04:29,793 - Calvin, just tell me. 95 00:04:29,896 --> 00:04:32,275 - Baby, there's nothing to tell you, I promise. 96 00:04:32,379 --> 00:04:34,724 I love that tan-dookie chicken. 97 00:04:37,551 --> 00:04:41,551 - Tandoori chicken, Calvin. 98 00:04:41,655 --> 00:04:44,103 - That. 99 00:04:44,206 --> 00:04:48,206 - Hey, baby, why don't we bet on who our counselor's gonna be? 100 00:04:48,310 --> 00:04:50,517 - Well, it better not be Deacon Windsor, 101 00:04:50,620 --> 00:04:52,965 'cause that man is asleep more often than he is awake. 102 00:04:53,068 --> 00:04:54,551 - Ha, I know, right? 103 00:04:54,655 --> 00:04:57,344 Oh, even worse, Deacon Gilbert. 104 00:04:57,448 --> 00:04:59,655 If you think it stinks in here, then... 105 00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:00,758 - Calvin! 106 00:05:00,862 --> 00:05:02,310 - [knocking on door] 107 00:05:02,413 --> 00:05:04,034 - That's not funny! 108 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:07,000 - I'ma just get the door, 'cause... 109 00:05:07,103 --> 00:05:08,206 Hey, Pop. 110 00:05:08,310 --> 00:05:09,586 - [Curtis grunting] - [Calvin groaning] 111 00:05:09,689 --> 00:05:12,068 - Always stay ready, Son. - What are you even doing here? 112 00:05:12,172 --> 00:05:14,034 - What are you doing here, Mr. Payne? 113 00:05:14,137 --> 00:05:15,586 - Hey, Lakeisha. 114 00:05:15,689 --> 00:05:17,551 - Laura. 115 00:05:17,655 --> 00:05:19,827 - Entering Purgatory, it smells like. 116 00:05:19,931 --> 00:05:21,068 - Right. 117 00:05:21,172 --> 00:05:22,310 - What is that, bad curry? 118 00:05:22,413 --> 00:05:23,689 - Am I wrong? 119 00:05:23,793 --> 00:05:25,758 Did we leave something at the house? 120 00:05:25,862 --> 00:05:30,896 - Oh, no, I escaped the yard when your momma wasn't looking. 121 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,586 I came to watch the game. 122 00:05:33,689 --> 00:05:37,724 Y'all need to get some candles or something. 123 00:05:37,827 --> 00:05:40,724 Hey, Loni, can you give me a beer, a cold one? 124 00:05:40,827 --> 00:05:42,655 Snap, snap? 125 00:05:42,758 --> 00:05:44,827 - CALVIN: Uh, Pops, we a little bit busy. 126 00:05:44,931 --> 00:05:47,689 - Yeah, we were just about to start on our survey, Mr. Payne. 127 00:05:47,793 --> 00:05:51,137 - Oh, it's okay, you won't disturb the game. 128 00:05:51,241 --> 00:05:53,758 College game. 129 00:05:53,862 --> 00:05:57,034 College game. 130 00:05:57,137 --> 00:05:59,896 This thing have batteries? 131 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:03,413 - Okay, it says first we should open with a prayer. 132 00:06:03,517 --> 00:06:05,310 - Okay, good. 133 00:06:05,413 --> 00:06:06,931 All right. 134 00:06:07,034 --> 00:06:08,034 - Dear Lord... 135 00:06:08,137 --> 00:06:09,379 - Yes? 136 00:06:11,620 --> 00:06:14,827 - Dear Lord, thank you for blessing me with Laura. 137 00:06:14,931 --> 00:06:15,862 - Mm-hmm. 138 00:06:15,965 --> 00:06:18,620 - Please help make me worthy of her 139 00:06:18,724 --> 00:06:20,758 and to be able to provide for her. 140 00:06:20,862 --> 00:06:25,000 - Ooh, wow, that was beautiful, baby. 141 00:06:25,103 --> 00:06:26,896 - CURTIS: Now, excuse me, Lisa? 142 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:31,206 I really wish you could provide that cold frosty. 