Original subtitles

[sigh]

It has been two months.

Our condo should be ready by now.

Baby, the guys are working as fast as they can.

See? - You know what?

I am so sick of this.

Our floors aren't finished, and who knows

what our bedroom looks like?

Baby, Damon said these guys are the best.

What does Damon know?

Damon is the same one who runs his law firm out

of the back of a pickup truck.

And what about Calvin Jr?

Oh, I'm sure he doesn't know any subcontractors.

Sweetheart, I am serious.

We have to get these renovations done within a month

if we want to get joint custody.

And they will be, baby.

You gotta look past all this.

All I see are tarps everywhere.

Half-finished countertops.

This is a disaster.

Well, baby, us standing here, watching them,

isn't gonna make them work any faster.

Yeah, I bet a cattle prod will, though.

Baby, let's go.

Let's go.

Fine.

Let's let these guys work.

Fine.

Guys, you're doing a great job.

Keep it up.

OK, what in the--

Hey, what are you doing?

Get up.

OK, you know what? I knew it.

I knew it.

Get out!

Get out of here!

Are you crazy?

What?

Beer?

OK, you know what?

You're fired!

Oh, I don't believe this.

OK, you know what?

We cannot hire any more shady contractors.

We just have to do this ourselves.

OK, baby, I know you want to help,

but maybe this isn't the best way.

Wait, you don't think I can do this?

No, I'm not saying that.

I just don't think we should take any chances.

Damon said we got one shot at this.

Yeah, and Damon's the same one who

sent the world wide wrecking crew

up in here to fix our house.

Sweetheart, it means just as much

to me to get Calvin Jr back.

OK, so maybe we should try to find another contractor.

With what, Calvin?

I don't know any contractors that work for free.

Now, baby, listen, I've been saying

that I want to flip houses.

What better place to start than right here?

I can do this.

OK, Miranda, but I think that I should

get Pops to help us out too.

OK, that's fine.

So you sure you ready to do this?

What?

Was Harriet Tubman ready to lead the slaves to freedom?

What?

Was Joan of Arc ready to lead the revolution?

Michelle ready to lead the White House?

She doesn't run the White House.

Oh, that's what you think.

[theme music]

[knocking]

What are you doing?

I'm helping.

Right there.

[knocking]

Hm.

What?

[knocking]

[musical pounding]

Are you done?

Mm, mm, mm.

Mr. Payne, what's wrong?

Just like I thought.

Your place is gonna have a lot of hot studs.

Whoa, whoa, pause.

You're too old to be talking like that.

I'm talking about in the walls, Calvin, in the walls.

The studs in the walls.

OK, you know what?

Mr. Payne, I will put you in charge of the fire inspection,

and Calvin and I will do the bedroom.

OK, all right, well, go right on,

Little Miss Project Manager.

Thank you.

Go right on with your bad self.

Yes, please, go somewhere.

Calvin, did you say something?

He said, please, go somewhere.

Nothing.

Pops, you wanna go check the bathroom?

Mm, no, I don't have to.

I can tell by the--

Pops, please, the bathroom.

Oh, OK.

I got it.

You want me to go so you and Miranda can fight.

Nobody's gonna fight.

This is out of control!

You know what, Calvin?

I am the project manager here.

What?

And you need to start listening to--

Excuse me.

Yes, Mr. Payne.

I need a flashlight.

Hall closet.

Over here.

OK, thank you.

Why is it every time I plan something--

All you have done the whole time that you have been here--

--you always got something to say about it.

- --is put holes in the wall. - No, no.

Every time I plan--

Excuse me.

A screwdriver.

Hall closet too.

I need a Phillips.

Top shelf, right-hand side.

OK, thanks.

Y'all go back to fighting.

Calvin, what is the problem?

I don't think this is gonna work.

What do you mean this isn't gonna work?

We have already finished phase one,

and we are 33% done with phase two.

And you're not phased because I'm doing all the hard labor.

Um, excuse me?

I did the whole bathroom by myself.

[chuckle]

Your bathroom is jacked up!

What's wrong with the bathroom?

Can you say "plunger"?

Don't tell me.

In the closet in the hall.

Did you know your walls were painted puke green?

Mr. Payne, it is avocado salamander.

Well, it look like avocado bull--

Pop. [slap]

[smack]

Well if it's that bad, then I can put it on your checklist

to repaint it.

Well, you can also put "rip down the bathroom walls"

on your little checklist, because the avocado bullcrap

walls are not your problem.

Well, what is?

Son, one thing, you only got a month to get all this done.

And the walls in there don't have fire stops either.

None of your walls got fire stops.

You are living in a fire trap.

[sigh]

Oh, this is my grandfather.

Edmund John Wesley.

Now he was born in Albany, and his birthday was on April 1.

Wasn't it April 1, baby?

That's right, baby.

He was the original April Fools.

Curtis, please, baby.

And he was baptized three days later.

Yeah, but it didn't work.

April Fools.

[chuckle]

They should've double-dipped.

Curtis, would you please?

Wow.

He looks like a body builder in this one.

Yes. Now that was my favorite uncle.

Oh, this is my favorite uncle.

He worked all day, every day.

He owned his own business.

And look at him, look at how strong he is, and his legs

were always like that. Look at how strong his--

What the hell is this?

Ain't your family work every day, all day.

Would you stop?

You got the picture upside down.

That's your Aunt June.

What you talking about, your uncle?

Please.

She did have pretty legs, though,

that's 'cause she was a street walker,

Curtis.

Did a lot of walking at night.

Curtis.

Aunt June.

I used to love her, though.

We used to call the original ho.

Curtis!

Would you get outta here?

Just leave us alone.

Wow, you guys are really lucky you know your relatives.

I don't know anything about my family history.

[smack]

I just killed one of your relatives.

What's wrong with them?

[groan]

So how well do you know your dad, DeShawn?

Well, my mom said he used to take me to pick up cars.

What?

You can't drive.

No, no, no.

When he stole them.

He would put me in the car seat so it wouldn't look suspicious.

Oh, that's so sweet.

I never had a positive male role model in my life.

Wow.

And you don't have one now.

[thud]

Curtis!

[laugh]

DeShawn, baby, do you miss your dad?

Yeah.

It's kind of hard when everyone around you has a dad,

and you don't.

When was the last time you saw him?

Well, it was a beautiful day.

Birds were chirping.

He was in the back of the car, waving goodbye.

Where was he going?

Off to war?

No.

Prison.

Say he robbed some old lady.

Grandma ain't never been the same.

Curtis.

Oh, that's too much.

Was he serious?

His daddy robbed his grandmother?

Probably so.

You see how he is.

Curtis, are you thinking what I'm thinking, baby?

What you thinking?

Well, babe, I think I should make

some calls to find out some information about his daddy.

I don't know if you should do that, baby.

That could open a whole, huge can of worms.

Curtis, he's alive, and he's incarcerated.

And I think--

I think it would be good for DeShawn

to just spend some time with his dad.

The boy just said his father robbed his own mother.

You didn't hear him right here?

It can't hurt, baby.

It can't hurt to just find him.

All right, I'm with you.

Yes.

Here we go.

Let's do it.

Let's do it? What?

What are you doing?

I'm gonna find DeShawn's daddy.

What are you talking about?

"Cops" comes on in five minutes.

You are so ugly.

You are so wrong.

OK, I think this high pressure shower head in chrome,

we are gonna use for the master bathroom, OK?

I say we go with brushed nickel.

Maybe.

Can we get one of those hand-held massagers?

For what?

So I can take it off and massage my back.

Why don't you just turn around in the shower?

We're supposed to be collaborating here.

Yes, but I'm in charge.

But if we're collaborating, I should be able to--

No, no, no.

I'm so tired of you trying to tell me what to do.

No, I'm tired of you--

And we have already deci-- what?

Babe, listen, no. Listen.

Shut up.

No, no, no.

Shut up.

No.

Shut up.

I'm the boss.

Shut up.

You said that I could be the boss.

Wow.

Well, so I--

I see the renovation has brought you two closer together.

Yeah, um, not quite sure how we're gonna finish in a month.

Well, I got a call from Tracy's mom,

and she said that the custody court date

has been moved up to next week.

Are you serious?