143 00:06:31,310 --> 00:06:32,827 - I'll get it as soon as I finish the prayer, 144 00:06:32,931 --> 00:06:35,103 Mr. Payne, okay? 145 00:06:35,206 --> 00:06:36,620 - Priorities in here. 146 00:06:36,724 --> 00:06:40,448 - LAURA: Dear God, we pray that this can be 147 00:06:40,551 --> 00:06:43,482 a vessel to greater understanding of each other 148 00:06:43,586 --> 00:06:48,965 and a means by which to feed each others' souls, yes. 149 00:06:49,068 --> 00:06:53,241 - Now, being fed sounds good, but I'd be happy with a beer. 150 00:06:53,344 --> 00:06:55,620 - Mm. - Pops, shh! 151 00:06:55,724 --> 00:06:59,068 - Thank you, God, for bringing us together. 152 00:06:59,172 --> 00:07:00,413 In Jesus' name, we pray. 153 00:07:00,517 --> 00:07:01,413 Amen. - Amen. 154 00:07:01,517 --> 00:07:04,000 - Run, fool! 155 00:07:04,103 --> 00:07:05,931 What you doing? 156 00:07:06,034 --> 00:07:09,379 Lilly, where that beer? 157 00:07:09,482 --> 00:07:10,482 About to score. 158 00:07:10,586 --> 00:07:12,379 You ain't got a beer when they score? 159 00:07:12,482 --> 00:07:15,206 Not cold enough. 160 00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:18,275 Gimme one from in the back, in the back of the fridge. 161 00:07:18,379 --> 00:07:21,034 Dig back up in there. 162 00:07:21,137 --> 00:07:22,758 Pull it out. 163 00:07:22,862 --> 00:07:24,241 - LAURA: You got it. - Okay. 164 00:07:24,344 --> 00:07:25,379 - Okay. 165 00:07:25,482 --> 00:07:28,310 - Thank you, thank you, uh, La-La. 166 00:07:28,413 --> 00:07:30,793 La, La, Loo, Laura. 167 00:07:30,896 --> 00:07:33,379 - Well, okay, next it says we should start with 168 00:07:33,482 --> 00:07:35,241 a few ice-breakers. - LAURA: Okay, all right. 169 00:07:35,344 --> 00:07:37,724 - Hey, I could use a piece of gum. 170 00:07:37,827 --> 00:07:38,931 - Mr. Payne. 171 00:07:39,034 --> 00:07:42,034 - Y'all just ain't got cold beer, huh? 172 00:07:42,137 --> 00:07:43,344 - Here, a mint. 173 00:07:43,448 --> 00:07:44,758 I hope you choke. 174 00:07:47,034 --> 00:07:49,241 - That's a horrible way to talk to your dad. 175 00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:51,103 - Okay, so, what does this say, baby? 176 00:07:51,206 --> 00:07:52,413 - Okay. 177 00:07:52,517 --> 00:07:55,413 "Describe your partner in three positive words." 178 00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:57,103 - Okay, that's easy. 179 00:07:57,206 --> 00:07:59,172 Um... 180 00:07:59,275 --> 00:08:01,310 Generous. 181 00:08:01,413 --> 00:08:03,103 Handsome. 182 00:08:03,206 --> 00:08:04,689 - [Calvin chuckling] 183 00:08:04,793 --> 00:08:06,620 - Smart. 184 00:08:06,724 --> 00:08:09,275 - You talking about him? 185 00:08:09,379 --> 00:08:10,206 You talking about Calvin? 186 00:08:10,310 --> 00:08:12,137 - Yes! 187 00:08:12,241 --> 00:08:14,310 - Okay. 188 00:08:14,413 --> 00:08:15,344 - Beautiful. 189 00:08:15,448 --> 00:08:16,413 - Aw. 190 00:08:16,517 --> 00:08:18,448 - Kind. 191 00:08:18,551 --> 00:08:19,724 Passionate. 192 00:08:19,827 --> 00:08:20,965 - Mm. 193 00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:22,172 Accurate. 