No, she can't do that.

She can, and she did.

We're supposed to have a month here.

I know, baby.

Don't shoot the messenger.

Well, I'm not, but I don't know what to do.

The place is a mess.

I can't see my son.

Everything is just terrible.

OK, you know what?

You know what?

Baby, it's OK.

We have been dragging our feet on this renovation.

I'm gonna buckle down and get it done.

What do you mean?

I mean that if our court date is in a week,

then this condo will be ready in a week.

How?

Oh, so you don't know that you are dealing

with a force of nature that can bend time and make

things happen right here?

Ha, sing it, Miranda.

Sweetheart, I can change a tire and birth a baby, all

with stilettos on.

Uh-oh.

Mom, I think the paint fumes are getting to her head.

The paint fumes are not getting to my head.

This condo will be ready in a week.

Mm.

And I'm gonna flip a house next.

Flip it.

And then I'm gonna celebrate by baking a cake.

Stop right there.

Ms. Ella.

Baby, I've tasted your cakes.

I've tasted them too.

Hey, who's side are you on?

But I like your cookies.

Great.

OK, that's my cue to leave.

[popping]

Curtis, hey.

DeShawn, what are you doing?

Curtis, what's wrong?

What are you doing?

Nothing.

Both of you are just acting so silly.

Would you please get off this bubble wrap?

Curtis, do you know how much bubble wrap costs?

No.

How much does bubble wrap cost?

$70 a roll.

It don't cost no $70 a roll.

OK.

Get off the bubble wrap!

Thank you.

DeShawn.

Yes?

I have some information for you.

She lying, Ms. Ella, she lying.

Taqualisha is a liar.

I am not that baby's father.

Nope.

DeShawn.

The folks at the Department of Family and Children Services--

[pop]

My friends over at Department of Family

and Children's Services-- [popping]

Curtis. Give me that bubble wrap.

Give me that.

I was satisfied.

Give me that.

[popping]

You poppin' it.

Don't worry about what I do.

Why you poppin' it, baby?

DeShawn, so they gave me these things,

and they thought you'd like this.

Wow. What is it?

Pictures.

Open it up.

It's right here.

It ain't even taped.

Whoa.

He looks just like me.

CURTIS: Yeah, he sure do.

And look, y'all the same height too.

Oh, he's so handsome.

And I think you can learn a lot from your father

about your family.

Oh, wow.

ELLA: What?

Wow.

He's braiding hair.

Curtis.

You wanna go see him?

'Cause I bring you down there myself, Saturday.

And I've been wanting to get my hair cornrowed, so--

well, you take some time to think about it.

OK.

I thought about it.

Let's go.

OK.

Taking you to see the braider.

You know, don't think about it as free plumbing.

Think about it as a billboard for your business.

Every time one of my high end clients

walks across these hardwood floors,

it is an advertisement for your business.

Once I begin raving about how wonderful,

and professional, and inexpensive your work is,

they will be breaking their necks to give you contracts.

[music playing]

[sigh]

Hey, how did it go?

How did it go?

Baby, what happened?

The man wouldn't even come up to the visiting

room to see his own kid.

What do you mean he wouldn't come up to the visiting room?

Just what I said, baby.

What kind of man does that to his own child?

How did he handle it?

I mean, he act like he didn't care, but you know he's hurt.

Hey, baby.

I made your favorite sandwich.

Thanks.

You aight, D?

I'm cool.

Is that the truth?

It don't even matter to me.

I don't care.

You do care, and it's OK.

You just can't let it break you.

Would y'all have done that to y'all's son?

Yeah.

No.

Sometimes, it's not as easy as that.

It is that easy.

They call your number.

You get out your cell.

You walk through the prison, sit down, stick your face

in the glass, and see your son.

That's it.

And that might have been the hardest

thing in the world for him.

What?

Seeing his little boy on the other side of that glass,

and then having to walk back through the prison

and back into his cell.

DeShawn, sometimes, the hardest thing

for grown folk to do is the simplest thing for grown men

to do simply.

What?

[laugh]

So what am I supposed to do now?

Exactly what you're doing now--

stay here and live with this family.

Uh-- [clears throat] Will you slow down?