194 00:08:24,482 --> 00:08:25,827 - CURTIS: Okay, you know what? 195 00:08:25,931 --> 00:08:28,241 Y'all really need to get off script. 196 00:08:28,344 --> 00:08:30,689 - Wait, Pops, our counselor gave us these questions. 197 00:08:30,793 --> 00:08:33,448 - Yeah. - Why should we listen to you? 198 00:08:33,551 --> 00:08:36,241 - Decades of successful marriage. 199 00:08:36,344 --> 00:08:37,689 Failed marriage. 200 00:08:40,034 --> 00:08:44,000 - Okay, so then, what do you have in mind, Mr. Payne? 201 00:08:47,620 --> 00:08:51,413 - Okay, I want you two to describe your partner 202 00:08:51,517 --> 00:08:54,034 with three negative words. 203 00:08:57,931 --> 00:08:59,551 - Okay, I got... 204 00:09:03,517 --> 00:09:06,310 I've got nothing. 205 00:09:06,413 --> 00:09:09,068 - I got something. 206 00:09:09,172 --> 00:09:11,793 - Well, let's have it. 207 00:09:11,896 --> 00:09:16,310 - Well, Calvin, sometimes, 208 00:09:16,413 --> 00:09:18,620 you can be a bit narrow-minded. 209 00:09:18,724 --> 00:09:21,551 - That is true. 210 00:09:21,655 --> 00:09:23,206 - And dishonest. 211 00:09:25,931 --> 00:09:28,206 - Now we getting somewhere. 212 00:09:30,448 --> 00:09:32,241 - ELLA: ♪ Stay with me 213 00:09:32,344 --> 00:09:34,103 I'm looking all over for you. 214 00:09:34,206 --> 00:09:37,448 Hi, CJ. 215 00:09:37,551 --> 00:09:39,137 You back for dinner? 216 00:09:39,241 --> 00:09:41,586 - You cooking, I'm eating. 217 00:09:41,689 --> 00:09:44,103 - I am not cooking no more today. 218 00:09:44,206 --> 00:09:46,448 We're having pizza tonight. 219 00:09:46,551 --> 00:09:48,068 - I like pizza. 220 00:09:48,172 --> 00:09:50,724 As long as it ain't got no mushrooms on it. 221 00:09:52,724 --> 00:09:55,620 - ELLA: Oh, really, Curtis? 222 00:09:55,724 --> 00:09:58,793 You didn't even say good-bye? 223 00:09:58,896 --> 00:10:00,586 - What, I tell you what, it's a good thing I left. 224 00:10:00,689 --> 00:10:02,310 It was divine, Ella, 225 00:10:02,413 --> 00:10:06,862 'cause Calvin and Laura needed my marital expertise. 226 00:10:06,965 --> 00:10:08,689 - Says the husband that will be sleeping 227 00:10:08,793 --> 00:10:10,344 on the couch tonight. 228 00:10:10,448 --> 00:10:11,862 - Exactly. 229 00:10:11,965 --> 00:10:16,172 I know everything not to do. 230 00:10:16,275 --> 00:10:20,241 - You giving them advice, they not gonna make it. 231 00:10:20,344 --> 00:10:24,241 - Actually, that was the case before I stepped in. 232 00:10:24,344 --> 00:10:26,034 - What do you mean, Curtis? 233 00:10:26,137 --> 00:10:29,931 - I mean, they preferred canoodling over honesty. 234 00:10:30,034 --> 00:10:33,310 Anybody with a successful marriage knows 235 00:10:33,413 --> 00:10:36,551 you have to be willing to tell the bald-faced truth 236 00:10:36,655 --> 00:10:38,448 to yo' spouse. 237 00:10:38,551 --> 00:10:39,896 - Well, I don't tell Janine the truth about 238 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:43,896 that pink bedroom she got upstairs. 239 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:46,620 - But that's you. 240 00:10:46,724 --> 00:10:48,000 See, I don't have a problem. 241 00:10:48,103 --> 00:10:50,068 It's easy for me to tell Ella that her new perfume 242 00:10:50,172 --> 00:10:53,586 makes her smell like a funeral home. 243 00:10:53,689 --> 00:10:58,068 - Curtis! Really? Curtis... 244 00:10:58,172 --> 00:10:59,620 - You don't want me letting you walk around 245 00:10:59,724 --> 00:11:02,034 reminding everybody of a repast? 246 00:11:04,379 --> 00:11:07,586 - CALVIN: Okay, so our homework was to write two truths. 247 00:11:07,689 --> 00:11:09,275 - Mm-hmm. - And one lie, right? 248 00:11:09,379 --> 00:11:10,931 - Right, that's it, simple. 249 00:11:11,034 --> 00:11:12,620 - Okay, and then the other needs to figure out 250 00:11:12,724 --> 00:11:13,724 which is which, right? 251 00:11:13,827 --> 00:11:15,241 - That's how you do. 252 00:11:15,344 --> 00:11:16,689 - CALVIN: Okay. - Yeah. 253 00:11:16,793 --> 00:11:20,068 - Number one, I love your pound cake. 254 00:11:20,172 --> 00:11:23,103 Number two, I love your French toast. 255 00:11:23,206 --> 00:11:26,206 Number three, I love your Indian food. 256 00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:27,965 - [Laura sighing] 257 00:11:28,068 --> 00:11:29,413 Let me guess. 258 00:11:29,517 --> 00:11:32,034 The Indian food is a lie. 259 00:11:34,379 --> 00:11:35,275 - CURTIS: You got it! 260 00:11:35,379 --> 00:11:36,310 You got it right. 261 00:11:36,413 --> 00:11:37,655 - You wanted honesty, right? 262 00:11:37,758 --> 00:11:38,965 - Yeah! As a matter of fact, 263 00:11:39,068 --> 00:11:41,620 go and tell her how you felt about it. 264 00:11:41,724 --> 00:11:43,344 Go in, dig in it. 265 00:11:43,448 --> 00:11:44,517 - Tell her? - Dig in it! 266 00:11:44,620 --> 00:11:45,724 - I should tell her? - Tell her! 267 00:11:45,827 --> 00:11:47,620 - It burn my mouth. 268 00:11:47,724 --> 00:11:49,137 It gave me indigestion. 269 00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:50,896 - All that, all that! 270 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,241 - I thought you liked spicy foods, Calvin. 271 00:11:53,344 --> 00:11:55,896 - Not that damn spicy! 272 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:58,896 - See, these are the kinds of things you find out 273 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:01,551 when you been together longer than six months. 274 00:12:01,655 --> 00:12:03,655 - All right, it's my turn? 275 00:12:03,758 --> 00:12:04,793 - Let it out, boo, let it out! 276 00:12:04,896 --> 00:12:05,896 - I get to go next? 277 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,620 - CURTIS: Come on, Lisa, come on, Lisa! 278 00:12:07,724 --> 00:12:08,724 - Number one, what's number one? 279 00:12:08,827 --> 00:12:10,655 - LAURA: Number one. 280 00:12:10,758 --> 00:12:13,000 The sky is blue. 281 00:12:13,103 --> 00:12:15,172 - That's kind of obvious, but... 282 00:12:15,275 --> 00:12:17,034 - Number two. 283 00:12:17,137 --> 00:12:19,620 Water is wet. 284 00:12:19,724 --> 00:12:21,586 - Uh, duh. 285 00:12:21,689 --> 00:12:22,586 - LAURA: And number three. 286 00:12:22,689 --> 00:12:24,344 [Laura chuckling] 287 00:12:24,448 --> 00:12:27,896 I don't think it's too soon for us to get married! 288 00:12:35,793 --> 00:12:36,896 - She's very dramatic. 