Whatever, man.

No, D, there's a lot of kids with dads in prison.

Yeah, I know, and it sucks that I'm one of them.

Everything happens for a reason.

At least now, you're living here.

Give my parents a shot.

They're not that bad.

OK, could you stop, please?

Man, Ms. Ella's great.

Thank you, baby.

I'm not here?

Mr. C is aight.

But I also need my mom and dad.

Look, D, I know it's hard.

But sometimes, you gotta accept the cards you was dealt.

Look, everything that I got when I was your age,

you're gonna get.

And everything that my parents are doing for you now,

they did for me.

Everything?

It wasn't that much.

You think they'll give me a car?

Hell no.

OK, see, now you're pushing it.

But I tell you what, whenever you need to roll,

I'll come by and pick you up, and you can hang.

Consider yourself one of the boys now.

So can you take me to parties without Ms. Ella knowing?

I got your back, but I'm not crazy.

What's that?

Where you wanna go?

The strip joint?

Oh, I'll take you.

OK.

[high five]

Come on, come on.

All right, I'm coming, I'm coming.

OK, wait, I'm gonna switch.

I gotta close the door.

I gotta close the door.

It smells like armpits in here.

Hey, listen, don't you start with me.

I did not have time to shower, OK?

You ready?

Here we go.

Wow.

Wow, wow, wow.

Baby, you really did it.

What?

I mean, I knew you can do it, but this is incredible.

Oh, wow.

A Funtachi 4000 in 4D?

Baby.

Baby, you can trace your roots with this remote control.

Mm-hmm.

Where did you get this?

The same place I got the matching one in our bedroom.

You--

Oh, and it's voice-activated with surround sound.

Baby, you got me a sneaker rack installed for my sneakers?

I got exactly the one you wanted.

And the condo is equipped with cameras

that we can view from the web.

Oh, I know what that's for.

What?

For me to tie-- ie-- ie that up.

No.

It's for Christian and Calvin Jr,

so we can make sure they're safe at all times.

Oh.

Oh, baby, how did you pay for this?

Did you pay for this?

No, I didn't.

OK, quick, file out the serial numbers.

Baby, no, no, no.

Listen, listen.

I negotiated, and I bartered.

You should have seen your baby hustling.

And it's all legitimate.

Baby, I am proud of you.

Thank you.

Now all we need is Calvin Jr.

What if something goes wrong, and that doesn't happen?

You heard what your dad said about faith.

He liked her last CD.

No.

Baby, we have to have it.

Hoo-dee-hoo, you two little nasty ones.

Ooh.

Miranda.

Ms. Ella.

[smooch]

This is amazing.

Look at this.

Is this stuff hot?

No, it's all legit.

Miranda, you did it.

This is wonderful.

You did it.

Thank you.

It looks like there was never any damage in here.

What do you think, Calvin?

I think I want to know where Calvin Jr is.

What's going on?

Oh.

Um.

I didn't bring Calvin Jr, baby.

Well, what happened this time?

Well, Calvin, he wanted to ride on Papa's back.

Papa!

Papa.

Look at that. Look at that.

Oh!

[laughing]

CURTIS: Giddy up, giddy up.

It's the big guy.

He's so tall.

It's the big guy.

What's up, man?

Hi, Daddy.

Hi, Daddy.

He's so big.

Is this stuff hot?

Curtis.

Calvin, that Damon did his thing today.

I mean, he really did.

He did all the paperwork.

He had all of the paperwork done and everything.

[kiss]

The social worker was excited that you

guys were getting custody.

So, what do you want to do first?

Well, first, you need to change him,

because he peed all over my back.

I don't think that's pee.

[groan]

Curtis.

No, no, no!

Mr. Payne!

- Curtis, not with that pillow! - No!

No! No!

It's yellow.

Tell them it's ketchup.

You ready?

You ready to play a game?

Yes.

OK, give me five.

Up high.

Down low.

Too slow.

It's all right.

Daddy's gonna always be here for you, OK?

OK.

And you know I love you.

Where are we going?

- Where are we going? - Yeah.

Where you wanna go?

I'll take you wherever you wanna go.

I love you.

I love you.

[theme music]