289 00:12:41,034 --> 00:12:45,655 - ♪ 290 00:12:45,758 --> 00:12:47,896 - So you think it's too soon for us to get married. 291 00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:48,689 Since when? 292 00:12:48,793 --> 00:12:49,758 - [Laura sighing] 293 00:12:49,862 --> 00:12:53,344 Since you just pointed out to me 294 00:12:53,448 --> 00:12:55,103 how little we know about each other. 295 00:12:55,206 --> 00:12:57,482 - Baby, there are things we know about each other. 296 00:12:57,586 --> 00:12:59,793 Like, you got it, what's my favorite color? 297 00:12:59,896 --> 00:13:03,931 - [Laura chuckling] White? 298 00:13:04,034 --> 00:13:07,620 - It's black, actually. 299 00:13:07,724 --> 00:13:10,413 - But, Calvin, you always wear white. 300 00:13:10,517 --> 00:13:13,758 - Baby, that's just because how good it looks on my skin. 301 00:13:13,862 --> 00:13:16,586 - Thank you for proving my point! 302 00:13:16,689 --> 00:13:18,931 - Your point isn't valid. 303 00:13:19,034 --> 00:13:23,000 Look, baby, I love you. 304 00:13:23,103 --> 00:13:24,241 I love you. 305 00:13:24,344 --> 00:13:26,413 That should be the most important thing, right? 306 00:13:26,517 --> 00:13:28,551 - Wrong, Calvin. 307 00:13:28,655 --> 00:13:30,034 You do know that marriage 308 00:13:30,137 --> 00:13:32,655 is about more than just love, right? 309 00:13:32,758 --> 00:13:34,172 - Of course I know that. 310 00:13:34,275 --> 00:13:37,551 My point is we have the most important things. 311 00:13:37,655 --> 00:13:40,931 - Oh, like what? I don't know, being honest? 312 00:13:41,034 --> 00:13:43,931 Feeling like we can tell each other everything? 313 00:13:44,034 --> 00:13:45,931 - That doesn't mean we don't know each other. 314 00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:47,862 It just means you need not freak out 315 00:13:47,965 --> 00:13:49,310 when I do tell you the truth. 316 00:13:49,413 --> 00:13:51,241 - I do not freak out! 317 00:13:55,896 --> 00:13:58,827 I do not freak out. 318 00:13:58,931 --> 00:14:04,103 Calvin, I am easy, 319 00:14:04,206 --> 00:14:06,517 breezy. 320 00:14:06,620 --> 00:14:08,000 - Okay. 321 00:14:08,103 --> 00:14:09,310 - Yeah. 322 00:14:09,413 --> 00:14:11,586 - Okay, so, you always tell me the truth then, right? 323 00:14:11,689 --> 00:14:12,586 - Yes! 324 00:14:12,689 --> 00:14:13,931 - Mm-hmm. 325 00:14:14,034 --> 00:14:16,482 So what happened to my AirPods? 326 00:14:16,586 --> 00:14:18,655 - [Laura chuckling] 327 00:14:18,758 --> 00:14:21,344 [Laura stammering] 328 00:14:21,448 --> 00:14:22,931 - [Calvin stammering] 329 00:14:23,034 --> 00:14:25,206 - [Laura stammering] 330 00:14:25,310 --> 00:14:26,310 - Point made. 331 00:14:26,413 --> 00:14:27,793 Don't just put this on me. 332 00:14:27,896 --> 00:14:29,896 - Who said I was putting all this on you? 333 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:32,793 - "Oh, Calvin, it's too early to get married! 334 00:14:32,896 --> 00:14:35,172 "Calvin, we don't know each other! 335 00:14:35,275 --> 00:14:40,379 Calvin, taste this hot lava I just cooked for you!" 336 00:14:40,482 --> 00:14:43,655 - Is that how I look? 337 00:14:43,758 --> 00:14:44,965 - Yeah. 338 00:14:45,068 --> 00:14:46,517 - You got one more time to talk about 339 00:14:46,620 --> 00:14:48,241 my tandoori chicken, Calvin! 340 00:14:48,344 --> 00:14:50,482 - What, you gonna make me eat it again? 341 00:14:50,586 --> 00:14:53,172 Please, don't... 342 00:14:53,275 --> 00:14:55,206 I'm good. 343 00:14:55,310 --> 00:14:56,344 I'm good. 344 00:14:59,758 --> 00:15:02,344 - [Laura scoffing] 345 00:15:02,448 --> 00:15:05,103 I'm outta here. 346 00:15:05,206 --> 00:15:06,413 - Oh. 347 00:15:10,620 --> 00:15:14,793 Well, then, and them samosas was bad too, baby! 348 00:15:14,896 --> 00:15:18,793 How about that for honesty? 349 00:15:18,896 --> 00:15:21,655 Oh, damn. 350 00:15:21,758 --> 00:15:23,862 - ♪ 351 00:15:26,103 --> 00:15:30,413 - Oh, you shouldn't have! 352 00:15:30,517 --> 00:15:33,000 - What else can I get the man that ruined my relationship? 353 00:15:33,103 --> 00:15:35,344 - Well, you know, beer is always good. 354 00:15:35,448 --> 00:15:38,275 - Ha, ha! 355 00:15:38,379 --> 00:15:40,310 - Calvin, you don't really blame me, do you? 356 00:15:40,413 --> 00:15:41,862 - Oh, well, let's see. 357 00:15:41,965 --> 00:15:44,620 My relationship was fine until you got involved, 358 00:15:44,724 --> 00:15:49,241 and then it wasn't, so I think it's pretty obvious. 359 00:15:49,344 --> 00:15:53,172 - What you saying? 360 00:15:53,275 --> 00:15:55,482 - Wait a minute. 361 00:15:55,586 --> 00:15:56,586 Why is the table set for four? 362 00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:57,862 - [Laura gasping] 363 00:15:57,965 --> 00:16:00,827 No, you guys didn't. 364 00:16:00,931 --> 00:16:02,758 - Hi, Calvin. 365 00:16:02,862 --> 00:16:04,586 Your father thought we should intercede. 366 00:16:04,689 --> 00:16:05,827 - Why you always talking about us, 367 00:16:05,931 --> 00:16:07,655 but when you fighting, it's you? 368 00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:09,034 Think about that. 369 00:16:09,137 --> 00:16:10,241 - Curtis, I didn't even wanna cook. 370 00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:12,689 You the one told me to cook this. 371 00:16:12,793 --> 00:16:15,413 - Sure you ain't gotta tell everybody. 372 00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:19,655 - While your dad's methods left something to be desired, 373 00:16:19,758 --> 00:16:21,689 he was right to push you. 374 00:16:21,793 --> 00:16:22,724 - [Laura scoffing] 375 00:16:22,827 --> 00:16:26,517 Push us, Miss Ella? 376 00:16:26,620 --> 00:16:29,034 Honey, it was more like a shove. 377 00:16:29,137 --> 00:16:31,862 Like a kick, like a punch. 378 00:16:31,965 --> 00:16:34,137 Like a jab. 379 00:16:34,241 --> 00:16:37,655 - Yeah, right off a cliff. 380 00:16:37,758 --> 00:16:40,689 - Okay, can we all sit down? 381 00:16:40,793 --> 00:16:42,724 - Okay, before we partake of 382 00:16:42,827 --> 00:16:46,034 this scrumptious meal I prepared, 383 00:16:46,137 --> 00:16:49,379 I think the four of us need to have a little talk. 384 00:16:49,482 --> 00:16:52,827 - And we think it best that you two listen. 385 00:16:52,931 --> 00:16:56,862 - You two have decided to get married. 386 00:16:56,965 --> 00:17:00,137 You've only been dating for six months. 387 00:17:00,241 --> 00:17:02,482 Not saying that you should not get married, 388 00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:07,758 but there are consequences to that type of decision. 389 00:17:07,862 --> 00:17:09,965 - Like not really knowing each other. 390 00:17:10,068 --> 00:17:13,896 - Not so much that as, okay, here's the thing. 391 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:16,551 Curtis and I have been married for decades. 392 00:17:16,655 --> 00:17:18,896 - A long time. 393 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:20,931 Long time. 394 00:17:21,034 --> 00:17:23,931 - And he still manages to surprise me. 395 00:17:24,034 --> 00:17:25,931 - I'm a mystery, baby. 396 00:17:26,034 --> 00:17:27,275 - ELLA: Right, you are. 397 00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:30,862 You never completely know a person, and that's good. 398 00:17:30,965 --> 00:17:33,310 It keeps the relationship fresh. 399 00:17:33,413 --> 00:17:36,034 - And it leaves room for growth as individuals. 400 00:17:36,137 --> 00:17:38,655 - And what naturally happens as the relationship grows 401 00:17:38,758 --> 00:17:43,379 is you learn to trust each other with the truth. 402 00:17:43,482 --> 00:17:46,000 - Calvin, you didn't think Laura could take the truth 403 00:17:46,103 --> 00:17:47,448 about her tan-dookie chicken. 404 00:17:47,551 --> 00:17:50,896 - [Calvin laughing] 405 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,241 - Tandoori. 406 00:17:53,344 --> 00:17:54,689 Tandoori. 407 00:17:54,793 --> 00:17:56,413 - CURTIS: Okay, okay, whatever. 408 00:17:56,517 --> 00:17:58,482 Get the spice right. 409 00:17:58,586 --> 00:18:01,206 And Calvin should trust in telling you the truth 410 00:18:01,310 --> 00:18:03,241 won't get him in trouble, Loni. 411 00:18:06,034 --> 00:18:08,448 - Laura. 412 00:18:08,551 --> 00:18:11,344 It's Laura. 413 00:18:11,448 --> 00:18:16,517 - And Laura should be able to trust that Calvin will accept 414 00:18:16,620 --> 00:18:19,310 the fact that those little headphones 415 00:18:19,413 --> 00:18:21,931 fell into the garbage disposal when she was over there 416 00:18:22,034 --> 00:18:24,206 doing the dishes, and when she turned it on, 417 00:18:24,310 --> 00:18:26,310 it was just crunch, crunch, crunch! 418 00:18:26,413 --> 00:18:27,620 - Miss Ella, Miss Ella, Miss Ella! 419 00:18:27,724 --> 00:18:30,034 - I said, what is that in there like that? 420 00:18:30,137 --> 00:18:31,482 - [Laura coughing] 421 00:18:31,586 --> 00:18:32,758 - Really? - ELLA: Headphones.- Really? 422 00:18:32,862 --> 00:18:34,000 - She said they were yours. 423 00:18:36,103 --> 00:18:37,379 - CURTIS: Oh, yeah, well, 424 00:18:37,482 --> 00:18:41,379 marriage under any circumstance is hard. 425 00:18:41,482 --> 00:18:43,862 I mean, it's, it's, it's hard. 426 00:18:43,965 --> 00:18:47,310 It's like you want to cut your wrists hard. 427 00:18:47,413 --> 00:18:49,793 Like you wanna choke yourself. You wanna take some plastic 428 00:18:49,896 --> 00:18:52,931 to wrap around your face everyday. 429 00:18:53,034 --> 00:18:55,482 It's hard, it's a test. 430 00:18:55,586 --> 00:18:58,689 - And you all failed the pre-test. 431 00:18:58,793 --> 00:19:00,724 - Failed! 432 00:19:00,827 --> 00:19:03,379 - Lord knows I understand. 433 00:19:03,482 --> 00:19:06,586 I have struggled with your father. 434 00:19:06,689 --> 00:19:09,655 I mean, struggled! 435 00:19:09,758 --> 00:19:10,793 - [Curtis chuckling] 436 00:19:10,896 --> 00:19:13,620 - ELLA: Sometimes, even prayer and patience 437 00:19:13,724 --> 00:19:14,655 would not help. 438 00:19:14,758 --> 00:19:16,068 - [Curtis chuckling] - ELLA: Nothing. 439 00:19:16,172 --> 00:19:17,758 - CURTIS: Okay, I think they get it. 440 00:19:17,862 --> 00:19:20,965 - ELLA: Suffocation faster. - CURTIS: I think they get it. 441 00:19:21,068 --> 00:19:22,586 They get what you're saying. 442 00:19:22,689 --> 00:19:24,448 - The point is, 443 00:19:24,551 --> 00:19:28,724 we learned to grow and love together. 444 00:19:28,827 --> 00:19:30,896 You guys gonna have to make that a priority 445 00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:34,206 or your marriage is going to fail. 446 00:19:34,310 --> 00:19:35,862 - The hardest thing about being married? 447 00:19:35,965 --> 00:19:37,275 - BOTH: Staying married. 448 00:19:37,379 --> 00:19:39,344 - Yeah, staying married. - Huh? 449 00:19:39,448 --> 00:19:41,379 But then of course you already know that. 450 00:19:41,482 --> 00:19:43,586 - ELLA: That's right! - CURTIS: That was horrible! 451 00:19:43,689 --> 00:19:44,689 Well, you know her? 452 00:19:44,793 --> 00:19:47,517 That's your friend, ain't it, Miranda? 453 00:19:47,620 --> 00:19:50,310 - CALVIN: Okay, okay. 454 00:19:50,413 --> 00:19:53,034 Are you willing to learn and grow with me? 455 00:19:53,137 --> 00:19:55,827 - Yes, always. 456 00:19:55,931 --> 00:19:57,517 - Good job, you two. 457 00:20:00,172 --> 00:20:01,965 - Now can we eat? 458 00:20:02,068 --> 00:20:04,448 - Not before we pray. 459 00:20:04,551 --> 00:20:07,000 - Again? 460 00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:08,448 - Of course we pray. 461 00:20:08,551 --> 00:20:09,448 - CURTIS: Okay. 462 00:20:14,310 --> 00:20:16,275 - ♪ 463 00:20:16,379 --> 00:20:18,103 - So you really don't think this vest is stylish? 464 00:20:18,206 --> 00:20:19,758 - [Laura laughing] 465 00:20:19,862 --> 00:20:23,275 - This vest is the ish. 466 00:20:23,379 --> 00:20:27,034 - You got the ish part right. 467 00:20:27,137 --> 00:20:31,689 Now, it is my turn. 468 00:20:31,793 --> 00:20:35,241 Do you like it when I... 469 00:20:38,793 --> 00:20:41,862 - [Calvin chuckling] 470 00:20:41,965 --> 00:20:44,000 Girl... 471 00:20:44,103 --> 00:20:45,620 Now you know I do. 472 00:20:45,724 --> 00:20:47,275 Girl. 473 00:20:50,413 --> 00:20:51,379 Yes. 474 00:20:51,482 --> 00:20:52,793 Yes, let me just get out of this vest. 475 00:20:52,896 --> 00:20:55,172 - LAURA: Yes, please, thank God. 476 00:20:55,275 --> 00:20:56,586 - We should get the wine. 477 00:20:56,689 --> 00:20:58,206 - Let's do that. 478 00:20:58,310 --> 00:20:59,379 - Let's go. - Do you really? 479 00:20:59,482 --> 00:21:00,620 - Let's do it. 480 00:21:00,724 --> 00:21:02,655 - [Laura laughing] 481 00:21:02,758 --> 00:21:04,068 - ♪ 482 00:21:32,965 --> 00:21:34,655 - ♪ 483 00:21:36,758 --> 00:21:38,241 - ♪ 484 00:21:39,275 --> 00:21:42,517 - ♪ 33250

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